Get Off The Emotional Rollercoaster (Video) — Shane Idleman

Get Off the Emotional Rollercoaster

Get off the emotional rollercoaster the title reminds us that we're probably on it and you know what that is. Are you as anyone ever on their emotional rollercoaster? Ups and downs highs and lows. Disappointments frustrations failures mountaintop experiences low valleys and We find ourselves in 1st Corinthians 7 so you can turn your Bible if you have your Bibles.

Walking in God's Calling in 1 Corinthians 7

I hope you do turn to 1st Corinthians 7. There's Bibles in front of you. 1st Corinthians 7 verse 17. There's actually too much text to put up on the screen. So I'm gonna read it when I get there, but something happened amazing on Wednesday night God just really took over in the message and in the worship and that message is now available.

The title is eight ways that God speaks to us. Eight ways that God speaks to us so if you're wanting to know God's voice if you're wanting to discern his will make sure you get that CD and Make sure you listen to Wednesday nights message and there's been almost as many people's in the sanctuary and Wednesday nights at 6 p .m.

We have another service Wednesday nights at 6 p .m. I'm teaching on something completely different. Shane does that take a lot of time? Yes, it does pray for me because it's it's it is a lot of work to Prepare two sermons, but I believe it's what God's called me to do one reason pastor Abrams coming on board is to help Alleviate some of what is involved with leading the church.

So here's what happens or here's what actually is happening in Corinth. Remember 1st Corinthians is written to a church in the in the area of Corinth that it was called Corinth. And that's why they're called Corinthians.

They are coming to know Jesus, but now they're confused. Well, should I stay married? I married an unbeliever. Should I Not be circumcised anymore if you can imagine that one, can I do this? Well, I've committed to be a virgin should I still be a virgin.

Can I marry now? And there's so much confusion that Paul is writing these letters to the church. So he said this but as God as God Paul's writing to the church, but as God has distributed to each one so in other words.

However, God has put you God has distributed God has given you certain giftings as the Lord has Called the Lord called each one. So let him walk and in other words. However, God has called you whatever situation you're in.

Walk in that calling walk in that situation. Don't run out of a job just because it's difficult. Don't run out of a marriage just because it's difficult. Don't run out of a challenging situation just because it's difficult.

Don't move somewhere just because it's difficult. Don't do all these things stay the course where God has called you until he releases until he moves you. But I like what he said. Ellipses. I put ellipses meaning I took out some of the scriptures there because I want to get right to the point.

Keeping the commandments of God is what matters. Should we say that again? Keeping the commandments of God is what matters. And then he said in verse 24 brethren. The church let each one remain with with God in the state in which he has called.

So they're writing letters to Paul wondering if they can divorce. Wondering if they can separate. Have you ever been there? That's quiet on that one. Mm-hmm. We have a lot of people have been there thinking did I marry the right person?

What should I do? What should I do in this day God? I don't know and God's Word gives us clear just clear instruction on this. So a couple things I'm gonna stop here and talk about number one. No need to give up your identity.

Remaining Faithful to God's Calling

So when a person becomes a Christian, there's no need to be to give up that identity. Do you ever see a person they become a Christian and then now they don't want to relate to their friends anymore. They dwarf into something that's kind of weird, you know, be like me trying to dress like a 16 year old skater.

Probably not gonna look to you know, just stay. Just stay how God has created you don't try to break free of something if God has you in a spot stay there that identity and We should be proud of our identity because God's going to use us to relate to others and minister to others.

In a way in which he called us how you were created. See, I believe it or not. I don't minister to a lot of PhDs or people. Wanting apologetics and even though I love apologetics my ministry. Often as a shepherd to the shattered to the broken to tell them you can get up again.

You can fight this fight again. You don't have to have a perfect education. You don't have God can use you though. And actually the more you've been forgiven The more you love and there are PhDs who go here.

Don't get me wrong, but God if I try to change it. Well, let me just kind of fit. Let me just be this the smart intellectual guy. You know this theology guy because I want to you know, kind of relate to this other group.

He's that God just said just be who you are. Don't try to be someone else be how you how I created you and you'll be most effective. Isn't that true when we're transparent? This is who I am and we're not putting on a mask or or trying to be something.

