TLP 351: Linguistic Theft | Hillary Morgan Ferrer Interview, Part 2

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00:00

I always told the teenage boys I worked with not to be too impressed when a girl said they were cute Because a girl will call a puppy cute.

00:08

They will call an old man cute Oh, we will totally call an old man cute Which is what I'm saying, so it doesn't mean anything when the girl calls them cute

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Or even those dogs that are so ugly that they're cute So yeah, it doesn't always mean what you hope it means No, it doesn't

00:21

Welcome to Truth. Love. Parents. Where we use God's word to become intentional, premeditated parents

00:30

Here's your host, A .M. Brewster If you were with us last time, then you were introduced to Hilary Morgan Ferrer Of course, if you started listening to the

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Mama Bear Apologetics, you probably knew about her way before you ever knew about me So really, in a way, I don't have to introduce her

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But I'll give her a chance to tell a little bit about herself, who she is, and her ministry And then we will dive into today's show, which is the second part of our interview from last time

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So make sure you also check that one out But before we do that, I want to thank everyone who participated in our book giveaway for Natasha Crane We literally tossed everyone's names into a hat and drew out the following two people

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Who will be receiving a free copy of Talking With Your Kids About Jesus Congratulations, Laini Gleiser and Amanda Herb We will be connecting with you soon on social media to get the final details

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So we can get those books into your hands Now for those of you who didn't win, it's not a problem The book has gone on sale today

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Just head over to Amazon using our affiliate links and purchase the book It will be well worth it

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And don't forget that we have another book giveaway going on right now With Hilary Morgan Ferrer's book,

01:34

Mama Bear Apologetics Empowering Your Kids to Challenge Cultural Lies Head over to TruthLoveParent .com

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forward slash giveaways To learn how you can earn three chances to win that book We'll be announcing two winners this

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Friday And I hope you win Hilary, thank you so much for being back How are the hiccups?

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Are you okay? Well, same as they were since fifth grade Just random and just obtrusive

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Why don't you tell us a little bit about yourself and your ministry? So my name is

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Hilary Ferrer My husband is John Ferrer And he was doing formal apologetics ministry before I even was

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And my kind of specialty, I was a science teacher And so I wanted to go back and get an advanced degree in science

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Specifically biology so that I could really speak into A lot of the questions that I saw coming out with students

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In the sciences, especially in regards to faith And so, but then the Lord really called me into I guess a more roundabout apologetics ministry in general

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When he kind of started placing just the phrase Mama Bear Apologetics on my heart And realized that, you know what?

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Women will stand up and learn stuff That they wouldn't necessarily do for themselves

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But when they see that it's going to take their children down Suddenly they become a whole different beast And they will rise up And they will teach themselves apologetics

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Because they are saying, not my kids, not today And I thought that that would be a really good instinct to harness

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So that's kind of where Mama Bear Apologetics came from Yeah, this is nothing compared to getting an advanced degree in biology

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But I actually read the Harry Potter series My motivation at the beginning was one reason and one reason only

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People were saying, Christians in particular were saying So many bad things about it It's demonic, it's witchcraft, all that kind of stuff

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And I couldn't speak intelligently into it So I thought, well, I'll study it, I'll read it So that I can speak intelligently

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And I think really that's what we talked about last time And what we're talking about this time That's kind of the invitation

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The invitation is to you parents, all of us To take that extra step, to study To know what the world is saying

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Know what's out there Know what our kids are hearing And then be able to intelligently respond to it

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Yeah Alright, so last time we talked about the book Mama Bear Apologetics Empowering your kids to challenge cultural lies

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And I mentioned that we were going to be having a giveaway A contest, a competition So that you could win a copy of the book

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If you want to know how to do that You can stick to the end of this show Or you can listen to the end of our last show

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To find out how you can win that book There are three different ways to get your name into the drawing I hope you'll do all of those

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Today though, we're not going to talk about the book in general We're going to look specifically at chapter 4 Now, I mentioned last time that the book is broken up I've got my book here in front of me

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I always like the guys on the radio You can hear them rustling their pages I never do that, so this is my page rustling

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The book is broken up into two parts The first part is really laying a foundation For what it means to be a mama

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Or a papa bear And the second book is dealing specifically with all the isms The lies that Part two is lies you've probably heard

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But didn't know what they were called So they tell us what the lies are They tell us what they're called

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And they help us to learn how to equip our kids To reject those lies To challenge those beliefs

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Those worldviews So the first four chapters of the book are these First is calling all mama bears

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And I love their subtitles You have to get the book for so many awesome reasons But you'll smile every time you read the subtitles

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The very first subtitle is My kid has a cheerio shoved up his nose Why am

