Physicians of No Value — B.B. Caldwell

Christ’s Paradoxical Way of Salvation

We are 2 ,000 years of learning the teachings of Christ. He never said anything that made any sense and He never did anything that made any sense. He said the way up was down. The way to live was to die.

The way to be rich is to give away what you've got. And the way to be wise is to be a fool. In the Old Testament, every time that God delivered Israel, He did it with foolishness. There wasn't a lick of sense in the thing that God did.

Two million Israelites following one Baptist preacher out of Egypt. That is the craziest thing I've ever heard about. Now you know Moses was a Baptist preacher. He wouldn't abandon, he wouldn't burn. Never a man like Moses.

I suffered tonight with two of the very saints of the Lord. While I was reclining, they were rethinking. They said, Mr. Caldwell, where are we? I said, we are at the end and one of two things is soon to take place.

Revival, Removal, and the Tribulation

Here's a battleground where the theologians differ. First there is revival or a removal. We cannot continue. God must give the church of revival a remover. And if He removes the church, then of course somebody would take the church's place.

And the only somebody that could be would be Israel. I have a hard time accepting that. I am of a belief and a bend that God is going to give a revival and then a removal. The church was born in revival.

I believe she will take off of the revival when she leaves. But I believe one purpose of a revival is to enable us to write the tribulation. See I thought we'd be taken out. I used to preach that. And I would wax strong and shout while I preached it.

Woke up to find out that I might be mistaken enough to shout out at me. You know you have more liberty preaching what isn't so. And you do preaching what is so. The Lord said His coming back would be as it was in the days of Noah.

And in the days of Lot. You have two judgments and two great men. Noah writes the flood. Or as I can see is the tribulation. Noah writes that thing. But if you wasn't worrying about tribulation then you don't need to worry about it.

You get in the coming of the revival. Noah wrote the tribulation. And Lot is a picture of the end. Same day that Lot left Sodom the fire fell. You have one the entrance and the other removal. Or as I can see at present.

That seems to be God's eschological view. But I stand before God to change any time. And I get more light to walk in it. As you must do the same. But I'm saying that might be the way it is. And Noah had a revival.

He couldn't have built that ark without God. I just said he won't quit God. That's revival. And he builds an ark that all hell can sink. And he wrote that thing. And the revival and the ark was lifted up with the water.

The same water that saved Noah from the world. This thing as I said also. Mighty movement of God in the earth. Now I believe that to be it. And if it is. Then how are we going to move toward this thing I'm talking about.

We're going to have to get a group of people. That will come and stay with God till it takes place. Now let me share this with you. When I left from the university. Called out just out the edge of the city.

They said we need a revival. I said I'm sure of that. But how could you have a revival if you haven't? I said what are you going to do? I said I'm going to preach on the Holy Ghost when he comes. And then we'll have a revival.

We're going to do it on Wednesday night. So that you folks that don't want to come can stay at home. And I don't want nobody to come. If you can stay at home. If you can stay at home I want you to do it.

But if you can't stay at home. You just got to come. You just have to come if you have to crawl. I want you to come. The rest of the folks want to stay at home. And we preached on Wednesday night six months on the Holy Ghost.

And he came. And when he came he took over. And the mighty movement of God took place. And lasted eight solid years. There never was anything like it. Then of course when the heaven moved all hell moved.

And that equipped us for the moving. Now I am convinced that the only way any church. Any group can have what I am talking about. Is get God's man. He doesn't have to be a big shot. He can be a little shot.

He's got God. And start preaching and praying. Until God moves. That's the only remedy for this church. The only remedy for any church. Well I said a few days ago. Do you believe in a weekend revival?

I said yes. The weekend may end. Now brethren. It's alright to preach a few days. But there's no such a thing as that. We've got to come to grips with God. And there can be no filling of the Spirit. Without you absolutely selling out to Jesus Christ, lots, dog, pan and everything.

And there can be no revival without the filling of the Spirit. And so I want you to be in prayer about this matter. Our next meeting is in Chattanooga. Post-Tartar Sunday morning. But I don't have to do anything but obey God.

And we should be praying about it. And wait on the Lord. And if He wants something beyond tonight. He is well able to do it. We rest tomorrow night. Well I'm killing me? No, no. You don't kill what God's in.

