Justified - The Testimony of Evangelist Rocky Freeman

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Dr. Irwin Rocky Freeman

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Being born in an Orthodox Jewish home has many advantages and it also presents many problems being born in an
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Orthodox Jewish home means that you know discipline as I related to The young people and I've talked to others about it in a
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Jewish home in an Orthodox Jewish home, which is the strict sect It's those who follow the feast those who follow the law and adhere to the law of Moses Explicitly without any variances whatsoever.
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You learn extreme discipline at a very early age at four years of age You began to study the
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Bible you began to study Hebrew and you began to study Judaistic history You began to study the history of the people of Israel by the time
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I was five years of age I could speak English and I could speak Hebrew and I was well on the way to memorizing the first five books in the
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Bible Much of the Psalms and much of the prophets working my way Towards becoming bar mitzvah the son of the law or the first time a man whenever I approached the age of 12 and between the
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Age of 12 and 13 and also has many disadvantages I know that everybody thinks all the
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Jews got all the money. We don't have all of it. We just got most of it, but Everybody thinks that a
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Jew is a little short slimy greedy character That's a money -making machine and he owns a pawn shop or a dry cleaning store or a shoe store
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And that's the general concept of a Jew, but it's not always that way in many cases it is my dad was in the dry cleaning business and We didn't have a lot of money and I was born in Nashville, Tennessee It was one of the largest religious centers in America.
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Almost every religious group has offices there I lived in the same house for 17 years and not one time
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Not one knock on the door Ever came for anybody from any church of any group or any denomination or anything religious to knock on our door to tell us that there was a
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Savior in the world and that Jesus cared about us and I learned that we didn't have a lot of things and So I determined at a very early age.
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I was gonna have better clothes I was gonna have more money and I was gonna have more material possessions than any person that I knew of in my age bracket
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Any of my personal friends and I set out on this goal being raised in a Jewish home. I've known persecution
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I've never been stoned and and I've never been beaten because I was a Jew, but I've been cursed.
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I've been mocked I was laughed at in school I was made fun of by the kids that I went to school with Whenever I was a of the junior age like these the kids made fun of me
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They used to run along the side of me and sing little songs to me making fun of me I don't know what the song meant, but I cured that I got me a cue stick and I cut it off and I took the heavy end of it and I carried that down in my trousers and I'd run and run as fast as I could run and if they could stay up with me then
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I stopped it I reached out and tapped him lightly and that slowed him down a little bit And so the word got around and they quit running along beside me singing little songs
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Whenever I was five years of age, I could read and write I could read third grade readers and I could write about as good as I can now
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That's not much help, but I could I mean not print I could actually write so consequently when I went to public school
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They skipped me from the first grade to the third grade. They don't do that much anymore, but they did then and Because I could already read and write and I could already do what the kids could do in the first and second grade
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So this put me in an age bracket of kids three and four years older than myself And so naturally
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I tried to stay up with them Now I went to a public school five days a week and on Saturday morning on the
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Sabbath I got up real early and I had to go to Hebrew school and I stayed there all day studying
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Hebrew and Studying the Bible and studying in the history of the people of Israel and one thing in a
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Jewish home See, I couldn't run home Like some of you kids do if the teacher gets you at school You're all gonna tell your mom and dad and your mom and daddy goes down there wants to fire the teacher run him out of The school
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I'll get a fire but not so in a Jewish home I made a mistake of going home one day and I said daddy that rabbi whipped me
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And I think you ought to go down and talk to him My daddy took me upstairs and he whipped me and so I learned then and there that when the rabbi said something brother
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I didn't go back and tell anybody about it. I was raised in this sort of an atmosphere So I moved in to junior high school and and I began to do things like a lot of the kids did and I wanted
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To be accepted by my friends I mean, I didn't want to be made fun of and I didn't want to be laughed at and I didn't want to be ridiculed and Friends I ran around with they drank a lot, you know
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I mean even in high school, and so whenever I was 12 and 13 years old, I decided that I would take some alcohol
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You know, I'd be like my friend I'd drink some beer and we found a lady who'd sell this to us And so we went in I found if you take a quart you could drink a quart real quick So he just turned up and guzzling and you would have to drink more than one quart and we just turn up just drink it
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As long as we could and and I could get high on that say and so I'd be alright by the time I was 15 years of age
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I could take a half a pint of moonshine in one hand and a seven up in the other hand and I could take
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Moonshine and drink it and one swallow and with another swallow drink that seven up and I could walk a straight line
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And I wouldn't get sick in just the two years that I began drinking It had become a part of my life a daily ritual with me.
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I was not alcoholic I don't believe but it became a thing that we just did it now all schoolteachers.
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I believe hate Jews I'll tell you what. I had the hardest time with my schoolteachers. I mean no matter what listen we said alphabetically
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My last name is not Freeman, I mean that's my name now, but my family name is Friedman F R I E D M A N My dad drove a car for Al Capone back in the early days and he had a big shootout up there and they get scared
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And he went to California and changed his name to Freeman and stayed out there a couple years and he came back in the Nashville Area and there he met my mother and she kind of straightened him out and he dealt cards professionally for a while But I was in school, you know
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And I was running around with these kids and I want to do a lot of things and and the teachers just didn't understand me My last name started with an
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F But I always got the last seat in the last row and I never did understand that until I got a little older You know because we had pairs in our school for instance, and you could buy them a penny apiece
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Well, everybody say the core and they'd give them to me and I'd carry a sack of apple cores like my lunch and I'd carry
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Them in the classroom and the teacher would be writing on the blackboard, you know And all of a sudden splat right off the blackboard.
