3 Stir Me to Give — Helen Roseveare

I lived 20 years in Africa and we don't do anything without object lessons because we reckon you forget everything we tell you. But you see something that you remember. But I gather that you've all had a rather unfair advantage over me.

You know more about me than I know about myself because I Walked into my bedroom a little earlier on this evening to get changed. I had a fit I thought I'd walked into the wrong person's bedroom. I backed out hastily.

There's someone in there. Then I only found it was a large picture of me which Gathered that there's one story you weren't told during the biography. Perhaps there are a few others as well, but One little anecdote you didn't know was that although I'd been 30 years a doctor I still faint at the sight of blood and somebody asked me a couple of evenings ago.

Well, what do you do when you operate? I said I always close my eyes for the first incision. Certainly after the privilege of listening to mr. Davis this morning and again, mr. Dunlap this afternoon. On feels a little bit small, but they both told me I wasn't to feel like that I mean didn't tell me personally though told all of us We weren't feel like that.

We were both they both said we were to be what we are not what somebody else is. So. But I'm certainly not them. I Would like to turn us to read for a moment from Exodus chapter 35. Exodus 35 when Moses came down from the Mountain having received from God the vision of how to form and create the tabernacle and He wanted to call all the children of Israel into the job.

Israel’s Offering for the Tabernacle

You want everybody in on it that they're all got to have their part in making the tabernacle. And I believe in the same way today. I believe God would call all his children everyone everywhere who knows and loves Jesus in on this task of creating the Tabernacle of God not made with hands the bringing in of every tribe and nation and tongue throughout the world Into his church and that we've all got to get in on this.

There's nothing to do with age groups. I was going to do with linguistic abilities or any of the other things. We sometimes make us excuses. I Want to speak a little more tomorrow night about this funny thing people say well I haven't really had a missionary call.

I always feel tempted so I'm glad you haven't. It's not scriptural. We'll touch on that one tomorrow. X to 35 verse 4 Moses said to all the congregation of the people of Israel. This is the thing which the Lord has commanded.

Take from among you an offering to the Lord. Whoever is of a generous heart Let him bring the Lord's offering gold silver and bronze blue and purple and scarlet stuff and Fine-twined linen. I guess by then half his congregation had switched off because that's all the stuff the wealthy would have and there weren't many Wealthy with them walking through the deserts and the trouble with so many meetings.

I guess this isn't really true here tonight is it's once a missionary start talking folks switch off because well, you know. It's not for us. It's all right for them. So then to be sure they were all in on it.

He said. And Goats hair. End of verse 6. You didn't need her doing the goat. You would go around and gather the goats hair off the thorn bushes. Off the brambles and bring it in. You didn't have to be tall to reach up above.

The goats were short. It was all down below. Anybody could do it and bring it in. Tan ram skins goat skins acacia wood. This was the ordinary shitting wood the wood that lay around the place. They didn't even have to cut it down.

It was driftwood. All they had to do is to bring it in. They've got no excuses left. They were all to be in on this job that Moses wanted done. Oil for the light spices the anointing oil and for the fragrant incest onyx stones stones for setting.

For the ephod and for the breast piece that every able man among you come and make all that the Lord has commanded. Verse 20. Then all the congregation of the people of Israel Departed from the presence of Moses and they came.

Everyone whose heart stirred him. And everyone whose spirit moved him and brought the Lord's offering to be used for the tender meeting. For all its service holy garments, so they came men women and children all over of a willing heart.

And brought to the Lord their offering. Thirty years ago. I had the joy of coming to know the Lord Jesus Christ as my own personal Savior as a freshman in pre-med school and the sheer overwhelming joy.

It's just to be unbelievable of knowing that Jesus Christ God's Son so loved me that he died for me not just for all the world. But for me this was to me so tremendous. I remember that night going to bed and trying to thank God for this Overwhelming joy that had flooded my heart that he loved me.

He cared he knew and saying to him, please God if you can possibly find it in your will to do it. Would you give me the privilege of letting me be a missionary and I've never known anything else. I still rather wonder how you get converted and don't become missionaries because.

Well, it seems obvious and automatic. Well six months seven months after that. I was the big meeting in the north of our country of England the Keswick Convention. And on the last day of the Keswick Convention the big Friday missionary meeting with over a hundred others I stood to signify that I would go anywhere that God sent me and we were singing a hymn.