You can't even wound it. I believe that God is God. And your battle is let God be God. That's the biggest battle you've got is let God be God. Now He is God. But now you talk about a battle. Let God be God.

And that's the only way it can take place. So we'll pray and we'll look up. And we'll wait on the Lord. I was talking with one of your pastors here in Atlanta. Your friend and my friend. Talking about a meeting.

I said, my brother. The only way to do this thing is to have a starting date and no stopping. The start set aside everything. Oh Lord God. If we're where I think we are. Then you take over. We've made a mess out of this thing.

Nobody but God can get us out. Alright. On several occasions Paul would say, I want you to bow with me in my folly. Monday night. I brought a message on binding the strong man. In that message. We exposed all of this intellectual ministry.

Demon Warfare and the Filling of the Spirit

And the minister of the false prophets. They cast out devils. Without binding the strong man. And those devils come and get back in. That's what's been happening for 50 years. And so we're here. Only thing, that thing to do is get people demon possessed.

Then you've got more church members demon possessed than you have ever dreamed of. Tuesday night we brought a message on the filling of the spirit. God's equipment for demon warfare. You better not move toward this matter of demon warfare.

Without the filling of the spirit and wholly yield it to God. Because if you do, those demons will get you. They're fragile. They're powerful. They have supernatural strength. Wednesday night we brought a message on the grace of God.

We saw what grace was. Why we need it. Last night we brought a message on Saul. And the witch of Enver. And we saw that Saul's outstanding sin. He committed 5 sins. Only dealt with 3 of them. Had to eliminate 2 of them because of time and the weakness of my body.

He committed 5 sins. And 5 is the number of grace. And one of the outstanding sins he committed was that he ignored the whole principle of grace. Grace means God does everything. You just receive it. Grace means God's everything and you're nothing.

Grace means first sin abounded. Grace does much more abound. So we have ignored the principles of grace and got our gimmicks. Our gadgets. And everything under God's high heaven to solve our problems.

And to try to get somebody to come here and preach instead of preaching the grace of God. And we've had it. Now tonight I bring the final message on physicians of no value. All quack doctors. Tonight the message will expose every false prophet.

Every false system. Every false supposed to be so in this. Going to expose them. Laying fire before God. And that's the only way we'll ever get anywhere. Is to expose this spurious, frivolous, fruitless ministry today.

False Evangelism and Man-Made Church Growth

About 40 years ago we decided that poor old God had gone off on a vacation. Had gone fishing. It was all freezing the stars somewhere. And they'd come and forgot us. Churches after the first world war.

They all went in debt. Had to have somebody's help pay our debt. And so God wasn't saving people's lives enough. So we got out here to hoodwink these fellows and bring them in. And you didn't do that.

You didn't want to save. You didn't want to save. You wanted to join the church to help pay that debt. And I was at Myers Hill College. They enlisted me to be one of the speakers. Raising money for this $75 million campaign.

I said I'll help you to raise the money. But why didn't you spend it? What are you going to do with it? We're going to China, Japan and educate the Chinese. I said no sir. That's contrary to scriptures.

The only person you're going to educate is that man that gets right with God. Paul said if a man be ignorant, let him be ignorant. Now you're violating scriptures. That's what the Bible said. You have no business educating the devil.

We go over there and get them converted. Let them build their own schools. Oh no, that's not the right approach. I said well I won't help you raise it and I'll preach against you. And I did. They raised the money.

Little of it was left. This man here in Atlanta got through with it. They went to Chinaman, China and built Shanghai University. Cost $2 million. Who's got it now? The communists. Communists have got it.

They paid no attention to Nixon over that. Not that. Because he'd be afraid to mention. Now ladies and gentlemen listen. When you violate the principle of grace and this book you're in trouble. That's Satan.

And the only way out is to fight your way out. And so I'm ready to fight. I'm used to it. I've done nothing but fight for 45 long years. And I'm ready to continue fighting. I'll write so much for that folly.

Job 13 and the Charge Against Worthless Physicians

I want you to turn to the book of Job chapter 13. Job chapter 13. I want you to put a ring around verse 4. I want you to study it the rest of your life. Job chapter 13 verse 4. And before I read, may I thank you for your love offering.

Kind of you. Thank you for this church and your dear pastor. And all of the members of the church and all the visitors. We're grateful for you. And God, if you come to see us, come back to see us and we'll be good to you.