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They had been she wouldn't even look She just turned right around say go to your homeroom and pointed me and I don't know how in the world she knew
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And so I always said she hates Jews That's reason she picks me out And so I taught myself that and I learned that you could get out of a lot of things by saying that you're in a minority
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Group, I learned that early. Well, listen boy anything happen me. I said, you don't like me cause I'm a Jew I'm gonna tell my mama that you called me a
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Jew. Don't listen. Don't you go? I didn't call you that now and boy they come off of it real quick and I say yeah
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You're talking about me because of my religion. That's what you're doing And boy the teachers they just scare me as I was gonna tell my rabbi tell about they're making fun of me
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There are many things that I could tell you about my young my teenage life But I began to wander from the discipline of my parents.
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My parents have always loved me I believe that even today, although I have no contact with my parents. They love me They just don't understand but my mother and dad worked hard and most
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Baptists couldn't belong to a synagogue Most you people have all done denominations. You couldn't cost you too much money.
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You couldn't do it You see they auction off the position beside the rabbi on his right hand side Every time they have a
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Passover he stands and read the scripture now the one who stands there doesn't get to say anything He just gets the privilege of standing beside the rabbi
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I've seen that sell for four or five thousand dollars if you sit on the eastern side of the synagogue It costs more money than it does if you want to sit on the western side because the eastern side is the east side toward Jerusalem you see and the
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Passover meal will cost you from 75 to 150 dollars Well, they'd cut out most you southern Baptist right there
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Why they wouldn't go with anything if it's gonna cost that much money So don't talk about the Jews being tight dear friends
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If you never get a Baptist give to God you've got him hook line and sinker He's sold out to God if you never reach him get him to reach in there and give
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God what he wants But uh when I moved into my senior in high school, I figured I had a team, you know
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So I came home and I said mother two weeks before final exams. We were starting review.
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I said I want to quit school She says what I said mother. I want to quit school. She says you can't quit school and I said mother
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I want to quit school. I want to join the army. She said you can't join the army If you join the army, they'll have a war some you get killed.
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I said, let me join the Navy I said they don't do anything they sit out on those big ships and white uniforms three meals a day and fire guns 25 or 30 miles, you know, and She says no you can't do it.
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I said well if you won't let me I'll be a bum. I won't work She says well, how do you do what you want to do? You know figuring I'd go back to school next day that night
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I packed up and I left home and I went to Sarasota, Florida Where's a winter carnival grounds for most of your carnivals down in that area and I joined a midway down there a big
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Organization was the world's largest midway at the time They played all the state fairs and there
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I had two jobs They let me operate the little electric cars that bump each other and then I was the assistant talking to the freak show now
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We had ten supposedly freaks now, you know what I'm talking about I've seen people line up for two or three blocks to see something
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It's no more unnatural than than anything else and we advertised when on the dongle hung a bungee a high -flying monkey and we said he'd die from a 150 foot tower into a damp dishcloth and we'd sit and advertise that and I've seen people line up two blocks in the rain to Come in and see that monkey jump from 150 foot tower into a damp dishcloth and they'd come in and we'd have
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Iona the jungle Girl mother nature's only begotten child. She was born of normal parents, but look at her You know the body of a human being the head of an alligator mother nature's only forgotten child here
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She is for a dime ten cents one -tenth of a dollar and on we'd go and we just ratted off and I've seen people come In and they'd come through that thing and walk two miles back down the midway
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Or they get almost out of the gate and they've snapped their fingers They'd say wow, we didn't see a monkey jump off No hundred fifty foot tower in there and they'd come one and back up there, you know
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The show just continuing on on and on and on and so I learned many things from those people
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I learned they were strange breed of people and they had no morals really just they just did their thing and they went on and It was a hard life and I stayed there three or four months and I got tired of it
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So I came back home and my mother said if you're gonna stay here, you're gonna have to go back to school So I said, okay, so I went back to school that same semester all over again
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It's very difficult to believe but whenever I got two weeks before my final exam I came back home and I said mother.
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I want to quit she says. Oh, no, not I said mother I want to quit school. She said you can't quit school. I said
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I want to join the Navy She says let me talk to your daddy. And so off I went and I joined the
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Navy 17 years of age. I went into the Navy and I found out you had to do some strange things there
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I found out you had to smoke but I was already smoking, you know I'll pack and a half of those twice as many filters any other leading brand and I was already saying curse words
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I'd already picked that up and I used to stand in front of a mirror and practice the articulating of those words
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I'd try to say him and I'd walk up to my friends and I'd say one of those words to him, you know And they'd look at me just like I'd nuts, you know
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And I try to use them because I want to be a man and I want to be accepted by everybody I was willing to do anything just right after I was 17 years of age
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I went overseas and came back over there Of course, you know those of you been the military bottle of beer for a dime
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You get a fifth of liquor for dollar quarter a bar So for chewing gum or anything like this champagne for a dollar dollar and a quarter a bottle and in six months period of time
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I consumed over seven hundred and fifty dollars worth of alcoholic beverages I came back on an attack aircraft carrier and I was strapped to a bed
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As I lay there every morning a doctor came in and gave me a little bottle of liquor for medicinal purposes
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And one day he sat down with me and he said son, you're a man now He said we can't follow you around everywhere you go said you're in the service
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He said but I'm gonna tell you something So if you continue drinking like you're doing he said there's gonna come a time in your life
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You're not gonna ever be able to quit now That scared me because immediately I related back to an incident where I'd done something wrong
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And my mother says come here and I walked to the window and she pulled back the curtains and there was a drunk man Going down the street.
