Looking For Many Good Men - [1 Timothy 3:1-7]

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Well, you know a few weeks ago I taught in 1st Timothy chapter 2 verses 8 to 15 and really it focused on the ladies for the most part and so this morning and I'm thrilled to be here because I really thought you know
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I want to be an equal opportunity blaster. So we're back in 1st
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Timothy this morning in chapter 3 and my remarks are going to be primarily focused on the men but as I think you'll see this is a passage that is applicable to every single person here this morning.
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A few years ago I think you'll remember the Marine Corps had an advertising campaign.
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They said they were looking for a few good men. I mean reflecting on that even just a few years ago, that was remarkably politically incorrect.
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Are they sexist? I mean there are female Marines too, don't they want you know a few good women as well?
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And what's the standard for good? Well I guess the standard would be the Marine Corps standard for what is good.
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But how does the church pick its leaders? How do they find a few good men? I don't want a few,
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I want many. You know people say is there some kind of magic formula whereby you guys only have four elders?
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No, and there was no magic formula when there were five or seven or I mean if we could have 20 elders
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I'd be in favor of that, 30. I mean if every man here were an elder, awesome.
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But the Bible gives us a standard. God has set forth his glass ceiling as it were for what an elder must be.
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How should we choose them? How should we pick elders? Are we to be like a corporation?
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Are we to maybe look for those who have success in the world and choose those men?
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Many churches do that. They look at those who have successful businesses, those who are successful outside of church and they say, you know those guys are leaders, they should be our leaders.
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What about the idea of having elections? I was looking at a church not too long ago and they have three year rotations for their elders.
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I think that's here somewhere. Why would you even have elections or why would you have a three year rotation?
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I think it's basically some kind of Americanization of what the Bible says. I mean after all, you know, a rotation.
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What does everybody deserve a turn to lead the church? How about congregational rule?
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Just kind of get rid of the elders all together or certainly not let them rule over the church because everybody's equal.
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Another misapplication of Galatians 3 .28. We're all equal. What does the
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Bible teach about this? This morning we're going to look at that just by way of quick review and I mean quick.
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1 Timothy is one of the pastoral epistles. In other words, Paul wrote it to Timothy to tell him how to run a church.
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Same with the book of Titus. In chapter 1, Paul told Timothy to stop certain persons from teaching false doctrine.
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In chapter 2, Paul emphasized prayer and he forbade women from leading or teaching men.
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And he tied this prohibition specifically to Eve's sin and the fallout from it.
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He further tied it to the created order. We looked in other passages where it says that women were created as companions for men, as complements to men and not the other way around.
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In fact, last time we talked about five divinely designed differences between men and women. First we said men must lead in prayer.
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Secondly, women must dress appropriately. Now as I read these, it doesn't mean that men don't have to dress appropriately.
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We're going to see that a lot of these same things we can apply to the ladies this morning as we go through 1
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Timothy chapter 3. Thirdly, we saw that women must be disciples. They must be learners.
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Fourth, women must not be teachers. And fifth, women are different from men by divine design.
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And again, I'm thankful for that. I'm thankful for there are differences because there are differences because why would we be attracted to one another if it weren't for those differences?
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Let me read 1 Timothy chapter 3 verses 1 to 7. The saying is trustworthy.
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If anyone aspires to the office of overseer, he desires a noble task. Therefore, an overseer must be above reproach.
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The husband of one wife, sober -minded, self -controlled, respectable, hospitable, able to teach, not a drunkard, not violent, but gentle, not quarrelsome, not a lover of money.
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He must manage his own household well with all dignity, keeping his children submissive.
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For if someone does not know how to manage his own household, how will he care for God's church?
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He must not be a recent convert or he may become puffed up with conceit and fall into the condemnation of the devil.
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Moreover, he must be well thought of by outsiders so that he may not fall into disgrace, into a snare of the devil.
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Now this morning, I want to draw your attention to five God -given goods.
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Not products, but goods, meaning inherently good things. Drawn from our text so that you will see, not only see the office of elder rightly, but also that you will take the time to examine your own life, to look at your, the way you're living, to examine yourself.
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No one here, no one who is here this morning can say that these standards have no application for you, that they have no claim over your lives because as we will see, all but one of these requirements, we would say they're just living the
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Christian life. This is ultimately a matter of obedience.
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My goal is not just to give the men a working over, a thorough thrashing as I like to say, although that's not a bad thing, but to encourage everyone here this morning to hold up your life to this standard, to see where you fall short and I think you're going to see that ultimately there isn't much difference between what a consistent
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Christian life is and the requirements for an elder, our first God -given good.
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It is good to want to be an elder. It's a good thing. In fact, it is, the statement itself is a truism, a maxim, a rule of thumb, something that is always true.
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Look at verse one, the saying is trustworthy and literally what Paul writes is faithful is the word.
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In other words, what is about to follow, what he's about to say is something that you can take to the bank. It's like the sun rises in the east.