The Prayer to Be Stirred

And the first verse of it goes Stir me. Oh Stir me Lord. I care not how but stir my heart in passion for the world stir me to give to go but most to pray stir till the blood-red banner be unfurled or lands that still in heathen darkness lie or Deserts where no cross is lifted high.

And I really meant it. I remember after the meeting going up into the mountains in the Lake District to have it out with God and I said to God Okay, I do mean it today today. I want you to go and stir me.

I don't care what it costs I don't care how it's going to be stir me God. Stir me right through to making me what you want to make of me. But I said to God, you know, I guess I knew myself fairly. Well, I said God I shall feel like this tomorrow when you begin to do it and it begins to hurt I begin to draw back say please God hands off.

I've had enough. I've had all I can stick. God don't listen to me when I say stop. Remember that today I said go and I Guess that's what he's been doing ever since well six years ago Easter 1970 we had a rather dramatic or Traumatic week at the college where I teach in Northeast Zaire.

Where I've been had the privilege of helping with the training of national medical evangelists we've gone back after the rebellion in 1966 to total devastation and destruction and we started in to build a new college and We just finished putting up the first building it was the biggest building I'd ever had the privilege of helping to put up and we'd got it complete with the classrooms laboratory the nurses arts classroom the auditorium.

Everything was the basic building was finished. There's a lot of work still to be done on it. We're going to have it dedicated to the Lord's service at the annual meeting of the Board of Directors very posh name for a very humble meeting of missionaries and church pastors and we were suddenly told that Quite outside their control the meeting had had to be moved forwards by three weeks.

So instead of having four weeks to get ready for it. We'd only one week left. Well, that may be bad enough in this country, but you try doing that in Africa. It's absolutely devastating. We only have two speeds in Africa slow and stop and if you put When you put them into shock, it's all stop and it was just it's fantastic.

Sacrificial Work Under Pressure in Africa

So we really got down to it. We started school that week at 6 in the morning instead of 630. We cut out the lunch and break we Cut out breakfast break. We cut luncheon down by half an hour. I confiscated the football and at 230 all the world got down to work and anybody who knew how to do anything.

We got all the local carpenters going to make us chairs for the assembly hall and as soon as they arrived one boy was given 10 chairs to sandpaper and Another boy got on varnishing them. We just hope they were dry before the board sat on them and Two boys said to me they knew something about painting so I gave them much bigger than this.

I gave them a large gallon pot of white Hard gloss paint and a couple of brushes and I sent them off to paint the woodwork that had been already prepared around the doors and the windows and the Blackboard frames in the classrooms.

I then went off to see that other people were doing their jobs. We had to clear out the brick rubble. We planted flowers one great joy of living on the equator. We planted canna lilies on the Wednesday and they were flowering on Saturday for opening day.

You couldn't do that and Well, the moment came. I went to see how my prize painters were getting on and I moved into classroom one. And they weren't there and I was rather surprised. I moved into classroom two and they weren't there and I was not any surprised.

I was now suspicious. I Moved into classroom three and they are my two prize painters. They were singing. They're chatting. They're enjoying life. They were going in and out of the paint pot. They're going up and down the woodwork and absolutely nothing was happening.

They didn't seem to notice it and I touched the woodwork of the doorframe as I walked in and there was a sort of brown sticky goo. I Moved across to them. I looked over their shoulders as they were working and they are halfway down the paint pot was a solid white mass of paint and all the precious linseed oil had gone.

I Gave them a lecture on stirring. I went to get another pot of paint rather devastating in Africa. We'd had to send for our 12 tins of paint down to Kinshasa. That's a little bit further than going from here to Winnipeg.

It had taken five months to come and when it did come there were only seven pots left. Five had been stolen. I got out another precious pot and demonstrated to them stirring. It's quite hard work. You've got to go right down to the bottom.

You've got to keep going until all the solid stuff at the bottom is stirred in. There's been nothing left at the bottom that's hard. It's quite tough stuff and you've got to keep on at it little by little it will change color.

The brown linseed oil will work its way in and it will become white and now when you paint with it It'll do the job. It was meant to do won't go so far. But the woodwork will change and it will do the purpose.

And so once again having demonstrated carefully that you keep going you keep going. It's no good being impatient. It's no good thinking you'll get there quickly, which of course also I want to do on a demonstration and that You stir right through the bottom.

