Families - Part 1 — Phil Beach Jr.

Let's again bow our hearts before the Lord and invite the presence of the Lord to be with us. Father, we thank you for who you are. We acknowledge that you are our King and our Lord. We welcome you into our midst.

We welcome your Holy Spirit to be in our hearts. We welcome your Son as our Savior in our midst. We pray that you will open the eyes of our hearts and shine light from the face of Jesus Christ. And with this light, enable us to see the beauty of who you are.

And may we be transformed into that lovely image. We commit this time into your hands. In the wonderful name of Jesus.

Amen and Amen.

It is a pleasure to be here with you today. I am very thankful to the Lord Jesus and His wonderful grace. Just a brief testimony. I was born a sinner, lost. As a young man, I went my own way and got involved in many hurtful and sinful things.

But over 30 years ago, Jesus revealed His love and His grace to me. And He changed my heart and gave me a desire to know Him and to love Him. And so I come to you today in His grace and in His strength.

I have nothing to offer except the Lord Jesus Christ. What we'll do is have a time of study in the Word of God. And then afterwards, we'll have a time of question and answer. And so there will be plenty of time for us to interact and then we can close our meeting.

And you who have other responsibilities tonight, you'll be on time. I would like to invite everyone, if you have your Bibles, to open them to Genesis chapter 1. Turn your Bibles to Genesis chapter 1. You can read the first two verses of Genesis chapter 1.

The Triune God as the Source and Model of Family

Yes, you can read now. In order to understand the immense significance of family, we have to go all the way back. Now let's look at these few verses and we'll see how important this is. In the Scripture, when the Bible says, in the beginning, God, the word God there is the Hebrew word Elohim.

This word Elohim occurs over 2600 times in the Old Testament. This word Elohim, interestingly, is a plural word. And the reason why the Holy Spirit chose this word is because it reveals the triune God.

One God, but reveals himself as Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. Father, Son, and Holy Spirit enjoy perfect fellowship for all eternity. Father, Son, and Holy Spirit possess perfect family for all eternity.

So, when the Scripture says God, Elohim, it is referring to the triune God and his desire to create. Now, when God wants to create as Elohim, it's because he wants to demonstrate in his creation the harmony and perfection of what he possesses in himself.

The standard that God uses for all things that he has ever done is the perfection of himself. So, whenever we want to learn something about creation, we go to God himself, who is the origin of all creation.

And so, in light of that, we read in verse number 1, or verse number 2, that the Spirit of God moved upon the face of the waters. Now, when the Bible says the Spirit of God moved upon the face of the waters, the word moved there is a very carefully chosen word.

This word moved is revealing the very first revelation from God regarding his desire for a family. The word in Hebrew means this, it describes an eagle hovering over a particular area, wanting to build a nest to start a family.

The idea here is an eagle not only seeking to build a nest for a family, but the idea is a hovering and a fluttering to protect the baby eagles. God, from eternity past, had a desire in his heart. He wanted to create a family that would be just like his beloved eternal Son.

And now this takes the Holy Spirit to help us to understand the fellowship that the Father and the Son has had for all eternity. The love, the intimacy, the enjoyment that they share with one another.

God wanted to share with his earthly family. And so the whole concept of family originates from the reality of what already existed in the Godhead. This is why family is so sacred and so special to God's heart.

If we see how far the idea of a family has fallen from that concept, it can break our heart. And so, as we study the Scriptures and we learn of the wonderful harmony within the Triune God, the love between the Father and the Son, the amazing mutual submission one to another, Father to Son and Son to Father, the amazing demonstration of the humility of God in the person of the Holy Spirit.

So many Scriptures tell us the Holy Spirit comes and he doesn't speak of himself. He's not self-centered. He doesn't talk about his name. But he comes to serve the interests of the Father and the Son.

Then when the Son comes, he says, I speak not of myself, but I only speak of my Father. He says the works that I do, they are not my works, but they are the works of the Father. And then when the Father speaks from heaven, he says, Behold my Son in whom I am well pleased.

