Being Faithful In Our Speech [James 3:1-12]

I remember the first time I taught this to the ladies in my church, it was very quiet for a long time afterwards, and so maybe we could have duct tape at the book table after this session, but then we won't have a very fun lunch.

But, ladies, we are coming to a session that I think we really need to shore up on, and that is being faithful with our speech, and I believe we as believers need to speak things that are edifying and encouraging one to another and encourage each other in the trials of life, and some of the things that come out of a believer's mouth should not be.

So turn in your Bibles to James 3, James 3, and we're going to look at being faithful with our tongue.

I read an amusing story about a lady who told her pastor that she wanted to put her tongue on the altar, to which he replied,

Madam, there isn't an altar big enough for your tongue. Now, I'm sorry to say, ladies, that we as women have the greater temptation in this area as well as the greatest difficulty to control our speech.

John Calvin said, talkativeness is the disease of women and it gets worse with age, so look what you have to look forward to.

He also said there's nothing more slippery or loose than the tongue, and I believe the power of self -control or the test of self -control many times for us as females is in this area of controlling our speech.

Every one of us in this room have stumbled with this. I'm very thankful for a husband who keeps me on track.

We keep each other on track, and I'm thankful for that. When my daughter was still at home, she's now married, has four kids, but she would also keep me on track.

In fact, I remember one time I was talking on the phone to someone when she was still living at home, and I hung up, and she said,

Mom, do you think that was necessary, what you just said to that lady, and I was like, ugh. So anyway,

I'm thankful for the people in my life that keep me on track. Now, because you and I are going to give an account before God on the day of judgment for every idle word that we speak, we're going to be either justified or condemned by our speech, then we need to keep our tongue under control.

And I believe outside of the Proverbs, probably the strongest portion in the word of God regarding our tongue is the one we're going to look at in this session, and ladies, we need to be faithful.

Certainly, we see today, just turn on the TV and, well, don't turn on your TV, but watch the news or even the programs that are, the tongue is, what is coming out of people's mouths is horrendous, and it's not just in the political world, in our world.

It's among Christians. I mean, what I've heard lately come out of some Christian speakers' mouths is not fit to be spoken.

So I want you to turn, you are in James 1, and we're going to see three things here, the inability to control our tongues, verses 1 to 4, the iniquities of our tongue, there's going to be eight of them, in verses 5 to 8, and lastly, the inconsistency of our tongue.

Let's read the portion together, and before we get into our time, my brethren, be not many teachers, knowing that we'll receive the greater judgment, for in many things we all stumble.

If any man offend not a word, the same is a perfect man, and able to bridle the whole body. Behold, we put bits in the horse's mouth, that they may obey us, and we turn about their whole body.

Behold also the ships, which are so great, and are driven by great winds, yet are they turned about with a very small helm, wherever the pilot willeth.

Even so the tongue is a member, and boasteth great things. Behold how great a matter a little fire kindleth, and the tongue is a fire, a world of iniquity, so is the tongue among our members, that it defileth the whole body, and setteth on fire the course of nature, and is set on fire of hell.

For every kind of birds, and beasts, and serpents of things is tamed, and has been tamed, but the tongue can no man tame. It's unruly evil, full of deadly poison.

Therewith blessed be God, even the Father, therewith cursed be men, who are made in the likeness of God. Out of the same mouth proceed blessing and cursing, my brethren.

These things ought not so to be. Can a fountain send forth at the same place sweet water and bitter?

Can the fig tree, my brethren, bear olive berries, either of vine, figs? So can no fountain yield both salt water and fresh.

Now, James begins by talking to the brethren, the Adolphos, and tells them they should not be many teachers.

The reason being is because in the biblical world, to be a teacher, to be a rabbi, was a position of esteem.

It was an elevated position, and so because of that, many people were rushing into the office of being a teacher, being a pastor, being a rabbi, and they weren't qualified.

Their church services were very informal. They're not like ours. I mean, you all are being very well behaved. I appreciate that, but in the church at Corinth, you know, someone would stand up and say this, someone would do this, and so they would stand up and spout off and all that.

And James says, don't rush into that office of teacher. And ladies, when you think about it, since the primary use or the primary thing that a teacher uses is their, what, their mouth, then he's saying, do not rush into that office of teaching because as a teacher of the word of God, we are responsible not only for what we say with our mouths, but how we live what we say.

In other words, if I don't live out what I'm teaching to you this weekend, I know that,

I mean, this verse always puts the fear of God in me and makes me want to stop doing what I'm doing because I know what

James is saying. I am going to receive a stricter judgment as a teacher of the word of God to women.

I'm going to receive a stricter judgment than you are if you're not a teacher, because my words that I give to you this weekend are meant to give you hope, encouragement, conviction, but I also have to live out what

I teach, right? So that means when Debbie and I leave this afternoon and we go to the Boston airport and our flights delayed or canceled, which often it is, and I'm not going to get to my church tomorrow morning, that means

I have to react to trials just like you do. And if I don't, guess what? I have an accountability person that's right there reminding me of, you know,

Susan, this is God is sovereign and he's in control. And so James says, because of this, don't rush into the office of teaching because you're going to receive a stricter judgment.

John Calvin said this, it would be better for him to fall and break his neck while climbing to the pulpit than to preach the truth without first applying it to his own life.

