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Dr. Irwin "Rocky" Freeman
It doesn't matter to me whether the Cowboys win or lose, huh? My joy doesn't depend on that, does yours? To some it does. To some it does. There was weeping in Mudville. Yeah. There may be some more weeping before the year is out.
Yeah, I understand. I understand. Well, I'm glad that you're here. Open your Bible, please, to Genesis chapter 1. And what we want to do is cover some ground and start out tonight sort of foundationally.
And we've got two or three days to spend together. And we're going to go and look at what we believe about living together, husband, wife, children, parents, grandparents, and just most of you have sat through family life seminars.
You've studied the Bible and what it says about the family. And what I want to do is to take you into the Jewish mind, because if you look at the Bible with the Jewish mind, you'll pick up some tidbits of information.
It was written by Jews and is written about a Jew. And the Apostle Paul was a Jew, from which we get most of our doctrine. And so it, I think, would help us if we could understand how Paul was schooled.
What was Paul taught? He was taught by Gamaliel, who was in the ancestral line of the great Rabbi Ahileo. And Gamaliel, one of the great rulers of Israel, who lived back in those days of Jesus, was the man who taught the Apostle Paul.
So we can understand some of the things, because we have writings by these people. We have writings that Gamaliel wrote. We have copies and manuscripts of things that these early people, Jewish people, who lived around the time of Jesus and after the time of Jesus, who strongly influenced the apostles, who strongly influenced Christianity, because the first Christian movement was totally Jewish.
And you know one of the problems was that the Jews wouldn't let Gentiles into the church. They just wouldn't let them in. And that was one of the difficulties. And you know, in Acts 15, when Paul and Barnabas went down to Jerusalem to meet with James and Peter there, and the Holy Spirit indicated to them that Paul and Barnabas would carry the gospel to the Gentiles, and Peter and James and the rest of them would stay with the Jews in Jerusalem, indicating that they were all one.
And so what I'm saying to you is that the Jewish influence upon your life is amazing and tremendous, and yet we just don't understand it sometimes, or we don't recognize it as such. Many of the things you do in marriages, in marriage ceremonies, you can trace it back to the Jewish wedding feast.
You can trace it back to the wedding ceremony at the time of Jesus. And many of the things that influence your life, the radio, television, TV, and all those things, you will find the Jewish influence.
You will find the Jewish hand. You will find the Jewish technology. You will find Jewish mind. And so if you and I can understand some of these principles in the New Testament, the New Testament is essentially in a great portion quoted Old Testament scripture.
And Jesus was constantly sending them back to the Word. And so you and I know that the principles we have to live on, we can find them in the Old or the New Testament. It doesn't matter to us. God's principles are eternal.
They are eternal. And so what we want to do is to share something, not just to be sharing something. I want it to be fruitful for your life. I want it to be beneficial to you. Your time is valuable, and you take time to come, and so you're saying, well, go on and get with it, you know, and let's see, you know, we'll check it out.
We'll vote on it. Now, I never put it to a vote. I never, I just commit time to you, but I don't ever put it to a vote. 613 commandments in the Torah. I'm going to use the word Torah, T-O-R-A-H, meaning, pardon, somebody said it, what?
The law, the law. Basically, the first five books of Moses is called the Torah. The Tanakh is the Old Testament. But generally speaking, Jewish people today, sometimes when they say Torah, they just mean the whole Old Testament.
Or they may say the Tanakh, but it's just easy to say Torah, which means the word of the Lord. So I'm going to use that word. Sometimes I'll mean the law, Moses, the first five books. Sometimes I will mean the Old Testament teachings.
And I'll try to remember to tell you what I mean at that time, because those of you know, you know you have to pass the examination that we will give on Thursday. And so you'll want to make good notes, hopefully.
And, or turn your tape recorder on, or buy the tapes from the church, or something of that nature. But of the 613 commandments inscribed in the Torah, we call them the Mosaic Commandments. The first and foremost commandment in the Jewish mind and in the scripture is what?
Be fruitful and multiply. Ah, different thought. Turn with me to Genesis chapter one, verse 11. Genesis one, verse 11. Now God's creating everything. He's just saying God said and God said nine times.
God said, God said, God said, God said, and the inevitable result is it was so. God said and it was so. God said and it was so. And God is getting everything together. And then in verse 10, he formed the earth.
In verse 10, he called the dry land earth. So we're away from Genesis one, one. Genesis one, one, he created the material and the immaterial. He created the invisible and the visible. In verse 10, he creates the earth.
And then in verse 11, and God said, let the earth bring forth vegetation. Now this is on the third day of creation, isn't it? Say yes, yes. Let the earth bring forth vegetation, the herb yielding seed, the fruit tree yielding fruit after its kind, whose seed is in itself upon the earth.
And it was so. So on the third day of creation, he says, all right, he wants all the herbs and the grass and so forth to bring forth their seed, their fruit. All right, you go to the fifth day of creation in verse 22.
And God blessed him. Now here he's making animal life and he says, and God blessed him saying, be fruitful and multiply and fill the waters and the seas and let fowls multiply in the earth. So that's on the fifth day of creation.
God says, be fruitful and multiply to the animals, the waters, the sea and to fill them and the fowls of the earth. All right, then you go to the sixth day in verse 24. God said, let the earth bring forth the living creature after its kind, cattle and creeping thing and beast of the earth after its kind.
And it was so. So God is just saying, be fruitful and multiply, be fruitful and multiply. Said on the third day, the fifth day, the sixth day. And then finally in verse 26, chapter one, God said, let us make man in our image after our likeness and let them have dominion over the fish of the sea and over the fowl of the air, over the cattle and over all the earth and over every creeping thing that creepeth upon the earth.
Then we go to verse 28 and tie that in with it. And God blessed them. It says, God made male and female and God blessed them and God said unto them, be fruitful and multiply. First thing he said to them, be fruitful and multiply.
So what I'm saying is that man's desire, and I'm saying man, men's desire to procreate comes from a pure source. Man's desire to have children, it comes from a pure source and man's desire to raise children, to have his progeny comes from that source that comes from the hand of God and it causes man to become an associate with a master in creation.
Now you and I, we know those things but we don't think about them in that way. It doesn't lock into our minds when we're having children. We do not think I am in association with almighty God in bringing this life in.
Now we pray and thank God for it and all of that but we look at our children and we don't say, I and God brought you into this world. We just say, you're mine and you're gonna do what I tell you. And that's what we tell them.
But it makes a difference if God's involved in it, you see. Now by giving man this capacity, God planted within man's heart and life, within his creative being, he planted in him the impulse to not only procreate but an amazing thing that happens and I understand this world is all in a turmoil and there's murders and all those things but essentially speaking, man has a spontaneous love to protect and to take care of an infant.
He will hurt adults. He may do many things but a man softens when you hand him a baby. As hard as he is and as egotistical as he might be, when you let, that's why men don't like to hold them. You know what I'm saying?
You'll say, come on, hold him. Oh, I don't, oh, I might drop him. Why, he hasn't dropped anything in his life. You know, he hasn't dropped anything and man has a problem with those little things because he's geared in a different direction but God has given him this desire to procreate and to raise and to love and to protect.
It is placed within the heart of man so that he can raise them to the point that they with God will make their own creative contribution and God's plan would continue on on the planet Earth. So man's creative desire is pure and undefiled in its source.
Man contaminates it. Now, if it is pure and if the desire to procreate is pure and undefiled, then that means it is filled with grace, it is filled with love, and it's filled with compassion. Now, we don't look at men, the ladies don't look at men as a man of grace and love and compassion but beyond that hard exterior, it's sort of like in Israel.
You know, you call a native-born Israeli a Sabra and the word Sabra, it's a little fruit and it's extremely hard and prickly on the outside. It's tough but inside it's sweet and soft and that's kind of the way most men are.
They give you this macho image, you know, but if you can get through it all, if you can get by it, there is a softness, especially when it comes to children, especially when it comes to that child, especially when it comes to that son or that daughter and God gives this desire and nowhere can one see grace, love, compassion involved more in the life of mankind or in the life of humanity than you can see in the relation of an artist to his work, that is with parents and children.