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I reading this book? And that is so beautiful I love that The second chapter is

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Taken from an actual mama bear conversation I have to say I think this was Hillary Short's contribution

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Oh my word If you ever want to find yourself saying ridiculous things Just have children

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Oh my goodness And then the second chapter is How to be a mama bear Which their subtitle is

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Is this code for being the weirdest mom on the playground? Third chapter is The discerning mama bear

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And then the fourth chapter is called Linguistic theft I love that terminology

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I've been trying to I've been calling it different things And when I found that That's the term

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I'm going to use from now on Linguistic theft That perfectly describes what is going on in our society today

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We're going to kind of dig into The chapter a little bit And discuss this Because I want to have a couple more episodes after this

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Where we the TLP family are talking about The importance of Our family vocabularies

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The importance of what we say How we speak Not just the tone of voices and things like that Not just being kind and loving and gracious But literally what we mean when we say the words that we mean

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So this is an awesome way to Segway into that conversation I appreciate you taking the time to do this with us

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But to you, succinctly What is linguistic theft? So linguistic theft

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Is when people have taken words That have traditional meanings And literally changed the meaning

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And specifically for the terms we're talking about in this book They change the meaning And then they put it back

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On say Christians And say well your god says That he's love and this is what love means

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Or your god says to Be in unity and we're going to decide So it's taking these

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Christian ideas And words, changing the definition And then placing them on us as if we're required

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To obey the new definition Instead of the definition As it was understood when the bible was originally written

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But I mean this can go Not just with Christian stuff This is going in all sorts of different directions right now

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That words are just losing their meaning Left and right and that is how propaganda Is being used That if you can just define assault

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However you want Well then yes everybody got assaulted Or if you can define gender however you want

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Then yes your march for women Can include anyone who wants to be a woman All of these things are words that have meaning

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But if you take the meaning away Then all of a sudden you can actually change The identity of the cause that you're supporting

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And that's concerning Yeah I love the way that you summarize that We're going to talk more about some of the words

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That are commonly stolen From our language But I want to pinpoint one of them

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Just as an example here at the very beginning You used the word gender For the longest time the word gender

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Didn't have anything to do with a person's sex They were completely different terms

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In fact the word gender was never used To apply to a human It was a word that was used of linguistics

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For example if you're studying a language You would talk about the gender of a word Right That's the only time gender was used

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But here's the interesting thing Now this is a personal opinion I don't know that it's 100 % true But I think that the word gender

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Came to be used as a substitute Originally for the word sex Because Christians and even the world

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At large at the time Didn't like using the word sex So the word gender seemed like a really decent

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Substitute and so they started using the word gender Gender started to become A substitute for the word sex

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Which it never was And nowadays it's gone beyond that It is now seen as separated out

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It's not a substitute for the word sex It's something completely different But it's been filled with all this brand new meaning

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Within the past few years that it never ever ever had And if we don't understand all this

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Then we don't know what gender means We don't know what it's supposed to mean We don't know what people mean when they say it So that's an example of this

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Of a way that the world Takes a word and redefines it Yeah I'd like to see more history on that actually

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Because I just kind of assumed That it was for the most part synonymous Because there were going to be 6th grade teachers

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You know There have always been 6th grade teachers Shall we say Trying to talk about the concept of sex and gender

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To a bunch of 6th graders It's like you get the hee hee hee You know giggles or something So I always figured it was just a way

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To get rid of the word sex Because the word sex obviously had two very different meanings

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Biological sex and the act of sex Exactly So I thought that's what ruined it But I'd be interested to see your research

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On that When it was just used for So when he's talking about language

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He's talking about how in Spanish You have el and la And it's going to be a masculine or feminine word

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We don't have that in the English for the most part But basically every other of the romance languages do

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Yep So let's look at different categories In the book I want to look at three in particular

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As we talk about linguistic theft today First one is the nature Of linguistic theft

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Then the consequences Of linguistic theft And then we kind of want to Finalize this discussion

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Really asking how can we fight back And I like the way it's put in the book How can I fight back without being a jerk

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We're talking about a fight here A war Challenging things

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Apologists are often times unfortunately negatively seen As being people who are just super argumentative So we need to understand what it is

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We need to understand what it's doing to us and our families And we need to understand how we can address it

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So let's start with the nature of linguistic theft Where do we go When it comes to understanding this concept

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Really wrapping our brains around it Well I think we need to know that it's happened in the first place I think a lot of times

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Who was I believe it's Voltaire Was credited with saying If you wish to converse with me

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First define your terms That even when I was early In our marriage

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With John We would have these I won't call them knock down drag outs For us they were basically us debating back and forth

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Very different than other people's But it would usually come around to We were actually talking about the same thing

