June 22, 2021 Show with Mark Chanski on “Encouragement: Adrenaline for the Soul”

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June 23, 2021

June 22, 2021 MARK CHANSKI, author, Pastor of Harbor Reformed Baptist Church of Holland, Michigan & Coordinator of the Reformed Baptist Network, who will address: “ENCOURAGEMENT: ADRENALINE FOR THE SOUL!”

00:04: Live from the historic parsonage of the 19th century gospel minister George Norcross in downtown
00:10: Carlisle, Pennsylvania, it's Iron Sharpens Iron. This is a radio platform in which pastors,
00:23: Christian scholars, and theologians address the burning issues facing the church and the world today.
00:31: Proverbs chapter 27 verse 17 tells us iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another.
00:38: Matthew Henry said that in this passage we are cautioned to take heed with whom we converse and directed to have in view in conversation, to make one another wiser and better.
00:50: It is our hope that this goal will be accomplished over the next two hours, and we hope to hear from you, the listener, with your own questions, and now here's your host,
01:00: Chris Arnzen. Good afternoon,
01:10: Cumberland County, Pennsylvania, Lake City, Florida, and the rest of humanity living on the planet Earth who are listening to the live streaming at ironsharpensirenradio .com.
01:20: This is Chris Arnzen, your host of Iron Sharpens Iron Radio, wishing you all a happy Tuesday on this 22nd day of June 2021.
01:30: I'm thrilled to have back on the program Mark Chansky, who is an author, he's the pastor of Harbor Reform Baptist Church of Holland, Michigan, and he's also the new coordinator of the
01:42: Reform Baptist Network. Today we are going to be addressing his latest book, Encouragement Adrenaline for the
01:49: Soul, and it's my honor and privilege to welcome you back to Iron Sharpens Iron Radio, Pastor Mark Chansky.
01:56: Chris, thank you so much for having me again, always a pleasure, appreciate your insightful interviewing and thankful for your show.
02:04: Thank you, brother, it means a lot. And tell our listeners about Harbor Reform Baptist Church of Holland, Michigan.
02:11: Harbor Reform Baptist Church, well, we were planted back in 1993 when we had 10 families come from the
02:25: Reform Baptist Church of Grand Rapids, Michigan, which was the now Grace Emanuel Reform Baptist Church, but back then we were a
02:33: Reform Baptist Church at Grand Rapids. We had planted there in Grand Rapids a number of churches, one in Louisville, Kentucky, one in Minneapolis, Minnesota, one in Lethbridge, Alberta, one in Sault Ste.
02:49: Marie, Michigan, and even a couple of others. But then we thought, let's see if we can plant a church more close by, as there were a number of people who were coming from the lakeshore near Lake Michigan.
03:01: And so we decided to take 10 families as a core and went out about 45 minutes away to Holland, Michigan, and there we began meeting in a gymnasium, and the
03:16: Lord prospered us. We constituted in 1994, we got our own building in 1997, and we've been there now for 27 years, just celebrated our 27th year anniversary this last
03:31: Memorial Day weekend, and we can say our God, our help in ages past is our hope for years to come.
03:38: He's been so faithful to us. He's built us up and strengthened us. Praise God.
03:44: If anybody wants to find out more information about Harbor Reform Baptist Church of Holland, Michigan, go to harbourchurchholland .org.
03:53: That's harbourchurchholland .org. Now, let us know about this organization for which you have been just recently appointed as coordinator, the
04:05: Reform Baptist Network. Yes, the Reform Baptist Network really began,
04:11: I would say, back in 2015. There was a group of churches,
04:16: Reform Baptists, 1689 churches, who held to the confession and had a light, precious faith, and our desire was that we would constitute a fellowship of churches who would be based for the purpose of having fellowship together so we can strengthen each other, but not only just strengthen each other with fellowship, but our churches might be muscular with churches in California and Michigan and Florida and New York and Texas and beyond, but also so that we could, as churches, band together for the purpose of going on kingdom adventures and fulfilling the
05:04: Great Commission. So our desire is to plant churches, our desire is to send off missionaries, so planting churches not only domestically in the
05:14: USA, but also globally all throughout the world. So we got together, and our desire was to be outward -looking.
