Building a Home For Christ — Zac Poonen

We adults may have felt a bit left out so I'd like us to teach you all a song. Jesus loves me. This. I know though my hair is white as snow though my sight is growing dim. Still he bids me trust in him.

Though my steps are oh so slow with my hand in his I'll go on through life let come. What may he'll be there to lead my way. Praise the Lord. God is good all the time to adults and children. So the session is for married couples.

Building the Church Through Godly Families

There are two relationships we have. One is as husband and wife and the other is parents and children in our home. And to see something of the importance of this I'll tell you how we've done it in the 47 years that we've had our churches in about 14 countries over a hundred or more churches.

And we've taught this. The church is like a building. The foundation is the perfect assurance that God has become our father that our sins are forgiven. Jesus Christ is my Savior. If you don't stop there you have no foundation.

God is my loving father. And if earthly fathers know how to give good things to their children how much more my heavenly father will give me. All that I need. Not all that I want not all that I ask but definitely all that I need.

That's certain. So I must never move away from that foundation at any time. We are often tempted in this evil world to move away from that foundation. Then the first floor is our personal walk with God.

We have to begin there keeping our conscience clean all the time like they say keep short accounts with God no credits immediate payment. That means if you committed sin immediately confess it. Ask the Lord to forgive.

You don't wait till the evening. If you get a thorn in your foot you don't wait till the evening to pull it out. Pull it out immediately. If you get a speck in your eye you clean it out immediately. Why should we treat sin any differently.

It's more serious than a thorn or a speck immediately. Keep a clear conscience. That is the first floor. You cannot build a church if you don't start with the foundation and that first floor then the second floor above that is our family life.

You can't build a church without a family life. In fact Paul tells Timothy when you're appointing elders in the different churches make sure that you look for elders who have these qualities. He says in 1 Timothy and chapter 3 he says number one they must be a husband of one wife.

They should not be divorced. People who got two wives one living somewhere else and one they're married to. So it must be a husband of one wife and must be someone who knows how to manage his own family.

1 Timothy 3 4. Well family life. Because keeping his children under control with dignity. Because if a does not know how to take care of three or four children in his own home how will he take care of a church with the 50 60 people.

He can't even handle four children at home or two children at home. They're all wayward disrespectful. Such people should never be made elders. So we followed that rule in our churches that if a man's we have about 150 elders in all our churches in different countries.

And if ever there's a testimony that one man one of the elders children are wayward. I don't mean when they leave home and they're on their own but when they're at home. Speaking here about managing his own family.

So when the children are at home if they are not brought up with the respect for the parents and respect for the older people in the church such a man is not fit to be an elder. So we teach in the church we must bring up our families in a godly way.

So to bring up our children in a godly way and then sorry let me come to the last. And then on top of the family is the third story third floor which is the church building people together in fellowship as one body not just as a club.

Lot of churches are clubs. There's a little book written at the back a little booklet actually written by Santosh called a congregation or a club or a church. And he says there that some churches are actually congregations.

Some are clubs and some are churches. What is the difference. And he takes the two arms of the cross and he says the congregation is where an individual may have a wonderful relationship with God in himself.

But he sits there along with a maybe 30 40 100 others who also have a good vertical relationship but no relationship with each other. They're like people sitting in a cinema theater. They're all interested in what's happening up in front maybe the singing or the preacher but no connection with each other.

That's not a church that's a congregation. Those people may come to the cinema theater regularly and sit there as faithful members and pay their tithe and everything. But they have no horizontal relationships only the vertical arm.

I walk with God myself alone. That's Old Testament. The new covenant is a body. The second thing he says a club a club is only the horizontal arm. Oh we have a wonderful time with each other. Just like in a club they play billiards or golf.

Or here we come together and sing songs and listen to a message. We have no personal connection with God. I mean we slip up and sin and all. But we are wonderful fellowship with each other. That's a club.

Then comes the church which have both arms where each person has got a personal relationship with Jesus Christ. And they seek to love one another as Christ loved them. That is the church. Read that booklet is just a few pages.

