Above All, Love

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Take out your Bibles and turn with me to Colossians chapter 3, and go with me to verse 14.
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For the past several weeks I've been going through verses 12 to 15, and we've ordinarily read verses 11 to 17 as our opening text, but for today I'm just going to read verse 14 because that is where we want our attention.
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And honestly, the context is important, but we're going to focus in primarily on just the idea that we find in verse 14.
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Over the past two weeks we have asked the question, who are you? We said that that can deal with our identity, I am who I am, but it can also deal with our character, I am what I do.
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Paul reminds us in Colossians 3, 12-15 that our identity is that we are chosen, holy, and beloved, but that our character should reflect our identity.
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Because we are chosen, holy, and beloved, we ought to put on these things.
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Put off the earthly, put on Christ-likeness.
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And you remember what those ten things are, mercy, kindness, humility, meekness, patience, forbearance, forgiveness, peace, and thankfulness.
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But above all these, put on love.
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So today we're going to examine more closely what it means to put on love.
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Let's read verse 14, stand with me.
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And above all these, put on love which binds everything together in perfect harmony.
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Father, by your mercy and grace, keep me from error, open the hearts of your people to the truth, particularly of this most greatest truth, that we are to love one another as Christ has loved us.
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Give us attentive ears, open hearts, in Jesus' name, amen.
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Every Monday morning I sit down and I begin to think about what I'm going to preach the week ahead based upon what I preached the week before.
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Sometimes I feel that I should move on, and sometimes I feel like there's just a little bit more juice you can get out of that lemon, there's just more in the text, there's more that can be found, there's more that can be mined, there's more gold in them there hills.
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And as I was thinking this week, as Brother Andy and I were driving all day Monday to get to Mississippi, I was thinking, well, I could go to verse 16, and I like verse 16.
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Verse 16 talks about speaking to one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, and I like that.
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I like that verse, I like that idea.
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But as I was considering what I preached last week, I remembered that when I went through the ten characteristics of Christ's likeness, which I just read to you all, I really didn't give much attention to love because I was going through ten.
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And Brother Matt, after service last week, had just mentioned to me, he said, hey, if you spent another week on love, nobody would be upset.
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I don't think that's what he said, but it's like what he said.
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You know, keep on.
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So I got to thinking about that on the drive out to Mississippi, and I said, you know, another sermon on that one subject wouldn't hurt.
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And boy, isn't that true today.
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So, we are going to talk about love.
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We are going to break this passage down.
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I don't know how long I'm going to go, and I don't know how short I'm going to go.
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I have a lot to say, and I don't want to say it all, because quite frankly, I just don't know that I can.
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But I do want to show you one thing about love from another passage, because this passage, while important, is short in the grand scheme.
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I mean, it really just says, above all these, put on love.
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And in the Greek language, there's a little bit of a question about the phrase above, what that means.
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It is the preposition epi, and epi means on top or over or above, right? And so, there's two ways to translate this.
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It can be translated as, above all these, put on love, in the sense that over everything else, love is.
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Or it can be, in addition to these things, put on love, because when you add things, you put it on top, right? If you're stacking something, you can't stack from the bottom, you stack from the top.
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And so, the preposition epi can simply mean put on top what you've already got, which is mercy and meekness and all those things.
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And so, you're left with sort of a question, is Paul here addressing the concept of priority? Or is he addressing the concept of amount? Like, you've got these things, now add one more thing.
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And I tend to lean on priority.
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And my reason for that is not because I can prove that from the exegesis of this text, but because that would agree with another text.
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And so, I'm going to take you to the other text.
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But you understand what I'm saying, right? There's two ways of saying it.
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It's just an addition, or it's the thing that's over everything else.
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And that's what I am convinced that we should consider, that love is above all.
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And I base that not on this, but on 1 Corinthians 13.
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So, turn to 1 Corinthians 13, if you would.