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But we were using different words for it And so when we finally figured out That we were referring to the same thing Oh okay the argument's over We actually agree

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We thought we disagreed but we didn't So I think I think just knowing

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That this substitution For words has happened in the first place If you think that words

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Just have always meant the same thing Or there's just a natural evolution of language I mean there is a natural evolution

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Of language but not to the extent That we're seeing We're seeing people purposely changing words

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And changing the definitions And I like how Holly Ordway says That once language becomes routinely distorted

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It becomes increasingly easy To justify and promote evil While at the same time

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Hiding behind positive words If you were to even look At the book

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Have you ever heard of Rules for Radicals? It's this book on basically How to be a community organizer

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And when I say community organizer I mean kind of the Obama Chicago Saul Alinsky type community organizer

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And one of their tactics Whatever political thing you want to do You have to phrase it in moral terms

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So you have to turn this into a moral imperative And so they'll take some kind of moral word

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And then cram it into the situation And then say We're fighting for justice We're fighting for equality

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Which justice and equality Are two of the words that we talk about In linguistic theft Yeah sounds great

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Who's going to be like boo justice boo equality I hate that stuff No one's going to say that So it's like you have to hide things behind their words

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And one of the things I just gave a talk at the Women in Apologetics Conference And leading up to my talk

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I was going to be kind of Doing an intro to the Mama Bear book But I became really convinced About this concept of identity

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That I would say identity Is probably one of the biggest Battlefield, battlegrounds

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In our society right now And what happens is you have to have two things In order to have a correct identity You have to have the concept of truth

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Something that's actually true You can't have a true identity without the concept of truth But in order to convey an identity

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You need words So we've got truth and words All both pointing to this identity here

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And if we topple either of those Then we're going to be completely confused About identity

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And so I think that society Has attacked the concept of truth Over and over and over again

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There is no the truth, there's my truth And his truth But now they're also taking on the concept of words

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That you can't even talk about a true identity Because they're changing the words And I also thought back

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If we want to just take this Where does this Pull the thread, where all does it go And that Jesus Christ Is called the

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Logos He is the word So if society really wants to attack Christ himself

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They are going to attack words That is in some ways His identity from John 1

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In the beginning was the word And the word was with God And the word was

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God So no surprise that we're seeing an attack on words So how do we start We have to recognize this attack

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First and foremost And Satan's been doing this since the beginning too He started by trying to reinterpret

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God's words Questioning God's words And that's what led to where we are today

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One thing that you mention in the book Is that words in general Are being commandeered

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To promote lies But Christian words, our Christian virtues Our Christian concepts are also being kidnapped

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It's not just justice and equality It's specifically biblical stuff And one thing that I read recently I can't cite it right now,

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I wish I could Is the fact that a broader and broader group Of individuals are starting to use the phrase

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Born again Oh my gosh, I haven't heard that That's totally a bible thing Jesus said to Nicodemus, you need to be born again

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But people are going, hey we really like the way that sounds And they're using it to describe themselves When they would never call themselves a biblical

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Christian So it's happening It's happening all over the place Yeah, I've seen the same thing happen with the concept of gospel

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That basically Anything that produces kind of warm happy feelings Is the gospel

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And we're here to bring unity And service It's like they're basically redefining gospel

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To just be unity and service And that's, I mean those are good things Those are part of acting out the gospel

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And showing the power of the gospel But that's not the gospel Yep I'm part of Natasha Crane's launch team

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For her upcoming book Talking with your kids about Jesus And I just read a chapter that was talking about The confusion that people have when it comes to the word

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Judgment Like passing judgment on something To judge someone Because they're saying, you know, you Christian You're not supposed to judge

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Or we're not supposed to judge And the Bible does say that But it comes down to an understanding Of what the

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Bible means when it says that And one thing I think that's super missing in this discussion And we don't really have time to dig

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Go down this rabbit hole too far Is the fact that oftentimes the same English word Is used to translate to different Greek words

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Or whatever the source language was And because our language maybe isn't as broad

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Or doesn't have the same depth as the other language And so we read it and we see one passage says Don't judge

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But another passage basically tells us That we should be judging Yeah, judge rightly is what it says that we're supposed to do

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You are to judge rightly Exactly And these ideas just totally get kidnapped

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Because people think that they know what it means And they've packed their own meaning into it Man, there's so many things that come

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Just from the... You think about what happened at Babel The Lord said I'm going to confuse them And I had the same problem going through My Old Testament class

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We were asking which part of the Old Law Is applicable for New Testament Christians And I was like How in the world are we supposed to know

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Because there was like I think up to 12 different words Used for the different types of law

