Jacob the grave digger — Murray McCandless

Genesis chapter 35. Genesis 35 verse 1. And God said, now up to this time Jacob is saying a lot. His sons are saying a lot. The chapter before this is so tragic and so pathetic. Just glancing over yesterday, Arthur Pink said he would not comment on the chapter.

He says it's too sad. Now there's a man that's written a lot of books in the Bible. He said he would not comment on the tragic events of chapter 34 with the sons of Jacob over their daughter and what took place at Shechem.

God Calls Jacob Back to Bethel

Now when we come to chapter 35, it is significant to notice God said unto Jacob, arise, go up to Bethel, dwell there, make there an altar unto God that appeared unto thee when thou fleddest from the face of Esau thy brother.

Then Jacob said unto his household and to all that were with him, put away the strange gods which are among you and be clean and change your garments and let us arise and go up to Bethel and I will make there an altar unto God who answered me in the day of my distress and was with me in the way which I went.

For those that have just come in, Genesis 35 verse number 4. And they gave unto Jacob all the strange gods which were, not just some of them, all the strange gods which were in their hand and all their earrings which were in their ears and Jacob hid them under the oak which was by Shechem.

And they journeyed and the terror of God was upon the cities that were around about them and they did not pursue after the sons of Jacob. So Jacob came to Luz which it is in Canaan of which is in the land of Canaan that is Bethel.

He and all the people that were with him. And he built there an altar and called on the called the place El Bethel because their God appeared unto him when he fled from the face of his brother but Deborah, Rebecca's nurse, died.

She was buried beneath Bethel under an oak and the name of it was called Ellen Bethuth. And God appeared unto Jacob again. Again. When he came out of Paddan Aram and blessed him God said unto him, Thy name is Jacob.

Thy name shall not be called anymore Jacob but Israel shall be their name. And he called his name Israel and so on. And of course Jacob sets up the pillar but for the sake of time please come down to verse 15.

And Jacob called in the name of the place where God spake with him Bethel. And they journeyed from Bethel and there was but a little way to come to Ephrath. And Rachel travailed and she had hard labor.

Came to pass when she was in hard labor that the midwife said unto her, Fear not thou shalt have this son also. It came to pass as her soul was in departing for she died that she called his name Benoy.

But his father called him Benjamin. Rachel died and was buried in the way to Ephrath which is in Bethlehem. And Jacob set a pillar upon her grave that is the pillar of Rachel's grave unto this day. And Israel, not Jacob, Israel journeyed.

Okay? Israel journeyed and spread the tent beyond the tower of Edar and so on. Then of course the sons are listed. Please come down now to verse number 27. And Jacob came unto Isaac his father unto Mamre into the city of Arba which is in Hebron.

Which is Hebron. There Abraham and Isaac soldier and the days of Isaac were in hundred and four score years. And Isaac gave up the ghost and died and was gathered unto his people being old and full of days.

And his sons Esau and Jacob buried him. Very interesting chapter and I'm going to I've spoken at times about Jacob the man of the staff. Jacob the man of the pillar. We're going to this afternoon look at Jacob the gravedigger.

Sounds very interesting doesn't it? Very exciting to speak on Jacob the gravedigger. Happens to be four burials in this chapter. Four of them. Not without significance. Now I'm including the first one under the oak tree even though he says the word hid.

We're going to talk about burying it. There had to be some digging before he could bury all these that they these earrings and all these things. There had to be a grave obviously. I would put it this way.

The Grave for the Idols

First of all there is a grave for the idols. Now you know what that was really saying? There's a backsliding that is past. Here's something permanent. Wouldn't God have been maybe like Josiah he would have done better if he'd have burnt them.

Burnt them to ashes and strawed them over the land. But give him credit. God never told him he had to do this. He knew it had to be done. But we'll come back to that. So it is a grave for the idols, a backsliding that has passed.

Deborah and Breaking with the Past

Another sad burial he has and that's Rebekah's nurse. Rebekah's nurse. That was a Deborah, a very sad moment. There's already a history in Jacob's family of Deborah. That was not a backsliding that is past but that was a breaking with the past.

In other words Deborah was a link that Jacob had with the past that now had to be let go. Next one was a very hard grave. They get harder as they go. This was Rachel's. Rachel's grave. I sometimes have wondered and you can, I have it highlighted in my Bibles, very easy to see in verse number 16, and they journeyed from Bethel.

