What a Man Is Not — Paul Washer

Let's go the Lord in prayer. Father I come before you in the name of your son father. I pray that through your word Through your spirit that these men will be helped. They will grow in Christ. They will grow in integrity.

They will grow according to your creative order of things. They would assume. The place that you have given them. Father I ask this in Jesus name. Amen. All right, just to get started. Let's just take a look if you have a bible take a look at proverbs 13.

Wisdom, Youth, and the Influence of Companions

Okay proverbs chapter 13 verse 20. He who walks with wise men will be wise. But the companion of fools will suffer harm. Now here's what I want you to see. All throughout the book of proverbs we have certain terms that seem to indicate the same person a fool someone who is naive a simpleton and a youth.

And here's what we need to see even though it might ruffle our feathers a little bit. The bible assumes that if you're young. You do not have wisdom. And the real the reason it assumes that is because wisdom is not something you're born with.

As a matter of fact, you're born with just the opposite. Bible teaches us that foolishness is bound up in the heart of the child and. So what you need to see. Is that in youth in being young? Comes with it the idea of foolishness.

Of not possessing wisdom of not knowing how to act now. If you go into many places in the world, especially tribal areas. If we could get in a time machine and we could go back in time we'd see something very different from what we see today very very different.

And we would see men training boys. We would see boys not being with boys. Hardly ever being with other boys. We would hardly ever see a young man with young men. Was considered basically a taboo. Was wrong.

Why? This passage it would promote foolishness. A fool plus a fool does not equal a wise man. And so when you get a bunch of fools all together going in the same direction you just have absolute Foolishness to the nth degree.

Now even outside of biblical cultures, you can see this now. Why? Do we put young men together today? I mean from the time they're in preschool. To the time even post-college. Young men are with young men and the greatest influence in a young man's life is other young men.

Why do we do that? And not only do they do it in a secular world. They do it in the church. For example, you go you're four years old you go to church. They put you in a sunday school class with other boys your age usually led by a woman.

When you reach teenage years, they put you with other teenagers. As a matter of fact, you can go through the entire christian culture in the west and never have a man influence you. Why is that? It's because We have been warped by unbiblical principles.

And it would be enough if those unbiblical principles were just in our culture. But the fact is the church is more influenced by the culture than the culture is the church. As a matter of fact, we've even come to the point where we try to build churches around culture.

Instead of building churches around the bible so that they can stand against culture. Now, let's just look at a few things. First of all. Many of you probably heard this terminology generation gap generation gap.

That comes out of my era even a little bit before my era. This is early 60s. It's generation gap up to that point no. There was no such thing as a generation gap. Started in the 50s with what we call youth rebellion the marlon brando type the james dean.

This conflict between the younger generation and the older generation to the point where it evolves now where if you look at media a movie or Television not only do you see a separation between the adult and the young but the adults always appear as foolish As not knowing anything.

And the young people are the ones who end up instructing the adults completely the reverse of scripture now if you want To not be christian. And you even want to stand outside of secular history and you want to go with that flow.

That's your prerogative. That's your choice. But what you need to know is it's not christian. And societies were never built on such things today the child the boy leads the man. Now I want to talk for a moment about just the generation gap.

What is it built upon? Actually, it's built upon the theory of evolution. That what we see in a macrocosm. Of a development of from specie to specie has been put into a microcosm. In that that's the way children are developed.

The fact is it's founded upon theory. It's not founded upon fact and even if you accept evolution as fact, which I don't. It's still a major jump to go from there to the microcosm of just the development of a human being now.

Education, Family, and Cultural Formation

Our educational system has been Developed by certain names as probably you're familiar with dewey Rousseau. People like that now, what did they believe? Well, first of all, they were Anti-christian from the word go.

They were pro-evolution from the word go they were anti-family to the point where Rousseau Uh, he didn't even know the gender of his last child because the moment a child was born into his family. He turned it over to a government institution.

Which is exactly what's being done today public education public institutions. We have two parents chasing the american dream. And so the moment the child is born after six weeks or so or six months. The mom goes back to work.