We're not. Often when I talk a lot of young pastors follow our ministry now I was I've come to shock sometimes from all over the United States and they'll email me questions and. And I will tell them sometimes just be who you are.

Don't try to preach like this person on the radio and this person and and try to just be how be who God Created you to be and that's where there's safety. That's where the there's the anointing of the Holy Spirit.

Christian Freedom and Obedience

It's interesting though when he said keeping the commandments of God is what matters no man is freer than a Christian. No man is freer than a Christian they are keeping the course and Society says Oh God's rules.

Oh, it's like a it's like a cage around you. You can't do anything. No, we're actually freer than the world. Free to love God free to do others free to do everything within his boundaries of safety and protection.

Those who outside of that are actually bound To sin bound to their flesh bound to to to to being Distant from God and it's a sad thing to see somebody bound in their sin thinking they are free. And I want to encourage you to keep coming for Corinthians because we're gonna talk about a lot next week.

I believe is actually when we talk about Liberty and that we have certain Christian liberties. That could fall under anything from alcohol. What about now a big thing marijuana? What was the Bible say?

Well, you have to wait till next week. Liberty there. There are liver. There are boundaries to our liberties. Also, we're gonna talk about as we keep going with the gifts of the Holy Spirit. Paul talks about the gifts of the Holy Spirit.

Did you know the Holy Spirit has gifts unless you think that doesn't apply today? We just cut it out of our Bible some scissors. Paul gives direction to the church. He talks about head coverings. Oh. What does it say about that what why is there a debate on that so we're gonna tackle all these issues in the coming weeks.

Contentment in Every Circumstance

So here's the key takeaway from this first portion of Scripture. We must be content in all Situations getting off the emotional roller coaster involves setting your mind on being content. I don't know about you.

But my emotional roller coaster goes like this when I'm not content. When we when we when we think we want this we want that or we want it's about us. He says how he says be content in all situations.

Paul said I've learned how to be content when I'm rich and when I'm poor when I'm busy and when I'm slow when Things are going great when things are not going great one of the best ways to ride that emotional roller coaster on a flat line is to just be content and Here's how you can be content recognizing that God is sovereign.

God is sovereign and there's a big issue. I don't know if I'll ever tell you about it. That we've been praying about for a while. I've got confirmation on it and I pray sometimes and I fight. I fight doubt.

I Fight doubt. That's impossible God and I just had this thought today the same God that sung that hung the Sun 33 million miles away and gave the earth the right atmosphere the right rotation on the axis.

He the moon the gravitational pull that same God that same God can do whatever he wants. Nothing is impossible. That's why I felt like the man God I believe oh, do I ever believe but help my unbelief.

Where's this coming from and you can beat yourself up? I believe I want to believe so much. But here it comes here comes that unbelief from the flesh from the enemy the world other people. That's why I don't tell your dreams to everybody.

Don't tell your dream. I learned that real early on. Real early on. I'm so excited. I'm a Christian. I think God's calling me to preach you Shane stick with digging ditches man, just pipe dream and that will kill your dreams and You listen to the voices of others and not because often what God speaks to you.

He's not telling others. I Love what Paul said when he became a Christian. The Bible says I did not immediately confer with flesh and blood means I didn't ask for anybody's opinion. I went and spent time with God to get my identity to get my focus to get my bearings.

And if you want to be content this morning, just say God, I'm giving all of this to you all of this to you. But Shane my financial woes, they're not yours. They're his if you give them to him. But this is happening in my marriage.

Give it to him but Shane you don't understand my kids it's chaos in my home. Oh, I understand that one. Give it to him. Because see then it becomes his problems. Cast all your cares upon me for my burden is light and my yoke is easy.

Jesus said and you but you have to do this mentally don't you. You cast you cast those cares upon him cast those cares upon Him and get rid of the naysayers. Get rid of the negative gossipers that are pulling you down.

Remove it because they'll just continue to drain that from you. But I don't want to skip over this. Keeping the commandments of God is what matters. How popular is this right now? Keeping the commandments of God is what is is is not popular, but it is what matters and I was just reading this week.

Legalism, Grace, and the Call to Obedience

I love this story. I remember it from many years ago a Reporter a news reporter accused Billy Graham of setting the church back 50 years. Billy said I was trying to set it back 2 ,000 years. Oh Man. He is absolutely right.