Why? Why leave Bethel? Jacob stay there. That's where you've had communication from God. Why leave Bethel? Think of the memories and all that can be talked about with Bethel but it says that he journeyed from Bethel.

You know what it cost him? It cost him his wife. We're hearing from Mr. Beatty this morning in Ruth chapter 1, a man makes up his mind that he's going to journey. It's just the reverse of that. A Lamanic takes his journey without any direction from God and there are burials.

Costly business. Costly business dear believer to leave Bethel, the house of God. Not just younger people, older people, people my age and older and younger. Never leave Bethel. But we'll come back to that.

So we have a grave for the idols, backsliding this past. Secondly, Rebecca's nurse is a breaking with the past. Rachel, it's a bereavement. It's a bereavement that is past. As much as he loved that woman, as much he must have cradled her and literally tried to hang on to the threads of life as they were leaving that body of someone that he so loved.

He had to get over the bereavement. There's a bereavement in the past. Next is dad's grave. That's a hard one. That's a hard one. Not easy to bury your parents. If there's something harder is when parents have to bury a child.

I don't know that from experience, but I know that from what people have shared. But it is the burial of his father. You say what is that? That's a bridging of the past. That's a bridging of the past.

We say how do you get that? That brought two brothers together that before were literally at each other. Did it really take this? Now I'll mention when I come to it about the patriarchs, how that there's always them coming together.

A Jewish funeral was very significant. A Jewish funeral was very significant. This one was too. So just quickly to give it to you again. For the idols, it's a backsliding in this past. Wouldn't it be nice?

I don't know any of your condition here today. It's bad enough keeping track of my own, but really, really brethren, are we gaining ground or is it a backsliding? Wouldn't it be nice if the Stoke Conference put my backsliding, your backsliding in the past?

And you look back to this weekend and say, that preacher doesn't know me. God spoke to my heart. And things are going to change. Sitting at a table one time and a brother came to me, didn't even know his name.

He said, I really appreciate your ministry. I want to thank you for it. I said, well, thank you very much, brother. And there was another couple sitting there I know very well. And I said to them, I said, you're a humble man.

They said to me, what did you tell him he's a humble man for? I said, see, you people are too proud to not tell a man you enjoyed the word, because you're afraid he'll get proud like you. So you don't tell him.

Is that how you work? Backsliding to this past. Rebecca's nurse, it's a breaking with the past. There's something here today you've got to break with the past. That old home has got too much influence.

Oh, I know you want to see them saved, but they really don't want you going where you go with the Christians. And it's not that you discount love or anything like that. The Lord Jesus told that man that was going to follow him that said, I'm just going to go home and bid farewell to them that are at my house.

He says, no way, no way. Do you know what house is going to tell you? Don't go with him. Don't go with him. There had to be a breaking with the past. Rachel was a bereavement that is past. And we sorrow.

We'll come to it in a minute, but not as others. And finally, his father, Isaac, it was a bridging of the past. We got some past here that needs to be bridged today. You shake hands with every brother in this auditorium today.

Surely you're not going to go and break bread tomorrow morning. And there's someone you can't shake hands with. That is unscriptural. And it's doctrinally wrong, a bridging of the past. However, I find it significant that, uh, really Bethel wasn't that far from Jerusalem.

We're talking likely 12 miles. God does not say to him, although it would have been right to say to him, Jacob, back to Bethel, back to Bethel. No, he says up to Bethel, up to Bethel. In other words, Jacob had to learn.

He had to go to the highest ground possible. House of God, no matter what way you take of it or take from it, is intended to be highest ground possible. Nice to be in Bethel. Hope there's no other place you'd rather be or you'd sooner be.

But although geographically, 12 miles north of Jerusalem, God could have said, like I said to him, back to Bethel, but he doesn't. But the key to the change in Jacob's situation was moving. He had been living in wrong places too long.

Moving Upward Instead of Away

Now your address may not have changed. And the people that you meet with may not have changed. But I speaking to some here today, and really the truth is just like this, you've been living in wrong places too long.

What changes the mind of a man like a Jonathan that is so attached to David? Wouldn't think of David being out of his thought. What changes his mind? How come he doesn't go with David in chapter 19, chapter 20?

Well, look who he's with in chapter 18 and 19. He's with his father. He'd gone home. Home just simply seemed to blunt the edge of a man that loved David, who I accompany with, who are the people that I associate with, have tremendous impact on my Christian experience.