Job chapter 13 verse 4. But ye are forgers of lies. Forgers of lies. Ye are all physicians of no value. Underscore. Physicians of no value. Anything in the world that I have no use for is an old quack doctor.

If I got sick, that's all I'd know. That I'm sick, that's all I'd know. If I secured the services of a physician, I'd hate to turn my body into the hands of an old quack doctor. The next person that's contemptible to me is a quack lawyer.

If I bought a piece of property, I've got a title for it, but it may not be any good. And if I put my life's earnings and holdings into a piece of property, I'd like to know that I had a fair title for it.

Get an old shyster lawyer. An old crooked lawyer. That would either deliberately steal my estate or let somebody else steal it. And I'd pay him for it when I did it. Anybody in the world that I have no use for is an old quack preacher.

Anybody in this world ought to be a man that knows his business. He ought to be God's man. You can lose your body and get it back in the resurrection. But if you lose your soul, you won't get that back in the resurrection.

That's gone forever. If I lost my home, I could work out some more money and buy another home. But I've just got one soul. Oh, listen, I've just got one soul. And I don't want to lose it. And I don't want to be shot a curve by some physician of no value.

These little damn judges, thinking, tell them I've got a soul. They can accuse me anytime they want to. Supposed to be soul winners. They're hoodlums. Everything they're doing is contrary to the word of God.

I believe in soul saving. I don't believe in soul winning because that's humanistic suffering. You're appealing to a man's intellect when you do that. You're trying to get some poor devil to make a decision.

That has to do with the mind. Nowhere in the Bible did God ever tell you to make a decision. Nowhere in the Bible has God ever promised to save anybody. Salvation is not a promise, it's a gift. I give unto them eternal life and they shall never perish.

Ladies and gentlemen, we're coming tonight to look at physicians of no value. At this day and hour, we've made a zoo out of a sheepfold. We're trying to have a revival with a bunch of monkeys, rhinoceros, lions, tigers, elephants.

Everything's in there. You get up to go to preach, I don't believe that, I don't believe that. How do you know you don't? You don't know what I'm saying. How do you know whether you believe it or not?

Unless you're in where the shades of love lie deep, you won't know what I'm saying. And if you're born again, the Holy Ghost can tell you what I'm saying. See, God never reveals truth to nobody but babes.

There is no other, no. Just babes, that's all there can be getting the truth. Matthew 11, 25 said that Jesus stood and lifted up his eyes and he said, Father, I thank Thee that Thou hast hid these things from the wise and the prudent and hast revealed them unto whom to babes.

That's the only kind of person that ever gets any truth. And they have to be revelated to them at that time. He hides the gospel from one group and reveals it to another. Now whether you like it or not, that's what it says.

And the thing that's scaring me to death at this hour is God hiding truth from America. Oh my God, I've got the weak terminals. We've had the gospel almost 300 years and we spit in God's face and we let these physicians of no value sell us down the river.

Here we are. These long-deaded, peck-a-witted, supposed-to-be denominations of leaders have sold us down the river. They've sold our churches, our denominations, everything down the river. And while we poor old ignorant church members feed that bunch of buzzards to rob our people of their faith, they keep moving on.

They're physicians of no value. I don't think you ought to say that, maybe not. But I've said it and I'm too close to heaven for you to scare me. Now ladies and gentlemen, listen to me tonight and hear me and hear me well.

The only way that we're going to get the job done today is for God's prophets to come on the scene and cry aloud, God I inspire not, it cannot happen any other way. And I've told God, if you use me, that I was a candidate.

He may use me, I hope he does. If he doesn't, I said, God take me on, I'm not taking up in here. Now if God can't use you, why not take you on to heaven? Why leave you here? If you're not going to be developed and not be used of God, then why not the Lord just take you on?

Physicians of no value. Now, in order for you to see this text, I must deal with the context. I want to take a bird's eye view of the book of Job and see just who this is talking about. I want to point out three things before I say what I'm going to say.

Job’s Bankruptcy, Sickness, and Friends

First, I want to point out to you that there's three things about Job I want you to see. Three things about Job let us look at. First is the bankruptcy of Job. God bankrupted his name in order to let him see truth.

And if God has to burn up your home, put some of your loved ones in a graveyard, He has to take your job, your health, whatever it takes, God may do it, in order to bring you to see truth. We have the bankruptcy of Job.

