TLP 254: What Your Children's Toys Are Teaching Them

Truth.Love.Parent.

Subscribe

Download

Share

00

00:05

What are your kids toys preparing them to be? What do modern games accomplish? Today we're going to discuss how to exercise discernment choosing toys and games for our kids

00:15

Welcome to Truth. Love. Parent. Where we use God's Word to become intentional premeditated parents.

00:24

Here's your host A .M. Brewster If this is the first time you've tuned in to Truth. Love. Parent. I welcome you

00:29

My name is Aaron and I am a husband and a father But I'm also the house dad at Victory Academy for boys where every year

00:35

I invite eight at -risk teen boys to live with me so that I can introduce them to Christ and help those who submit be conformed to the

00:42

Image of their Savior. It's a very hard job, but it's also extremely rewarding

00:48

Imagine a house full of terrorist teenagers I'm sure the potential stressors are easy to picture but imagine what it's like when even one of them submits to God I live and work in a place where we must depend on God for absolutely everything because there's nothing we can do to make this

01:03

Place work. Now after describing a place like that the next question may seem strange

01:08

But if you would be interested in ministering in a place like that or know of someone who would I'd encourage you to call

01:14

Victory Family Ministries at 715 -759 -5976

01:19

We'd love to see if the Lord would have a place for you here as well We have a number of positions we'd like to fill everything from seasonal interns camp counselors and even house parents

01:29

So regardless of what stage of life you're in whether you're graduated from college or you're married with kids There may be an opportunity for you.

01:36

I thank you for taking the time to join us for this discussion today It's a little different than normal, but I think it will be a welcome challenge to your thinking

01:42

I know it was for me. But before we do that, I want to thank Kara and Jess for making today's episode possible

01:48

They're two of our patrons who love you so much that they give to TLP every month so that we can continue producing

01:55

Free parenting content that will draw your minds to God's will for our parenting You too can play a part as well

02:01

If you like to give a one -time donation or commit to supporting us on a monthly basis You can click the five ways to support

02:07

TLP link in the description of this episode and then click on any of the PayPal buttons on that page But you can also be a blessing to Truth Love Parent and Team TLP by rating and reviewing the show on iTunes and recommending

02:17

Us on Facebook your support connects us with searching parents and helps to spread God's plan for parents all over the globe

02:23

Already this year. We've been downloaded in over 47 countries Now before we move on here's one more interesting tidbit about me.

02:30

I am a martial artist and it's funny that after 250 episodes or so. I haven't really talked about the martial arts in regard to your kids and family

02:39

I do plan to do that It's a very interesting topic and there's a lot the Bible has to say on the subject, but today we're talking about toys

02:46

Now the genesis of this discussion was quite unexpected for me Normally, I scour the scriptures for topics that will help us to become the intentional premeditated disciple -making parents

02:56

God called and created us to be but this show was inspired by something very different Now before I tell you the story if you're new

03:03

I'd like you to know that we have some free episode notes and show transcripts at truthloveparent .com on our blog taking back the family

03:10

Okay, so my family is a homeschooling family and we're always interested in finding family outings that are both fun and educational

03:16

So my wife found this unique little museum in Appleton, Wisconsin It's a little history museum

03:22

But it boasts the largest collection of information and exhibits in the world concerning Harry Houdini because he used to live there

03:27

Well among other things I also used to be a professional magician So we decided to check it out and it was a lot of fun

03:34

If you're ever in the area, it may be a very interesting stop for you So anyway They had some other exhibits and one of them was this very interesting little exhibit featuring a bunch of antique toys and games from the 1950s

03:45

They had model trains and a couple of the original Barbies and all sorts of other cool stuff They even had a

03:50

TV that played a ton of black -and -white toy commercials from the 50s and 60s Walking through the exhibit.

03:56

I was struck with something significant As I looked at all the miniature drive -in theaters and rocking horses and doll houses and flight simulating kid -sized

04:04

Cockpits and trains and army -themed toys. I realized that modern kids don't really have access to those types of toys anymore

04:11

Sure, girls can get baby dolls and you can find army men but just plain old horse figurines and jump ropes and stuff like that are things you find at the dollar store or Really expensive toy boutiques.

04:22

It's one or the other. They're not the type of thing That's pushed in the average toy section of everyday stores

04:27

It's not the stuff that kids really want and I had to ask myself why?

