TLP 286: The Experience of a Righteous Parent, Part 2

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What does it feel like to experience God’s blessing in our parenting? Join AMBrewster as he guides Christian parents through the inexpressible glory of what it’s like to be a Righteous Parent. Check out 5 Ways to Support TLP. Listen to the following episodes on Apple Podcasts by clicking the titles.“Easter” series (starts in episode 249)"Peaceful Parenting” series (starts in episode 69)“Fearless Parenting" (episode 40)“What Is Successful Parenting?” (episode 87) Click here for our free Parenting Course! Click here for Today’s Episode Notes and Transcript.  Like us on Facebook.Follow us on Twitter.Follow AMBrewster on Twitter.Follow us on Pinterest.Subscribe on YouTube. Need some help? Write to us at [email protected].

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TLP 289: Parenting Angry Children, Part 3 | more ways our kids get mad

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It's too easy to claim to be a righteous parent as long as there's no objective way to illustrate that it's true.
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But here God says that a truly righteous parent is going to be blessed in one specific way. If that blessing is missing, then righteousness is missing.
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Welcome to Truth. Love. Parents. Where we use God's Word to become intentional, premeditated parents.
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Here's your host, A .M. Brewster. Welcome back. Today we're going to discuss the experience of righteous parents according to God Himself from Psalm 112.
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But before we do that, I want to thank Kara for making today's episode possible. Without our patrons, who give at least one dollar a month, we would not be able to produce this free parenting content.
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We are a listener -supported ministry, so the Lord has seen fit to bless TLP as we bless His people by sending people like Kara.
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You too can get involved. Just click on the five ways to support TLP link in the description of this episode to learn more. And even if you can't invest financially, you can pray for us.
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You can share us with your friends. You could rate and review and recommend us on iTunes and Facebook. There's just so much you can do to help.
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All of that connects us with searching families who want to know what God's Word says about their homes. So let's talk about that right now.
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Last time we began our discussion looking at what it takes to be a righteous parent. And we saw that a righteous parent trusts
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God, fears the Lord, rejoices in God, delights in God's commandments, obeys God's commands, is gracious and merciful, is generous, and is just.
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And we saw that we cannot hope to enjoy the blessings about which we're going to talk today if we aren't living righteously as God defines it.
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This is the parent's greatest calling. Our biggest job is not leading our kids. Our most important responsibility is following Christ.
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Then to the degree that we do our first job well, we will be able to do our second most important jobs well, ministering to our spouses and children and everyone else in our lives.
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The only other thing I wanted to say by way of review is that we must interpret these blessings in light of the New Testament.
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If that doesn't quite make sense yet, I will explain what I mean when we discuss the blessings themselves. And I think now's the time to do that.
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All right, number two, the experience of the righteous parent. A. A righteous parent will be blessed.
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Verse 1 records, Praise the Lord, blessed is the man who fears the Lord, who greatly delights in His commandments.
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I believe with all my heart that God desires to bless His followers. And not only does He want to do this,
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He will, beyond a shadow of a doubt, bless His followers. It's not just a question of what He wants to do, it's a question of what
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He will do. But what is the extent of His blessing? What does His blessing look like?
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We'll try to answer that question after we consider the second point. B. A righteous parent's children will also be blessed.
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Verse 2 tells us, His offspring will be mighty in the land. The generation of the upright will be blessed.
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Okay, so we need to take a moment to consider this general idea of blessing. We could take weeks and weeks discussing this one, but I want to zero in on Matthew 5 just to make three important observations.
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Each of the Beatitudes in Matthew 5 starts with the promise that the individual they describe will be blessed, and then, so as to prove the point, one specific blessing is included with each beatitude.
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Consider these blessings with me. Inheriting the kingdom of heaven, receiving comfort, inheriting the earth, satisfaction in righteousness, mercy, seeing
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God, being called the sons of God, inheriting the kingdom of heaven—this is mentioned a second time—and heavenly reward.
