1 Samuel 2:12-36 and 4:10-18 Falling Head Over Heels For Your Children: The Sad Story of Eli

You are listening to the podcast of Recast Church in Mattawan, Michigan. You know, whenever I get to speak, and here it's about once or twice a year, but I was just, last week

I was preaching at the church that I grew up in, in Ohio, and they usually just say, hey, just, whatever's on your heart, share it.

Which sounds great, it's better to say, here's a passage, I want you to preach on this, than I have focus study. And, you know, my heart, because of everything that's happened over the last several weeks with my family, and with my daughter and her husband, the idea of parenting, and even parenting today, is something that is fresh on my heart.

I looked up some research, the Pew Research Group, they just finished up some research that was done, it was,

I believe it was September 20th of 2020, and they just did it for about a week or so, ended it the first week of October of 2020, and the results came out in about a 60 or 70 page study, which

I can get you if you want it, on parenting, and they were talking about a lot of different areas when it comes to parenting, and they were talking about some of the greatest concerns that parents today have for their kids, and it shouldn't surprise you that mental health is the top of the list right now for kids today, that parents have their greatest concern.

We've seen that, I think, pre -pandemic and now post -pandemic, we've seen that to be just an incredible need and concern.

Most parents say that parenting is harder than they expected it to be, but they also rate themselves really high as they are doing a good job in parenting.

I thought that was interesting. Parents prioritize financial stability and job satisfaction as being most important for their kids, their expectations for their kids in the future.

40 % of these parents surveyed considered themselves to be overprotective parents.

43 % of parents say they are raising children similar, in a similar way to the way that they were raised.

44 % say that they are raising children in a totally different way than the way that they were raised.

Over 80 % of parents in this survey find parenting to be the most enjoyable.

So if they had a list of what was the most or least enjoyable, they thought that parenting was the most enjoyable, 80 % of them, and yet, from that same group, 41 % and then 29 % also found it to be very stressful and also found it to be very tiring.

Clearly, they don't have newborns because it would be a lot higher on the tiring side. 35 % of parents, this

I thought was really interesting, 35 % of parents in this survey find it important for their children to have similar religious beliefs than they do.

Only 35%. We're going to turn and we're going to read in 1 Samuel.

We're going to read more later than what we're actually doing right now. I want to look at the story. We're going to look at the story of life of a guy by the name of Eli.

We'll talk about him in just a minute, but let's just pick up here on the story. In 1 Samuel chapter 2, we're going to read verses 12 to 17 first.

Now, the sons of Eli were worthless men. They did not know the

Lord. The custom of the priests with the people was that any man offered sacrifice, the priest's servant would come while the meat was boiling with a three -pronged fork in his hand.

He would thrust it into the pan or the kettle or the cauldron or the pot. All that the fork brought up, the priest would take for himself.

This was what they did at Shiloh to all the Israelites who came there. Moreover, before the fat was burned, the priest's servants would come and say to the man who was sacrificing,

Give meat for your priest to roast, for he will not accept boiled meat from you, but only raw.

And if the man said to him, Let them burn the fat first and let him take it as much as you wish, he would say,

No, you must give it now. And if not, I will take it by force.

Thus the sin of the young men was very great in the eyes of the Lord, for the men treated the offering of the

Lord with contempt. Jumping down to verse 22. Now Eli was very old, and he kept hearing all that his sons were doing to all

Israel, and how they laid with the women who were serving at the entrance of the Tent of Meeting. And he said to them,

Why do you do such things? For I hear of your evil dealings from all the people.

Know, my sons, it is no good report that I hear from the people of the Lord spreading abroad.

If someone sins against man, God will mediate for him.

But if someone sins against the Lord, who can intercede for him? But they would not listen to the voice of their father, for it was the will of the

Lord to put them to death. Probably turn a page over, we're going to go to chapter 4.

And we're going to look at verses 16 and 18. And a man said to Eli, I am he who has come from the battle.

I fled from the battle today, and he said, How did it go, my son? He who brought news answered and said,

Israel has fled before the Philistines, and there has been a great defeat among the people. Your two sons,

Hophni and Phinehas, are dead, and the ark of God has been captured.

As soon as he mentioned the ark of God, Eli fell over backwards from his seat by the side of the gate, and his neck was broken and he died, for he was old and heavy.

He judged Israel for 40 years. We're going to talk this morning a little bit about parenting, and about some of the lessons we can learn from the life of Eli and his sons.

Let's open our time here in a word of prayer. Lord, thank you for the opportunity to be here today.