The child goes to what? Pre-care preschool. And stays within the arms of a government institution until it graduates from college. And so we have literally thousands upon thousands upon thousands of hours Of formal education and everything secular and anti-christian.

Not to mention media in which the child may watch three hours or more of media. Every day of his life and then you wonder why has our culture gone bad? Now I want you to realize something i'm not talking about somebody out there i'm talking about you.

And i'm talking about myself something that I had to fight out of and still must fight to remain outside of it. That we are a product of our culture. We have turned our children over to caesar. And therefore we have followers of caesar.

Within the church. There's no difference. We do the same thing. Now another reason for that Is not just our educational system, but there's something That seems a bit more mundane. Something not quite as bad.

But actually it is When when my dad came out of world war ii. Okay, he was a child of the depression. He lived through the depression, you know 10 years old selling newspapers on the streets of detroit just to buy food.

Then he goes into world war ii. He fights takes on an empire sees most of his friends die comes back and because of the prosperity that the war caused economic prosperity. Then what was it i'm going to give my children things I never had.

And so what happened we lost our fathers in their Passion to give their children things that they never had and we lost our mothers. Because see our mothers all went into the factories to build bombs and airplanes and everything else.

While our fathers were fighting over in world war ii. The problem is when the war was over our moms didn't come home. And so what basically has happened is this we have been raised by an anti-christian public or government institution.

We have not been with wise men. But ever since we were little we were thrown into a group Of collective fools. And We look at our examples and they're the same ages that we are and we grow up in that all our life to the point where you have men who are 30 34 years old and they still get together and their big thing is playing video games or some kind of nfl fantasy game or something.

You see and so You've lost manhood. Now, let me give you an example there may be some of you who can say no this isn't true with me. So praise god if that's the case. But most of you spent more time With young men your own age than you did your own father.

Most of you after a few years in the public school system. As a matter of fact your mother and father and especially your siblings your brothers and your sisters just got in your way. You were only in house a long enough but but to eat and sleep, but you wanted to be with your friends.

That's all you wanted to be with and even now when you may be in your 20s. It's the same thing just want to be with your friends. So we have sitcoms that are very very popular friends. Just be with Your friends and so you're with your friends.

There's no family the home becomes something like a condo. Where people just come to and eat go to their room sleep. Play video games remove from the rest of the family. And then go out to see their friends.

The Family and the Church as Institutions of Manhood

And so what we have seen is literally the destruction Of our civilization. When I was a my first year first year student In political science, we were taught that there were certain institutions. Didn't matter if you're liberal Conservative.

Whatever there are certain institutions that must exist in order for a society to exist. And if you want to destroy that society you remove those institutions. That's all you have to do and one of those institutions.

As a matter of fact, one of the most important is family. You destroy the family. So we live in an age right now. Where even though mom and dad may stay together. If you look at what the family is. It's not a family compared to scripture.

Now, let me give you another example the bible says that uh fathers Are to be the greatest influences in the lives of their sons and daughters in every shape form and fashion. And we'll maybe talk about that later, but the bible also says that in church.

The people who are to minister to every individual in the church are elders. These are men Who meet certain qualifications according to first timothy chapter three titus chapter one. They are mature men of god.

They're men. Most of you never came in contact with one. You went to sunday school you went to children's church. There were no elders. You went to youth group and it was just a young guy a little bit older than you with moose in his hair great personality.

Who didn't know anything? Do you see? And so. The main influence in the family is to be the father that was removed from you. The main influence in the church Is to be the elders. And you probably never even saw one.

And so what do we have we have removed everything. Manhood is something that is taught. Manhood is something that is learned by imitation, but they've taken all the men out of your life. Probably for some of you the most memorable man in your life is your coach.

Because he was the only one who acted in any way with a masculine authority In your life. So now you see. And here's the sad thing. You're going to go back to church. And this is just going to continue on.

Unless some great changes are made. We have lost men in the west. A few uh weeks ago. I was talking to a good friend of mine. You may know him voddie bockham. And he called me says why she goes man this this article just came out.

