Fathers： Make God Your Example — Zac Poonen

Okay. So today is Father's Day, it's being celebrated in many parts of the world. So I thought it was appropriate To share something about that. The first verse I would like to point out in this connection is the last two verses of the Old Testament Malachi 4 verse 5 and 6.

Restoring the Hearts of Fathers and Children

Here it's referring to the second coming of Christ and It says here. I'm going to send you Elijah the Prophet. Before the coming of the great and terrible day of the Lord He will restore the hearts of the fathers to their children.

And the hearts of the children to their fathers. So that I will not come and smite the land with a curse. It's interesting that the Old Testament ends with the word curse Just like the New Testament ends with the grace of our Lord Jesus Christ, but why this why does the Lord?

Threaten to smite the land with a curse it's because the relationship between fathers and children are not right and when we think of this is Something relating to the last days because it speaks about the great and terrible day of the Lord in verse 5 it's a prophecy and The Elijah spoken of here is the body of Christ the last days.

Elijah. When Jesus came they wondered if John the Baptist was Elijah and Jesus said no you haven't received him. So that's not the Elijah. It's the body of Christ. That's the Elijah and what is the body of God Christ going to emphasize and proclaim in the last days.

That the hearts of the fathers must be restored to the children and the hearts of the children Must be restored to the fathers, but it begins with the fathers very often we can blame our children's and they're not like this or Children are different and our children have a different temperament fathers I've heard in my life make all types of excuses why their children are wayward and They blame the temperament they blame surroundings they blame the friends and they blame very often everybody except themselves.

And that's why it doesn't go well so here It's good for fathers To say Lord. I see that This ministry has to begin with me. I Don't I can't expect the hearts of the children to be restored to the fathers before the hearts of the fathers are in a right way towards their children and When we turn to John's gospel chapter 1 we read that one of the main ministries of Jesus Christ.

Jesus Christ as the Perfect Revelation of the Father

We think of Christ coming to the earth to die for our sins but here it says One of the ministries of the of the Lord Jesus on earth throughout his life. His death on the cross was just for six hours at the end of his life.

But something he demonstrated throughout his life is written in John 1 18 Where it says no one has seen God at any time. But the only begotten God referring to Jesus Who is in the bosom of the father?

He has explained the father. So one of the ministries of Christ on earth was to explain the father not just with words But by his life. Towards the end of his life at the Last Supper we read in John 14 when One of his disciples asked him Philip said to him.

Please show us the father. John 14 verse 8 and Jesus said If you have seen me You've seen the father that's it verse 9 and Jesus had just washed the feet of the disciples at that time and He was referring to that action as well as well as to his whole life Of serving the poor helping the needy and he said if you have seen me you've seen the father.

The father is one who's willing to be like a slave to wash the feet of His disciples of all human beings. That's how God is and that's the pattern and that's the father that Jesus explained by his life and my dear brothers as fathers our calling is by our life to Demonstrate what our heavenly father is like just like Jesus demonstrated not just with words But by his life he demonstrated What God the father was like that is the great calling of fathers?

Fathers Must Depend on the Holy Spirit

It's a tremendous responsibility and it is impossible to fulfill it. If you're not filled with the Holy Spirit, if you don't have a daily cry in your heart Lord fill me with the Holy Spirit. Well, this will be a just another Father's Day that goes by and we will never be the type of fathers God wants us to be.

Many fathers have failed in the past. I think of I've met numerous fathers Whose children are grown-up teenagers or in their 20s and all those children are wayward. Not interested in following the Lord not serious about that Christian life even though they claim to be Christians and I tell such fathers don't get discouraged.

God is merciful. But you have to begin By acknowledging your fault and if you don't begin by acknowledging our faults God will not help us. So if you begin by acknowledging our faults, God can do anything.

There's no miracle that God cannot do. So one of the first things I want to say is from Matthew chapter 7 and verse 11. You know Jesus explained the father like this. He explained the father by his life as I said by his life of service and humility.

But in words he said in Matthew 7 verse 11 He looked at his disciples who were some of the best people on earth at that time. They had forsaken everything to follow Jesus and he looked at them. He looked at those disciples Who had left their nets and other jobs to follow him and he said to them If you Some of them were fathers like Peter if you Matthew 7 11 being evil.