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In the Old Testament And there was two as far as I could tell In the Greek And so there was no way to distinguish

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Between these different things You just had one word And I think when it goes from even Greek Into English It's like it pairs down even more

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Kind of like the concept of love I think there's a total of six different definitions In the Greek for love Most people are just not familiar with the four

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And we've got one word That describes how I feel about pudding And how I feel about my husband That's a problem

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I always told the teenage boys I worked with at Victory Academy Not to be too impressed when a girl said they were cute

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Because a girl will call a puppy cute They will call an old man cute

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We will totally call an old man cute This is what I'm saying So it doesn't mean anything Or even those dogs that are so ugly

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That they're cute It doesn't always mean what you hope it means And a friend of mine, Mark Massey The director there

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He would say I love my wife but I also love pizza

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And it doesn't end too well for the pizza So what in the world So what we're talking about here

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These confusing things Destroying pizza Or destroying people the way I destroy pizza And being called cute like an old man

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May be some of the silly consequences of linguistic theft But what are some of the serious ones Like when the world has sneaked in And stolen our family's vocabulary

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Basically in a way When we give our family vocabulary to the world To allow them to define the words

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And then we start using it the way the world says What are some of the consequences that happen in our homes? Yes I think that probably one of the largest concepts

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In Christianity Is God's identity as love And we are told God is love

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And we are to love others And our two greatest commandments Are loving the Lord our God And loving others as ourselves

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And this is a foundation of Christianity So when the world takes the word love

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And they say that it means Feelings of comfort Or accepting

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Everything about somebody Or sexual attraction Romance Yes, sexual attraction, calling something true

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All these different things And it's like we can't just look at How do we define love But what do we define as unloving

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And if you make someone uncomfortable That's unloving If you make someone feel judged Whether or not you're judging them or not

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If they even feel judged You have objectively done something unloving And so they can look to our kids and say

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Your God says to love people Why are you disobeying your God And the child is going to go Oh, I didn't know

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And they're going to try to rectify the situation Because we don't want to be jerks We don't want to make people uncomfortable

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We don't want to hurt people's feelings So if society keeps telling us That what we're doing is hurting them

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Then we're going to try to change that But it's all based on this bogus definition of love They can convince us that we're actually

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Following scripture By affirming Maybe a certain sin

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Or by affirming I don't know, just different things And that's the definition of love

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You have to affirm all these things Call them equally true In order to love And that's a problem for our kids

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Who have only been shown a felt board That says God is love That's right

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So Hilary, in the book One of the consequences of linguistic theft Is that it stops a discussion in its tracks

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What do you mean by that? Well, I'll say it stops a normal discussion in its tracks You try to pull this on my husband

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It does not work But he has had guys actually ask him Why do you hate women?

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And because It's like, wait, huh? Probably because he's talking about He's very passionate about pro -life

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Apologetics And so if he's arguing for the cause for the unborn They're turning that into You hate women

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Because you don't want them to be able to make choices So they've taken that word hate And instead of it meaning that you have

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Ill feelings and you're wanting To, I don't know The worst for somebody

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It's like, that's a really loaded question To say, why do you hate women? Right there

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Most people would not know how to answer that You stumble all of yourself

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And you could immediately try to I don't hate women But then you can't really say anything Because if you say what you were saying before They're just going to come back and say, well, why do you hate women?

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Yeah, but you'll also see it with them saying Why are you content with injustice? Why are you content with oppression?

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Why are you okay with oppression taking place Right before your nose? Because they have defined what oppression is

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Or they've defined what justice is Or they've defined what equality is And they've accused you of being the opposite And so, basically

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You can't You can't answer the question, really Without it Without having to first back up But when it backs up, then it's like, oh

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If you try to actually define the word I think you mentioned before, oh, she's all fancy She's using the dictionary now

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As if that's a bad thing And good grief, it's like, okay, let's define these words But a lot of times, people will get so Caught off guard by being called

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That they'll try to defend their character And say, oh, no, I'm not like that Well, why are you arguing as if you were?

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And this is an important thing to remember With our kids You have the opportunity, especially in the home

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Before the conversation Becomes totally derailed To say, oh, that's interesting

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What do you mean by that? They're spouting off something Natasha mentioned in her new book

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She mentioned an example of her daughter Yelling out that she doesn't Want to be judged anymore

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And one of the things that she needed to do was Wouldn't we all love that? Don't judge me anymore

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What exactly do you mean by judge? You never want to be criticized again? You never want somebody to pass it?

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You don't want to have your head put on the guillotine? Okay, I respect that So we need to think about this

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When we're starting with our kids And you mentioned something earlier I wanted to jump in and say it This is just super empowering

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When you just start a conversation with these words What do you mean by that? I have to do this all the time in my counseling

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Somebody uses a word, it might be a Bible word But I have to ask, what do you mean by that?

