Next Week | Stupid & Unnecessary Laws

Thank you guys. Thank you everybody for joining us. Welcome back to next week. Are you guys ready? Yes? It's time for the blend of the week. This week's blend of the week is Kim Java Un. It thinks it's the greatest coffee in the world and actually it's really dark with a lot of daddy issues.

This one is here. All right, everybody. Are you guys ready? Let's do this everybody. Welcome to the desk piece. Gotta love that Un. Okay. Today's theme is called US federal laws. Actually, sorry. I didn't say that right.

Let me say it again. Today's theme is called dumb and unnecessary laws. When it comes to laws in this country, we tend to look at the president. But our president is Trump and he tends to look at himself.

One thing we can all agree on about Donald Trump is that he loves himself. I'm very highly educated. I know words.

I have the best words. I have the best people. I have the best courses in the world. Trump steaks are by far the best tasting, most flavorful beef you've ever had.

It's the best of the best. Where has all the time gone? We're almost a full year into Donald Trump showing us what King Nebuchadnezzar would be like today.

You read the book of Daniel.

Read it and try not to imagine Trump every time Nebuchadnezzar comes into the story. I'm a magnificent king. I'm gonna build the most beautiful statue you've ever seen in your life. And most of it's going to be gold-plated.

I'm also gonna make a people bow down to it, specifically three people. People, some people can't stand Donald Trump as president. And one thing that's worth noting, however, is that just like us, he doesn't seem to be a fan of too many laws and regulations.

In fact, Trump has already reversed 15 laws that Obama put into place. I guess the phrase, once you go black, you never go back, only applies if you're not president.

And you have seen what's happening with regulations. They're going fast. We need regulations, but many of them are unnecessary.

Look, we need unnecessary regulations to go away. You don't have to listen to the Angry Orange to know that there are too many unnecessary regulations. There's an insane amount of laws in this country.

In fact, there are about 20 ,000 laws just governing the use and ownership of guns. Man, if we only had a Second Amendment, if that only existed, right, we wouldn't need any of those laws, right? That's too bad.

I mean, there are so many federal laws that on average we unintentionally break about three of them every single day. It's just like the old saying, three dumb laws a day help free medical keep the doctors with decent health care away.

It does. There are so many laws, we don't even know half of them. And yet today, secular America says that they don't want to serve God because he just has too many rules. However, the Old Testament, it is estimated, only has a little over 600 laws, and a good chunk of them are only about skin conditions.

But in this country, we've fallen so far away from God, and we don't display wisdom or intelligence. I mean, we display a love for control. I mean, that's in our identity, right? For instance, it is illegal.

This is the truth. It's illegal to go whale hunting in Nebraska. Just think about that one, guys. And to help you process that, let's go to a map of the US. Let's go to that map. Okay. Now, Nebraska is close to the ocean, right?

And so that makes sense that there would be whale hunting prohibited. Actually, that's New York City. Here's Nebraska, right there on the coastline. There it is, right? I'm sure there's plenty of whale sightings and whale hunting there.

No, wait, that's Oregon. Surely, Nebraska's got to be near some water, right? No, that's North Korea. But it does have whales, only in North Korea, they hunt us. Now, okay, here's a real picture of where Nebraska is.

This is really Nebraska. And as you can see, it's completely landlocked. And yet, Nebraska has a no whale hunting law. There aren't any whales in Nebraska. I looked it up, and they don't even have whales in a zoo.

Which means the closest they get to seeing whales is in the water, when there's a sad lady in a swim dress. When there are so many laws, and half of them are stupid, it makes sense as to why something like this would happen.

Something like this.

Payne says she was interfering with the investigation, and that his commanding officer told him to make an arrest. Today, the Salt Lake City police chief says he apologized to Wubbles, and that Detective Payne has been placed on paid administrative leave.

Okay, look, you know there's a problem when somebody does know the law, and they still get detained. Alright, now this wouldn't have been okay, even if the video came out looking like this. Yeah, still not okay, alright?

The nurse did her job, and even expressed the law. She told him what the law was, what the rules were. But they, she still got detained. And the only blonde that was supposed to get arrested this year was Hillary Clinton.

Remember that? I do. Now, I think the reason this officer made unlawful decisions is because he's not actually a cop. He is clearly Professor Flitwick from Harry Potter. That's a fact. Amazing. Now, we hate authority when moments like this happen.

But then we use authority if it works to our advantage, like how Joel Osteen did this week.

There were safety issues. This building had flooded before, and so we were just being precautious. But the main thing is the city didn't ask us to become a shelter there.