Now, ladies, if you're offended by my teaching this weekend, I pray it will be because of the convicting power of God's spirit in your life and not because something that I've said that was unguarded or should not have been spoken.

Now, just in case you think, well, I'm off the hook because I'm not a teacher. No, you're not off the hook. Look at verse two.

For many things, we all stumble. Ladies, every one of us, whether you're a teacher or not, has at one time or another said things you shouldn't have said.

We all stumble, right? In fact, this is a universal fact. We all stumble.

The word for stumble here is a moral lapse and it conveys the picture of our foot and you know, we get, we get it caught on something and we trip and we fall and we stumble.

It's a failure in our daily walk, our Christian walk. But after we fall down, we recover and we pick ourselves up and keep going.

A just man falls down seven times, the Bible says, but we get up. And so we all stumble.

We all have said things at one time or another that did not bring glory to God. We've all gossiped.

We've all slandered. We've all used flattery. We've all used un -Christ slang words. We've all done it.

And if we haven't spoken it with our mouth, we've thought it in our minds, right? And God knows what we're thinking. So James says, if anyone does not offend in word, he's perfect.

He's perfect. Now why does James start with our mouth?

Why doesn't he say, if any man doesn't offend with the hands or if any man doesn't offend with their eyes or if any man doesn't offend with their feet, why doesn't he start with that?

Because it is with our words that we express what's in our heart, isn't it?

Remember what Jesus said, out of the abundance of the heart, the mouth speaks. Ladies, whatever is in your heart comes out of your mouth.

Also, when you think about it, do you know your tongue is apt to go places that your feet, hands, and eyes would never take you?

So what are some of the ways in which we offend with our mouth? Gossip, flattery, lying, hurtful, joking, sexual overtones, profanity, harsh words, angry words, negative speech, criticism, boasting of ourselves, putting others down, saying too much.

Proverbs 10, 19 says, in the multitude of words, transgression is unavoidable. So if you're a woman that likes to talk and never likes to close your mouth,

I can guarantee you probably sin a lot with your mouth. Because in the multitude of words, transgression is unavoidable.

One woman, I think it was Elizabeth Elliot, said, if you can't improve on the silence, don't break it. That's pretty good.

Yeah. Praises to God that are not sung from your heart. So as we're singing this weekend, if you're mouthing some words but you're not paying any attention to the words, that's a way that you're sinning with your mouth.

Extremes, like, I never watch TV when you do. Or, I always go to bed at 9 o 'clock when you don't.

Exaggerations. I know one year my husband and I kept each other accountable for our speech because we noticed that when we were with people, you know how sometimes you make a story look just a little bit more colorful?

And I'd say, that's not how that happened. Or he'd say, Susan, that's not how that happened. And so exaggerations, that's a form of offending with our tongue.

It's lying. And so we held each other accountable and we'd say, you're exaggerating.

And that was a little reminder to hone up in on the story and make it correct. UnChristlike slang.

Screwed up. Gee whiz. Golly gosh darn. Have you always looked up those words? I've encouraged women, look those up in the dictionary.

When I was a little girl, if I said those words, my mother put a bar of soap in my mouth. And I remember it impressed me so much.

When my kids did, I did the same thing. And they didn't go on Oprah and complain about their mother washing out their mouth with soap.

I think some of us need to wash our hearts out, you know, with soap. Now, I'm sure

I've left a few out, but you can get the picture, I'm sure. Now, if you're perfect in this area, notice what

James says. If you don't offend in any of these areas, then notice what he says.

You're a perfect man, or in our case, a perfect woman, and you're able to bridle your whole body.

Now, the word perfect here was used, a word that was used for animals that were full grown.

And so it describes a Christian who has attained a maturity of character. She's mature.

She has a knowledge of the word of God. She's reached a goal.

She's not perfect, but she is maturing in her relationship with Christ. And James says, if you do this, if you can control the tongue, not only are you mature in your character in Christ likeness, but you're able to bridle your whole body.

What does that mean? Well, you're able to control your whole body just like a man does a horse by the bridle that he puts in his mouth.

In fact, the bridling here in the Greek means to lead as with a bridle.

It doesn't refer to the actual bridling of the horse, but the leading of the horse to the desired destination through the help of the bridle.

And that's what James saying. If you can control your tongue, then you're able to bridle your whole body.

Control your speech, ladies, and you can control any passion of your body. That's a great diet plan, isn't it?

We should package it, the James 3 diet. You know, we have Weight Watchers, Jenny Craig, and all that stuff. How about the

James 3 diet, you know? Well, the able here in the Greek means a strong, powerful, inner, divine abling.

You're able to control your body. Ladies, it's a divine nature which tells you to stop.

Would Christ say that? And if Christ wouldn't say that, then the perfect woman, the mature woman doesn't say it.

I don't need to say this. This isn't necessary. This person doesn't need to know this. There's no reason for me to say this.

Now, James gives us two powerful illustrations of small but powerful things that can destroy if left to themselves.

A horse without a bit and a ship without a rudder. Look what he says in verse 3. Behold, we put bits in the horses' mouths that they may obey us, and we turn about their whole body.

Now, the horse would be a well -known animal to the biblical reader, the ones who are listening to this epistle be read.

But horses in the New Testament times were very different. They were mainly used for war.

So you would have this prancing war horse mainly in the mind of the person who's reading this epistle, more so than a humble plow horse that just kind of trods along.

