- 00:00
- All right, so guys look we're here. There's your introduction Josiah that's
- 00:05
- Elena. That's Anna. Hey guys. Oh and For those of you that skipped a few episodes
- 00:12
- Episodes episodes we did figure out Elena's name. I figured it out All right.
- 00:17
- So we've got some things to talk about. We got to talk about youth groups today in churches It was their point in having them
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- If so, what is it and if if there is a point in having it and we define what it is
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- How should it be run? What would be the correct way of doing that? That will then
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- Lead into what is biblical manhood and biblical womanhood. What should those roles look like what?
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- Are the gender roles if you will for man and woman from the Bible we've touched on that some before but that's what we're knocking
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- Out today. So first off ladies youth groups in churches thoughts
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- Go I'll go first. Okay. Um, I have It's kind of a twofold thing for me because I'm not necessarily against them
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- It kind of depends on if to me it's more if you have new believers like first -generation believers or like our youth group where a lot of a lot of them don't have parents that cohere or Involved in any church so when it comes to that, yes,
- 01:34
- I believe that a youth ministry is something that we need to have to be able to reach out to those kids who do not have the family influence of the biblical background to be able to come up beside them and show them and teach them and disciple them so that they can
- 01:58
- Become members of our church to also learn how to disciple and teach the next generation but on the backside of that my second point to that is the fact that I Kind of feel like it's a crutch and it has been a crutch in the modern evangelical church because it's
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- Making it it has made it I guess would be a better way to put it has made it over the past say three or four generations
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- Where fathers go? Okay. Well, my kids are at church and they're in this class and they're learning about it so I don't have to be sure the biblical leader the
- 02:47
- The family leader of my household because they're getting it at church. Sure So I think it's a good thing to have as a ministry but not in the hey
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- Let's just try to bring as many kids in as possible Let them play games have a five -minute lesson and then send them back out to the world for the rest of the week and as long as we have
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- Parents who are who we are actively Teaching these are the biblical roles that you are supposed to have in your household and while the church can come up beside you and say
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- Hey, let us help you with that. Let us Help your relationship with you and your kid.
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- Let's help Back up what you are already teaching them and not just hey, what did you learn in Sunday school?
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- And they go? nothing and That's all you hear about them for the rest of the week and that's the spiritual leadership of the of the
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- Dad in that household is asking them what they learned and not moving forward with it, so to me,
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- I kind of see I've seen it as Like I did I don't remember once Really growing up where my dad came and said hey, let's have a family
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- Devotional or something like that and that's something that my husband and I have implemented in our family because we want to Instill that in our kids and make sure our kids are seeing that We are wanting to grow ourselves and them at the same time and have that family
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- Gathering where we can not only talk about biblical stuff But talk about life and talk about the things of the world that they have questions about that gives us that opportunity sure, and I think that's something that a lot of youth groups have kind of Not taken away from the family unit
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- But I think that families have learned to lean on it a lot more than they should I agree with that because that was how
- 05:04
- Wanted to say like my childhood like my teenage years was like it was the church's responsibility to teach me and then like So it just took that away from my parents and granted like my parents were divorced
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- And then my mom remarried a man who was not a Christian and so he was not really involved in that either great man
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- Love him. He's like my real dad, but with that like my mom even so she never
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- Like would really follow up on that because she didn't know enough herself And so with the church taking over that responsibility she felt
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- Confident that I was learning good things that were biblical, right? And so she really just put the trust in the hands of the church, you know it
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- I see it as the exact same thing as education and this is
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- So accustomed to people. I don't even think they think of it this way For a
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- Christian It is not the government's job to educate your children, it's your job
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- It's your job if you want to use that as a tool to do it by all means
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- Do your thing though? I would say you take a long look at some of the options we have
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- But at any rate if you send your kids to a private school great It's still your responsibility
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- You are just using that as a tool to it for an ends to a means, okay It's whether you're using a government funded public school where they're using a private school where they're using a tutor
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- It's your job. You can use whatever tools you want. But at the end of the day God holds you responsible for that So all those other things are tools in your bag for you to accomplish what you need to do.
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- That's how we should view Education that's not how we view education. Yeah, we view it as Government owes me this because the government wants quote -unquote educated people in their society.
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- So they they pay You pay we pay for everyone else's kids to be educated or we pay larger sums of money to send them to a private school and And that still is our responsibility we're just using other tools to do it it's the same type thing well,
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- I think the danger that you two are talking about is that same type of mindset of well as a mother as a father
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- I Brought them to church every
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- Wednesday and Sunday night Therefore I am fulfilling the biblical command of raising them in the nurture and the instruction of the
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- Lord, right? No Those are tools you're using to accomplish it. And I think that's wise
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- To use those tools so long as you recognize them as that The nursery program at the church is literally the best nursery program
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- I've ever seen of any church of any size anywhere and I mean that that's like for real.
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- I have two kids four and two Yes, four and two
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- Yes, my oldest Ava will come home in quote to me scripture and they
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- Like in the little curriculum that they buy Miss Sandra and Miss Carol Like it will give them like like if it's
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- Ephesians 432 will say be kind tender hearted forgiving one and it will just say be kind What'd you know for the three -year -olds, you know?
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- But Sandra doesn't do that. She prints off the entire verse and has them memorized the entire verse I've learned a couple verses from Ava Psalm 107 one never heard it till Ava quoted it now.
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- I know it but if I am trusting solely in Sandra or Carol To teach my children the scriptures.
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- I'm failing right? That's a tool I used to do that and it's a good one other faithful people.
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- That's a good one if that was the mindset we had with youth groups with Children's Church with Sunday schools if that was the mindset we had as far as it comes with children.
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- I think we would have the right mindset It's not a daycare, it's not an after -school program it is a tool that you should be using
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- To teach your own children. So I think y 'all's concern there is right. So how do you balance?
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- Because You know, there's a there's a mixture there of Well, let me just start this way let's do this one, okay
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- Do you believe That churches that have entire youth services
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- Where if you are under the age of 18? You never have a service with the adults. Y 'all think it's a good thing or a bad thing
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- I think that's a bad thing. And that was one of the things I was actually gonna mention Alright, well Anna first then
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- Elena go. Well, I think it's a bad thing because you're segregating the two groups. They don't get to see the adults participate in worship and learning and During our you know with our church in particular
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- I think we have like a different invitation time or like when I went to churches and we had invitation No one would go up And no
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- No, everyone stayed in their seat because if you went up there you had a problem and you didn't want anyone to know about You know,
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- I mean and so but with our church That's a time where it's like you're struggling the weird people are the ones not saying anything, right?
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- Yeah, not moving at all going down like, you know with other situations that we've had in our church You know that people are hurting you go down and you pray for them.
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- They get to see the adults minister to one so for you you get to set the example, it's not as much as as The the singing it's not as much as the preaching.
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- It's for that invitation time of seeing other adults Well, or whatever other adults ministering to other adults
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- Yeah, because they get to set the example and they get to see that in motion Elena. What are you saying of them?