The Father says, I have given all my glory to my Son and all my riches to my Son. The Father says, All that I have created, I have made my Son the heir of all things. In eternity past, when the Father saw that after he created man, we would fall into sin, what would he do?

How would he solve this horrible problem? All God had to do was look within himself and he saw the answer. The fall of man simply brought out the true nature and heart of who God is. God is who he reveals himself as, the Lamb of God.

And the Lamb of God is a perfect representation of the sacrificial, selfless nature of the Triune God. Now are we beginning to see a little glimpse into the kind of family the Triune God represents? When man fell, the Son willingly came to offer his life.

The Father willingly gave his Son. There was no argument within the Triune God. The Father didn't say to the Son, Son, I don't want you to go. And the Son didn't say, Well, Father, I don't really want to go.

God didn't say, Well, let's find someone else to do this. Let's ask an angel to go and become the sin sacrifice for the mess man has made. God didn't sit on his throne and see the mess that we got ourselves into, and say, Well, I'm God, and I'm not going to get dirty.

I'm just going to speak and clear it all up, and I'm not going to get dirty. No. No, but when God saw the sin, and when God saw the fall, it brought out of him a revelation of the depths of his true nature.

We say all of that, and we're only touching the surface. We could spend days, hours and hours a day, discovering the nature and character of God, as he reveals it in the Word of God. And that ultimately is displayed in his beloved Son, the Lord Jesus Christ.

But we won't do that at this time. We've said enough in order to prove the point. The true model of what a family ought to be is revealed in God himself. So when we ask ourselves, what is a family supposed to look like?

We can't look at an earthly thing. We have to go beyond earth to God himself. And so let me say, if you and I desire to have families that truly bring glory to God,.

If you and I truly desire to have a family that brings glory to God,.

We must pray that God takes the eyes of our hearts off of our failures, and off of our struggles. Some of us have had parents that have failed us. Some of us have had fathers that simply have not been there for us.

Some of us might have had mothers that were not there for us. Maybe we were hurt and abused and neglected. And God knows this. And he's very understanding and sympathetic toward our needs. But the way to healing is to take our eyes off the wounds and the hurts that are in our life.

And to turn them upon our loving Heavenly Father. Because in him, there is perfect healing, perfect family, and he's able to be our perfect Father. So now what do we do, now that we see the model of a family?

Healing Family Wounds Through Christ

How does all of this practically work? It practically works by taking one step at a time. And as we take one step at a time, we continuously look to Jesus Christ, who becomes all that we need to make the family work.

By turning our Bibles to the New Testament, and now that we have laid a foundation that God is the author of family, and is the role model of what a true family ought to be, we can turn our Bibles to Ephesians chapter 5, and we can read verses 22 through 29.

And you can read out loud.

When the Holy Spirit becomes the head of the Church, because the Holy Spirit is the head of the Church, just as Christ is the head of the Church, he is also the Savior of the Church. No matter what the Church is, no matter what the wife is, the Holy Spirit is the head of the Church.

You, as husband and wife, must love your wife, the Holy Spirit, and you must love the Church and be devoted to the Church. You must use the Holy Spirit to turn the Church into the Holy Spirit, so that you can offer yourself to the Church, regardless of whether you are a believer or a non-believer, the Holy Spirit is the head of the Church.

Husband and wife must love their wives as much as they love their bodies, because wives love themselves. No matter how much we love our bodies, we must always take care of our breathing. This is the same with the Church.

Here God is describing how a family works.

Remember, God's purpose is to show Himself in a family.

All the answers to the question of why can be found in God Himself. Why should wives submit to their own husbands? Why should husbands love their own wives? Why should husbands lay their life down for their wives?

Why? Is this just an arbitrary rule? Is God just throwing out rules now because He just wants to? If we look at this as just rules, it's not going to make sense to us. These aren't just rules that we are commanded to follow.

This is a revelation of the way God Himself, with the Triune God, functions within Himself. There is mutual submission within the Godhead. There is selflessness within the Godhead. There is a laying down of one's own interests for the sake of others.