So that's what we have taught. So in the matter of bringing up children there's one verse in the New Testament I would show you a couple of verses Ephesians chapter 6. Fathers do not provoke your children to anger.

Fathers Must Not Provoke Their Children

It's written especially to fathers. We can get so upset with our children when they do something wrong. Or maybe we didn't teach them to do right. I told the fathers in our church when your children are small and they're building something with toys or Lego blocks or something like that and they really don't know how to do it.

They don't know how to look at the pictures. And you say okay son or my girl I'll help you make it. And you know how children are. No no dad I can do it on my own. And they try and try for about 10 -15 minutes or half an hour and they get fed up and they say they can't do it.

Then they come to dad and say dad can't do it. What do you tell them. Many fathers will say I told you that I have told husbands and wives and parents never use those words in your home. I told you that that's the language of the expert.

That's what destroys relationship. When a wife tells her husband I told you that long ago her husband tells her wife I told you that it's the expert. Or telling a child the child just get discouraged.

What should you say say. Never mind. Let's fix it. That's a better word to say than to say I told you that. And then sit down with your child and fix that. Or with your wife some problem solved. Never mind darling let's fix it.

Nothing. The world's not collapsed. We can fix that easily if Christ could fix the world's problems on the cross. What is this little thing we have in our home. Why make a big fuss about it. Remember this.

Please remember what you heard today. Never say I told you. So never say why in the world did you do that. Or why in the world didn't you tell me somebody left a message on the phone and your wife forgot to tell you.

Okay we all make mistakes. The world is not going to collapse just because you didn't get that message that day. Maybe you lost a little money. That's okay. Maybe God saw you loves money so much so that God allowed your wife to forget to tell you that so that you lose a little money.

I'll tell you from my personal experience number of times when I've earnestly I prayed earnestly for many years years and years and years and years 40 50 years. Lord free me from the love of money because you said you cannot love God and money.

And I want to love God with all my heart. I don't want an atom of love of money in my heart because I will not be able to serve you then. And you know how God has delivered me from it little by little by making me lose large sums of money.

I mean I never starved. He made sure that I had enough to eat and drink and feed my children. But it was a big loss not some small amount for me anyway. It was a big loss compared to the level of income I had and wealth I had.

And I asked the Lord Lord why. The Lord said didn't you pray a few weeks ago that you should be freed from the love of money. Well I'm helping you. I said praise the Lord. This is an answer to prayers.

It great. I thought somebody swindled me. I thought my carelessness I lost money. No God allowed it so that I can be free from the love of money. Have you ever shouted hallelujah when you lost a large sum of money.

I've done it because it is an answer to my prayer. We all need it brother. If you think you don't love money you are probably the one who loves money the most. You haven't seen your need. So we had to be careful.

But we don't provoke our children to anger by the way we speak to them but bring them up. It says in Ephesians 6. For in the discipline and instruction of the Lord discipline and instruction instruction from the Bible.

Discipline and Instruction From the Lord

I remember hearing a song sung by somebody here in the US that he said in my home. It's a song in my home. There were two things made of leather. One was the Bible and the other was a belt. And with the Bible and the belt my father brought us up and one was King James Version.

The other was bought in Sears and but those two leather items really helped us grow up. And he said at the end I feel that what our country needs children in our country needs is a Bible and a belt. So that's discipline and instruction.

It's from the Bible discipline and instruction where they use a belt or something else we have to make sure that we don't beyond a certain age we can't use physical discipline because it's right I never would use physical discipline beyond the age of 12 or something.

And even before that only in rare occasions the the belt. And most of the times my discipline for my children was you can't play today. And playing cricket was a great thing in India. And they would have loved to go and play.

And I'd say no you're gonna lie down in bed while the others are playing. And they would come and beg me dad give me a belt and let me go and play. That was a bigger punishment to them to lie down in bed and miss the game.

So the principle is that they must something that they love to do. We must not permit them to do because they disobeyed. If they spoke rudely to mummy I tell them I don't care. What important work you're doing.

Stop it go and apologize to your mummy. We're not going to proceed before that. See you're very strict with these things. Your children will grow up properly. And then of course teach them the Word of God.