And when you think about it, the prancing war horse, the horses they would use for military, would be more likely need to be fit with that bridle, right?

To be controlled. Now, they tell us the average horse weighs 1 to 2 ,000 pounds.

That's a lot. 1 to 2 ,000 pounds, and yet it can be controlled by a bit that only weighs 2 pounds.

So you have this 2 ,000 -pound animal that can be controlled by a 2 -pound bit.

And the point is this. We put that little bit in the horse's mouth, and we can make him go to the right.

We can make him go to the left. We can make him go straight. We can make him go where we want to go, right, for the most part.

In fact, that same trip where my son fell and sliced his head, there was another lady riding in the car with us, and about two hours before my son had his thing, her daughter was riding a horse.

She rides horse for fun, and it came to the thing, and it wouldn't go anywhere, and it stopped and threw her off the horse, and she hurt her back and her neck, and they had to check her for a concussion.

It's the third time she's been thrown from a horse. But most of the time, we can make the horse go where we want to go, right?

Now, ladies, notice according to this verse, the horse does not bridle himself, right?

Have you ever seen a horse bridle itself? No. Someone else has to bridle him. Ladies, when it comes to us, it's

God who fits us with the bridle and leads us in the right path. We must have that power that comes from somebody bigger than us.

And ladies, it's that inner ability that James just mentioned. We can't control our tongues, even though we have to do our part.

It must be an inner divine enabling and help by the Holy Spirit.

Now, when God does bridle us, he doesn't expect us to act like a horse.

It's only obedient because we're being forced. But rather to see that bridle in our mouth as for our benefit, right?

Because we love God. Ladies, no wonder David says, set a watch, O Lord, before my mouth.

Keep the door of my lips. Well, James goes on to say we put the bit in the horse's mouth so that they will obey us.

Why do we put that bit in the horse's mouth? So they'll obey us. They'll do what we say. In fact, he says we can turn them around.

In other words, we turn around the whole direction of the way they're going. And ladies, that's why

God wants to bridle us. We're going down this way, and I'm gossiping, I'm flattering, I'm telling dirty jokes,

I'm doing all this. And God puts that bridle in our mouth, that bit.

And why? So that I can turn around and go this way and start speaking things that are encouraging, edifying, building people up.

That's what I'm supposed to use my mouth for. So ladies, two goals in controlling our tongue should be obedience to God and a turnaround for our whole life.

An uncontrolled tongue leads to sin, guilt, and shame. A controlled tongue leads to peace, power, and victory.

Well, James not only compares our tongue with a bridled horse, but now he compares it with a great ship.

Notice what he says. Behold the ships. They're so great. Driven by fierce winds.

Yet they're turned about with a very small helm wherever the pilot wills. Now, in the biblical world, there were also some very big ships.

Not like, you know, some of the cruise ships that we see today. I don't know if you've ever been on a cruise. My husband and I, we don't really like them, but we've been on a couple.

But they're very big. But even in the biblical world, there were some big ships.

In fact, we know in Acts 27 that the ship that Paul was on that was shipwrecked, it carried 276 passengers.

In addition to all the cargo, which it probably would have weighed between, they tell us, 400 to 2 ,000 tons.

I mean, that's a big ship. And in fact, James says, behold, or lo, wow.

In other words, the ship is a bigger illustration than even the horse.

Because ships are so large. And he says, behold the ships. They're so great in comparison to the rudder, or your translation might say the helm.

Now, the ancient rudder or helm was made in the shape of an oar and was connected to the ship's stern.

And it was very, very small in comparison to a ship that could weigh up to 2 ,000 tons.

And so the winds would come. And we know, according to Acts 27, that the winds blew the ship and crashed it up and everything.

We know that from Jonah too. I just was teaching that to my ladies last week. And we know that, of course,

Jonah was responsible for that. And they had to throw him overboard. But a great wind came and blew the ship around and all that.

And so these ships would be driven by fierce winds. And unlike the horses, they had no will of their own.

The ship would get out of control without the guiding power of the pilot who had control of the helm or the rudder.

But he could turn the ship wherever he wanted to go. It's interesting, the word here for pilot is a noun, actually, which means to guide straight.

In other words, ladies, we can commit our tongues to the one who guides us straight. And isn't it interesting that both the horse and the ship,

James says, are turned about? Both of them go in the wrong direction. The horse go in the wrong direction.

The ship going the wrong direction. But with the rider or the pilot, they turn around and they go a different direction.

There's repentance. Ladies, that's what repentance is. You're going this way with a certain life -dominating sin in your life, whether it's your tongue or something else, anger, bitterness, whatever, lying.

You're going this way. And repentance is what? You turn around and you go completely the opposite direction.

Ladies, we as humans are like ships many times. We have many loads and burdens to carry, many fierce circumstances that come into our lives.

We talked about trials in the last session. But if you have a good tongue, you can go through these things blamelessly.

Well, just as the bit and rudder are small objects in relation to the horse and ship, so is our tongue in relation to our body.

Look what James says in verse 5. Even your tongue is a little member and boasts great things. Behold, how great a matter, a little fire kindleth.

Ladies, James is now going to give us eight iniquities of our tongue. And if these don't motivate you to be godly with your speech, then

I do not know what will. The first thing he says about our tongue, it boasts great things.