This language in Ephesians 5, 22 all the way down to 33, is just language describing the divine nature working through and in husbands and wives. This is so liberating, brothers and sisters. When we no longer approach this as rules that we have to try and follow, instead they are promises that God Himself will enable us to fulfill in and through the power of Jesus Christ.

Remember in Genesis 1, verse 26, it was after God created all the physical universe, He created the animal kingdom and the vegetable kingdom. He created all of the beautiful stars in the sky and all of the mountains, and all of creation revealed the glory of God.

But not adequately enough that could reveal His glory, then all would know what that was. Why did God create man? He wanted man to represent on earth His divine image and likeness. What a holy and sacred calling.

All of those lovely moral attributes in God that reveal His character, He wants to be lived through you and I. This is what revolution is. It revolutionizes families. It is a revelation of God's purpose in creating the family.

Every husband and every father is called with a most holy and sacred calling. Through the power of Jesus Christ, we are called to demonstrate to our family the qualities that are in God Himself, of love and self-sacrifice, of guidance and protection, of leadership and headship.

Where do we get these qualities from? From the author, God Himself. What a wonderful plan, isn't it? Oh brothers and sisters, this is a living, real thing. This meets the practical needs and the struggles that we have in our marriages.

We have to be lifted out of the struggles and see God. See the provision in Jesus Christ. God said that Jesus Christ, in Him, we have all that we need for life and godliness in this world. In Jesus Christ, we have all that we need to solve and work through every single problem that we have in our marriage.

And so, I feel very strongly impressed by the Holy Spirit, that God would want to emphasize the whole idea of marriage was born by Him. And it was born by Him because He wants it to be a picture through whom His divine likeness can be seen.

And if He is asking us to do that, then He is also providing Himself as the source and power that will enable us to do it. So as we look into the Word of God, at all the scriptures that talk about family, and we begin to unpack the practical issues of family life, we can't get lost in the earthliness of our struggles.

But we have to keep our hearts above seeing God's ultimate intention. I can remember years ago, I spoke with a husband and wife who were having great conflict in their marriage. The husband would come home from work, and he would sit down, and he would put his feet up, and he would begin to talk to his wife about the problems that he had during the day.

But she was a little distant. She was sort of listening with one ear. And he would do this week after week, and month after month. After a while, this conflict would subside. Knowing that she was distant began to cause a little bit of resentment and bitterness in his heart.

And he began to resent the fact that his wife didn't give him full undivided attention. And this resentment turned into anger. And so, we began to talk. And as he basically told me the same story I just told you, the Holy Spirit whispered in my heart, tell this dear brother that his anger is because of selfishness.

He comes home and he has an expectation. A feeling of entitlement. You know what entitlement means? It's that feeling that we have the right to something. We who live in America feel very entitled about a lot of things.

We must be very careful with this deep-rooted feeling of entitlement. Because when we come to our God in Heaven, we see a Savior who gave up His entitlements. He gave up His rights. He was God. And He became a man.

He remained God as a man. But He gave up His right to be worshipped. He gave up His right to be honored. He gave up His prerogatives as deity. And He became a servant. And He healed people who didn't say thank you.

And He served. Then He went even lower than that. And He became obedient to death. He who knew no sin. He who knew no impurity. He who only enjoyed perfect fellowship with His Father. Who was a king by virtue of being the eternal Son of God.

Who was deserving and worthy of all honor and praise and glory and majesty. He emptied Himself, Paul said. That word empty is kenosis.

It means to give up one's rights.

What was the problem that this husband was having in his marriage? Are we listening? Are we listening to the Holy Spirit?

He was coming home with the expectation that he deserved something. And if he didn't get it, he was going to retaliate.

Here's the nature. Husbands, love your wives. Give your life for them.

Even as Christ. Even as Christ.

Emptied His life out for the church. Now is it right for a wife to honor her husband and listen to her husband? Absolutely yes. But what if our wives had a bad day? What if our wives had struggles with the children?