See we had school very early in the morning not yet the children had to. There's no such thing as home school in India those days. And we had to send our children to school early in the morning. So we'd say a quick prayer and send them off.

And then the only time we could do it you see I didn't want to wake them up at five o 'clock in the morning and they're all half sleepy and have family prayer. So they would get up a normal time get their books and all ready for school and just a quick prayer with them and off to school.

And then that evening when we sat around the dinner table that's the time when I took some little portion like daily light a number of verses not a big huge chapter but just a few verses speak a little bit about it.

And while we are eating talk about things like why don't we cheat in examinations. How should we deal with a boy or a girl who comes to fight with us in school and practical things in school. What do you find if you find that you're very good at mathematics.

And there's a child in your school who's very poor in mathematics. Have you ever thought of sitting down with him and helping him to do that while the others are playing spend 15 minutes with him. He'll love you.

Maybe you can draw him to Christ one day. So these are the instructions. We talk about our children when we were at home together or when they play outside. I remember this happened once where our children was play outside and it's five years old or something.

And you know as you children are and they play five years old they hit one another and you go and ask them. You ask my son what happened. Son. Well he hit me first. It's usual answer is that. And so I said then did you hit him back.

Yes. But he hit me first. Okay. Well I said see he's not a Christian so we can't expect him to live by Christian principles. You're a Christian you can't behave like that. You can't hit him back. So now we got to go to his house and apologize to him.

And he said dad will he apologize to me. I said I'm not interested. I only want to know whether you'll do it. So we go to his house knock at the door and the father opens and says. I say sir my son wants to say something to your little five-year-old.

Both are the same age. So my son I'm sorry for what I did. And the other five-year-old magnanimously says thank you. And they close the door and I say fine. And my son says daddy he never apologized to me.

I said never mind. We are children of God. I don't know where that boy is today but I doubt whether he's following the Lord if his parents brought him up like that. My children are all following the Lord.

Discipline little things like this not always the belt teaching them to obey respect. The elders in the church always speak respectfully. We have a lot of beggars coming to our gates in India begging for money very frequently.

Knock knock and say give us some money because they're so poor they don't have food to eat. And many people from inside the house and say get out go away. So I tell my children never speak to a beggar like that.

He's a man made in the image of God. The Bible says that in James that every person is made in the image of God. I mean his circumstances have made him poor by God's mercy we are not in that condition.

So if you ever spoke rudely to one of them I'd say listen. You run after him and go up to him to that beggar and say sorry sir for talking to you like that please forgive me. That is what we must teach our children.

Respect. It doesn't matter whether the person is a poor homeless person or a wealthy person. It's no difference in God's eyes. You teach your children the value of humanity respect for older people irrespective of their position in life.

And I tell you your children will grow up to respect. I used to tell them don't ever gang up with students who are you know speaking evil about the teachers. No get out of their company. Don't air your views there and get into a conflict with them.

Just pull out of their company and go somewhere else. And I'm very thankful for these little instructions that God enabled me to give them bring them up in the discipline the others the instruction of the Lord.

I was very keen that before my children left home they should have read through the Bible. I gave them a living Bible easier to read. Or even if they don't understand it all they don't understand it all.

But I knew that my children will leave home by the time they're 18 to go to college like it'll be with many of your children. And before that they must be born again. They must be baptized and they must have some understanding of the Bible even if they didn't read every page.

It's the fundamental teachings. They should have at least read through the New Testament. And they must know the teachings in the church. So it's not enough to leave it to the Sunday school to do it. It's the parents responsibility to bring up the children in the ways of the Lord.

So that is the responsibility of fathers discipline and instruction. And here is a promise. Many promises in the Bible have got a condition attached to it and the condition is for example seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness promise all your earthly needs will be added to you.

And we should be living testimonies to that at the end of our life. I longed you know when I left the Navy people in my fellow officers in the Navy thought I was crazy to leave such a good job to go out into an unknown future.

And one of the things we decided in our churches was none of us would receive a salary. We would all work like the Apostle Paul earning our own living and supporting ourselves and never taking a salary from any church.