05:26: Our chief verse of focus would be Habakkuk 2 .14, where it says, For the earth will be filled with the knowledge of the glory of the
05:35: Lord as the waters cover the sea. That's our hope. That's our ambition. So the
05:41: Reformed Baptist Network is gathered together so that we can glorify God through fellowship and cooperation in fulfilling the
05:50: Great Commission to the ends of the earth. So we now have 47 churches, as it snowballed from a smaller group, began,
06:00: I think it was 2017, we had our first General Assembly in Taylors, South Carolina.
06:09: Mark Dever was our keynote speaker, and 26 churches gathered together.
06:16: We've added churches to the point where we're 47, and we have a General Assembly coming up in Jackson, Mississippi, just in their suburbs, and Brandon, Mississippi, Grace Church of Castlewoods, and we'll be meeting there, and we hope to have over 50 churches in our fellowship, and then also we are having a number of other pastors coming in who are spying out the land, and we are very hopeful that we will be adding in the next couple, three years, many more churches, as the
06:49: Lord seems to really be prospering this fellowship of churches and this vision that we have to expand the kingdom, not simply be together and hold a common faith, but also to work together for a common commission.
07:07: Great. Well, if anybody wants more information about this organization, go to reformedbaptistnetwork .com,
07:15: reformedbaptistnetwork .com. Now, let us begin our discussion on this book that you have written.
07:23: Obviously, I think this is going to be a book that people of all walks of life, of all roles in the church, whether they are a pastor, an elder, a deacon, or just your average member of a church, encouragement seems to be something sorely lacking in the lives of many that brings discouragement to many.
07:53: Sometimes there is a very good reason for that discouragement, meaning that there is a lack of encouragement to the individual, a lack of proper encouragement, and sometimes it may be, and you and I have to admit, it may be because the person is so self -absorbed that they get easily discouraged when they are not being constantly praised.
08:18: But tell us... That's exactly right, Chris. That's exactly right, and I think that an initial response from people who are
08:27: Reformed may well be, boy, why would we have a book written on encouragement?
08:34: We live in this snowflake society where everybody wants to be pampered, and if all could be, if you're going to write a book, why not write a book about the gospel?
08:45: Why write a book about encouragement? I mean, that sounds like something that an ego -stroking, motivational speaker would address.
08:54: And I really do, Chris, I understand the reaction of some who would say, man, I thought this
09:00: Chris Armisen, iron -sharpening iron. This isn't ego -stroking ego.
09:09: I know there may be some people out there thinking that. I understand that. In fact, I even think of David Murray, he talks about Christians and their reluctance to give encouragement.
09:22: Listen to what Murray writes, and he really understands the wavelength of concern I'm trying to express.
09:28: Murray says this, sometimes even Reformed theology, or I should say imbalanced
09:35: Reformed theology, could deter expressions of appreciation.
09:42: Affirming good works? Don't we believe in total depravity? Praising people will only make them proud.
09:49: Isn't humbling people our aim? I mean, it's supposed to be solely, oh, Gloria, where does people praise enter into that picture?
09:56: Can you relate to that, Chris? Oh, yeah. And I think the importance of saying, all right, it's true, all things to the glory of God, but we have
10:10: Genesis to Revelation, and we need to speak and preach and teach the whole counsel of God, and this book,
10:20: Encouragement, Adrenaline for the Soul, just as Jeff Thomas says, it mines a very important vein in the biblical revelation, and it's just gold material when we think of how the scriptures call us to be encouragers.
10:41: I mean, even upon the Lord Jesus Christ, he's the one who will say to us unworthy servants, well done, good and faithful servant.
10:53: And our ministry, whether it be as a pastor, or as an elder, or as a father, or a mother, or an employer, or a brother, or a neighbor, if we're going to be conformed to the image of Christ, we need to be encouragers.
11:14: Amen. And I believe, though, even the name Barnabas means
11:20: Son of Encouragement, doesn't it? That beautiful name from the scriptures? Oh, yes, exactly.
11:27: And I think, really, the main verse that I use in the book as the basis for the entirety of all the rest of the chapters, it's that passage where the apostle speaks in 1
11:42: Thessalonians chapter 5, and he says in verse 11, Therefore, encourage one another, and build up one another, just as you are doing.
11:54: Frankly, I'm the author of this book, and I'm not writing the book from a perspective that I'm an expert on this.
12:04: No, not at all. To the contrary. I'm writing a book because I'm really encouraging, and exhorting, and imploring myself to be an encourager, because my default setting, the way that my personality is wired, it's not to be an encourager.