What if our wives just were feeling low? What does love do? It gives up the demand. It gives up the feeling of I have the right to be treated in this way. It forgets about its own needs. It forgets about its own wants.

It doesn't hold people accountable if they don't give what it wants. And through the power of the Holy Spirit, through revealing the divine nature of the Father Heart of God, the husband sits down, begins to talk, recognizes wife is only listening with one ear, stops talking, and says, Sweetheart, how was your day?

Talk to me about it. How practical. How practical. Doesn't Paul say, let not, don't just think of your own interests, but think also of the interests of others. Now brothers and sisters, by nature we can't do this.

By nature we're very self-centered. By nature we love those that love us, but if we don't get that love back, we resent it.

But if people don't love us back, we resent it. Human love.

Will never pass the test of time. Even the love, the human love, that a parent has for their children, can turn to resentment and hatred if the children grow up and disrespect and despise their parents.

Honeymoon love it's okay, it's part of God's plan, He made that kind of love to have its place. But that kind of love does not last forever. You can be honeymoon in love with one another one day, and then you let wife cross husband's will, or vice versa, and all of a sudden those happy feelings of love turn into feelings of anger and resentment.

Has anyone ever experienced that? Come to save us, not only from our sins, but from ourselves. And all of that humanity, that sinful humanity that we inherited from Adam, when Jesus Christ died on the cross, He brought that sinful humanity and our sins upon Himself, and He became a curse.

And that was God saying, I have cursed the first Adam, and when Jesus died, He is the death without any burial. And then when Jesus rose again from the dead, He rose as a new man, out of death, with a glorified divine nature, and in that divine human nature, all the fullness of God's attributes, and all of His character is invested.

That perfect love that never fails,.

That perfect patience, that gentleness,.

And now through the new birth,.

And the power of the Holy Spirit, we become partakers of that divine nature,.

And we can all be partakers of that divine nature,.

And He becomes the source from which we draw all that we need, to be what we ought to be in our marriages and families. Now in Ephesians chapter 5, we see that God is asking wives to submit, and husbands to love.

And God is asking this because that represents the divine order and character that is in the Godhead. But now, Paul tells us in verse number 28, he says, men ought to love their own wives.

As their own body. Then he makes a profound statement,.

He says, he that loves his wife loves himself. Oh, can we see this mystery? When God the Father loves the Son, who is he really loving? Himself. It's not three gods, it's one God. We don't serve three gods.

Here, oh Israel, the Lord thy God is one. One God. One triune God. Father, Son, and Spirit. They are not the same. And so when Father loves Son, when Son loves Father, and now Paul takes this eternal principle and brings it down into marriage.

Because marriage is supposed to represent the eternal principle of God. Men, as your own body. For whoever loves his wife loves himself. For no one hates his own body, but nourishes it and cherishes it.

And then he says, even as the Lord the Church. And then he says in verse 32, this is a great mystery, but I speak concerning Christ and the Church. So Paul is taking the earthly institution of marriage, and showing that it is a picture of the spiritual union between Christ and the Church,.

Which is a picture.

Of the harmony and union in the Godhead. So both the earthly family together with the heavenly family, the Church, are called by God to reveal the harmony and divine qualities that are in the Godhead.

Divine Character Revealed Through God's Commandments

Some of the children here, and possibly the adults, have you ever wondered why God gave us ten commandments? I have many times talked to my children and many others, and I've asked them, why does God say ten times,.

Thou shalt not?

Why does He do that? Is He just trying to make my life miserable?

If we look at the ten commandments as just rules.

That we have to obey and because God said so, it can be frustrating. If we view marriage the same way, it can be frustrating. Husbands, why do I have to love my wife to the point where I have to lay my life down for her?

Wives, you mean I have to submit to Him? If we only take it to that level, it can be frustrating. But if we go to a higher level, the frustration disappears.

Every young person, listen carefully. Every young person, listen carefully.

God gives us commandments because these commandments teach us something about God. That's what God is always wanting to do. In all of the lessons of the Bible from Genesis to Revelation,.

From Genesis to Revelation,.