I thank you, Lord, for everyone that is here, for just the fact that you have brought us here for this day for a particular reason.

I pray now as we look into your word, and as we sing, and as we worship, and as we fellowship together as a community here, that you would be honored by everything that we say, and you'd be honored by everything that we do.

May we learn from your word, Lord, and may we not only learn, but also apply it to our lives. May we walk away as men and women and families that look more like you.

I ask all this in your name, amen. It's funny, it was

Dave mentioned earlier, I get the opportunity to teach all over the world. I'm the director of our organization, we're called

Tri -Am Global, and what we do is we do pastoral training in about 21 countries around the world.

And I get the opportunity to worship with a lot of pastors in a lot of different countries.

And it's funny, and I've seen a lot of other religions, and how they go about the act of worship.

And it's just so different than a group of believers who follow the living

God. And the hope that we have in a future, the confidence that we can have in his word.

It's been, I don't know about you guys, I've talked with a lot of you guys, and a lot of us are kind of in the same boat where it's just been a crazy time this past maybe month or more.

About a month ago, maybe three and a half weeks ago or so, I was in Mongolia, and I was teaching there for about 10 -11 days.

Which by the way, Mongolia in January and February, don't do that. January was negative 40, it warmed up to negative 8 for me when

I was there. Now coming from Michigan it wasn't as bad as it was for other people, but you know, just spent some time there with those pastors.

And you know, it's funny because to see them group together, we would start our services, we start our teaching times usually with singing a song or two.

And just to see the hope that they have, the gospel has been in Mongolia for years, but the church itself has been there for 32 years is all.

Because prior to that it was under communism, and they were not allowed to meet and regularly meet together and worship like that.

So it's just fun to see that. God moved me, so I was there for 10 -11 days, and then

I was home for a day and a half. I don't normally plan it this way, but that's how it landed. I was home for a day and a half, basically to do my laundry, and then

I took off with my daughter to Ireland. We took off to Costa Rica, where I taught for two more weeks with another group of students at that point.

So I was gone 21 -23 days, something like that, total. And I get home on Saturday night, late, like 10 -11, we landed in,

I think it was Detroit. And then we made it home, and I went to church over at Berean, that's where we attend, and I was pastor for years, associate pastor.

I had a meeting that night, Sunday night, and then I decided, you know, I'm going to work Monday through Thursday, because I've been gone for 20 -some days,

I've got a lot of stuff I've got to catch up on. And I was going to take Friday, Saturday, and Sunday really just to crash.

Well, I worked, coming home from a trip is usually pretty busy, so I'm working 8 -10 hours a day for those four days, trying to catch up on life.

Friday morning, I decided we were going to sleep in, of course I'm just old enough now that I don't sleep in.

I still get up at 6, no matter what, it just happens. So I try to sleep in, I'm up at 6, and by mid -morning we get the phone call from my daughter, who's in Havelock, North Carolina, her husband's stationed at a

Marine base there. Hey, they're going to induce me, starting tonight. Now, I've got a 100 -pound

German Shepherd that needs to find a babysitter, so my afternoon was spent trying to get things lined up to find a babysitter.

We left at 4, I believe it was, 4 or 5 o 'clock in the evening, afternoon, on Friday.

We drove through the night, 14 hours, remember this was my day off, after my busy schedule, 14 hours through the night, we made it into North Carolina, the area where she was at, about 5 .30

or so, and then I spent all day Saturday in the waiting room, and all day

Sunday in the waiting room until my daughter had her baby at 4 .47

in the afternoon. So that was my, let's catch up on life and just relax a little bit time.

We were there for another day or two, and then we headed back home. Then I had a missions conference that we were involved in.

Easter was a down week for us, which is, as you imagine, Easter's usually busy anyways, but was a down week for us.

Then last week, we were at a missions conference as well, and now I'm preaching here, and I was telling,

I think, Rob or Zach, I'm done after today. I have no more speaking engagements for a couple months now, and I'm going to take a deep breath.

Why did I say all that? Well, for a couple reasons. One, I don't know where you're at. You're coming in here.

You've had a busy week. You've had a good week, a bad week. I get it. All right? We're tired.

We just need to all take a deep breath and hear what God's Word has to say. I also wanted to bring up, again, my granddaughter, because why would

I not? You know, it's been interesting. It's been fun. Everybody says it, and now

I get it. Being a grandpa is awesome. All right? Now, we're not worried.

Anyway, she's still a baby at this point, so there's no, like, let the kids do what they want to do sort of thing because she's a baby.

She sleeps. And I did change a few diapers. I will admit that, you know, to help out there.