Now, did you know the average tongue is three inches long and one and a half inches wide? Even though my husband says

I have one of the biggest tongues he's ever seen. Maybe it has to do with my weird body. I don't know.

Maybe I have enough tongues for two people. I don't know. But three and a half inches long and one and a half inches wide.

Now, ladies, that is little in comparison to our bodies, which average, you know, 5 '4", 5 '6".

And we weigh, well, not me, but we weigh anywhere from 100 to 200 pounds.

So the tongue is petite. It's little. And yet it's powerful.

It's one of the most powerful members of our body. And it's also the largest troublemaker, right?

And James says, notice, this is the first thing, it boasts great things. Do you know your tongue seems to be conscious of its influence and power and boasts great things?

How great we are. In fact, my son one time when he was at the Master's College or Seminary, I forget which one, but he went to, what's that guy's name?

See, I knew I should never deviate from my notes. But the guy, Shuler, went to Shuler's church just to see what it was like.

He said, Mom, Uncle, Charles, what are you going there for? He goes, Well, I just want to go see what it's like. So I remember that afternoon we talked, and he said,

Mom, you know what we sang? We sang a song about how great we were. And I said, Charles, and you stood there, and, you know, you sat there.

You should have, you know, fleed out the building. But, ladies, that's what our tongue does, how great we are.

And we're living in a very narcissistic culture. It's all about me. Everything's about me. We boast of ourselves.

Ladies, David says, My soul will make her boast in the Lord. And we need to quit talking about ourselves and talk about the greatness of our

God. James goes on to say, Behold, how great a matter a little fire kindleth.

In other words, wow, how great a forest is set aflame by such a small fire.

Now, ladies, when James says this, the readers would be very familiar with this terminology because the land of Palestine was known for its drought, long, dry, hot summers that produced forest fires.

And we know this. I mean, you know, California the last few years, horrible forest fires.

Or if you study any history at all, you remember the Chicago Fire in 1871 happened by what?

A cow that kicked over a lantern, right? And, I mean, the damage that it did to Chicago was unbelievable.

And many of us have seen this. Somebody throws a cigarette out the window as they're traveling down the highway and it sets a forest on fire.

And, ladies, so can a word spoken by our tongue. Wow, behold, how great a matter a little fire kindleth.

Ladies, our uncontrolled tongues can set our neighborhood on fire. I mean, I have a lady in my neighborhood.

She's known as the neighborhood gossip. She knows everything about everybody. She can set my whole neighborhood on fire with her tongue.

Our church, you can set your church on fire with your tongue. I heard recently about a pastor's wife and her husband had to resign because she was slandering all the elders.

She set that whole church on fire. You can set your marriage on fire with your tongue.

Do you know you can ruin someone's entire life by the power of your tongue? We're seeing that now in the political world.

How much of this stuff that we're hearing, is it true? Is it not true? I mean, I don't even know what's true anymore in the political world.

But all the candidates are ruining the other candidate by the power of their tongue.

In fact, do you know that 10 minutes of unbridled temper with your tongue can waste enough strength to do a half day of wholesome work?

10 minutes of unbridled speech, anger, whatever you want to use your tongue for, is enough energy that you need to do a half a day of housework.

That's how much energy you exert. I think some of us need to keep our mouths shut and instead use that energy to clean our homes, right?

Ladies, our physical energy is a gift from God, isn't it? What a waste to use that energy to speak things in anger when we could be using that energy for something else.

In fact, they tell us a physician can tell a lot about how we're doing physically by what? What do they do?

Stick out your tongue, right? I want to see down your throat. Do you know that is the same way with our spiritual physician?

He can tell how we're doing spiritually by what? Looking at our tongues to see what we're saying.

And I'm afraid some of what our Lord sees is what Paul describes in Romans 3, 13 and 14, an open grave, deceptive, poisonous like a snake full of cursing bitterness.

Ladies, these things should not be coming out of our mouth. Jesus says our mouth speaks what's in our heart, right?

Evil thoughts, murders, adulterers, fornications, thieves, false witnesses, blasphemies. Those are the things that defile us.

Well, all three of the examples that James gives the horse, the ship and the tongue are destroyed when left to themselves without someone to control them.

The ship needs a sailor, the horse needs a rider and your tongue needs a savior.

So just in case you haven't got the message, James goes on to say in verse 6, the tongue is a fire.

This is a second characteristic or iniquity of your tongue. It's a fire. Now to speak of the tongue as a fire was an

Old Testament concept. Proverbs 16 27 says this, an ungodly man digs up evil and in his lips.

There is as a burning fire. Now ladies, James is using a fire as a metaphor to describe our tongues destructive nature.

If left uncontrolled, it is like a deadly fire. And I know the first 10 years of my marriage.

I was not a believer and after God saved me at the age of 30. I done a lot of damage with my tongue a lot.

I had a temper. I mean, if you don't believe me, ask my husband. He used to say he was going to put on my tombstone. She did it her way.

So that kind of tells you and I tore my house down brick by brick by my uncontrolled temper.

I had a horrible temper and I said things to my husband. I mean after God saved me at the age of 30,

I had to go in and repent of so much and just horrible things and that I had said to him in a fit of rage.

It's like a deadly fire and it's not only a fire. But James gives us a third care is characteristic of our tongue.

He says it's a world of iniquity. What does that mean? Well, when he uses the word world, it's viewed as this present world system ladies.