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I'll never forget my brother took a psychological exam to get on the sheriff's department, which he thankfully failed and if he's listening,
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I apologize. He's doing much better than the sheriff's department these days, but the shrink sat him down and she asked, she said, well, how would you feel tomorrow if the sun rose in the west?
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And I think that was his moment of failure right there. Do you have anything more insane to ask?
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But there are some things that are just inherently true. How do I know that it's good to want to be an elder? Because Paul says that it's good to want to be an elder.
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It's a faithful saying, something that is always true. He says that wanting to be an elder is a noble task.
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Again, look at verse one. If anyone aspires to the office of overseer, he desires a noble task.
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That idea of noble again, it's just good, but it's inherently good. Everything about it is good and right and it's a worthwhile pursuit.
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It's God approved. And right away, just looking at that verse, we can rule out several things.
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First, we can rule out the idea that elders just want to seize the reins of power. They want to take over.
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They want to run the place. That wouldn't be noble. Secondly, we can rule out the idea that being an elder is something that everyone would want to do because it's just a good thing to want.
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Not everybody's going to want it. We can also rule out the idea that it's something that everyone can do.
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He says, look, just having the desire itself is good. It doesn't mean everyone's going to do it. It doesn't mean everybody's going to get there.
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We'll see a little bit further in this chapter. In fact, in verse two, we'll see that women cannot be elders.
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Of course, that would be ruled out in chapter two, but it's consistent here. Why? Because he goes on to say, the husband of one wife, women, generally speaking, cannot be the husband of one wife.
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It's impossible. In fact, we'll see that the language renders that impossible.
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Now, can a man simply set out the goal, you know what, in two years I want to be an elder, and here's my roadmap of how to get there, you know, step one, step two, step three?
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It's not how it works. It's a good desire to have. But we're talking about a consistent
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Christian testimony, consistent Christian life. In fact, I was even thinking I could have, maybe
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I should have brought Charlie's little book up here this morning, but I thought, you know, I could have used that as my outline.
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In my life, be glorified, Lord. In my house, in the church, be glorified, because that's what this passage is talking about.
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We want to glorify God with our lives, and the end result of that is, some of us will be called to be elders.
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But can you imagine somebody, you know, kind of laying the groundwork to be an elder or setting up a campaign?
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I mean, I'll just use Bernard because I know him, but can you just imagine, you know, Bernard for elder posters showing up all around?
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That is nowhere, nowhere pictured here. We are to structure our lives so that we are elder -worthy, and then the church appropriately recognizes that.
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Now, I keep calling the office elder, but the text says overseer. Well, which is it? Make up your mind. Well, yeah, okay, fine.
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An overseer is one who is, now listen to this, engaged in oversight, supervision, and this is used of leaders in Christian communities.
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So overseer, elder, presbyter, whatever word you want to use, they're all kind of interchanged.
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Elders are leaders. Leaders within the church are elders. What is an elder?
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Well, first of all, he is a leader. Hebrews 13, 17 says, obey your leaders and submit to them for they are keeping watch over your souls as those who will have to give an account.
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Let them do this with joy and not with groaning for that would be of no advantage to you. Elders are those who will give an account for you, for your souls, much like as we're going to see a husband and father is responsible for what happens in his home, an elder is responsible for what happens in the church, in the local congregation.
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They're also shepherds, 1 Peter 5, 1 to 3. Peter writes, so I exhort the elders among you as a fellow elder and as a witness of the sufferings of Christ as well as a partaker in the glory that is going to be revealed.
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Shepherd the flock of God. They are shepherds that is among you, exercising oversight, that's what it means, to shepherd them, not under compulsion but willingly as God would have you, not for shameful gain but eagerly, not domineering over those in your charge but being examples to the flock.
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So they are to be examples to the flock, they're not to be domineering but notice it also says there in verse 3, in your charge.
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Picture here is shepherds having under them, having under their charge sheep and they protect them, they watch over them, they make sure they don't go too far this way or the other way.
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But ultimately elders are under shepherds, they're not in charge ultimately because they are under shepherds of the great shepherd.
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But what does a shepherd do? A shepherd as I said protects the flock and he willingly bears that responsibility.
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And what does that mean practically speaking? It means praying for the flock, it means being willing to give up sleep sometimes because you just can't stop thinking about different things that are going on in the church.
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It means sometimes getting phone calls on your day off, late at night, whatever. It means dealing with the heartbreak of sin, it means listening to incredible conversations.
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It is in many ways a burden and it's more like, in many ways, it's more like parenting than anything else.
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It's certainly more like that than being a CEO or something like that because it is a great burden and at the same time it's a great joy.
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Elders must also be teachers. Titus 1 .9 when Paul was describing the office of overseer, elder, presbyter to Titus he said he must hold firm to the trustworthy word as taught so that he may be able to give instruction in sound doctrine and also to rebuke those who contradict it.