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In 1 Corinthians 13, we have the chapter that is typically referred to as the love chapter.
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If you've ever been to a Christian wedding, you've heard it.
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Because it's read at every wedding.
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But can I tell you today, it's not about Christian weddings.
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It doesn't really even have the love of a husband and wife in view, even though it can apply to a husband and wife.
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This is actually about love within the church.
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This is about love within the body.
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And you say, prove it.
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Okay, read 1 Corinthians 12-15.
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It's all about the church.
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Well, the whole book is about the church, but specifically chapter 12 is about how every member of the body has his gift.
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And every gift is important.
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And a hand can't say to the foot, I have no need of you.
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The eye can't say to the ear, I have no need of you.
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Because everybody has its place in the body.
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And we all have gifts, and every gift matters.
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But the greatest gift is love.
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And that's when you get to chapter 13.
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And what's the love in the context? It's love within the body.
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Because it's the gifts we're in the body.
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And so is the love in the body.
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This is love for each other.
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This is love right here.
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So verses 1-3 give us the priority of love.
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Verses 4-12 give us the picture of love.
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Let's look first at the priority of love.
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He says, if I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal.
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And if I have prophetic powers, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have all faith so as to move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing.
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And if I give away all that I have, and if I deliver up my body to be burned, but have not love, I gain nothing.
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You understand the priority Paul is setting on love.
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He's saying, everything else is second.
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I can speak in tongues.
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Great.
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Do you love them? I can prophesy miracles.
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Great.
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Do you love them? I can offer up all my money, all my flesh, everything, and I can die for my faith.
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Great.
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Do you love them? You see, that's what Paul's saying.
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He's saying all those things are important.
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We're not diminishing the gifts.
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We're not diminishing those things.
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But we're saying when done without love, they mean nothing.
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And Alistair Begg has a terrific illustration about this, and I came in early this morning to put this on the screen because I didn't think I could explain it with mere words.
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He said, I want you to think about how we use numbers.
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He said, you know, 100 is one, zero, zero.
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1,000 is one with three zeros.
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One million is one with six zeros.
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And then you get to the trillions, and then you get to what Mark Zuckerberg has, and you get all the zeros, right? But if you take out the one, you're left with zero.
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You see, it only matters if it's got the one in front of it.
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If it doesn't have the one in front of it, all you've got is a big bunch of nothing.
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And that's what Paul's saying about love.
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He is saying if you don't have love, you can have everything else.
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But without love, it is nothing.
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Without love, it is nothing.
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Above all, love.
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That's the priority of love.
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And we're supposed to love one another.
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We're supposed to love one another as the body of Christ.
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And somebody asked the question, well, what is love? And it's not an easy question.
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I was with Sunday school class this morning.
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I had four young people in my class.
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Jennifer was in there with me.
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And I asked the four young people, what is love? And to their credit, they gave some good answers.
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Talked about kindness and giving and those things, which is one of the ways love is defined.
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So it was good.
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But I pointed to the fact that in our vocabulary, love is too broad.
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Because I can say I love my wife.
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And I can say I love pizza.
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And I can say I love movies.
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And you know I ain't saying the same thing three times.
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Because our word for love has such a broad spectrum of meaning that sometimes it becomes meaningless.
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Because if something means everything, it means nothing.
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So the Greeks were a little more specific with their use of love.
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And they were more intentional about the words that they used.
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Many of you have heard this before.
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It's nothing new.
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But I do want to remind you that there are several words that are used for love.
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One is not in the Bible, but it is in Greek literature.
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It's eros, which means the love of romance.
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Eros is the love that's supposed to be shared between a husband and a wife only.
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It's the love of intimacy.
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That's where we get the word erotic.
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It's intimate.
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And that is good.
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It's good to have romance within the bonds of marriage.
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It's good to have intimacy.
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One of the men this week, and I do encourage you, if you don't listen to any messages from the conference, listen to the one of the guy who was in a coma for several months.