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- The way I see it is that a lot like Anna, you know the youth even in our church
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- Which I think that's one thing that we could improve on is My husband and I were talking he said, you know before I worked in youth
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- I didn't know any of the kids because most of them either didn't grow up co -ing here
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- Their families didn't they were brought here by another friend Yeah And so no one out the youth is basically like its own little section of the church even the children's ministry
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- They come in they hang out with the adults all that even with the children's ministry That's how
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- I know a good bit of our youth is because they will like Dalton He was in our A's with my husband and then like Maddie and like other people they were
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- I did Yes with them when they were growing up, right? I didn't do that then I wouldn't have known them, right? and I mean we've been here going on five years or just at five years and I Mean, I knew some of them just from walking around and knowing their parents, but if you don't actively
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- Get to know the kids Then how are we discipling them? How are the older generation?
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- Discipling them outside of those of us in the youth group that are working in there on Wednesday nights because a lot of them don't come to Sunday mornings just Wednesday nights and I don't think that's necessarily a bad thing because our youth pastor is you know, he's awesome
- 12:51
- Yeah, our our youth ministers. The leaders are awesome. I'll say this about about that I went and taught a
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- Substitute teacher I went and taught for bro for a brother Christian for brother
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- Jeremiah maybe three months ago, you know, these are 13 to 18 year olds 12 to 18 year olds
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- Somewhere around there and I walk in And I go over there every now and then and they were learning the attributes of God and Written on the board from the previous week week was
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- God is triune in the explanation of what that means and that God is eternal and that God is omniscient and I'm just looking at this list.
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- I'm like, you know what? Not that we have everything right, but I'm gonna how many churches right now can say they're teaching their 13 year olds
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- About God's try you nature and that he is eternal. I was that's a good start
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- We didn't really do stuff like that in our youth group like some of I remember like one lesson in particular is like one thing that my youth pastor would do and like I loved my
- 14:06
- Youth pastor. Yeah, we still talk to each other but he would do certain sermons like All of the music that was like current, you know, like Bruno Mars was really popular, you know
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- It's like kind of aging me but like Bruno Mars and like Katy Perry and all these like these popular pop songs Coldplay was another he would go through these songs and He would talk about exactly what they meant and he's like and this is how it does not align up with Scripture Like why are you listening to that?
- 14:32
- Well, I think that's important. I think that the gospel is more important foundation Well, and that's the thing like with our girls, you know when
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- I did GA's Maybe one girl out of like ten could tell me what the gospel was
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- Like she had no idea and I'm like, this is a problem Sure, and so why I think I think youth groups are great and you have you know
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- Like we've all been teenagers. You're awkward and like, you know, just like it the whole thing We looked at pictures of us as teenagers a couple of weeks ago.
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- We're like god. How do we have friends I? Did not have friends because your friends also were your friends.
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- Your friends were also like that. That's Friend and she was as weird Elena and I would have been good friends in high school
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- But with all of that to say it's like I think youth groups are good because you know Like you're in that weird age group together
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- But like you said a lot of youth groups around You know around the world around our country in particular like they're probably just teaching
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- Like you said they're doing like all these games and activities to draw all these kids in and then they do a five -minute lesson
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- Then they don't disciple these kids at all. Yeah, and it becomes this big. Okay, how can we get more people?
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- How can we get more numbers? How can we get more baptism? It's not okay. How can we pour into these kids? How can we make sure that they are set up for when they go to college?
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- But another thing one thing I wish that our church would do is like one
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- Wednesday night a month Have the youth go go with an older person to the
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- Wednesday night Bible study and Be able to sit with someone that can disciple them and kind of build a relationship with older the youth the youth boys
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- Be discipled by men of the church that are Sound in their doctrine that they could come up aside because a lot of them don't have the influences it back at home but that's a really cool thing that our
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- Our youth pastor pushes to is the relationship with parents sure, and that's something that's
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- I feel like is missed a lot in youth anyway, because You know you go. Well, that's against Scripture.
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- So you shouldn't follow your parent. Well, that's not biblical If it's unbiblical, they're telling you to do something unbiblical.
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- That's different, but just saying you know trying to reconcile a relationship with a parent is
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- More of what our youth pastors are trying to do Because that's how you bring in.
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- I think I saw a Study done by oh my gosh,
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- I forgot what organization it was, but it was Like if men follow
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- Christ first or start going to church and doing what they're supposed to do 98 % of the family will follow 98 % their family follows behind if the wife comes first To Christ then the family has like I think it was like a 60 % chance of following behind But if the youth if the child comes to Christ first and is active in the church
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- It's only like a three or four percent chance that the parents will also come I mean,
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- I've seen it at our church, right? But I have seen our youth pastors time and time again
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- Try to make sure that he keeps the line of communication with those parents open whether they go to the church or not because because he wants to make sure those are fixed and that the root issues that they're having they can try to Not just address but reconcile
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- Relationships in a way that will show Christ to the parents instead of just oh, well, let's get the kids
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- And then the kids will bring parents. That's obviously not going to be the case, but if you reconcile the family and Then that child starts being able to share because they have a better relationship and they can write the difference
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- And I feel like that's something that our church Has done very well through our youth pastors, you know
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- The hard part is the truth that we said from the get Which is at the end of a day?
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- What this child needs is? For his parents to come to know the
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- Lord that that's that's what he needs and we can't make that happen But I can't tell you
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- How many kids who are now adults have never forgotten
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- The love the consistency that they were shown here and at other places, too
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- It can be a very Demoralizing thing when
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- When you have a mixture of okay, so You know, let's say you got 20 kids.
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- Well, some of these kids parents are Faithful members of these churches some of them.
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- I've seen you know every other month some of them. I've never seen I've never seen this kid's parents.
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- I mean he came back with a paper signed by his mom. I've never seen her I gotta actually call now to make sure this is actually her right?
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- It can be a very demoralizing thing. It's not an easy job. I think what
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- Anna said The best witness we could ever be as as the church in our culture to our young people is not
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- Our theology it's not our Bible studies. I think the best thing that we could ever show them is the genuine love and Service we have with others you need to highlight as a church
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- My opinion you need to highlight Those youth being able to visually see that however that takes place
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- However that takes place that needs to be highlighted and here's why so I'll give a perfect example from this morning
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- This morning Went for the past three days our deacons
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- Go and grocery shop they do everything they go in grocery shop They come up here on Saturdays and start cooking and then they get here super early
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- Sunday morning to start cooking breakfast for the congregation Like this morning Tim told me they cooked 240 eggs
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- That's 20 dozen Yeah, and then just pots of gravy and sausage and all that stuff, but you know the best thing
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- Was that I won't say their names Several of our youth boys got to see that. Yes.
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- So whatever Example there is where they can see that is more important is more important Than maybe almost anything else because they're seeing
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- The gospel lived out in lives of people for which some of them never see that lived out let me just say this about youth groups and while why
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- I'm so proud of Our youth ministers, here's why There are some
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- People now not all of them are youth some of them are adults, but I'll just pick the youth for a minute There are some people
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- That the one hour or for some of them two hours. They are on this property is
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- The only hour or two in their life where they will hear the truth in their entire week
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- Just think about that for a minute. It's the only place where they will hear there are only two sexes
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- It's the only place where they will hear That There's only race there's only one race that God is the arbiter of marriage
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- That God has created the world You don't one of the main things brother
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- Jeff teaches on when he teaches the youth Whenever he does you're not stupid for believing the
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- Bible. You're not stupid for believing the Bible. I Mm -hmm
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- Okay, that's fine. That doesn't make any less true the world is so Has such a grip on so many different areas of culture that if we in the church can't stand and say
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- It's a it's a level of confidence It's a level of confidence and be able to say I don't need other people in these other areas of my life
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- To have to Conform to them so that I can be accepted I can believe the truth simply because it's true when you teach people especially young people that type of confidence
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- That can go a long way With youth groups
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- What do y 'all think of Excuse me,
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- I just got backwards some churches Have totals now you talked about They never have total separate services.