And that's how I've lived for 47 years. And that's how all my fellow 150 elders in all our hundred churches have lived. They don't take a salary from anyone. They work support themselves and lead the churches because that's how Paul taught us.

And that's we never send reports of our work. None of you ever got ever got a report from us about our work in India. Even if you go to the CFC India website which is the Bangalore website you'll think that is the only one church in India because we don't advertise there where all our other churches are.

We do not advertise our work. We do not beg for money. We do not. In fact if you go to our financial policy website you'll get some amazing revelations there. In fact we discourage people from giving if you're not born again if you're not settled matters with others Jesus said go and ask forgiveness and then come and bring your offering.

We emphasize all that if you have not forgiven others please don't put money in the offering box. God won't accept it. And if you have personal needs please take care of your family needs. God is a millionaire billionaire father.

He doesn't want his poor children to starve by giving money for his work. So we put things like that and then say at the end of it all if you still feel you want to give give with a cheerful heart. Otherwise don't give.

And there's no percentage and give us unto God. God we our father is God. We have no lack. That is what we proclaim on our church website. But our children must grow up with these values. And what will happen.

The Promise of Training Children in the Lord

Here is the condition. Proverbs 22 verse 6. Proverbs 22 6 train up a child. That is the commandment in the way you want him to go or the way he should go which you hear in the church. That's your responsibility.

Parents train up a child the way should go and when he or she is old God's promise he will not depart from it. Proverbs 22 6 condition with the promise. Sometimes you see an advertisement in a magazine or on the internet.

Here is a free offer. If you fulfill this condition we offer you come and take a free card to get something from Chick-fil-a or something like that. You fulfill that condition. You can be absolutely certain they'll mail you that card.

You think God won't keep his promise. You train up a child in the way he should go. God says I'll make sure when he's old he or she will not depart from it. They may go through a little up and down phase when they're in their early teens and early 20s.

But by the time they come to about 30 years old they are following the Lord Moses. Father mother did it single-handedly. Her husband was at work as a slave 6 in the morning till 9 at night. Single-handedly she brought up his child.

Moses just up to the age of 8 or 9 sent him to Pharaoh's Palace the most wicked place on the face of the earth. And when he was 40 years old he did not go astray from the way his mother taught him. Mothers have a big responsibility because they are at home most of the time.

So take that promise from the Lord. And I believe God can fulfill it. And it is God's will that all our children become a testimony for the Lord. And Paul wrote to Timothy. This is what he wrote in second Timothy in chapter 2.

And think of a father saying this to his son. He says second Timothy chapter 2. You my son Timothy. Paul treated him like a son. You my son. You first of all be strong in the grace that is in Christ Jesus.

This is a father writing to his son whatever you heard from me my son entrust it to others. That means teach your children. That is the grandchildren what I taught you. And they will teach the next generation.

The great-grandchildren. Amazing. Paul had a concern for son grandson great-grandson. That's how we must bring up our children. To teach them to bring up their children. Well and they must teach their children to bring up their children.

Well that's how the Word of God goes from generation to generation to generation. But what do we see. Unfortunately I've been in around Christendom in all denominations most of them in India and in many countries.

And I'm sad to say that the children of pastors and preachers are among the worst examples in these churches. They just take advantage of the fact my dad's a leader and nobody's going to question us. It's terrible the state of affairs.

And according to second one Timothy three such a guy is not fit to be a pastor. He's not fit to be a leader. You should resign. I told the Lord that when I was preaching I started preaching before I was married.

And once we had children I said Lord if one of my children go astray I have four sons. If one of them go astray I will stop preaching. What do I have to preach. I had four children at home. I didn't bring them up properly.

What can I tell other people. I can only get up and say brothers pray for me. I've been a failure. Please pray for my children. That's all I can say and sit down. But very very few Christians take that seriously.

Their children are wayward. They grow up marry ungodly women and men and it seems okay. What to do. They're on their way to hell and their lifestyle is leading other people to hell. Well the least you can do is fall on your face before God and say Lord have mercy on us.