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This is a weighty calling, not something to be entered into lightly.
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In the early church, elders were pillars of the community, often invited to all the cool parties and, you know, poshly served and waited on.
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No. In the early church, persecution against the church, against Christians would focus on who?
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On the leaders. Who would want to be an elder under those circumstances? Think about stories concerning the
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Soviet Union and the church there, the Baptist Church during the Cold War when one pastor was carted off and then the next elder had to step up to be the pastor.
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Who would want to be an elder under those circumstances? You cannot choose such men on the basis of worldly success or popularity or even have some kind of ad hoc committee as so many churches do where they have a few ladies and a few guys and a few maybe, you know, people who occasionally attend and they go out on a pastoral search.
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There is a God -given series of qualifications an elder must meet. Now, as I already mentioned, you know, what does it mean that it is a noble task?
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It means it is inherently good. It could be defined this way. It predominantly designates what is ethically good, noble, worth striving for.
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In other words, the office of the elder or overseer is a good thing. And it is not the man who makes the office or the office which makes the man.
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The work of an elder is deemed good by Paul writing under the inspiration of the Holy Spirit, our second
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God -given good. It is good to be well thought of within the church. It's good to have a good reputation within the church.
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Everyone would want that. Look at verse 2. Therefore, an overseer must be above reproach.
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One writer says that such a man not only has a good reputation but deserves it.
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Accusations may fly against him but if they are fairly evaluated and that's the key, they will be dismissed.
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There may be rumors, innuendo, smears, but even the most serious charges brought against him will not stick.
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Now consider this. Was not the Lord himself maligned? Didn't the Pharisees say that he was illegitimate?
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Didn't they say that he did things by the power of Satan? They brought all kinds of accusations against him, all kinds of lies, spread rumors about him.
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The question is not whether someone says something negative about you, but whether when the full truth is known, these charges will stand.
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When you have your day in court, so to speak, will you be found guilty? And even after a man holds the office, there are specific means for bringing accusations against him.
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You don't just willy -nilly make a man an elder and you don't just willy -nilly take him out. First Timothy 5 .19.
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Don't turn there. I'm just going to read it. Do not admit a charge. In other words, don't even consider a charge against an elder except on the evidence of two or three witnesses.
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Why? Well, it's not because an elder is better than anyone else, but to protect the church from being divided over false accusations.
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With anyone, I don't care who it is in the church, from the pastor to the newest attendee, the goal should never be to bring them down.
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The goal is to get the truth and to do so with the least amount of turmoil and trouble.
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What did Jesus say in Matthew 18? He say, if your brother sins, start a rumor campaign against him.
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If your brother sins, you call the newspaper. No. If your brother sins against you, go and tell him his faults between you and him alone.
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If he listens to you, you have gained your brother. And then what do you do?
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You take one or two witnesses. Why would anyone think that it would be okay to do anything else?
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It is never okay to slander anyone, and it is never okay to spread rumors about anyone, period, whether they're in leadership or not in leadership.
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An elder, notice in verse 2, must also be the husband of one wife.
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A lot of confusion over this issue, and I have to cover it quickly. What doesn't it mean?
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Well, it doesn't mean that a man has to be married to be an elder. If we had an elder here and his wife died, he doesn't need to step down.
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If he's never been married, it doesn't mean he needs to step down. It also doesn't mean that polygamy is okay except for elders.
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I mean, read that. The husband of one wife, right? It's okay. I don't want to be an elder.
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I can have multiple. No, no, no. That's not what it means. It also doesn't mean an elder whose wife has died cannot remarry.
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It does mean, literally, a one -wife husband, a one -woman man.
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In other words, a man who is married must be fully devoted to his wife. He cannot have his above -reproachness, he can't have a good reputation within the church if he's compromised in this area.
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What does this mean practically? Well, husbands, here. Here's some practical insights.
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Don't flirt with other women. Don't go out alone for lunch with female co -workers.
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Don't allow yourselves to even have the appearance that some other woman has your affections, even a little part of them.
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Of course, we live in a world where many men are visited by pornography. Husbands, you cannot be a one -woman man and be involved with other women in any sense.
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And as I said before, it definitely rules out female elders. That's not going to work. At Bethlehem Bible Church, we also hold that it means that a divorced, a man divorced as a
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Christian cannot be an elder. Now, a man shows he obeys the
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Lord's command to honor marriage, which is Hebrews 13 .4, by investing all of his emotional and sexual energy into his wife.
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She must be the sole focus of his romantic endeavors. That's what it means to be a one -wifed husband, to be the husband of one wife.
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An elder must also, in verse 2, be sober -minded. He's not known for excess in anything, but is well -known or is known to live a well -balanced life.
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He is spiritually earnest. He is thoughtful. The origin of the word has to do with the use of alcohol, hence sober.