12:24: I find that I can have a hawk -eye for other people's defects, and I can have a bat -eye for their virtues.
12:37: And you are a Reformed Baptist, after all. Oh, you know, it's interesting.
12:43: You laugh about that, but is there something truthful in that little humorous statement that you gave?
12:50: Yes. David Murray. David Murray's saying the same thing, that could it be that we as Reformed people, we have great strength, but could it also be that there are some weaknesses that is present in the
13:04: Reformed community? Sadly, without a doubt, that is true.
13:09: That's why I made the joke. In fact, before we go into the main themes of your book,
13:16: I'd like you to do some damage control here, lest people misunderstand what you're talking about.
13:24: There seems to be two extremes in regard to this whole subject.
13:30: On the one hand, you have the stereotypical Reformed Christian who may be more prone, as you just said, to pick out the splinters from his brother's eyes before he even moves the beams from his own.
13:57: And on the other extreme, you have the whole self -esteem movement, the whole movement that seems to, if it wouldn't say it directly in the words that I'm about to say, a denial of total depravity, but even if it doesn't say that, or they that are proponents of the self -esteem movement, even if they don't say that, they are practically bordering on a pelagious understanding of being born innocent, being born without a sin nature.
14:40: And basically, the king of this, at least in the 20th century, was
14:46: Robert Shuler, and of course, before him, Norman Vincent Peale. But this whole idea of building up the self -esteem of those around you being basically the most important thing it seems you could do.
15:04: In fact, Robert Shuler had even written that the biggest mistake that Christians make is to point out the sin in others, which is obviously not only ridiculous, but seriously heretical.
15:16: But we have to avoid both of those extremes, don't we? Oh, absolutely we do.
15:22: And I think of the proverb that says, profuse are the kisses of an enemy.
15:30: And I think it's true. We should be able to, like the prodigal father,
15:37: Luke 15, running to his son, hanging on his neck, giving him kisses. We should be able to do that.
15:43: And even to say, like the heavenly father says to the Lord Jesus, to his son, this is my beloved son with whom
15:51: I am well pleased. But, profuse are the kisses of an enemy, the proverb says, but faithful are the blows of a friend.
16:00: And if we're going to be a real friend, a real father, a real pastor, a real brother, a real neighbor, we're going to be willing to deliver the blows of a friend.
16:14: In fact, listen to this little vignette that is actually in the book.
16:20: Listen to what it says here. Paul Washer, you know who Paul Washer is? Oh yes,
16:26: I've had the privilege of interviewing him, and he wrote a wonderful, glowing commendation for this program.
16:32: Yes, yes, and listen to this here. Paul Washer is anything but an ego -stroking, motivational speaker.
16:40: That's certainly true. He's a straight -talking preacher of God's word, but in a recorded 2017 sermon, he tells of having recently listened to a famous and notoriously misguided motivational speaker.
16:54: Now listen to this, Chris. He says, this is Washer himself saying this, I was very convicted listening to this speaker.
17:02: Just let that sink in for a moment. It was audible laughter, because the speaker was Joel Osteen. But listen to what
17:10: Washer goes on to say, he says, I do believe that the things he was saying were out of context and wrong.
17:17: Where I was greatly rebuked was this, he was greatly encouraging all with all his heart.
17:26: But I asked myself, this is Washer now, how encouraging am I? And I thought about how it is that such a blessing comes to me when someone comes up to me and encourages me and says, man, you're doing well.
17:40: Man, that was great. Man, you're progressing. How it just jump -starts me, and I found out that just jump -starts everyone else.
17:52: This is Washer now saying this, I just don't think by and large as God's people, at least for myself,
17:58: Paul Washer was saying, I don't do that enough. Wow, brother, sister, that was amazing.
18:05: I'm so proud of God's grace in you. Keep going, press on, go on. That's Washer saying,
18:11: I need to add this dimension of encouragement to my ministry if I'm really going to echo the biblical whole counsel of God.
18:20: Praise God. And isn't there a danger, not only of what I mentioned earlier, the whole self -esteem movement and so on, but in the common speech of Christians, when we are having private conversations especially with folks, the sin of flattery, a lot of people misuse that term.
18:47: You know, you give them a compliment and they'll say, oh, thank you for such wonderful flattery. Well, flattery isn't a good thing.
