Don't Let Pain Define You — Shane Idleman

The title of the message this morning is Don't Let Pain Define You. Don't Let Pain Define You, and we've been in a series entitled When You. When You. Jesus said when you fast, when you pray, when you give.

And he also said when you are offended. Here's what to do. And I would have to say that this is probably one of the most important issues in churches today, is it not? We've all been hurt many times over.

We've all been offended. Our emotions can ruffle our feathers. Our emotions can get bent out of shape. And there's things that are legitimate, there's a legitimate pain. I'm not going to ignore that, but there are some things that we kind of just need to, what's that old saying?

Water on a duck's, water over a duck's back. You know, the feather just, have you ever seen a duck go in the water? It doesn't even look like it's wet anymore. How did that happen? Because it's designed.

And some things we just need to let go. Because if we left a church, or got disgruntled every time we got hurt, how many churches would we have been to? Right, I mean, we, I would probably be on church number 1 ,000.

Right, because we have feelings, we get hurt. And I want to talk about that a little bit, because Jesus said when you are wounded, when you are hurt, when you are offended, here's what to do. But let me set the tone for this before I get into that.

There is legitimate pain, but most offenses in the church need to be released. They just need to be released. Okay, I was hurt, I was offended, I'm releasing that. I'm not going to hold onto that. Because it's the little things that eventually spoil the big things.

The little foxes, right, that spoil the vine. It's those little foxes that get in there and start to eat the grapes. We're worried about a big, huge famine, or a big grizzly bear. But it's the little things that come in and begin to fester and build.

So, biblically speaking, we're just called to release those things. And when we don't release them, we are really showing people how prideful we are. Because a humble person, preaching to myself, by the way, this morning, in case you're wondering.

But a humble person, I've noticed, and biblically speaking, they release. They just release it, that was hurt. I mean, if we look, you want a model? King Herod wanted to kill Jesus. All the religious leaders mocked him, ridiculed him, spit in his face, beat him before his execution.

The city who said, Hosanna, one day, said, crucify him the next. And all his disciples, he invested all his time into forsook him and fled. Now, if anybody has a right to be upset, shouldn't Jesus be?

But yet, in his humility, he allowed these things, and those things are big. He allowed those things to go. And I'm assuming most of you want to grow in your walk with the Lord, right? Even the balcony, I'm talking to you guys this morning, too.

It's hard to see you up there sometimes. But we all wanna grow in our walk with the Lord, right? We wanna mature, we wanna get closer to God, and this area will stifle spiritual growth. Because the enemy, one of his main targets, I believe, is pride and also using offenses against us.

So if I get hurt, well, I'm gonna hold this in, and when I see that person, I'm gonna treat them accordingly. And I'm gonna hold onto this anger, I'm gonna hold onto this bitterness, and I'm gonna come and worship the Lord this morning.

And I got through it, and I saw them, but I avoided them. And then next week, this person hurt. And then you're just a mess of being, you avoid places, you don't come to church, you do it all because of offenses.

Romans 12, 16, live in harmony with one another. Do not be haughty, but associate with the lowly, the humble. So it's our goal to live in harmony with one another. And in order to do that, we have to let things go.

We just have to let things go. And we let things go in our family, right? Well, that's different. Not really. The church is a body of believers. We consider this family, that's why we call it, we have a Westside Christian family page on Facebook.

For those who are members here, we connect. It's family, how does family resolve conflict? How would a family handle this? Well, that's different. No, it's not. According to scripture, we are a family.

Actually, it can be tighter than our normal family. Have you ever felt closer to believers than sometimes your immediate family? Why is that? Because it's the unity of the Spirit bringing us together.

So it begs the question I often ask, how can the Holy Spirit and you stay at odds with the Holy Spirit and someone else? Have you ever thought about that? If two believers have a conflict, the Holy Spirit's not, there's no conflict with the Holy Spirit.

The Holy Spirit's not divided. The Holy Spirit and me and the Holy Spirit and the other person, the Holy Spirit's not going, yeah, Shane, you show them who's right. You just, you put up that wall, you just tear them apart.

Yeah, let's go fight, let's go fight. The Holy Spirit is crying unity. The Holy Spirit is saying, would you humble yourself and be united with the other brother, sister, and unity? And then when that unity comes together, it's the Holy Spirit working in two believers.

So when there is division that can't be reconciled, it's not the Holy Spirit who's at odds. It's not God who's causing this. It's something called the flesh and the carnal nature. That's why the Bible says just let it go.