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But its application here is much more broad than that, and that's why alcohol is mentioned later. A man who is sober -minded is someone who might reasonably expect to get good counsel from.
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He's not some goofball. Sober -minded, sober -minded man is someone who examines everything through the lens of the word of God.
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Now, again, I ask, is there anything here so far that is beyond what we would expect for each of our lives?
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Is there some super high standard, you know, uber -Christian? Do you need a big
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S on your chest? But we're not done.
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An elder must also be self -controlled, in verse 2, in control of yourself, prudent, thoughtful.
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He is sensible of sound mind. One writer says, I like this one, sane. And it also implies that he doesn't just fall for false teachers.
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And that was an issue, remember, in this area. Technically, it means he has the ability to curb desires and impulses so as to produce a measured and orderly life.
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Okay. What does that mean? It just means he doesn't have
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ADD. He doesn't run all over the place. He's not scatter -minded. He's focused on his life.
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It's orderly. You can see that everything just kind of flows together. He's not the guy at the church that everyone kind of just says, what's he going to do now?
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What's next on his list? He's predictable, or better yet, he is dependable.
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Again, in verse 2, an elder must also be respectable, having characteristics or qualities that evoke admiration or delight, an expression of high regard for the person.
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Now, I found it interesting that the same word, again, it has its root cosmos or world, but it has this idea of orderliness, inner moral excellence.
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And it's the same word used for how women should dress in 1 Timothy 2 .9. Women are to be respectable in their dress.
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Men are to be respectable in their actions. One man said, the ministry is no place for the man whose life is a continual confusion of unaccomplished plans and unorganized activity.
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Respectable, well -ordered. An elder must also be hospitable.
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In the ancient world, one did not make reservations at the
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Ritz. You could even make them at the Motel 6. Nobody was leaving the light on for you.
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And when you could find a place to stay, very often they were places where a Christian should not stay. There was all kinds of sin going on in those places.
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So an elder was one who was expected to open his home to Christians, maybe even
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Christians he didn't know. Did you know that this is part of our tax, it's built into our tax code?
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There's a presumption in the law that pastors will open their homes to visitors. You know what
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I love personally? I love it when, you know, Janet and I did this not too long ago. We were out and we had some, this is going to sound bad, but we had some time to kill.
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And we're like, who lives close to here? We just stopped in on somebody. And they didn't kick us out or anything.
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You know, it was pretty nice. That's hospitality. Again, I don't think this is some kind of amazing standard.
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I can't imagine going to somebody's home who says they're a believer and having them be less than hospitable.
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But it's beyond that. It is a matter of saying, look, we have a home, but it's not really our home.
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And we're willing to share our home with those who need a place to stay. Now here we are, again in verse two, at the one qualification that is not a universal standard for Christian conduct.
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Able to teach. Able to teach.
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That is really a problematic and a weak translation. I like what the King James does here with apt to teach.
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But the word actually means, this is a dictionary definition, skillful in teaching.
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I mean, able to teach just sounds like you had some of those college professors who could just go up that maybe they could fill up an hour and a half, but you didn't learn anything.
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This is a man who can handle the word and do so in a public forum. He's not a man who consistently makes a hash out of the scripture.
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I mean, people say, you know, sometimes, well, sometimes they say nice message, pastor or whatever.
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My job and the job of every elder is to get up and proclaim the Bible and to not so mess it up that nobody, people go, really, does it really say that?
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I can't, I can't even believe that. I made mention of a sermon
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I heard a few weeks ago and it was just a stark example of what not to do.
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This guy had a great passage that laid out the glories of Christ and his deity. I mean, it screamed
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Jesus is God, God in the flesh. And his message was, in essence,
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I'll tell you exactly what his message was because he said it probably about 20 times. He said, Jesus wants to use your boat.
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Will you let him use your boat? I got madder and madder as I listened to it.
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I mean, you know, it reminds me a little bit of MacArthur when he, you know, first gave his first message in seminary and the professor said, well, that was very well constructed.
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Nice job. Just one problem, you missed the point of the passage. It's like I was in seminary and the guy who was preaching that morning, he said in our seminary lab, discipleship lab thing, he'd mentioned to me earlier what he was going to do and I just thought, gee,
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I don't know if that's really right, but, you know, you're so busy, who has time to kind of come alongside and say, you know, let me rewrite your message for you.
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So he preaches it that morning, but here was the trick. The trick was or the problem I had was that the professor right before he preaches says, okay,
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Steve, I want you to critique this message. So he gets done and I already made up my mind beforehand.
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Early on in the year, you know, things, if you can believe it or not, in seminary, you know, guys have read so much that they apply kind of their book smarts to spiritual issues and so they get really kind of picky.
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In fact, I would say a little bit catty in these preaching classes and so I just,
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I had made up my mind I was going to find something positive to say if I was ever called upon to do this. So he gets done and he's just totally, he's totally messed this whole thing up.