04:33

But the answer didn't come until I noticed the theme that ran through the vast majority of those 50s toys

04:39

But before I tell you what it was, let me say that God values play. In Zechariah 8 4 through 5

04:47

We read this Thus says the Lord of hosts Old men and old women shall again sit in the streets of Jerusalem each with staff in hand because of great age and the streets

04:56

Of the city shall be full of boys and girls playing in the streets Here the Lord is giving us a glimpse into the peaceful and prosperous city of Zion This is the way it should be children should be playing in the city of God But the

05:11

Bible doesn't really discuss the content of our children's play. I'm Mentioning all this because I'm gonna make two observations today

05:18

I'm going to discuss the general theme of 50s toys and the general theme of modern toys And then

05:23

I'm going to discuss some biblical principles that should help us interpret the two observations and discover a valuable application for our children

05:31

Okay, so here's my observation about the toys from the mid 20th century If you really sat down to look at the toys and games you would discover that most of them were child -sized versions of adult activities

05:44

It may be a dollhouse or a play kitchen. It may be the toy drive -in theater I mentioned earlier or a model railroad or Lincoln Logs The vast majority of toys were designed to give children the opportunity to practice or play at being an adult

05:59

Check it out for yourself. Go to the museum. Do a Google search ask your parents You'll find that the vast majority of toys were created to help children learn or at least pretend to do the same things adults were doing

06:12

The same goes for a lot of the games available back then there was Monopoly, Life, Risk, a game called

06:17

Careers, Stratego, Park and Shop, and many more like them. Now before I move to the second observation about modern toys

06:25

I will quickly admit that there were toys and games that had similar theme to what we see today back in the 1950s and often those were some of the more popular toys and games and that will make sense here very shortly as well

06:36

Now consider the vast majority of games and toys produced today At least the ones that fill the the aisles at Walmart and Target There are so many and I don't really want to date this show too much by naming specific action figures and princesses and video games and card games

06:51

But I think you'll agree with me that if you walk through the toy game and video game sections of Walmart What I'm about to say is true

06:58

Whereas the playthings from the 50s were equipping children to do things that adults do.

07:03

The playthings from the early 2000s are equipping children to do what? To become what?

07:10

Think about it. See if you can come up with the same conclusion that I did. I believe our kids are being encouraged in everything they do to exist and be successful in a fantasy world

07:24

Think about it. They're rearing dragons, killing zombies, pretending to be princesses, flying imaginary spacecraft, battling monsters, fighting supervillains, and creating fantasy worlds in which to live

07:37

When our parents and grandparents played they were practicing to be adults They were being doctors or they were being train engineers or they were being soldiers.

07:46

When our children play they're practicing to be aliens zombie hunters and dragon masters. They're practicing existing in a fantasy world

07:56

Let that sink in for a moment Our kids are filling huge chunks of their days practicing to be fake people

08:05

Now I can hear it now Aaron, everyone knows that imagining and pretending are desperately important for a child's development.

08:11

Please understand what I'm not saying Okay, I am NOT saying that imagination is bad.

08:17

In fact, I advocate for the exact opposite I am NOT suggesting that pretending to be an imaginary creature is bad

08:23

If you watch my kids play for even 30 seconds, you would see that I'm also not saying that fantasy games are bad for our kids development or that they're not good for our kids development

08:32

I'm saying that we have an entire generation of young people who want nothing more than to disappear into a non -existent reality for as long as they can each and every day and Practically, none of that experience they're having is going to positively equip them for life and godliness

08:51

Now before I try to help us gain some biblical consensus on this topic I also want to point out that those of you with very young children may not see what

08:59

I'm talking about Your kids are playing with dolls and play -doh and Lincoln logs and pretend kitchens and horses and army men

09:05

I know. Our American society generally promotes the importance of giving young children educational toys, and I think that's a fantastic idea

09:13

But then our kids learn to hate school That's right They learn to hate school and we decide that they need an escape from their lives because it's just so darn hard and they get

09:23

Addicted to the endorphin rush of being the god of their own universe And instead of looking at toys and as an extension of our children's development like we did when they were younger

09:32

We start viewing their toys and games as amusement the word amuse literally means no

09:39

Thinking our entire philosophy about toys completely changes when our kids get older We go from let's choose toys for our kids that will help them think better To let's allow our children to choose games that will help them think worse

09:53

Now let's be fair we the parents would probably continue encouraging our older kids to do valuable things as well

09:59

But when they started showing little interest in educational games and whining that they're the only fourth grader without a phone we capitulate

10:07

We allow our kids to dictate our philosophy on toys games and entertainment

10:13

So to start our section on practical applications for today's observations number one

10:18

We need to be the parents We should have a consistent philosophy of family that extends to all that we do and be grounded in God's Word When we tell our kids they need to submit to God and their parents

10:32

Except when they're locked in their rooms creating their own reality and fortnight We're lying to them.

10:38

We're teaching them that there are slices of their lives where they are not required to submit to God Now I'm gonna make this clear later

10:46

But I'm also not suggesting that for us to be the parents that means our children are never allowed to pretend

10:52

That's not the point, but I'll clear that up some more soon Number two, we need not just be parents

10:58

We need to be ambassador parents our philosophy of family and life including toys needs to be one grounded in God's high biblical

11:07

Expectations we need to go to the Bible to learn how God would have our kids play And even though I said earlier that the

11:13

Bible doesn't have a lot to say specifically about playing He does give us many commands and principles that are applicable to playing

11:20

I plan to focus on more of those points in a future episode But for now number three We need to be ambassador parents who use everything in our children's lives to point them to God Instead of allowing play to be our children's escape from biblical realities.