I don't know if it's in time magazine or what it was. I want I got to send it to you. He hasn't sent it to me yet. But i've been out of the country, but he says even the secular authorities now are saying there's no men.

That america has no men. It's a crisis it's a crisis now, there are a lot of things that are your fault. But in this case I can honestly say. Because of a lack of knowledge on a part of a whole lot of people your lives are not What they could be real manhood.

And that's what we need to talk about today. Now the problem is is it's going to take more than two times tonight and one time tomorrow morning. And i'm going to get started on some things but um. These are things that you're going to have to pursue.

You're going to have to realize something that I realized several years ago. Not from an epiphany or some vision just by studying the scriptures. One day it just hit me. Everything is wrong. And it's not a case of just tweaking the system.

See that's the problem. It's blowing it to pieces. Starting all over again. Now that kind of language is very dangerous. That's the way cults get started. But let me share with you something. It's a principle of biblical hermeneutics and I want you to understand this biblical hermeneutics is the science of how you study the bible.

Biblical Hermeneutics, Church History, and Tradition

And there is a principle in biblical hermeneutics. It states this. You should always do your theology in the context of church. What does that mean? It means if a god like me stands up and says Everything is wrong right now with regard to family young men everything and we've got to change it.

If you ask me the question, why do you say that. I say because that's what the bible says. But if you ask me and how do you know the bible says that? Because everyone else is just happy with what's going on.

So what right do you have to say that the bible contradicts our western way of doing church? Well I appeal to history. See, that's why they don't want you to study history. If I appeal to history and I look down through 2 000 years of christianity and I see that there there are theological and doctrinal trends.

That this is the way they did things. This is the way they interpreted the bible and then I come till today. And I recognize that today the church today contradicts 2 000 years of christian history. Who's wrong.

See I can appeal to history. And say we're just wrong. We're just wrong. In many of the puritan churches you could actually as a man Be removed from the membership publicly disciplined. If you did not catechize your own children.

If you were not the primary theological doctrinal religious teacher of your children. You would be admonished before the church for failure. For being a derelict father. But now I want you to think of something if I walked into a typical church today and I said Okay, how many of you men Are consistently let's say four times a week at least.

And for a half an hour hour. Each time that you are teaching your children the scriptures. Almost no one would raise their hand. Now that's a bare minimum and almost no one would raise their hand and no one would have a problem with it.

But if I then stood up and said and as the new pastor, I am going to cancel youth group. We're no longer going to have youth group. We're no longer going to have sunday school. We're no longer going to have children's church.

What would they do to me? They'd fire me immediately, wouldn't they? I mean there would be such a battle going on. They would say that man hates children. That man hates youth. Well, look what we have Jesus said.

You annul the commandments. In order to carry out your traditions. Nowhere in scripture are fathers commanded to turn over the religious education of their children to a church. But all over the scriptures fathers are commanded to disciple their own children to disciple their own wives.

To pour their lives into their family for the cause of christ. So we will keep our traditions and we will kill anybody that comes up with scripture and says you're wrong. You see how easy it is. Just to be following a tradition.

And not following the scriptures. Well, this is the way we've always done it. Yeah, it is in your generation. And it's wrong. It's wrong. Just the idea of what we have here. In proverbs 13 20 where it says he who walks with wise men will be wise.

And what else does it say but the companion of fools will suffer harm. Now I want us to go i've brought some notes here and what i'm going to do instead of just trying to hit the best things I can hit i'm going to just start.

Theologically plowing some ground with you. If we don't even get close to finish we don't get close to finish. But I want you to know i'm willing to come back and do this again anytime. But we are going to look at a lot of things that at first you're going to say I don't know if this applies.

It does. Because I can't just jump over here to what you need without laying a foundation first. Okay. Now the first thing I want to do is we need to look at our reality as people. We just need to look at our present reality.

Theological and Cultural Ignorance

Now in order to start this off, let me just give you an illustration from my past. I uh, I studied theology, of course have my master's in theology studied greek hebrew logic all kinds of things philosophy in the university.

