That's how he found me, he saw me sitting in the car, he can find me, and I had 100 ,000 life insurance plan, savings account, checking account, string of credit cards, I was in debt, seven suits minimum, five pair of shoes, about 25 ties, 30 shirts, learned to eat hot dogs, hamburgers, chocolate shake, every junk food you can find, and by then, of course, being a theological student, I must have a library of 2 ,000 books, Greek, Hebrew, and all those things, it was okay, I was not doing anything bad, so I got used to it, oh, believe it or not, I even, ladies, brought a book called Color Me Beautiful, winter, summer, autumn, spring, I am winter, that tells you how far this skinny, lost Indian, how far he has come, a long way, the end of 1976, it was like somebody pulled the bottom out, I went to the darkest night of my soul, I felt like a terrible hypocrite, standing like this and preaching to Americans, Sunday after Sunday, and I said to myself, you know what, I know now what happened to me, I was deceived by demons, I left my country, and here I am in America, look at my life, my heart is completely empty, I never felt like that before, I told my church what has happened to me, I didn't tell all the details, I said, look, I'm in real dilemma, I couldn't eat breakfast, lunch, couldn't sleep, I was in turmoil, if you ever believed in this losing salvation, it was then I could think so, my wife said to me, well, I said, look, I think the best thing to do is go into real estate, the other day my wife and I talked about it, I began to get books and trying to figure out how to make money again, you know, she said to me, look, God never calls anyone and forsake them, it only takes for you to wait and ask him, he will speak to you, I said, yes, with my, the same bible, news core for reference, I went to my study, closed the door and said, God, if you ever saw a man who is desperate, want to hear you, totally willing to do anything you ask him to do, it is me, I'm lost, would you please talk to me, God is gracious, his grace is great and he came into the room, just as he did when I was 16 years old, all alone in that room in Bangalore and began to speak to my heart and anchored my soul and reassured me of his love and told me what I must do, I came out of that room as a crazy man and all of a sudden I realized two years went by, my life in America, my eyes were dry, every Friday night I had all night prayer meeting for seven years in India, not one night did I pray in America, all the map was completely, there was nothing about a map in my home anymore, I had the TV, the Newsweek magazine and Dallas Morning Newspaper which is about 5 ,000 pages every morning, I lived for these things, but you know I came out for next few days and weeks, people thought I was kind of sick or something because I had to continue wipe my eyes so I can talk to people, I carried this Bible in the shower, driving car with one hand, I was dying like a man without food, not trying to preach next sermon to my people, but I said, Lord please talk to me, I want to obey you, this became my life, I remember that following weeks, my devotional time reading from the Gospels, I began to read the four Gospels to see what Jesus was saying, it was also so fresh once again, the Lord spoke to me, if any man want to come after me, let him deny himself, then let him pick up his cross and bail him, then let him come after me, all these words became so real to me, if you don't love me more than your father, your mother, your son, your daughter, your wife, even more than your own life, you cannot be my disciple, that same week my wife was working at Baylor Hospital as a nurse, somebody gave me a book, I don't know if it was there, I don't know who wrote it, nothing like that, and I was reading it, the man who wrote that prayed a prayer, he said, oh God, would you please take eternity and stamp into both of my eyes, never read a prayer like that, and I went into my bedroom, closed the door, knelt down beside my bed, I said, God, I don't know what all this means, but please do this for me, the following weeks I found my hair was growing long and I walked around asking God for permission to get a haircut, see if I can find me three dollars here, it cost three dollars during those old days to get a haircut, I would look at my three dollars and say, these three dollars represent three thousand tracts that can be printed in some language for my brothers to distribute, for people to hear at least one time about the name of my Lord, and the TV four legs walked out the house, newspaper stopped, magazine stopped, and I said to my wife Gisela, I just want to keep two suits, five shirts, two ties, two pair of shoes, and I said, sell it, salvation army, whatever, I just want to keep this much only, and I said, why are you buying cookies, cakes and ice cream and all these things, the cleanest water people have in Bangladesh or India, if you brush teeth within America, you will get diarrhea, how clean is our water here, I said, we can drink clean water, use all our money to support missionaries, well, life insurance cancelled, sales account went, and everything we found so much change, hey, before you go