We've failed you. Can you at least say that to God. I've counseled people whose children are gone astray and these unfortunately the parents came to the Lord at an age when the children had already gone astray.

They were grown up and left home. And I've told them God always gives hope. I said don't give up hope. There's hope. If you promise one thing do do one thing that I ask you to do every day. You both of you husband and wife get rid of all your quarrels with each other.

Stop fighting with each other and settle things with God and with each other and live in peace with each other and kneel down and pray. God will not listen to your prayer. If you don't live in peace with each other don't even waste time praying.

If you're fighting and quarreling go and do something else. But if you have settled matters and kneel down and pray five minutes a day. That's all I'm asking you. I said you both of you pray though everything settled between both of you and pray specifically for each child by name the one who's gone astray and say Lord acknowledge your fault Lord.

I'm sorry we failed you. We did not take these things seriously. We didn't hear about it. But we don't blame them. We had the Bible with us. You know whenever people say we didn't hear that in our church I say can you read English.

Do you have a Bible. Who are you blaming the pastor. You got a Bible at home. You didn't read it. Why in the world you're blaming somebody else. Did you get your children educated. Did you teach them ABC and multiplication and division.

You taught them all that. And you did not teach them. The most important thing in life fall before your face. Never mind. There's still hope. Fall before your face before God five minutes every day and say Lord we have failed.

Forgive us. We did not know. And I give them a promise. And the promise for all those who have failed is Acts 17 and verse 30. It's my favorite verse for all those who made a mess of their life because God.

Jesus came for sinners. He did not come for the righteous. He did not come for those who live perfect lives. Jesus came for those who made a mess of their life. Did you hear that. When he said I have come to call sinners to repentance not the righteous.

I'm saying Jesus did not come to call the righteous. He came to call sinners to repentance. The Pharisees self-righteous people. He never went for them. Here is the promise the last part of Acts 17 30.

Sorry. The full verse Acts 17 30. God has now overlooked ignored forgiven the times of your ignorance. But now he's telling you to repent. Can you do that. God says your times of ignorance. I overlook.

I forgive. I blot out. Don't think about it. Don't waste your time mourning over it. You confessed it to me. I've forgiven. I've overlooked it. Now look towards the future and repent. Repent means I turn around and try to do it better now not just say I'm sorry.

Contact your children. I tell them show them some love. Don't be. Don't preach to them. Just love them. Draw them to yourself and through you. You can draw them slowly to Christ if you pray for them. It's like I say throwing a you know out in Texas.

I think they have lassos. Put a lasso around and caught catch a cattle or something. I've only heard about it and then they pull it in. I said prayer is like a lasso. You put around that guy's neck and he's got it.

He'll run a little because there's a slack in the rope. And they'll go for some time while you're praying. But one day they'll come to the end of it. They can't go anymore. And then you just pull them in and they'll come right in.

I say you take me at my word and tell me if it doesn't work. But you may have to pray for a few years before you see it. But God will answer your prayer. He is overlooking the times of your ignorance.

But he says now repent. But if you're too lazy to spend even five minutes a day in prayer for that. Or if you're too stubborn to ask forgiveness from each other then forget it. Your children will go to hell.

And perhaps you may go there too. So you don't want that. See when we have family get-togethers. I have four sons and 17 grandchildren. So we parents and children once a year we come together for a family get-together like we did earlier this month.

So 27 of us stand in a circle holding hands and I say okay we're gonna sing a song. Now just two lines. Will the circle. This is a circle. Father mother children grandchildren husband grandfather grandmother.

This is a circle. It's an unbroken circle. All of us love each other. All of us love the Lord. And I say there's a song which says will the circle be unbroken in the sweet by and by. There's a better home awaiting beyond the sky.

The meaning is one day when the Lord comes. And when we meet up there there should be no gaps in the circle. In this circle all of us should still be holding hands up there in heaven. Every time we come together we sing that bring up your children.

And if you have grandchildren encourage them also in this way. Dear brothers and sisters we are living in evil days. The devil is working full-time to attack the church. And in relation to the last days you know what God says.