Second thing, we have the sickness of Job. There is Job, sick, smitten with sore balls from the top of his head to the bottom of his feet. He couldn't comb his hair, he couldn't wash his face because of the balls in his hair, in his face.

He's sick, bad sick. And the third thing we see about Job is Job's three friends. And that's what he's saying here. But ye are forgers of lies. Ye are all physicians of no value. Now you listen to me.

There is a man that's looking these bunch of hoodlums, these goober heads in the face, and tell them what they are. You're forgers of lies. You're physicians of no value. In the book of Job, they heard that Job was sick.

And they came and sat and looked at him for seven days and nights, never opened their mouth. Man already sick, about to die, waiting to go to hell. And this bunch of hoodlums come and sit and look at him for seven days and nights.

Had it been me, I'd have got a chair and hung over their head. You bunch of devils, get out of here. Come and sit and look at me, me already sick for seven days and seven nights. But when they did so, they began to analyze poor Job's situation.

There's a man that was a multimillionaire, went bankrupt overnight. There's a man that's sick, and lift up his head to the mother they speak. He's sick. God will let the devil touch him to make him sick.

His poor wife, she turned him into an infidel. Said, first go to die. Go ahead and commit suicide and get out of it. That's not the only preacher that had trouble with his wife, but old Job had trouble with his wife.

Go ahead and commit suicide and get out of it. Chances are she wanted her little uptight fellow to get rid of this old man and get him out of the picture. But he looked her in the face and said, you're the foolish woman that ever walked in the face of God's queen.

He said, we receive good at God's hand and we receive bad at God's hand. Now who's going to believe that? You listen to me, you don't believe that. The only thing we believe is we receive good at God's hand.

But he hears a man not converted. I have more sense than the ordinary Baptist today. We're going to look at him anyway. Said, we receive good at God's hand and we receive bad at God's hand. And that's so.

Oh, listen to me, listen to me. These three friends are going to interpret Job's situation. He's bad sick. They're going to analyze it. Dissect it and put him in the test tube and see if they can find out.

One of them said, I know what's wrong with Job, he's got sin in his life. Mm-hmm. Yeah. See, Bob McCurry had a wreck. That's because he had sin in his life. You keep on fooling around, gobbling up and out on your head and take your tongue to beat out.

That might be so, it might not be so. Might be that God is bringing Bob McCurry through the deeps in order to bring him out and land him. Who knows? Who knows? The next one of the three friends said, I tell you, old Job's a hypocrite.

He's a hypocrite. That's what's wrong with him. He's a hypocrite. And the third friend said, no, sir. He doesn't have sin in his life, he's not a hypocrite. I'll tell you what the trouble is. He's serving God for what he can get out of it.

And now God's taking away his money, he's going to turn back on God. Now here you have these three shysters. Look at them. Three soul ones. Look at them. They've analyzed this man's situation, trying to get the old man Job to make a decision.

Now if you don't believe it, you read the book of Job. They're trying to get him to do something instead of trying the Almighty God. Ladies and gentlemen, there has never been a now like this hour. There is the second thing about what we want to see.

Job’s True Condition and the Failure of False Counsel

And the second thing is what was wrong with Job. How there's something wrong. There's no question about that. But the thing is, who is going to be a true physician and analyze the case and diagnose the case and find out what's wrong.

So you can write a prescription. If a doctor came and examined me, I don't want him to examine me. And I don't want him to write me a prescription. He finds out what's wrong with me. And if he doesn't, give me some dope pills.

About 90 of the pills are dope pills. That'll do me just as much good because of working on the mind anyhow. Well, I'll go home and throw away my pills. That might be the best thing that ever happened to you.

What was wrong with Job? There's dead certain something's wrong with him. How come God could take away his wealth? He was a multimillionaire. How come God could take away his health? He was a strong man, never sick a day in his life.

How come God could kill seven of those fine young men he had buried them in one grave? What's the matter? Seven fine young men, killed. Right there. Buried them in one grave. That is at one time. There's something wrong.

God's closing in on this man. And God is running the show. Talk about the devil. Quit spitting in God's face. The devil couldn't touch Job. And they come to Job, come to God and got permission to touch him.

The devil couldn't kill a kid. The devil couldn't touch one of his seven sons without permission to do so. But when God turns this thing loose, he's after you. And what you need is another position of no value.