Now several years ago. A friend of mine sent me a book from british. He's in british columbia. And he sent me a book and he said read this it was on logic. So I opened up and I read the first chapter.

And I read through the first chapter three times. I said, okay, I understand the terminology. I understand the definitions he's put to the terminology and now I can dialogue with this person. It was higher logic than anything.

I had studied in the university. Well after reading that chapter, I closed the book. I went in the kitchen to get me something to eat. I came back and I happened to look at the cover of the book. And it was like a an ink sketch drawing on the cover of the book and I thought well.

That's unusual. Because it had what looked to be eight nine-year-old children standing in a line with a school master over them drilling them. And I thought why would that be on the front of the book so I opened up to the preface started reading it was the Logic primer for grade school children in the colonial period.

You need to let that seek Sink in to your head and your heart. And and I don't want to be offensive. I'm going to include myself in this and i've been fighting my my way out of this for years. We are an ignorant people.

We are an ignorant people. If I went back only 200 years I could probably sit down with many many 10 and 12 year olds and discuss theology that probably many of us have never even heard. We are theologically and doctrinally Ignorant people we are technically advanced but historically philosophically.

Logically, no. I was once talking to someone in a university on the matter of genetics. After a lecture that I gave. And someone said to me afterwards. They said what do you do? You just study all the time.

And how did you talk to that guy? I said if you notice I didn't talk to him. Well, yes, you did. I said no. I asked him questions. Yeah, but he left mad. I said yes he did. And he said well, how did you do that?

I said I don't know anything about genetics. Well, what do you know about. I said I I know logic. I Know one simple principle that defeated many of the things he was saying the law of non-contradiction.

Something cannot be something and not be something in the same way at the same time. If I were to go to your generation and I would have say with a microphone. What do you think about the war in iraq?

You'd say all kinds of things. Most of it would just be parroting what popular media says. But you would say all kinds of things. I'd get all kinds of opinions at your university, but after. Someone gave their opinion and I said what is the basis of your opinion?

What works have you studied on middle eastern politics. Well. Nothing. What have you studied on economics in the middle east? Nothing the theory of war. What have you studied and I could just keep going.

I said, can you quote primary sources? You see the fact is we're a people who are quick to give our opinion. But usually it's only to jump on the bandwagon of what everyone else is saying. Because we long for approval.

And see what I want you to see is we're a culture like this again technologically advanced. I think there's more stuff In a calculator a texas instrument calculator than they had to put the first man on the moon.

We are technologically advanced, but we don't read. We don't know history. We don't question ourselves about the big things that really matter. And as a culture, we're just following one another. Let me give you just one more example.

Now. I'm not against swimming. Okay, and i'm not against going to the beach necessarily. It's just that some beaches you will have to be blind if you're going to go there. But here's something I want you to just think about.

What a christian in your youth group Would wear to the beach now. And everyone would be okay with that. 75 years ago if someone went out in public like that the secular authorities Would have had them arrested and either find them put them in jail or send them to an institution to be examined.

That's 75 years and i'm not saying right or wrong. I just want you to see something. What christians totally approve of today only 75 years ago unbelievers thought it was either illegal or insane. Shouldn't that make you think?

Man, what on earth? Where are we going to find some ground to stand on? If all this is shifting so fast and everything is changing. What do we stand on we stand on god's word? We stand on god's word now.

Authority, Scripture, and the Present Reality

I want us to look at our present reality. I'm, just going to quote some verses to you. What I can do is I can give these notes to doug doug can Print them off or whatever so you don't have to be writing like crazy.

But I just want to read some verses to you judges 17 6 in those days. There was no king in israel. Every man did what was right in his own eyes. There was no king. It means there was no authority. And when there was no standard authority cross the board authority everyone just did what is right in their own eyes.

Let me give you an example just in church life. How many of you've heard the argument of the regulative normative principle? Probably. Probably no one. And yet that was one of the that's been one of the greatest arguments down through the history of the church.