God is trying to teach us something about Himself. Remember God says at the very beginning, I created you because I want you to be like me. So why does God say don't worship any other gods be like Him and He does not.

There's no other gods. Why does God say to love your neighbor? Because God so loved the world. Why does God say children, honor and respect your parents?

Because God doesn't have any disrespect.

Or rebellion in Him and wants us to be just like Him. Young person, listen carefully to the Holy Spirit. The only way to truly be happy and to be truly fulfilled and to really know what joy is is to be like God.

Not to become God but to be like God in character and nature. The devil lies to us and says if you want to have fun if you want to really know how to really have joy do your own thing. Follow the dark ways of this world.

But God's word is here to say that that is a lie. And us adults need to remember that too. Always remember. Fulfillment does not come any other place than in God Himself. The root cause to all the problems that we experience as Christians.

And all the problems that are in the world today.

No matter what they are we have turned from the living God and we are trying to find meaning and significance outside of Him. And that is impossible. God is the perfect eternal being and God says all things were created by Him and for Him.

Everything that God created can only fulfill its purpose when it turns back to God and in God alone finds. So why does God say don't steal? Why does He say that? Because God is not a thief. God doesn't steal and He wants us to be like Him.

Why does He say don't lie? Don't take His name in vain. Don't be greedy and covetous. Why? Why does God put these rules on us? There are more than rules brothers and sisters. They are showing us the way that God.

They are showing us what God is like. And in the person.

Of Jesus Christ we see all of these wonderful qualities displayed. No man has ever lived.

Without sinning.

No man has ever lived without turning from the living God and following their rebellious heart.

Except one.

The man Christ Jesus. Jesus is the perfect man. Don't look into yourself to try and find perfection brothers and sisters. Husbands, don't look into yourself to try and find the love you need to love your wives.

Your human love will fail. Wives, don't look into yourself to find the resources to honor and respect and submit to your husband. You'll find a rebellious heart. But together husband, wife, and children we turn our eyes away from ourselves and we turn them to the perfect man Jesus Christ.

In Jesus I see the love that I need for my wife. Wives,.

When you see Jesus you see the love.

You need for your husband. When I see Jesus I see the love I need as a father for my seven children. Because without Him constantly energizing me and working in my life I can't love my children the way I need to.

How can I be patient with my children and give them the attention that they need? I can't. But through Jesus Christ I can do all things. Do you see dear brothers and sisters where our lesson is bringing us?

Isn't it liberating to see everything as it relates to God and His Son Jesus Christ? I've been married for almost 30 years and when I first got married I had just been a Christian for a couple years before I got married.

I was a teenager when I became a Christian and so I was just a young man. And I was about to get married. I had been engaged and an older man came to me a few days before I got married and he was talking to me about how happy he was that I was about to get married and he looked at me and he said, Phil you think you know Colette now.

Colette was the name of my fiancée who became my wife he said, you wait until you get married.

Well, you just wait and see until you get married.

You're going to really see who Colette is. I pondered what he said I thought about it.

A few nights later while crying the Holy Spirit spoke to me. And here's what the Holy Spirit said. He reminded me what this man told me.

And then he said but I say to you you think you know yourself but you wait until you're married and you're going to really come to know yourself. And that defined the direction of my marriage for 30 years.

Don't look into my wife and say you're my problem. Or do I look into my children's lives and say.

You're my problem if I have a problem.

It's my problem and I've got to find more grace in Jesus Christ. Many years ago my son had a computer and it broke and he asked me permission to take it apart to try and fix it. He spent two full days taking that computer apart piece by piece.

And after two days he came to me and he said Dad I've taken it apart.

Piece by piece and I can't fix it. What are we going to do I said. Son. Let's pack it up in a box and send it to the manufacturer.

So he said good idea and we did that. He said good idea so we did that and we did that.

And two days later we got an email. The email said.

We got your computer we fixed it and we sent it back and within a couple days later we got it back and there it was completely fixed and my son was happy. But as that happened I pondered that whole story and the Holy Spirit again spoke to me and he said Phil you can't fix other people you can't fix your wife you can't fix your children you can't fix your own life.