But the idea of being a grandpa is awesome. And, you know, I will say, you know, when you marry young, when you have kids early, and then your kids marry young, you become a 47 -year -old grandpa, and I'm okay with that.

I'm excited about that, and I love the idea of being a grandpa.

But I also understand that parenting in the world we live in today is different, even than when we had little kids.

Now, my two are here, and we have a 17 - and a 16 -year -old, almost 16 -year -old, still in the house.

I have two daughters that are married and gone. But it's just very different today than even what it was when

I was a kid, and then, of course, when my parents were younger as well. The stuff that we struggle with, the stuff that we deal with is,

I'm not looking forward to the trials and the struggles that my kids are going to have to deal with when it comes to parenting.

You know, we mentioned earlier, I believe, post -pandemic, things have changed.

And parenting is getting to be very, very hard. We deal a lot with more of the mental health and the emotional struggles of all of that.

And I understand that now. I get that. And helping our kids through understanding how to deal with those type of things is hard.

We deal with things like the internet. Now, we had the internet when we were kids. When I was a kid, not kid,

I guess I would have been a high school teenager, really, when the internet was popular, and that was dial -up. And kids, that's like the thing you watch on movies every now and then, where you hear the computer making funny noises.

We didn't have a lot of the internet that we have today. YouTube wasn't really around, let alone social media.

So it's just different now than it was even back then. And I can only imagine, with the breakthroughs in technology that have happened even in the last couple of weeks, what it's going to be like in the years to come.

I really struggle with that. Interestingly enough, bullying, when

I was a kid, was someone on the playground messing with you. But now, because of social media, it's a greater concern.

And again, people struggle, kids can struggle in this whole process. The Bible has a lot to say about parenting, and gives a lot of instruction as well as examples for us to follow.

I asked my kids, and my wife, give me some examples of some parents and kids and examples that we have in Scripture, and we came up with several.

Maybe you can think of some as well, but just without looking at my notes, you've got Abraham and Isaac is an obvious one.

And you have, of course, Abraham's sacrifice, the idea of sacrificing Isaac. You can learn about Isaac's willingness to do what

God wants him to do, and to be used by that, and that whole process. You have Abraham being willing to do that in his worship for the

Lord. You have Isaac, and then you have Jacob and Esau, and that relationship, and that's pretty messed up.

It's not really the greatest example. You have, you can jump ahead, maybe you have

King Saul and his son Jonathan. And Jonathan being David's best friend, King David's best friend, growing up in this process.

And then we're going to have, what I like here is the story of Eli and his sons. I like picking passages that aren't typical passages for us to go through, especially when you're a guest speaker.

You don't want to preach on something that the pastor's been preaching on, usually. And this is a story that is not one that is usually preached through very often.

And what I want to do is I want to walk through some of the passages here, some of these verses. I'm going to add a few more in here in the story that I didn't read earlier, just to get a little context better.

I want to walk through it slowly here, and just walk through the story, and make some comments as we go along.

And then I want to draw maybe two or three areas of application, or at least areas of note that we can make from this passage.

So we're going to begin again. We're going to go back to 1 Samuel 2, and we're going to start in verse 12.

And it says here in verse 12, Now, I'm just going to stop right there.

How would you like to have that be one of the first things to talk to you about you in Scripture? Alright, so this is not a good thing.

He's already setting the stage here, saying that, you know, these sons of Eli, these are not, I'm giving you a bad example here.

He calls them worthless men. And then it says here, They did not know the

Lord. Now, were they worthless men because they did not know the

Lord? Were they worthless men because of what they were doing? As we look at this, it says here,

Now, it was a custom for the priest that when any man offered sacrifice, the priest's servant would come while the meat was boiling, and a three -pronged fork in his hand, and he would thrust it into the pan, or the kettle, or the cauldron, or the pot.

All that the fork brought out, the priest would take for himself, and that's what they did at Shiloh to all of the

Israelites who came there. So, what was customary is, as the people were getting ready to bring their sacrifices to the place of worship, they would bring their meat, they would be boiling it, and cooking it, and so all the fat would be rendering, and you would take a fork, and you'd stick it in, the priest would, or the servants of the priest, they'd pull it out, and anything that was still on that fork, because it would have been loose and tender, anything that pulled out at that point would be what the priest would be able to eat and would be able to have.

And that's the way where the servants of the Lord were being taken care of by the community.

So, it's like, they didn't get a salary, this type of stuff, they were able to be fed, and be able to be taken care of by those types of means.