Our tongue is a system of iniquity a system of evil.

This present world that you and I live in this faithless generation that you and I live in is opposed to God.

Have you noticed that? They're opposed to God. I mean, we're still sort of Christian, but we're getting away from that.

This world is responsive to Satan and James is saying the tongue is unjust and unrighteous in character and fallen man shows himself to be a part of this evil system by using his tongue to express the evils that are in his heart.

Ladies as a Christian are sanctified tongue should condemn unrighteousness, but an evil tongue will compliment it.

It will flatter it. It will make it appear righteous. Well, James goes on to give us the fourth description of our tongue.

He says it defiles the whole body defiles the whole body. It pollutes your body like a moral leprosy does like cancer.

It influences all the members Debbie and I have a friend that has pancreatic cancer and she just was at MD Anderson a few days ago and her whole body is full of cancer.

That's what James say. It can defile your whole body and isn't it interesting

James says a bridal tongue controls our body and yet a nun by bridal tongue. What defiles the whole body defiles the whole body ladies a filthy tongue makes for a filthy person and not only that but number five

James says it sets on fire. The course of nature sets on fire the course of nature.

Now, what does that mean? Well, the course of nature actually means a wheel of nature.

What James is saying here is the moment you were born your life started going right?

It's like a wheel and the older I get the faster that wheel goes. I mean, it's like really where does time go?

I don't know. And so life is presented here as a wheel. And so, you know, you're going around, you know with that wheel of life.

That's turning and turning and turning and some of us are going through life making constant evil with our tongue and more thinking, you know, nothing's going to ever stop me.

I'm just going to keep using my tongue for evil. James says you're a fool. You don't stop and think that your tongue affects everything that you touch.

You don't realize that wheel of life is going to catch fire and then you're going to have to stop and think of the consequences of your tongue.

The more it burns the faster it resolves to the whole wheel spins in a blaze spitting fire in all directions.

That's what James is saying. It's a it's a world of iniquity. It's it sets on fire the course of nature, but ladies the time is only a fuse.

The source of the deadly fire is hell and that is the sixth description James gives us. It is set on fire of hell.

Now the term for hell here is Gehenna, which would be known to the Jew as a literal place.

The Jews would offer their children to the God of Moloch. They would actually burn them alive in the fire. It also became a place where they would burn trash and dung and you know, it's just putrefying if you've ever been to India.

That's kind of the smell you smell when you get off the plane. It's just putrefying and so Gehenna or the

Valley of Gehenna became an image of the place of everlasting torment, which was hell. It burned all the time, burned flesh, burned rubbish, burned humans, burned children.

The fire never went out. It continually burned. And the idea here that James is trying to get across to us is the tongue can do so much evil that wheel that spins and yet it gets its origin from what?

Hell. That's where it comes from. Ladies, nothing could better characterize much of what our tongue does and to say it has its origin in hell and it has the spirit that reigns there.

Did you know Satan is behind all evil speech? Satan is behind all evil speech.

John 8 44 says you're of the father the devil when he speaks a lie. He speaks of his own for he is a liar and he is the father of it.

So anytime we use our tongues for evil. We're allowing Satan.

We're might as well say, hey, you know, can't say the devil made me do it. But that's where it's coming from. Ladies, all evil talk has its beginning in hell and can cause your whole body to burn in hell.

If we do not put that off. Well, James, in fact, Jesus says in Matthew five, we won't turn there.

But in Matthew five, he says, it'd be better that one of your members be cut off than for your whole body to be cast in hell.

Remember, he told the Jews, if you're right, I offend you. Pluck it out and cast it from you for it's better to what?

Go into heaven without your eye than to spend eternity in hell. If your right arm offends you, cut it off. Cast it from you.

It's better to go into heaven without an arm than to have your whole body be cast into hell. And some of us may need to cut out our tongue.

So there'd be better to enter into heaven without a tongue than our whole body be cast into hell. Well, James goes on to say in verse seven.

He says for every kind of beast and of birds and of serpents and of things is in the sea is tamed and has been tamed by mankind.

Interesting. James says even animals can be controlled, but the tongue is untamable.

He says every kind of animal. In fact, every animal he mentions here would describe any type of animal you could think of.

Beasts, birds, serpents, things in the sea. And James says we can tame every animal.

This means we can subdue them. We can control them. In fact, we know from Genesis 126 that man was given dominion over the animal world.

The fish of the sea, the fowl of the air. God gave us the ability to control them. We can subdue these animals.

In fact, we see a lot of them in the zoo, don't we? We can subdue almost any animal. We can capture. We can put it in the zoo and take our children there and pay lots of money, and we can go see these animals.

Now, it doesn't mean we can make pets out of all of them. And believe me, there are some I wouldn't want, even though my husband at one time wanted to get a snake and call it

Satan. And he wanted to keep it in his office in the church. And a lot of ladies were threatening to leave the church if he did that.

So I'm thankful he never got that snake named Satan. But we can control them.

We can even capture snakes, can't we? And we can put them in cages, and we go look at them at the zoo.

In fact, the power of man to be able to capture and control these animals is unbelievable.

And yet, even though this is very remarkable, James says we can't control our tongue.

Look, no man, verse 8, no man can control the tongue. Ladies, only

God can. Only God can help us control our tongue. Now, this doesn't mean that we're always out of control with our tongues.

