Elder Installation Service

God’s Faithfulness in Raising Leaders for the Church

Well, everybody can make your way over here to find some seats. Thank you for joining us tonight. This is an exciting night. A little over three years ago when 12 .5 Church started, one of the main prayers that we had in the midst of wondering where is God leading, what's God doing, is he truly calling us here to establish a body of believers?

And so one of the main prayers was God, we asked that if you're calling us to this, raise up leaders. Raise up men that are qualified overseers to help with the shepherding of whatever people that you bring to this congregation.

And knowing that Christ said he will build the church and the gates of hell will not prevail against it. And so he was most certainly going to provide. He was gonna provide the leadership, he was gonna provide deacons, he was gonna provide men and women and their giftings and servings.

And so tonight is an exciting night of just seeing God's faithfulness and his provision in the life of this church. Many of you, if not all of you, already know Brother Keith very well. Brother Keith has already been shepherding.

He's already been caring for people. He's already been walking with you and living life with you. Him and his wife Karen and their family faithful to this body. And so tonight we are thrilled to present him for installation as an elder of this congregation.

But before we do that, I would like to pray and then I'm gonna ask Pastor Jeremiah to come up. He's got a few words for us about the office of overseer that I think as we gear our minds towards what's happening tonight, we can clarify and understand the immense weight and the calling of what it is that we're doing tonight.

So please pray with me. Dear Heavenly Father, oh Lord, thank you. Thank you for your providence in our lives. Thank you for your provision, for all of our needs. King Jesus, you are building the church.

This is your bride, this is your people, this is your work. And so we are grateful to you. We're grateful that you have brought the Hennick family this way. You have providentially raised Keith up in this body to join Pastor Jeremiah and myself in the oversight of your bride here at 12 .5.

God, we know that it is you that is working. So Lord, be honored in tonight. I pray that Christ would be shown magnificent and in his glory in all that we do tonight. Not us, but you and you alone. We thank you in Christ's name, amen.

The Office of Elder and the Biblical Model of Plurality

Right, testing. Can y 'all hear me yet? Yes, close, close, testing. Well, tonight is a very special night at 12 .5 Church. We are officially commissioning and ordaining Pastor Keith. So, as I was talking with Pastor Nathan, I just said, I'd love to be able to share biblically why this is so important.

That's why we did it on a Saturday evening because we wanted to set aside special time to show our church family, we are gaining another pastor. And so here at 12 .5, you're gonna hear Pastor Nathan, I emphasize this all night, but we don't have a senior pastor, right?

We are unified in our leadership and we are bringing unique giftings to the table. And so we've seen this in Keith's life. And so, as I was thinking more about what to share about eldership, I wanted to just tell you some of the joys that I've been able to experience over the past year.

I believe it was last summer around there where I was officially commissioned to be an elder. And I've been in ministry for many years and I've been able to be a part of those joys of seeing people that are newly converted to the faith that are looking to King Jesus for the first time in faith.

That's one of the things in ministry as a pastor and elder that we constantly are praying for. And I've been able to see it a number of times here at 12 .5. I've also been able to be a part of baptisms, those special times in people's life where they get to declare their faith to the church body and to the world.

And so that's so good. Like when you see someone coming to the faith and being baptized, this fills your tank back up. Because as we're gonna talk about, being an elder is not easy. It's a calling from God.

It's not like one of those jobs where you punch in the clock and get paid a certain wage. It's a whole life and it comes with great difficulties, but it also comes with great joys. Some of these joys are also teaching, preaching, and discipleship.

Something that I pray that you've experienced here at 12 .5 is being poured into by older men and women looking to their faith as they are looking to King Jesus, imitating them. And I just wanna tell you how much of a joy it's been serving side-by-side with Pastor Nathan.

I can't think of anybody else I'd rather be in the trenches with than Pastor Nathan. And now Keith will be a part of this plurality. And so we're making it official. We're going to commission him formally and ordain Keith as an elder here at 12 .5 Church.

I've been personally observing Keith for the past two years. I want you to know something. Keith has been in pretty intense training for two years to be an elder. This particular office is not just somebody we pluck someone off the street or just somebody that's able to lead a pep rally, stir emotions.

No, this is something that is done carefully and methodically. And so I've been observing Keith for the past two years. I've seen his absolute love for the Lord. And this man loves the word of God. It's so evident.