And that was customary for all the people who worshiped the Lord at this time, and it says here in Shiloh, in this area where they were at, that's what they did as well.

And then it says here, moreover, so now we have a transition here, it says, moreover, before the fat was burned, the priest's servant would come and say to the man who was sacrificing, give me meat for the priest to roast, for he will not accept boiled meat from you, only raw.

Now, as you can imagine, many of you have cooked a roast before, and the idea of, you have cooked meat,

I keep thinking of my wife's roast, or my mother -in -law's roast, and cooked meat just falls apart.

But a raw meat, you kind of stick a fork in it, what's going to happen usually? It's pretty much all going to be coming out here.

There's just not going to be much left. It's like, it's held together, and the whole concept, the whole idea of them getting a portion has now become they're getting an awful lot.

Now he goes on, and he says, in verse 16, if a man says, let them burn the fat, and take as much as you wish, he will say, no, you must give it now, and if not,

I will take it by force. So now we're talking about these servants of the Lord, they're coming in, they're taking this meat, they're sticking the fork in it, it's raw, they're pulling out a lot, if the guy says, hey, let's not, let me cook it first, he's like, no, you're going to let me do this, and if you don't, then

I'm going to take it anyways. So they were abusing the process that was going on.

It says, thus, let's go in verse 17, the sin of the young men was very great in the sight of the

Lord, for the men treated the offering of the Lord with contempt. Now we're talking about primarily these two sons of Eli.

Now what do we know about Eli real quick? I want to make sure we touch on that briefly. We know that Eli, we didn't read it, but in chapter 1 verse 3 or so, you see that Eli is a priest serving in a place called

Shiloh. And this was an area where the Jews would come and they would worship. And we know that from 1

Samuel, the whole idea of 1 Samuel is the bringing upon of Samuel as this prophet.

Samuel in 1 Samuel 1 and in chapter 2, he's going to be born and in chapter 2 he's born, he's given to Eli and to the priesthood to be offered to the

Lord. So they're in this place called Shiloh. We also know, and we'll read later, that in chapter 4 verse 3 the

Ark of the Covenant that we know from the Old Testament was also there. It was also being held in that area.

It doesn't say it, but 1 Samuel, in 1 Samuel in particular, but we can deduct it from 1

Chronicles 24 and 1 Kings 2 verse 27, that Eli was probably a descendant of a guy by the name of Ithmar and Ithmar would have been the youngest son of the priest

Aaron, the brother -in -law of Moses. So you see why

Eli is probably in the position he is because the bloodline in which he is and why he is serving there is because he's probably an ultimate descendant of Aaron.

Interestingly, as you study the life of Eli, Eli is never the main character of the story.

In 1 Samuel 1 and 2, we see the idea of that Hannah is sitting on the steps and she's praying and she wants to have a child.

Eli is a secondary person who comes in and talks to her and addresses to her. Even when

Samuel is born and is given to the Lord, he's given to Eli basically to grow up in this setting,

Eli is a secondary character in this process. He's never really the main character, even though we are going to focus on him a little bit today.

Even now, he is not really the main character. He's the father of Epiphany and Phineas.

Let's take a minute here and we're going to walk through the story. Jumping on down to verse 22 now.

We see Eli talking to his son. 22 to 25. It says, Now Eli was very old.

We're going to talk about that in a few minutes when it talks about him falling over. Eli was very old and he kept hearing all that his sons were doing to all

Israel and how they laid with the women who were serving at the entrance of the tent of meeting.

Eli heard what was going on. He knows what's happening and when it says all that has been happening, we added on now the fact that they were sleeping with the women at the entrance of the temple here.

He's heard about what they were doing, the intimidations that they were giving, the fact that they were eating this meat, and he's like, he's hearing that there is not good report happening here with his kids.

And in verse 23 he says, He's like, they're not saying good things about you guys.

If someone sins against man, God will mediate for him. But if someone sins against the

Lord, who can intercede for him? He's like, if there's a relational issue between you and someone else, then the

Lord intercedes there and you can work with that. But if it's between you and God, who will intercede there? But they would not listen to the voice of their father, for it was the will of the

Lord to put them to death. Eli talks to them.

He addresses the issue. He says, hey, I hear what's going on and it bothers me that this is being spread throughout all of the nation here, and they know what's happening, and it's not a good thing because you're sinning against the

Lord. And he heard them, he confronted them, and yet they did nothing. They totally ignored him, he says, because God, at that point,

God's already made up his mind. He's like, they're going to die for this sin that they are doing.