He looked at them and said they were evil. In what way were they evil? They were excellent people the best on the earth at that time. But compared to their heavenly father. The best of them were evil fathers.

That's something for us to recognize if you being evil Fathers. Know how to give good gifts to your children. How much more will your father in heaven. Give what is good to those who ask him. So that's the first thing all of us fathers need to recognize.

I need to recognize. I've tried to recognize it to the best of my ability for many many years. From the first time I got a light on this verse. What is that? That compared to the goodness of God. The best father on earth is evil.

In other words, God is so good. There's no father that come come anywhere near him in comparison. Some of us think we are good fathers. You need to humble yourself and say Lord I'm not really a good father compared to you.

I've got a long way to go. If you keep thinking you're a good father, you'll never be the type of father God wants you to be. You have to say Lord God my father in heaven compared to you. I'm evil. I've said that to the Lord many times from the days when I was a young father Lord compared to you.

I'm an evil father. Make me like you. Make me like you. Make me like you. I'm not a good father compared to you. I want to be like you. Do you have a cry like that in your heart? It'll go well with you then and with your children so this is the first verse.

Representing God to Our Children

I want you to all of us to begin with and When we realize that our calling is Just like Jesus to represent the father to our children. So that as our children grow up and one day they grow up and leave home to go to college or go to work.

We should be able to say to them in a limited extent my dear sons and daughters. If you have seen me. You've seen a little bit of what God the Father is like. The type of father I have been they're not perfect.

But in my attitude to you in the way, I taught you and the way I behaved with you and the way I related to you. You've seen a little bit of What God our Heavenly Father is like? Take that as a challenge and if you have failed in that no problem.

Just go to God. And say Lord I failed. I'm sorry, I never had light on this. But I understand today something what it means to be a father. Please help me forgive my times of ignorance Acts 17 verse 30 today.

I repent and we repent means I turn around. I want to be able to Explain you to my children by my language by my life. By the way, I spend money by the way I do everything. Help me to explain you. To our children that is one of the main lessons we need to learn on Father's Day, I will say the main lesson and if you want to do it You've got to ask God to fill you with the Holy Spirit.

The Holy Spirit is called the spirit of the father the spirit of the father and When he fills me He will make me a good father. So, I don't know how many of you fathers. See your weakness and cry out to God.

For the fullness of the Holy Spirit. Think of a very poor person who has no bank account and who has already got zero in his bank account or very little and His rent is due. He has to pay his rent and he doesn't have any money.

He cries out for help to God. Oh God, please provide for me. That's the way we should cry out in helplessness. Lord, how many times we cry out to God in helplessness when our children are sick or some problem arises?

Well in the same way we need to pray Lord. You may not be facing any sickness problem a financial problem in in your family right now. But what about being a good father. Doesn't that drive you to. Doesn't that bring a sense of need in you?

That drives you to God just like if you are in a financial problem or there was some serious sickness in your house. It should Lord, I don't have any sickness in my home. I don't have any financial need in your home.

But I'm in desperate need of being a good father. And I want to cry out to you. Just like if there was a terrible financial need in this house, or there was some terrible sickness in this house I want to be a good father and I cannot do it Lord.

Please fill me with your Holy Spirit. I pray that cry in your heart. I've had that cry in my heart for a long long time. Because I knew one thing I could never never be the type of father that God wanted me to be.

When I look back at my life, I think of so many mistakes I've made. But I always would pray Lord help me help me and the Bible says God hears the cry of the needy. I Want to turn you to a verse which has been a great blessing to me as a Christian and as a father and in in my ministry in Preaching the word and in all types of situations and especially as a father.

Prayerful Dependence and God’s Promise to the Needy

Isaiah chapter 41. I want you to turn peace with me to Isaiah 41 When we are praying to God To crying out to him to help us to become better fathers to represent him to our children. Here is how we should pray and here is the promise.