Some of these shites, these hoodlums coming around here, trying to diagnose your case when they don't know what they're doing. What was wrong with Job? There's three things wrong with Job. First, he was one of the elect fallen into the pitfalls of Phariseeism.

Now you write that down. One of God's elect fallen into the pitfalls of Phariseeism. I have a sermon I preach on the pitfalls of Phariseeism. I'm certain I couldn't enter it tonight, but enough to tell you this.

Phariseeism is separation without the Holy Ghost. It's truth without God. It's heaven without hell. It's faith without repentance. Listen to me tonight, ladies and gentlemen. Job was one of God's elect.

He was caught in the pitfalls of Phariseeism. That was what was wrong with Jonah. He was a Hebrew. God said, Jonah, I want you to go to the inn of Bartholomew and preach the preaching that I teach you.

Walk the street barefooted. Moses had to take off his shoes for abusing. Joshua had to take off his shoes for abusing. And you've got to take your shoes off and walk up and down the street barefooted and spring the judgments of God.

He said, I ain't going. Well, the reason he didn't want to go was because he was caught in the pitfalls of Phariseeism. The time he spent three days and nights in hell, in the belly of the whale, old guy stick juices all in his eyes and all in his mouth and all over him.

That's what it looked like. Old man Job, he messed up too. God said, Jonah, don't you put a looking thing here. God said, look at you in the belly of the whale. The guy stick juices all in your eyes and your ears.

You're in a mess. Isaiah was caught in the pitfalls of Phariseeism. He said that the year the king of Israel died, I saw the Lord. When he saw the Lord, then he would be saved. By God, he saw himself.

Isaiah chapter 6. But in Isaiah chapter 5, you have five rules. Listen to Isaiah, where he got sanctified and filled with the Holy Ghost. Woe is you. Woe is you. Woe is you. But my God, when he saw himself, he said, woe is me.

Now until we come back and see the principles of grace, we are finished. Brethren, woe is me. When you see that God owes you nothing but hell, pay your penitent. And that God's sovereign, he does as he pleases, when he pleases, and how he pleases, and whom he pleases.

Brethren, that will whittle you down and put you where you ought to be. There was another thing that was wrong with Job. He had fallen into the hands of physicians of no value. He had a poor man sick.

He couldn't run. He couldn't go nowhere. He lost all of his money, and he couldn't take a vacation. And what's this? Poor man had all his business. Wife returned, got him emptied out. Chances are she wouldn't cook him nothing to eat because she wanted him to die and get him out of the picture.

My old husband's got sick. Money's all gone. They've got no Social Security. What do they do? I just hope you die. If I was you, I'd just curse God and die. Ladies and gentlemen, he not only had fallen into the hands of his wife, all brainwashed to the powers of hell, but had fallen into the hands of these crack doctors, physicians of no value.

But this old man held on to his integrity because he had sense enough to know that he was that sick. And he knew that there was no sin in his life. He knew he was not a hypocrite. And he knew he wasn't serving God for like another.

He knew that. And yet he could not make the argument of these three friends. There were three Baptist preachers. Three hoodlums, three soulless. All three of them had a demon dwelling in them. And they began to shoot this old man.

And you read the whole book of Job. It's all a battleground. Intellectual battleground. Between the powers of hell and the powers of heaven. Here is a sick man. Got to fight his way through hell and high water moving through on this thing.

So that's enough to be over this old man. All right. Now, not only that, here's the third thing wrong with old man Job. Not only falling into the hands of physicians of no value, crack doctors, but he's fallen into the hands of ignorant soulless.

They're trying to get this old man to make a decision. Ladies and gentlemen, if you don't believe it, you read the book of Job. And if it don't scare the devil out of you, I'll pay for mine. We have never seen the purpose of the book of Job.

The book of Job is not the sanctification of a saint, but the conversion of a sinner. Well, I didn't know that, but I'm going to show you tonight, in a minute. If you'll stay with me, and don't pull the shade down.

Jesus’ Warning About Proselytizing

Here are these ignorant soulless. And you know, the Jews had always done that. Matthew chapter 23, and in verse 15, will you listen to it? Jesus said, Woe unto you, scribes, pharisees, what? Hypocrites, that's what excuse old man Job.