And it's interesting because you sit there and you say, as we continue to read the story of Eli and what happens,

Eli is serving as a priest. His sons were helping him as well in this process. We know that they were unbelievers.

It says right there at the very beginning. We know that Eli knew what was going on. He did confront them, and yet it appears he kept them continuing to do what they're doing.

He didn't take them out from that. He didn't remove them from that position. They continued to serve still in their sinfulness.

Verse 27 to, I don't know, 30 something. We'll just keep reading.

And there came a man of God to Eli, this is a prophet of some kind, someone who's a mouthpiece of God, and said to him, thus says the

Lord, or thus the Lord has said, did I indeed reveal myself to the house of your father when they were in Egypt subject to the house of Pharaoh?

Did I choose him out of the tribes of Israel to be my priest, to go up to my altar, to burn incense, to wear an ephod before me?

I gave to the house of your father all my offerings by fire from the people of Israel.

He's like, I chose your family, I chose your bloodline to serve as a priest in the act of worship for me.

Verse 29, why then do you scorn my sacrifices and my offerings that I commanded?

And honor your sons above me by fattening yourselves on the choiceless parts of every offering of my people

Israel. So this person, this spokesman, the mouthpiece of God is saying,

God is telling you, why are you choosing your kids, your children, and what they're doing over me?

It says that they're getting fat, they're fattening on the meats. We don't know that Eli was participating in what was going on, but he saw that his complacency here was actually an act of participation.

Therefore, verse 30, the Lord God of Israel declares, I promise, that your house and the house of your fathers should go in and out before me.

But now the Lord declares, far be it from me, for those who honor me

I will honor and for those who despise me shall be lightly esteemed. Behold, the days are coming when

I will cut off your strength and the strength of your father's house so that there will not be an old man in your house.

Then, in distress, you will look on the envious eyes on all the prosperity that shall be bestowed on Israel and there shall not be an old man in your house forever.

This prophet is saying, the promise that God's given you, to become a priest, to have this priestly line, that was a conditional promise.

The condition was that you would honor me, that you would follow my paths, and now you clearly are not doing that and I'm taking that from you.

33, the only one of you whom I shall not cut off from my altar shall be spared to weep his eyes out to grieve his heart, and all the descendants of your household shall die by the sword of men.

He's not telling him a real good thing here. And this shall be, shall come upon your two sons,

Hophni and Phinehas shall be a sign to you. Both of them shall die on the same day and I will rise up for myself a faithful priest who shall do according to what is in my heart and in my mind and I will build him a sure house and he shall go in and out before the anointed forever and everyone who has left in your house shall come to implore him for a piece of silver, for a loaf of bread and shall say, please put me in one of the priest's place that I may eat a morsel of bread.

God says I'm going to remove you from this position I'm going to put someone in here who is faithful, someone in here who will actually do that and as a sign to you and to my judgment, your two sons,

Hophni and Phinehas, the ones that are worthless men, the ones that are causing all these problems they will both die on the same day as a sign.

Now we jump ahead to chapter 4 and we're picking up in verse 10.

Chapter 4, verse 10 and it says, so the Philistines, so what happens here is the

Philistines are circling around they're getting ready to attack and it says, so the Philistines fought and Israel was defeated and they fled and every man to his house and there was a great slaughter for their fell their fell of Israel, 30 ,000 foot soldiers, so it was a terrible defeat for the nation of Israel here and the ark of God was captured and the two sons of Eli, Hophni and Phinehas died.

So God used this battle from the Philistines to not only to take the ark but also to prove what he had said that as a sign your two sons will die at the same time, on the same day.

Then a man of Benjamin ran from the battle line, verse 12, and came to Shiloh the same day with his clothes torn and dirt on his head and when he arrived

Eli was sitting on his seat by the road watching, for his heart trembled for the ark of God and when the man came to the city he told the news and all the city cried out.

When Eli heard the sound of the outcry he said what is this uproar? Then the man hurried and came and told

Eli. Now Eli was 98 years old and his eyes were set so that they could not see.

So Eli was old, he could not see at all and the man said to Eli I am he who has come from the battle

I fled from the battle today and he said how did it go my son? He who brought news answered and said

Israel has fled before the Philistines and there has also been a great defeat among the people.

Your two sons also, Hophni and Phineas are dead and the ark of God was captured.

As soon as he heard mentioned the ark of God Eli fell over backwards from his seat by his side at the gate and his neck was broken his neck was broken and he died for the man was very old and heavy and he had judged

Israel for 40 years. It's interesting, that's the story of Eli and it's not a good story it's not a happy story.