You've got to go back to the old truth to the old path paths and the pastors pulpits should preach God's truth the totality Of it 2 ,000 years ago and today the same truth preach keeping the commandments of God.

Keeping those commandments and a church will struggle in this area. I've shared this before you can have the church where it's all about the commandments, right? Come on. Are you following the commandments?

Are you are you following? Are you are you good Christians? Let me see your tithe records. Are you watching Netflix? Are you watching these junk movies and bad movies and keeping what is your dress down to your feet?

No makeup. Keeping the commandments, come on guys. But then you have this other note and half of that's not God's commandments. No, don't don't worry about. I mean you should you should be concerned with what you watch and your appearance of modesty.

I'm not saying that but the church can be beating so many people up with with legalism. We follow you around. Like you is that a sin? And It's it's really just it's it's what this this church is called the legalistic Church.

The heart have you ever seen those churches they're hard. They're rigid. They don't smile when you come in. They're just good morning. What brings you here? Where's your Bible and It's commandments commandments commandments.

You will run your kids out of your homes if it's all about rules and no relationship. But what's the other side? This is just as dangerous. God is love grace, brother. You Left your spouse. Don't worry about it.

God's grace will cover you cover you you and your girlfriend have fun at the movie and Pastors don't preach sin. They don't preach repentance. They don't preach God's Commandments because it's gonna hurt your feelings.

If we don't live in a time in a place where we need to start hurting some feelings. I don't know where we live. We need to start crushing some pride crushing some feelings and. But the church can be too soft and nobody changes.

It's just full of people who don't want to use a word and that word is obedience. I Can't get through one day of Bible reading where the word obedience doesn't somehow register. It's finding that middle ground.

Keeping the commandments now be encouraged that we're keeping. Chuck Swindoll used it in a sermon and I looked it up and he's writing the money. It's like keeping the course. So there's a ship and it's it's but it drifts a little.

See, that's why we encourage people. We don't beat people up caught in sin. We encourage them now there might be a time for conviction. For pushing down hard on someone who's unrepentant and they're just they need a wake-up call, but they're keeping that course.

So are you that's what matters. Are you keeping the course? Have you drifted off course then get back on? Have you fallen off course then get back on keeping the course is what matters keeping that that commandments of God not with Rigosity and and being mean-spirited, but not with just lukewarm living.

It's a it's a it's a love for God and a love for God's Word a love for others. It's hump humility. It's broke. It's keeping that course come hell or high water. I will keep that course you messed up at home.

You tell your kids you tell you I told a guy yesterday you tell your kids you're sorry. You tell your kids your daddy's gonna change you tell them you look them in the face and you own it. You keep the course and we have to get back on track and keep that course and direct our families back to God.

Trusting God When the Future Is Unclear

When you're content in Christ the pressures from this world will not push you down like they are now. Problems will not be as great preoccupations. Will not be as difficult and getting caught up in all these different things.

So let me give you another key takeaway. Trust trust trust. What does that look like practically trust. I wrote down a lyric of a song we do sometimes. The line goes something like this when I only see in part I Will still trust you.

I will prophesy your promise. Meaning I will speak your truth into my life. When I only see in part it's okay for a Christian when they only God. I don't know how this marriage is going to work, but I trust you.

I Don't know how my kids are ever gonna know you again. They've drifted so far, but I trust you. I don't know where this health issue is going God. I don't know. I just been diagnosed with this. I've got this call, but I trust you.

I look to you. Because real faith if you because we talk about faith all the time don't we we sing about it we preach about it. Faith is actually the substance of things not seen. So to really please God to really have faith.

You're not going to see the fruit just yet. It's like going out here's what faith is it's like going out back and you planted an apple seed, but you just see dirt. We have more faith in an apple seed.

I'm often oh I know it's not there yet, but it's coming. I planted the seed last week. But when it comes to God sometimes we forget that principle that we're not gonna always see and then verse 25 He said now concerning virgins.

He's speaking to singles. I Have no command from the Lord yet I give judgment as one whom the Lord in his mercy has made trustworthy. In other words I don't have a commandment for the Lord, but God I believe has given me this wisdom.