And so it did with him. But it is significant that he says, dwell there. In other words, just not a visit. You're not a tourist, okay? You dwell there. I mean, even when it comes to the world, a believer cannot go into the world as a tourist.

Amalek had to find that out. Lot had to find that out. The prodigal in the far country had to find that out. He did not go as a tourist. He joins himself to a citizen of that country. I want to say when it comes to the house of God, it's not tourist business.

You go there to dwell. You go there to live. Who'd you sooner live among than these people here today? Come on, I know we have our weaknesses. We know, I know we have our faults, our whatever. But now listen, there's something that God does not say to him.

Jacob knew. Jacob knew that if I go up to Bethel, there's a few things got to change in my house. So he calls his house together. You'll notice that he will say, he says to them, put away the strange gods that are among you, among you, not among us.

You know, Rachel was a wonderful girl. I went together from Rachel, but she loved her idolatry. She did. She's either stealing them, traveling with them, or hiding them on old Laban. He says, that's got to be put away.

And when that's put away, he says, you've got to clean yourselves. Because idolatry brings defilement. It brings uncleanness. So that's why he says, put away the strange gods that are among you and be clean and change your garments.

Change your garments. In other words, what we're wearing now is not in keeping with the house of God. Okay, what I'm traveling in now, come back to our book of Ruth. Ruth in the field. What does she do before she meets with Boaz?

She changes her garments. In fact, she dresses in keeping with where she's going. I stepped onto an elevator in Saugus two years ago. May have told you this. It's just coming to my mind now. I was there with my wife and two or three of our grandchildren.

When you get 13, you lose count. Anyhow, wait a minute, 64 first cousins, you lose with men. Man gets on the elevator and says, what day is this? I could see where he was going. He's going to the golf course.

I think that's the golf course, that's where he was going. He said, what day is this? I wanted to say, are you kidding, man? Before I said anything, he said, Sunday? I said, yeah, Sunday. He says, you look like you're going to church.

I said, you got it right, partially. I'm going to be with Christians that gathered a local church. So we are expected to be dressed accordingly. Nice to see the way you're dressed today. Very commendable.

Sisters too. I realize I don't know world. I mean, I hear this from home and not that I do anything in that department. I don't. In fact, they come into my department. You don't trust me with what I buy anymore.

I got to wear what they buy. So you say we pray for me. But anyhow, I want to do something else. Let me say this. I might be touching close to home, but I'm going to say it. Not because I'm stroking a long beard this morning, this afternoon, but I have been around a while.

Discernment Before Changing Assemblies

Any move you make from where you are in assembly testimony, you do it with great care and great prayer. Or you will pay the consequences. The praying doesn't take place before, the crying will take place after.

You say, well, you don't understand my circumstances and so on, but I just want you to notice this move. In other words, make sure any move you make, okay? You get employment somewhere, good for you. But can I just say something?

Make sure, brother, any move, sister, with your husband, any move you make, make sure it is an upward direction. Move up, or you'll be a better Christian in that assembly. Did they hear from you here?

So they're going to hear from you up there? Make sure your move is up, not out. No, those that moved out. It's interesting when we come to our Bible, the first man that we read about that moved out, you know who it was?

It was Cain. It was a religious man. No attachment to sacrifice, not with God's sacrifice. What's it say concerning Cain? We go back to the book of Genesis, it says that Cain went out. He went out from where?

From the presence of the Lord. Cain and the presence of the Lord, yes, that's what it says. Well, listen, most moves that I have followed out, they've left presence as well, eventually. Serious business.

Make sure your move is up, your move is not out. What's John saying in his epistle, 1 John chapter 2? He says, they went out from us, they were not of us, for had they been of us, they would have continued, but they went out that they may manifest that they were not all of us.

Unfortunately, unfortunately, a wrong move manifests exactly what I am, no matter how I pray or preach. Need it again? Unfortunately, no matter how I pray or preach, a move out will manifest something of my character, nothing else will.

Cain goes out from the presence of the Lord. John says that they went out. There's another man, his name is Judas. I know you'll come back and say, well, he wasn't saved. Okay, not everybody that leaves the assembly, we can just stroke them off and say they're not saved.

But what it says about Judas, he went out, but it doesn't stop there either. It says he went out and it was night. It's a dark day in any assembly when our brethren rise to their feet. And I saw them do it in tears and weep when they have to announce so-and-so is leaving the fellowship of the assembly at their request.