Some things, some things can't. I'm gonna hopefully get to that. So I'm gonna just give you a few examples so you know what I'm talking about. Over the years of planning of church, I've came up with a huge list, but I'm not gonna go over everything.

A lot of people have left by now. Actually, this doesn't apply to anybody that goes here anymore. But I know it's hard to believe, but I've offended people. Why is everybody laughing? That's, right? That's hard to believe.

The sermons offend. Now, maybe it's a good point of clarification. The truth will offend. There's not a thing I can do about that. But our attitudes shouldn't. The way we come across shouldn't offend.

The truth will offend, but the attitude should not. Now, the church, West Side Christian Fellowship, has offended people. They have left. I'm just gonna throw down a few reasons so you know what I'm talking about.

I don't mean to demean. Obviously, sometimes it takes two to tangle, right? It takes both having, both parties have to admit, you know, I could've did that better. We could've handled that differently.

So I try to find some things where I think this was just a clear offense on one side, and the church really did nothing at all. One incident came up when somebody stopped being an usher. Once we said, hey, can you consider wearing the gray shirts so people know who you are, they can ask you questions?

I'm like, I'm not having a church tell me what to do. Oh, well, okay. I didn't realize this is a big deal, and so they're not here anymore. Another person was wearing flip-flops, you know, just tacky, and said, hey, we'd like, you know, if you're representing, you're greeting people, is there a way to just, I don't know, kind of not wear flip-flops, and especially if you need a pedicure, and is that a manicure?

I don't know what, but I didn't say that, but you're thinking, right, it's presentation, and that's, you want to kind of, you don't look like you just got out of the bed and showered, and he took the application and tossed it back, and I'm sitting here, well, I'm glad you're leaving anyway, because that kind of attitude, who can work with that?

See, that's not even the right, so some of these things come out so you can see what spirit they are of. When a vessel is struck, what's inside spills out. One of the best ways you can indicate, or get an indication of a heart is to tell a person, no.

You know what, not at this time. Do they throw a fit, or are they humbly supportive? Okay, no problem, I understand, and you see how people act by when they're challenged. When a person says, and I shared this video from Paul Washer on our Facebook page on fasting, he was so right.

When a person says, for example, oh, I'm so sorry, I got angry, I lashed out, I don't know what came over me. Well, that's actually, it's not what came over, that's actually who you already are. It's comfort and convenience, and when things are going our way, that we're nice.

But you take away some comfort, convenience, and some self-centeredness, and you begin to get to the real issues, the real person will come out. Oh gosh, I lost my temper, I don't know what came over me.

No, that's what's already inside of you. We just provided fertile ground for that to flourish. So these are little things, and they turn into big issues. This one was many years ago, before this church, Randy might remember, we were at a different church in Lancaster, they rented an auditorium for services, and I ran into a guy, and I said, hey, I haven't seen you in a few months, what's going on?

I haven't seen your church. He goes, well, he told me I couldn't bring coffee into the auditorium. Okay, and that's why you're leaving church? Well, yeah, I enjoy my coffee, and just, I go, well, do you know it's used as a school gym the next day?

And that's, I mean, I leave there going, Lord, what is wrong with people? I mean, are we that selfish and immature? God, help us. People have left because they weren't greeted, or weren't invited to a birthday party, or just these little things and offenses.

Now, I'm not minimizing them, because all of these things are a little hard to hear, right? Somebody said, hey, Shane, can you wear nicer shoes? You know, or can you dress a little bit more? Oh, it hurts a little bit, right?

Hey, can you not bring coffee in? We just remodel, we don't want to spill anything. It hurts a little bit, okay? But then mature believers move on from that. I mean, some of these things, if we brought these up to Paul, I wonder what he would say.

You're what? We don't forsake the coming together, unless, really, biblically speaking, unless there is a departure from sound doctrine, unless there is sin that is going unchecked and unaccounted for, and the church is not addressing sin, they're letting people do whatever they want, and there's this lukewarm approach, there's no reason, really, to leave a church, or leave a fellowship.

Granted, there are exceptions. If you're at a place and it's just dead, you feel like you're in a cemetery, worship is dead, the preaching is dead, the fire of God is gone, then you have an obligation to feed your family somewhere where God is moving in a powerful way.

So there are, obviously, exceptions to this. But many times, I think God wants us to stay grounded and grow if we're only leaving because of an offense. Because it begs the question, with that as a setting, how do you grow if you always run?