We should claim Isaiah 41 and verse 17 The afflicted and needy the word needy. This is the word that comes to me here those who are needy. When the needy are seeking water Lord, I'm needy. I'm I have a great need to be a good father, and I'm seeking for the power of the Holy Spirit and My tongue is parched with thirst.

I the Lord will answer them myself as God. I will not forsake them. Look at that promise. But brother you got to be needy. I will open rivers on the Bear Heights. I'll tell you something. As I've cried to God for many many years in my life.

And I continue to cry to God even today not only to be a physical father to my children. To be a good grandfather to my grandchildren, but also to be a spiritual father to so many people In a number of countries who look up to me.

I say Lord. I am needy. My tongue is parched with thirst. Crying out to you, and you're promised to answer me. I want to believe you. You will not forsake me. It says here. You will open rivers where there are Bear Heights now.

You will bring springs in the midst of the valley. You'll make a wilderness. You make a wilderness into a pool of water and The dry land will become fountains of water. Think of this as promises God is making to you to make you a better father, I will put a cedar in the wilderness and Then verse 20 they will see and recognize and consider and gain insight that the hand of the Lord Has done this and so the Lord says present your case to me.

Bring forward your strong arguments. What are our strong arguments? Lord I'm a needy person. I don't know what it is to be a good father to represent you. It's way beyond my ability. So I pray that you will help me because I'm probably the most desperate person in the whole world.

I present my case. I'm more needy Lord. You got to help me. That's what it means to be needy if you think you're a pretty good father, and you think you're better than others. Well. You may go down to the end of the line but if you feel a desperate need that you've been a failure so far and You're desperately needy to be a good father.

You'll come to the front of the line and God will answer your prayer first. I want to be there in the front of the line, and I've discovered through my life and in whatever area I have a need to be in the front of the line to get God's answer quickly is To feel that I am the most needy person of all in whatever area.

I'm asking. Yeah, that's the secret. Consider yourself to be the most needy person don't compare yourself with others and think you're better. Think you're worse. Then you'll be in the front of the line the last shall always be the first remember.

That's God's law in his kingdom. So it's just like you know a helpless child think of a little child who cannot do anything for himself. He cannot even go to the restroom himself. Doesn't know how to put on his clothes, and he's desperately depending on his parents for everything Jesus said be like little children.

That's the mark of humility. To always have a sense of need or the other picture Jesus used of the branch in the tree. I love to think of these examples. I always think of them myself. I say Lord I'm like a one two-year-old child so many things.

I don't know and I'm like a branch in a tree absolutely helpless without the sap coming from the tree. I Believe that's why God's helped me so much in my life in my ministry in my home and my relationship with my wife and my Children.

I am a needy person. I am the most needy person Lord in the world. I'm not the type of father. I should be I I'm the most needy. I'm at the end of the line. I'm the last and the Lord says come up to the front of the line.

You're the most needy. I'll meet your need and he has met my need again and again and again in every area I've sought to him, so what is the secret he meets the poor and the needy first. If anyone thirst Jesus said in John 7 37 let him come to me and drink and I will make rivers of living water.

Flow from his innermost being. So I want to ask you dear brothers fathers, are you needy today? Are you so thirsty that you come to God and say Lord you got to meet with me if so Here is a promise for you from Luke chapter 11.

Luke chapter 11. This is the parable Jesus said Of a person verse 5 who went to his friend's house. Luke 11 verse 5 He goes to his friend's house at midnight, this is a picture of a man going to his heavenly father in prayer.

And saying please my friend lend me three loaves. Because a friend of mine has come to my at home, and I've got nothing to set before him. Read read those words. I Have nothing to set before him. Here is a father.

Picture it a father going to God. That's the explanation of this parable. Saying heavenly father I Have two children at home four children at home six children at home. Whatever number of children you have and I don't have I provide them food clothing shelter.

But the most important thing how they should grow up to be disciples of Jesus. I don't have anything to set before them. I Have nothing Lord to set before them. All the things of the world I can give them but spiritual riches.

I don't have it. If you think you have it you won't pray like that. It's the one who recognizes needy say father, please give me and From inside that in the parable the man says don't bother me. I can't come to you give you no, and he says I'm not gonna give him.