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She said you see him. I said, yes, ma 'am She says he's a Christian and if you're not careful You'll grow up to be just like him and that scared me to death when this guy told me
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I was gonna get on liquor For rest of my life. I equated it with a Christian and I figured man I don't want to be a Christian, you know, and listen
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I didn't know anything about being a Christian and it scared me to death So I didn't drink anything as long as I was strapped down there and on that ship
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I came back into Jacksonville, Florida Met a strange young man. I'll just simply call him by the name
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We called him his name was Mouse and Mouse was a very sinister character and Mouse said listen He said, you know, we need a lot of money
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He said we going out here and we were starting to take pills by the end of smoking pot taking pills I'm talking about things drink minutes after shave lotion vitalis hair tonic
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Bay rum sterno can heat break fluid if it had an alcohol base Just about anything
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I could get and strain I'd take it and drink it and by then I began smoking pot I went to a tea party with him one time and he introduced me to pot and then
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I began to pop pills Saffron all aquanail milltown methadrine you name them. I've had them and I began to do this
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He said listen man, it was costing money. And he said you'll make some money. I said, yeah I said, how are we gonna do it? He said well, it's he said what we do said we've got to get some girls to work for us
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I said get some girls to do what I didn't have a business, you know He says well, we get some girls to work for I said, what do you mean?
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He said well prostitution So I said man, can you can we do it and get away with it? He said sure no trouble at all
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So we went out and we got 50 girls these girls work for us in hotels in Atlanta, Georgia Jacksonville, Florida, Miami, Florida These girls had a minimum of two hundred dollars per night that they had to bring in I began making between eight and ten thousand dollars a week
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I have 250 shirts 150 suits 12 pair of shoes two cars I had the whole top floor to a hotel in Jacksonville, Florida, and I was just about to turn 19 years of age well,
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I began to move around the country and I began to run with a group of guys and I came back to my hometown in Nashville, Tennessee And I met a group of fellows there and while with these fellows
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I run into a young man who taught me a unique way of opening this knife and so I became known as the fastest blade alive and I got where this was my accomplishment in life and I began to carry it around with me and One day
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I was walking down the streets of Nashville, Tennessee And I was with two friends of mine and just about every friend I have had one doing 15 years for attempted murder
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One has just been shot by a police department He would had a wanted dead or alive worn out for him Two friends of mine have been electrocuted in state penitentiaries.
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Others have done two or three stretches of three years But we walked up and we saw a young boy there and one of these buddies mine grabbed him by one side and one grabbed him by the other and we was by the
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Tennessee Theater in downtown Nashville and there was a little alleyway going back towards the bus station And they said cut him and I took and put over 150 stitches in that young boy's stomach and in his chest
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And we walked away and he just laid there against the wall laying on his back and he was there crying for his parents holding
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Himself together as we walked away as cold and unconcerned and no compassion real no feeling at all
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So I've been again to move around these boys They were my kind of guys and so they carried pound and a half ball peen hammers with them and one day five of us were
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Driving across the Shelby Street Bridge, which comes from East Nashville to downtown Nashville three paratroopers from Fort Campbell, Kentucky And the 11th airborne were walking across the bridge
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We hollered at him and naturally they hollered back and we slammed on the brakes and said what did you say? And they hollered back
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So we got out and there were five of us with pound half ball peen hammers and three of them One of them took off running got away another one took off running and one of my buddies threw the hammer and hit him in The back of the head we caught one of these boys and we draped him
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Over his arms over the side of the bridge and we began to hit him with a flat side of a ball peen hammer
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I counted every ball 47 times We hit him about the face and about the neck and about the head and shoulders with a pound and a half ball peen hammer
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His eyes were completely closed. His nose was completely gone All the bone tissue in this place face was just completely demolished after we hit him
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He hung in a semi -conscious state and after we hit him with a hammer each one of us stepped up and had to hit him with Our fist when
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I hit that young man with my fist It was a sickening thud and the blow went from one side of his face to the other because there was no bone tissue
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Whatever to hold him together and he just fell we heard the sirens and and we jumped in the car and they cut us off At the bottom and they took us downtown for fellowship
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You know, they like the one to talk to us a little bit and they're very kind and sweet and understanding about these things
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And so we went down with the police officers and stayed there for a while and then we were taken out for identification purposes
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But then another time just to give you some Idea the life that I began to live and the group that I was running around with I was standing in front of the drugstore on 6th and Shelby and there was a
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Negro man across the way and had an old army t -shirt on a green t -shirt and this Buddy, man. I was standing there together.