Reconciliation as a Mark of Christian Maturity

Me too, just since we're being honest this morning. When we were at a church in 2005, 2006, we would probably go twice a month. And when I would go, where have you been? Why aren't you coming? I don't want to hear that.

So I'm not gonna see you again for two more weeks. Right? Or as I'm growing in my walk and these guys are kind of upsetting me a little bit, it's kind of hard, I don't want to see them this week. I don't want to see them next week.

I don't want to go to church. And we can get caught in this cycle of allowing hurt and offenses. And I finally realized, you know what? It doesn't matter what the other person did. It doesn't matter how right I am or wrong they are.

It doesn't matter. I'm called to remove offenses from my own life. I'm actually called to be the peacemaker. This is very easy to figure out if you're wondering, well, they should or you should or you should.

God always puts it back on us, the ownership back on us. As much as it depends upon you, live at peace with all men. You go and you work that out. That actually is a sign of maturity. When two people don't want to talk and just stay distant and disgruntled, that's a sign of two immature believers.

Somebody's got to put on their big boy pants, right? Is that okay to say? Is it okay? I'll save it for the next. Somebody's got to grow up, grow up and reconcile. Then you're the more mature person. You're the one that God's favor is on.

You're the one that God is going to bless. You're the one that is living in harmony with Christian principles because you're going. If the other person is not receptive, guess what, you're off the hook.

They're not. God will deal with them because restoration isn't always restoration. Restoration is just a matter of forgiveness sometimes. I forgive, I release. Doesn't mean restoration's going to occur.

It just means that forgiveness has taken place in my heart. So the greatest lesson I want to give you this morning is don't let pain define you. Don't let pain define you. Define your destiny, will it not?

Because if we live in pain mode, because the church has hurt me. Christians have hurt me. And I'm not talking this church recently. I mean years ago. The church, Christians hurt me. And I've hurt people.

And we allow that pain to sometimes define us and determines our destiny. When God says release it. How you handle pain will affect every area of your life. How you handle this topic will affect every area of your life, right?

And the walls we build to protect us eventually imprison us. Will you allow anger to stifle you? Anger in your home that you used to experience as a broken child or whatever it was. Will you allow it to continue to stifle you?

Will you allow painful experiences to push you away from God? Listen, you take the pain to God the same way a person takes a broken car to a mechanic. That's an analogy we can understand because sometimes we think I've got this pain.

I don't know what to deal with. I don't know what to do with it. You take it to God or take it to, just like you take your car to a body shop. That's better, right? And getting it repaired and built up.

You take that pain to God. Will you allow an unfair life to turn into bitterness? Will you allow teasing and critical remarks to affect your entire life? You see how pain affects you, doesn't it? Pain determines how we live.

And this is a good reminder that hurt people hurt people. Hurt people, when a person is hurt, they actually hurt others. So many times when we're dealing with somebody who's hurting us or lashing out or understand that they are hurt, they are a hurt individual.

And just like when you go, oh, what's wrong, little puppy dog? And he goes to bite you, right? Because he's tired of being kicked and kicked and kicked. So you also have to be, not only do you have to deal with the pain in your own life, you have to be that person who understands hurt people.

It'll change the way you approach them. Now, this is not an excuse, hurt people hurt people. It's a fact. Because people say, well, I've been hurt. That's why I hurt you. No, no, that's not good. It's just a fact that this is what happens.

And parents, if you walk around defeated, guess what, so were your children. If you walk around defeated and discouraged, so were your children. If you walk around and you lash out at them, they will lash out at others.

This will change your parenting, even grandparents. This will change your parenting. Because you're forming, you're shaping at this young age. You're forming and you're shaping, and that is how they're going to learn to deal with pain.

Turning Pain into Spiritual Growth

There's a movie I want to just throw out there. It's called Greater. It's the story of Brandon Bullsworth, who was possibly the greatest walk-on in history of college football. But it's interesting, at 12 years old, he was very overweight, and his coach just beat him up.

Just called him things, names, terrible remarks. Get off this field, you'll never play again. You don't deserve to play. You're terrible, you're lousy, you stink. You're never playing, and just beat him up.

And he went and he sat down, and then a high school coach came and encouraged him. I don't know the exact words, but it was something like, young man, young man, what you do, what you choose to do with what was just said to you, will determine your destiny.

In other words, will you allow that to beat you up and be defeated, or will that be the stepping stone for you to turn your entire life around? He said, you want to succeed, you will. You be the first one here on this field, you be the last one to leave.