But ladies, you're never going to have permanent mastery over your tongue. You won't.

Not even the disciples had perfectly tame tongues. Remember Peter? Even if I must die with you,

I will never deny you. What a bunch of hogwash. Because then he used that same tongue, what?

To deny the Lord three times. In fact, even cursed. I don't know the man.

What are you talking about? Or think of John who said, little children love one another. Little children love one another.

And then what did he do with that same tongue? Call down fire from heaven and blast this Samaritan village out of existence, he told

Jesus. Remember, Jesus says, oh, you don't know what you're talking about. The Son of Man didn't come to destroy but save.

So he used that same tongue to want Jesus to call fire down from heaven. Ladies, no one can tame the tongue.

It requires supernatural power from God to tame our tongue. Well, James gives a seventh characteristic of our tongue.

It's an unruly evil. An evil without restraint. Unruly evil.

Interesting word. The word unruly means restless. And it characterizes our tongue as fickle and inconsistent.

Do you know your tongue cannot stay properly in its place? It always wants to break out.

You know those lions at the zoo that are always going, have you ever seen them pace back and forth?

That's a good description of your tongue. It's always wanting to get out of your mouth. Ladies, it's possible to secure the animal so he can't get out but not the tongue.

Well, the last description James gives of our tongue is it's full of deadly poison. Full of deadly poison.

The picture here seems to be of a venomous snake bite. It's the figure of a tongue of a venomous snake right before he strikes.

And also poison here is translated as an arrow indicating the human tongue has the ability to shoot arrows at each other.

Ladies, and notice our tongues are not half full of poison but James says they're full of deadly poison.

Now, I don't know about you but when I think of something that is full, I think of something that has no more room in it.

It's full of deadly poison. Ladies, that is a sad commentary on our tongues.

You know, most of us in this room would never think of intentionally putting poison in our mouth or poisoning our families even though that child that I told you about, she did poison her mother's drink several times to try to kill her.

But most of us in this room would not think of intentionally trying to poison. In fact, Debbie, make sure my cup has a lid on it during lunch hour because after this session they may want to poison my drink.

But oh well. Anyway, but most of us would not think of doing that, right? I don't want to poison you.

You don't want to poison me. I don't want to poison my family, my grandchildren. And yet we will poison our meals with gossip, you know, about our family, church members.

Now, sometimes we may not be aware of what we're saying if it falls under the category of ungodly speech or not.

So I want to just quickly, four areas for women especially that I think we need to be reminded of.

And this certainly isn't an exhaustive list. But I mentioned one, gossip. Gossip is idle talk.

It's not always true about other people. Did you know Sally's father abused her?

That's just gossip. It's just idle talk. Did you hear about Bill? I've heard he's had 10 car accidents now, you know.

That's one area. Flattery. Flattery is something I think women are very guilty of.

This means to praise too much or beyond what is true, to praise insincerely.

I just love being with you when you don't. Or I sure like your haircut or your dress.

That's sure attractive when you don't really like it at all. In fact, at times,

I don't do this anymore, but when I first started traveling and I'd come back home and ladies in my church would say, I sure missed you while you were gone.

And I thought, I didn't even think about you. I'm sorry I was too busy, but I didn't say that. So I was asking another lady who disciples me.

I said, what should I say that's truthful? I don't want to be flattery and, you know, be giving flattery and saying, oh,

I missed you too when I didn't. And she helped me to come up with some good things to say that were truthful.

Ladies, flattery is saying to a person's face what you would never say behind his or her back.

Now, criticism is another one I think women struggle with, which is unfavorable remarks or judgments, finding fault with people.

A good example of this is when Moses, remember, went to spy out the land which God gave and sent out those 12 spies, and they came back and gave an unfavorable report, and it caused the whole congregation to grumble and complain.

Or Miriam and Aaron who criticized Moses for marrying an Ethiopian woman. And remember, God struck

Miriam with leprosy. That's a high price to pay, right, for criticism. Slander is another one

I think we as women are guilty of. This is a false report meant to do harm to the good name and reputation of another person.

I don't have to give you an illustration of that because we can see it right now in the political world. There's lots of slander going on.

It's horrible. Wouldn't it be great if we had a presidential candidate that was just saying nothing but good things about the other person?

In fact, I don't know if any of you saw the last debate, but I thought the last question was very telling. Do any of you have one good thing you can say about the other person?

Did you all see that? I was like, that's a great question. Do you have anything good you can say about your opponent?

Ladies, a good question perhaps would be here when you're thinking about your speech. Would I say this about this person if they were standing here?

And if you wouldn't say it, then you probably shouldn't say it. If you wouldn't say it if they were standing there, you probably shouldn't say it.

Well, quickly, James moves from the characteristics of our tongues to now the inconsistencies of our tongue in verses 9 to 12.

He says, Therewith blessed be God, even the Father, and therewith cursed be men who are made after this likeness of God.

It's interesting. Every time the Jew would say God's name, they would immediately say, Blessed is

He. Blessed is He. Blessed is He. In fact, the Jews, if they were walking along and they saw a piece of parchment on the ground or something, they wouldn't even step on it because they were fearful it might have

God's name on it, and that would be defaming to the name of God. And evidently,

James, who was the pastor there at Jerusalem, he saw this contradiction because any time they would say

God, Blessed is He. Blessed is He. Oh, yeah. Blessed be God. And then they'd turn around and look down on their fellow man.