He has a learner's heart and he desires to show himself approved, rightly handling the word of God. What I'm saying is Keith is the real deal. And so the installation of a new elder is both wonderful and it's very serious.

In every church, the quality of the spiritual maturity of the people directly reflects its leaders. The office of elder is a sacred office. The Bible does not take lightly this office and it's up to the members of 12 .5 to guard the office of eldership.

And like I said, we don't just pick somebody off the street. We have to call, we have to receive someone who is called by God. Okay, it's a calling. And if it is a calling, then other people, the people of 12 .5, we will be able to see and attest, yes, that is true what God has placed in his heart.

And so the biblical model for leadership in any church is a plurality, meaning more than one. Okay, a lot of churches have what's called a senior pastor model. This looks like Moses in the Old Testament that bore the weight of every detailed responsibility.

Moses couldn't even handle that, right? This is somebody that desires to be a jack of all trades and becomes a master at none. We are not meant to carry the weight, the intricate details of everything that goes on in a church.

Rather, a church is to be led by multiple pastors as a plurality. And so this is, we believe this is the biblical model for leadership. We are under shepherds that unite together in the spirit, pointing everybody to the chief shepherd, Jesus Christ.

And so that term elder originates from the Old Testament. And so it does go back to the days of Moses when he figured out that he couldn't lead the people of God by himself. Eventually, there became 70 elders, those that were helping in leadership, making decisions that served as judges.

They resolved conflicts and exercised general oversight. And so that word elder is also used many times in the New Testament, over 70 times, and half of them refer to the office of overseer. And so elder simply is referring to somebody who is spiritually mature.

A lot of times we think of the word elderly in the biblical sense as talking about someone who is spiritually mature. Remember Paul said to Timothy, don't let anybody despise you for your youth. But a lot of times, elder does refer to someone who is older and carries many life experiences that's interwoven with wisdom from God and his word.

And so we're gonna be also laying hands. You won't be seeing any of this going on up here. We are putting hands on Pastor Keith to show that we are in unity. This was an Old Testament practice where the people would give a sacrifice to God and they would lay hands, signifying that they were all in this together.

And so that's what we plan to do, is to lay hands on Keith to identify his calling as pastor and elder here at 12 Five Church. And so in the New Testament, the apostle Paul focuses on the character of an elder.

He doesn't really focus on the function and all the things that he's accomplished in his life. He's saying an elder has a state of life that has a completely different character than the rest of the world, and has shown that to be one that emulates King Jesus.

A man of God, an elder, a man can only be an elder unless these three things are true. Number one, that he has the greatest love in his life for the Lord and the Word of God. Psalm 138 verse two says, Oh Lord, you have exalted above all things your name and your word.

So an elder cherishes the Word of God in his heart. Number two, a man of God that's seeking to be an elder must love the bride of Christ. There is an unquestioned loyalty for the bride of Christ because an elder actually serves for the rest of his life.

I've heard of other churches having elders that take turns and will step down and rotate. And you have to understand, if this is a calling from God, then you can't do anything else. In fact, we read in Matthew chapter 16, when Jesus says he will build his church and the gates of hell will not prevail against it.

This is the only institution that God created that will be sustained forever. The church is the manifold wisdom of God. And if you are called to shepherd and care for the church, this is a lifelong pursuit.

And so number three, a man should never be an elder unless he believes he is called by God. You have seminaries that can help equip people for positions, you have boards and committees that help prepare people for opportunities, but only God can call a man and make him fit.

And if he calls somebody for eldership, then he will make sure that he is qualified for it. First Timothy chapter three, verse one says, the saying is trustworthy. If anybody aspires to the office of overseer, he desires a noble task.

It's a noble task because that desire is God given. It's a calling from God. But Paul also says that he has to aspire. Very interesting word that means to stretch oneself out in order to touch, in order to grasp something.

This means that a person that's aspiring for the office of elder is taking active external steps and becoming an overseer of the church. Others will be able to visibly see the calling in this man's heart and in his life.

This protects the church from men that say, well, I'm called to preach no matter what anyone says. A lot of people say that. Well, how do we know that that calling is true, right? If someone just says they want it, okay, we understand internally that has to be true, but that has to be demonstrated for other people.