Woe unto you, that word, woe, means judgment without remedy. Woe unto you, scribes, pharisees, hypocrites. For you come from sea and land to make one proselyte to win one's soul. And when he is made, you make him.

God never had to send anyone to do it, you make him. You get these poor devils to make a decision, then they'll argue their way to hell over some doctrine. Listen, listen. You can't get them converted hardly, because they absolutely been brainwashed.

For you come from sea and land. That's great big territorial, sea and land. How much is that income? Well, there's seven seas in the world, and a lot of land. You come from sea and land to make one proselyte.

You talk about energy. You talk about zeal. Oh my God. To make one proselyte. And when he is made, you made him what? You made him the twofold more child of hell than yourself. You're going to hell and taking all your converts to hell with you.

You're listening, aren't you? Matthew chapter 22, our Lord deals with that same truth again. Are you listening? He gives us the picture of an end-time evangelism. He said, go and bid them to come to the wedding.

You go bid them. Oh, what would they do? Instead of bidding them, that's an invitation. That's all any man's got. I preach the word of God, and the word of God is my invitation. That's all. I cannot go beyond what's written, and I dare not stop short of what's written.

I must not diminish a word. He said, you go bid. You go bid. What did they do? They went and gathered. All right, they gathered both good and bad. See, that's what you do in this gathering stuff. They went and gathered both good and bad.

King came in, saw a man without a wedding garment on him. That's one of these fellows who doesn't make a decision. That is certain. Said, how did you get in here? I said, them hoodlums got me to make a decision in my own hair.

I'm just as naked as you are. Just as naked as a man. I was sitting there, man without a wedding garment on. And you know what the Lord did. I preached this out in Nevada, Missouri, and that preacher left that service that night.

He was a graduate of Louisville Seminary. He left that service that night and locked himself in the room and prayed all night long. My God, he came out the next morning with a converted man. Come and told his wife, he said, it would be good for me, Your Honor, that I was thinking of running that man, Caldwell, out of his way to do it.

But he said, they nailed me last night. You know what they nailed him with. Now they nail every preacher with it. You read Matthew 22 and verse 13. He said to those soul winners, bind him hand and foot and put him in hell.

You put him in hell. You talk about hell and the judgment. When these goober-headed preachers have to put their converts in hell, brother, oh my God, if that don't shake you. And I told that preacher, I said, all these fellows that you've helped link, God will make a decision.

Get them in here to build your little kingdom. You've got them in here to help pay your debt. I said, God's going to make you put them in hell. May put you in hell with them, I don't know. No wonder that shook the devil out of that preacher.

Shake the devil out of any man. It's right there in the book. Now, you put him in hell. Such servants. The word is true. Means preachers. You put him in hell. Bind him hand and foot and put him in hell and out of darkness.

There shall be wailing and gnashing of teeth. Chapter 23 goes a little further into that very truth. Question number three. What did Job need? He needed something. Ain't no question about that. But what did he need?

Job’s Need for Revelation, Repentance, and New Birth

Well, he needed four things. First, he needed a revelation. He needed a revelation. When you come to chapter 39, looks like that old man Job is going to go to hell in spite of all that God can do. Chapter 39, it says, God answered Job out of a whirlwind.

The three friends was unable to beat this old man down. He could argue the horns off of a billy goat. God asked Job a hundred and one questions. You ought to read those questions. A hundred and one questions.

And Job couldn't answer one of them. He found out he was not near as smart as he thought he was. Question number one. Job, where was I? Where was you when I laid the foundations of the earth? God, where was you?

And I made the sun, moon and stars. Where was you, son? You ought to read the other hundred questions, by the way, in time. Job needed a revelation. When you come to chapter 42, Job said, I've heard of thee by the hearing of the air.

Them goober-headed soul-men has told me something. But they didn't give me a revelation. I can't do that. You'll hear me tonight. You can't be saved without a revelation. How are you going to trust an unrevealed Christ?

Only the Holy Ghost can reveal Christ to you. Job needed a revelation. He said, I've heard of thee by the hearing of the air. But now, man, I see it thee. My God, I've seen the King of Job. I've seen the Lord.

And when he saw the Lord, he saw himself. No longer saw himself. Job was tainted with Phariseeism. Chapter 29. Fifty-nine times he used the word I. I was I to the blind. I was this. I was that. I was that.