They'd use their tongue to criticize or gossip or whatever, and he saw this inconsistency.

And, ladies, we do the same, don't we? We come to church on Sunday. We praise His name.

We celebrate His name. We rarely speak evil of the name of God. We sing about Him. We talk about Him.

We bless Him. And yet, out of that same mouth on the way home from church, we use that same mouth to hopefully not curse the driver next to you, but some people do.

I've been with some Christians who've actually cursed drivers that pulled out in front of them or will criticize the pastor's sermon or will, you know, criticize somebody that was just at church.

And James says we will curse men who are made in the likeness of God. Yeeks. Ladies, to curse a man is to insult the

God whose likeness he bears. The idea is this. We look up to God. We bless Him. We thank Him.

We adore Him. We worship Him. And then I look at you and I go, ugh, are you kidding me?

I look down at you, think I'm better than you, gossip about you, slander, flattery.

James goes on to say out of the same mouth proceeds blessing and cursing. Ladies, this is a fatal inconsistency because the praise to God that I just gave loses its character and it becomes tainted with bitterness and cursing.

James says, my brethren, these things ought not so to be. My sisters, these things ought not so to be.

James says it's not right. It's not right. What advantage is it anyway? Have you thought about that?

What advantage is it? It will not affect God in His judgment towards that person, right?

And it's not going to profit the man that you're cursing or gossiping about or the woman. And it's not going to do any good to you except bring judgment on you.

Ladies, the tongue that blesses the Father and curses men made in God's image is in trouble.

How easy it is to sing on Sunday morning. Oh, for a thousand tongues to sing my great Redeemer's praise and then get in the car and fight all the way home or play roast the preacher.

You know what that is? Roast the preacher. I know I'm a preacher's daughter and a preacher's wife. I know what that is.

Or spend time with your Christian friends. You know, you're going to be with your friends today. And then you get in your car and curse the driver.

You know, that just cut you off in traffic. Or spend time in the morning with God in prayer and in His word and then come out of your closet and get angry with your husband or your kids on the phone and say things that you shouldn't say.

My sisters, these things ought not so to be. But you say, Susan, you don't know my situation.

You don't know my husband. You don't know my kids. You don't know my situation. I can't control myself.

I remember an illustration one time that was given that really helped me a lot by Jay Adams who is a,

I think he's almost about to go to glory, but he was involved in the biblical counseling movement.

And I remember I went to a conference where he said this, you know, a husband and wife are screaming and yelling at each other and fighting, you know, and the phone rings and it's the pastor and the wife picks up the phone and she says,

Hello? Yes, everything's fine. And he uses that in illustration.

We can control ourselves. We just choose not to control ourselves. We choose to give in to that anger.

Now, maybe some of you like getting angry. Maybe some of you like gossiping and slandering. I have seen people that seem to enjoy that.

Ladies, friendships have been broken and destroyed because of the tongue. Couples have divorced because of their tongue.

Tragic things have occurred in people's lives that otherwise could have been prevented if only someone would have controlled their tongue.

Proverbs 18, 21 puts it well. Death and life are in the power of the tongue. Death and life are in the power of the tongue.

Well, James now turns to the realm of nature as he often does in his epistle. Maybe that's why I like it so much because I love nature.

To prove this inconsistency is wrong. Does a fountain send forth at the same place sweet water and bitter?

Ladies, this question calls for a negative answer. And James uses the picture here of a fountain or a spring as an analogy to the human heart.

Now, they had fountains in the biblical world just like we do now. And imagine a traveler, you know, walking and, you know, they would walk, the average traveler in the biblical world would walk 20 miles a day because they didn't have cars and planes and all the stuff we travel on.

And they'd walk 20 miles a day and imagine they're coming across and here's a mountain, here's a fountain. Ah, so thirsty.

And they go and it's this yummy sweet water and all of a sudden it turns bitter. That's inconsistent.

That doesn't happen. Now, James isn't denying there might be a sweet fountain and a bitter fountain but out of the same opening doesn't come sweet water and bitter water.

And that's what he's saying about our mouth. Out of the same mouth should not come sweet speech and bitter speech.

And not only that, but he asks a second question regarding nature to prove his point. Can a fig tree, my brother, bear olive berries?

And a vine, a fig, so can no fountain yield both salt water and fresh.

Interesting from the plant life, he uses three of the most common plants in the Jewish world, a fig tree, an olive tree, and a grape vine.

In fact, all three were used in the Old Testament to describe the Jewish nation. And each of these plants produce according to its own nature, right?

Fig trees, what? They bear figs. Figs, they do not bear olives. Olives don't produce grapes.

Now, I know in our world we're crossbreeding. Have you ever seen broccoli flower? Like what? Broccoli flower.

They have gotten broccoli and cauliflower and put them together and it's broccoli flower. But ladies, broccoli is still broccoli.

Cauliflower is still cauliflower. I'm sorry. James ends his passage by saying, so can no fountain yield both salt water and fresh.

Ladies, a fresh heart cannot produce bitter speech. Your speech reveals who you truly are.

Well, it's interesting. James does not draw any conclusions from these examples. They're obvious, right?

There's no inconsistency in nature with the fountains. There's no inconsistency in nature with the vines, the figs, the olive trees.