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- They'll have a young contemporary. This is beyond youth. Maybe the word additional a traditional service and a contemporary service
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- Okay, and what do y 'all think of that so that that way at least at least if there's a contemporary service
- 24:28
- Okay, and I'm just trying to trying to see from the other side here the Hector hats all the way over there There's one right there.
- 24:35
- There's another actor. Oh my goodness Hector, what did you call this you text him or hey? That's right, it's
- 24:44
- Hector. Okay. All right. I've got the Hector hat on okay
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- Ladies no What about oh dude
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- I can see the monitor Ladies and the contemporary services. It's not all people under the age of 17.
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- They will be in the service all together They will see men and women serving each other
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- There will be corporate worship. There'll be God's word being preached will be an imitation. Please explain to me.
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- What's wrong with that? You're not Worshiping with the entire church body you're separating it.
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- It's more segregation. It's segregated because of people's Preferences preferences and that's not a reason to split a church.
- 25:30
- I'm gonna take the Hector right off. Okay, that was quick Did we get it right? That light was bright bro, it's a light right here next to me and y 'all probably knew that I didn't see that until I just Turned that was bright
- 25:43
- You're blinded. So You know I was thinking bugs like we're ants
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- One's a ripoff of the other. Yes bugs life is way better. Yeah, that's the the office does the whole thing on that But anyway, all right, so I agree
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- If I was gonna give a caveat someone might say Look when we built this church
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- We built it to hold 200 people and we grew and we have 500 people
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- So get a new church or just cram in that's what we do Here's some advice
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- I would give that person that's in the transition of that right because that that can happen It's a growing pain. It really is because let me tell you when that happens
- 26:34
- That's a great problem to have but I don't think separate splitting the church is a way to solve it Here's a here's a lot of times what happens
- 26:43
- Whenever God judges the nation He says in 1st Peter judgment begins in the household of God the church will always be judged for a culture
- 26:53
- So the Bible says is in 1st Peter. I wish you can remember the reference. That's scary judgment begins in the household of God We have gotten to see
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- God's purifying of his church past few years He he's been purifying it
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- Getting rid of more of the fake so that when you refine something what you're doing is
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- You're burning everything. That's not pure and the fake Fades away and what's real remains and if you keep doing that that's why the
- 27:24
- Bible talks about being refined seven times over you keep doing That it's more pure more pure. Well, God is refining his church in our culture
- 27:31
- So that there's less godlessness in his church And that more of the real remains what
- 27:38
- I would encourage somebody is all right Figure it out. And if you have to do two services don't split it up based on preference
- 27:46
- Have the same message preached both times Have the same song choice preached because there are scenarios like that that happens.
- 27:53
- We're okay Over the past two months. We've had 200 people join because these four churches closed down and this do so In and that pretty same message twice, you know what
- 28:03
- I mean? Put a speaker outside in a tent do whatever you gotta do Right, there you go
- 28:18
- That's what it is you're part of the All right, so I think
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- Consensus would be youth groups Can have very positive impacts whether the kids have
- 28:33
- Parents within the church or outside of the church and by church, I mean Christianity.
- 28:38
- I mean God's Word, of course So long as the practice in a way that is honoring to God and not honoring to any individual youth minister or Entertainment style right but honoring to God's Word with the notice that we have to remember
- 28:55
- We cannot replace the God ordained Structure of a family what we can do is influence it
- 29:03
- All right good on that ladies Let's move on to biblical manhood biblical womanhood and I want to ask you guys.
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- We'll start with the men Talk more about what you were saying about a man coming to know the
- 29:18
- Lord First I have a an example of this I didn't know if you guys have an example of this either in a positive or negative light
- 29:25
- I have a positive example of this but about men getting right with the Lord and the impact that can have on a family
- 29:33
- Elena you want to go I've seen it actually around here more than I ever saw it.
- 29:40
- I think growing up Just because when a Man comes to Christ and is around people who are pouring into him and discipling him and showing him
- 29:53
- What a man is supposed to be according to the gospel Then it changes the whole dynamic of the family we have several people here who have
- 30:06
- Come to Christ and then you see How their family has come up behind them and I have a specific family in my head right now
- 30:16
- I don't want to say it but you see the husband start doing what they're supposed to do and You see the wife start taking her position where she's supposed to and then you see the children's demeanor and behaviors
- 30:30
- Change under that and I mean, it's undeniable not to say isn't that incredible? It's undeniable
- 30:36
- How it happened in my own family. I mean, I thought we were My husband and I were you know?
- 30:43
- Great. We were married. We were You know Happy happy and all that and then
- 30:49
- I come here and I'm going. Oh, that's what biblical womanhood is that's what
- 30:55
- I am supposed to be striving to do and Sometimes it's a little sour to learn that It took me a long time to come to terms
- 31:05
- There was a lot of humbling a lot of humbling still are modifying But it has changed my family's dynamic just not even concentrating on what my husband's supposed to be doing just going
- 31:20
- Okay, where am I failing? What am I not doing the mirrored not just right finger and that that was what
- 31:25
- I did for We know a while was okay. He's not doing this. He's not doing that and then suddenly I'm like, well,
- 31:31
- I'm not either I have no room to talk. Let me get the plank out of my eyes Okay, I was literally over him
- 31:38
- Spirit I was literally about to say that that that passage in Matthew 7 hit me squaring my teeth a few months ago
- 31:47
- Jesus's analogy of the plank the log in your eye over a splinter of the speck and someone else's is
- 31:52
- Just because literally your sin is less you should see your own sin as a log and there's a
- 31:59
- Right, that's that's how you should view your own, but it's not like that. We are We will see the smallest
- 32:06
- The smallest imperfection that just annoys us to no end and then here we are
- 32:12
- I was I got so bad at nagging my husband. I started annoying myself That's how
- 32:17
- I knew I had gone too far Oh my god You know what God says the nagging negative wife is like the dripping rain that never ceases you were that for yourself
- 32:27
- He I did it in my kitchen one day. I was like, oh my gosh. I heard it I need to stop.
- 32:32
- Have you ever just wanted to like go away from yourself? You're like, I wish I could escape from myself. Like what a beautiful phrase.