If you want to watch grace, love, and compassion in operation, just sit down and watch. Now, I'm talking about a man or woman who's trying to walk with God. I'm just talking about ordinary people. Somebody who understands that they are operating with God in those children.
It is me and God raising these children, it is not you. It's not your husband, your wife, it's you and God operating there. Then you begin to see grace, love, and compassion moving in their life. Now, you and I can come back and say, well, unfortunately it isn't that way always.
God gave marriage for the purpose of procreation, being fruitful and multiplying the earth, but it was supposed to be multiplied with godly people. It was supposed to be godly personalities flooding the planet earth.
And unfortunately, even though God has done so, you and I know that some marriages go in the opposite direction. You and I know that instead of being a blessing, marriage turns into a bitter curse for many people.
And there are those who sit in the churches that are married and wish to God they weren't. And if they could do it all over again, they would never do it. They would never do it. Some sit and they are miserable.
Now, why is that? One basic reason. It is because that couple has failed to sanctify the marital relationship. By the word sanctify, I mean set their marriage apart unto God to be used of God and not to be consumed on their selfish aspirations.
Because once I start dealing with God in my marriage relationship, it's gonna make all the difference in the world how I react and how I act. And my motives and my goals and my desires, they're all gonna be different.
They're all gonna be different. And we're gonna get in some very practical things if we get by this introductory material on just why you and I act like we do sometimes and how we can solve and resolve some of those things.
And so, you and I know that marriage can be a tremendous blessing, but it can be one of the worst misfortunes. Something that I run into constantly. Your pastor sees it and your staff members as they counsel.
We'll see it time and time again. Time and time again, we say, well, what he needs to do is just get married and it'll solve his problems. No, it won't. My soul, it'll multiply. It'll multiply. Marriage is not a solver of problems.
It is not the solution to one's ills. It is not some game for adolescents. Marriage is for adults, for mature people. And the problem is people race into it and they run into it, but you don't find that in the Jewish home.
You don't find that in the Jewish life. Now, whether or not that marriage, now watch it, whether that marriage is gonna be what God wants it to be depends upon one person. One person, 99, 44, 100 of the time.
I'm not gonna say 100 of the time, although God does. God says that the success of that marriage is gonna depend upon the husband. It depends upon the husband and the husband alone whether that marriage is successful.
If that is true, gentlemen, that means if our marriage is not what it ought to be, if our family isn't what it ought to be, if our relationship with husband, wife, and children, and parents is not what it ought to be, you can trace the problem to the husband, if that is true.
And I find that true in my life as I find it true in most people's lives that I counsel with in that area. If a man's soul is pure, his marriage will be pure. It just will be. There is no alternative to that.
Now, here's what the Jewish people say. A man who is unmarried really possesses nothing at all, though it may not seem so to him. I'm gonna ask you a question. What enjoyment can he derive from the pleasures which must end with his life?
He gains all these things and he dies and he lives. What good is that? He has nothing to continue on. He has nothing to go beyond the time whenever he passes into the other world. And they say they are worthless even in the very moment he possesses them.
The things that he has are worthless to him, although he does not seem to believe such a thing is true. But the good that a married man possesses is really his in the present, however much he may lack temporal goods.
It doesn't make anything, it doesn't make any difference whether a person's rich or poor. If he is married, in Jewish life, he is rich. He is rich if he's married. If he's got a good wife, he's rich. He has everything at the very moment of possession.
Let me give you a statement that is written by the great Jewish sages. He who has no wife dwells without joy, without blessing, without good, without Torah, without the law of God, without protection, and without peace.
Yabba mot 62 in the Talmudic writings. Now, I tried to go back through this with the rabbinical teachings and just see what they were trying to say to me, and here's what they're saying. They say, he dwells, a man who doesn't have a wife, he dwells without joy, for only he whose path in the future is illuminated can have joy.
And a person who dwells without a wife, it plainly says, looks towards a tomorrow that is already dark before he gets there. Now, I've tried to figure that out. What in the world is this guy talking about in all these philosophical terms?
Well, all you gotta do is just think about your life without your wife. You think about what your day would be like tomorrow if your wife was no longer with you. It can be dark. It can be dark. But a man who has a wife, it doesn't make any difference what's coming tomorrow.
He can face it. He can face it if he's got her because she illuminates the future with him. It says without good. Jewish life says that there is no good without consequences. I mean, you say, well, it doesn't mean anything.
It's not worth anything. There is no good without consequences. And he who dwells without a wife cuts himself off from all consequences. It's just saying everything is futile, everything's vanity. It has no value to it whatsoever.
Without Torah, without the law, they say that the essential purpose of the word of God is to serve as an instrument for the building of a new world. That's the purpose of the word of God in the Jewish mind.
It is to build a new world. It is God's instrument in the creation of his world. And God said, and God said, and God said. God's word spoke the creation into existence. And he who dwells without a wife destroys the world in which he lives and destroys the seed that would control the future world.
He does that because he doesn't have a wife. Now you begin to see why Jewish people throughout all the 90 ,000 years have schooled their children to become nuns today. But back then they were schooled for marriage.
There was a time when all families did this regardless of who they were. And then he goes on and says, without protection. Won't even have to comment, you'll see it immediately. A man's best shield against the storms of life and the raging of his senses is his home.
It's not the civic group, it's not the club, it's not the gang, it's not the boys, it's not the bowling, it's not the fishing, it's not the hunting. I gotta get away, I gotta get away for a few days, sweetheart.
I need to go to the woods for about a week. I need to go up in the cabin. Don't call, don't bother. I just need to get away and kind of get myself together. Totally onion to the Bible, that's owed to the Jewish mind.
Where the husband goes, the wife goes. And where the wife goes, the husband goes. You know, I have a saying and you have it yourself. I said, you know, you didn't get married to be a bachelor. People want to spend time away from their wife, want to spend time away from everything.
I'm not talking about a day or half a day. I'm talking about the time they have to go. It says, but he who dwells without a wife is exposed to every wind and every unchecked impulse and he becomes like wind-beaten sheath and he's just tossed about by every breeze of life.
He has nothing to keep him in check. If a man's honest, he'll say that the thing that keeps him in check in his home is his wife. She checks the raging impulses that man has. And that man knows about.
And then it says without peace. For only a man whose field is planted and his produce is blessed. Only a man who plants and has his produce blessed knows inner and outer peace. If you plant, there is no peace until the produce comes.
And if the produce is not blessed of God, there is no peace. Inner and outer peace. He who dwells without a wife sees the abodes of others filled with blessings. Their children like olive saplings circling their tables in joy.
While his own inheritance is unblessed. Therefore, he does not have inner peace. His days are filled with agitation. His days are filled with jealousy. His days are filled with strife. And he can never be at peace with himself or other people.
Look with me, please, to Genesis chapter two. Man was originally created whole, right? Yeah, God made man. God removed a rib, making him incomplete. Part of him was gone. Part of him was missing. And God fashioning Eve from Adam's side, then he commanded them, and they shall be one flesh, meaning they were whole again.
Genesis 221. And the Lord caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam and he slept. He took one of his ribs and closed up the flesh instead thereof. And the rib which the Lord God had taken from man made he a woman and brought her unto the man.
Adam said, this is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh. She shall be called woman because she was taken out of man. Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother and shall cleave unto his wife and they shall be one flesh.
God fashioned Eve from one of Adam's ribs that their cleaving together might not only be a goodly thing, might not only be an act of truth, but that it might be impelled by nature himself. And that is why men search after women.
Call it what you want. They can call it libido. They can call it the sexual urge. You can call it whatever you want, but God has placed within the character of man to cause him to sense an incompleteness without a female.
He is just. No matter, oh, he can go out and be queer and it doesn't make any difference how high he goes, there will always be an infidels and he will spend all of his efforts and all of his money trying to fill up those voids and vacuums that come into his life because he doesn't have that wife.
God has made it so, so that the very nature of man itself cries out for woman because she is a part of him and he always remains incomplete until he has that relationship with his wife in the marital sense when they come together and live together as man and wife.
It is like different branches drawing nourishment from the same source. They become one. Two branches, same source, become one with God. And the cleaving together of man and woman is the very essence of their nature.
We read in verse 23 and 24. You can just stay in those two verses and stay in those two verses and stay in those two verses. And when you have problems with your wife, when you have problems with your husband, just read Genesis 2, 23, and 24 and recognize that God says you will never be complete when you're away from your mate.