If you truly are called by God, then it'll be evident that you have a love for the Lord, that you care for the people of God. And hear me with this, you must be diligent to study, to teach and preach the word of God.

And I can tell you, this is true with Pastor Keith. Been observing him for two years and even more than that, seeing that, yes, this seems that God has been working this in his life. Me and Pastor Nathan have seen these external disciplines that Keith is a learner at heart.

He is a studier. And when we have those conversations, bounce ideas, you can tell that he's listening to wise counsel. And so we asked Keith over two years ago to prayerfully consider if this is a calling that God is working in his heart.

And so after some time, Keith said that he did believe that this is a desire that he has, but he had to give it time, which, you know, some people are really quick to jump an opportunity to have some level of authority, oversight in the church.

He said, let me pray back. And so we were able to come together and affirm that this was truly what God is calling him to do. And so the New Testament calls the office of elders to a really high standard.

And I want us to ask this question, why are the standards so high? It's because the people of the church will most reflect the leadership of its elders. The prophet Hosea in the Old Testament said, the people of God will be like their priest.

Jesus said in Luke chapter six, everyone after they are fully trained will be like their teacher. The man of God who is called to this office as to be an elder, to oversee and pastor the flock sets an example for everyone else to follow.

Think about it like this, the way that the leadership goes is the way the rest of the church goes as well. And so I want us to be informed that we're gonna be using a lot of different terms that are all pointing to the same office.

You're gonna hear us use words like elder, bishop, overseer, and the word pastor. These are all synonymous with one another and depend a little bit on the translation that you use in the Bible. And so I want us to look at one passage.

I'd like for you to hear me read this passage in first Peter chapter five, where the apostle uses three of these terms to refer to this office of eldership. Peter says, I exhort the elders among you as a fellow elder, Peter says, and a witness of the sufferings of Christ as well as a partaker in the glory that's going to be revealed.

Shepherd or pastor the flock of God that is among you, exercising oversight as an overseer, not under compulsion, but willingly, as God would have you not for shameful gain, but eagerly, not domineering over those in your charge, but be examples to the flock.

And listen to this. And when the chief shepherd, right? We are under shepherds, pointing you to the chief shepherd. When he appears, you will receive an unfading crown of glory. Likewise, you who are younger, be subject to the elders, clothe yourselves, all of you with humility towards one another for God opposes the proud, but gives grace to the humble.

And so if you do have a Bible with you, I'd like for you to turn with me to 1 Timothy 3. So many of you are aware that this is where we see many qualifications of what it looks like to be overseer in the church.

And then here in a minute, after we go through these qualifications, I want us to cycle back and look at that phrase, to be above reproach. And as we're going through these qualifications, I want you to think of Pastor Keith.

I want you to think about these qualifications. Does this reflect the life of Keith? So number one, we see that the elder, the overseer, is to be the husband of one wife. This means that he is sexually pure, right?

His devotion is to his bride. He is called to love her like Christ loved the church. And I have to emphasize this. Nowhere in this passage, do we see anything about female elders. Nine times we see the pronoun he.

It's never mentioned of it or she, always he. And he is to be the husband of one wife. Number two, he's to be sober-minded, which means that he never lets anything cause his mind to be unclear. Why? Because there'll be times in overseeing and guarding the flock where you will have to make a decision.

Your mind needs to be clear and filled with the spirit, filled with the principles of God's words to make decisions. We are called to be sober-minded. Number three, self-control. This means that he must be prudent, self-disciplined.

Number four, respectable, means that he is orderly, steadfast, systematic thinker, especially in how you relate to one another. Number five, hospitable. You know, this word means to love strangers. And so if someone says, well, I'm really hospitable, but I'm not really into reaching out to people I don't really know.

Well, you're not very hospitable, right? And all Christians are called to this to some degree because we have been loved with a transcendent love that has changed us from the inside out and that should cause us to love strangers.

And so the overseers of the church, elders of the church, they are called to be distinct in being able to show this to the body and to outsiders. And number six, this is what ultimately distinguishes deacons from elders.

Elders must be able to teach. An elder must be a gifted teacher, which presupposes that he is a learner and studier at heart. Not just someone that uses deep phrases and words with no substance. We are called to shepherd the flock.

I'm reminded of the words that Jesus told Peter kind of towards the end of, before he ascended, he said, he said, feed my lambs, Peter. And what he's saying is he's saying, feed my people. How would Peter do that?

