Highlight: Male and Female, and Why It Matters

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00:00

Yeah, so from the perspective that I'm coming from, if two people can be together in a couple and reproduction is not a requirement,

00:12

I don't understand why two people of the same sex who are in a loving union, they uplift each other, they support each other, they only make each other's lives more positive and work together as a loving union.

00:32

I don't understand why excluding reproduction, which would not be possible,

00:38

I don't know why that would be an issue to God. I know you probably get that a lot, but it is a very simple comment, but it is kind of I want to get to the nuts and the bolts of Christianity, right?

00:50

Yeah, no, no. You're asking, I think, very good questions. You're making the point that if a husband and a wife, a man and a woman can engage in sexual activity with each other that's not for the purpose of procreation, it's just for the purpose of intimacy and pleasure and joy, then why can't somebody of the same sex engage in the same thing?

01:11

Yeah, and provide the same aspects of a straight marriage where you're loving each other, you're uplifting each other, you're making each other's lives just better in general.

01:24

Yes, so that's a great question, and I'll say to that that I think comparing the relationship of a man and a woman who are in a union that is blessed by God, that is created by God, that is functioning according to the created order, comparing that sexual union and relationship that is even for the purpose of just pleasure with each other to a man and a man and a woman and a woman engaging in sexual relationships,

01:56

I think it's not comparable, and here's why it's not comparable, because we're talking about something that is defined by God.

02:05

He created us, and He created human sexuality. He created it for pleasure, but He created it in a particular context, and so when

02:15

He created us to have sex and to have these intimate relationships, He created them in a certain way to function and to bless, and He created those relationships where even the body parts shout to God's created order and His purpose.

02:32

When you take that and you say, well, I want to have all of the benefits of sexual intimacy and pleasure and even emotional stuff that goes with a normal human relationship designed by God, I want it all, but I want it over here, what

02:47

I would say is that it's a violation of, number one, a relationship that we're supposed to have with God and the relationship that God intends for us to have with one another in the world that He made.

02:58

So what I would say, I said this to Lizzie, I believe I said it to Spencer last time, is that we don't often think about the fact that we think at times when we make these choices, well,

03:10

I'm just making this choice to be loving. I'm making this choice because it does feel good to us.

03:15

It works for us. We're not hurting anybody. And what I would actually say to that is actually, no, all of my broken sexual choices did hurt people.

03:25

They did. I'll make this very personal, Spencer, so you can hear from a Christian and from a pastor where I'm coming from with this.

03:33

When I think about my past of sexual sin, I can tell you right now that every single sexual relationship that I ever had, and there were many, again,

03:43

I wasn't raised in a Christian home, all of those sexual relationships were consensual.

03:49

All of them, every single one of them, consensual. Many times it was the woman or the girl who was instigating that sexual relationship or intimacy with me.

04:00

So somebody might look at a relationship like that and they might say, see, it was consensual. You didn't hurt anybody, just two consensual adults.

04:07

Actually, it was very hurtful. Not only was it a sin against God, because God didn't create us to be taking advantage of one another like that and taking parts of each other with us everywhere that we go and throwing people away.

04:19

But I actually, I think about this a lot and I've had to work through issues of forgiveness and peace over this.

04:25

In my sexual past, all those relationships were all consensual. But guess what? I slept with a lot of men's wives.

04:35

Think about that. Now that's, of course, I'm a teenager, I'm 18, she's single,

04:42

I'm single. But there are girls that I was sexually intimate with today that are married to men and have children.

04:49

Yes, I did hurt somebody. I did. I hurt all of those husbands because I took something from their wife that was very consensual that didn't belong to me.

05:01

I disrupted that life and that relationship. It was all consensual, but it was very broken.

05:08

Things shouldn't be that way. I took something that belonged to another man. It didn't belong to me.

05:13

And of course it was consensual, but it definitely hurt. It definitely was a sin against God, and it definitely disrupted the way that God intended for the world to be.

05:25

Also, just one more example, Spencer, I care for you.

05:31

And so just take this not as an assault, take it as a query, a question.

05:37

When we think about how God created things, we know God's given a word, I've already explained some of it. And of course he defines even more particulars,

05:44

I'm sure you're aware of this, you seem like a bright guy, in his word in terms of this but not that. He'll define a homosexual act as a sin, adultery as a sin, he'll just name a bunch of different sins, don't do these, that's a sin.

05:56

We know that from his word, he defines this, I'm God, here's what

06:02

I made this for, don't do this. But at the same time, Spencer, we don't just have special revelation from God, we also have the creation itself, the created order that is just shouting to us.

06:15

And so when you think about this question, you can think about it from God's special revelation, but you can also think about it from creation itself, where when we say this isn't hurting anybody, that's not actually the case, because the studies, both medically and statistically in terms of sociology do demonstrate, they just do demonstrate.

06:40

You don't need a Christian to tell it to you, you can read it, read all the research yourself that the homosexual lifestyle and these relationships cause very significant damage, both to the human body and in terms of social order.

06:58

You know, I'll say one thing in terms of nature, our bodies are built to function by God a certain way in human sexuality and relationships.

07:10

And when we talk about how those body parts are supposed to fit, when we say I'm not hurting anybody, no, it is physically damaging to the body, and it also is sociologically damaging.

07:21

The lifestyle is damaging. It does hurt. Would you, are you referring to like in terms of mental health or?

07:31

Mental health, we're talking about in terms of the clear numbers that just cannot be disputed.

07:39

You can check me out on this. I can get your resources in terms of the destructive nature of that lifestyle choice, not only physically, it's created for exit.

07:51

Yeah, I'm trying to be I'm trying to be cautious, but I assume you're like talking about like physical stuff as in like gay male sex.

08:02

Well, that's one aspect I can I can expatiate, I can expatiate on that, but I will just say lesbian sex doesn't hurt anyone.

08:09

Well, the numbers, the numbers, I'm not traumatized.

08:16

Yeah, well, I would I get there's plenty of resources not written by Christians, by sociologists, and they can show you the statistics.

08:23

And again, I'm not making the argument from statistics. I'm making the point that the created order itself shouts to us about what is whole, beautiful and harmonious sexuality.

08:33

The numbers don't lie. The data is what the data is. The statistics say what they say in terms of the destructive nature of this this sexual choice.

08:44

Now, that's it. Listen, hear me on this. It's not just that sexual choice. We could do statistics and numbers on the destructive nature of adulterous relationships in heterosexual couples, what the devastation is that that causes to the family and to the social order.

09:02

Just hear me on this. I'm not pointing to the failures only in one category. I'm saying that God has designed the world to function a certain way.

09:11

And so both heterosexual sin and homosexual sin are disruptive and hurtful.

09:17

That's what I was getting at, Lizzie, is that I was in consensual relationships sexually with a lot of different women.

09:24

And those relationships hurt people, even though it was consensual. It was disruptive. It was broken.

09:30

It hurt them. It hurt me. And of course, it was a sin against God. But it's very hurtful for everyone.

09:36

It is disruptive. It's so again, the numbers don't like other people. It doesn't mean that they will be hurt by consensual sex.

09:44

Consensual sex can totally hurt people, regret having sex. And it sucks.

09:50

Yeah, it's it's really crappy. But that's not a reason to tell people not to have sex.

09:57

Says who, Lizzie? I'll remind you again where you're supposed to be standing. Nothing is crappy, nothing sucks, nothing is bad.