The city never asked you to? Well, Joel, I don't know what's in your Cliff Notes version of the Bible, but Hebrews 13, 2 did ask you to, when it said, Be sure to welcome into your home strangers. But maybe Joel Osteen was listening to his own advice here.

I'm not saying you have to cut people off, never speak to them again.

I am saying you should put up some boundaries. You see, Houston? He didn't cut you off. He just put up some boundaries. Probably the same ones he has with God. If we're relying on the government to tell us when to care for people, then we're missing the whole point of our independence, say, in 1776.

I mean, we separated because they were abusing the power over us. They were enacting unjust laws. They were messing with our freedom of religion. And after we gained our independence and we declared it, we set up a government allowing each state the right to govern itself sovereignly, with the federal government being sort of the manager, the glue that kind of holds things together.

Boom! Educated.

The federal government was not intended to force other states to do things against their will, which means that this is not a law.

Good evening. In a landmark ruling, the Supreme Court today legalized abortions. The majority in cases from Texas and Georgia said that the decision to end a pregnancy during the first three months belongs to the woman and her doctor, not the government.

So the Supreme Court, who's not allowed to make laws, that's Congress's job, created a law making abortion legal in every state? Now listen, Supreme Court, this is not a wedding and you are not a mother-in-law.

You can't tell us what to do. I mean, if I'm wrong here, then Schoolhouse Rock lied to us, all of us.

You mean even if the whole Congress says you should be a law, the president can still say no? Yes, that's called a veto. If the president vetoes me, I have to go back to Congress and they vote on me again and by that time you're sold.

By that time, it's very unlikely that you become a law.

Notice how the Supreme Court wasn't in that song? I mean, come on, Supreme Court, if this nice bill has to go through this whole process, then abortion definitely has to. I mean, look at him. If anyone's gonna have an exception, it should be him, but he's just a bill and he's just sitting there on Capitol Hill.

Let me get this straight. Congress makes the bills, the president can veto or sign, and the Supreme Court can decide whether or not a law is unconstitutional. So Roe v. Wade was never a law. All they did was express an opinion.

They didn't create a law. Courts can't make laws. Opinions are not the same as laws. Otherwise, I'd have canceled The View years ago. So here's where we're at. We obey laws that aren't laws and we ignore laws.

Why? Because we don't have meaningful standards and we ignore God's standards, which is actually crazy because all the laws in the Bible promote self-government. In Deuteronomy 19 .5, it says that if you go out with your neighbor to cut wood and the axe head flies off and kills your neighbor, you're not guilty of intentional murder.

And the safety and responsibility is on the person using the axe, not with the Occupational Safety and Health Administration. In closing, guys, here's a video of a cat. That was amazing. That was amazing.

And what does this cat video have to do with our country?

Nothing.

Just like Roe vs. Wade. The only difference is cats might give someone allergies, but they don't kill 50 million people. Now, I wanted to show just how ridiculous the law system is here in the United States.

So I decided to point out a couple of ridiculous laws by breaking them here on the show. Right now. In Arkansas, it is illegal to mispronounce Arkansas's. Come and get me, Arkansas's! In New York, it is against the law to wear slippers after 10 p .m.

And so, for those of you guys in New York right now watching us live, it's after 10. Pay close attention. Just me and my bunny slippers. Come and get me, New York! In Alabama, it's illegal to wear a fake mustache that causes laughter in a church.

That's the truth, you know. We may not be in church, but I am a pastor. Now, if you want to come get me, you're gonna have to get through this incredible mustache first. And this, right here, this is my weapon.

That's right, Alabama! I just used confetti, which is also illegal in your state. Come and get me, Alabama! In the state of Connecticut, if you drop a pickle and it doesn't bounce, it's legally not a pickle.

It didn't bounce, and I don't care what you say, Connecticut. That's still a pickle, and I refuse to say otherwise. Now, in fact, I am so mad, I could spit. I could literally spit right now, which is illegal somewhere in Arizona right now, so I will.

In Iowa, it's illegal to tell someone that you're giving them butter if it's really margarine. Actually, this one makes sense. How dare you?

How.

Dare you? And lastly, in Nebraska, there's a law that you can't get married if you have a venereal disease. This is interesting. I think Nebraska just learned how to stop gay marriage. Look it up, guys.

It's the truth. Which, by the way, is not a national law, because guess who decided to legalize gay marriage? The same people who decided on Roe v. Wade, which I am obviously against, and you got a problem with the Supreme Court, feel free to come and get me.

That's all right now for next week. We will catch you on the other side. Stay with us, guys!