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And he came out of it.
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And he talks about it.
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And it's such a powerful message.
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And his wife's loving him through it and caring for him.
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He said people would walk by his hospital room and look in and say, You're the guy.
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And he said, What do you mean I'm the guy? You're the guy who's not supposed to be here.
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Like he survived this terrible ordeal.
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And he was telling the story about how now on this side of it, he said, Every morning I wake up, I lay with my wife for 30 minutes, and we just hold each other.
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And every night before I go to bed, I just lay with my wife, and we just hold each other.
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That's that intimacy that is to be held in the bond of marriage.
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And it's precious.
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It should be precious.
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Right? So we don't diminish that, but we say that's its own type of love.
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That's not for everybody.
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That's for one.
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The next word that we see, and this is in the Bible, but it's only in the Bible in the adversative.
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It's the word storge.
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Sounds very nice, huh? And the way that it is in the Bible is it's in the adversative.
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So the only time we see it translated is the translation of the word astorge.
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Astorge means without natural affection is the way it's translated.
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But it literally means without love that you're supposed to have naturally.
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Like when you have a child, you by nature love that child.
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Not because they're always lovable, but because they're yours.
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Right? And if you don't love your child, there's something unnatural about that.
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That's astorge.
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It's not natural to not love your child.
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Right? And so that love that's familial and natural is called storge.
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And it's an important type of love, and it's a necessary type of love.
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It's what bonds families together.
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That's why it hurts so much when they're broken.
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Now this next one you've heard before.
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I'm sure if you've done any type of Greek studies, and that is the word phileo.
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Phileo is the prefix.
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If you are familiar with Pennsylvania, I know Dale is, Philadelphia is called the city of brotherly love.
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And the reason why is because phileo is the word for love, and adelphos is the word for brother.
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So philadelphos, Philadelphia, is brotherly love.
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And phileos is a love that is shared between two people, and it's usually mutual.
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It's a friendship.
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It's a love between two people.
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But then there is one other word, and this is the word most associated with Christianity.
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In fact, the early Christians would have a feast, and they called it the agape feast, because the word agape was the word that the writers of the New Testament used when they were describing God's love for us.
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And I don't make a huge distinction between phileo and agape, because sometimes they're used interchangeably.
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In fact, when Jesus was next to Peter after the resurrection, and he says to him, do you love me? Peter says, yes, you know I love you.
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And he says, do you love me? Yes, you know I love you.
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Remember the three times? It's interesting that he says, do you agape? Do you agape? Do you phileo? The third time he says it in the Greek, it's actually philos, not agape.
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And that's an interesting parallel.
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So there are some parallels between phileo and agape.
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Sometimes I think the divide is too wide when people make it such a big deal.
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But there is one thing about agape that I do think is important that we should always understand, is agape is a love that is not dependent upon the object.
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You see, I can love you without you loving me back.
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That's self-sacrificial love.
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And that's the way God loves us.
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So that's the way that God defines his love in Scripture.
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For God so loved the world that he gave his only begotten son, that whosoever believeth in him will not perish but have everlasting life.
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That's the way God loved us.
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He loved us in a self-sacrificial way.
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For God sent his own son into the world for us because he loved us.
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And he did that action while we were yet sinners.
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Christ died for us.
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It wasn't because we deserved it.
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It wasn't because we were owed it.
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And it certainly wasn't because God had to.
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God didn't have to love you.
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But he chose to love you.
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Therefore, he calls you to love one another as he has loved you.
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Jesus said that in John 13 after he had washed the disciples' feet.
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And you remember that scene? Jesus stands.
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He wraps himself in a towel.
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He pulls the men over to him.
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And he gets down on his knees.
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The one who created the feet was washing the feet.
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The one who created the water was using the water.
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The hands that molded the universe were wiping the crusty feet of men who walked everywhere they went.