Only the manufacturer can only the creator can.

You see.

My son had a desire to fix the computer but he did not understand all of how it was made but those who made it did. Brothers and sisters God alone knows how to fix us. It is not our mission in life to try and fix people if you make it your mission as a father or a husband to try and.

Fix everything that you think is broken. You're going to make things worse not better.

Bringing Broken Families to Jesus

You remember in the New Testament there was a man that was crippled and he had some friends good friends. They were good friends because they heard about Jesus and they knew their friend was broken. He couldn't walk and they knew they couldn't fix him so each one took a corner of the bed that he was on.

And together they brought him to Jesus. And when Jesus.

Saw the broken man because his friends brought him to Jesus.

The Bible says that Jesus fixed him today.

In our marriages we have problems we have difficulties we have struggles but we also have a God who knows just how to fix us and as a family if we will learn to bring one another.

To the feet of Jesus Jesus.

Will work on all of us that doesn't mean at times we can't correct and instruct our children but don't try to fix.

Leave the fixing to Jesus. Husbands, we need to lead.

Under the guidance of the Holy Spirit we need to care and nurture our wives.

Guide our children bring them to Jesus in prayer.

Every husband should know what it is to weep in private for their family and bring them to Jesus every husband and father.

Should weep in public too.

During times of family devotions and bring their family to Jesus set the example show them by example what it means to come to Jesus. Well brothers and sisters we can go on and on. This is a wonderful, wonderful revelation of our Lord in our midst.

But I do want to leave an opportunity for any questions that you might have. Of course we did not go through the 8 pages of this newsletter this little message at this time. I did feel that the Lord wanted me to do that instead to lay this foundation and with this foundation these 8 pages make much more sense.

And so now if anyone has any questions or any kind of interaction if it's ok with our brother Timothy then it's perfectly fine with me to ask them. But before we do that let's bow our hearts in a word of prayer.

Prayer for Healing, Hope, and Selfless Love

Our Father in Heaven thank you so much for your great love. Thank you for your Father heart it is so large and full. It is your Father heart that conceived the idea of a family a family that would be before you in love for all eternity.

Father thank you for your Son Father thank you for giving us your Son who willingly gave his life for us. Who showed us what kind of a sacrificial heart you have. Who never complained never demanded his rights never was there a harsh word in his mouth.

And he died for our sins. And Father we thank you for the precious Holy Spirit who never speaks of himself who never brings attention to himself but delights to reveal the glory of the Son and the majesty of the Father.

I'm asking you Father.

To everyone here today give us a revelation of who you are.

By the power of the Holy Spirit.

And let us see in you all of those qualities.

You can reproduce in our family.

Every struggle and problem that we're having every failure and hurt may we be healed from as we see.

I pray Lord if there's anyone struggling with bitterness and unforgiveness those who have been hurt perhaps some who have not had a mother or a father or whose mother and father failed them. I pray Lord Jesus that you will heal them that they will confess to you their struggle and their sin and find perfect cleansing and healing through the blood of Jesus Christ.

Where there's.

A lack of love. May you fill that heart with the divine love of Jesus Christ where the devil has lied to some and said there's no hope for your marriage. I pray you'll cast the devil out and fill that marriage with hope through Jesus Christ.

We look to you Jesus. Help us to bring one another to the feet of Jesus so that he can touch our lives and make us whole. We ask all these things in his wonderful name. Amen. Do we know the chorus? It's all the same chorus of all that your light has exposed.

Any bitterness or anger or hatred any unforgiveness we release to you. We forgive one another. We admit that we have failed one another but we forgive. We receive the healing through Jesus Christ. And together we look to Jesus the perfect one as the source of all of our help.

We release our rights to you Lord. And we pray that you'll fill us with selfless love so that we can be controlled by this love and be able to live through Jesus Christ sacrificial lives. When he's present he touches us he heals us.

He gives hope where there was. No hope. He gives love where there was.

Hatred and bitterness.

He gives all we need when someone has a question.