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Otherwise we can't have a conversation Another thing you say Is that linguistic theft compels people

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To act without thinking Through the issues What does that look like? Specifically in the context of a home, what's that going to do?

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Well, there's certain things That elicit a knee -jerk reaction Because they should So if someone is being abused

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That should be stopped right away However If you redefine abuse To be this whole umbrella term

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That includes all sorts of stuff Or just Spiritual abuse is a good one

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People are saying that because my parents Took me to church and prayed with me That I was spiritually abused

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Oh yeah, and I think there was somebody I can't remember what school it was from Where he preached on I think it was 1

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Corinthians 13 Oh I know, it was the guy from Piper Not John Piper, Everett Piper Back when he was,

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I think, a provost Or dean at Oklahoma Wesleyan University That someone Came and basically said that they felt

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Maybe that they felt judged Or something from a chapel on 1 Corinthians 13 They had no concept

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Of, he's like, do you mean you felt convicted? Are you saying that you don't love people well enough? And they were like, don't put your hate on me

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Kind of thing As if the bad feeling that they had inside When they realized that they weren't loving people Since it was an uncomfortable feeling

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Well obviously it's because he's judging And he's speaking something wrong And so therefore I need to tell him

24:58

That he's offended me For talking about love And he let that fly for about 2 seconds

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And then wrote the book Not a Daycare To describe This is how our school is going to be run

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So I appreciate him for that I think we recommend that actually at the end of the book Another thing you say

25:16

Is that, and I think we've touched on this But linguistic theft blurs the details You know, it just makes it hard To have an intelligent, erudite conversation

25:24

With somebody Because you really don't know what anyone's talking about This happens enough with our kids as it is

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You know, children as they're learning to speak I love my kids are constantly Making up words And I'm constantly having to do the mental gymnastics

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Of figuring out what they really meant But this linguistic theft blurs the details even further Because who knows what the person's really saying

25:45

Yeah, you're just packaging You're packaging assumptions Into a word to describe what happened

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Like, um I think, who was it I think it was Jay Richards with Discovery Institute Wrote an article for the

25:57

Atlantic Like 10 years ago It was something along the lines of how you can tell When an agenda is being put into something

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And one of his things was It is an umbrella for multiple things So he was using Some of the environmental stuff

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But I would say a good example If you go onto the Mama Bear website And you look There's a blog titled

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So you marched for women this weekend Here's 8 things you probably didn't know you were marching for And it was this umbrella term

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Of marching for women And if you went out and asked people What they were marching for They were all like, well, for women

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Well, what does that mean? What exactly for women? And if you looked at the organizer's own document

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It was everything from the Dakota Pipeline To More rights for sex workers

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Not to help get people out of sex work But to Protect their rights

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In some way I mean, as if being in sex work Isn't just giving away your rights That we're trying to protect you from And gun control

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And all these different things But if you could smuggle it under one phrase Of march for women

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Then you blur all these details Of what people are saying you're marching for And then you can go out and say We had this many million of people

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Marching against gun stuff Because that was in your stated document Which no one took time to read

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So that would be an example of linguistic theft Being used to blur the details And that leads clearly into this next concept

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Linguistic theft vilifies The opposing viewpoint Because if you stand against If you stand against over 50 %

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Of what's in that document Then they can say Well you clearly don't love women You don't stand for women

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You hate women Because you can just take it And it gives me the opportunity I mean children do this all the time

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We'll have to give them a consequence Or talk to them It's cliche for them to go You hate me, you don't understand me

27:53

You become the villain Simply because of a misunderstanding Or a deliberate misunderstanding

27:59

In our terminology Yeah well I mean just think about the pro -choice Versus pro -life

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They're both kind of using That tactic of Oh we're pro -life

28:09

Are you saying the other side is anti -life Or the people that are saying pro -choice As if we're anti -choice

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Like no I don't like people making decisions They're not saying which choice this is

28:21

Pro -life is pretty clear Because we are pro -life We're fighting for the unborn Pro -choice, there's a lot of choices

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That we are not allowed to make You know what this should not be a shock We are not allowed to do everything we want with our bodies

28:33

You will get a ticket if you don't have your seatbelt on You are not allowed the choice Whether or not to wear your seatbelt

28:39

You are told to wear your seatbelt So choice isn't the actual issue But they're going to make the issue

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Just because of this one particular choice But if you're against it You're anti -choice That also ties into this next one

28:54

They've also stopped calling us pro -life They started calling us anti -abortion That's the next consequence of linguistic theft