You know his sons died on the same day as was prophesied as was told and when

Eli heard about it it says he fell over, he fell back broke his neck and then he died.

I titled this something along the lines of falling head over heels for your children and it's the idea of ironically

I was explaining this to a Costa Rican friend of mine yesterday and they don't understand American idioms so I had to explain even what that meant.

You see that Eli put his kids at such a higher level of priority, even higher than worshiping the

Lord and in turn it ultimately led towards his downfall. At the end of this passage it says he judged

Israel for 40 years. Eli was in a unique position as well because not only was he the priest he was also a judge that came at the end of the judges.

It's a unique position that's only given here to Eli and we don't ever see it again.

Now there are a couple things I want to bring up here just from the very beginning. I think it's important for us to note.

We're going to look at passes, we're going to talk a little bit about lessons that we can learn but I think even within the culture that we live in today

I think it's important to note that children are a blessing from the Lord and they are not a bother.

That's one thing that I think our culture is telling us today that we see more and more people seeing children to be a distraction, children to be a bother and scripture talks to us many many passages about the blessing that is children and just to name a few here in Psalm 127, 3 and 4 children are a heritage from the

Lord an offspring a reward from Him. You look at the blessing, the heritage that you have in the future is your children.

Verse 4, like arrows in the hands of a warrior are children born in one's youth. I like archery and you look at what does an arrow do in the hands of an archer?

It goes out. It's launched. It's sent. And I think of what as parents and grandparents as parents here we look at it and we go what is our children?

They're these arrows that we have that we rear, that we train them in godliness and then they're sent out. They're sent out into the world to live to thrive, to continue to be a witness to those people around them.

And you see that as part of our role part of our responsibility. Proverbs 6, 17, children children's children are a crown to the aged and parents are the pride of their children.

We have grandchildren now, children's children, being a pride, a crown to them and a pride to their parents.

It's just a blessing and I think it's important for us to start there and to note kids are not a bother.

I love seeing churches with kids and it pains me to see churches without kids because they are and I was a youth pastor and I kind of hate to always hear this, they are the future and they are the church now.

Kids can have a ministry right now here in the church as well as in the next 10 years and in 20 years they'll be sitting in your shoes.

And the older I get the more I see that coming to fruition. And it is important to have a church that has kids.

And by kids I'm talking all ages. It's important to have that and to treat them with the respect and with the priority that they should be in the body of Christ.

So what lessons can we learn from this story? The first lesson

I think it's important for us to learn is that faith is not something that one inherits.

It takes work. Faith is not something that one inherits. It's not something that just because you're a

Christian that means your kids are going to be Christians. It takes work to do that. And you can be born and raised in a

Christian home your whole life and still not have a relationship with God. I had a wonderful childhood.

I had a twin brother. We got in a lot of trouble. I say wonderful. Let's keep that in context. But I had godly parents.

And I know that that's atypical and is a blessing. But I grew up and I came to Christ at an early age in my life.

At four years old my twin brother and I both heard the gospel. It made sense to us at that point in time and I believe

I received Christ as my Savior at that early age. My father was a public school principal.

And it was interesting. I only mention that because I was a pastor and now I'm missionary. My twin brother's a pastor.

My older brother, who's six years older than me, he's a pastor and my sister is also married to a pastor. You'd think my dad was a pastor, but he was a public school principal.

Well, how do you do that? How do you have kids that go into ministry when you yourself are not necessarily in full -time vocational ministry?

You do that by setting an example. You do that by being involved in the church, by putting influences around the kids that show them that ministry is a good thing.

And I feel fortunate that God has given me that opportunity. Deuteronomy 6 -7.

Impress them on your children. These are the statutes and precepts of God. Talk with them about when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up.

Talk about spiritual things at all times. I'm going to come back to that in just a second. Proverbs 22 -6.

Start children off on the way they should go and even when they're old they will not depart from it.

Exodus 20 -12. Honor your father and your mother so that you may live long in the land and the

Lord your God is giving you. Proverbs 1 -8 -9. Listen, my son, to your father's instruction and do not forsake your mother's teaching.

They are a garland to grace on your head and a chain to adorn your neck. You look at the idea of faith not being something that is inherited.

So how do you do it? Number one, you be intentional. You be intentional in how you rear your children.

You have intentional conversations with your kids. We've learned this from, my family did it as well, but Johnny's, my wife, her family, they were just absolutely incredible at this idea.

I won't make you raise your hands, but I was a youth pastor for many years and it amazes me, and maybe you're sitting in the same boat right now, would it be awkward for you to have a good spiritual conversation with your child at any age?