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With the exception of inheriting the earth, it's clear that all of those promised blessings are significantly spiritual or a future heavenly reward.
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But inheriting the earth isn't a temporal blessing, either. It's just another future promise when God recreates the world and populates it with His people.
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It doesn't matter where you look in the New Testament, you're going to see the exact same thing. These three consistent truths concerning God's blessing crop up again and again and again.
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Number one, Christians will be blessed spiritually and materially in heaven.
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Five of the nine blessings in Matthew 5 are things for which we can look forward in the future. Of those five, it's hard to say which are more materially focused and which are primarily a spiritual blessing and which are a little bit of both.
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I kind of lean toward that most of them at least being both. Anyway, as awesome as that is,
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I think too many people put an overemphasis on the material and physical blessings of heaven. It was during part two of our last
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Easter series that I remarked, too often, when considering our heavenly home, we focus on being free from sickness or fatigue or disease or hunger or weakness, but this promise is infinitely more than that.
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Born -again believers will have no sin. The glory of the resurrection focus is to systematically draw our understanding to the fact that the gospel absolutely will and must change us, not merely physically, but spiritually.
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Forget the streets of gold and walls made out of precious stones and gates constructed of one giant pearl.
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Forget the perfect health and uncursed earth. All of that will be infinitely overshadowed by the spiritual blessings of being free from sin and forever communing in the presence of God, able to perfectly please
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Him, and for the first time ever, finally being able to fulfill our purpose by worshiping
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Him and Him alone. I think our preoccupation with the material prosperity of the afterlife illustrates why we're so focused on material prosperity in this life, but that's not really what we see in Scripture.
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Of the remaining four earthly blessings related in Matthew 5, all four of them are directly spiritual in nature.
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So, our second point would be this, if they submit to God, Christians will always be blessed spiritually while on earth.
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Every single promise of peace, contentment, wisdom, teaching, illumination, refuge, strength, comfort, rest, and the plethora of other divine blessings are conditional.
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If we're not rejoicing in the Lord and casting our cares on Him and thinking correctly, we won't experience peace.
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If we don't run away from our own understanding and follow after God's commands, we can't have wisdom.
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If we don't live righteously, we won't be blessed. And the list of examples goes on and on. I would even go so far as to say that salvation is conditioned upon our faith.
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Now, that's not a work, okay, because faith is a gift from God. It's not something we necessarily quote -unquote do, but it is something that must happen.
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People who do not have faith in God will not be saved. And we can know for sure that God will definitely and consistently keep every single one of His promises to bless us spiritually by helping us to be conformed to the image of His Son.
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In fact, I'm going to argue that the spiritual blessings offered to the church are magnificently more glorious than the temporal physical blessings offered to Israel in the
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Old Testament. Okay, so I live a life of relative ease and plenty for my 80 or so years on earth.
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That's nice. But the Jews had to regularly make atonement for their sins as they awaited the coming of the
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Messiah. They didn't have the completed Word of God. They didn't even have the Holy Spirit filling them the way
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New Testament believers do. I think a Chinese pastor being tortured in some government prison, or someone having her life cut brutally short at the hands of Muslims who were able to experience spiritual joy and hope and peace and contentment and wisdom are in a far more glorious position than any
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Old Testament Jew. Now, quick note. I keep saying Old Testament Jew because I believe that Jewish Christians who are part of the church will receive all the same temporal spiritual blessings as any other
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Christian, but they will also receive unique blessings once in heaven as well. I just didn't want anyone to think that modern
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Jews who believe in Christ don't receive the same blessings as the rest of the church. Anyway, again, our preoccupation with material blessing too often causes us to miss the actual riches of the depth and breadth of the spiritual gifts
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God wants to give us. So, okay, Aaron, I got you, but what about material blessing on earth for Christians?
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Well, in a way, they don't really exist. Number three,
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Christians may experience differing levels of material prosperity on earth, but it has nothing to do with blessing.
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Now, after hearing this third point, my wife made one little addition. She said, Christians may experience differing levels of material prosperity on earth, but it has nothing and everything to do with blessing.