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He says I think I'll hit him and I thought he was putting me on and I said Okay, get it and so he pulled in a pistol out of his pocket and he fired and The bullet went through a car and it was a man and woman sitting in the car and they were eating ice cream cone
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And the bullet kind of skinned the man across his chest cut his necktie Went over and knocked ice cream comb out of her hand and sped across the street and hit that man on his left chest
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Just below or it would be even with a heart He fell down now There was a city councilman there that kept his light on all the time on his front porch
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And he was had the reputation of that anybody in his area Could come up to his house anytime of the day or night and talk with him
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This man began to crawl towards this house and we ran over and we pulled him back and I put my hand
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Over his mouth and I watched the blood pump from that little hole in his chest as his life
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But began to ever way and the next thing that I remembered was the ambulance driver Threw me off of him and I ran and dove in the bushes and this boy is still doing time for that crime
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Well, I had all the money I needed. Well, I had a young boy working for me He was a Roman Catholic and this young boy paid him $800 a month and he had worked on one day a week
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He flew to the different cities to collect the money from these young ladies that we had people looking over them and he flew these different cities to get this money from and So one day he came to me and he said listen
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He said I can't work for you tomorrow. I said why not? He said well, I just can't and I said why don't you want moment?
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I said, I'll give you $1 ,000 a month He said I just can't work for you anymore And he left and I thought man, this is strange $1 ,100 a month and he works four days out of the month
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He doesn't have anything to do and it bothered me for a long time well one time I went to a ballgame and He was with me and I noticed a girl came walking by a honey barn blue eyes dream
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She came walking by and I said, hey, come here Carl. And he said we want I said, who is that? He said man,
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I don't know. I don't know what her name is. I said introduce me to her He says I don't know what I said, I don't care what her name is. You take me over and introduce me to her
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You know my name He says I don't know who she is, but the guy who plays third base lives next door to her
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He said I know that and so I said, thanks and I went over by third base and it's boy He didn't know me madam. He's warming up, you know catching balls throwing motor first base
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He just planned it smooth over and I said, how's it going? He said all pretty good. How's everything? He says pretty good.
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I said what you know, he said nothing. I said what you doing after the game? He says oh nothing. I don't guess probably going home and I said now listen,
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I'm treating tonight I said we'll get some hamburgers and cold drinks and we'll go to your house And see
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I figured she'd come drifting by and I'd be able to see and so he said nah, I guess I better not I said listen, man
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I'm treating we'll go anywhere you want to go do anything you want to do and we'll go to your house He said I can't and for the first time in my life.
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I was stunned He said I can't go out with you man said I can't have anything to do with you I said why not? He said you're not saved and I froze
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I looked behind me See, I I thought he said I wasn't safe and I thought he knew something I didn't know and I thought that there was somebody after me and so I figured
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I'd better check up You know, so man, it scared me to death and I jumped in my car. I went back to my hotel room
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I got in and locked all the doors pulled the shades down and got my pistol out and laid on the table and I sat There and shook for about 30 minutes scared to death and I thought sure but you see
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I found out her license number But I traced it through and got her unlisted phone number One of the most popular girls.
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Well this ball team that I went to watch had SJ PB on it Now as far as I was concerned that meant should jabob or something, you know
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I didn't know what it meant, but it meant st. John's Park Baptist Church, and I've never been in church in my life
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I didn't know what they were doing out there. I mean, I knew about ballgames, you know, so I watched this I called this girl and I said listen,
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I told her I was she says I know who you are So I thought well the reputation has preceded me, you know, she's she's aware that make it even easier and I thought
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I said well Listen, why don't you and I make the scene? I said we'll go somewhere and she said no, I can't go out with you I said listen, you name it.
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We'll do it. I said, you know anything you want You want some new clothes you want you coat your new car and she says
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I can't go out with you I said why not? She said you're not saved and I thought man Here's two people that told me something so I hung up and man
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I stood there and I shook for another 30 minutes I was scared to death. I lived in constant fear of dying
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I had everything money could buy all I had to do is pick up the phone and I could get anything I wanted night or day and I was scared to death.
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Well mouse came to me And he said listen, we ought to open a club. So I've been thinking about opening a nightclub in Key West, Florida I said man, that sounds pretty smooth.
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Let's do that. So we went down to Key West, Florida. We opened a nightclub there I spent $8 ,000 cash the next day to supply that place with all the bar fixtures and all the liquor everything and now we cater to every
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Prostitute we cater to every sexual pervert. We cater to every underground we cater to every
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Degradated deviated creature that there was an area boy, but we kept it so dark in there You didn't dare get up out of your seat
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You'll never find it if you came back we sold it later on and it is still there the building is still there and it's still being used as a nightclub and One of the large ones down there
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And so we were moving in this and one time mouse come to me said we're going to a party and I want you to Go so we went over and we'd been popping some pills and everything and I have a dope kit with me
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It's over the pastor's office. I didn't bring it in and he showed me some a joint He showed me a eye dropper and a 22 gauge needle and a rubber band everything and I said man
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I'm not for that stuff and I said no man. I don't want that stuff I'm not for it and he gave me my first shot of heroin.
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I slipped it underneath my hand, you know And and I liked it. I really liked it. It was a great feeling to me
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They didn't tell me you see that after you get hooked There is no more high after you get hooked on it.