Now when you paint you'll find that it has changed color. And now when you finally put it onto the board the board will change color, too. And now the paint does what it was meant to do. This of course doesn't.

I haven't stirred enough. I promised I wouldn't make a mess up here. I better stop. I went off to see the other workmen and After a bit, I suddenly thought I forgot to tell you had to keep on stirring.

It's no good stirring just once you have to keep on at this job or it settles out again. I went back to see them sure enough paint was settling out color was changing going back to being brown. They hadn't spotted that.

Next morning being at heart a teacher I took the matter up in Bible study at 6 o 'clock in the morning and I gave a Bible study on The matter of stirring quite scripturally quite scripturally. Peter has it in 2 Peter 1 13 as long as I am with you I think it's right to stir you up.

Explain that I think God wants to do it every single one of us. He wants to stir right through. Not just a superficial he wants to stir right through to the bottom of everything you are of everything I am.

And doesn't matter about age group background upbringing or anything. He wants to get hold of us and stir us till we are one consistency. There won't be any division between Sunday and Monday through Saturday.

I remember once Coming down the valleys in South Wales. I've been out preaching on a Sunday night. It's about 10 o 'clock at night and I had to be on duty in the hospital at 1030. I hadn't noticed I was in a speed limit because I've blown down by a police cop.

I terribly ashamed. Yeah, I was coming back from preaching the gospel. But I'm mostly ashamed because it was Sunday you wouldn't have wanted me to be on Monday. I've been different then. Well It's getting this thing right through so there isn't any separation between so-called religious and so-called secular that will become one.

One consistency for Jesus. Anything we touch will show Jesus. Everything will say will show Jesus. It'll be just one paint and we've got to keep on at this stirring. It's no good doing it once. It has to be done every single day.

It has done every hour of every day. So one consistency keeps going to be Jesus only all the way through then you do what he means to do. I remember the end of prayers that day one of the senior students closed the meeting in prayer in French rather haltingly with the government language and they're not at all fluent at it and he prayed something like this go on God Stir me.

I don't care what it costs and there's a long pause then a great rush. He said I do care what it costs. I care a lot. It cost God, but never mind stir me all the same. Well, there it is. I wonder how many of us are willing to pray that prayer through the rest of this conference.

Go on God Stir me. I don't care what it costs. And even if I do care what it costs God, never mind stir me all the same right the way through. And it'll touch everything. It will touch our pocketbooks.

Giving More Than Money

Yes, but much much more than that the hymn writer there in the third line said stir me to give to go. But most to pray and God willing what I would like to try and do is to think tonight on the stir me to give.

Tomorrow night God willing to stir me to go and Friday night stir me to pray on these three different aspects of it and on this aspect of stir me to give. You can say surely a mission isn't going to stand up there and talk about giving.

Why not. That's just because you think about cash didn't say cash didn't mention cash. I don't think the him right of thinking of cash. It's turn me to give everything. I am Lord stir me to give myself my talents my time my ambition.

It'll include cash. Parents it'll include children. Everything stir me till I'm willing to give the whole lot stir me to give myself so utterly to you God. You can do what you want where you want? I just will give one story on this money business as to get it out of the way.

Because you know we're on the other end of it you lot may do the giving we do the receiving. It's terribly exciting our end of the story. Sometimes of course we fail you because we don't write home and tell you enough detail as to just what has happened.

You must forgive us. It's true that some of us do tend to work about 24 hours a day seven days of the week and let us seem to get squashed out. But I think of one day. I hadn't been out in Africa very long back in 1953.

When I got out there, I was devastated our mission works in a region. Well, I suppose it's about a quarter of the size of your province, but anyway big enough. We have half a million people today about one and a half million people.

We've treble our population and I was the only mission doctor and You know I'd gone out there full of all enthusiasm all I was going to do. But the ink was hardly dry on my general practitioners diploma and overnight no rat race in Africa.

I was a senior chief consultant of everything from pediatrics to geriatrics and everything in between. But it's a terrifying moment you suddenly realizes no one to ask advice of no one to get help from and then it came.

I arrived on Tuesday night. Wednesday morning I did my first clinic. It's unbelievable they have poured in I guess that first morning about 150. Poured in they're all mums carrying crying babies and dragging laughing children and all the mums were talking the noise the smell the heat.