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And it was right after that that Jesus said, A new commandment I give to you.
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This is John 13, 13.
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I'm sorry, John 13, 34.
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A new commandment I give to you that you love one another.
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Just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another.
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And by this all people will know that you are my disciples.
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If you have love for one another.
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See, that's Jesus having just given the example of washing the apostles' feet.
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Now stands up and says, You see what I did? You see how I loved you? I loved you enough to get down on this dirty floor.
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I loved you enough to embrace your feet.
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And I loved you enough to wash those feet with my own hands.
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That's how much I loved you.
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Therefore you now have an example of how you are to love one another.
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So I want to say this.
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Biblical love that we are called to have for one another.
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Biblical love is not merely an emotion.
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It is a decision.
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Biblical love is not merely an emotion.
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It is a decision.
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Because guess what? I can't choose to like you.
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Don't get mad.
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We don't all like the same things.
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And I'm not everybody's cup of tea.
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I get that.
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We all have differences.
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But Jesus didn't say, Therefore like them as I have liked you.
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He said, Love them as I have loved you.
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Because like is not a decision.
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I didn't choose to like chocolate ice cream.
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It chose me.
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Driving back.
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Brother Andy knows I'm doing a low-carb thing.
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And he drank a chocolate milkshake in front of me.
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And he tried to get me to do it.
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You see? Trying to get me to.
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I like Brother Andy.
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I do like Brother Andy.
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But that's the thing, right? Is we don't choose things like that.
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I didn't choose to like certain things.
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It's just what I like.
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But I can choose to love.
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Because love is a choice.
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Love is a decision.
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Love is an action.
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It's not merely an emotion or words.
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John Stott said this.
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He said, Love is a servant of the will.
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Not a victim of the emotions.
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Write that down.
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Take a picture of it.
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Send it to somebody.
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That is the truth.
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Love is a choice.
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It is not a victim of the emotions.
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It's a servant of your will.
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You will either choose to love or you will choose to not love.
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But it will not be because your emotions got in the way.
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It will be because your will got in the way.
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You will not love.
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You understand the difference? We're not commanded to do the impossible.
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But we are commanded to do the hard.
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And sometimes it's hard to command the will.
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To do what's right.
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And love even those who don't love us.
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You know, Jesus said, Love your enemies.
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The sad thing is a lot of people have...
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They think that's...
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They're like, Hey, that's in the church.
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We shouldn't be enemies here.
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We disagree about things.
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We don't have to be enemies.
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We can still love each other.
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And we can still be friends.
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And we can still care about each other.
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We can still do things for each other.
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If love is a victim of my emotions, this command would be impossible.
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But because it's a servant of my will, it is possible.
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And it's a choice.
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And it's a choice I'm commanded to make.
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How do I do it? I put others before myself.
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I have to.
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That's the command.
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That's what love is.
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To love you when you're unlovable.
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To love you when it's difficult.
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To love you in all of this is to love you by putting you before myself.
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When I was a kid, we always had a fruit bowl.
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It was always on the center of the table.
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And we still have it today.
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If you come to my house, we have a bar right when you walk in.
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And it's always got bananas and apples.
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But some people, if you go to their house, they have a bowl of artificial fruit.
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And maybe that's you.
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And that's fine.
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But artificial fruit is not made for consumption.
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It's made for decoration.
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It can fool the eyes.
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But it won't fool the tongue.
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And if you bite into a piece of wax fruit, all you're going to leave is teeth marks.
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It will have no pleasant taste.
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And it will have no nutritional value.
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When we look at the world, it is enamored with the concept of love.
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More songs have been written about love than any other subject.
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Entire movie genres are dedicated to it.
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Just about every social justice warrior on the planet defines himself as a champion of acceptance and love.
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The problem is the love of this world is wax fruit.
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It has a vague appearance of the real thing.
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It may even fool some for a time.
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But when you compare it to real love, all you get is a poor waxy substitute.