You know where they went? They usually end up where Lot went. Lot went into a cave with his family. It's a dark scene and the rest of it is sad history. Say, that's pretty boring. No, no, it's not. Just make sure your move isn't out, make sure your move is up.

There's another direction. There's those that can move back. They move back. What's it say in John chapter 6 and verse 66 of the Lord Jesus? There are many disciples that follow him, but it says this in John chapter 6.

Many of the disciples went back and walked no more with him. They went back. It helps me this morning when Mr. Beatty again was saying about Orpah. Where'd she go? She went back. How else do you describe it?

And how many times do you hear about Orpah after that? How many times is her name mentioned? It's not there. Don't have to be a Bible student. Just get your concordance out. Whatever you want. That's history she's done.

Seemed very simple, didn't it? She slid back. You talk to her, you'd say, what do you expect me to do? Here I am, I'm a widow. Can't she give me a break? Look what Ruth does. What did Ruth do? She went up.

She went up. Now go to your concordance. Notice how many times you got Ruth and Boaz and those all in the scriptures. Why? Because of a move in the right direction. Well, there's those that have. There's those that have.

I thank God for some moves that some have made. Really, it's not all negative. And they've made a move up. Brethren come to you and say, tremendous help. They're a blessing to our assembly. I'm thrilled to hear it.

You know that. But don't make a move out. And more than that, don't make a move back. What's Joshua warn them? Hard to get in the book of Joshua and they're warned. Come to the end of the book of Joshua chapter 23 and chapter and verse number 12.

Joshua is almost frustrated, almost gives up. He says, listen, if you do in any wise go back. If you do in any wise go back and cleave unto the remnant of these nations, even these that remain among you, and you shall make marriages with them and go unto them.

They to you. Tim and I held it against our parents because they wouldn't let us go to grandpa's cottage. And grandma, when she had us away from mom and dad used to tell us about the tremendous fishing and the boating, but we couldn't go.

You know why? They're afraid we might pick up a Philistine girl. Might as well tell you. My father's 94. He doesn't remember it, but that's it. Or worse yet, get something from Moab. So don't be careful.

Don't move out. Don't move back. But more than that, there's another direction you can go. Down, down. Three times we read of Samson, he went down. That's bad enough. But you know, the last time we read about Samson, he went down, took his parents with him.

That hasn't stopped. I'm sorry, that hasn't stopped. I admire some of you believers here today. Your children have not brought you the joy you'd like them to bring. They've gone to somewhere else. They've moved out, whatever way you want to call it.

You've stayed the course. You've stayed the course. You've put down like a Ruth. You've been like a Joshua. For me and my house, we will serve the Lord. Good for you. God honors that kind of faith. But at times, more than once, the brethren have come to us, head down.

Not on our part to say, well, it was tough losing the kids. Hard to lose a mom and dad. And they followed the kids. That's exactly what happened with Samson. Says concerning Samson that he went down. Really, Egypt had been a scene of backsliding.

A scene of backsliding. They picked up things in Egypt they should never have had. Do you know why they were told not to multiply horses under themselves? Do you know why Israel was told not to have horses?

Because it'd be a quick way back to Egypt. In other words, they could get there just a little too fast without even thinking. So he says, don't multiply horses under yourselves. God brought them out with a steady hand.

And it was God that was always trying to take them to the higher ground. Now here's this man, Jacob, says we're going up to Bethel. He knew what Bethel meant. He'd been there. He'd been there. It's interesting that when you're reading the passage, before you read of Bethel, you read of Luz.

What's Luz mean? Well, you say, Luz means separation. It does. Look a little further in the biblical dictionary. You know what it means? Departure. In other words, Jacob had to go back to the point of departure.

And that's where he got reconnected. And he knew what Bethel meant. Maybe the others didn't. Notice, it was not only his house, but those that were among them. There had to be strangers in there that needed to be taught.

And there are young believers that have to be taught. And they're willing to learn. And they start to watch us. Nobody watches us closer than our children. Just a note. You remember, brother, you can teach your children what you want, but they will only reproduce what you are.

I can teach my children what I know, but they will only reproduce what I am. Jacob understood this. And so he is saying to them, there's things that got to change here. You know, he says, we just can't go up to the house like this.

He says, you got to put away these strange gods. Idolatry can be a terrible thing. It wasn't that day, but it can be just as a great affliction today. What is it? It's anything that takes the place of God, to put it simple.