18:53: Flattery is when you exaggerate the truth or actually downright lie about something in a positive way in order to get some kind of gain out of telling that person something that builds up their confidence and self -esteem and so on.
19:12: But the sin of really laying it on thick with people, heaping compliments on them that you really don't believe, things that aren't even accurate about this person's life, skills, talents, abilities, and their character, isn't that just downright wrong and sinful?
19:33: You mean to flatter someone? Oh, yes, absolutely. I think that the proverb speaks about he who flatters lays a net for the feet of his subject trying to trip him up.
19:47: And I think there is a legitimate concern that we not be flatterers. But you know what?
19:55: Anything that is good can be misused. I mean, take spanking.
20:02: We find that spanking could degenerate into abuse, couldn't it? So do we throw out spanking?
20:10: No. Just because something is abusable doesn't mean it's disposable. Likewise, when we think of encouragement.
20:17: Encouragement could degenerate into flattery, but do we dispose of encouragement because it could become abusive?
20:26: No. Simply because something is abusable doesn't mean it's disposable.
20:32: Now, you have an excellent title in your book for your first chapter,
20:40: The Exhilaration of Encouragement. I can wholeheartedly echo the fact that encouragement is quite exhilarating.
20:51: I was just over two days last week,
20:58: I was in Texas. I was in Denton, Texas at Denton Bible Church.
21:04: And I was manning an exhibitor's booth for Iron Trump and Zion Radio at the Wokeness and the
21:10: Gospel conference. I wish I would have been there. I'm sorry? I wish
21:16: I would have been there at Donald Rich. Oh, that was a phenomenal conference. Absolutely extraordinary. And I can't tell you what a blessing it was to me, sitting there at my booth and having so many people.
21:32: I would guess to say that there were over a hundred that approached my booth.
21:39: Keep in mind, there were 1 ,600 or more people there, but at least a hundred people approached my booth.
21:45: Many of them heaping compliments on me that I believe were heartfelt.
21:52: I don't think that somebody would approach a stranger like me that they have never met in person before and go out of their way to heap their compliments on me if they didn't mean them.
22:02: And they were telling me how much Iron Trump and Zion Radio meant to them, meant to their faith, their walk with Christ.
22:11: And it was just so exhilarating. It was humbling. At one point, I really got choked up, but it was also exhilarating.
22:18: It was invigorating. And it gave me a new drive to continue hosting this program.
22:26: And I knew that most of these folks actually did listen to the show because most of them said something that only a listener would know.
22:36: I have been making public prayer requests for my brother, my oldest brother, who lives 20 minutes from Denton, Texas.
22:45: He has cancer. He has critical stage emphysema and an inoperable aneurysm.
22:52: And he does not know the Lord. And he is 76 years old.
22:58: And that concerns me a great deal, obviously. And one after another, people are coming up to me saying, how's your brother doing?
23:06: Which made me know they listen to the show. Yes. And Chris, it was like adrenaline.
23:13: You were down to the count. It was like smelling salts. You wondered if what you were doing in the radio program had any use at all.
23:23: And it really brightened your eyes. In fact, I open up the book with the account of a guy named Jerry Kramer, who was a football player back in the days of Vince Lombardi.
23:35: And Jerry Kramer was an offensive lineman. And he was at the first practice at the beginning of the season.
23:43: And he was doing everything wrong, Chris. He was going off sides. He was missing his blocks.
23:48: He was slowing his assignments. And the coaches were yelling at him. And Jerry Kramer basically crawled back to the locker room after the practice.
23:58: In fact, Lombardi had actually scolded him and saying, if the attention span of a two -year -old is 20 seconds, and the attention span of a five -year -old is one minute, he says, what does that say about you,
24:14: Kramer? And Kramer was just humiliated. Went back to the locker room, was sitting in front of his locker with his face in his hands, wondering if he should quit football right there or wait till the end of the season.
24:27: And in walks Vince Lombardi. And Lombardi saw the locker room, saw the sense of despair, sized it all up.
24:35: And he walked over to Kramer. And he took his hand. And he messed up Kramer's sweaty hair.
24:43: He pointed his finger at him. He says, Kramer, one day, you're going to be one of the greatest linemen in football history.
24:51: And Lombardi walked out. And that was it. Wow. And Kramer, I heard Kramer testifying just a few years ago on a radio program.
25:00: Kramer said, at that point, Lombardi breathed life into my football dead soul.
25:08: And he said, from that point on, he says, I became a changed man.