Would it be awkward for you to bring up a theological concept with them and talk to them about that? Or to talk about scripture?

Or to confront them about something spiritually? Does that make you nervous? And some people it does, and that's what amazes me is the amount of people that really just, they kind of get all nervous because now you need to talk to them about something spiritual.

We grew up having spiritual conversations pretty regularly. My wife's family, they grew up having it every single day, and really at the dinner table.

Now, we're going to be done here in a couple minutes here, and we'll go out to lunch and maybe we'll have dinner together as a family or whatever.

And of course, those are ideal prime times to talk about the message, to talk about what God's been teaching you.

But what about tomorrow? What about dinner tomorrow? What about dinner on Thursday? Or Friday?

We have a mantra in our family, it's kind of a little saying that we live by, and it's embrace the awkward. And what

I mean by that, and that's having been in ministry for years, if you have to have an awkward conversation, just have it.

Once you have it, it's not awkward anymore. And it's important that you do, that you take the courage and you do that.

I would encourage you, if it makes you nervous talking to kids, your kids, or even kids here in the church, about spiritual things, just do it.

It's a good thing to have, it's being intentional in helping them learn more about God.

Look for teachable moments. This is something that is not just for parents, although parents, we need to be doing this all the time.

But this is for all of us. Look for teachable moments. How many people enjoy camping?

See, I need to come here. Talk on it. How many people enjoy camping not in a camper?

Oh, see, I do need to come here. This is great. Camping, the outdoors, I love it. I love hunting, fishing, camping,

I love all those type of things. I like them in campers too, don't get me wrong. But camping and backpacking and hiking, there's so many teachable moments that you can have, you can find in nature.

But there are so many teachable moments you can have right here, right now, just living out your everyday life. And the idea is, as a follower of Christ, you need to look for opportunities that you can enter into spiritual conversations with those people who are younger than you.

By using something you've seen around you. Jesus did it all the time. Jesus would stand on the hill, he'd look around, and he'd use an object lesson from something that he saw right there with him.

I used to lead a lot of backpacking trips and stuff like that, canoe trips up into Canada. And I love taking high schoolers out and junior highers out into the wilderness where there's no cell phones, there's no distractions.

And you're just looking for teachable moments about how great God is. And you're explaining to them more and more about God.

You're being intentional in what you're doing by having spiritual conversations and looking for teachable moments.

As parents, we also finally, in our intentionality, we need to be involved in what's going on in their lives, with their friends, with their schools.

Too many times we just walk away. We drop our kids off at school and we walk away and we get them to come back and we figure now it's their time with those guys and we don't know what's going on.

And we have to be intentional with helping our children through situations of life. It's part of what

God's given to us. Be involved in their life. Again, when I talk about being involved in people's lives, that happens here at a church level as well.

My kids have had the wonderful blessing of being discipled by not only my wife and I, but by people in our church. People in our church have come to our kids over the years and said, hey,

I'd like to pour a little bit into your life, would you mind meeting with me for a cup of coffee? And they take them out and they talk about spiritual things.

And as a dad, and as a former pastor, and as a missionary, that is so encouraging. To see someone else speaking truth into their life, to help them understand and know

God better, at a deeper level. And it's showing that someone in your church actually cares about you.

I'd encourage you to think about that. Who do you know that you could pour into? Be intentional.

Another one. Be consistent as parents. We need to be consistent.

You need to establish rules and then you need to stick to them as parents. We need to show them discipline or consequences, but we need to do that with love.

We need to show them that there are consequences to the actions, absolutely. But it doesn't mean that I still don't love you.

It doesn't mean that we still don't care. We need to learn as parents and as people in a church, we need to learn about forgiveness.

God forgave me of all of my sins. And as kids grow up, they're going to make mistakes and we need to learn to work with them and to forgive them as well.

Two more here. Or one more here on this one. Be an example. Be an example to your kids.

My father, I mentioned, was a public school principal. It's funny. My dad would stand in the hall.

I loved my dad being my principal. It didn't bother me a bit. I really didn't. I enjoyed my father.

He was a great man. Everybody loved him. He would stand in the hall. He'd lean up against the wall here as the kids are all walking through the hall.

And he'd just stand like this. And he would watch, of course, as the principal does. He'd just kind of watch what's going on.

And several years ago, I think it was a wedding. I say wedding or funeral because we were all together as a family.

I think it was a wedding, though. Someone pointed out, I think they even took a picture. My twin brother,

Joe, and my older brother, Steve, and I were all standing, watching what was going on. We're all standing on the wall. All three of us in the principal's stance is what we call it.