29:01

Is that it turns a negative Into a positive Or vice versa They can do whatever they want with that I think the example

29:09

I gave in the book Is kind of what we talked about earlier About how the word gospel is being taken

29:14

And the word sin There was this one ministry that would not use the word sin

29:19

And when they were asked Why aren't you using the word sin They said we're going to speak up for love

29:26

And I can't remember what the other thing was Basically we're going to shout the love of Christ Louder from all the rooftops

29:32

And we won't back down Shouting our cause of love Okay so What they're doing is they're answering

29:39

As if we're saying no Don't shout love The person was just asking

29:44

Why aren't you discussing sin And the refusal to talk about sin Was then equated with shouting love from the rooftops of Christ And they weren't going to back down From shouting his radical love

29:53

And it's so easy to do it It's so easy to not engage with the actual topic at hand

29:59

But just to kind of throw up a straw man Or to come in And to change the subject

30:05

Is basically what they're doing Yes it's changing the subject And we're going to have lots of examples of this

30:11

We're coming into political season here Oh my So we're going to be dealing with people

30:16

Who are really good at this So if you just kind of listen to how They evade questions And turn whatever

30:24

It is that they're against Into being for something else And oh if you're going to fault me For being pro this

30:31

Well then count me guilty You also find a lot of good examples

30:36

In the book If you haven't gotten the book yet You definitely need to do that Maybe you're trying to win it In our competition And I'll tell you a little bit more

30:42

About how you can do that in a minute But this book is fantastic And I'll say this too If you go to truthloveparent .com

30:48

Under our suggested books You can find Mama Bear Apologetics And with our Amazon affiliate link

30:54

So if you actually purchase the book With that link Then a couple things will happen One you'll have the book

30:59

And you'll be that much better off Because of it Well if you read it and actually follow What it says Two you'll be a blessing

31:05

To Mama Bear Apologetics And three it actually helps Truthloveparent Because as an Amazon affiliate Amazon will give us some money

31:12

Because you bought the book With our link So that's pretty cool But some examples of the book From the book of Linguistic Theft We've talked about a lot of these

31:19

Love, truth, marriage, male vs female Tolerance, justice and equality

31:25

What it means to be a bigot What it means to be authentic Oh my word No one knows what that means anymore

31:33

That's actually something Church has imposed on itself Even people out in the world

31:39

They probably wouldn't even understand it That's where churches Have done their own linguistic theft

31:44

I think I'd throw into this list We don't have to discuss them in detail

31:50

But we need to be thinking about this We talked about gender But we haven't discussed

31:55

The whole concept of using an incorrect pronoun To refer to somebody That's an idea of linguistic theft

32:01

But I also think that a lot of the mental health Jargon out there Is a form of this linguistic theft

32:06

God refers to that part of our being As our spirit And the mental health world

32:14

Doesn't believe in the spirit They believe that we're completely biological And so they're going to look at the idea of our minds

32:20

From a very different perspective And we've allowed them to do that And I think the church has hurt a lot because of that So we see what it is

32:28

We see the huge consequences And no doubt as you've been listening You're like yeah you know what There's been a lot of this going on in our home

32:34

Either we as a family are using the wrong ideas Or I found myself on one side of an issue

32:41

And my child on the other side of the issue Conversations have been derailed We've been vilified

32:47

So how do we fight back And specifically Because truth in love

32:52

How do we fight back without being a jerk Well I think just Again kind of teaching

32:58

The biblical definitions of things So looking at justice If we know that things are attributes of God Then let's look at some of the examples

33:07

Of God acting in justice Or God acting in love Or God acting in mercy or compassion

33:13

And just kind of look at How God really Shows those qualities

33:19

And what we can learn about What that actual definition is I'd also recommend going back to older Older dictionaries

33:27

To see how they have been defined In the past before Agendas have crept in And kind of helping kids to identify buzzwords

33:35

Because I think Whenever someone says something That you're like that's not quite right But I can't quite put my finger on it

33:42

I think a lot of times that's a clue That you have something that's been stolen there There's some buzzword that's been used

33:48

And it's how do you know the princess bride I do not think that means what you think it means So that's kind of a clue

33:54

And I've heard a lot of women Or just people in general When they read this book They said there were so many things

34:01

That I couldn't put my finger on But now I can, I can identify it It's like they knew it was there

34:06

But they just didn't know what it was And just deciding to be salt and light It's one of those things

34:11

Where you kind of have to own What our role is as Christians As I was writing this chapter

34:18

I was thinking about salt and light We did a study on that in my church A couple years back

34:23

And how both of those have Both a helpful

34:28

And an irritating quality to them Salt was helpful for Seasoning meat

34:34

And keeping it from decaying And we're called to be the salt of the world But you put salt in someone's eye