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You got to have it just to be normal They didn't tell me that they said I could get high Well, I could until I got hooked and then
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I began to shoot regularly and my habit cost me from 75 to 150 dollars a day
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For my drug habit. Well, I had to have more money So we opened our club up and we got it moving.
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So we moved into gambling We began to have floating gambling things and we'd have card games going on using
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Marked cards that used to come out of Kansas City. You could buy them other crates down there Marked cards and everything and so we'd do this and we had everything going in and I was running pretty consistently around $10 ,000 a week 19 years of age had everything that I wanted.
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Well, I Saw Carl one day and he came over said I want to talk to you And I said what you got on your mind?
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He said, you know what? I said what he said Jesus loves you and I said who I thought he had somebody for me, you know
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And I said, where does she live? He said no Jesus loves you. I said who he said
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Jesus You know, there's something about the name of Jesus if you've never heard it You still know you don't want to hear it if you're lost
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It's just something about the name of Jesus that does something to a lost man or woman boy girl And that name just flew all over me and I knew it didn't want to hear it and I said man
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I don't care for that stuff. I don't even want to hear about it He said no Jesus loves you and he was grinning and I said if you say that to me again
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I said I'm gonna hit you as hard as I can and I said, I'll tear your head off your shoulders He said Jesus loves you and I caught him
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And he fell back and he looked up at me and he says yeah, he loves you So I began calling this girl.
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I called that girl every day at four o 'clock for six months every day I call up and she'd say no and hang up no and hang up just no and hang up Well, I found out like some of you guys did if I could get mama on my side
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I could get her say so I began to send her mother flowers and candy and I sent her everything and I could just hear that Mother, you know why he seemed like such a nice young man
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Why here I was a drug addict running prostitutes and gambling and everything else and just because she's getting a few gifts
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She's telling her precious daughter. He seems like such a nice young man I don't see why you don't go out with him invite him over or something and I knew that she's working with me
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You know, so I kept calling this girl and calling this girl and calling this girl. And then finally They got me
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Carl can't tell me says why don't you ever read your Bible? I said man, I know more about the Bible than you do. I said man,
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I want you ever read to see I didn't have one He said won't you ever read and I said I said I'm not afraid to read said yes, you are
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And so he had an Old Testament. He said here you are read it. So he handed to me I said where you only started said
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I don't care wherever you want to start and they kept on bugging me about it I got into Isaiah and he came to me one day and he says, where are you?
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I said what difference it makes? So where are you? Oh, what's it to you? He said come on. Tell me Where you reading? I said
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I'm in the book of Isaiah. I said, where are you in the fifth third chapter? I said, yeah, he said well if you don't see Jesus there, you're not gonna see him said you don't have to read anymore
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And I said man, there's no Jesus in here and I read it to him I said Jesus not in there and I closed my Bible. I said great.
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I said see I've caught you He said no, he said but it talks about him. It doesn't call his name, but it talks about him
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I said man, you're out of your mind And so they found out that they weren't getting anywhere with me and so I called this girl one time
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She said I'll tell you what I'm gonna do. She says if you'll go to church with me She says I'll go out with you and I said church man.
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I never been church my life I'd heard about it. So I said, well, let me call you back So I called this girl up and I said listen,
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I'll go with you, but I can only go on Wednesday She said all right be in my house And she told me when I got to her house 20 minutes before church time.
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She lived seven minutes from the church So I walked up there, you know and boy I was decked out hair greased back and I had 21 inch drapes and 16 inch pegs and you know and had a
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Sport coat black and pink look like somebody different hand and pink paint and did like that at it and boy
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I was all decked out and you know, I come strolling in there didn't have sense enough to ring a doorbell I'm beating on the door, you know
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Her mother came door and opened the door and says won't you come in and I walked in a few minutes later This good -looking dream came walking through the door and she just came floating in.
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She had a big black book on her arm She walked over to him and spoke and she said would you like to sit on the couch?
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And I said, yeah, I'd sit on the couch. So we sat on the couch and she opened her Bible She read me two chapters from the
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Bible. I don't know what she read She didn't say would you are would you like to she said let's pray She bowed her head and she began to pray she got up walked the door and she says it's time to go
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We went out and I got in the car and I thought I'd impress her with the pipes, you know So I let them rack off real good I let those things rack off.
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I look she's staying outside the car and I said aren't you going and she said yes Open the door. So I reached open open door.
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She says you come around here and open it up I said when did it set in she said what I said paralysis. What's the matter with you?
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So I went around and open the door and she got in, you know, and I slammed that door closed and We got in we went to church and like most typical babish, you know,
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I wasn't a bad shit I was well on the way to being one. I said on the back row I got as far away many things I could and that's where I said and I sat back there and I didn't know anything is
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Going on so it didn't bother me much But I started doing this on Wednesday nights. I took this girl back home that night
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She said and she said would you like to sit on the couch? And I said now here it is Yes, it is this church stuff is a front see now things cause her mother daddy's coming on the baby
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And so wish she said don't sit on the couch I said, yeah, you know just a little lamp on in the fireplace going and I thought boy here it comes now
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Everything's gonna be real cool and smooth now. She opened the Bible read me two chapters of the Bible She bowed her head and said let's pray and she prayed she walked the door and said it's been a wonderful evening
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She said I hope we can do it again soon. And I said, is that all she said? Yeah, I said is that it?