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I mean, it's about the new covenant and he gets up and he wants to talk about evangelism and I'm going, new covenants, what is the new covenant?
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He doesn't tell us. He just talks about this obligation to do evangelism, which is true, but it's not what the passage is about.
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So he's done and the professor kind of got up quickly and went to the back of the room to shut off the video camera and I thought, oh, he's going to bail me out.
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He started making some comments and I'm not going to say anything. And he goes, okay, Steve, what do you think? And I go, really excellent transitions.
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I mean, I really appreciated the way it flowed from point to point. I really, uh, it was, uh, but I think he might've missed the point of the passage.
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That's exactly right. That's what he said. I was like, then he just shredded the guy.
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It was not apt to teach, at least not that day. It wasn't a good day. You can't miss the main point of the passage.
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Congregation shouldn't look like everybody just passed out sleeping pills before he started. Now, does that mean that every man is going to be a great teacher?
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No, that's not what it means, which is good for me because it means I don't have to be R .C. Sproul, John MacArthur, Steve Lawson.
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I don't have to get up here and rock your world every week. I don't even have to be Mike Abendroth.
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All I have to do is preach the word. Apt to teach means you can cut it straight.
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An elder, a pastor, must be able to cut it straight. He must accurately handle the word of God.
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In fact, again, in Titus 1 .9, it says an elder must hold firm to the trustworthy word, listen, as taught.
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He must take that which he's learned and he has to give it to other people. And you say, well, that's regurgitation.
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I don't ever want to be known as the guy who came up with a new doctrine. I don't want to be the guy who says, you know,
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I've discovered insights that no one's ever seen before. I don't want to be that guy. It is a sacred trust handed down from faithful men to faithful men and passed on.
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Must hold firm to the trustworthy word as taught, so that with the purpose of, so that he may be able to give instruction in sound doctrine.
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That's where we, what we are to do is to give instruction in sound doctrine.
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People say, I don't really like doctrine. Doctrine's boring. Doctrine is the Bible from beginning to end.
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It's truth about God. You are a theologian whether you like it or not. Even an atheist is a theologian.
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He just has a hundred percent wrong theology. There is no such thing as improved or recently uncovered truth.
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And in fact, what do we do with those men? We rebuke those who contradict sound doctrine.
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That means that that word means in case you're wondering to speak against them. And sometimes that means we name them by name.
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Why? Because as shepherds, as protectors of the flock, we need to point out errant teaching and we need to let you know who's doing that.
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We might've heard something horrendous. You've heard some names from this pulpit before.
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If we just tell you what they say and you didn't hear it, then you might not ever know. You might not ever know what some of these people say.
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I was reading the other day. Let me think of what the woman's name is. Uh, most popular
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Oh, Meyer, Joyce Meyer. But she grossed like this was out of Christianity Today.
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Her ministry grossed $112 million last year. $112 million to hear false teaching.
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It's amazing. Our budget hasn't quite reached that yet.
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We're closing the gap though. Okay, our first two goods.
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It is good to want to be an elder. And secondly, it is good to be well thought of within the church.
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These are good things. Third, God given good. It is good to be well thought of outside of the church to have good reputation outside of the church.
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We've looked at the qualifications that the church ought to know. They ought to know whether a man is apt to teach.
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They ought to know whether he's got issues outside of his marriage, all these kind of things.
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But what about what outsiders think? And you think, well, what does that have to do with anything? Well, what if they have a really bad reputation outside of the church?
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Look at, we're going to skip down to just verse seven here for a moment. Moreover, he must be well thought of by outsiders so that he may not fall into disgrace, into a snare of the devil.
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A man who would be an elder must have a good testimony outside the church. That's what it means to be well thought of.
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That's the word there, a good testimony. The unbelieving world must have no reason to disbelieve the gospel because of the way he lives his life.
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This verse would also point to unbelievers having a knowledge of a weakness in this man, a character flaw.
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Maybe even one that they could use to weaken the church or to bring him down and thus bring shame upon the name of Christ.
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Now there are qualifications that are mentioned here in this passage that maybe the outside world would be more aware of because we're only here on Sundays.
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Sometimes we're in Bible study on Friday, but we're not with one another 24 -7.
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We're certainly not with, say, Pastor Dave or Elder Pradeep as they go to work. These standards apply to all elders.
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But again, these are things that maybe the church wouldn't be aware of. Look at verse 3.
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It says that he cannot be a drunkard. It's pretty straightforward. But again, it's not anything that doesn't apply to every
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Christian. When is being drunk allowed? Or when is it not considered a sin?
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Let me say it that way. It's always a sin to be drunk. Paul prohibits it in Ephesians 5 .18.
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Do not be drunk with wine, but instead be filled with the Spirit. And drunkard has the idea of being addicted to wine.
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Originally, I pictured a man who spent a good amount of time with wine, just kind of lingered with wine.