Just kind of observing what's happening. Now, why did we do that? We've learned it over the years, watching my dad's example.

Our kids are watching us. They're following what you do. They're learning from your example.

Here at this church, people are watching you. They're following your example. You need to be an example that you want them to follow.

Church attendance, is it important to you? Being involved in ministry, is that important to you?

It is to God. Do they see you excited about church, about spiritual things, about people coming to Christ, about sharing your faith?

Your kids will sense and will feel and will get your excitement when you are excited about things.

They'll see that, and it builds momentum within your family. Finally, God does not want anything to be higher than Him.

One of the lessons we learn here from the story of Eli, Eli had his sons, put his sons at a higher priority than worshiping the

Lord. God doesn't want anything to be higher than that. Here's the crazy thing is, my family, it's a pretty important thing for me.

I love my family, and it's a good thing. But do they know, do I love my wife more than I love

God? Do I love my kids more than I love God? I mean, this shows us right here, that the example that is to be set is

God first, then family. Now how do they, how do you do that as a parent, or as a husband or a wife?

How do you do that in a way that doesn't, isn't rude, that isn't saying, you know,

I don't love you? Well, you do that by being excited, I think. I think you do that by showing them your passion for the

Lord. And I want them to know that I love them dearly. I love, okay, so it was like my wife, my kids, it was

God, my wife, my kids, now my granddaughters kind of creeping in there. I still love my wife most of all, but, you know,

I love my kids too, but you got a grandkid now. Grandparents understand. You look at this and you go, there is a priority that we have.

And when I'm excited about life and ministry, and excited about what God has been doing in other people's lives, your kids sense that, they understand, and they know the priority, they know the importance that God has in our lives.

I said finally, but let me give you one more. Sin has consequences. Sin has consequences.

Eli's sons, they were sinning openly, blatantly, and there was a consequence, and that consequence was so very severe for Eli and for his family.

His sons died. His lineage is being cut off at this point in time. There's going to be no old men in his lineage.

And Eli not only lost his life over this, he loses his life, his ministry, he loses everything because of the sin of complacency when it came to his children.

Sin has consequences. That's why we discipline our children. We show them now a little discomfort now, when they're younger, to save a lot of discomfort in the future when they feel the harsher consequences of their actions.

I want to end this here. We see that the sad story of Eli is a story of a father who loved his children more than he loved

God. He was permissive in their sin and in their disobedience, and ultimately it cost him everything.

Parents, we have a role to play, and that role is parent. We need to parent our children.

Be intentional. Be consistent. Be the example. Church, we have a role to play as well.

And that role is to be the church, to build one another up, to encourage one another, to help one another.

Instead of being critical, as you see parents and kids, be intentional.

Be helpful. We need to approach one another with love, with forgiveness, with grace, and with mercy.

We need to be people who help parents and help kids in the body of Christ.

We all have a role that we need to play. We're going to transition now into communion.

And if you're here today and you have a relationship with Jesus Christ, and you have a desire to grow in Him, we would like for you to participate in this time of communion.

The whole idea of communion is a picture of God the

Father who gave His Son for you and I. And the fact that He, Christ, willingly went to the cross for our sins.

He died, He was buried, and He rose from the dead. In Matthew 26, verse 26 to 29,

Jesus says, as it says, Now as they were eating, Jesus took the bread, and after blessing it and broke it,

He gave it to the disciples and said, Take, eat, this is my body. And He took the cup. When He had given thanks,

He gave it to them, saying, Drink of it, all of you. For this is my blood of the covenant, which is poured out for many for the forgiveness of sins.

I tell you, I will not drink again of this fruit of the vine until the day when I drink it new with you in my

Father's kingdom. After we pray, we would ask, while Dave is playing, to participate in communion.

There's tables over in the four corners for you to go to whichever one's closest to you.

There's also two in the very back in the middle. Let's pray. Lord, Lord, I thank

You for today, for the opportunity to participate in this ordinance of the church,

Lord. The fact that You sacrificially gave Your Son for us, that You give us the ability now to live a life that overcomes death, that You give us the spirit in our lives to help us as we go throughout our days as parents, as kids, as members of the church.

We have You in our lives to help us and to grow us. Lord, we think of the life of Eli.

We think of the idea of parenting and the hard task that that is in the world today.

But we know that Your Word talks about that, gives us examples. Help us to apply these now to our lives.

May we be intentional in our conversations with our kids, with those around us. May we be the example for other people to follow,