And the question is this. The regulative principle says we can only do in church what god specifically commands. Normative principle says we can do in church anything that god does not specifically prohibit.

Do you realize that today? No one even argues about it. Why? Because every sort of thing is done without even Asking the bible. What should a church look like as a matter of fact churches are built today by going out into the community finding out what they?

Want in a church and then giving it to them and calling it a church. So you see we have no authority. If you believe that the scriptures are infallible or they are inspired you have only fought half the battle.

Only half the battle. The second question is this are they sufficient? Do I have to go outside of scripture to find what god wants. For his people. For my life for faith for morality. Well, the teaching of scripture is absolutely not.

But you see you probably are recognizing even right now almost everything that we do as a people is done without authority. Almost everything done in the church is done without authority. You just live your life.

Basically the way that you think you ought to live it. This was the puritan genius. Now I know that a lot of you've heard a lot of bad things about the puritans. But I would challenge anyone to give primary sources on the matter.

But the puritan genius even though I wouldn't agree with them in all things was this they asked the question. How do I apply scripture to every aspect of my life. We don't ask that question anymore. Let's go on hosea 6 4 6 my people are destroyed for a lack of knowledge.

It's true um I could take you out into the amazon. Uh way in the in what's called the monte or the outback as far from the rivers as you can get. Because the farther you get away from the rivers the more jungle it becomes.

All right, you will die in a matter of a couple of days. Unless you're with someone who knows what he's doing. That's the only reason i've been able to be in so many Bad places it's not because i'm bear grills.

It's because i'm always with Indians who know exactly what they're doing and I follow them in everything. They tell me. Do you see. But when you don't have knowledge about a certain thing and you're not following someone who does then you're destroyed for a lack of knowledge.

Isaiah 1 4 through 6 it says this a last sinful nation people weighed down with iniquity. Offspring of evildoers sons who act corruptly they have abandoned the lord. They have despised the holy one of israel.

They have turned away from him. Where will you be stricken again as you continue in your rebellion? The whole head is sick and the whole heart is faint from the sole of the foot even to the head. There is nothing sound in it only bruises welts raw wounds not pressed out or bandaged nor softened with oil.

That's our society and that's the church. Or what's called a church today? What's called a church today? Why. Because we have turned away? From the word of god now I want us Recognizing what we're in.

Living for the Glory of God

I want us to recognize what we're supposed to be doing. We must be convinced. Now if you're not christian and you've decided that that christ and all of this is a hoax. And you desire to live according to your own wisdom.

You have that prerogative. But if you are going to call yourself christian, then you have to make some serious decisions. First of all, we must be convinced that everything we do is to be for the glory of god.

Absolutely everything. We have first corinthians 10 31 whether then you eat or drink or whatever you do do all for the glory of god. Absolutely everything for his glory everything. And you cannot do it for his glory apart from knowing what he commanded.

Okay, we have cases all throughout scripture where people did things That would that were wise in their own eyes. Thinking it would abound to the glory of god only to recognize they were fighting against god.

Also second corinthians 10 5. We are destroying speculation and every lofty thing raised against the knowledge of god. And we are taking every thought captive to the obedience of christ. Not only are we to glorify god in every deed we're to glorify god in every thought.

My thoughts are to be held captive are to be brought into obedience to christ now. Let me just say something. Here someone might argue. Well, you know, it sounds like slavery. It sounds like the end of free thinking and all these different things.

Well, you probably don't remember this singer. But there was a guy by the name of bob dylan several several years ago back in my time who said things like You got to serve somebody. You are going to serve somebody.

You are going to be a prisoner to someone's worldview. It's just going to happen. I'm sorry. And what's funny is the people who most boast about breaking free? From everybody else's worldview they gather together with their own worldview and in that they try to please each other.

It's absolutely amazing. And we talk about free will you need to understand something? Theologically, there's only one person who's free and that's god. There's only one who makes decisions without being manipulated or coerced.

You don't you don't have free will. Almost everything you do is coerced or manipulated by the people around you. By the trends around you by the ideas around you even the way you dress everything has to do with what do people look like today?