The frustration. I didn't understand a word they talked and they didn't understand a word I talked and in the end we got so desperate that if they rubbed their heads I gave them aspirins if they rubbed their tummies.

I gave them Epsom salts. The came the moment when I just couldn't stand anymore. I just thought God I can't I can't. I just can't go on if I could just get 10 minutes myself I can get my thoughts straight again.

So I went over to my home to get a cup of coffee. They are just get away from them all for a few minutes and get peace with God again. I'll go back and face some more of it when I got to my house this particular day.

This is after I've been out there about five months, I guess. There was a man an African and his wife and two little boys on the veranda. I didn't want to see anybody at that moment. I just wanted to get away from them all.

So we went through the usual courtesies and then I thought he'd go away, but he didn't he just stood there. Asked him what he wanted. We said I want work. Oh, it's great relief. I said, well, I'm not an employer you want to go over to that man on the other side there that house there.

He does all the employment. No, he says I want work from you. I Hesitated so what sort of work? Well, he says I'm a cook. I've been cooking for missionaries for 18 years. He fortunately did not say he'd been cooking missionaries 18 years.

So I Asked him why I'd left his last employer. I thought if he's got a reputation for burning the cakes I didn't want him so he didn't answer me in dead silence. He rolled up the left sleeve of his shirt looking straight at me.

There the top of his arm was the mark of leprosy. I don't know God Wasn't that I minded treating leprosy patients wasn't that that mean just one more clinic in those days. Leprosy patients were treated separately.

You couldn't have them in the public clinic. There's been another two hours into my title I thought so mean of God. He must know I was overworked. I couldn't put any more into my timetable and I said no God.

You know if you start arguing with God about treating leprosy patients as we would say in England you're on a losing wicket. They happen to be his favorites. So anyway, I said well God If I did treat him, I couldn't have in my house cooking for me.

Whatever would my mother say? She knew I got a leprosy patient cooking for me. I Think all that God said to me was she doesn't need to know. So he came into my home and cooked for me and we built him a home outside mine.

And then we built a new little clinic place. And meanwhile, we sent off to kiss and Ghani 450 miles away for the drugs we would need and the equipment the day came when the big box arrived and we opened it together and he was all excited and pounced on the drugs and the bandages and I pulled out the inevitable bill.

Well, it's written in Belgian Congo francs and the bottom of the column it said the total was Four thousand three hundred and twenty Belgian Congo francs, that would be about sixty five dollars fifty cents.

Well, I didn't have fifty cents available in my sixty five dollars and I said to God well, this is your affair. Anyway, I didn't want to treat leprosy patient. So it's up to you. You can pay and I Just pushed the bill in my Bible well the end of the month came and the rule in the mission was that all bills had to be paid by the end of the month.

And there was no money available at all. There's not anything even that I could borrow from there just was no money available and I went to work that last morning of the month. Puzzled I felt God had been mean I mean what sixty five dollars the Lord nothing out there in Africa.

That was the price of one cow and God says all the cows on thousand hills are his. I felt he could have given me one but There wasn't anything available at all. And I was I was bitter in my heart. I felt God had failed me and let me down.

And anyway, it's his affair when I went back at midday to lunch. My cook was there all excited. Please doctor come quickly come quickly. There's a brown envelope on your plate. We both knew where the brown envelopes came from the office.

Well, he said another missionary brought it across very sorry went to his house yesterday. He hadn't noticed it should have been for you. So he sent it over to you so together we opened the precious brown envelope and shook out its contents and Ansel pounced on the money and started to count the money and I took the piece of paper and the bottom of the piece of paper the total was Four thousand eight hundred Belgian francs.

I did the math quickly. I'd be four hundred and eighty francs the tie that left four thousand three hundred and twenty Belgian francs it was the exact amount. I guess if I'd been a bit more polite to God and a bit more believing he'd have sent a bit extra for pocket money.

But there you are. But and you know, then I saw up above that gift was made up of three gifts. There was a gift from a couple in North America whom I've never met. There's a gift from a couple in North Ireland who since become closed prayer partners and as a gift from a Sunday school group in the south of England.

Some of those gifts may have been on the way anything four months five months going through all the different bank exchanges. From America to England from England to Belgium Belgium to Congo. Congo up country and every time goes through a bank exchange.

They take a bit more off and yet when it arrived and the three were put together. And you know that two of those gifts it actually wrote against them. This is for your leprosy work and four months before I didn't have a leprosy work.