I'm gonna keep on banging the door till you wake up and give it to me. And Jesus said Because of his verse 8 because of his persistence He will get up and give him as much as he needs now you fathers.

Take that as a promise from God today. You come to him in your need and say Lord. I've got children at home I I want to bring them all up to be wholehearted disciples of Jesus when they grow up and leave my home, and I don't have what it takes and I don't hear an answer.

Well, I don't care. I'm gonna keep banging till I get an answer. I'm gonna keep knocking knocking knocking knocking. That's what Jesus said because of his persistence verse 8. What will you get it says here verse 8 as much as you need?

To be a good father as Much as you need he will give it to you because of his persistence. I think all of us have probably prayed once or twice in our life or maybe five or ten times made me a good father.

But this is not talking about such people who once in a while go and knock at the door. But who keep on knocking and don't give up until they get. Until they get and they feed their children and they begin to see the results in their children.

That's when you know God has given you and so Jesus said verse 9 Luke 11 9 ask like this. Like this man asked and it will definitely be given you. It's a promise seek like this and You will definitely Find not like this keep on knocking it will definitely be open to you.

What more promise do you want brother? Everyone who asks like this Will receive and everyone who seeks like this will find and Everyone who knocks like this it will be opened now, you know, he's talking about fathers.

See the next verse. See, for example you fathers if your son asked for a fish, will you give him a snake? No, he's talking about fathers and If he asked for an egg, will you give him a scorpion? No, if you being evil Lord I'm not a good father.

No, but I know to give good earthly gifts to my children. How much more Will your heavenly father give? The Holy Spirit's power. To be a good father. To whom. To those who ask like this. To those who seek like this.

To those who knock like this. Those who wake up in the middle of the night in their beds and cry out and say Oh God I've failed as a father. Please help me. How many of you have done that? Have you ever done that even once.

There are many nights in my life where I wake up in the middle of the night I cry out to God saying God help me to be what you want me to be. Many many nights in my life. I've seen my need. I see my need day and night.

Even to preach the word. I never get up to preach the word saying. Oh, well, I've been preaching for 56 years. I can handle it. No, I can't handle it. Lord, if you don't give me the words, I'll be dumb or whatever.

I say will be just human cleverness. Which won't reach people's hearts. It'll reach their minds instruct them and they think they've got something when all they got was human garbage. The cleverness of man is all human garbage Lord.

They won't get a word from you. So I want to be always Thirsty. I want to be like that man. That I've often spoken of in Proverbs chapter 8 and verse. I'm talking about the type of father who Christ goes to God.

Proverbs 8 34. Blessed is let me read it like this. Blessed is the father. Blessed is the father Proverbs 8 34 who comes to my gates Every day daily and waits at my doorposts and seeks me. For help to be a good father, he will find life.

You get an answer. He looked in favor From the Lord. So that's where we begin in our relationship with God. That's our foundation and then the scripture says With the power that God gives of the power of the Holy Spirit.

Training Children in Obedience and Godliness

Proverbs 22 and Verse 6 is an amazing promise. Amazing promise. Train up a child. Proverbs 22 verse 6. In the way, he should go and when he's old he will not. Not he might not. Depends on your faith. I believe he will not.

Why not say what God's Word says? If I train up a child in the way God teaches me to train him. When he grows up he will not go away from that. I often quote the example of Moses. His mother his father was a slave working day and night and hardly ever saw the little child because he went to work when early morning when more little baby Moses was still asleep and Came back by the time he came home Moses had gone to sleep again.

So it was the mother Moses mother Jacobet who brought him up and instilled such values into that little boy. Before she sent him into Pharaoh's palace that 30 -35 years later when he's 40 years old. He says I Don't want the riches of Egypt.

I don't want the honor of Egypt. I don't want the pleasures of Egypt boy. If you can bring up your child like that the 35 years later Wherever he is. He'll say I will not seek the honor and the wealth and the pleasure of this world.

You've done a great job. Train up a child in the way you should go. He will not depart from it so that's a great promise for us to begin and if you want to do that, you know all training you think of.

People who go to a gym that word train train. It's a word that refers to the gym where people go to exercise to build up their muscles and Training takes time. You can't go for a five-minute visit to a gym every day and expect to build muscles.