How do people dress? How do they talk? How do they walk? How do they wear their pants all of it? Is influenced in your life by somebody else? So the question is not do I trade autonomy? Or my my personal freedom for submission to some Declaration of how I should live.

That's not the question. You do do that. The question is to whom are you going to submit? To a culture that is changing every moment. Or to something more stable more eternal now. Also, second timothy 3 16 and 17 all scripture is inspired by god and profitable for teaching.

For reproof for correction for training and righteousness so that the man of god may be adequate equipped equipped for every good deed. Now man of god here isn't necessarily someone who preaches. We are all to be men of god.

And what it is telling us is that everything we need to be what we're supposed to be is found in the scriptures. And if we're memorizing the scripture if we're renewing our mind in the scripture, then the scripture will teach us reprove us and train us and correct us.

But if we're out there just imagine for a moment someone who is out in the world 16 hours a day. Couple hours a day television a couple hours a day or an hour a day with video games. He's surrounded by a worldly atmosphere.

He goes to classes on a secular campus and everything else and then he has a 15 minute quiet time. Yeah, you're going to change the world. No, you're not. You're going to be conformed to the world. You're just going to throw a christian t-shirt on your back you see.

It's going to take a lot guys to break free. The big the big problem nasa has is gravity. It's just a really big problem you ever do any mountain climbing your big problem is gravity. Old age your problem with your body's gravity.

And it takes a whole lot of force to break free from that gravity. The same way it takes a whole lot of force to break free from your culture more than just 15 minutes a day. You have to realize this is wrong.

You also have to realize young man. Listen to me. You are going to one day totally influence the life of a woman. Either for good or for destruction. You are going to influence the life of children either for good or for destruction.

You just need to realize that. Unless you're just going to remain single and hanging out in bars all your life. You are going to have a tremendous impact for good or for evil. Okay now I want us to go into some things.

A Father's Responsibility to Know Scripture

This is about parents and you're saying. Why are you talking to me about parents. Because I want to show you the way it's supposed to be first of all. To be a parent my number one responsibility. As a man as a husband as a father is to know the scriptures.

It says in proverbs 29 18 where there is no vision the people are unrestrained but happy is he who keeps the law. So many pastors will use this, you know where there is no vision the people perish. We have to have a vision.

We have to go in a building program. We have to do that's not what this verse means. We have a hebrew parallelism here. The first phrase is defined by the second and what is the first phrase where there is no vision the people are unrestrained.

But happy is he who keeps the law? What is the vision a vision of the law? In order to be a parent my number one responsibility is to know the law of god. Also in hosea again, my people are destroyed for a lack of knowledge.

I need to know the word of god because i'm going to influence a woman and i'm going to influence children. And I cannot lead them in the course of this world. I cannot do that. I know the hell i've been through.

I know the terrible things i've done prior to coming to christ. I do not want that for them. Now I must also strive to be a biblical example. So as a man, my primary responsibility in my family is to know the word of god.

It is not to give my children everything I didn't have. But it's to give them a father. A father. Even if it means living in a small house and driving old beat-up cars. Where you use roofing screws in order to keep the panels on the side of your car.

Which is what I do. Why? I don't care about new cars. I'm a follower of jesus christ. I don't care about buying my clothes at walmart. I am a follower of jesus christ. I don't care about money. I care about a wife.

A woman. I care about my children. I care about my brothers and sisters in christ. It's the things I did not have that made me the man. I am it's not the things that you. That you get that make you a man.

Most of the things that you get are the very things that destroy you. So after being a man of the word, I must be an example. Paul says in first corinthians 4 15 and 17 Through 17 for if you have countless tutors in christ yet.

You would not have many fathers for in christ. Jesus. I became your father through the gospel. Therefore. I exhort you be imitators of me. You see that in first corinthians 11 1 he said be imitators of me just as also I am of christ.

First thessalonians 2 14 for you brethren became imitators of the church of god in christ. Jesus that are in judea. That's the positive side of this my primary responsibility is to be a man of integrity so that those around me.