See, pain is a wonderful stepping stone if you allow it to be. Pain, pain, if you allow it to work what the enemy intends for evil, if you allow pain to allow you to drive you to the cross, if you allow that pain to impact your worship and your prayer and your preaching, because see, it takes broken men to break men.

You think, I walk up here broken and being humbled, and God just, the pain of childhood, the pain of growing up, the pain, and God uses that pain. He takes that pain, right, out of the ashes. We sang that last week.

So let the ruins come to life in the beauty of your name, rising up from the ashes, God, forever you reign. So that's the key, look to God, look to God, because the enemy's going to use pain to discourage you and to hurt you and to keep you in submission mode and to control you.

Pain is a control mechanism, right? If we allow the enemy to get a foothold, he'll control us and tweak us with that pain. No, you won't go there, no, you won't do that, no, you won't get involved, no, and we just walk around controlled by the pain.

But if you allow the pain to point you to the cross and allow the Savior to come in and heal, then when you sing, there's weeping during the worship, because you know him as your healer. You know him as the person who set you free.

You know him as everything to you, because yes, though I've been hurt, I've got a Savior who conquered hell, death, sin, and the grave, and when victory came and death was crushed, so was my pain. So we already talked about Jesus can relate.

He knows the pain. So here's his advice, here's what he says. When you are hurt, when you are offended, Matthew 5, verse 22, Jesus said, you have heard that it was said of old, to those of old, you shall not murder.

Whoever murders will be in danger of judgment. But I say to you, so here's what's happening here. He said, you have heard from old, like it's been said, well, obviously we know from the Ten Commandments, but we know even before that, that murder is wrong.

People know that it's wrong. He said, you have heard that it was said, you shall not murder, and whoever commits a murder will be in danger of judgment, which is all true. But Jesus said, but I say to you, he's gonna go a step further, he's gonna go to the heart issue, because see, murder was acted out.

Because of the action, there's a punishment. Okay, but Jesus is going to go even deeper than the action and to the heart of what caused it. Because there's people, there can be people in this audience who you've never murdered anybody, but you would sure love to, right?

I've never went through with it, but boy, is it just brewing, and I'm thinking about, gosh, is that detected in water? If I could just, if they could just, but see, it's brewing. So he's going after the heart issue.

But I say to you that whoever is angry with his brother without a cause shall be in danger of the judgment. Now, he's not saying here, okay, he's giving anger a pass. Like, yeah, all of us can be angry because we have a cause.

He's saying at a point there, there is righteous indignation. Okay, you can be angry, right? There's righteous anger. Jesus saw that they were taking advantage of people in the temple. He was mad. When I hear, and I don't know how many of it, 44, 45 senators voted to murder a child after the fifth month.

You just hold me down for a minute here, because I might get a little loud. That is an abomination. That is murder. The nation has the blood of innocent children on her hands. Yet, we're not gonna get angry.

Christians are called to be passive. Baloney! My goodness, I'm still angry. I'm still trying to deal with it. How can we allow that? A child can stay alive at that old. And there's pictures of them giving each other high fives.

God, help us! But see, out of that anger is going to be a deeper prayer life. Out of that anger is going to be a compassion and an intercessory type prayer where you pray on behalf of these silent screams.

So there's cause. I have a cause to be angry. And I'm dealing with it. Trust me. That way. Right, I'm broken over this. Just unbelievable. Some group is upset that Trump mentioned America 80 times in his speech.

Oh, God forbid. These little babies need to grab some Kleenex and go live in a safe room somewhere because this is life. I have to stop because this is not gonna go well if I continue. So if you're angry at a brother without a cause.

So if I'm angry at people and without a cause, there's no reason. There's a judgment there. But also, God says, the Bible says, don't let anger go down. Don't let the sun go down upon your anger. Deal with it.

And this anger that I have experienced with the direction of our nation, I take it to the Lord. But every prophet I read in the Old Testament was angry about the direction of the nation. Because here's the thing.

If you're not angry about that, then you're accepting of it. Well, it doesn't bother me. It's no big deal. There's pictures of pastors going and blessing Planned Parenthood, saying this is God's work, God's blessing is on this place.

And I don't know how to throw up or hit the computer screen. I mean, how misled can you be to think that that is of God? So there is a righteous indignation. And actually, righteous indignation must rise up in order for change to take place.

William Wilberforce was so upset at the slave trade that it took him 20 years to pass something in Parliament. Three Christian men brought the Salem Witch Trials to end in the beginning of the nation.