- 32:39
- Oh, that was great. You know, I Want to say what you said it went to that point, but it did
- 32:45
- Mentioned this last week not on the podcast and when the Bible studies You know
- 32:51
- Jeremiah 17 9 The heart is desperately Desperately wicked deceitful above all else who can understand it and I just had a thought
- 33:00
- I realized All right for anyone listening think of the best liar, you know
- 33:06
- They are slick they are cunning they have hoodwinked you and made you look like an idiot They have
- 33:12
- I mean they are slick best liar, you know Okay, if you believe the Bible your heart is a better liar than them
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- Because the Bible says that your heart is deceitful above all else now. Here's why Because they can deceive you easier than than anyone else can
- 33:28
- It can make you think that what you're doing is right when it's wrong and make you think when something is wrong
- 33:34
- It's right. It can make you think you're a good person. So if Josiah Shipley does not constantly
- 33:42
- Examine What direction he said isn't heading in decisions? He's making what he's doing with God's Word I will deceive myself in the thinking that I'm doing right when
- 33:53
- I'm doing wrong That's how deceitful and it's it's not just because it can deceive others
- 33:59
- It's deceitful of all of all else your heart because it can deceive you That's that's the point of it.
- 34:06
- It is scary because if you're not constantly examining that's why there's so many scriptures say examine yourself What you were saying though Elena going back to the other thing
- 34:16
- About a man Obeying God and maybe not even coming to a
- 34:23
- Lord for the first time salvificly maybe just Taking a step in obedience.
- 34:29
- They hadn't before 1st Peter chapter 3 is a
- 34:38
- Lengthy passive scripture, maybe seven or eight verses about what an unbelieving woman is to do if she's
- 34:44
- I'm sorry What a believing woman is to do if she's married to an unbelieving husband Okay There is no such passage like that in the
- 34:54
- Bible in that length about what an unbelieving What what a believing man is supposed to do he's married to an unbelieving wife
- 35:01
- There's a couple verses in 1st Corinthians, but not like that I thought why might that be and then
- 35:06
- I realized exactly what Elena said because most of the time when a man turns to the
- 35:13
- Lord Those under his headship his wife will soon follow I have seen that happen in this church when a man leads the woman will follow
- 35:22
- Think about in Scripture with those two prison guards. Exactly. Yeah their whole family whole family
- 35:29
- Yeah, Cornelius same exact thing the whole family Followed because of that it
- 35:35
- It's the miracle a federal headship. Whatever happens to the head happens to those under it so Nine times out of ten if The man submits and obeys soon
- 35:50
- Soon his family will follow That's how God set up. That's how
- 35:55
- God designed it. That's how It is made that way So With that being said the scripture says
- 36:08
- You were talking about being blissfully ignorant about certain passages in 1st
- 36:14
- Peter 3 7 it says Husbands be understanding with your wives
- 36:20
- As they are the weaker vessel and honor them as the weaker vessel So that your prayers may not be hindered honor them not pity them
- 36:34
- Honor them as the weaker vessel so that your prayers Will not be hindered
- 36:41
- That one took me a little longer to fall asleep that night that I read that My prayers will be hindered if I do not honor my wife as a weaker vessel because now
- 36:51
- I have to know what that means To examine am I currently doing that because if not that may explain
- 36:58
- X Y & Z God set up Yeah, God set up I told
- 37:06
- John the other day I said stop I'm the weaker vessel. Oh gosh I'm worthless
- 37:15
- My words when we moved And I was eight months pregnant My husband posted on the Facebook group.
- 37:21
- I was like, yeah, we need help moving cuz I don't know like Anna's just worthless for some Human yeah,
- 37:29
- I'm like uncomfortable in August September In August and I had
- 37:35
- Elijah the next month. Yeah Ten out of ten don't recommend This was before we were
- 37:44
- Gosh it was really bad. But anyway going to sleep was harder for you after oh, oh, yeah
- 37:50
- Thanks for bringing that back up. Yeah that night was a was a tougher because I realized that but you know biblical manhood
- 37:58
- God has created spheres if you will of authority and Has set over heads of those spheres
- 38:10
- My son that word right sphere sphere sphere that was a serious s do that one more time fear nevermind don't do that again
- 38:20
- He has set up zones zones of authority with heads over them so Okay, watch this.
- 38:27
- You're ready with the church The head is Christ Okay There are heads of governments and there are heads of family
- 38:39
- Now what God has done is done this Whatever happens with rewards or disobedience with the heads
- 38:49
- Tends to trickle down on those in their Federal headship in their zone of influence.
- 38:56
- Okay, so Adam was the federal head of all humanity.
- 39:02
- So all humanity dies an atom All who believe are in Christ or as Christ died it was raised and seated in heavenly places
- 39:10
- The scriptures describe us as having died to Christ having been raised and seated in heavenly places, right?
- 39:18
- With governments God often rewarded
- 39:24
- If you look at the scripture or punished heads of nations to which the rest of the nation felt
- 39:31
- Those rewards or punishments happened when Nebuchadnezzar it happened with David and tap it happened with Solomon happened with Saul Have it happened with Pharaoh.
- 39:41
- Okay So with fathers And it's already given a couple examples of prison guards and Cornelius so with fathers them being the federal heads of That Group, yeah, brother.
- 39:57
- Jeff said this morning a sermon. They are a microcosm of a unit of bigger units of the church of Society of the whole kingdom of God.
- 40:08
- That's how it should be It's like scripture calls pastors the under shepherds and the great shepherd is
- 40:17
- Jesus So Jesus is the head of the church. He has under shepherds pastors
- 40:23
- In that way, well you can think of the same thing with governments you can think of the same thing with family units
- 40:30
- The job of the father is to be the head of the house in His number one job is to provide now people think when
- 40:43
- I say provide they immediately think financial but the word provide means to see
- 40:50
- That's what it means the Hebrew word Jehovah Jireh Yahweh here the
- 40:56
- Lord will provide it's how it's normally translated on your grandmother's quilt and read above the fireplace with the twelve names of God Jehovah Jireh It means the
- 41:05
- Lord will provide it actually means the Lord will see We have an expression in English. I'll see to it that it gets done now when if Elena says
- 41:14
- I'll see to it That it gets done. She doesn't just mean she'll watch it happen. She means whatever it takes to make it happen
- 41:21
- She will make it happen. She'll see it Husband's job that's right is to provide to see to it
- 41:28
- His job is see to it Titanus his job is to see to it that X Y &
- 41:34
- Z happen, right? the number one Tool for me for example
- 41:41
- My wife Stays at home with the children The number one way
- 41:47
- I see to it that they are provided for an area X Y & Z is through my wife
- 41:53
- That's the number one way. That's how I see to it Husband's job is to see to it and to empower in this case my wife to do a
- 42:06
- B and C to get X result But the husband's job is always to see to it that it gets done
- 42:13
- Whatever tools are needed we talked to her about education We talked about the scripture whatever tools are need to make that done is up to you
- 42:19
- But the job has to get done and it's your response and this is the hard part fathers
- 42:26
- When it doesn't happen you take full responsibility when it does happen you take none That's that's hard when things go.
- 42:33
- Well, the Bible says that It's the wife's crown and then if something goes wrong, it's that's
- 42:40
- I'm really glad I'm the wife. All right, I told on I was like, I'm really glad I'm not the man because you have a lot more responsibility than I do and I'm okay with that, right?