Paul says to say this. I Suppose therefore verse 26 that this is good because of the present because it because of the present distress. What Paul's saying there is because there's persecution. And I think we forget.

About this important element. Did you know the early church was persecuted? Did you know that many? Husbands would watch their wives being killed. They would watch their children being thrown to lions if they did not denounce Christ.

Read Fox's Book of Martyrs read about what the early church had to endure. So Paul's saying because of the current distress actually there was one of the emperors. They would take Christians and bind bound them and then he would light them on fire to light the streets of Rome.

It's all historical and so Paul's saying because of this current distress it's best to remain single. How many know that would be much easier to get through than being married with kids and watching that that that just devastation?

So he said it's good for a man to remain as he is. Are you bound to a wife that do not seek to be loosed. Make that work? Are you loose from a wife. Do not seek a wife in other words? Don't don't go out.

I got to get married. I got to get married. You ever meet those people. Maybe you're here today. Application time. I Got to find somebody. I got to find somebody. Got to find somebody. And what happens in that setting is you lower your standard?

The problem with many singles is they don't raise their standard and miss it. They lower it and they hit it. Let God bring that person. But also where you look is what you find. If you're looking in the bars and nightclubs online chat rooms.

Which might have their purpose and I've heard people meant on those things which can be good if you use wisdom, I guess but Where are you looking? Are you following God and see who he brings? Because when you're trusting God you can be on your way home from church.

You can get a flat tire and the knight in shining armor stops to help. That was God moving, but there's also something wonderful about singleness. Wonderful and If me and my wife could get this one element back.

I know we would you can seek God with all your heart. You can get up and seek God. You can go up back on the porch and read the Bible. You can go take a drive and seek God. You can go to a church event in the afternoon seek God.

You can put on Worship and see you're just seeking God being saturated by his power and by his presence. There's a blessing there. So don't waste your life being disappointed. Again, trust God and see what he can do.

So he goes on to say if a virgin marries she is not sinned. But if you do not marry you have not sinned. He says i'm just trying to save you trouble In this world. I want to spare you that trouble. So again, the context is this church had questions.

They just went from darkness to light now. They're believers. What do we do with this? He said do not seek to be married do not seek to be separated be content where God has put you. And i've learned that sometimes God puts me where he puts me in order.

Should I learn contentment? He'll put you somewhere and say when you're content, then you can be released. So here's the key takeaway don't look for fulfillment in relationships or in changing your situation.

Here's the emotional roller coaster. Oh, no. And we jump off we change our situation it doesn't help we're still on this and we look for we look for identity and relationships we look for uh, the what's that what's that saying the grass is.

Grass is greener on the other side. No, it's not. It's green wherever the water is hitting wherever you're feeding it. Or yeah feeding feeding the grass water. You got it. Okay, that sounded weird at first.

So don't look for fulfillment and relationships or in changing your situation the grass is rarely greener if God changes your situation. There is there is there is a greener grass. There is hope on the other side of the fence.

But if you're just looking for those things, do you know how many people I don't want to you know? I want to be careful here, but that i've talked to that are on their second marriage. Just this week.

I heard of a lady. They're actually divorced now. She will be going into a third. She gets married and they'll say I should have just made the first one work. Or they're in their second and say this is i'm just as miserable.

I don't know what happens. Well, because when the honeymoon's over life sets in. Now many second marriages can be wonderful. I'm, not saying that it all has to do with what foundation are you building it?

Are you trusting in God? Are you giving him these cares and then verse 29, but this I say brethren the time is short. Do you not see that today? So that from now on even those who have wives should be as though they had none.

Uh-oh, are we supposed to leave our spouse? No, that's clear in the teaching. We just did last week. Those who weep as though they do not weep those who rejoice as though they did not rejoice those who buy as though they did.

Not possess. And those who use this world As not misusing it. What's he saying here. Well, he goes on to clarify right here for the form of this world is passing away in a nutshell live for god in everything you do.

If you have a wife. Live as a live as though you don't have one. In other words I'm, not going to let this become my entire life my my wife my work this I have no time for god. How often do I preach on that god's on the back burner by the broccoli and we've got the steak up on the we got.