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She said yeah, I said no, I don't play that stuff I said, I don't believe in this stuff by going out the girl not kissing her on the first date
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I said, that's that's that old stuff. I don't believe that and I heard somebody breathing behind me and I turn around look
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There was a big German Shepherd And that dog looked like he might like kosher food. And so I wasn't gonna give him a shot at me
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And so I kind of snuck out I found out later on that dog was an ex -war dog And that dog loved her and her parents told me that at night when she went to bed that dog lay across her or her
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Doorway in her bedroom if they got up to go to the kitchen or anywhere else in the middle of night They had to call her and wake her up She called the dog in they went back and come back then the dog went out there and laid across her doorway again
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And that dog loved that girl dearly and her dad and I never got along this girl There were some reasons for it
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I'm sure one night I was sitting in there and and you know this dog sitting there They had a big drive out there in the mailboxes way out on road
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It was nighttime and he'd come in from work And I heard him get out of the car and I heard the mailbox open that dog standing at the door all tense
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You know and his ears straight up and his teeth are showing he's beginning to get a low growl You know and so I reached over and unhooked the screen very lightly and I threw the door and hollered get him and that dog was gone
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You know He just come leaving the cross. It didn't take him long. I heard some go Out there, you know, we're out there and she came running out and I'm running along beside her
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You're not saying I don't know how that dog got out. I just don't understand it She's saying Oh daddy daddy daddy, you know, we ran out there her daddy
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He's lying out there and males that were in that dog is confused because that dog recognizes friend
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But he's been told to get him and that's confused him and the dog is standing there wanting to bite nothing to bite and the guy he's not moving, you know and her daddy worked around cemeteries and He asked me what time
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I came in. He was cleaning a shotgun. He said you want to go hunting. I said no I don't want to go hunting with you and But anyway
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This is the way I was moving along and many things I could tell you But I want to tell you how God really began to move into my life in closing
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This young girl wouldn't give up on me. She got that church to pray for me this church began to pray for me twice a week and They began to pray all sorts of things and I met a businessman a boy who's now a member of our board of directors
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Mr. Jack Ramsey was a commercial artist and an advertising agency in Jacksonville, Florida And I rode with him one day and he had a little sign on the glove compartment of his car
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And it said be ready to grab the wheel for in a moment I may vanish you know said the driver may vanish in a moment in a twinkling of an eye and just Remember that you could have gone with me and I used to think he was a little off, you know
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And I'd always sit by the door. I'd never seen anywhere else by the door You wouldn't get me caught in the middle because I figured if he's gonna leave that car
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I was gonna leave that car and I didn't understand that But I began to go to church on Wednesday night and Reverend Charles jr.
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Jr. Jr. Was the pastor of the church and I had a meeting with him not too long ago and he's my spiritual father and he was humanly speaking and he was preaching in this church and I'd sit in the back and the choir or the
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Congregation would sing the first verse of a song and I'd quote the second verse then sing the second I'd quote the first I'd hum
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I'd make bird sounds. I'd clap my hands. Somebody'd say amen. I'd go one two, three. Amen And so I'd say praise the
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Lord. I go one two, three praise the Lord, you know, and I'd mock them And this little girl got so embarrassed.
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She wouldn't even sit with me half of the time She'd just get up and leave and so they saw that they weren't getting too close to me
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And so she finally told me she's I can't go out with you anymore I said why not? She said you have to go church me on Sunday I said man
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Sunday and I started figuring up again, you know Most people don't well if I gotta go on Sunday and I was willing to go just to be with her
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Say I was willing to go if I could just be around her So she was all the time. Only place we ever went was church
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Every Wednesday night brother when I went with her, she read me two chapters of the Bible She prayed I took her to church after church.
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I took her right back home She read me two chapters of the Bible and prayed and out that door I went and that went on for some six or seven months and I was willing to do it
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Because I wanted her and I was willing to be around her and I was willing to go through anything to be around that living dream and Of course,
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I figured it maybe eventually I might you know, get her to work for me something I didn't know and this is my goal.