People fought for, Martin Luther King Jr. fought for things. The abortion industry going against that, fighting for things. The sanctity of marriage between a man and a woman, fighting for that thing.

It just ticks me off every time people say, oh, you should be not involved in those kind of things. Oh, really, just be silent? And yeah, just preach the gospel. Okay, well, the gospel changes my heart.

See, that's a problem. You preach the gospel, people come to salvation, now they're mad over the things that anger God. And they say, don't do anything, don't, shh, shh, shh. Just sing Amazing Grace and be quiet.

Amazing grace, shh, that's it. Don't get upset, don't say anything. You better thank God for Christians who are standing up for the things that are right. I'm not endorsing our president, I'm not endorsing things Congress is doing, I'm just saying overall, there's righteous indignation.

But Jesus said, I say to you, if you're angry and there's no reason for it, you'll bring yourself judgment upon yourself. And whoever says to his brother, Raca, shall be in the danger of the council, but whoever says, you fool, shall be in danger of hellfire.

Raca was just derogatory. You fool, you fool, you foolish person, you idiot, we'd say today. And just this condescending, arrogant, looking down upon people, this whole thing. He says, if you do that, your heart's wrong.

Releasing Bitterness Through Forgiveness

You'll be judged as well. So if you wanna heal, let me just offer some things from Jesus' teaching. Healing comes from releasing. To be healed, you have to release it in the mind. There's a release that takes place.

And Lord, I've been wrong, I need to let this go. See, that doesn't mean that the person was right, or that what happened to you was good. It just means you're releasing the toxicity of it, right? You're getting rid of that toxic emotion.

Also, remember, reconciliation is the heart of God. It involves releasing more than restoration. Because we get so focused on restoration, right? Why isn't this fixed again? Why isn't this back to normal?

Why isn't this the way this should be? Like it used to be last year, why, why, why? That might not ever happen on this side of heaven, right? Because when damage takes place, when things are broken, God can do amazing things, but sometimes, things aren't gonna go back to the way they used to be.

Remember the good old days? That's not the goal. The goal is releasing the hurt. That's all you need to do. That's what you're responsible for. And I'm hoping next week I can get a little bit more into what this looks like practically.

But those who need to hear this the most are often the most defensive, right? Those who need to hear this the most are often the most defensive. And it'll look like this. They'll come up to me afterwards, they'll be, man, I have forgiven them.

But, hold on there, sailor. Right, that's, where's that coming from? Where's that coming from? Because see, that's not, you're saying it, but your heart's not feeling it. For out of the abundance of the heart, the mouth is going to speak.

And they get mad, and they're so angry, it's almost like, here's what they're really saying. I know what the Bible says, and I know what I'm supposed to do, but, but I've been hurt too deep. You don't know what I'm going through.

No, I don't, but God does. God does. Don't let the enemy hold you in bondage. And an angry attitude is often a sign that we are still stuck in the pain mode. So Ephesians 4 31 offers a wonderful advice as well.

Let all bitterness, wrath, anger, clamor, and evil speaking be put away from you with all malice, and be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God and Christ forgave you. This really hit me this week, because I thought, who am I to hold something in when that paid my price?

Think about it, he wasn't guilty. We were guilty. We deserve that. He took that. I deserve the wrath and condemnation of God. He absorbed it. He forgave every sin from when I was little to when I'm gonna, yeah, it's on the cross.

So now I'm going to hold onto this. Boy, they gossiped about me. I'm gonna let them have it for the next year. How foolish. How immature. That's not a mature Christian believer. But let me sum this up, paraphrase it.

He's saying here, cut out all backbiting and unwholesome talk. In other words, remove the cancer. Remove the cancer. Some of you need to hear that this morning. Remove it, just remove it. You're not gonna be perfect, I know, but you can remove it.

What physician goes in and comes back and says, hey, I got, we had surgery and got most of the tumor. I decided to leave half of it, just, you know, so you have something to remember me by. I got, you'd be like, right, what?

That's the same thing that happens in us. He's saying here, cut it out. Backbiting, unwholesome, just get rid of it and be gentle with others and sensitive to what they're going through. Forgive one another quickly as God and Christ forgave you.

Think about that, be gentle. Be gentle with others. I don't know if this is gonna be a good idea, but I'm gonna try it. I wrote this down this morning. It jumped out at me during worship this morning.

We come in at 6 .30 in the morning for worship. If you ever wanna come in and just, we just have worship on, the lights are low. Gets our hearts right. But, and I opened up, I think it was a few weeks ago about when God was convicting me about getting off of certain addictive substances like caffeine.