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Anything and everything short of eternity in hell is a gigantic blessing from God.
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I tell my boys at Victory Academy that if I was lucky enough to be able to spend the rest of my life being beaten in the face by somebody wielding a folding chair, it would be so much better than I deserve, because as uncomfortable as that would be, it's way, way better than hell.
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So yes, one can say that getting over a sickness or winning the lottery or getting a promotion or selling a home or graduating at the top of the class is a blessing, but so is being sick and destitute and being fired and losing your home and not having the highest grade in school.
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If you want to see just how much the modern Christian is misunderstanding this glorious truth, just scroll through Facebook and look at the words that follow, quote,
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Praise God! I know, I'm guilty of it too. I catch myself all the time wanting to praise the
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Lord for selling my house, but you know what? The five years He didn't sell my house was a blessing too.
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But if I'm being honest, it wasn't the blessing I wanted. You see, we generally define blessing as receiving what we want.
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But what if God's best is a child with Down syndrome? What if God's best for us is cancer or singleness or martyrdom?
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I know, that significantly clashes with the Christian -American dream, but we need to submit our minds to God's will, not our own.
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The level of your prosperity has absolutely nothing to do with a special outpouring of God's blessing on you because you obeyed more than someone else.
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Our equal submission to God results in equal blessings of peace and wisdom and other spiritual things.
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And our equal submission to God has absolutely nothing to do with the fact that we get paid different amounts at work.
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It is unbiblical to suggest that the guy who makes more money is more holy, but it is acceptable to say that the person experiencing more
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God -infused contentment is living a more righteous life. Now, I know
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I spent a ton of time on that, but this is the very crux of today's show. God does want to bless the righteous parent.
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And perhaps you are living righteously and growing in your sanctification. If that's the case, you cannot afford to think that God is going to bless you and your kids by making you temporarily successful or healthy.
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God may allow you to experience a different level of material and physical prosperity than others, but it will have nothing to do with your spiritual submission to God.
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That will simply be how He's chosen to glorify Himself in this world and accomplish His will. And yes, of course, you do have the responsibility to be faithful in whatever prosperity
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He gives you, but no more than a missionary in Haiti has. God will bless you for being righteous, and He will bless your kids.
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They may not become rich or smart or popular. It may be that a righteous parent has an unregenerate child who never submits to God.
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That doesn't mean he hasn't blessed them, though. He allowed them to have parents who loved the Lord. He used those parents to point the child to Him.
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That's significant. Not everyone receives such a blessing. But it didn't have anything to do with what the child did.
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It was a result of their parents just simply being righteous. Now, I want to go over this just one more time really quickly because it's so important.
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When it comes to blessings in the Christian life, number one, Christians will be blessed spiritually and materially in heaven.
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Of course, the spiritual blessing will far outweigh any of the material blessings. Number two, if they submit to God, Christians will always be blessed spiritually while on earth.
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You can bank on it every single time. But number three, Christians may experience differing levels of material prosperity on earth, but it really has nothing to do with blessing.
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Now, the remaining six experiences of a righteous parent must be understood within this context.
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So even though we've already used up a lot of our time, I believe these next blessings will flow quickly. See, a righteous parent will not be afraid.
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Verses seven through eight explain, he is not afraid of bad news. His heart is firm, trusting in the
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Lord. His heart is steady. He will not be afraid until he looks in triumph on his adversaries.
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This obviously does not mean that bad news won't come. In fact, it insinuates that it will. However, the spiritual blessing of peace and steadfastness will be yours if you live righteously before God.
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Are you afraid? Are you experiencing anxiety or worry over your kids or your spouse or your monetary situation or your health and anything else?
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If that's the case, I'm not saying you're a terrible person. I struggle with anxiety too, but just like I, you need to grapple with the fact that you're not experiencing the blessing
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God promises to righteous parents. And again, though that doesn't mean you're an absolute reprobate parent, you do need to acknowledge that you're not trusting
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God as you should. Do you remember our last discussion? Trusting God was the very foundation of being a righteous parent.