You have to take time training takes time and so a father who wants to bring up his children in the proper way. Must say Lord. I'm willing to spend time. We all have time. Many of us say no. No, I'm so busy.

I don't have time. I've heard people tell me I don't have time to read the Bible. I'm so busy. No, you're not. Think if your child is suddenly sick and admitted in hospital. You'll suddenly make time to go to the hospital.

Where did you get that extra time from you made time? Even though you were busy. It's like that, you know, if we want to make time for something we will cut out certain other things in our daily program.

Which are not so essential and we will spend time with our children. We'll allow our hearts to be drawn to the children so that the children's hearts can be drawn to us. Be careful dear brothers in the days in which we live.

We have told warned very clearly in Malachi that fathers and children will drift apart and we need to come together very very important. So we can take an example from God himself. God is the first father described in the Bible and he treated Adam like his son.

In fact in Luke chapter 3 the last words Adam is called a son of God. So here was the father. That two things I see here he Where Adam failed God wanted him to obey. That's all he didn't want Adam to be clever or any such thing.

He wanted him to obey. It was obedience which God wanted to teach Adam and that is why he sent him into a garden and The obedience was not difficult. There were thousands of trees in that garden and the God did not tell Adam.

Well, these are the six thousand eight hundred trees that you must not touch. No. He said there are thousands of trees. I'm asking you don't touch one tree. That is not a difficult command. To train up a child with obedience in the little things we don't give them 10 ,000 commands in little things.

That's the first thing God wanted Adam to learn obedience and That's what we need to teach our children. The first commandment for children is honor your father and mother. Ephesians 6 interprets it as children obey your parents.

Because that is the first commandment that has a promise honor your father and mother and it will go well with you. Do you want it to go well with your children teach them to obey their parents teach them to speak?

Respectfully to their parents never take lightly when they speak disrespectfully to father or mother immediately pull them up. I Would never tolerate my children speaking even For a little while even with one word disrespectfully to the parents with the why.

Because I love them so much. I wanted to go well with them. I Would teach them obedience obey your parents. Even if you can't understand why you obey your parents so that's the first thing and Adam failed and The second thing I see here.

Teaching Truthfulness, Humility, and Mercy

Where Adam failed was in speaking the truth that's the second thing God wants us to teach our children and see here in Genesis and chapter 3 and Yeah, it's here the Lord God came to him in the garden we read and asked him a simple question.

Did you eat. This is Genesis 3 in verse 11. Have you eaten of the tree of which I commanded you not to eat and he told a lie. This is the man's failure disobedience to a clear command of God and secondly telling lies.

So I've seen these are the two things we need to teach our children first of all. That's what I taught my own children when they were small most important Mathematics science History all that is secondary first of all obey your parents and second always be truthful.

Even if you did the worst possible thing I say come and tell me the truth. Don't ever try to deceive me. Don't ever tell me a lie, it doesn't. I will not punish you if you tell me the truth. I Can forgive everything but don't tell me a lie your father's be like this because these are the two areas where Adam failed as a son of God and That's what brought all the chaos into the world and we see the example of Jesus.

We read in Luke chapter 2. This is the example I always tell little children. I say if you want to follow Jesus, we teach our children to follow Jesus. I say you can follow Jesus. You don't have to be 30 years old.

You can follow Jesus, even if you are 3 years old. Because it says about Jesus when he was a little boy. In Nazareth in Luke chapter 2 verse 51. Luke chapter 2 verse 51. He was subject to Joseph and Mary.

All the 30 years he was there Joseph died, but then he was subject to Mary. Now the interesting thing here is Joseph and Mary were imperfect and yet Jesus submitted to them. So don't get discouraged if you're imperfect father, it doesn't matter.

I say I'm an imperfect father like Joseph. But Jesus obeyed Joseph and I tell my children you got to obey me. It's not because I'm a perfect father. No Joseph was not at all a perfect father. But Jesus it says here continued in subjection to him.

Mary was not a perfect mother. I'll tell you why. Because there's no one perfect on earth. They were imperfect they were under the old covenant. They didn't even have the new covenant of promise of sin shall not have dominion over you.