Well, he would feed them with the word of God, right? Earlier in the same gospel, he says, sanctify them in the truth. Your word is truth. And the point is, is a elder is able to teach the word of God, to exhort, to feed the flock and to guard by contending for sound doctrine.

Number seven, not a drunkard. This means that he's not addicted to alcohol that leads to the sin of drunkenness. Rather, he is, like we said, sober-minded and filled with the spirit. Number eight, not violent.

Means that he avoids fighting. He has a gentle spirit and has a forgiving spirit and easily pardons mistakes from others. Number nine, he's not quarrelsome. He is a peacemaker. Number 10, not a lover of money.

Meaning that he does not have greed and he does not covet, right? He desires to be a good steward of what God has given him. Number 11, he manages his own household well. He desires to love his bride like Christ loves the bride.

And he desires to rear up his children. And in Keith's case, also his grandchildren in the fear and the admonition of the Lord. Number 12, not a recent convert. Meaning that this must be a mature Christian with growth and spiritual wisdom.

And I can tell you this, that is true of Keith. And then number 13, he has a good reputation. People on the outside look at him and realize that he is a walking testimony of integrity. Okay, now I believe all of these qualifications are really pointing back to the main one of being above reproach.

In 1 Timothy 3, verse two, we see a verb that says that he must be above reproach. Must be, means that this is required with no exceptions, absolutely necessary. This verb is in the present tense, meaning that this isn't just true at one time in his past life, but this is the ongoing demonstration and quality of his life.

Above reproach means that he has unquestionable character. He's living in a state of blamelessness. There's nothing in his life that would indict him against scripture, not just in actions, but also in attitude.

And I want us to hold the brakes and saying we're not talking about perfection, right? Because only Jesus would be the only elder if we're talking about perfection. We're just saying that there's no obvious lingering character issues that he's not actively seeking to take care of.

Rather, he sets an example with his life to bring the Lord honor. And so this is a picture of Pastor Keith. As I was looking through some of these notes that Pastor Jerry did at my ordination, he quoted Richard Baxter, the English Puritan pastor from the 1600s.

This is a quote that he said, "'Take heed.'". So he's talking about men of God. "'Take heed to yourselves, lest your example contradict your doctrine, lest you unsay with your life what you say with your tongue, and you be the greatest hinderer of the success of your own labors.'".

I believe this Puritan writer is saying, "'Practice what you preach.'". And Keith, as you already know, when something goes wrong in the church, where is Keith, by the way, right there? Keith, as you already know, when something goes wrong in the church, people are gonna blame you.

They're gonna blame me. They're gonna blame Nathan. They're gonna blame the leadership. The elder is one of Satan's chief targets in trying to undermine the church. He goes after the leadership, and then he goes after the families.

Elders must carefully guard against wrong thoughts because those thoughts lead to actions. The elder must be resolute and unashamed regardless of what is thrown at him. And so how does an elder protect himself against the onslaughts of the enemy?

We have three tools that I want us to be mindful of, Keith. And so I'm talking with Keith here. Y 'all just get to kind of listen in to this conversation. Keith, the first tool is scripture. Psalm 119, verse 11 says, "'Your word I have treasured in my heart that I may not sin against you.'".

The psalmist is speaking or saying that the Lord's word must be embedded in our hearts so we do not yield to temptation. It doesn't guard us from temptation, but it will help us put up defense barriers and not yielding to the temptation.

A daily dose of scripture will help us prevent the enemy's attacks and being complacent in ministry because that's easy to do, to become complacent. And that's what Satan wants us to do. He wants the leaders for us to be complacent so everybody else will become complacent.

So the first tool is the word of God, and number two is prayer, the second tool. You'll always find the elder in the word of God, in prayer. And so that's the first thing out of his mouth. And when someone needs prayer, it's not that you have to go to the elder to say, hey, will you pray for me?

You just gotta let him know what the problem is so he will be able to pray about it. And so we utilize prayer. And something that's wonderful about Keith is on Tuesday mornings, I've seen him pray for the body, intercede for the rest of the saints, along with other men and women of the body.

So thank you for that, because you know how important prayer is. And number three, the third tool is fellowship. It's hard not to help somebody that's family. In 12 .5, we're a family, aren't we? I feel it.