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Here again, what God says, he's not afraid of bad news. His heart is firm, trusting in the
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Lord. Let me be frank. This episode is not designed to inform righteous parents about what they can expect to receive from God.
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No, no, no, no. Righteous parents are already receiving these blessings and experiencing these joys.
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They already know them to be true. This episode was designed to help all of us, that includes me, to compare our experience in order to detect whether or not we're really being righteous as we should.
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It's too easy to tell people I was in a rock band if I don't have the recordings and albums and pictures to back it up.
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In the same way, it's too easy to claim to be a righteous parent as long as there is no objective way to illustrate that.
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But here God says that a truly righteous parent is not going to be afraid, and he's not going to be afraid because he genuinely is trusting in God.
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An afraid parent has some more maturing he or she needs to do. That's why we have a peaceful parenting series in the episode
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Fearless Parenting, so we can all grow in our dependence on God and reap the fearless benefits of truly trusting
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Him. Now please know that I don't say this to put anybody down. Yes, a fearful parent is not trusting
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God. That's Bible. Therefore, though they may be more righteous than other parents in other ways, they still have things on which they need to work.
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And that's okay. None of us are perfect, and God expects us to all be growing and maturing every day we live.
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So, I say this because I love you. I say this because I need it. D. A righteous parent will be richly supplied.
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Verse 3 says, Wealth and riches are in his house, and his righteousness endures forever. Yes, the
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Old Testament Jews who submitted to God had the promise of earthly riches, but we New Testament saints have a much greater promise.
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Consider Jesus' consolation to the church of Smyrna in Revelation 2. Quote, I know your tribulation and your poverty, but you are rich, and the slander of those who say that they are
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Jews and are not, but are a synagogue of Satan. Do not fear what you are about to suffer. Behold, the devil is about to throw some of you into prison, that you may be tested, and for ten days you will have tribulation.
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Be faithful unto death. And I will give you the crown of life. He who has an ear, let him hear what the
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Spirit says to the churches. The one who conquers will not be hurt by the second death.
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Unquote. In the midst of tribulation and poverty, Jesus calls them rich because they believed in Him and He was going to give them everything they needed to glorify
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Him, even if that meant they were simply going to be faithful unto death. In 1
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Timothy 6, 17 -19 we read, As for the rich in this present age, charge them not to be haughty, or to set their hopes on the uncertainty of riches, but on God, who richly provides us with everything to enjoy.
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They are to do good, to be rich in good works, to be generous and ready to share, thus storing up treasure for themselves as a good foundation for the future, so that they may take hold of that which is truly life.
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The righteous parent will be rich. They will be rich in the provision of God. The Bible has everything that we need for life and godliness, and because of that we can be rich in our righteousness.
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The Lord provides us a way to escape every single temptation we will face, and He arms us with every spiritual weapon we need to overcome
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Satan. Amen and amen. Are you having fun yet? I am. This is so great.
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This is such a blessing. Letter E. A righteous parent will have direction.
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Verse 4 reveals, Light dawns in the darkness for the upright. He is gracious, merciful, and righteous.
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We all know that God is light, and in Him is no darkness. We know that His word is a light to our feet.
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As the light of truth fills the Christian, we become a light to this dark world. The believer need not fret over any decision.
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Yes, they will be hard, and the Bible doesn't specifically say whether or not you need to buy a black car or the red car or whether or not you need to send your kids to a public school,
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Christian school, or homeschool, but He does give you everything you need to make the decision and know you're glorifying
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Him in the process. We have a ton of episodes about the education questions, but we also have a series called
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Help Your Children Discover God's Will for Their Lives and an episode called Decision Making and the Will of God that should be a huge help on this point.
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But it gets even better. And if you're sad because you don't have all of these blessings written down yet and you're afraid you're going to forget them, fear not.
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We have free episode notes linked below. They're all right there for you. Are you ready for it to get better?