There is that which causes it to come about. And it says in Jewish life, he who remains unmarried is denying his own nature and loses the name of a man. He may seem to be a man, he may claim to be a man, but he is not a man.
That's why you find very few Jews who are bachelors. I mean, they don't hang around bachelors long. Oh, you'll find one of them, yep, he's running around loose. But not long, and some little old Jewish girl will grab him because she's out hunting too, you see.
And there are not many of them running around, so their resources are kind of limited. Most of them either live in New York or down here if you find a Jew running around loose, you know, he's just fair game, and so they go at it.
Well, let me talk to you about marriage in the sense the people of Israel do it completely different. Jewish people make marriage a time of feasting and rejoicing. It is a time of feast. It's a time of rejoicing.
It's a time of exulting. It's a time of just exhilarating joy. It's a time of total happiness and complete commitment to what is going on. They believe that marriage is a gift from God. It is not something you decide to do.
You do make a decision, but it is something that God has given as a gift to mankind, and it is not an option. You do not choose whether you will or not. It's just a matter of to whom, because boy and girl, man or woman, must be married according to Jewish life, and in doing so, it bestows joy, six things, joy, blessing, goodness, the law of God or the word of God, security, and peace.
Those things are given to a couple by God, they believe, when they are married, and they are happy in the consciousness that the marriage bond can bring their lives to perfection. Now, when Jews enter into marriage, they rejoice because they believe they have performed the mitzvah of God's command.
They have performed the commandment of their creator. When he said, be fruitful and multiply, they believe when they are married, they are fulfilling God's command for them. It is as much a commandment as to remember the Lord thy God, honor thy father and thy mother, or anything else.
To be fruitful and multiply is a commandment from them, therefore, again, it is not an option. And when Jewish parents have a child, here's what they say. When a child is born, and that Jewish mother and that Jewish dad have that child together, they receive a blessing, may the newborn child enter the portals of Torah, may they enter the portals of the word of God, may they learn the word of God, be committed to the word of God, that's first, and second, marriage, may they get married as quickly as they can, and then may they live a life of good deeds.
May they enter the portals of the word of God, marriage and good deeds. And you will find a religious Jew, you will find him committed to the law of Moses, you will find him married, and faithful in his marriage, and you will also find him struggling to live a life of good deeds.
That's why you find Jews, members of every civic group you can find, they're out involved in everything. They get in this, they get in that. Why? They're trying to do good deeds. I mean, they get in everything.
They get in everything. They join everything in town. You say, well, that's the real business. Now, that's what you think. They are doing it because it is a commandment from God as far as they are concerned, if they are religious.
Now, if they're secular, you don't know what's in their mind, you know, if they're secular, just like you don't know with other people. And so the focus of concern of Jewish people with their children is what?
Not to get them totally educated. Yes, to get them educated. But the primary focus of a Jewish family as far as their children's concerned is to prepare that boy and girl for marriage, to prepare them as best as they possibly can.
And let me share with you, there are hours and hours and hours and hours and hours that are spent by that mom and that dad schooling that boy and that girl on what marriage is, what it's about, and how to give and how to live and how to do it, all these things.
And hours of their life as they grow up is spent towards that one marvelous moment when they will join in what we call holy matrimony. Now, some questions. Why is it necessary to consider marriage an obligation of the word of God?
Why is it necessary to consider it a commandment of the law, so to speak? Why do the Jewish sages, when you go read the great Jewish minds of old, you'll find they're constantly talking about marriage.
I mean, it's like it's almost an obsession with them. Everything they say is related to marriage. And the answer is this, according to rabbinical teaching, it was the specific interest of the law of God to instruct all people in the sanctity of marriage.
It is to teach the bride and groom that they were to view themselves as participants in the creation of a new world. This married couple is going out to create a world of purity, a world of majesty, a world of splendor, a world of blessing, and a world of peace.
Now, how many couples do you know start their marriage out with those thoughts in their mind? The first thing, listen, the only things in their mind is getting away from mom and dad and the church and getting on that honeymoon.
We're gonna talk about honeymoon. Jews don't look at that honeymoon either the same way. It's something we kind of geared ourselves to do. But this couple is supposed to go out understanding they're making a contribution to the world together to make it a better world for God.
Now, I'm not saying that Jews always do this. I'm just saying it's in the law. It's in their teaching. It's in their custom. It's in their history. It's in their heritage. And they're supposed to be doing it.
And so marriage was not an option. And they wanted every Jew and every boy and girl, every bride and groom to be aware of that. Would you turn me please to the book of Proverbs chapter 18? Book of Proverbs chapter 18.
There is a Jewish saying that says this. He who performs a religious obligation and is aware that it is a religious obligation is superior to a person who performs it and is unaware of it. By that he means that a person who does what God says and knows he's doing what God says is superior to a person who would do what God says but didn't know that it was godly principle.
See there are those who teach today that there are lost people who can go about and do the principles of God and get blessings from God. And that violates what I understand the Bible teaches me. God only blesses his obedient children through Jesus Christ.
And so consequently the Jewish mind has already picked up on that. And he says a person is superior if he knows that that principle comes from God and he's doing it because it does come from God, not a person who does it.
And doesn't know where it comes from. Look at Proverbs 18, 22. Here's one of the passages they deal with. Whoso findeth a wife finds a good thing and obtains favor from the Lord. A person who finds a good wife and gets married gets favor from God, he gets blessings from God.
So the opposite of that in the Jewish mind is a person who doesn't get married, he does not only have a good thing, he doesn't have a wife, but he doesn't get blessings from God. There are certain blessings that God holds back from him in his life because he's not done what God wants him to do.
Whoso findeth a wife finds a good thing and obtains favor from the Lord. Now, Jewish tradition says that the groom is the king. Now we men like that, all men like that. Men, as I said, memorize Ephesians 5, 22.
They just love that passage of scripture. A groom is like a king. And it's simply because a wife frees her husband, according to Jewish tradition in marriage, she frees him from the curse of wanting things.
A man who is truly contented with his wife doesn't want things. He is contented with, now that doesn't mean he can't have things, but she is his life. He is wrapped up in his wife. Man is to the woman as Christ is to the church, the New Testament teaches us.
And Jesus Christ gave up every single thing he had. He left heaven and the glory of it to call a servant a stranger, to be spit upon and cursed, had no home he could call his own, had no friends that would stay with him, and his own people rejected him.
He left it all. And man is to the woman as Christ is to the church, totally self-sacrificing. And so they say, therefore, what they're looking at is that when a man has a good wife and he's committed to that wife, things are unimportant to him.
He had rather see her happy. His joy comes from sacrificing for her, but that isn't what I find, that isn't what I see, and I don't think it's what you see. What I see is men spending a tremendous amount of money on things they want and things they like, whether it's, it doesn't make a difference what it is, it can be a boat, bowling ball, it can be anything, and there's nothing wrong with any of those activities, but then I follow up and I say, when was the last time you bought your wife a dozen roses?
When was the last time you went out and bought your wife a dress? I don't know what her size is. When was the last time you went out and bought a pair of shoes? Man, I don't know what size she was. When was the last time you did anything, just cause she wouldn't do it, just for your wife, no birthday, no anniversary, no occasion, nothing, just went out and got her something and said, here, I wanna do this for you.
Now, she's immediately gonna say, you shouldn't have done that, because you see, she's trying to figure out why you did it. It is so out of the ordinary. But if I put it into the biblical perspective, and there isn't anything wrong with having enjoyment in life, but my dear people, a man's job is to spend all that he has to see that his wife is totally contented and happy in everything she does.
That's his primary responsibility to her. It isn't going off and getting all these other things. So I immediately got the women on my side tonight and the men thinking about it, yes, I understand. Like a king, they say, the bridegrooms, every need is met in his wife.
And they say, like a king, he is led to the marriage canopy. You know, in Jewish life, when you get married, you get married under the huva, you know, the canopy. And they get married, and they're led there with rejoicing and dancing and singing and clapping as the groom comes, as if he was a king.
And there's a reason for that, because in the Jewish family, the father is a king. Now watch it, the mother is the queen. And the hour that they are married, that is the hour of their coronation. And that's in the mind of the Jewish man and the Jewish woman.