34:40

Or like me if you accidentally get salt Or in my case lemon juice on your fingers And you forget to wash your hands

34:45

Before you take out your contacts So that is not comfortable

34:51

So we have to kind of embrace The idea that sometimes If we're pointing out something that is wrong

34:57

It's going to be an uncomfortable situation Same thing with light Nobody likes to have light in their face

35:02

When they've been in the dark But there's a way to do it To where you're not just barging in On someone in the dark

35:09

And waving a flashlight in their face That would fall under the Fighting back and being a jerk category

35:16

You kind of need to just Lead people along And ask them questions To where they kind of figure out

35:22

Maybe I have changed that definition Or maybe we're defining this thing In two different ways

35:28

And it doesn't have to be this big battle It's more like a learning experience Where you keep things conversational

35:33

And just kind of ask honest questions And you can't ask them as if it's a leading question Like what do you mean by that?

35:40

There's a way to ask a question Where it's not really a question Personally I think this is a little bit easier for women

35:46

Because I think it's easier for us to play dumb And not really have it count against us So I have this thing where sometimes

35:52

I'll twirl my hair And be like I'm not sure I understand that Can you explain that to me? And it can be really non -confrontational

36:01

And I'm like yay It's good to be a woman So you know Just doing some of these things without being obnoxious

36:07

I think Yeah I can't do the whole hair twirl thing Yeah you can't but I can I can stroke their goatee though Explain that a little bit more

36:16

What do you mean by that? Let's recap These ways These four ways of fighting back without being a jerk

36:23

Because I think they're super important First of all And the big one is know the biblical definitions

36:29

We here at Truth Love Parent And I know that Mama Bears try to do it as well We try to help you guys with this We have a whole multi -part series

36:35

On what biblical love is Where we look at the Greek words What Jesus meant when he said agape

36:41

Or what he meant when he said phileo And all these words are translated love in our bibles

36:46

You need to know the biblical definitions We did an episode called 10 things parents are supposed to hate

36:53

And biblically speaking It is not wrong to hate something To draw a line in the sand

36:59

And say Man is that unpopular to say though Oh I know it is unpopular How much hate mail did you get from that? You know

37:05

I didn't get any Which means I don't have that many listeners Or that all the right people were listening Oh my word

37:12

But we have to know biblical definitions And we are going to talk more about that In the upcoming episodes

37:17

Also teach your kids to identify the buzz words You really do have to know What the world is saying

37:23

You've got to understand what they mean With all of their various pronouns I think it is interesting

37:30

People are stopping the terms latino And latina And I actually don't even know what the pronunciation is

37:36

Because I have only seen it written But it is latine with an x at the end Huh I don't know what the pronunciation is

37:43

I have not seen that Yeah you've got to be familiar with it Because if you don't know that it exists

37:48

Then you can't be prepared to address it Your child is going to come in confrontation with it And they are not going to know what to do

37:54

It is like our conversation with Kristen Jensen About porn proofing your kids You don't want to show them porn

38:01

But you've got to prepare them to know what to do When god forbid they see it This is the exact same idea

38:06

Identify the buzz words I just want to say that this is a big one for science

38:11

If you'd like to see a talk that I do Called Darwinism and Discernment That kind of talks about the buzz words

38:16

That people use in science To kind of obfuscate the details Of like oh and then this happened Yeah you'll see those buzz words in science a lot

38:25

By the way you get two points For obfuscate It's a three point scale So you're doing really well

38:31

The third thing is Identify when you are embarrassed To state your position

38:36

If you've come to a place where you're kind of feeling like Man I've got to be on the wrong side of history I've got to be on the wrong side of this debate

38:43

Because you're embarrassed You've got to be able to identify that Because that means that either you're on the wrong side

38:49

Or that linguistic theft has occurred And you need to be able to address it And then lastly

38:55

As Hilary so wonderfully put We need to decide to be salt and light We have been called to be intentional

39:02

Premeditated disciple making Ambassador parents And God says our ambassadorial role Is a role of reconciliation

39:07

We are a city set on a hill We are salt to the tongue And we are supposed to be drawing people to us

39:15

And if we're not going to do that If we're just going to go through our lives Hoping nobody knows That we're a

39:21

Christian So we can avoid all of these conversations Then linguistic theft is going to creep into our house

39:26

It's going to steal away our family's vocabularies And we're going to be left at the end Wondering what on earth anyone's talking about And not be able to figure out

39:36

Why our kids have gone off the rails Or why they're being called haters at school

39:41

Oh yeah They'll come home asking us Mom and dad everyone hates me This is what they're saying And we're like oh