on interpreting things, I'm not promoting legalism, work, or anything like that, you can do all what I did, and more than what I did, it will not make you any spiritual, that is not what I'm saying to you, I'm just telling you the story of this Indian, everything in my family, as a little family of husband, wife, and two children, we began to look at the world, once again, as lost without Christ, and our responsibility to reach the lost world, Tuesday night, we start a prayer meeting, still goes on, faithfully praying for the world, and world map came back into my home, why am I saying it to you, do you care about those that are dying without Christ, that never heard the name Christ, in a few weeks time, Christmas will be here, can't believe, I like Christmas, you know why, because I get presents, but while we have the Christmas here, all the things that goes on, the buying, and the selling, and the presents, and the joy, and everything, you must remember, still today, half of the world is waiting to hear about the first Christmas, I was in Oklahoma City, not too long ago, visiting a church, one of the pastors came to me privately, and said, brother KP, I'm disgusted, I am tired, he happened to read the book, I said, how come, he said, you see the church building, I said, yeah, he said, we are paying $52 ,000 a week to the bank, mortgage, or whatever you call it, this week, I was reading, couple of years ago, I remember, super churches, they call it, a church in Houston, the pastor boasted, boasting, I'm repeating some words, so you will not miss it, after millions of dollars been spent on gymnasium, you know, for aerobics, and jumping up and down, like monkeys and frogs, whatever they do, he was saying, we have better things to offer, than the world can offer, so our people will come to our church, am I against church buildings, and gymnasiums, no, but I'm saying to you, if you belong to Christ, to this church, to the body of Christ in this country, when 2 .7 billion people are waiting to hear about Christ, and going to hell, you have no right, I have no right to live our life the way we live, and handle God's money, and go on thinking nothing is wrong, everything is wrong, revolution must start in our individual life, after two years in North India, having lost some weight, tired, weak, old clothes, I walked back into my village, to see my mother, traveling five days, in a third class compartment, in the train, as I walked into my village, I saw my old mother, slightly bent, short, she came, and she embraced me, weeping, and this is what she said, my son, for three and half years, I prayed, that one of my son will become a missionary, a preacher, brothers and sisters, recently I spoke to a group of young people in the Evangelical Fundamental Church, 350 young people, when I talked to them, I found out, there was not one soul in that whole group, that had any thought about world missions, where are our children, what are you praying for your children, what they must become, over 20 ,000 Mormon people, 18, 90, 20, march in the face of the earth, conquering people for their cult's sake, every 24 hours, a 747 jet, from Russia, Moscow, lands in Delhi, or Bombay, loaded with communist literature, magazines, books, selling all over India, on the streets, in 1985, it was the Indian Express newspaper, more American money came to India, for Hinduism, than for missionary work, number 7, was for Christian missionary work, I'm asking you, are we not playing games, do we really believe, what we say, we believe, how can we take it so calmly, I was listening to a tape by Keith Green this morning, the church that is sleeping in the light, and he said, all I hear anymore, is bless me God, bless me God, no one ache, no one hurt, when God began to break my heart, I will not break that, I went to my study, and saw the 2 ,000 some books, and half a dozen leather bound expensive Bibles, and I said to myself, I can't believe I did this, when hundreds of my brothers do not have even a Bible, with any notes in it, here I have all these Bibles, all the study books that I will never read, he reminded me, one day I asked George Woolworth, George, why don't you have a leather bound Bible, it was several years ago, he replied to me, KP, how can I spend money on a leather bound Bible, than half of the world today do not have a Bible to their name, nor our brothers on the mission field, don't have one book to their name, I packed all our books by the way, and sent it by ship to anybody I can find, that can use it or read it, even spiritual things, you can become selfish, the video tapes, the seminars, the trips we make, the cruise on the ship, all this is junk, why am I saying it to you, there must come a time in our life, we will say, dear God, I want someone else to be holier than me, I will give up, my brothers and sisters, I grew up in a home with 5 brothers, my oldest brother was a communist before he became a believer, now 52 years old, I remember as young boys he used to tell us, when he became a communist, he took his own blood from his hand and signed his name over to communism, I never could forget that statement, I just want to ask a question, how old are you?