- 42:52
- It's funny it's funny whenever You can see it in people's eyes when
- 42:59
- I preach It's like all the men in the room are about to be gleefully happy When I preach on submission for example for all the women in the room are
- 43:12
- Awaiting the but or the and or the if Yeah When it comes to switching to women now
- 43:20
- When it comes to which the room and I'll let you guys I'll just get us started here. I Don't think you need to go further
- 43:27
- Than the opening pages of the Bible To say what is the purpose of women?
- 43:34
- God looked through all creation of Every galaxy of the universe and said of all of I created in everything there is nothing
- 43:48
- Nothing That is a suitable partner for the man. I've created.
- 43:54
- There's nothing on no planet. There's no star There's no there's nothing So out of the man
- 44:02
- He created a man from the dust and created her from him out of the man he created a woman and then here is the operative word as a help mate a help mate and She was
- 44:23
- Adams help mate and not anybody else's right that I that's that picture right there.
- 44:32
- I think says what needs to be said, but that is the goal It is amazing to me
- 44:39
- How every now and then I can find Christian women who not not you too, but I can find
- 44:44
- Christian women who love to Point out the yeah for this doesn't go right. It's all my husband's fault
- 44:52
- Right in that yeah, if you are his help mate How could you ever be
- 45:02
- Nonchalant about that sentence that that would be that's like the the partner the sidekick in the police car being like Oh, yeah, he screwed that one up, bro.
- 45:11
- You were in the car. You were in the car, man. All right, so Manhood I think we covered biblical womanhood.
- 45:19
- Can I speak on the manhood part of course, okay something I don't think we really covered is that For a man to be able to leave lead he needs to know how to serve
- 45:30
- I think that is very important in this day and age because it's
- 45:36
- We're surrounded by this me mentality all the time. I mean look at tick -tock. It's people
- 45:42
- Okay, sorry realization, but I had like just the other day Like anything that you see on tick -tock or like YouTube like people who vlog it's all about me in my life
- 45:54
- And about me me me me me me and I'm just like you have made a job for yourself Like exploiting yourself and your kids and like whomever and you know granted like, you know come for me in the comments
- 46:06
- I don't care but it's just like it's just it's our culture It's the culture that we have that it's just all about me.
- 46:13
- So right go ahead. No, but and the men men tend to think that I am
- 46:20
- Providing for my family because I go to work and I make the money and that there's so much more to that see to it being a leader means serving
- 46:29
- Even as a wife about like how much money my husband brings in right need you to be present
- 46:35
- It's being your home. I need you to be a leader when we're home. I need you to help discipline I need you know, especially
- 46:41
- I have three boys. Okay. I have an eight -year -old and two six -year -olds and they're wild Okay, they're like little wild wings
- 46:48
- Like I picture It's like it's like Lord of the Flies in my house, they match my daughter's energy
- 46:58
- They match my daughter's energy, but she has met their match with them they bro, they play rough I like it.
- 47:04
- They play rough John doesn't let them play rough with her, but you know, he could they could but yes
- 47:11
- Hey, hey, you know, they had that wrestling at the sog match. I was going. Oh my gosh I could put the twins in here.
- 47:16
- Oh my goodness. We could make some real money. Hey, you know what? They can actually fight money in the cage
- 47:25
- My kids will actually beat each other up. It's actually kind of fun to watch man But anyway, but your kids my kids.
- 47:32
- I want my boys One thing I got married very young. I was 18 when I got married and I remember one of my thoughts was
- 47:43
- Yeah, do I want kids? Like him before I got married do I am
- 47:48
- I okay with my kids being like him and the answer was yes so that was one of my deciding factors and marrying him was
- 47:55
- I'm okay with having children that will grow up to be like him and I've never thought of that.
- 48:01
- But when you said that I'm like, that's good. Thanks. I'm like, well, I'm glad I you know chose to That wasn't my deciding factors that was
- 48:11
- I mean that was one of them But since you mentioned it, yeah, right. I'm gonna have three more Donovan's. Yeah See, I'm one of those weird people that like even in high school
- 48:19
- I'm like, I'm gonna date someone that I can see myself married. Oh, yeah for sure I only had three boyfriends before I got married.
- 48:26
- Yeah, but but that's the thing But anyway model your children like you write your kids your boys
- 48:32
- Specifically to be like your husband right because you see what type of later He is you see what type of man?
- 48:39
- Husband he is and you want your boys to be that for their wives Uh -huh, and that's something that as a wife when it comes to discipline.
- 48:47
- I have to check myself because The way he needs to discipline my kids for them to turn out like him
- 48:55
- That means I have to step back and allow him to do that. I say allow but really it's it's me
- 49:02
- Making sure I'm not overstepping and saying hey That's too far and then stepping in front of him while he is be on a united front, right?
- 49:11
- So I can but behind closed doors later be like honestly, I don't think you he should have been punished for that but that's not something as a wife that you would come up to him late that you would step in front of your children because then that just demeans him in front of your children and that's something that Especially I think in this day and age where we have the feminist movement and you know
- 49:36
- Oh me and my husband are equal. We do things equally we do this Well, yes, that's great. But you need to make sure that you are still accounting your husband's
- 49:45
- Husband respectfully, you know something as women that we have a hard time doing we need to be loved
- 49:50
- They need to be respected and if that's good It's a book We need to be loved men need to be respected so and a big thing in marriage is that We want to love how we feel like we need to be loved right instead of looking at our husband and saying, okay
- 50:10
- How do you just looking again at me? Well since I you know, since I want to be right
- 50:16
- I want like this Yeah, right. You know what? Let me just give you two examples and then
- 50:22
- Continue on two examples of how our society is getting this wrong.
- 50:27
- You see marriage is not a Slaveship, right and it's also not man's invention.
- 50:34
- It's God's creation that society's adopted because they're like, oh, it's a good idea Right, and then they claim to then it's like they came up with the idea
- 50:41
- They think they think they came up with the idea They stole the idea because they figured it was good to model it after Something that was working and then they
- 50:51
- Right now that's literally all it is a governmental piece of paper saying Oh, we can file a lot of together deciding just not even to get married, right?
- 50:59
- I don't want the government. Let me give you two examples real life my life and And when this doesn't shock some of you and once you realize
- 51:11
- How amazing is that? This doesn't shock you when Naomi was born my second. I went to the hospital with Rachel we both
- 51:21
- Walked in to the desk They handed me a sticker with the word visitor written on it and put it on my chest
- 51:29
- Now for some of you that doesn't shock you because you're like, well, yeah, you're not you're not the patient You're not giving birth that would not have happened 20 years ago.
- 51:37
- Well, the father wasn't even allowed in the delivery room, you know 20 years ago.
- 51:43
- Yeah, I We were there, right My dad was there visitor. Mm -hmm, right visitor partner.
- 51:51
- No, what emphasis does that give? What emphasis does that give on the importance of?
- 51:58
- Roles in that children. I'll tell you right right number two now When I say this,
- 52:05
- I never say this and it always shocks people which doesn't shock me except that it shocks Christians. I Was a public school teacher and I had one mother
- 52:18
- It was always mothers or aunts or grandmothers I almost never talked to Fathers every now and then uncle almost never talked to fathers.
- 52:29
- I Had a mother who I taught two of her kids one Son, and then a couple years later another son.