Turning the Hearts of Fathers to Their Children

Listen to this the book of Malachi. Malachi was the last prophet in Israel before John the Baptist. John the Baptist came in to usher the new covenant prepare preparing for it. And Malachi was God was fed up with Israel.

He was given up on Israel. And he's going to start with the church from Matthew onwards. But look at the last two words of Malachi which speaks of the final judgment. One day I'm going to send Elijah the Prophet before the great and terrible day of the Lord.

That means someone is going to come with the spirit of Elijah the Prophet in the last days. And I believe that is the church. The New Testament Church is the Elijah of the last days with a prophetic message and will come before the final judgment day of the Lord.

And what will this Elijah do. What will this New Testament Church do in preparation for the coming of the Lord the last days John the Baptist. John the Baptist came in the spirit of Elijah for the first coming of the Lord.

The New Testament Church is the Elijah that's preparing people for the second coming of the Lord. That's you and me. What are we supposed to do. We are to turn the hearts of the fathers to the children in these days.

That's what I'm trying to do. Turn the hearts of parents to their children not children to their parents. No the parents are the ones who are to set an example turn the hearts of the parents. Because in the last days the devil is going to attack families.

That's what the meaning of that verse is. The devil is going to attack families. And you got to turn the hearts of fathers to their children. And then the charts of the children will turn to their fathers.

Otherwise I will come and smite the land with a curse. The last words of the Old Testament. The last word of the Old Testament is curse. And the last warning in the Old Testament is to families. And it has to begin with fathers.

Take the responsibility as I said even if you've made mistakes in the past there is forgiveness with God that he may be feared. If you read that verse in Psalm 130 I think it is there is forgiveness with God that he we may fear him.

So let's accept that forgiveness. So bringing up children is very very important. And I would say one of the main things like everything we read in the New Testament you remember Jesus said follow me.

He didn't say listen to me. He did say that. But the more the word that came most frequently from his lips were follow me more than believe in me follow me. And Paul the Apostle dared to take up those words and said in 1 Corinthians and chapter 11 and verse 1 be followers of me as I follow Christ.

There are only two people in the entire Bible who said follow me. Not Moses not Elijah not even John the Baptist. Jesus first of all not just believe in me follow me. And the second was the Apostle Paul follow me as I follow Christ.

Is it right for a servant of God to say follow me as I follow Christ. Absolutely I believe that's my calling follow me as I follow Christ. We should be able to say that come and examine my bank account books and examine come any day surprise me by a visit in my home and come and live with me one or two days and see or see how I live or anytime surprise me anywhere anytime follow me as I follow Christ.

I'm not perfect but I'm seeking to follow Christ. That's what all of us should be able to say follow me as I follow Christ. It's like climbing a mountain. Mount Everest is 30 ,000 feet approximately. Jesus has already reached the top.

He's finished the race. He was tempted like us every step he overcame temptation and reached the top. He finished his course. And in the snow we see his footsteps in the snow. And Paul looks at those footsteps and puts his feet in those footsteps to follow Christ.

I mean he's way below maybe a thousand feet or something. It's 30 ,000 feet. He's got a long way to go. He says I'm not perfect. I'm pressing on but I forget how what ground I've covered. I'm pressing on towards perfection.

That's what he said. And now we are still further down with Paul is at a thousand feet. Maybe some of us are at a hundred feet or two hundred feet. But we see Paul's footsteps in the snow as well. So that's what I mean by I follow Paul as he followed Christ.

And my footsteps are there in the snow. I must tell people behind me follow me as I'm following Paul and Christ. It's a perfectly scriptural advice to give to others. If you are seeking to follow in the footsteps of Jesus that should be the what parents say.

Most parents are saying hey listen son don't follow me. Follow what the Bible says. No wonder they go astray. We are to lead by example. And if you are not leading by example then woe unto you because your hands the blood of your children is in your hands.

It's worse than murdering them sending them to hell. I'll tell you this. It is worse than murdering your children to raise children and to send them to hell. Terrible. And what. A lot of children of believing parents have gone to hell and in hell.