TLP 18: Refocusing Your Family After the Holidays

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You'll likely be shocked and saddened to find out that suicide rates are at their highest right after vacations and major holidays.

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People spend their whole year preparing for this event and it comes and goes and they're left thinking, is that it? Is that all there is?

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Welcome to Truth. Love. Parents. Where we use God's word to become intentional premeditated parents.

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Here's your host, AM Brewster. Welcome to TLP. I'm Aaron and today we're discussing how to refocus your family after the holidays.

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Some of your kids have probably gone back to school and no doubt there are others of you still on vacation, but all of us are going to have to experience the same struggle, trying to motivate our homes back into real life.

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Seriously, we just spent how many weeks eating and watching and playing and sleeping and visiting and none of our lives actually worked that way.

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You might be shocked and saddened to find out that suicide rates are at their highest right after vacations and major holidays.

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People spend their whole year preparing for this event and it comes and goes and they're left thinking, is that it? Is that all there is?

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And though those of us who know God shouldn't struggle with those thoughts, we're still human and getting back into the swing of things has never been our favorite pastime.

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So in order to do just that, I want to give you four ideas to get the new year started on the right foot. Number one, this is what you need to do.

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Start real life now. For those of you who, like I, are still on vacation, don't skip real life.

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You and your family shouldn't take a break from devotions. Whether you're at home or in a motel, chores and personal hygiene are vital to staying healthy and comfortable.

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And though it may be acceptable to have a movie marathon over break, that shouldn't be all you do. Get a start on those personal enrichment resolutions you made for yourself or lead your family in a community service opportunity.

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I have friends who even have their kids over break a couple times, do some homework -esque types of things, but not the normal things you do in school, but something new, like learning a new language or something.

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Starting real life now also goes for what you eat. Yes, by all means, enjoy your food, but whether you're eating or drinking, you need to glorify

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God. There shouldn't be a drastic difference between your vacation and your post -vacation food intake.

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Even if you're eating out, you should be taking care of the temple of God. So first of all, start real life now.

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Second of all, talk about real life now. Most of us with young children know how valuable it is to give your children countdowns.

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We'll be leaving the park in about five minutes, kids. We're going to be leaving in just four minutes. All right, you have three more minutes, get a few more slides in and so on.

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This is very valuable during vacation too. Now, don't announce pointless things every minute, but at least once a day, you should focus on the upcoming week and don't discuss it like a threat saying to your teenager, hey, don't forget about school next week isn't going to lighten her spirits.

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But you could easily have that moment where you're having a serious conversation with your daughter and you could say, you know what, yeah,

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I'm kind of sorry I didn't get myself more involved in your school work last semester.

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I'm really looking forward to helping you more this year in your homework. I think we can bring your English grade up from what it was in first semester.

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See, just like we talked about in episode 16, your ability to successfully implement your New Year's resolutions hangs in part on keeping it clearly communicated.

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Start that process now so it doesn't seem like we're bettering ourselves. It's just something you do in the doldrums of quote unquote normal life.

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In order to refocus your family, you need to make sure you're living elements of real life now. You also need to be discussing post -vacation ideas to help prepare everyone mentally for the end of break.

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So that last day doesn't come and we're all like, what, we're leaving today? Number three is for when the holidays are officially over.

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For some of you, you're already there and you wish you'd known to do the first two things, but you can't go back in time because your brother -in -law bought you a sweater instead of a time machine.

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But that's OK. Where I work at Victory Academy for Boys, our students finish off their vacations by leaving home and going back to a boy's home in the north woods of Wisconsin.

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They won't see their families again for months and they have to put up with me for the rest of the semester. I don't have a chance to do steps one and two with them.

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All I have is when they walk in the door. So number three, continue the fun now.

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Sure, breaks over and school's back in session. I know you have to work, but that doesn't mean your family should stop hanging out, having special meals or enjoying each other.

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Few people really do cold turkey very well, and this is no exception. I suggest tapering off the family fun as slowly as possible.

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To be honest, some of our families need to ramp it up anyway. I suggest you listen to episode eight because many people just need to learn to make their family time work better.

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And if your family time over vacation was, let's say, 100 and your daily life should definitely be no lower than 40, then taper off the festivities over the course of the first week back and try to find a new average, preferably one that involves spending more time together than you did last year.

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And lastly, number four, you need to transition with a good attitude now. We are the leaders.

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We're the models. We're the pace setters. Don't end break off complaining about work on Monday. Don't have a bad attitude.

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Praise God in front of your children about the blessings of a secure job and a good education. Be proactive.

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Be excited about real life. Should our families be allowed to loathe God's will for their lives? Of course not, but we do it so often when we get depressed because we've reached the dreaded last day of vacation.

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Set the standard for your house. Be the example. Of course, this is going to take a premeditated plan.

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You're going to need to figure out what chores and service opportunities need to be done. Plan for some more aggressive family time once break ends and prepare yourself spiritually to be the example you need to be as you enter the most exciting part of the year tomorrow.

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So as a quick recap, start real life now, talk about real life now, continue the fun now and transition with a good attitude now.

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And for those of you who are interested, we've started publishing notes, just really simple notes about each of the episodes that we have.

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We're going to be posting them on evermindministries .com. You can have access to them there. And I hope you'll check it out, especially if you think it'll help you remember these points as you try to implement them in your home.

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Now if you'd like some help refocusing your family this year, please don't hesitate to contact us at counselor at evermindministries .com.

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You can also check us out at evermindministries .com for help in becoming more like Christ this year. And you're always invited to engage with us over social media.

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Just search Evermind Ministries on Facebook, Pinterest, Instagram, and Twitter. You can also follow me at AM Brewster.

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And don't forget about our new Truth, Love, Parent Facebook page. You can like us, follow us, and share us there.

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And whatever you do, have a happy new year. Truth, Love, Parent is part of the

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Evermind Ministries family and is dedicated to helping you become an intentional premeditated parent.

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Join us next time as we search God's Word for the truth your family needs today.