And there should be no inconsistencies in our tongue. In fact, picture with me the following scenario.

A large family sitting around the table for breakfast one morning. As the custom was, the father bows his head, give thanks to God for the food.

Right after he raises his head, he begins to grumble about the hard times, the poor quality of the food he's eating, the way it was cooked, and everything else.

His little daughter interrupted and looked up and she said, Daddy, do you suppose God heard what you said a little while ago in your prayer?

Certainly, he said. Well, did he also hear what you said about the bacon and the coffee?

Of course, the father said. Then the little girl said, Then Father, which did

God believe? And ladies, I think probably that's the way it's often in our

Christian homes. We speak well of God in prayer, we bless his name, and then we lift our heads and complain about what we don't have or what we still think we need to have in order to be happy.

These are strong words from this little book, and it should cause us all to think long and hard before we use our tongues for evil.

It is dangerous when left uncontrolled. Ladies, if you want to be faithful in a faithless world, you need to control your tongue.

If your speech is no better today than it was a year ago, then something is not right. In fact,

James already has said, we didn't have time to look at it, in James 1 .26, if any man among you seems to be religious and cannot bridle his tongue, his religion is vain.

In other words, you don't have it. It's vain, it's empty, it's dead, you don't have it. A sign of Christian maturity is controlling your tongue, keeping it from complaining, fault -finding, backbiting, slandering, gossiping, lying, exaggerating, cursing.

So quickly, I know I ran over just a little bit, but I want to give you three helps in closing by way to help you to gain victory over your tongue.

The first thing that we need to do is admit our difficulty to God. Ladies, that's the thing we need to do any time the

Holy Spirit shows us a sin that we need to put off. Admit it. That's the first step.

Confess your sin. Tell the Lord. Say with Isaiah, I'm undone,

I'm ruined, I'm a man of unclean lips. Ladies, when we see our speech in light of God's omnipresence, then it should bring us to our knees in confession of our sins and dependence on him.

Secondly, the second thing after you've admitted, Lord, I'm a gossip, I slander,

I'm angry, whatever it is, admit it. True, genuine Christians confess their sins.

Secondly, pray. Pray. There must be an ongoing prayerfulness. Pray, Lord, keep my tongue from evil.

Set a guard over my mouth. In fact, I knew a lady one time that she actually put that on her telephone.

She put it on her telephone. Determine not to... You know, you might have that be your screensaver on your smartphone.

Determine not to criticize. Don't receive or give gossip. Don't lie. Don't boast.

In fact, many of you know Elizabeth George, she writes women's books, and she said that she had such a problem, in one of her books she mentioned she had such a problem with gossip that she didn't talk on the phone for three months until she could control it.

Find someone who will hold you accountable and pray for you. Did I give you the third help?

Regard to discipline yourself regarding the use of your tongue. Resolve to discipline yourself regarding the use of your tongue.

What I mean by that, just determine not to. Find someone to hold you accountable. As I mentioned earlier, my husband, my daughter, she doesn't live with me anymore.

She's married and has four kids. But listen, I'm around enough women that would bop me over the head, so I'm thankful for that.

And they know, hold me accountable. Find someone to hold you accountable, to pray for you, to help you, to be willing to point out those areas that are not pleasing to the

Lord. Ladies, our tongues are the smallest members but the largest troublemakers. The tongue is contained in your mouth, surrounded by your lips and your teeth, and yet it escapes.

It must be controlled if you want to be a faithful woman in a faithless age. You know, the unsaved world that we're living in should look at us and see that we're different.

We should not be the ones they hear yelling at our kids in the grocery store. We should not be the ones they hear tearing down our husbands.

We should not be the ones they hear telling off -color jokes. We should not be the ones they hear gossiping, slandering, screaming, yelling, complaining, arguing.

Ladies, let us allow God to use our tongues to direct the world into eternal life and to delight other believers in the trials of their life.

Let's use our tongues to speak things that are gracious, things that are edifying, things that build up.

Well, speaking of words, it's said that we speak 18 ,000 to 20 ,000 words in a day.

That's a lot. We spend one -fifth of our life talking. That's scary.

So, you know, in a year's time, that is 6 ,800 -page books that you've written with your mouth.

Have you stopped to examine lately what you're saying with your 18 ,000 to 20 ,000 words a day?

But perhaps a more important question is this. Will you be justified by your words on that day, or will you be condemned?

Let's pray. Oh, Father, I pray for each of us, including myself,

Lord, that you would help us to keep our tongues from evil and our lips from speaking deceit.

Father, I pray that you would set a watch over our mouths, keep the door of our lips,

God. Help us to be women who are wise. Help us to be as the Proverbs 31 woman.

When she opened her mouth, the law of kindness was on her tongue. And, Father, I know this doesn't mean that we don't ever get righteously angry, we don't ever confront people when they're in sin, but,

Lord, help us to put off the areas of our speech that are sinful and displeasing to you.

And, Lord, we know we can't do this. Your Word says no man can tame the tongue, and we can't without that inner divine abling that you give us.

And so, Father, help us to be guided by the Spirit of God, and I pray,

Spirit of God, that you would convict us when we are saying things or getting ready to say something that we should not say.

So, Father, give us grace in the remaining hours to come, and I do pray, Lord, that in this wicked world we live in, that people would listen to our speech and know that we're different, that we might have opportunities for the gospel.