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I thought just like a lost person thinks a lost boy I can't think one way I don't care who he is What kind of family comes from and this was my thinking but finally they got me to go to church on a
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Sunday night First Sunday I was ever in church I don't know anything about what that preacher preached
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But they had some poles like you've got it back here and there were three of those big poles And I'll never forget it
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The church was split in two sections not this minute But in two sections and I said on this side and I said right behind that pole
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And that pastor he had leaned out and he had preached and he'd point that finger out not lean the other way Well, he was pretty sharp and he didn't lean the other way and he had pointed out that way and I was leaning from side
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To side and he was going right with me and he was pointing that finger and it seemed like that thing was just touching the
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End of my nose and I don't know anything about what that man preached But I know that when we stood the choir stood in song and when that choir lifted their voices,
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I'll never forget It's the old Broadman hymnal on the left hand side of the page is number 100 Soft and tenderly on the right hand side of the page is number 101
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What would you do with Jesus and they got down to the chorus of the first verse? And that's the first time
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I heard anything they were saying and it said what will you do with Jesus? Neutral you cannot be and someday your heart's going to be asking what will he do with me and I began to think for the first time about my relationship to God and This little girl stand beside me and she's saying
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Lord, please save him Lord If you'll just let him ask you to come into his heart Lord, let
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Jesus come into his heart Lord Please save him. I said if I don't shut up I'm gonna hit her and she just keep on saying
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Lord, please come into his heart Lord Please save him and she just kept on and it was driving me out of my mind and I had my head bowed
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My eyes became a little moist for the first time in a long time I always thought it was kind of sissified to cry
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You know, you weren't much of a man if you cried and my life began to move before me in a panoramic view
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I thought about the time I grabbed my kid sister around the neck and held her and took a bottle of beer and poured it
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Across her face as she screamed and cried to get away from me and I recalled in some Incident where I came home howling pills
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One night and narcotics and almost beat my kid brother to death as he lay in the bed and woke up the next morning with blood caked all over his little body just a youngster and I remember the time that my mother tried to whip me and correct me and I grabbed her by the hand and almost broke her arm by twisting her arm
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And my dad told me he was gonna whip me one time and I remember I told him that if you ever lifted a hand To me I'd kill him and under the influence of drugs
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And I began to remember the guy that we shot and I remember the shootouts We had in the gang fights and all the other stuff
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I remembered all the girls that I'd gotten on drugs and that I'd got out into prostitution And I remember the young boys that I sold drugs to it and helped them find drugs and became
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Addicts and I remember my own life and I remembered all the hell on earth that I had lived and all that became came before my eyes in those moments and I lifted my heart to God for a first time in a long time
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And I said Lord you couldn't do for me what these people are saying you can do I said
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I've done too much and I've gone too far I've done too many things I've alienated myself from you And I don't even know where I got that verse of Scripture unless I got in that girl
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But a verse of Scripture came to my heart and it says him that cometh to me I will in no wise cast out and the choir were singing again.
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What will you do with Jesus? Neutral you cannot be and someday your heart will be asking what will he do with me?
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And I said Lord, I don't know how to do what these people are saying I said, I just don't know how to do and I began crying and tears began to flow and I thought everybody's looking at me
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I'd be embarrassed and I looked around and nobody was watching me and a verse of Scripture came to me and I knew where I got
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That one Jeremiah 29 13 and you shall seek me and find me when you shall search me with all your heart
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And at that moment when that verse of Scripture came into my heart, I felt an arm around my shoulder
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I said that preachers come back to get me and it scared me and I looked and there was nobody there I felt another arm around my shoulder and yet there was nobody there and I testify to you
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Before this Word of God and as God is my judge Somebody walked down that aisle with me and yet there was nobody there
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Somebody had their arm around me and I lifted my eyes to the pulpit and where I should have seen a preacher
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I saw a great flowing white robe come down in that pulpit and where I should have seen a preacher's head
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I saw the most blinding light I've ever seen in my life And I knew that in my heart that I was meeting the
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Son of God and I didn't understand it I came down in front of 1 ,100 people and fell on my knees and the pastor came over and he said
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Rocky What is it? I said man, I don't know He said what do you want? I said man, I don't know what I want. He said what are you doing down here?
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I said man, I don't know and he called the chairman the deacons. Mr. Lehman Ward. He said brother Ward pray with him
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He's lost and we knelt and he prayed he said now Lord. I'm gonna ask Rocky just ask you what he wants you to do
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He said Rocky. I want you to pray. I said, I don't know how to pray He said just tell God what you want him to do and I prayed and I said
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Lord if you can prove to me right now That Jesus Christ is the Son of God And if you'll let me know that he can do for me what this man is saying you can do and what these people say
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I'll give you my life and I'll serve you as long as I can and as long as I'm able to do it and in those moments
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Just like that the burden of my life was lifted the guilt was gone and I had complete peace
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I got up off my knees and since that moment, I've never had a desire for a cigarette I've never had the desire for alcohol.
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I've never had the desire for narcotics. I have no withdrawal symptoms I came completely off of heroin after being addicted to it for a year and a half
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I came completely off and those moments as God gave me deliverance Well, naturally
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I want to tell my parents So I didn't know how and so I asked the pastor would be art this girl went with me said, all right
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So we went home Drove to Nashville, Tennessee got there and I walked in the front room with not
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Tried to memorize John 3 all the way up there. She drove the car I walked in with a lot of zeal and no knowledge and I took the
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Bible open to John the third chapter and I put my Mother's lap and I said mother I won't tell you about the most wonderful thing that could ever happen to you
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And my mother looked at me said what is this that I've read the Bible I said you've not seen this and she says John What is this?
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And I said mother this is about him for whom we've sought This is the one that we've longed for So long and I remembered my daddy
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How that dear old man used to lift his hands to the heaven night after night and he'd say law how long?
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How long is he'd cry out to God that he'd send the Savior that he'd send the Messiah to us
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How long must we waited yet? We didn't know there were people like yourselves that never told us we didn't know and my dad used to cry and tears would flow down his face as he'd cry and weep for the deliverance of God and For the moving of the
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Spirit of God in our lives and yet we were completely ignorant And my mother looked at me and she says you're crazy
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You're crazy. So I went upstairs And I went into my bedroom
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What used to be my bedroom and I knelt and I prayed and I said Lord I don't know what to do. And I said
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I'm ignorant But I want to tell my mother my daddy about Jesus And if I can just tell him what's happened to me help me to do it
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My dad came home that night My mother told him what happened and my dad told me said unless you give up this idea of Christianity Unless you give up this stuff that you're on now, it's just another kick in your life
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He said you're no longer welcome in this home So I left not too long after that a little year or so later.