I know I can call any one of you, whether something good that's going on or something bad, I know that I'm gonna have prayer and we're gonna rejoice with one another, we're gonna weep with one another, and we're going to intercede for one another's needs.

And so ministry togetherness is a byproduct of doing eldership properly. And so when we're talking about being above reproach, these are characteristics that we're striving after. With unimpeachable characteristics, understanding that we're looking to the chief shepherd, Jesus Christ.

And so I want everybody to hear this again. It's so important that the future of any church depends on the quality of its leaders. The elders are the leaders of the church. These are the means that Christ is using to build his church.

And so we are blessed to have Keith join the eldership of 12 .5 Church. So those were three tools, but I also have five instructions for you, Keith. Number one, stay true to the gospel. No matter what anyone says or what kind of pressure is thrown your way, don't listen, stand firm on the gospel.

And number two, shepherd the flock. Treat the people of God as you would treat yourself or your own family. Number three, intercede for the people. When you see a need, take care of it. You're right there, you'll love them.

And number four, be a caretaker, be a volunteer. Whenever there's a need in someone's life and you see it, it's your role as an elder to care for that person, regardless of they ask for you, you're there, right?

And we do this in unity with one another. And number five, be a protector. Be a protector from the naysayers, people outside of the faith that will try to sway people from the truth. You have to be a great protector and throw scripture in Satan's face and saying, I'm standing on this, no matter what you throw at him.

So I also have instructions for the members of 12 .5. Number one, I would say be submissive to Pastor Keith and the rest of the plurality of the elders. We have a calling from God to serve you, but listen, ultimately, we are called to serve the Lord first.

If you do something that veers from scripture or the will of God, we are called to bring you back to the truth because we have to give an account one day for your souls. And so I wanna mention that scripture that comes from Hebrews chapter 13, where we read, remember your leaders, those who spoke to you the word of God, consider the outcome of their life, imitate their faith, obey your leaders and submit to them for they are keeping watch over your souls as those who will have to one day give account.

Let them do this with joy and not with groaning, for that would be of no advantage for you. And so number one, be submissive to Pastor Keith. Number two, clothe yourselves with humility. Get to know the word of God and we will all share in the mind of Christ and we will be unified together in the spirit.

And lastly, number three, allow your elders to serve you with joy. Pray for us, please. There's so many things that we don't tell you about that we wanna guard you from. So just know that when you're like, man, Jeremiah's being really direct right now.

Hey, I love you, right? Sometimes that's couched within other things that you don't always see or know about, and that's okay, right? If you ask my wife, sometimes we start talking about certain things, I'm like, hey, this is probably all that's sufficient for you to know, because I'm called to love and protect her as well.

And so this is the heart of a pastor, to equip you for the good work. And the last thing I wanna leave you with is I wanna share with you something that's expressive of the heart of the Apostle Paul, because he too was an elder, trying to equip the saints that God was putting in his life to be salt and light in this dark world.

Paul said in the book of Philippians, he says, among you shine as lights in the world, holding fast to the word of life, so that in the day of Christ, I may be proud that I did not run in vain or labor in vain, even if I'm to be poured out as a drink offering upon the sacrificial offering of your faith.

And pause, right? This is not just something you clock in and clock out. This is a lifelong calling to be poured out as an offering. And he says, let's do this with joy. I am glad and rejoice with you all.

Likewise, you should also be glad and rejoice with. Let's pray. Heavenly Father, very excited for this evening. What a special day to be able to officially ordain and commission and install Pastor Keith as a pastor and elder and overseer of 12 Five Church.

Lord, we love you. We pray for your blessing. God, just please shine brightly in our hearts as we go out into the world. We praise things in your name, King Jesus, amen.

Keith’s Testimony and Call to Eldership

Pastor Jeremiah, thank you so much. Brother Keith, come on up here. So if any of y 'all were a part of the last installation service that we had with Pastor Jeremiah, you'll be ready for this moment. This is a time of examination.

Me and Pastor Jeremiah have walked with Keith over the past, well, now it's been about two and a half years hasn't it, Keith? Karen probably knows. It's been about two and a half years, right? So we have been walking with you and we have been examining you.

Just so you know, there's a reading list. In the past two years, Keith has read, I think it's 34 books. How many of you have read 34 books in two years? He did it. And we're not talking novels. We're talking theology books.