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Letter F, a righteous parent will never fall, verse 6 promises, for the righteous will never be moved.
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He will be remembered forever. In the same way that God gives us the weapons we need to fight the spiritual battle, we can have the confidence that if we use the weapons, aka live righteously, we will never fall in our sin.
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Only when we stop trusting God and fearing God and delighting in and obeying His commandments will we fall in our sin.
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Who is there to tear us from God's grip? Our spiritual failures will be our own and they will come when we're not being righteous.
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G, a righteous parent will triumph. Not only will we not fall, we will overcome.
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Verse 8 says, his heart is steady. He will not be afraid until he looks in triumph on his adversaries.
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And verse 10 records, the wicked man sees it and is angry. He gnashes his teeth and melts away.
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The desire of the wicked will perish. They may malign us and take away our rights.
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They may persecute us and even take our lives, but they will never triumph. And as we're being burned alive at the stake for the name of Christ, they will be incapable of stealing our joy and praise and adoration and testimony to God.
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And though they may feel smug delight at silencing yet one more Christian, it is they who will, but by the grace of God, live out their days in rebellion to God and enter a
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Christless eternity while we, by their own hand, will spend eternity with our
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Savior in glorious perfection and light. I know parenting is hard.
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I know we too often look for triumphs in potty training and sleeping through the night and passing algebra to give us comfort, but we have so much more promised to us if we will only live righteously.
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If you feel like you don't have direction and you're constantly falling in your sin and you're not experiencing triumph over your own flesh, then you need to listen to yesterday's episode again.
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We all must be reminded about true righteousness and how the Lord intends for us to grow in it. And finally, a righteous parent will leave a legacy.
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Verse 6 reads, For the righteous will never be moved. He will be remembered forever.
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And verse 9 says, He has distributed freely. He has given to the poor. His righteousness endures forever.
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His horn is exalted in honor. For what will your parenting be remembered?
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So many years from now, when you're dead and gone, if someone were to track down your children and ask, how would you describe your dad and mom's parenting, what would they say?
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Will you be remembered as a righteous parent who experienced the blessings of a life submitted to God? Or will you be remembered as a parent who thought education was really important?
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Or who pushed their kids to excel in sports? Or who put family above everything else? Or worked really hard so we could have a comfortable life?
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Now those things aren't so bad, but is that the legacy God wants us to leave? This righteous parent is remembered because his faith in Christ caused him to not be moved.
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His horn is exalted in honor because he was generous and showed the light of Christ to all with whom he interacted.
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But Aaron, I want to be remembered for having good kids. That would be nice, but that's not always the experience of a righteous parent.
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Do you remember our What is Successful Parenting episode? You really need to hear that if you never have, and maybe it would be helpful to re -listen to it if you have.
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Our parenting will not be judged by our children's submission to Christ. Our parenting will be judged by our submission to Christ as we parented.
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Remember, our biggest job is not leading our kids. Our most important responsibility is following Christ.
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Thank you for your patience today. Please join us next time as we start a series about parenting angry children.
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Now, if you've made it this far, I'd love to just read Psalm 112, 1 through 10 for you as we finish up today so we can all experience the joy of this passage as the
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Lord originally laid it out. He runs in the darkness for the upright.
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He is gracious, merciful, and righteous. It is well with the man who deals generously and lends, who conducts his affairs with justice.
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For the righteous will never be moved. He will be remembered forever. He's not afraid of bad news.
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His heart is firm, trusting in the Lord. His heart is steady. He will not be afraid until he looks in triumph on his adversaries.
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He has distributed freely. He's given to the poor. His righteousness endures forever.
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His horn is exalted in honor. The wicked man sees it and is angry. He gnashes his teeth and melts away.
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The desire of the wicked will perish. So, my friends, to that glorious end,
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I'll see you next time. Truth. Love. Parents. Is part of the
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Evermind Ministries family and is dedicated to helping you become an intentional premeditated parent.
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Join us next time as we search God's Word for the truth your family needs today.