They didn't have the Holy Spirit dwelling within them. Can you imagine how imperfect they were as parents? Do you think they yelled at each other? I'm sure they did. They argue with each other sure and little.

Jesus saw it, but he did not despise them. He respected them and submitted to them. What an example even if your parents are imperfect I tell children you must respect and obey your parents honor your father and mother.

So that that's the thing that we see here. The other thing I find with children is the disobedience one. Telling lies the second thing and the third thing I find very often in children is despising others.

Children somehow develop the habit of Despising and looking down on others making fun of those who are Maybe a little awkward or don't speak properly or have some habit, which is not good. Don't encourage that in your children, please.

And something they try to make you laugh by making fun of somebody else. Sometimes a trait in another person which that person cannot change. You know, there are people who have habits and traits in them, which they cannot change and don't let your children ever despise them.

No, correct them. If you don't correct them, or you just join with them and say haha. Yeah, that's funny. Children are gonna grow up despising people and they think they themselves are very smart and capable and the other guy is crazy and foolish and No.

Teach them humility from a very young age and one mark of a humble person is he despises nobody. God is our Heavenly Father. What does the Bible say? I want you to turn to the book of Job in the book of Job.

We read this Job chapter 36. These are the words of Elihu. Elihu was the one person who spoke to Job whom God did not have to correct. The other three friends of Job got corrected. But Elihu God did not correct and one of the good things Elihu said he knew really knew God.

He says an amazing statement, which is not found anywhere else in the Bible, but which is true. Job 36 5 we need to teach our children God is Almighty. Yeah, we teach our children that. But he does not despise anybody.

There's one person who could despise people it was God. He's perfect and everybody's imperfect. We are imperfect people where we got the right to despise other imperfect people, but here's a perfect God Almighty, but he does not despise anybody.

And this is the way we could explain it to our children. Here on my right side is God there so far away perfect and Never despising anybody and here on my left side is the other extremist Satan imperfect despising everyone.

That's what the devil is. He despises everyone and here's God despising. No one and all of us are in between. How do I know I'm getting closer to God. I I Despise people less and less and less and less.

I come to the place where I don't despise people. I'm becoming like God the father. But if I'm just despising people more and more I'm becoming like the devil. You're going closer to the devil when you despise people because he despises everyone.

If you want to be like God press on towards a place where you despise no one. It's very important because I find that all over the world children have the habit of Despising and making fun and laughing at people's habits and accents and all types of things.

We've got to be very very careful. See God was very merciful he didn't just Yell at Adam and Eve and say get out. No. One beautiful thing we see here is that he saw their need this fallen couple. It says here He killed an animal Made a sacrifice for their sin right there shed blood.

Blood was first shed in Eden. He killed an animal and took the skin of that animal in Genesis 3 verse 21 and made a Skin dress for Adam and another one for his wife. What does that show God's tremendous mercy?

On somebody who had failed and that's what people need to see in us. Our children need to see that we are merciful we're not judgmental. God's been so merciful to us and we need to be merciful to our children and we Cannot correct them if we have not learned to encourage them.

Encouragement and Discipline in Fatherhood

I've often used this example. That encouragement is the blackboard on which we can take the chalk of correction and Write the fault. That we see in our children one characteristic of God Is mentioned in Romans 15 and verse 5.

Do you know that this is one of the titles of God? There are many titles given to God and one of the titles given to God our father is Romans 15 and verse 5. A God who gives Encouragement. Have you seen that title of God.

A God who gives encouragement. We all want to be like the Lord right. I want to be Like my heavenly father the God who gives encouragement. I Want my children to grow up and say? My dad encouraged me.

When I bungled and made a mistake and failed my dad encouraged me, I hope your children will say that about you. He corrected me sure because that's the other Aspect of God and that is mentioned in Hebrews and chapter 12 and that is he's a God who disciplines us.

He says in Hebrews 12 and verse 7 when God disciplines you He's dealing with you as a son. He's a father who disciplines. So here are two titles of God a father who disciplines from Hebrews 12 and verse 7 and a father who encourages.