We're talking lofty things. And every single one of them able to communicate about that information back and forth with us in dialogue. He has written papers. Keith has written a number of papers. As a matter of fact, it was pretty extensive.

We were pretty impressed with how precise he was trying to get with each one of the questions. And there are hundreds of questions. And so it has been a lot of long hours. I don't think you could have done it in that short amount of time had you not been retired.

Could you?

No, I don't think, no way.

So it was quite the challenge. But for your sake, y 'all haven't been in those meetings. You haven't been watching over his shoulder late at night while he's trying to consume these books or write these papers, do this research.

You haven't been a part of that, understandably. And so what a great time for us to be able to hear just a few things from Brother Keith. And so I'm gonna ask just a few questions. First off, I'm gonna ask your personal testimony.

I'm gonna let you share that here in a moment so everyone hears the standing that Keith has first and foremost with his Savior, Jesus Christ. And then we're gonna ask a few more questions related to some theological matters so you can hear from him, hear how he responds, how he handles the word, how he handles truth.

And then we, if we have time, we're gonna open up a moment where y 'all can ask questions and kind of put him on the spot here. That's, is that all right, Keith? All right, all right, well, Keith, go ahead.

I'm planning to make my answers real long. Real long, drags fewer questions.

Well, why don't you go ahead and share with everyone your personal testimony in Christ?

Okay, can everybody hear me okay? Okay, sorry, it's hard to hear back here. You know, when I was young, I was raised in a middle-class family in North Little Rock, Arkansas, not really wanting for much.

We went to church every Sunday, to an Episcopal church, and we would come home and the Bible would be put on the shelf and wouldn't be taken back off until the next week. The only time we prayed as a family was when we were having a meal.

So I really didn't have a really good understanding. I mean, I knew who Jesus was, but I really didn't know Jesus. At the Episcopal church we attended, I went through confirmation, and I can't remember what age that was.

I think it was around 10 or 11, somewhere in there. And you memorize the Lord's Prayer and Apostles' Creed, all these different things, and then you're confirmed. And so, you know, I got to check that box.

I'm confirmed, I believe Jesus is the Son of God, so I'm a Christian. And that's the way my mindset was as I grew older. But when I graduated high school, and, or my senior year, actually, I ran into something that would control my life for a long time, and that was drugs.

Drugs took a hold of my life and turned me into a completely different person than I was. I went to school, met Karen, we got married, had two children, and I became a very hard man. I was hard, I was selfish, I wanted everything for myself.

I wanted to do it my way, and when I wanted to do it, and how I wanted to do it, and everything else was second tier, including my job, the church we attended, my two sons, and my wife. Everything I wanted was for me.

And this went on for quite a long time. Karen and I started having some problems because of this. She woke up one night and told me that she had had a dream, a vision, and the Lord had come to her, and basically, long story short, said he was gonna take Chris if she didn't start taking him to church.

And she told me that, and I told her, you know, I don't know if I wanna be married to a woman that goes to church. That was my attitude. That was what I did not want. So she started going to church with Chris, and so eventually, I figured I was gonna have to play the game if we was gonna have a good marriage.

So I started going to church too, and I became pretty adept at playing church, you know, putting on the show, knowing all the right words to say, and I even convinced myself still that I was confirmed.

I knew who Jesus Christ, I believed Jesus Christ was the Son of God, so I was saved. So anyways, we went on, and things did not get better, of course, because I remained who I was. And one day, she came up to me and said that she didn't think, she didn't love me anymore.

And so we started looking at lawyers. Then one day, she came in after counseling and said, well, I can't leave you because our pastor says that there's no biblical reason for me to leave you. Of course, not only did I wanna go to church with a woman or be with a woman that went to church, I didn't wanna be with a woman that didn't love me either.

So we kind of parried back and forth, and about this time, something in my mind told me I needed to get a little bit better control on my life because all the cracks were starting to get really big and separate, and my life was starting to fall apart.

I realized that of all the things I thought I could control and make happen, I couldn't do anything. I couldn't keep anything together. I was about to lose my marriage. I was about to lose my sons. Everybody at work had come to know who I was.

I was about to lose my job. Everybody at church knew I was putting on a sham when I came to church. And I can remember one day, I was riding in the car, and I said, this is gonna be a day I'm not going to do drugs.