You know the back you just whatever that broccoli can go bad. Every every time we have stuff on our back burner. We end up throwing it out a couples later because a couple days later we forget it's on the back burner.

But god says no i'm the priority put me at the forefront. Let me guide your relationship. Let me be the foundation on which your marriage is built live for god. Paul is is is trying to press that point home.

Living for Christ in a Changing Culture

And sure live for eternity. Eternity. I like what jim. Garlow said you remember when he spoke here? It's on the radio right now on the weekend saturday and sunday nights at 5 91 .1 actually if you know people.

Uh in out of the area, we have an app where they can listen 24 hours a day seven days a week. Wherever they're at in the world. On the website, but he's right now he's talking about this. He just said this yesterday.

You can be on the wrong side of history, but on the right side of eternity. Eternity. That is the christian today. That is the christian today. What i'm preaching what i'm promoting what i'm writing about?

I i'm about i'm going to release an article written to the leaders of california this week. They probably won't read it. But at least i'll get off my chair. I i'm i'm on the wrong side of history. But the right side of eternity same with you when you live for god.

That's that's not where history is going brother. Come on exclude everybody should be welcoming and everybody's. There's there's all religions lead to god all sexual preferences. I don't care if you want to marry your cat.

That's okay. Come on, man, get it get with the bandwagon. You're old-fashioned. You're trying to take the bible back 50 years. No, i'm trying to go back 2 000 years to what god said because truth doesn't change that's where we get our logo from times change.

Truth does not. Truth is the foundation of every building that will ever be built. Truth is the gauge by which by which you gauge your standard of living. Truth is the plumb line for which you see if everything is level truth is the embodiment of what god has spoken.

It's the lighthouse that directs us. It's the compass that leads us when the truth see here's what's happening. The california and the nation is trying to build on a foundation that has eroded. Why don't they build a house on a river?

I mean, I guess you could if you put the right float device, but you don't build a house on a bad foundation. The first thing if you're building a house what you're going to do first. You're going to go to the county and pay a lot of permit fees number one.

But then what are they going to do. Are they just going to well, let's just start here's a let me put a two by four. Let's just start building the house on this piece of dirt. They go down deep. I know I used to do that.

You get in that big cat loader and you start taking out thousands and thousands and thousands and thousands of tons of dirt. And you bring it in one foot at a time with a water truck and you compact it days and weeks of compacting and compacting.

And compacting they'll come out and they'll bring a soils engineer to test it to make sure you compacted it hard enough. And in addition to that they're going to make sure you don't have your water content is not too high and not too low.

We haven't even built a house yet. The foundation the foundation that is everything. Then they pour the concrete. Now you can build the house. And they're trying to build a house our nation our state of california beautiful state of california.

I love this state. I was born here. My kids were born here. I can fly fish in a couple hours. I can go to the beach and I can go ski board snowboarding if you think I still snowboard. I do sometimes. My son talks me into it.

I'll have to film it for you. You probably don't believe me. But that that truth is the foundation the wrong side of history. But the right side of eternity that will be your life. Get over it now to popularity contests.

They're gone not ever being mocked or criticized for what you believe that is over. Your puritan america your little house on the prairie is over. It's time now for the christians to say Okay, you've pushed too far we're pushing again, but we're pushing with prayer and with fasting.

See, that's why I say you can you have your your gun safes are full, but your prayer closets are empty. That's how you're going to change our nation by praying pulling down heaven. We don't need more banquets or fundraisers.

We need men and women on their face before god crying out and saying god save us redeem us set us free. Wrong side of history, but the right side of eternity. So the key takeaway is live for christ and everything.

Christ as the Foundation of Every Area of Life

In marriage and the ups and the downs and business and all areas of life. Jesus is not a divided savior. Well, he's important to my marriage. I've had people tell me this. I can't bring that into my workplace.

Shane if I start using godly principles i'll have to be honest on my taxes. I can't write all that stuff up. Right write that stuff off. I can't keep using aliases. I saw this in real estate all the time.

When I was in real estate many years ago. There's something called an arm's length agreement. Means you can't Short sell your house and then try to buy it somehow but people tried. They'd open up fake corporations or have their uncle sister.

But they're christian at sunday see that you're going to be miserable. You're going to be miserable. Christ has to take dominance in every area of your life finances your relationships. Verse 32, but I want you to be without care.