It's anything and everything in my life that is handcrafted by the enemy to take me away from God. Is there something today that you've got to get the shovel out and start burying after the Stoke Conference?

You know, well, I shouldn't be doing that. I shouldn't be going there. I shouldn't really be dabbling in that. Your wife is telling you that. Or your husband is telling you that. Before the Lord, before the Lord, put it where it belongs, underneath the oak tree.

Whenever you read of the oak, it's always a picture of death. We're not told in the Bible, but if I was being asked on a test and I had to write the test I wanted to pass, what the cross was made of? Likely oak.

Always was a picture of death. And Jacob took these things and he hid them under the oak tree. However, Jacob had some influence in his home. Earlier he wouldn't have had that influence. You remember, it's Reuben that says unto his brothers, he said, said not I unto you, said not against the child, but they wouldn't hear.

Oh, why wouldn't they hear? Because he'd lost the influence with the family. Remember what it says of Lot? That he went out. Lot went out. And he spake to his sons-in-law, but they would not hear. At just the time when he wanted them so desperately, desperately to hear.

He said, you? You? You're going to tell us? Don't think so. How much influence do you really have in that family? Nice to be in a family and around the family. You can see dad and mom have had some powerful influence here.

Those parents aren't boastful. They're humble. They're just thankful that their children, to the moment, to the moment, bring them joy. That's why we have a conference like this at a stout. That they'll always bring you joy.

Not so with Lot's family. Not so with many that were in the scripture. That's nothing against those that have had otherwise experiences. However, he knew what had to go. You know, a brother that honors and respects God, I'll go slow, a brother that honors and respects God invariably will have a family that honors and respects him.

That was so with Jacob. Those idols are gone. But it doesn't stop there. He says, listen, not only that, he says, the gods are among you and be clean. Be clean. Because these things bring defilement. They bring defilement in a very subtle way into our souls.

And he says, and change your garments. And now he says in verse number three, let us arise and go up. Notice twice you have the expression. Same language that's used of the prodigal when he gets tired of the far country.

And he says, I will arise. Notice he doesn't say I'm going home. He says, I will arise and go to my father. In other words, there's a relationship here that's got to be made right. Your relationship right today, brother?

Relationship in your home? Relationship with your family? This is a big grave. I'm not sure how big that oak tree, but it's likely to be a pretty good size. Wouldn't be easy digging. There'd be a root system.

There'd be a lot of things to contend with. I've often wondered why the oak tree? Well, wouldn't it be something to be able to go by in the coming day and say, good. Done with that. Done with that. But there could have been the temptation to know where they were and maybe just go back and see how they were making out there in the dirt.

But I have no record at all that he did that. That were in their hand. It's interesting. We get to verse number five. It says that the terror of God was upon the cities. No, it's not the terror of Jacob.

Chapter 34, Jacob says, you've made my name distinct among the inhabitants of the land. You give me a bad name. No mention of the name of the Lord. Isn't that sad? What about the honor of the Lord's name?

It was just a family name. It doesn't look good now. Yeah. But Jacob, you're using the wrong ladder in chapter 34. Watch that man limping as he takes the ladder off this building and to the next building.

And he's building. Oh, he's just being a good entrepreneur. He's just being a successful farmer. But he forgot he had a daughter there. And because she wasn't involved in Jacob Incorporated, you forget about her till it was too late.

Well, the men of Shechem didn't forget about her. No wonder it's such a tragedy. Now, Jacob says we are going and we are going up, up. But then we come to another grave. That's Deborah, Deborah's grave.

Deborah's Burial and Separation from the Past

Rebecca's nurse died and she was buried, buried in Bethel. And notice under an oak she was. Deborah had been Jacob's nurse. He owed a lot to her. Maybe there was more in raising him than there was by his own mother.

But she had been an appreciated woman in the family. She knew that family like nobody else knew them. She had been there and she had nursed them. She knew the boys. She watched their development. But there comes a time when there's got to be a breaking, as I say, with the past.

And this is exactly what had to happen. Maybe she was there to help bring them into the world. And he felt, I owe so much to her. But there's got to come a moment when there's a breaking with the past.

That's what you did, wasn't it, brother, when you married your wife? You left home, that's mom and dad, not leaving their respect, and you would cleave only unto her? And that doesn't mean you're down at mom's on coffee every afternoon at three o 'clock while the wife's sitting home there looking out the window.