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And for those of you in my generation, that is those of us approaching Social Security age, we can think of Otis from the
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Andy Griffith show, the kind of lovable, laughable drunk. And for today's generation,
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I have no idea who it would be, but the point is that getting drunk or getting high or whatever is not acceptable for someone who would be an elder.
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He needs to be, as we're going to see, self -controlled in all these other areas. But if you don't have any self -control over substances, you're not going to have self -control in other areas either.
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And this leads right into the next qualification or disqualification, as it were, in verse 3, he must not be violent.
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You ever been around a drunk? I have, more than I care to be. I mean, maybe my first kind of dealing with someone who was violent and drunk,
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I was in the army in Okinawa, and I got loaned to Kadena Air Base, because we were on a really small base, nothing happened really.
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And so they sent me to Kadena Air Base for a couple of weeks, and we got a call that a sailor who was, sorry for all the navy people, my wife included, a sailor who had just come in from time at sea, several months at sea, and ditched his taxi cab.
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And so we responded to the location, and this guy didn't have the money. He spent all his money drinking, didn't have the money, and so we found him hiding in the tall weeds, and we took him into the station.
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This guy was seriously, I mean, he was half my size. Again, no, I'm not disparaging the navy or anything like that, you know.
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But, so we go to take our handcuffs off of him, and I told the guy, when we went to put him in, I said, now,
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I'm going to take these handcuffs off. We don't really, we really don't want to hurt you. You know, we know you're just drunk, and we're just going to put you in here and let you sleep it off.
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Okay, okay, okay. Unhook him, and the fight is on. I mean, you know, it was just like, why?
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Because he's not thinking rightly. He's out of control. Drunkenness leads to, often, violence.
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They aren't necessarily linked, but they can be. But how about an elder who's just known, not as a drunkard, maybe he's just known as a bully.
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Somebody who just browbeats people or just kind of uses his size against them. You know, somebody who's ready to go to blows or throw down.
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How about this, a man, how about an elder who's known as being a guy with a chip on his shoulder. Go ahead,
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I dare you. Again, imagine the shame brought on the church if the world knew that an elder was a drunk or a violent man, or both.
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That he was known to be a brawler, a fighter. And the contrast here, but.
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Again, it's interesting when we see that word but, sometimes it can be the small word day, and sometimes it can be
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Allah, which is A -L -L -A, not to be confused with the Muslim God. And it is the strongest possible contrast.
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He says, don't be violent, but instead be gentle. What does that mean?
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It says, or the dictionary would define it this way, not insisting on every right of letter of law or custom.
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Yielding, kind, courteous, tolerant. Can you remember when tolerant meant just being nice and not meaning that you condoned sin or whatever?
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But when I think about this gentle, I think of Christ, who did not insist on having his own rights.
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Who was unfailingly kind and tolerated everything except what?
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Two things. Hypocrisy and false teachers. Those were the people that he confronted.
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We're to be gentle. Christians ought to be gentle. Again, notice, as I'm going through this list, these are not things that are, you know, above and beyond what a
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Christian should be. This is what we all should be known for. Further on in verse 3, an elder must not be quarrelsome.
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It means he's not an arguer. He's not known for just wanting to get into, we talked about physical altercations, but not to get into verbal altercations.
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He's a problem solver, not an arguer. He's someone who would rather defer than fight.
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The word literally means peaceable. Elder is not wimpy, but he's not someone who would choose to argue when there's really nothing worth fighting for in this particular instance.
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He wants to honor God, not to get his own point across. An elder must also not be, in verse 3, a lover of money.
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Think about it. This man will be making decisions for the church. He will be representing the local community in some form or another.
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Would you want him to be known in the town, known in the community as a man who puts money first in his life, who always considers the bottom line, who's always out to make a profit at someone else's expense?
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I'll never forget my dad mocking one Christian teacher. He used to brag about all the stuff he had,
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Cadillacs, etc., etc., etc., and this man taught that God wanted him to have all the finer things in life so that people would ask him how he got it.
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What did Jesus say? Where your treasure is, in other words, what you value, there your heart will be also.
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Elder should not be known for his greed, for his desire to make dishonest gain. He should be a hard worker, but not greedy.
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Fourth, God -given good. It is good to be well thought of. We talked about outside to have a good reputation.
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How about well thought of in your home and for his home? It is good for people who look on the outside to look at your home and think, that's a well run home.
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Look at verse 4. He must manage his own household well. And the verb manage, by the way, isn't about creating organizational charts.
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It says to exercise a position of leadership, rule, to direct, to be at the head.
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I say this to every guy. When somebody comes in for counseling and there's a problem in their home,
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I say, you know what, it's your fault. And they say, what? It is your fault.
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I don't care what the issue is. Well, let me phrase that a little differently. It's not your fault, but it's your responsibility.
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A man is responsible for everything that goes on in his home. Why? Because he has the authority in his home and therefore he is responsible for it.
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It says that right there. He has to manage his household well.