Paul says he who is unmarried care for cares for the things of the world he who pleases how he may please the lord. But he who's married cares about the things of the world how he may please his wife.

So paul's saying if you're unmarried you can care for the things of the lord. But if you're married you have to care for the things of your spouse. In other words as a married christian. Yes, god is your foundation, but you cannot have that at the and have your marriage and your family suffer.

It's not like man. I'm following christ. I'm leaving you guys in the dust. Good luck. It's now now you have to care for the things of this world. Even though god is the priority. And god loves marriage god designed marriage.

It's his gift. So here's another key takeaway on this emotional roller coaster. Fulfilling our responsibility Leads to contentment when you fulfill your responsibility. It leads to contentment. This is something I always try to tell men in men's conferences.

Responsibility, Family, and Contentment

Somehow or some way men wake up sit up listen to this. Don't think about lunch. It's not done time yet. You will only find commitment when you fulfill your responsibilities as a husband and a father first.

Actually, i'll take a step farther when you when you fulfill your responsibility of being a devoted follower of christ. And god is your foundation christ is your priority from that foundation. Now you take on that responsibility of being a better husband a better father and you fulfill your responsibilities at work and you fulfill What god's called you to do that leads to contentment.

Most men are miserable. Why. Because they're chasing the almighty dollar and forgetting about what's really important. The enemy's got them so hoodwinked into believing That that's what's important. How many times you've heard this or said this?

I'm, the man of this house. I bring home the money. I call the shots now, I don't think i've said that in 18 years, but. There's they that that see that's a priority. And they're discontent. They're angry.

They're often abusive because they're not fulfilling what god called them to do. First see god is a god of order and priorities. He says you build your life on me. I'm the foundation when the storm comes your house will not fall.

And then now you love your wife as christ loved the church women you respect your husbands you honor your children. You don't exaggerate. Exasperate thank you very much. My dyslexia is coming back. So you don't do that you build on that you build on that and then your your business or your career.

Follows that it does not become the priority. And paul goes on to say there's a difference between married and single. The unmarried cares about the things of the lord. But she who is married cares about the things of the world how she may please her husband.

So paul says i'm not trying to hinder you but I want you to serve without distractions. Most singles are not focused on god. What are they focused on finding? Mr. Or mrs. Right forgetting that you first have to become Mr. Or mrs. Right.

Is that interesting? Oh if I could just have this person. They just love the lord and they're always at worship and they read their bible if I could well. Why don't you be that person? Why why aren't you that person first?

See we have to we we you attract who you are. You attract who you are. You'll track that type of person. And then he goes on to say something interesting to the dads. If you committed to keep her a virgin, but are now having second thoughts.

Maybe the man dedicated i'm paraphrasing. Maybe the man dedicated her to the lord paul saying it's okay to marry. He says this in verse 30 form 39. Check this out. There's a difference between being married and single.

There is a difference between being married and being single. The unmarried woman cares about the things of the lord. But she who is married cares about the things of the world how she may please her husband.

Oh, that's what I did. I'm sorry. I took out this whole section. It was about this long on dads to the virgins in a nutshell. He's telling the dads the fathers which is hard. It's hard application here because if you can believe this young adults.

Your dad used to tell you who you're marrying. It's called arranged Marriage and it still happens. Today, can you imagine I can't even imagine that. What about they introduce you and you're like, oh lord.

No sparks. There's just nothing. What were you thinking? So he's saying and some dads would say this this and this. I don't know if you ever read that story where a man Won a victory and he told god whatever comes out of my house first.

I'm going to give it to you and the bible kind of alludes to the point that he had to sacrifice his daughter. I don't really see that. I don't really see god allowing that or that that's the heart of god.

What I see is that he committed Her to the lord as a virgin and she went and actually wailed her virginity for 30 days up on the mountains. With her friends and I believe it's the father used to say no.

We're dedicating you to the lord. You're you're single for the rest of your life. So paul's actually saying dads if you made that commitment, it's okay to let them marry. But if you want to keep them single.

It's okay to do that as well. So there's a lot see there's a lot of flexibility and freedom in christianity. I'm hoping to talk about in the weeks to come on having liberty. What does a christian liberty mean?