He's king, she's queen, and the hour of marriage is the hour of their coronation. And from that very hour, their lives are dedicated to the building of a miniature kingdom. And every son that is born is considered a prince.
And every daughter that is born is considered a princess. And their kingdom is the family. Their kingdom is their family. And my dear people, when you see a Jewish home, as wrong as they are about many, many things, and they reject the wonderful Messiah of Israel, the Lord Jesus, and they don't know him, and they're lost because they don't know him.
So when you look at that family, you will find, and I've had people tell me everywhere I go, why do those Jews stick together so much? I mean, man, they're so cliquish. I mean, you can't break through that family while that whole family, they just kind of pass everything about from son, daughter, uncle, he just kind of passes around.
Everything, that's why it's family. Their family is more important to them than anything on this earth. I wish we Christians, now there are Christians who believe that, don't misunderstand me, I said that last evening.
There are many godly Christian people who are far more committed to God than that. But the tragedy is the church isn't filled with people like that. The church isn't filled with people whose family is more important to them than the acclaim of the community or the approval of society.
Who cares what they think about you in the school? As long as you have the approval of your mom and dad, your brother and your sister, and you know you're right with each other. Who cares what they think on the job as long as you're right in your family and your family's together and you're growing?
Who would dare take sides against their family? But it happens day after day after day after day. It happens. Jeremiah chapter 29. Jeremiah chapter 29 verse six. It simply says this. Take to yourselves wives and beget sons and daughters and take wives for your sons and give your daughters to husbands that they may bear sons and daughters that you may be increased there and not be diminished.
He says, be fruitful and multiply. This is one of them, they go in there and jerk out of Jeremiah and they say, there it is, boy, you're supposed to get your children married and they're supposed to get theirs married and just keep on multiplying and fill the earth.
But again, it should have been with godly people. It should have been with people who would follow the teachings of God. And you know, there's an interesting factor that I found out that I never paid much attention to.
Jewish people believe that there is an atonement factor, not total atonement, but there's an atonement factor in marriage. There's something about atonement that begins to react our work in marriage because you see, when a young Jewish couple, and I'm talking about a religious Jewish couple, young people, do you know what they do when they get married?
The day they marry, they fast. Total fasting, nothing to drink, nothing to eat. All day long, they fast. Can you imagine an 18-year-old boy and a 17-year-old girl or a 20-year-old boy and a 19-year-old girl fasting?
No, you can't keep our kids out of McDonald's long enough to get them to fast. Man, they'd come down to the wedding with some french fries if they could, you know, or some McNuggets. They'd come all the way down the aisle if you'd let them.
I know, dad, he'd be sitting there with something stronger. But you know, they recognize that they are coming in penitence for the waywardness of their youthful days and they're about ready to set out on a new, new thing.
They're about ready to set out on a new way of life. And so they fast all that day. And with marriage, they believe that they erase all the former guilt of the waywardness of their youth when they make that commitment one to another.
Previously, they recognize and they are taught, you are half a person. You are not complete until you have a wife. You are not complete until you have a husband because you have part of man in you and God wants you to come together and to be one.
And they know Genesis chapter one, they cleave together and become one. So they're taught that you'll never be complete until you come together as one. You will always lack peace. You will always lack goodness in your life.
And so they are urged. And with the hour of marriage, they know that they resume that original holiness and again, they become one flesh and they open their hearts to peace and goodness and to move out and try to develop their family according to the things of God.
It is interesting to me that Jewish young couples, when they are married in a religious family, before they come together for marriage, they pray together for forgiveness of their sins, of their youthfulness.
They pray for forgiveness of the sins that they have done as a young person and they ask for atonement for their wasted past before they get married. Now that's before the day of marriage that they do that.
They don't do it on the day of marriage, they do that before the day of marriage. And they recognize that their previous reckoning is now done away with. The way they directed their lives, the way they honed in on what's out in front of them, they no longer look at it in that that is going to be changed with them.
Their life's destiny is now set. As husband and wife, they must now be fruitful and multiply and they must walk in the word of God, they must build their marriage and they must do good deeds together as husband and wife.
And that's why, again, you go into the communities where there are significant Jewish populations and you will find husband and wife, they are involved in everything going on in town. They just do what?
Because they're working. They don't understand grace, but they're working and they are doing it diligently. And that young boy and girl say this prayer, open thou a new gate for us as the old gate is now closed.
Open up a new gate of life for me. And then there are two benedictions that are recited. One is for joy and the other is for betrothal. One is commitment and the other is for joy and that benediction of joy and betrothal expresses praise, it expresses thanksgiving and expresses a thanksgiving to God who puts holiness into the Jewish life.
So that young couple look at their marriage as a oneness coming together, but they look at it as a life that is about to embark on holiness. It's interesting that you find that in Jewish life, holiness.
Now, how many couples do you know? How many couples do I know that I've even married that they set out believing they were embarking on a life together in God in holiness? Well, we don't even do that as mature adults.
After we even understand it, we have difficulty sometimes with it. The groom then places the ring on the finger and as he places on that bride's finger, he says this, behold thou art consecrated to me with this ring in accordance with the law of Moses and Israel, which is to say, as the law of Moses and Israel is of divine origin and it bears the seal of truth, so shall our marriage be consecrated by divine holiness and truth.
That'd be a marvelous prayer for anybody to pray, regardless of who they are. Divine holiness is the mark of our marriage. Let me ask you a question. Is the mark of your marriage divine holiness? Where is holiness in your marriage?
Young marriage or old marriage? Doesn't make any difference. Is it divine holiness? That is something we've kind of forgotten about in Christianity in so many ways. Well, we say that nothing that is consecrated to God can be profaned.
If it's consecrated to God, it can never be profaned. If it is profaned, then it comes under the wrath and the curse of God. So from that moment on, the basic rule, and in Jewish life, it is called the rule of holiness.
The rule of holiness, the rule of holiness guides the life of that boy and girl. If not, then God's presence does not dwell with them. And so in the law and the prophets, there is a word that is used that is called betrothal.
It is erusin, E-R-U-S-I-N. E-R-U-S-I-N, and it means basically betrothal. And it's used to designate the act of kodeshin, K-I-D-U-S-H-I-N. And it's that act of betrothal. It's the consecration of a marriage.
And it's identically the same word that is used in the Old Testament when it talks about the covenant between God and Israel, between the covenant that God made with the people of Israel. And God said, I will be your God.
I will dwell in the midst of you, and I will bless you. I didn't choose you because you were many, but you were small than all the rest. And yet I've chosen you. And they become the apple of his eye. And it's a covenant that cannot be broken.
In Jeremiah, it talks about it. In Psalms, it talks about it. And God said, if you can change the moon, change the stars, and do all these things, then you can break my covenant that I made with David.
And so it is a covenant, and it's used between God and Israel. And so the Jewish people use that in their marriage. And that's why, again, oh, I know that there are exceptions to every rule, but that's why you'll find divorce extremely low, extremely low.
Now, things are changing very rapidly in Jewish life because 40 of all Jewish marriages today are intermarriages. And that's why the rabbis are all up in arms about all this. Jews are marrying non-Jews.
I mean, you know, they're marrying this, that, whatever. And so there's a great concern about that. But their description of this marriage betrothal or this consecration of their marriage in describing it in the same terms of the great covenant between God and Israel is extremely significant and can help us understand.
Will you turn me to the book of Hosea? The book of Hosea. It's been preached on and taught. It's such a marvelous book. And the book of Hosea is a book that talks about the marriage experience. And it is Israel's betrothal to God.
God's covenant with Israel. In the sense, and we make symbolism of marriage and an analogy of the marriage situation. And it uses this throughout the book of Hosea. And the prophet Hosea makes erosin, it makes betrothal to be based upon seven conditions.
In this book, there are seven conditions. Six of these conditions apply to God and only one applies to Israel. There are six conditions about God and his relationship in this covenant with Israel. And only one applied to Israel.
Look at chapter two and I'll show them to you. In chapter two, verse 19, the very first part, and I will erosin thee unto me forever. I will betroth thee to me forever. So that's just what God said, just like God did that.