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He has to run it well. He has to lead it well. He is also, the
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Bible would tell us in Ephesians 5 .23, the head of the wife. And he cannot be an elder if he doesn't lead, rule, direct, manage his own household well.
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Well, what are some of the implications of this? Finances. He has to know where his money is going.
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How about his relationship with his wife? We've talked about being a one -woman man, but what about just the idea maybe that the husband and wife just don't get along?
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They're living separated even while they're in the same home. That man cannot be an elder. People look at his home or they visit and they just go, this place is chaotic.
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Cannot be an elder. More about the home.
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An elder's children must not be out of control. Verse 4, with all dignity, keeping his children submissive.
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You say you don't know my child. All I know is what the Bible says here. What does it mean that an elder's children must be submissive?
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Well, it is the opposite. Being submissive is the opposite of setting oneself up as a controller.
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In other words, here's the question. Do your kids run your house? Are they in charge?
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Would you like to say, my house, my rules, but you're afraid of what the kids will say? I mean,
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I think about my own dad and I just, I never would have thought about exercising authority over my dad or declaring my autonomy.
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Well, that's fine. That's fine, dad, but you know, I don't have any time for that. Now, my dad was gone by the time
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I was eight, but I mean, he was just a scary guy and I wouldn't have crossed him for anything. And part of the problem,
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I think, in Christian homes today is that we brought into this or bought into this lie that children can and should raise themselves, that they're autonomous little persons and that they'll sort of sort it out themselves.
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That is an abdication of your responsibility as a father. Here's the main problem.
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The main problem is keeping your kids in line is hard work. Men are not by nature hard workers.
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We have to force ourselves to be hard workers. We can't, you know, just come home and go, my house is out of control.
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Turn on the TV and think it's going to sort itself out. It's not going to, it's going to get worse. If a man's children do not respect him and they will not obey him, whether or not they are believers.
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You can have unbelieving children, but if they don't respect and will not obey on you or obey you, that reflects on you.
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Look at verse five. For if someone does not know how to manage his own household that is rule it, that is lead it.
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How will he care for God's church? You say you want to lead and feed the shepherd, you know, shepherd the flock.
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Look at your house. If the kids are running wild, the wife is spending money like there's no tomorrow.
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And every moment in your home looks like the opening chaotic scene and home alone. Not only should you be thinking or not be thinking,
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I want to be an elder. You should be thinking, I need to talk to one of those elders and get this thing going here. This is, this is all wrong.
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Kiss the marker, says this, says a father must exercises authority. And this is, this is so key. I mean,
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I like to send this out. Maybe I will this week. A father must exercise his authority with his children in such a manner that the father's firmness makes it advisable for a child to obey.
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I like that. It's advisable for you to obey that his wisdom makes it natural for a child to obey.
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It's not enough to just be in control. You have to be a teacher. You have to walk. And as they get older, you have to instruct them more someday they're going to be in this place and they need to learn the lessons that you have learned, that his wisdom makes it natural for a child to obey and that his love makes it a pleasure for a child to obey.
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You want your kids to respect you, to obey you, and to love you.
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And you cannot do that by unplugging. What's the worldly saying?
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You know, he's a chip off the old block. Another one, the apple doesn't fall far from the tree. Well, there's truth in that.
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The world knows that a child is heavily influenced and impacted by his father, even though they're trying to run fathers out of the home, trying to figure out some way to get children without fathers.
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But our children are reflections of us and the atmosphere, the home that we create, whether we like it or not.
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And to some extent, men, so are our wives. The good news here this morning, even as I said a little bit earlier, kind of hinted at, if you're if you're thinking he's talking to me right now, my house is out of control.
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It's not too late to change things. Reviewing one, it is good to want to be an elder to it is good to be well thought of within the church.
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Three, it is good to be well thought of outside the church for it is good to be well thought of in your home and for your home.
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And fifthly, it is good to be well grounded in the truth. Look at verse six.
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An elder cannot be new to the faith. He must not be a recent convert. Literally, that word is neophyte.
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You know, would you go to the office of neophyte dentistry? You know, heart surgeon, neophyte.
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Yeah, that's the guy I want. You don't put a baby
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Christian, somebody who's just been saved. And you don't say, you know what, I really like this guy. He's very impressive.
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And you know, he's got a lot of organizational skills. I think we should make an elder. No. I don't care how great he is.
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The answer is no. How often do you see, you know, celebrities trotted forth as great leaders of the
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Christian faith? Or they're brought in as some crusade to give their testimonies as if their testimonies have more weight because they're famous.
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Recently, a famous convert, Anne Rice, she said she announced,
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I don't know, a year or two ago that she was a Christian. Well, now she's announced she's not a Christian anymore. Why?
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Because any religion that forbade or forbids homosexuality was not for her.
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So she said, well, now I'm not a Christian anymore. Being an elder is not something that can be rushed.