- 52:36
- Okay, and Somewhere in there Rachel and I had
- 52:41
- Ava my oldest and And I like I was excited and I showed her a picture or whatever
- 52:49
- And she goes isn't amazing. Did you ever think you could love somebody so much and without even hesitating?
- 52:55
- Well, yeah my wife she just looked at me and Like she was waiting on me to take back what
- 53:05
- I said, just kidding. Just kidding. Haha. Yeah, and she goes she goes Yeah, but surely you love your child more than your wife.
- 53:13
- Oh, no, and I said not at all And you know what?
- 53:19
- Sometimes we know the right answer to say Christians Church But our actions show the opposite our actions show
- 53:27
- That we love our children more than our spouse and we are teaching them That's how it should be.
- 53:33
- But here's the problem gentlemen Do you understand the
- 53:39
- Bible When we say it's God -breathed it means it's perfect and nothing needs to be adjusted or changed
- 53:48
- It's God's words breathed out through the pens of men Blank love your blank as Christ loved the church so here we have the highest example of love ever demonstrated in the universe
- 54:01
- Christ loving the church and I feel like that most
- 54:06
- Christians would fill in those blanks with Grandparents love your grandchildren or mothers love your children as Christ loved the church
- 54:14
- But that's not what the scripture said the highest example the comparison the equalizer the equalizer gentlemen, some of you who want to get married or think you do the equalizer of stress as Christ loved the church
- 54:31
- It's husbands love your wives And if that was the end of the verse that be the easiest verse in the
- 54:37
- Bible to obey because then we could define what? Love is but it's not it says husband. Love your wives as Christ loved the church the verse
- 54:46
- Excuse me preceding Wives submit to your husband's is not a difficult verse to obey because you get to define what submit is
- 54:54
- But that's not what the verse says. It says wives submit to your husband's as to the Lord Mm -hmm.
- 55:00
- Now you have Oh in the way that I submit to God In the way that God loves the standard is
- 55:10
- God For both people there. That's the state of a standard is God If it was just submit to your husband's if it was just love your wives, that's not a difficult verse to obey
- 55:21
- Because we get to define what that love and submission is, but we don't I'm talking too much. I'm gonna shut up No, actually,
- 55:26
- I love that verse because the word love there is agape. Oh, which is a verb.
- 55:31
- It's It's God's love put into action. Yes, and so then you have to go and say, okay.
- 55:39
- Well, how does God love us by? Sacrifice sacrifice the the husband should not come home and sit on sit in his recliner and you know
- 55:50
- Veg out on TV all night while the mom finishes dinner. She could she cleans up and then, you know the kids go upstairs with him or whatever and You know, she's left her own thing just finish up everything else to start bedtime all that and then the whole point is that the husband comes home and he helps serve as The second parent and I think that's a lot of the time is oh, well,
- 56:18
- I worked all day. I provided and I've been home with this child all day. I'm not sitting here eating bonbons watching your
- 56:25
- Children my child is five months old Well, and that's the thing though, like the way that my husband and I do things are we are a team
- 56:34
- Mm -hmm, if one person fails we all fail right we will pick up We've been picking up each other slack a lot lately just because I don't know like the whole month of February like I was sick
- 56:46
- Like the whole month I had like a stomach virus a couple of weeks ago and then had strep throat and then tonsillitis
- 56:51
- Dang sure never get over yourself, man That was like two weeks ago, but never been that sick in my life and then my husband and I were talking about how man
- 57:03
- I'm just so glad that like I'm over being sick the next day. My husband gets an ear infection and he's almost 30
- 57:09
- I'm like, I don't even know adults can get ear infections Thing but that's my thing. We were a that was low -key an insult
- 57:18
- Died he had an earache No, no, I mean, I didn't know adults got an ear infection
- 57:26
- I didn't know like adults got You know cuz you never hear about adults or kids, you know getting but anyway,
- 57:34
- I digress with that being said We're always a part of the team We will pick each up each other slack like yesterday he was doing yard work like all day like lifting heavy things
- 57:45
- I'm like, okay. Well, I'm gonna watch the baby. I'm gonna clean up inside. He told me about the concrete stuff
- 57:58
- You were so happy you had the baby in your arm at that moment didn't you I'm sorry I can't put him down on his mat right now.
- 58:05
- I have to Because I'm nursing and when I was inside nursing my baby
- 58:12
- I could see my husband working out in the backyard and I just said and I talked to my baby and I'm like, buddy
- 58:18
- Your dad is so strong and your dad is so hard -working And you know, I mean he looked cute out there working all hard.
- 58:25
- Thank you. I love that watching John Like all right you get it
- 58:31
- Paul Bunyan, but that's the thing I was like I told him I say buddy your dad is so strong and he's such a good leader
- 58:37
- And it's like I know he has it's just static in his brain right now, but I'm like, I want him to know
- 58:42
- You know, okay, you know what ladies it's amazing Y 'all were just of course and how far do we but you know what all day?
- 58:52
- Yeah, it's a good thing He goes to work to get away You know why
- 58:59
- Because God designed women to be attracted to masculinity. Yep in a culture that does not
- 59:06
- Promote that we'll see the demise God designed men to be attracted to femininity. So long as you have the biblical definitions of those two words culture can
- 59:17
- Continue to move on but once you start messing with that and tell people that that's actually not you tell people
- 59:24
- Oh, no, that's not what you want That you you have no other basis to stand on right ladies before we we got about 10 minutes left before we close out
- 59:33
- Well, let's go ahead and knock this out you we use the word submission earlier, what does that look like biblically?
- 59:40
- What is that? What does that look like in real life? How do you how do you answer to me? Okay, so with and granted it's like well,
- 59:49
- I think that submission is blah blah blah How I look but we like your opinion, so it's okay.
- 59:57
- Well, I'm saying like it's not like what do you think of this scripture? You're trying to make you feel So it's like my perspective the way that I see submission and my husband and I's Relationship within our marriage and I've had to do this on a couple of occasions and it freaking sucks
- 01:00:17
- Even if I disagree with what he wants to do if he thinks it is best for our family
- 01:00:24
- Okay, and there have been times When the decision that he made was not the best and I did not sit there and say this is all your fault
- 01:00:32
- You are the reason why we were in this predicament blah blah blah I just keep my mouth shut because you know what he thought at the time based on our circumstances
- 01:00:42
- What have you that he was making the best decision for us? that is his responsibility as a husband and as a man of the house and I'm not sitting here.
- 01:00:53
- Like you said women need love men need respect I'm there to give my husband their respect Like I said, even if I don't agree with it because there have been a couple of things
- 01:01:01
- I'm like, okay This is my opinion. We make decisions Like as a team, like I said however if he still thinks this is the better thing then he is going to go past what
- 01:01:12
- I think and he is going to make That and I have to be okay with that even if I'm not but I will respect my husband and I will honor him in that and you can tell when those
- 01:01:22
- Circumstances come up where it does not go as planned as they thought.
- 01:01:28
- Hey it Will destroy it will break them And if you're coming up behind your husband pointing a finger when you're supposed to be the one lifting them up You're just burying them further, right?
- 01:01:40
- Yeah, your words mean a lot more than you think your actions towards your husband
- 01:01:45
- That's something I had to learn because I grew up with a very Strong feminist mother.