All right, again, in verse 19, I will erosin, I will betroth thee unto me in righteousness. I'll do it forever and I will do it in righteousness and in justice. And then in verse 19, the third part of the verse, and in loving kindness, I will betroth thee in loving kindness and in mercy, in compassion, it means.
And then in verse 20, I will even erosin, I will even betroth thee unto me in faithfulness. Now, look what Israel's supposed to do, just one thing, and thou shalt know the Lord. God says six things I'm gonna do, one thing I want you to do, know the Lord.
Now, you and I know that word know just doesn't mean knowing about him. Know him, know God, know the Lord intimately, know him personally, know him daily, know him in your experience of life, know him in everything that involves your life.
Know all of these things. Now, those same seven conditions, Jewish people have based it upon the same covenant that God had with Israel, you will find seven conditions apply in the betrothal of a husband and wife.
Six of them are the husband's responsibility and one of them is the wife. Six is the husband, one is the wife. Go back to verse 19, I will betroth thee unto me forever. Jewish law says a husband cannot and must not and may not while consecrating the wife in marriage ever entertain the idea of divorce.
One of the great tragedies today is our young people and even me of college and career and adults believe that they can go into marriage and if it doesn't work, I can get a divorce and I'll start over again.
And God never meant that it be so. God never desired that it be so and the danger that lurks in that kind of thinking, that kind of thinking and so that's one thing for the husband, he cannot, he cannot because usually he is the guilty party in doing so.
And then it says in righteousness, a husband must not and may not and cannot ever bring up false charges against his wife to justify his desire to break the marriage bond or to do anything that he desires in his heart.
Again, I could list you all kinds of incidents where husbands have conjured up lies, stories, rumors, fairy tales and myths about their wives. Yeah, in the church, so-called Christian people, yeah, even some call themselves Baptists who would conjure up charges against their wives to justify the life that they were living.
Well, the reason I do what I do is because she's this way or she's that and then when you go talk to them, you find many times the opposite, they're the opposite. And then he says in justice, Jewish law says that even if a wife wrongs her husband, the husband cannot treat her unjustly.
He cannot, no matter what she does, he cannot do so. And then in loving kindness, the husband must always act compassionately toward his wife, he can never act rigorously toward his wife, everything he says or does to his wife, according to Jewish law, must be done with compassion, mercy, concern and care.
Well, we believe that, of course, more so even as Christian people, but again, how many husbands, even who are Christians, I mean, you know, just all of a sudden without even realizing it, the wife says the wrong thing and all of a sudden here he is blaring like a trumpet, you know, screaming, hollering, yelling as if she can't hear him, she's standing right there in front of him, you know.
Speaking softly one to another, one with whom we've committed our lives to, there is never a need for a husband to raise his voice to his wife, never a need for a husband to raise his voice to his children, you can communicate the same thing by speaking softly, the same thing can be done.
We don't do it in civic groups, we don't do it out in public, we don't do it at all these other, no, we don't. We only do it in our home and we're gonna talk about that as a reason why it happens in the home and then in faithfulness.
Now, Jewish people look at this on a very practical level and they say that the husband does not dare to simulate affection for his wife when he thinks his heart belongs to another, he has to tell her.
He can't come in acting like he's in love with his wife and acting like he cares about her when he's thinking about somebody else. According to Jewish law, if that's in his heart, he must confess it to her.
Well, that's what my New Testament tells me, that's what my New Testament tells me. But how many men would dare such a thing? How many men have that kind of freedom with their wife? And man, brother, I'll tell you what, Rocky, you go tell my old lady that, brother, I'm gonna tell you right now what happened to your brother.
I mean, she'd be up on your head like, man, I'll tell you what, you don't know her. Man, she's got that temper, I mean, boy, listen. I know, that's one good rationalization, there are probably some others.
But would to God that husbands and wives would have that kind of freedom where they are not threatened, they are not challenged, where they have the freedom to share whatever's in their mind, whatever's in their heart with one another without any worry whatsoever.
That's the way it's supposed to be, but it isn't that way in most marriages that I meet, even good sweet couples who really love the Lord, it isn't that way. Why? We're fearful, we're afraid of each other.
We're afraid of each other. We're afraid to be hurt. We're afraid to be rejected. We're afraid someone is not going to like us, someone is not going to love us, or someone will see a weakness. Well, those are the things that a husband does, the wife, for her part, assumes one stipulation.
And if she heeds the stipulation, it renders her consecration of the marriage to be in truth and her betrothal to this husband to be free of all deceit. All she has to do is, and thou shall know the Lord.
Now, that intrigued me. I said, the Lord, as I began thinking about this, why in the world would you put all those stipulations that's true on the man and the wife? All she got to do is know the Lord.
I mean, it doesn't seem like it's much for her to do. I mean, you know, we men, we get all the burden, you know? You got to lay it all on us. I mean, you know what's going on? I was trying to find some way out for us, brother, but I was having a hard time.
And of course, I knew that I would be speaking to you and it wouldn't mess with me, you know? I mean, it had nothing to do with me. I'm the speaker. So I'd be free from all this stuff, you know? So that kind of let me off the hook.
But you know, then I began to read what some of the great rabbis and the great Jewish sages of old, and here's what they were saying to me. A wife has no need of the admonitions addressed to her husband because the traits, and I had to say, God, that's right, that's right, that's right, the traits of compassion and mercy and righteousness are more deeply rooted in the being of a woman than they are a man.
The roots of compassion and righteousness and mercy run deeper in a woman than they do a man. Be she young or old, they just do. And I said, Lord, I understand that. Now, there is a respect that a woman does need admonition.
A woman can never reverence her husband more than she reverences her Lord. She can never make her husband her God. He does not become your Lord. The tragedy in church and in church life, so many women love their husbands more than they love Jesus, and I believe you ought to love him with all your heart.
But you only give 100 allegiance to God. He alone gets 100%. You can give your husband 99, 44, 100, but you gotta love God more than you love him. And that's exactly what Jesus said. He that loves father and mother more than me is not worthy of me.
He who loves his son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me. Think not that I have come to bring peace. He said, I come not to bring peace but a sword. I've come to set a man at variance with his house.
The love, we have to get a balance and perspective here, and I have to find out how I discern, how can I love God and still love my wife? How can I love God and still love my husband? I mean, how can I do this because I love my family with all my heart?
How can I love him with all my heart? But there is a way that it can be done. There is a way that it can be done. And so, compassion and righteousness are deeply rooted in the woman. The man is basically sensual.
The man basically runs on his senses. The man basically runs on his rationale. The man basically runs on his sensual nature. And when his senses are aroused, he is capable of overturning all the foundations of a home.
It's purity, it's sanctity. He is capable in a moment's time of destroying it all. Well, you won't find that in the case of a woman. A man can destroy a home quicker than a woman, although she can destroy it.
But a man can do it in a moment of time, in a moment of time. At such moments, the amazing thing to me is that a wife is perfectly capable of restraining her husband's raging senses. And she does it in any number of ways.
By her sweet, godly spirit, by her compassionate heart, by that reaching out to him, by that encouragement she gives to him, she calms the raging of those senses that are so strong in all of we men, all of we men.
The bride and groom fast on the day of wedding, fast. I thought back to that, man, when I got married, I married a Gentile, God wanted to bless her, but, you know, I didn't fast. Man, I figured I was gonna get married, I probably wouldn't have enough money to buy any more food, so I sucked up everything I could get.
Man, I mean, I put a feast on before that wedding. Of course, I was wondering where I'd be there in the first place or not, you know, and you'd have all those doubts and wonders, you know. A lot of people tell me they walked down that aisle, I had perfect confidence.
Brother, man, I said, God, is this it, Lord? I mean, you know, maybe I can do something, you know, but once you get down there and the pastor there, you know, he's God, you know, I got saved under him, you know, you can't run off and leave him.
Of course, then I didn't know enough, you know, I figured, man, I might lose my salvation, but then I didn't know. But, you know, had all these thoughts in my mind, you know. But I hear people tell me, they say, brother, I didn't have any problems with it, and yet everybody I've married, I see a guy standing like this.
And here she comes, you know, she's trying to be gracious, and her dad walking on the side of him, you sure you won't do this, sweetheart? You sure he's the guy? You sure he's the guy? And all those things, but we're all confident, and we thank God for what he's done.