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So what separates wax fruit, that kind of love, wax fruit love, from real biblical love? Worldly love is almost always based on personal feelings, attractions, and mutual benefits.
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It is self-interested, conditional, and fluctuating.
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It is often motivated by personal pleasure and a desire to fill one's own needs.
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Simply stated, worldly love is rooted in the flesh.
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But the love we are called to have for one another within the body of Christ is not based on merely emotions and attractions.
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The love we are called to have is rooted in choice.
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God chose to love us.
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Therefore, we must choose to love one another.
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Not merely to fulfill our own needs.
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Not merely to satisfy some conditions.
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Not merely out of self-interest, but because Christ has loved us, we are to love one another.
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And the love that we are to have is best described in three passages.
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These are the three passages.
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And you'll notice I use the color thing to show the connection point.
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Colossians chapter 2, I'm sorry, Colossians chapter 3, verse 12 to 15.
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Put on then as God's chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience, bearing with one another.
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And if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other.
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As the Lord has forgiven you, so also you must forgive.
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And above all these, put on love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony.
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And let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, to which indeed you were called in one body.
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And be thankful.
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That's the way Paul describes it in Colossians.
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But then you go over to Galatians and he says this.
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But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, gentleness, faithfulness, and self-control.
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Against such there is no law.
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Notice how many words cross over between those two.
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But then you go to, that should say 1 Corinthians.
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I'm sorry, that's an error on my part, but it should say 1 Corinthians.
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It says love is patient and kind.
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Love does not envy or boast.
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It is not arrogant or rude.
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It does not insist on its own way.
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It is not irritable or resentful.
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It does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices in the truth.
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Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.
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And verse 9 says love never fails.
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What is love? That's love.
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You want a definition? God gives you a definition.
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You don't have to figure it out for yourself.
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You don't have to listen to the latest talk shows or figure out who's telling you what love is.
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That's love.
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But the problem we have, and this is a problem that I hear often.
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Someone will say, I know I'm commanded to love, but my love is imperfect.
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I constantly fail.
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I'm not always patient.
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I'm not always kind.
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I do sometimes envy.
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I do boast.
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I am at times arrogant.
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And I am far too often rude.
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I have demanded my own way.
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I have resented.
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I've experienced joy in others' failures.
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And I've gotten upset when others succeed.
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So does that mean I give up on love? No.
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But it does mean I look at it differently.
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Because I mustn't see love as my contribution to my salvation.
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Love is the work that God does within me because of my salvation, not to earn it.
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And my ability to love is totally dependent on God's love of me.
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That doesn't give me an excuse.
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But it does give me hope.
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It doesn't give me license.
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But it does give me comfort.
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I am reminded every week that I'm not all that I should be.
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But thanks be to God in Christ I am redeemed.
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And he is growing in me patience, kindness, gentleness.
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And he is lovingly fashioning all who are his into his likeness.
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No sermon like this should ever end with, here's what you're not doing, go do it better.
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Because that's not the gospel.
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Do better, try harder is not the gospel.
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So instead I'll leave you with this.
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Here is what we're all not doing.
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There.
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All that.
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So let us repent and look to Christ.
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And find in him the completion of what we lack.
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And pray that he will conform us daily to his own image.
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And sanctify us by the blood of his cross.
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See this is where we need Christ the most.
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Jesus succeeds in loving us more than we fail in loving him.
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Let's pray.
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Oh Father God, your mercies are amazing.
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And your grace is astounding.
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I pray even now Lord that you would by your grace.
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Remind us all of our command to love one another as you have loved us.
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And above all else that we are to love.
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And Father I pray for those who know Christ that our love would expand.
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That our Christ likeness would increase.
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That our sanctity and sanctification would continue to grow.
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But for those who do not know Christ Lord I pray.
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That you would open their heart to believe.
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And I pray it in Jesus name.
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Amen.