- 01:01:51
- I love my mother and I love how she raised me and I would not be the woman I am without her
- 01:01:57
- So this is nothing against against her but I was not shown how a
- 01:02:05
- Biblical marriage should look so that's not something that I even started really exploring until five years into our marriage and for me looking into what the
- 01:02:17
- Bible actually says specifically for wives to do is Everything that I was really taught
- 01:02:24
- Not to do Yeah, right and Because of that I had to relearn and rewire a lot of stuff especially
- 01:02:36
- Especially the submission part because to me it was well, I can have my own opinions
- 01:02:42
- I can do this I can do that but I did not see and I didn't even it was not clear to me how
- 01:02:48
- I was breaking my husband and how I was hurting his his Demeanor and how he made decisions because he didn't want to rock the boat or something like that because I would you know, push back a lot of the time and so I Realized for me that it was serving and that it was saying
- 01:03:11
- Okay, we're gonna do it your way or like you said when we have decisions The buck stops stops with him whether I agree with it or not
- 01:03:20
- He makes the final say he had the final say and I could not Come back and go.
- 01:03:26
- Well told you I told you it's gonna be like that. I told you Okay, this is where we're at.
- 01:03:33
- You know, what are we gonna do? I can fix it, right? I can remember one time in staff meeting this is for Gentlemen, if you don't know
- 01:03:53
- How dare you expect your wife to submit to you when you don't even you've never submitted to anyone else
- 01:03:59
- That should not be a new concept for you. I can remember one time in staff meeting We were coming to a decision on how
- 01:04:06
- Some of that was gonna be run and I was the only person of like 20 who thought it should be run in way
- 01:04:11
- X and Everyone else decided it should be running way Y and I thought way Y was stupid And I said guys
- 01:04:19
- I just let's make sure cuz once I walk out of this door I'm going to say that way
- 01:04:25
- X is the right way to do it Because if I don't I'm gonna have a bitter attitude about it. So is everyone sure?
- 01:04:31
- Yes. Okay fine And I literally made myself when I walked out the door I made my brain agree that that's the best way to do it when we ran the event and Someone made a comment.
- 01:04:42
- Well, really we should do it like this It was the way I suggested I said no that doesn't make sense should be done this way
- 01:04:48
- I wasn't lying I literally changed my brain and said this is the right way because how could I ever?
- 01:04:54
- Think in my brain that just me. Yeah would be right and you know what?
- 01:05:01
- Whenever I This will sound harsh, but I don't mean it to be how dare us think
- 01:05:13
- That anything outside of God's design is superior so when
- 01:05:24
- I Have a man who will say Yeah, you know My wife
- 01:05:32
- X Y & Z and I don't know what her problem is. I'm never gonna forgive her for X Y &
- 01:05:38
- Z When I have a wife say
- 01:05:45
- I've heard this so many times Well, I have no problem submitting to God because he's perfect. I just have a problem submitting to my husband.
- 01:05:51
- I understand that here the problem is You do have a problem submitting to God because God is the one who told you to submit to your husband, right?
- 01:05:59
- You you absolutely you can't that It's the same thing with the man. No, you are not loving
- 01:06:05
- God because he's the one who told you to love your wife that You can't have it both ways and how arrogant can we be to think?
- 01:06:15
- That our experience how we were raised Or is the right way think about what we're saying when we do that not with our words with their actions
- 01:06:24
- No, God, our way is higher. Your way is lower. You need to change the
- 01:06:29
- Bible. You got it wrong, you know Just okay. Yeah. Yeah, right, but you know and we don't know that but that's that's the haughtiness of our hearts when we have
- 01:06:39
- That attitude, right, you know It is the the biggest step is not
- 01:06:46
- The biggest step is coming to that realization and making the decision of okay that it's on a mile
- 01:06:53
- I'm gonna model my life and that Takes some time, especially if you didn't start off that way
- 01:06:59
- But it's worth it in the end and in that sanctification of obeying
- 01:07:05
- God You learn to trust God more because that's what it boils down to they're gonna be times that feels crazy crazy
- 01:07:14
- But if I trust God For my salvation, I trust him and how it says I'm supposed to treat my wife
- 01:07:20
- I trust him how it says supposed to raise my children. I trust him how it says I'm supposed to act at work It's I trust if I trust him for one
- 01:07:26
- I trust him for all that I trust him for none of it. Either his word is trustworthy or it's not So, yeah, you know
- 01:07:37
- Paul writes all the Ephesians 5 and Then he ends it with one little sentence.
- 01:07:42
- It's almost exactly what Anna said, but he says in the end See to it that a husband loves his wife and the wife respects the husband
- 01:07:51
- It's almost kind of what you said that like he writes this long thing and if you can't remember all these details
- 01:07:57
- Here's what it is. You show him respect you show her love. That's that's the end of it
- 01:08:04
- But it's because God knew what we needed as a man and as a woman because we are different he
- 01:08:11
- I mean again the first two chapters She is his helpmate. He is not hers because that's already flipping the rolls back.
- 01:08:19
- She is his helpmate What is a helpmate? Well, it's someone who helps is always on someone's side who counsels but who?
- 01:08:31
- Longs to see the success of the one Yes because that is her success and I will say like one thing before we go is
- 01:08:40
- I think I mentioned this last week and I had mentioned this like in our previous conversation is as a
- 01:08:46
- Christian and having a husband who is a Christian and who is a leader It's like I am honored to serve under his leadership.
- 01:08:55
- He does not like not a slave of his I'm Christ's slave I'm not in the fact, you know, like all the feminists are like, oh, well, he owns you
- 01:09:03
- It's like not in the way that you think like, you know, like whatever but it's like I'm he may be in charge of me
- 01:09:09
- But he does not own me, right? It's like I'm honored to serve under him and until you were only no good word
- 01:09:15
- Until you fully know what it's like to have a biblical relationship. You will not understand that. Yeah, you'll just you'll not understand
- 01:09:23
- I will I want to touch a little bit if it's alright about I've had conversations with several women in the past month about how like just taking that step in serving your spouse where you're at and getting started getting started getting started and one of the
- 01:09:44
- Hardest things when you get started if you are the only one in that relationship that you feel like you're the only one trying.
- 01:09:51
- Yeah Don't let that become bitterness Because that Will destroy your relationship.
- 01:09:58
- You're not serving your spouse. Think of it as serving serving You're not looking at it for anything in return.
- 01:10:04
- You're doing it because you love them Whether they yelled at you earlier that day whether they were demeaning towards you.
- 01:10:11
- It doesn't matter You still do what you're supposed to do and you can't go well when they got home from work, they went just sat down and started playing video games and I'm mad because I'm here cooking dinner.
- 01:10:22
- The baby's crying and I have all these things to do and I can't do everything
- 01:10:28
- So I'm you know holding them at this high standard Well, yeah,
- 01:10:34
- I understand that but make sure that you are still doing what you are supposed to be doing and do not hold that Bitterness all you can do you cannot make your spouse do something.