But, you know, to believe that we approach marriage solidly and earnestly, seriously, with solemnity and commitment and sanctity, and that a young couple should dedicate that day to prayer to God, and that his divine presence might rest upon their marriage, to start it out together in prayer before God.
God bless the ceremony tomorrow. God bless. We got something, man, you can't see the bride on the day of the wedding. You know, where else said you came? You've been seeing her for five, 10 years. What difference does it make, well, it's bad luck.
Listen, you've about already had all the bad luck you're gonna get, you know. You've about already had it. That's about it. Well, let's take a few minutes. Pastor, tell us what you'd like for us to do, and then I want to share something with where joy dwells in the home.
Where the joy dwells. Pastor, if you'll direct us. Regardless of what kind of a home a person lives in, but specifically speaking about the man, because the husband has tremendous responsibilities, even though he lives in the most palatial of residences, Jewish life believes he will never have founded a home until he takes a wife.
You've heard it said that a man's house is where he hangs his hat. A man's home is where he hangs his hat. But in Jewish life, a man's wife is his home. Wherever his wife is, that's where his home is.
And he's committed to that particular fact. And a man can succeed on the outside, but true satisfaction and rest within himself awaits for him only at home. You and I know that men and women differ in nature, but I think sometimes we men forget that we differ also in understanding and discernment and insight.
Man gets his understanding from a different place than a woman gets her understanding. Man acquires understanding basically through social intercourse, just moving about the community, going about on his job.
That's where he gains basically his understanding. Men gather theirs in that way. Men who restrict themselves to the confines of their home or their house and who do not venture out, you will find those people with very little understanding.
There are those professions and there are those careers that are certainly not unworthy that are available in our society where a man stays essentially near his home. He stays essentially near the confines of his house and he does his job there and he ventures out very little.
And when you confront those people, share with those people, meet with those people, visit in their homes, you will find their understanding of the things going on in life are very strange. And you'll find that there's a lack of their understanding.
A woman is different. A woman finds her insight basically within herself. God has just placed it within her. We try to say, well, women have this intuition. I mean, they just know something. You know, they just know.
Well, you can't tell my wife that, brother, because I tell you, she'll know the moment I say it. She's gonna know the truth. That's why I figured out my mother used to say, look me in the eye, and I said, shoot, she can't tell nothing, man.
I'd look her in the eye and lie like a dog. Look up there and just lie. You know that? I said, how in the world she'd know? But she knew every time. She knew every time. You know, I've talked to mothers that have shared with me, and you've heard things.
I've heard mothers tell me stories, and I don't put a lot of faith in dreams and all that stuff, but you know, I've had mothers say, you know, I just felt in my heart something was wrong with my son. Something was wrong with my child.
And I ran out of the house, and sure enough, there was a peril, there was a danger, there was a hazard there. Child was about to go out in the street or something there, and she just felt it within her heart.
And women seems to have those innate insights that God has placed within them. You and I know that wisdom comes from God. Most men make the mistake that I've made for over 20-something years of ministry, believing, and I've said this to you before, but I repeat myself purposely, is that we believe that because we gather some facts that that's wisdom.
That because we're a man, and we're a husband, and we're a father, we're the head of the home, automatically we have wisdom, and therefore any decision we make ought to be adhered to regardless. But it's very difficult to learn that wisdom is not the gathering of facts and data and information.
A person can quote an encyclopedia and have no wisdom. Wisdom comes from God. God alone gives wisdom. And yet sometimes it's extremely difficult for us to grab hold of that. Insight comes from one's self.
Wisdom comes from God. Insight comes from one's own being. And in the depth of insight, in that which is discernment, rabbis of old have always considered the woman superior to the man. They consider the woman superior in insight, a woman superior to man in discernment, a woman superior to a man in basic intuition in the things of life.
Woman has always been considered superior by the rabbis and by the Jewish sages in Jewish life. And they say something like this. A home is most unfortunate where a husband will continually draw his wife into the vortex of his outside business, into his own agitated life outside the home.
For life's raging currents will then through that couple invade that home and there will be no escaping the strife of the outside world. Indicating that we're possible. And I understand that in our economy, somebody, you know, sometimes the women work in the same business that their husband has and things like that.
But even if that's the case and even if both are committed Christians, I will guarantee you there are difficulties that will arise that arise nowhere else. My wife works in my office. And we did it because we believed that God would honor him.
And she has been a tremendous help in managing that office. And she quit a very good job, a well-paying job in the medical profession to come into there. And I talked to a couple that I trust and value their counsel.
And as we shared with them, they said to us, they said, listen, you don't know the problems you've had until you began working together. You see each other all day, you see each other all night. I mean, you eat breakfast together, you eat lunch together, you eat supper together, you work together, you give orders, you take orders.
And when you start telling a secretary, this is what I want done, that's no problem. But when you get secretaries, your wife. But my office manager is my wife. And I said to her one day, I said, you know, you think you run this office.
But let me tell you something. She says, no, I don't believe that. She said, all I'm doing is suggesting to you that this is a better way of doing it than that. And it'll save us a lot of time, it'll save money and things like that.
And I said, well, as long as you know who runs the show, you can go ahead and do it that way, you know. Long as you understand, you know, you may know what I'm talking about, you know. But you know, I never realized the tensions that will arise.
And all of those things, and although it has been a tremendous blessing in so many ways, but the Jewish Sages says, that is not the way to go. And the husband and wife are fortunate when they recognize that neither is suited to perform the other's functions.
The other's functions. As I mentioned last night, you give a man the job to do during a day's time that a woman does, and he will collapse. He'll go nuts. He'll go bananas. He'll never make it through the day if he has to do what she does.
I've asked a man one time, yeah, I have a little thing that I do with couples on the five secrets to a happy married life that we do sometime in fellowships and Sunday school meetings and things like that.
And one of the things I said, how many of you men know how to turn the washing dryer on? Would you raise your hand? And this amazing guy said, here we go. They just kind of laugh and hit the light, you know, like that.
Yeah, go ahead, raise your hand if you know. He doesn't know. You don't know how to turn that thing on. And they give me this thing, well, I don't go back there because my wife doesn't want me to go back there.
I say, you know why your wife don't want you to go back there is because she knows you don't want to go back there. Could you make a souffle? Are you talking about that thing they call like a mouse? No, that's a moose.
Most men don't know how to turn an oven on. Radar range, they like that because it makes that little noise. Beep, beep, beep, beep. So they learned that one pretty good. You know, they like to hear you go beep, beep.
Mopping. She said, would you mop the utility room there for me while I get ready to get everything else? Where's the mop? It's in the mop locker on the M. It's out back, you know. Well, what do you use on this?
Clorox? No, don't use Clorox on there. What's this? Handy dandy and stuff? No, he doesn't know. It's a world that he has no knowledge of whatsoever. Jewish life says that one understands that you can help one another, but if one understands that they cannot perform the other's functions and that the separate endeavors enjoyed by their different natures when they come together produces a beautiful harvest in that life if they recognize that and that the home is the only place where that harvest can be reaped.
It cannot be reaped anywhere else. It cannot be reaped in your office. It cannot be reaped in the place of business. It cannot be reaped anywhere except within that home. And I was thinking, as I thought about marriage, and I was thinking about honeymoons because I've had some couples ask me, and I had a sweet, sweet family, bless their hearts, just such a godly family, and I've known them through the years.
They lived in Albuquerque, and I met them many years ago. They've had a daughter, and we've just become the best of friends, and I've watched her grow up into a beautiful young lady that loves the Lord, and so she decided she was gonna get married, and so I told her one time, I said, you know, before you ever marry a guy, I want you to come talk to me about it.
Would you make sure you check in with me before you ever marry some dude. I just want to put a wall around her, you know, to make sure I protect her as best I could. She has a godly mom and dad, and so they called here not too long ago and wanted to know if I could marry her, and I said, well, where are they gonna get married?
She's getting married in New Mexico, and I said, well, who is the guy? And this guy works where she works. He is the manager of a funeral home, a mortuary. And I said, well, are they gonna get married in the church out there?
And he said, no, they're gonna get married in the mortuary chapel. I said, now, that'd be a first for me. That would be strange. And I said, you know, I'd love to do it, but I gotta be at Parkside Baptist Church, and I just can't do it.