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You want to judge a man's qualities and character over a period of time. You want to make sure of his doctrine, his home life, his reputation, his love for the local church and the church universal.
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Now, what happens if you give someone or if you make someone an elder who's not ready?
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Look at verse six. We're not to make them new believers, elders.
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And look at verse six. Or he may become puffed up with conceit and fall into the condemnation of the devil.
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Now, it's interesting to me because the English translation, pardon me, really makes a hash of it. The Greek words translated or, it's two words and they just condensed it into two letters,
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I guess, O -R. It's really two words and they are hynna. And for those of you who study
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Greek at all or may have heard that word before, it just means there's a purpose that he's about to give. Hynna and may, which is a negation, a no.
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So it's in order that not or something like that or literally so that not or more fully so that not puffed up he may become.
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You don't want to take a new believer and make him an elder so that or with the purpose of not allowing him to become inflated with himself.
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I have this little saying where I say, insert needle, reduce air pressure. It would not be good to do that.
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I mean, think about this. What would happen if you put an 18 -year -old in charge of the United States? What happened if you put an 11 -year -old in charge of the
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United States? How about a four -year -old? You wouldn't do it. You'd think it's crazy.
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I mean, it's a wisdom. I think of the fathers of our forefathers that they set a requirement at all, but the younger that we made the age to be present, the more absurd the outcome would be.
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Now, spiritually speaking, the same principle applies. Some may grasp the fullness of the
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Bible more rapidly than others. Some may devote themselves to study more than others, but new believers cannot be trusted with the keys of the church.
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They cannot be put in charge. And I would also just say that a man, any man approached about being in leadership needs to really grasp the gravity of what he's being asked to do.
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It's not a bad thing to think you guys do realize who you're talking to. It's not a bad thing.
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A little humility, a little self -examination is good. Conceit, the opposite of that, listen to the definitions of conceit, the
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Greek word that's defined to seed here. It means to be wrapped in mist or smoke, to be blinded, to become foolish, to become mentally ill.
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It means to become deluded about who you are, to see yourself in a way that is not based in reality.
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And why is that relevant? Well, because that's exactly what Satan did, didn't he? When he fell, he decided he was going to become like God.
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He was going to ascend to the most high. He had delusions of grandeur, as they say.
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Several years ago, Apple Computer Company was foundering. It was losing much of its already small market share.
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Windows -based machines were making inroads even in education, where Apple had previously had an edge.
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And then Steve Jobs came back to the corporation over the last year and a half because I didn't buy the stock.
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It has tripled. And over the several years, even before that, innovations have poured out of the company, everything from the iPod to the iPhone, all these
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I's, I, I, I, I, I. Apple has taken off.
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Now, was it Steve Jobs? Was he the guy who changed everything? Was he in his garage working 24 -7, you know, cranking out new inventions?
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No. But what he did was implement a culture that allowed for innovation, that encouraged it, and more importantly, he gave investors from the outside confidence in the future of the company.
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Leadership matters in business. How much more in the church? There are unseen forces constantly attacking the church, seeking to bring the infection of false doctrine into her life's blood, seeking to divide her by means of petty self -interest, seeking to neuter the church's mission by means of politics.
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God has ordained the means for leading and feeding his church. He has set the standard. What is most striking is that apart from the aptitude to teach, as I said earlier, this standard that we think, oh, it's so lofty, look at that, describes the
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Christian life. It's all about, even as Andrew was saying this morning at Sunday school, about obedience, about taking the word and implementing it in your life, even in the home.
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I mean, this message this morning could stretch out over a full year.
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Why? Because there's so much practical truth in it. So many things to flesh out and to work out in your daily lives.
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Five God -given goods. It is good to want to be an elder. It is good to be well thought of within the church.
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It is good to be well thought of outside the church. It is good to be well thought of in your home and for your home.
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And it is good to be well -grounded in the truth. At Bethlehem Bible Church, we want many good men, not supermen, but men enabled by the
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Holy Spirit to live a life consistent with the word of God. Let's pray.
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Our Father, we are reminded again of the high standard you've set, not just for the leadership, but for everyone that you've called, for everyone that you've saved, for everyone in whom you have placed your spirit.
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Father, you did not redeem us. You did not send your Son in order that we might live exactly as the world lives.
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Lord, would you convict us today to examine our lives and our homes, to look at the places where we need to be more obedient, not out of a sense of legalism, but in wanting to glorify you, in wanting to reflect outwardly the truth that you have convicted us of inwardly.
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Lord, I would pray for each one here today that we would be not just new creations in Christ in our own mind, but that our lives would reflect that.
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Father, I pray that you would give us many elders here, many men who would live lives that are so exemplary, that would have homes that are just Christ -honoring and Christ -centered.
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Lord, we would pray for that kind of church growth. Father, I pray for each one here, that we would just be convicted of our need to study, of our need to talk, and of our need to live out the truths of your word each and every day,