- 01:10:43
- Yeah, that is for that is for God to change their heart Accountability groups if they have one to speak that truth into them now granted you can make your expectations be made known
- 01:10:53
- But not in a way. Yeah. Yeah, because that's what I was doing. I thought I was just telling my husband
- 01:10:59
- These are my needs but instead I was saying you're not doing this, right? you're not doing that right and I was tearing him down when
- 01:11:05
- I wasn't meaning to and for me what helped us was when
- 01:11:11
- I changed my mindset from Okay This is what's going on.
- 01:11:18
- I'm going to serve him in spite of him and that's something we have to do as moms
- 01:11:23
- Yeah, is I'm gonna serve my child whether they're gonna be a turd that day or not and more than likely
- 01:11:29
- They will be more than likely and we're still going to set selflessly serve them But when it comes to our spouse, we're like, oh, well, they're not giving me what
- 01:11:37
- I need Backwards when in reality your kids not giving you what you need either. You know what?
- 01:11:43
- They're just taking from you. Yeah, when you are doing what you are supposed to be doing
- 01:11:49
- As the Bible calls you to do it, which is serving your spouse, that's right and submitting to your spouse
- 01:11:55
- Yeah then seeing the blessings that that will bring to your family and that has been brought to my family because I am
- 01:12:02
- Concentrating on what I am doing wrong and what I need to do Yeah, not concentrating on what the kids are supposed to be doing or what my husband's supposed to be doing but Specifically me and just praying over my spouse and that's something
- 01:12:17
- I think we have a lot of bitterness and we have this prayer of God Please change them in this way instead of saying
- 01:12:23
- God take their heart do your will and You know change my heart and my prayer to be what he needs and you know, it's funny
- 01:12:34
- We there really can be two different attitudes towards that if I were God if I were God, I don't want to say that sentence
- 01:12:39
- Yeah, let me start that over God may think of that two ways He might be like like when you say well,
- 01:12:45
- I started obeying and I'm bitter because I've been doing I've started He might be like congratulations for the past four weeks.
- 01:12:52
- You finally been doing what I've been telling you to do for 20 years But you know at the same time
- 01:13:00
- What really the answer to every question we've gone over today is first Peter chapter 3 1 through 7 First Peter 3 1 through 7 is really what these ladies and a little bit of me
- 01:13:10
- But most of these ladies have discussed but first Peter 3 just think about this
- 01:13:16
- If this doesn't encourage you watch another podcast, I don't know says this it says
- 01:13:25
- The Believing wife who's married to an unbelieving husband Can win him over ladies listen
- 01:13:33
- Without a word first Peter chapter 3. Let me read that again. Let me say it again
- 01:13:38
- That he may be won over without a word by the conduct impurity of Your life with a gentle and quiet Spirit first Peter chapter 3 one more time
- 01:13:54
- Hey, if if if a woman if a Christian woman if her conduct can be so pure So servant hearted so gentle and quiet that it can win over an unbeliever
- 01:14:10
- What could it do for your believing husband that just needs a little help? Not just that he when you start doing what you're supposed to and he starts looking at you and seeing the change in you it
- 01:14:22
- More more than likely it's gonna make him go. Okay. Well, what what what is she doing? I need and if it can do that with a believing woman and I believe with an
- 01:14:32
- Unbelieving husband what can it do in your marriage with a husband? Who's a believer? He's just a little stupid right that that passage has always
- 01:14:41
- Confounded me as amazing because as women we like to talk a lot. So without a word, it's almost like it's almost like God God Don't speak.
- 01:14:51
- Yes God and just do it. God knows women. Hey, I want to I want to close with a story because I we do got to go
- 01:14:58
- I want to close with one story one of the most beautiful acts of submission I've ever seen From a man
- 01:15:06
- One that the people in this room know well We were we're congregational church
- 01:15:12
- Which means we vote on major decisions financial decisions such like that and we had a church vote
- 01:15:18
- And It was I'm purchasing something. I don't remember and two people voted no, I was like,
- 01:15:24
- I don't know 150 Okay One of the people that voted no called me the next day and said, all right, how can
- 01:15:32
- I help implement this? Just Let that seep into your brain for a minute
- 01:15:39
- Not go gossip about in the parking lot not talking about how such a bad idea not wait for it Fell make a Facebook post or leave the church called the pastor
- 01:15:48
- Say all right, how can we implement this someone who thought it was a bad idea and This was a quote.
- 01:15:54
- Well 148 of my brothers and sisters didn't so I must be wrong. So I'm changing my opinion
- 01:16:01
- That's the right attitude ladies, I Won't say anything new than what these two just said that now becomes that now became his opinion
- 01:16:16
- Because the authority greater than him in this example the majority of the congregation
- 01:16:23
- Believed X so he literally changed his opinion to that. That's one of the most beautiful examples
- 01:16:29
- I've ever seen Gentlemen Earlier, one of the ladies were talking about leadership is in service first.
- 01:16:39
- That is exactly what Jesus said the Son of Man came Not to be served but to serve and they give his life as a ransom for many
- 01:16:46
- Well, let that be our close first Peter chapter 3 1 through 7 will answer any questions you have about biblical manhood womanhood
- 01:16:52
- There's the answer for you right there. All right ladies Final word.
- 01:16:58
- I'm good Elena if anyone has an issue with the whole wives submit thing and you know, just biblical topics when it comes to The woman's role just realize and you probably haven't heard this is the fact that The Bible speaks about this much on a page when it comes to husbands and wives and their roles
- 01:17:23
- The wives part is usually about this big and the husband's what part is about this big because of how much they are held
- 01:17:29
- Responsible for yes. So if you are even on the fence or think oh, well, you know
- 01:17:36
- This is just to hold me back go and read what the responsibilities of men are and just ask yourself you know actually search and just say do
- 01:17:47
- I want to be held responsible for this because you're you don't have to be and right and That's one of the things that as I was
- 01:17:57
- I've actually done like a study on marriage and that was one of the biggest takeaways for me was
- 01:18:04
- You know, I don't have all these responsibilities these things will not be You know my fault if things go wrong and that's to say something and then in that look and go
- 01:18:16
- How can I help my husband achieve achieve? That's good because Me tearing down.
- 01:18:23
- My husband is doing nothing but showing my sons that this is the way that your wives are gonna be able to Treat you.
- 01:18:29
- Yeah, man, and that is you don't want them problems I want good word. I want my sons to be able to look at me and how
- 01:18:38
- I show respect and love to my husband and say this is my standard and Be able to look biblically and go.
- 01:18:47
- Okay now that was my standard What does God say about it? Right and was she doing what she was supposed to do and can
- 01:18:55
- I expect that from the woman that I will eventually marry? Boom and if not your standard change is not
- 01:19:01
- God's right there it is Guys, you can send in whatever questions topics you have to listen point taken at gmail .com
- 01:19:11
- On Instagram, you can follow us at point taken Christian podcast. You can send in any questions topics.
- 01:19:17
- You have did we get it, right? Did we get it wrong? Don't mind if we're wrong. We're wrong.
- 01:19:22
- We'll redo it. It's a beautiful thing about having a studio in the church We can redo it whenever you want see that Guys Anyway, we can help minister serve speak of word encouragement.
- 01:19:33
- Tell us how we can do that. But until next time do this Download the
- 01:19:39
- Witten app and go to giving and just put in podcasts. We need some lights and cameras and stuff action