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I was married And after I was married I drove all night long I figured I'm married now that'll make a difference
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So I came up at two o 'clock in the morning. We knocked on the door my mother dad they came to the window and They spoke to me through the window and said you're no longer welcome here and I said mother
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I want to talk to you and she says you're not to come in this house And so I left and drove all night that night back home.
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I stood Some almost two blocks away from my mother and I've seen her move around in the yard porch
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Watching moving around the house. Just wanting a glimpse of the one that I love more than my own life
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Just wanting to see her. I've stood in the presence of my mother once I've seen my mother twice since I've been a
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Christian I stood in her presence for some 30 minutes and I had her keep her back turned to me constantly
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And as she walked away, I saw my mother spit up on the ground because of my love for Christ Since that day
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I've never heard from her. I do not know where she lives And I'm dead to my people
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I've not seen my dad but twice since I've been a Christian My kid sister wrote me a letter less than four months ago
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Telling me that unless I quit sending her tracks That I was no longer the writer. I sent her a little track
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To try to show her what happened to me. I may be dead to my people
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And I may never see my mother and dad again, but I want you to know this It's worth it all
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It's worth it all. I wouldn't have my mother's love if it means giving up my Christ Jesus means more to me than anything in this world.
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I've tried to serve him and I failed him. I buried my last son Last December, so don't talk to me about heartaches and tragedies.
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Don't tell me how hard you got it in life That's a pitiful excuse we use for not serving Jesus I've buried two sons and I don't understand it.
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I'm away from home some 35 weeks a year But I know this I've never been disappointed one time in Jesus Christ and my heart's desire
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Is that I might speak to my mother to tell her about Jesus my brother my sister and my dad
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And every time I stand to preach And I look out and see mothers and dads sitting together
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Never telling one another that you love Children sitting around never telling your mom and daddy that you love
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When you no longer have that privilege you wish to God I'd give one I'd give my life
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To be able to go back and spend each day over with my parents to tell them how much
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Christ loves them And what he can do for them. I don't know the outcome of my life.
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I don't know all that God has for me But I know this That if I never see him again
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This is the most thrilling the most dynamic and the happiest thing that's ever happened to me.
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I don't need your sympathy I'm happier and I've ever been in my life. I Preach to you people all week long with a broken heart.
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I Preach every day with a broken heart because every morning I get up and I spend the first 20 minutes of my life
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Thinking about what Jesus done for me and I spend the last 20 minutes of my day thinking about how I've been What Jesus has done for me?
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And I wouldn't take anything for it Jesus says he that loveth mother and father more than me is not worthy of me and He that loves his son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me
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What have you got in your life that means more to you than Jesus? your husband your wife
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Your children your education what means more to you than Christ? I wouldn't have anything in this world has to offer if I had to give up Jesus Christ.
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He's not a crutch for me He's my life He's the fulfillment of my life. He's meaning in life.
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I have the answer to meaning in life guilt Death, I have the solution to all my problems.
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I don't know if my mother and daddy will ever become a Christian I pray for them daily. I have many people
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I have 3 ,000 people that pray for me every day I've got a lot of mothers and daddies and a lot of brothers and sisters
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Father, I thank you that you love us.
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I thank you that you care. I Thank you that you changed my life
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Lord I thank you that a wandering Jew Wandering away from thee no hope no peace no happiness
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Everything but what I needed and then a teenage girl introduced me to Jesus Christ And you changed my life.
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I went into a Baptist Church much like this one where people loved me and people cared about me and people were willing to Help me and that dear pastor that guided my life and that deacon and his wife that let me live with him for some five years
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I Thank you for those precious people that taught me the New Testament And taught me about the saving grace of Christ and his power to change men's lives
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And Lord, there's a lot of question about him today, but God the answer rings. Sure. He changes the life
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Father, I simply ask that these people will commit themselves wholly and new to Christ husbands and wives can come and Renew their vows to Christ.
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They can make their home a Christian home Children young people who haven't told their mothers and dads they loved him for so long.
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I pray That they'll renew their vows to Christ if they're a Christian regardless of our denominational affiliation
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Regardless of our status in the church or community. I Pray that you'll bring the people to Christ for the young men and young ladies
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For the mother dad in this service that has never ever for that first time Invited Jesus Christ into their heart to be their
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Lord and Savior. I ask you Lord to speak to their hearts Help them to forget everything that I've said to them this night
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Except that Jesus Christ can change their life Lord, he's the way the truth and the life
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No man comes to the father, but by him that excludes everything and every religion that excludes everything else
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It's only through Christ Jesus. I thank you that without the shedding of blood.
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There is no remission of sin You said when I see the blood I'll pass over you Christ our
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Passover Crucified and sacrificed for us. I thank you for him who loved us and gave himself for us
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I pray that people will consider Jesus Christ tonight because I ask it simply in the name of Christ Jesus our