So it was this Sunday that I was supposed to, that they would want me to. Well, I said, Lord, thanks for the schedule, and you know, as much as I love her, you know, that'd be kind of weird, but you know.
And that thing about, I'd ask them, you know, where are you gonna go? You know what Jewish life says about a honeymoon? The practice of traveling for a month of honeymoon is not praiseworthy from God.
Travel at its most pleasant is a tiring and unsettling affair and diminishes the bride and groom's real happiness. Now, when I read that, I just began to call some people that just recently got married that I knew.
And I said, how long did you go? And some said a week, two weeks. Some said three weeks. I only found one or two that were able to stay away a month. You know, and they were rolling it in. So most of them were just glad to get away for a few days.
And I said, well, tell me what you did. And they told me, and I said, did you have any problems? Oh, yeah, man, he didn't want to go here, and I wanted to go there. And I went back and looked at my own honeymoon.
I thought, my, so I spent most of my time quibbling and arguing about where I was gonna go and what I was gonna do during the day. Here's what Jewish life says. Perhaps some people say the point of the honeymoon is to distract the couple from a very difficult period of transition until the adjustment is made.
Now, every marriage counselor that I've been able to read who would comment on the purpose of a honeymoon, that's what they said. It's to allow them to adjust to that period from the distractions that will arise around them.
Now, I went back and found what some of the wise men of old, they said, they said, we find holiness and sublimity in marriage and have no need of distraction. And I thought, well, go back to that rule of wholeness.
Why am I getting married anyway? A couple can do no better than to rejoice in their own home in rest, quiet, tranquility, and in genuine happiness with one another. Now, I tried to figure out why people don't stay at home and just have some time off and get to know one another.
It's because the in-laws won't let them alone. Is he treating you all right, sweetheart? Now, you know you can come home to mother any time. If that boy says anything to you, sweetheart, all the way, you're just letting me know.
That's why they go off, to get away from mom and dad. Always say it's to get away from all the guys. No, they don't care like that, uh-uh. But I'm convinced there's a truth in that. Rather than expending the money that is so hard to come by and spend all that time and energy in going off somewhere, and I'll promise you, most of the time is spent sightseeing.
It's not getting along with one another. It's not talking about who you are. It's not making an adjustment about anything. It's just going out sightseeing during the day and going to bed at night, that's it.
I said, my soul, you don't have to be a Philadelphia lawyer to think about the money you could save. I'd do that at home. Go to the zoo during the day and then come back home at night. I'm not saying don't go, I'm just saying I would like to know the real value of it.
Because I believe it sets us out believing, psychologically, that we have to have distractions. We have to get away from that. We've got to get away from this in order to get to know one another so that when we come back to that, we're already geared in our minds, we can't really get to know one another in this environment.
Whether we recognize it or not, subconsciously, that barrier has been put there. And that's why people say, I got to get away. I got to get away from this. Well, I'm not talking about vacations and things like that.
I know a lot of couples that vacation from each other. They say, where are you going on vacation? This one says, I'm going up here. I say, what do you mean, I'm going up here? Oh yeah, he's going down there.
I say, you mean you're going on vacation, you're not going together? No, I say, here, let me give you my card. You're gonna need it. You're gonna need me soon. Well, why is it that way? Why would Jewish people make such a statement that's so strong and goes contrary sometimes to the things that I might hold dear?
It's because they believe that God dwells in the midst of the marriage. That God dwells in the midst of the marriage. And here's what they say. If a husband and wife are deserving, God's presence dwells in their midst.
If not deserving, fire devours them. And I try to figure out, now, where in the world would they get something like that? That God dwells in their midst if they're deserving, but if they don't, fire devours them.
And then I ran across this. The Hebrew word for man is ish, English, I-S-H. Now, if you spell that out in the Hebrew, it is aleph, yod, shin. Aleph, yod, shin. Now, if I take that yod out, I have aleph, shin, esh, E-S-H, which means fire.
Now, the woman in the Hebrew is ish-ah. It's aleph, shin, hey. If I take that hey off, I've got esh again. I've got fire in the very name of man and woman in the Hebrew. Now, I went back and found out what someone else had to say about that.
And it says, we learned from this that there is a consuming fire in the heart of every man and woman, and when they marry, two fires are brought together that are capable of destroying the entire world if they are not properly tended.
You remember what God said to Lucifer? Because a fire was found within him, the fire of passion and pride coupled together, uncontrolled, changed Lucifer from the great shining angel to Satan, the adversary of God and man.
And it caused the angel to be changed to demons, and it has been the source of all the sin and sickness and all the wars and all the crime and all that which is evil came because of a fire coming from within God's creation, and man and woman has that same fire.
Now, it is impossible to put it out. It cannot be put out. There's no way that it can be done because it generates a life in the world. But to leave it as it is is impossible because it generates evil as well.
So what did God do about it? You already know. He placed one of the letters. You know, in Jewish life, there's what is called the sacred tetragrammaton. From the word Jehovah, we say Y-H-V-H, four letters.
Some people say Y-H-W-H. Y-H-V-H, the sacred tetragrammaton, the four letters. Someone came along and said, okay, J, and we'll put a E in there, and we'll make that, you know, a H, and then we'll put a O, and then we'll put a V, and we'll put a A.
There are no vowels in the Hebrew language. They're all consonants. They have vowel markings, but they're all consonants. And originally, they were all consonants. Somebody came along. Now, Jews believe, the ancient Jewish sages, that no one knows the true name of God.
That's why when you see God written, it'll say G-D. It'll never spell his name out. If it's a really religious Jew, he'll say G-D. Because Jews believe that Aaron once knew the name of God, and he whispered it in the Holy of Holies on Yom Kippur once a year.
But because the people rebelled against God and continued to be sinful, and sin began to progress in their activities, and they began to intermarry, and they did all the things that God told them not to do, that they were afraid to mention God, and whenever the dispersions came, and the captivities came, and then the destruction of this, and the destruction of that, that they forgot and lost the name of God so that no one knows.
And many conservative Bible scholars believe that the name Jehovah is a convenience for us. It's the best we got, and there certainly isn't anything wrong with doing that, but we cannot say for sure that that's exactly what it means.
So Jews call it the sacred tetragamaton, the sacred four letters, J-H-V-H. So here's what they did. They said God placed one of the letters of the divine name, so the first one is Y, Yod, Yod. So he placed the name Yod between the Aleph and the Shin to make the Hebrew word for man, Aleph, Yod, Shin.
He took the second letter of his name, H, He, and he took that and put that into the woman, and he added that after Aleph and Shin, he put the He. So God put his presence by a letter of his name in the name for man and in the name for woman.
So in that way, both man and woman retain their name and retain in their names the word fire. But when they marry, because the divine presence dwells in their midst, in the combination of their names, that fire gives warmth and it gives heat to the life.
If God's presence does not dwell there, that fire is a consuming fire and it turns their home into a literal hell on earth. And if a husband and wife, and many do, make God's presence unwelcome in their home, I love to see those little signs when I go into a home and it says the Lord is the unseen guest in this home.
Others say the Lord is the head of this home, and all those, but you know, when you begin to observe that home, sometimes you wonder why they have that there. Is it just there or is it really true? Is he really and truly Lord of the home?
Well, why is this in the Jewish mind? Because every Jewish home, remember I said it'd be a miniature kingdom, but there's another concept that every Jewish home is to be a sanctuary, it's to be a place of worship.
That is why, see, in the church, we have all of our activities in the church in Christianity, but in Jesus' day, they didn't. In Jesus' day, Jesus himself observed the feast. Some of them were at the temple, but also in the home, in the home, because they were done in Jesus' day in the home.
Many of the activities went on in the home, and many of those things, the holidays were celebrated in the home. And so consequently, every home was intended and is intended in Jewish life to be a sanctuary in the small, a miniature sanctuary.
And we say that in ourselves. We preach it, we teach it, we share it with one another, that the man is the priest of the home, and the home ought to be a little heaven on earth, and the home ought to be a worshipful place, it ought to be a place consecrated completely to God.
And that's what a sanctuary basically is. It's where people meet with God, and where God's presence dwells, and the functions that take place in it in Jewish life are considered as sacred altar services.