I didn't intend having a leprosy work, but he knew that's the other end of this money business. It is exciting to be in the giving business because you just don't know what God's going to do with it. And it is thrilling because it isn't only cash is talking about its things.

I remember I'd been out there about three years. I was called out one night to the maternity. We worked hard, but despite everything we could do the woman died in childbirth and I was left with a little tiny premature baby and a little two-year-old girl orphaned by the death of her mother.

I Said to the puber midwives our biggest problem is going to be to in order to keep this baby alive. It's to keep it at a steady temperature. We've no incubator out there with no electricity. I said all right.

The one nurse went out to get the boxes. We put the babies in and the cotton wool we wrap them in. Another midwife went out to fill a hot water bottle. Another one stoked up the fire. One of them came back in so I'm awfully sorry doctor I boiled the kettle.

I took the hot water bottle. I poured the water into the kettle and suddenly Burst hot water bottle and she said it's the last hot water bottle. You have a saying which says it's no good crying of a spilt milk.

Well enough to be my soul say it's no good crying of a burst hot water bottles. They don't grow on trees and no drugstores down the road to buy another. Is there all right to put the baby as near to the fire as you reasonably can?

Sleep between the baby in the door your job is to see it does not get into draft. Next day at midday I was having prayers with our orphan children at midday any of the children who wanted to gather around for prayer time as I did.

Every day I gave them various different things to pray for and amongst the prayer requests I told of this tiny premature baby and how difficult we were going to find keep the baby alive. I mentioned the burst hot water bottle.

I told him with a little two-year-old girly who was crying because her mummy had died. During prayer time one of the children a ten-year-old girl Naomi took the matter up in prayer in the usual very blunt way of Our African kiddies, please God send us a hot water bottle be no good tomorrow.

God baby will be dead. Please send it this afternoon. And then she added and while you're about it God would you send a doll for the little girl? So she'll know you really love her. As always my problem with the children's prayers was could I really say amen?

I didn't honestly believe God could do it. Oh, I know God can do everything. I love that him. We've been singing in God at the impossible. Of course, it's super but I mean there are limits aren't there?

I mean you didn't really see there wasn't impossible to cope with that one. And you know, I've been out there three years I'd never had a parcel. They just don't come and a male only came every now and again when somebody happened to be coming the right direction and Anyway, if anybody from my home country did send me a parcel who would put a hot water bottle in.

I live on the equator. Well midway through the afternoon I was teaching in the nurses training school and somebody came across and said there's a car outside your house doctor. I went across by time. I got there the car had gone there on the veranda was a large 22-pound parcel all done up with string and United Kingdom stamps.

I Think I felt the tears then I felt I couldn't open it alone. I sent the orphan kiddies and we opened it together. On the top there lots of lovely bright knitted vests that they love. I was throwing them out of their eyes lit up and just praying please God.

There must be enough vests to go around everybody. Then there were knitted bandages for leprosy patients. They looked a bit bored. Then there's a large bar of soap and they look more bored and Then there's a nice packet of mixed fruits Sultanas and currants and raisins and their eyes lit up that would make a nice batch of cookies for the weekend.

And then I pulled out the brand new rubber hot water bottle. I cried. Naomi was in the front row. The children she rushed forward said if God sent the bottle He must have sent the doll and she dived into the past with both hands and she pulled out the dolly from the bottom.

She'd never doubted. She has looked up at me bright eyes, please mommy. Can I go over with you to the maternity to give this doll to that little girl? So she'll know that Jesus really loves her. That parcel was on the way five months.

Five months before God had constrained a Sunday school group to put a parcel together. Some Sunday school teacher to put in a hot water bottle even for the equator. Some child in England to put in a doll.

For a little one out in Africa because God wanted to answer a child's prayer that afternoon. I tell you he's some God is me and this is it if you'll let him stir you in this giving business. So you get in alongside of this sort of giving giving of our money?

Yes giving of our things. But it's not only that giving of time. I remember a day not so very long ago to my shame. It'd be one of those days. I don't know if you ever get them, but I've been called about half past one in the morning to go down to the operating room.

And I'd operated for this woman things didn't go just according to plan. So I stayed and sat with her for about two hours. It was just coming up to dawn by the time I got home wasn't worth going back to bed.