Right, coffee. And I would pray this all the time. Lord, I wanna be gentle with others. I wanna be sensitive. But if I'm giving my body the thing that caused me to be irritated, I can pray till the cows come home and that prayer's not gonna be answered.

So I don't know if that's for somebody, but sometimes, Lord, take this away. But if you're fueling your body with nicotine, caffeine, junk, medicine, not medicine, but wrong kind of medications, all these things.

If you're fueling your body with these things and you say, Lord, help me. I wanna be gentle. I wanna be sensitive. But we're giving ourselves things that are actually the opposite of that. That's gonna be a hard prayer to answer.

Because God will answer it. He'll answer it in our ignorance. He's done amazing things, but sometimes, he calls us to take better care of this gift he's given us. And out of that care will come sensitivity and gentleness.

But that's what we're supposed to do. Because when you're not feeling good about yourself, do you lash out, or is it just me? Right? When you're hurrying for church, spouse, and your pants aren't buttoning up, right?

The shirt's not fitting, it's a bad hair day. Are we nice and gentle and things? And say, I just don't know what came over me. See, it's already inside. So what this topic does, it gets the heart right.

Reconciliation Before Worship

And you can learn to have a bad day and go with the flow. You can be gentle and still things not go your way. And then he talks about healing involves action. Verse five, or chapter 523. Therefore, if you bring your gift to the altar, and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there before the altar and go your way.

Now, this is interesting because he's saying, we don't do that today, but they would bring an offering, they would bring a gift, they would bring something to the house of God. They would come and they would worship, right?

They would come and they would worship like we do. But they're coming to worship and they're saying, yeah, I know I've got an offense, or I know there's a broken relationship, or I know I did something wrong, but I don't care.

Jesus says, put down the gift, get your heart right, then come and worship. So I'm wondering how many of us come to worship and we still need to go fix things. I'm gonna come in here, I'm gonna worship.

Oh, isn't that a wonderful song? I hate that person though. And I'm just gonna worship and I'm just, I'm so bitter right now. I'm gonna continue gossiping when I get home. And oh, blessed be the name of the Lord.

And these, you know, and what are these songs we're singing? And oh, it's so beautiful, but I'm so hateful right now. And it hinders worship. It really does. How many people come in because what happens, I've been there, I've done that, I struggle with it too.

You come in, pride comes in, right? I'm not gonna fix this. I'm not gonna correct that. I'm gonna hold on to this offense. I don't care about what my responsibility is. They're gonna, I'm gonna make them feel that.

And then we go into worship. Week in and week out. And when Jesus said, you know what? You might as well just get the heart right first. So go first be reconciled to your brother. Then come and offer your gift in worship.

So you go to someone, you say, and guess what? Many times they might not respond like you wanted them to respond. They might not take it. You might say something and then you get off the phone and say, why didn't they say sorry too?

They should have said, they should have called me. They should have, who, and then you're all worked up again. God says, let it go. You're the right, they're in the wrong. Reconcile, get your heart right.

Then come and worship. Agree with your adversary quickly. So go to somebody who has a problem against you. Agree with them quickly while you're on the way with them lest your adversary deliver you up to the judge and the judge hand you over to the officer and you be thrown into prison.

Assuredly, I say to you, you will by no means get out of there till you have paid the last penny. Now, many people would say though, that doesn't apply to us today. Well, the situation doesn't, but the principle does.

What he's saying here is, makes complete sense. You wanna be right, they wanna be right. Okay, let's push, let's push, let's push, let's push. Let's take it to the judge and see. So who's, let's, I'll show you, I'll show you.

Pride comes in, let's go. Come on, let's go take it to the judge. The judge says, you're in the wrong. Now you've gotta pay, you've gotta go to jail or whatever it is, and you, what happened? You should've just agreed with them and say, listen, I don't know what happened here, but whatever you think is best, let's work this out.

We don't need to go there. You humble yourself, and God doesn't turn away the humble. What does he do? I resist the proud, but I give grace to the humble. You humble yourself, you agree with them, you avoid the attorney, you avoid the judge, you avoid the jail time.

So to apply, says, because we'll go, we go up and we'll say, I'm gonna prove that I'm right. I'm gonna show them I'm right. I'm gonna keep fighting this. I'm gonna keep being in contention, have a contentious attitude with this person.

He says, no, go to your adversary. So healing comes from initiating. Isn't it interesting? He never says, just wait, your adversary will come to you. Pray and fast, and your adversary will come to you.