11:36

We should help them see the Lord in their play Now I can do an entire episode on this point alone, but let me give you just one example

11:43

My children like yours love to create their own fantasy worlds. They have this one imaginary antagonist

11:49

They've created called Gargalon who seems to be the baddest dude in the universe Anyway in the past during their games one of my kids would be the antagonist their bad guys were never really super wicked people, but it was clear that they that represented the bad guy and Sometimes my children would team up and pretend to be the bad guys against imaginary good guys

12:10

I remember pondering this situation for a while before stepping in but eventually I had to say something

12:15

I told my kids that it's not bad to pretend to be a bad guy if at least two things were true a

12:23

The child doesn't sin while doing so It's like portraying Judas or a

12:29

Roman soldier during a passion play. You're not really betraying the Messiah You're not really murdering anyone.

12:34

You're simply representing someone who once did However, if I'm playing a character on stage and I have to take the

12:40

Lord's name in vain or do something sexual on stage Then I Aaron Brewster am actually sinning

12:45

The same goes for the kids My child playing the bad guy shouldn't be hurting the other child or screaming in actual anger or being genuinely unloving and wicked

12:56

So it's not bad necessarily to pretend to be a bad guy if the child doesn't actually sin while doing so And b, the children don't allow the bad guy to win

13:06

It's true that crime does pay for a season It's true that wicked men overwhelm the righteous and evil nations destroy the innocent

13:14

But ultimately sin will not reign and evil will be destroyed Our children can learn an eternally valuable lesson by pretending that Gargalon no matter how persistent and threatening and occasionally victorious he may be will be defeated by righteousness in the end and That leads to c, the good guy is genuinely good.

13:36

I also encourage my kids to allow God to exist in their imaginary universes Now he doesn't have to be the central plot line of the game

13:44

The kids don't have to be in a holy pilgrimage or fighting a holy war all the time But the good guys quote -unquote in the game should at least be assumed to believe in God and submit to his will

13:54

This helps the good guy to be truly a righteous guy. Why is this so important?

13:59

Well way back in episode 14, we discussed kids and movies parenting your kids to success.

14:05

That show grew from an article I had written called the most destructive thing about Hollywood is not what you think.

14:10

I encourage you to listen to that episode But the main point I argued was that One of the most devious elements in our

14:16

TV shows and movies and music is the fact that the good guys are people Who don't acknowledge

14:21

God in anything. These people make friends and overcome cosmic Tyrants and graduate from high school and create a magical unicorn rainbow bridge and bring balance to the universe all without a single consideration to glorifying

14:35

God These stories tacitly lie to our children that God does not exist and that he's not necessary to be successful in life and relationships

14:45

Well, I didn't want my children's pretending to do the same And this is also beneficial because it requires that my children submit to the

14:52

Lord in their play This goes for the imaginary characters they're portraying as well as for themselves

14:58

My kids shouldn't be bossy and controlling and whiny and discontent and unkind when they play together

15:04

Now it hasn't been foolproof and my kids are still very sinful as we all are But one thing that changed was that my kids got less mad at each other

15:12

My son was less tempted to be arrogant and my daughter was less tempted to be sassy

15:18

Their imaginary games were actually quite enjoyable to observe these days because they often try to serve the other while playing

15:25

I'll see my son. He'll be the bad guy He might be gargling or whoever else and he's playing with my daughter and some of her friends and he allows them to catch

15:33

Him and capture him. He allows them to win. That is an act of service on his part. That's also communicating a very biblical truth

15:40

Okay, let's review real quick. Number one. We need to be the parents We shouldn't feel hesitant to parent our children's toys and games any more than we parent their health and education

15:51

Number two, we need to be the ambassador parents we must parent by bringing the truths of Scripture to bear on our children's play and Three we need to be ambassador parents who use everything in our children's lives to point them to God We shouldn't allow our kids play to be an escape from God's reality

16:10

But something that we can use to help root them deeper in it 1st Corinthians 10 31

16:15

So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do and this includes playing games do all to the glory of God.

16:23

I Challenge you to go through your children's toy boxes closets and video game cabinets Check out their board games and listen in on their imaginary escapades

16:32

What is your children's play teaching them? What are their toys preparing them to be and what does

16:39

God want you to teach them through their play? Please share this episode and I'm pretty sure that 100 % of the parents, you know have children who play and God desires that we all submit to his will and next time we're going

16:51

To discuss having forgettable conversations with your kids. I believe it will be a blessing to you in a number of ways

16:58

Our God is so consistent and wonderful and powerful and wise that his truth extends to every facet of our lives

17:05

May we parents point our children to him in all that we do and in all that they do

17:11

To that end. I'll see you next time truth love Parents is part of the evermind ministries family and is dedicated to helping you become an intentional