25:14: He changed from being a down -for -the -count weakling to a hulk.
25:23: And Kramer went on, if you know the history, he went on to be a starter for Green Bay.
25:30: He anchored their offensive line. He led them to multiple football championships.
25:36: He threw the block against Jethro Pugh, the six -foot -seven -inch
25:41: Dallas Cowboy that opened up a hole so Bart Starr could get in to win the championship.
25:47: And Kramer says, at this point, he said, what made the difference in my life was an encouraging word at a timely moment from Vince Lombardi.
25:58: What I'm saying is, spiritually speaking, we have brothers and sisters who are sitting in front of their locker of life, ready to quit.
26:09: And we can give timely words that can change them from being weakling to hulk.
26:16: We have that power. The Word of God says, in the tongue is the power of life or death.
26:22: It's a powerful thing, this tongue. We ought to use it well. And now we've got to go.
26:28: Our first break, if anybody wants to ask a question of Pastor Mark Chansky, you can send it right in to ChrisArnzen at gmail .com,
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26:54: Don't go away. We'll be right back with Mark Chansky, right after these messages from our sponsors.
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37:22: We are back now with Pastor Mark Chansky of Harbor Reform Baptist Church of Holland, Michigan, and the
37:29: Reform Baptist Network, to discuss his book, Encouragement Adrenaline for the Soul. And we are so thrilled to have him back.
37:37: He is one of my favorite guests to have on this program. I don't know if you've completed what you want to say at this time about the exhilaration of encouragement, but if you could summarize anything else.
37:51: Yeah, yeah, Chris, I think of exhilaration for encouragement. I don't know. I used to be a sprinter back in the day, and I would get in the blocks, and I would be waiting for that gun to go off for me to run the 100 or the 200.
38:07: And I tell you what, that adrenaline surge that rips through the body, it just makes you to be energized and enables you to accomplish great things.
38:22: And that's why I use that analogy of encouragement, like a shot of adrenaline in the soul.
38:28: When a guy, there was a guy in our church who had eaten some nuts, and he was in anaphylactic shock, and he was not able to breathe, but they gave him an
38:40: EpiPen, which is epinephrine, which is adrenaline. It brought him back to life.
38:46: It gave him that strength and surge of energy. Yeah, that's what encouragement does. In fact, you even quoted
38:52: Charles Spurgeon in the advertisement just prior to my coming back. Now, Spurgeon is not a motivational speaker.
39:01: He's a biblical teacher. But listen to this quote from Spurgeon. He says this, It does people good to be told how highly we value them.
39:12: There is many a Christian man and woman who would do better if now and then someone would speak a kindly word to them and let them know that they had done well.
39:26: And I think there are people in my congregation, there are people in my neighborhood who are basically in an anaphylactic shock state.
39:37: And like that proverb says, in the power of the tongue is life and death.
39:44: And for me to be able to bring a word of encouragement, I can just say myself how there was a time when
39:51: I was kind of like a boxer who was down for the count on the canvas.
39:58: And a lady from my church called me up on a Monday morning and just very brief conversation.
40:04: She just said, Hey, Pastor, I want you to know that Mrs. So -and -so just called me and told me that her husband heard your sermon last night.
40:15: And that husband went into his room and spent about a half an hour alone. And he came out and he said,
40:22: Honey, to his wife, that sermon has just made a difference in my life. And God has done a good work in my life.
40:29: And just that woman's calling me and telling me that. Man, it was like smelling salts to me,
40:35: Chris. It enabled me to get off the mat and to fight a good fight again.
40:41: And I even think of how it says in Proverbs 3, 27, it says, Do not withhold good from those to whom it is due, when it is in your power of your hand to do so.
40:55: Even James 4, 17 says, To him who knows the good thing to do and doesn't do it, to him it is sin.
41:02: And there are people in our lives who, if we would just speak a kind word of encouragement, a well done, good and faithful servant, it can be life -changing.
41:16: Again, like an EpiPen to somebody who's unable to breathe barely.
41:23: Well, you go on to say that this is not only a wonderful thing to do, a good thing to do, a blessing to others to do, this act of encouragement.
41:37: It's also, according to your book, an obligation. Tell us about that. Well, yeah, an obligation in the sense of, you know, there are sins of commission, which would be to speak a harsh word.
41:52: You know, like it says in the Proverbs, there's one who speaks like the thrust of the sword. We can sin against people with acts of commission by harming them with cruel words.