Now, if you go to mom's for coffee, please don't beat me up outside, okay? Enjoy your coffee, but don't forget your first commitment. Had to be a break with the past. Past life, past interest. Not a critical.

Now, there's nothing in here you could really criticize him about. But here he is again, he's digging another grave, breaking with the past. I have no idea what your past might be that you've got to break with.

I'm not sure what commitments or what it might be. Is there things in the past that you want to break with? Abraham knew that. Lots through the scriptures, and they knew that. Wouldn't break with the past.

Some wouldn't. Can be a hard business, but it can be a costly not to. Very quickly, next grave we come to. But just notice as we're going along there in verse number 16, and they journeyed from Bethel.

You know, you're going along the chapter and it's going so well, and like he said, Bethel, and you think, ah, great, great. Just like when somebody comes into the assembly fellowship, which you want to do, right?

And, uh, thank God. Going to Bethel. Not going to that place down the road there that doesn't know much about God. I'm not saying they don't preach the gospel, but you've been taught better than that.

And now we read these words, and they journeyed from Bethel. It's just a little way. He says it was just a little way to come to Ephrata. Just a little way. It's not far away. Does that sound familiar?

You got it. There was Lot. Jacob had a monument in this chapter too. Lot had one too, but his was a little different. Lot had a monument, but it was made of salt. It's interesting. You never read of Lot standing back, breaking his heart and saying, I'm so sorry.

I'm so sorry. I'm the cause of this. I'm the fault of it. My dear, I'm so sorry. Likely shed a rich old tear and on he went. That was Lot. You ever read where Lot went to Abraham and said, Uncle Abraham, I owe a lot to you.

Thanks. Thanks for rescuing me. Ever read it? Are we that big we sometimes can't thank people that have rescued us? There have been. There have been believers that have come to us and spoke to us about certain things.

Do you ever go to them and thank God that they rescued you from going out, from going back, from going down? And they prayed that you would go up. Now Jacob kind of levels off. The next few verses are pretty sad.

Here's Rachel. Lot of story in Rachel. Rachel's the one that comes and says, give me children or else I die. In other words, if I can have children, I'll die. She died bearing children. In other words, the price she was willing to pay, the price she was willing to pay to see salvation in her family was her own life.

Rachel's Death and the Pain of Bereavement

Mr. Brody Thibodeau, who is here with us and over Manchester with us, he won't mind me saying this. His aunt is in our assembly in Sussex. Yeah, our assembly. You got that, didn't you? I was like, where is it?

Tell him the other day. People say you can't say ours. You can't say your assembly. Oh, that's all. You're going to have a fight with James when you get to heaven. He says it's your assembly. But anyhow, she's in our assembly.

She came to me a number of years ago. She says her boy, Randy, works with our boys in a small business and he is their foreman. Not saved. Wife is saved in the assembly, an outsider. Daughter saved in the assembly.

Two boys are saved. Randy's not saved. In his forties. She came to me years ago and she said, Murray, it was after gospel meeting, I would give my right arm. God knows I mean it. I would give my right arm to see Randy saved.

She came to me just about six months ago and she says, I'll give my life. I'll give my life. She says, I have told Randy, Randy, my boy, if it means God taking me to see you saved, your mother's prepared to go.

Still not saved. She got her Benjamin, but a death takes place. I watched Jacob. Come on, brother, don't be so hard. Don't be so hard. I see him stooped over there and those tears splashing off that spade as he's digging a grave.

It was early. It was unexpected. He's got to commit those precious remains to mother earth. Now he would have, if he had hope in a resurrection, it was very little. He may have had some inkling, but it had, it was a hard one.

But what does he, what does he got to have? What's got to really happen here? He's, it's got to be a bereavement that is past. Okay, listen, I got some friends here and I hope I still got you at the end of the meeting.

Just be easy on me. It's not like the fellow that was visiting the graveyard and he looked over and he saw this fella and he could hear him. He'd been to his mother's grave, put some flowers there. He saw this over there fella saying, why did you die?

Why did you die? The man went to his car and he came back and he thought, I should go over and try and comfort that man. So he came back and he went over and he said, excuse me, sir. He said, I heard you.

Is this a grave of a child? No, he says, no. He says, you're saying, why did you die? Why did you die? He says, was it a parent? No, he says, it was my wife's first husband. We're still friends, aren't we?