39:46

I don't know why My grandfather was really great I come home complaining that people were making fun of me

39:52

And he goes well at least they're talking to you Thanks for the advice

39:58

Not super valuable And we do that We're not valuable Because we're not equipping our kids

40:03

To be able to challenge these cultural lies And that's what the Mama Bear Apologetics books is all about I really encourage you to pick it up Hilary thank you so much

40:12

You guys are awesome Thank you for what you're doing I really hope one day we can have you back on the show Whether you guys are writing a new book

40:19

Or putting out a new tool I want to talk about it I want to get it into the hands and ears of our listeners Because what you guys are doing is really awesome

40:25

Thank you We must not allow the world to define God's terms

40:31

He is the creator of ideas Communication Philosophy Definitions Our brains

40:37

And their ability to make sense of anything we absorb Through our five senses We need to doggedly pursue a family vocabulary

40:44

That submits to the scriptures Lord willing the next two episodes Will help you and your family do that better In addition

40:50

I'll include links to some of our other shows About family talks So you can have easy access If you want to continue your study of godly communication

40:58

Now for those of you who have stuck with us Through the end of this episode I want to tell you how you can earn a chance To win a copy of Mama Bear Apologetics Empowering your kids to challenge cultural lies

41:08

And it's the exact same instructions That we gave last time And it's the exact same instructions That are located on our website

41:14

TruthLoveParent .com Under giveaways Now I'm going to announce the winners of this contest

41:19

On Friday April 3rd So you have until this coming Thursday In order to participate Now between now and then

41:26

You have three ways to get your name into the drawing And I'll explain them here And of course again go to TakingBackTheFamily .com

41:32

And you'll see the instructions there on today's post Or you'll see them on our giveaways tab

41:38

Now again you may be saying Aaron I already have the book it's been out for a while And again that's fantastic I invite you to participate

41:44

As long as you promise just to give away the book to another parent This can be just an awesome opportunity To invest in your own parenting community

41:50

Just like our last contest Which by the way is still running until Monday You have three different ways of getting your name

41:56

Into the drawing okay And you can get your name into the drawing up to three times Your first opportunity to get your name

42:02

Into the drawing is to go to TLP's Facebook page and find the post With today's episode and the hashtag

42:09

Contest And there are just a few things you need to do Make sure that you have liked TLP on Facebook Like or love the post

42:17

Comment on the post by telling us What you loved about Hillary and this particular episode And then share the post publicly

42:24

With the hashtag LinguisticTheft Please make sure you do all of those steps If you only like it or you only comment

42:31

And you share it but you forget The hashtag linguistic theft It's going to be really hard for us to figure out Who did what so you need to make sure

42:38

That you do absolutely all of these steps Just so that you can get your name into the drawing It's not complicated we have it there for you

42:45

Make sure you do all of it Some people have missed some of the steps In our previous contest Now in order to double your chances

42:51

You just have to do another social media So for example you can go over to Instagram Click the heart under the image

42:58

Make sure of course that you're following TLP on Instagram Comment telling us what one word You wish we could steal back from the culture

43:05

And then click on what looks like a paper airplane icon And share the image to your story Really important that you do that And that you include the hashtag linguistic theft

43:14

On your story Okay And then if you do that you can be submitted a second time

43:20

And then obviously you can go over to Twitter Make sure that you're following TruthLoveParent on Twitter Find the image with the contest hashtag

43:27

And then select Retweet with comment If you use Twitter you know what I'm talking about Retweet with comment

43:33

And this time for your comment tell Twitter How TLP is equipping you to be a biblical parent

43:38

And that's it Again you only have to do one of these To be entered into the competition However if you do all three your name will be entered three times

43:45

Anyone can participate As long as they have followed TLP On their chosen social media platform

43:51

They like the post They comment on the post They share the post And they use the hashtag linguistic theft

43:57

Using that hashtag is very important Because it's how we're going to be able to find your submissions And enter you into the contest

44:03

You have a week to share the contest episode We'll tally up the submissions on Thursday And announce the winners on Friday's episode

44:11

And speaking about social media Please share this episode On your favorite social media outlets

44:16

I bet that most Christian parents Have allowed the world to steal their vocabulary And the language of their children

44:22

We all needed this challenge And I'm excited to see a generation of Christian families Steal back a truly biblical vocabulary

44:29

Now if you or someone you know Would like personalized help for their family struggles Don't hesitate to contact us

44:34

At counselor at truthloveparent .com And remember if we want our children to grow up into Christ We must parent in truth and love

44:41

But we can't speak truth If we use God's word the wrong way To that end join us next time

44:47

For Watch Your Language Don't Confuse Your Children's Thinking We look forward to helping you become an intentional premeditated parent