It is mandatory as a sacred altar service. It's just as the priest would minister before God in the tabernacle or in the temple. And the father is the priest of that home. And there are basically six things that go on in the Jewish home that he must do.
There are many other things, but basically they fall under these categories. First of all, they are considered offerings unto God. They are considered offerings unto God, and here are the offerings he does.
They must control the fire in the heart of the husband and the wife. When you go into most Jewish homes, you will not hear screaming. If it's a religious home, you will not hear screaming, and you will not hear that father raising his voice at his wife or his child if it's a religiously observant home.
He will speak firmly, and he will speak strongly, but he will not speak loudly. And I can remember my dad, who was not a believer in Jesus, I tried to go back and think about the times my dad scolded me, the times that my dad had to chase me and sometimes even scourge me, and the things that he had to do with me in my life, but I cannot ever remember my dad raising his voice to me.
I can't ever remember my dad raising his voice to my mom. I can never remember my dad raising his voice to my brother or my sister. I can never remember my mother doing it, and yet I can remember both of them whipping me till I thought I was gonna die.
I mean, you know, my daddy gave you time. He didn't give you licks. I know other people say, you're gonna get 10 licks. My dad gave me time. He'd say, you get four minutes, or you get five minutes, and you know, my mother said, oh, please don't hurt him, don't hurt him, you know, because she knew what was coming, so we had to go up to the bedroom, and we closed the door, went inside, and my dad took his belt off.
He didn't have a neutral object. He just took his belt off, and I mean, that thing had those little holes in it, and he'd wrap it around his hand. He said, okay, time begins now, and I can do anything I want to in that room to keep away from him.
He'd give me time. I'd get four minutes, five minutes, whatever it was. Sometimes I was in there 15 minutes, and you know, he didn't even have to hit me. I'd scream. He just swung. You know, ah, you know, and I'd just jump away, you know, and I'd go under the bed, and he'd come underneath there after me, popping that, and he got where he was good at that thing.
You know, I mean, he could pop that thing almost like a whip, that big old long belt. I believe he just had it made purposely for me. It couldn't have fit him, but I never remember my dad raising his voice at me, even when he chastened me, even when he had to correct me.
I never remember him raising his voice to me, and I found it to be true in religiously observant Jewish homes, and so I think, you know, we do the same. Then another offering to God is to avoid quarrels, to avoid arguments.
It is considered an offering to God to lessen the arguments in a home, not to have arguments one with another. Well, it's kind of difficult to argue when you believe the dad's the king. If you believe the mother's the queen, I mean, you know, you just have some good discussions, but arguing?
Shouldn't be. Mutual loving kindness and support. Support one another. I hear this all the time. I was in Florida some time ago, and I was talking to a person that's, I talked to him. I don't have a lot of confidence in him, but, you know, he's one of these macho, egotistical young men.
He's in a career, and he's married, and claims to be a Christian, but there's so much in his life that isn't Christian, and cannot give me a good salvation testimony, and all of this, and many things, and we were talking about it, and he said, you know, he was talking about Jewish people, and he always brings it up with me, so we were sitting there in his home, so I'd listen to him, and he gives me all this stuff about Jews, and, well, how come you guys always stick together?
He said, you know, nobody can get in there, you know? You don't care about getting in your family. He said, one doesn't, one line doesn't square to it, and all this stuff. I said, support. If you don't support your family, who will?
If you don't stand for your family, who is? I can't depend on other people supporting my family. We gotta support ourselves, and we are taught very early. I can remember when I was four and five years of age, I was taught, as a young Jewish boy, if you don't stay close, and if you don't excel, if you don't succeed, and if you don't support, if you don't stay close to your family, and if we don't build this family up, they'll trample us to death.
They'll slaughter us. They'll trample right over us. We have to stay together, and that's why the community stays together, and that's why when you go to a Jewish people, they all function together. Would to God we Christians would.
Listen, if we ever get together, my soul, listen, if your church ever just comes together in perfect unity, listen, this community won't be able to contain you. Now, I'm not just about all Christians coming together and dropping doctrinal differences on.
You can't do that. Somebody doesn't believe in the virgin birth. You can't go off fellowship with that. I'm talking about churches of light, faith, and order. You can do that. We can do that. And then the employment of nature's flame only is permitted in fulfillment of divine commandment.
Sexual intercourse, physical cohabitation is done with the recognition that this is a commandment from God. This is a gift from God. It is an act of God, and you do it with a consciousness that you are of God.
Now, you can play with that all day long. That doesn't mean you're thinking about God. That doesn't mean you pray, you know, that's not, and all those things. Not at all, not at all. It's just a general recognition.
You know, Paul said pray without ceasing, be in a prayerful attitude at all times. He wouldn't mean you'd be praying all the time. Just be in constant communication with God. Be accessible and approachable to God at all times.
Recognize that God is involved in your life and everything, significant or insignificant, he is. And then another offering to God is the rearing of generations, and you sanctify them at birth. Sanctify them at birth.
I wanna share with you something we advise all couples to do, and I have couples literally by the thousands around this world are doing it with their children right now in their home. And I can give you letter after letter after letter we have in our files where children, their whole personalities are completely changing within just a couple of weeks' time.
Had a young major from the Air Force who was teaching at the Air Force Academy, wrote me and talked to me about his 12-year-old daughter, and we shared with him just some basic principles that I'll be sharing with you concerning what Jewish people do with a family, and we found it to be very effective as Christian people, and so we began to share with them, and those children's personalities completely changed.
Had an agricultural agent from Arkansas wrote me, told me kids are having all kinds of trouble in school, and then so we shared with them what to do. Had a 19-year-old girl, her mother came to me in Fort Worth and said the same, and I can just give you instant after instant where personalities totally change, and they begin to think about the right things, and then to gear the right, and it's just a matter of doing, well, Jewish people do it from birth, and I'm not saying they wind up in the right place, I am saying that if they would follow the logical conclusion, they would come up knowing Jesus.
They would come up knowing the Son of God, but they stop short of where God wants them to be as many other people do, and so they sanctify a child from birth, not only raise him up, but start him out that way, and then another offering is a loving willingness to willingly bear, a loving willingness to bear the burdens of the home, whatever they are, no matter what the burden is in that home, to bear it, to bear it lovingly and without complaint, without griping, without grieving about it, and just go on and bear it, bear that burden, whatever it is.
The children of Israel built many, many worship places, did they not? You recall they had the tabernacle in the wilderness that Moses built, and Aaron was there, and they raised that tabernacle, there was a place of worship at Shiloh, there was a place of worship at Kadesh Barnea, there was a place to worship here, the place of Mount Zion, Abraham took Isaac and offered him up, all kinds of places, but they're all in ruins, they're gone.
They're no longer, and even the great temple itself in Jerusalem is gone, it was destroyed in 70 A .D., was it not, when Titus and the Roman legions came in, so they don't have that, but Jewish people say that's all right, because there's one place that can never be destroyed, and that's the Jewish home.
That is the Jewish home, and that has become a place of worship, and it can never be destroyed, and in the Jewish home, the divine service of God continues. Passover is done in the synagogue, but Passover's also done in the home, it's done in the home.
Hanukkah, celebrated in the synagogue, but it's also celebrated in the home. Why is it that we believe the church has to provide us everything for our homes, when that's not its job? We ought to be doing some things at home, brethren.
We ought to be doing some celebrating of God at home. Why is home fun and games, and then we want to get spiritual when we come to church? We want to get religious in the congregation. We want to get godly in the auditorium, whenever the home ought to be more sacred than any place on earth.
I think they have a secret here. I think they have a secret. It is said this, if you want to understand the people of Israel, acquaint yourself with a Jewish family. If you want to understand what Israel is all about, if you want to understand the Israelites, if you want to understand what God's doing, acquaint yourself with a Jewish family.
Even if that people should be completely destroyed, it can be rebuilt from that last surviving family. The whole nation can rise back again if there'd be just one family left on earth. If you want to understand them, you have to understand the family.
Now, what basis could they make such a statement on? On the strength of the divine promise that God said, I shall dwell in the midst of thee. I will dwell in the midst of thee. How much more has God promised that to you and me as Christian people?