Made a cup of coffee. I got my Bible out and I got ready for the new day. I Went down to school at 629 and the students arrived at 631. I considered they were late they considered they weren't late and I grumbled and they growled and that's how it started.

That day off and it just got from bad to worse about 11 o 'clock in the morning. Someone came and passed a note through the window of the classroom where I was teaching. You can always hear my students suck in their breath.

They know the doctor hates to be disturbed while lecturing and I opened a little note is from the head man of our village. Who'd gone down that morning in the school truck down to the local markets to buy food stores for the college for the week?

And just a quick sharp note, please come at once. My new Barcelona would never send me if it wasn't urgent. Well, he got the truck down there so I had to borrow someone's bicycle and We live in the foothills of the ruins or in mountains and every road is a switchback and it never seems matter which way I'm cycling.

It's always the hilliest way and It was midday sunshine in the tropics the time. I reached the marketplace. I felt like it and Down there. There's a fairly ugly scene the man. The chauffeur of the truck was a Mabudo from a northern tribe.

The man said he'd been hit with a more hammer from a southern tribe and I had a group of angry Mabudo's and a group of angry more hammers. Fortunately, I knew a little of each language and could move in between them and little by little sort the thing out.

But time was going by the time I eventually got everything sorted out and got the truck and everything else got back to school. I'd lost two lectures and those had to be made up in an already over full timetable in the evening.

We had a staff meeting. Oh, I trust your staff meetings are always all they ought to be. I'll sometimes are but that particular night I wanted to put something through quickly urgently and I don't know what it is when I want to do something quickly and urgently.

But all my staff gets suspicious. And so they want every detail given out why why why all down the line and I think they're pig-headed and they think I'm stubborn well. But time I got to bed that night at 10 o 'clock.

I was feeling pretty ashamed of myself. I was telling God I was sorry. I'd made a pretty good mess of the day. I just hadn't been any witness for him and things hadn't gone as they should have gone. I went out to the back of my house and lit the primer stove to put on some milk.

Then I went out behind to get a bucket of water to have a bath. Came into the house and as I came in through the back door. On the front door. Oh, no God. No more. Thanks, and I turned the storm lantern right down low.

I stood dead still. I thought they'll think there's no one here. They'll go away. But it didn't work after a few moments I Turned the milk out on the private stove. I put down the bucket of water. I walked from the back to the front of the house I just trying to pray please God.

You better take over and see this person whoever it is because I'm just not in a mood to see anybody else today. And when I got there and outside of the senior student obviously in distress. And I'd come in got us both drinks of chocolate and we sat there and little by little he began to open up.

In the early hours of the morning he accepted the Lord Jesus Christ as his Savior. How nearly I'd missed. Always I'm telling you one of the stories when I didn't miss once heartaches to think how often one did miss.

Giving All of Our Time

I'd given God 21 hours of that day, and I thought it was enough. He wanted 24. He wants us to give him all we've got all our time every bit is his. To do with just what he wants and where he wants. We haven't any choice in this and it's not only time.

It's our love my caring. Love takes time doesn't it. You can't become friends with anybody. I was brought to the Lord Jesus Christ. Through a student at university who gave up her time to befriend me.

She did it to a lot of others that particular year 14 students in our college came to know the Lord Jesus Christ. Really through that girl's friendship how she ever got her degree nobody ever knows. That was God's gracious goodness on top of the rest, but dear Doc she was amazing.

She gave herself, but it takes time it takes being involved where he's loving somebody caring for somebody listening to what they've got to say to you instead of like me always wanted to be on the talking end and It's this.

Being able to enter into what the other person needs to share with you. It's this level of giving myself in love. I remember during the rebellion I Had a little African girl Phoebe. I'd always said I wouldn't do this you know I was that is a sort of sentimental thing that single lady missionaries do they Adopt African kids like not me.

Thanks, but you know of course it happened. I went from work one day and they're lying on the veranda this little tiny Scrap crying in a dirty cloth, and I took it at that stage into my house to give it a drink of milk.

I then closed. Changed his dirty clothes and found out it's a little girl and then on she worked her way into my heart and came into my home and Phoebe grew up with me. Well Phoebe was 10 when the rebellion came.

And the first time I was taken captive during the night Phoebe just woke next morning and found that mummy was missing pretty shocking to a 10 year old I Got back, and I was with her again for another two weeks.