42:04: You know, we say sticks and stones can break my bones, but words will never hurt me. Yeah, words can hurt. But also there's sins of omission, like I quoted from James, where it says to him who knows the good thing to do and doesn't do it, to him it is sin.
42:19: So when I see someone who is discouraged, an act of omission is,
42:25: I don't give that encouraging word. I am sin. Matthew 11, 28, people are weary and heavy laden.
42:34: And for me to be able to give an encouraging word to them, obviously the ultimate encouragement is the gospel.
42:41: But along the way, we see how it is important that we be givers of encouragement.
42:48: I even think of, let's take, oh, 1 Corinthians, well, let's say
42:54: Romans 16. It's interesting how there's this beautiful finale to the book, and he's giving a greeting,
43:05: Paul is, to people in the Church of Rome. Just listen to this. And he's not flattering these people.
43:12: He's sincerely encouraging them by giving a good word to them, brightening their eyes.
43:19: He says, I commend to you our sister Phoebe, who is a servant of the Church of Cancria, that you may receive her in the
43:27: Lord in a manner worthy of the saints. For indeed, she has been a helper of many and of myself also.
43:35: So you imagine Phoebe sitting in the congregation there, and she hears her name mentioned publicly, and that she is a servant of great use in the kingdom.
43:46: Or listen to this, it says this, a couple of verses later. Great Priscilla and Aquila, my fellow workers in Christ Jesus, who, listen to this now,
43:55: Chris, who risked their own necks for my life, to whom
44:00: I not only give thanks, but also all the churches of the Gentiles give thanks.
44:05: Now, we realize that Priscilla and Aquila could have had heads puffed up by this, but Paul wasn't concerned about that.
44:13: He was commending them. He was giving those words of encouragement, or even how great
44:19: Rufus, a choice man in the Lord. And so all over the
44:26: Apostle Paul's correspondence, we see encouragement, but I think, like you mentioned earlier on, in Acts chapter nine, it was
44:35: Barnabas, son of encouragement. Barnabas is the one who, when
44:41: Paul came back from Damascus, having had a nightmare first mission experience up in Damascus, where they had to let him out of the city in a laundry basket because there was a conspiracy to martyr him.
44:56: Paul comes back, and he's like a deer in the headlights. And even the Jerusalem church wouldn't receive him.
45:04: Barnabas, Barnabas comes alongside and tells the church the heroic things
45:10: Paul had done in Damascus. And they warmly received him. That was that Epiphan to a man who was spiritually down for the count.
45:19: I think Paul learned lessons from Barnabas that affected the rest of his ministry for decades to come. He was an encourager.
45:27: Now, I have heard by some who are, you know, teachers in different fields that might be a music teacher or a teacher of nearly anything, or a coach that to compliment someone, especially too often, can actually stunt their growth.
45:52: I just saw recently an interview with a teacher Japanese baseball player
45:57: Shohei Otani. He has earned the nickname Showtime.
46:04: And this guy's quite a marvel. He has 102 mile per hour fastball.
46:11: And he said that his coach never complimented him except for one time after a
46:19: World Series win. And after the game, he just said simply good pitching today or something like that.
46:29: And the coach affirmed that. In fact, the coach himself said that he always knew he could be better than what he was.
46:38: Whatever stage of his growth in his skill was that he knew he could be even better.
46:46: So he did not want to compliment him because he thought that that would make him lazy, etc.
46:51: How much truth is there in that? And how much of that is misplaced and false?
47:01: Well, I think there's something to that, Chris. You know, the proverb says this. Eat honey, my son, but eat only what you need lest you have it in excess and vomit it.
47:14: Honey is a good thing. I mean, look at the life of Jonathan. There he was out fighting the battle in the heat of the day.
47:23: And he was fainting when he found honey. And he took his spear handle and he stuck it in the honey.
47:30: And what does it say? It says it brightened his eyes. So honey is really good when it's tactfully and strategically taken.
47:38: It brightens the eyes. Now, that good thing can be overdone, right?
47:43: You can OD on honey and it can be harmful to you. Eat honey, my son, but eat only what you need lest you have it in excess and vomit it.
47:52: And that's right. If we are only exclusively encouraging and never are directly confronting and exhorting, then we're not getting a good healthy diet.
48:04: I can really relate to this myself. I think of, I'm a father and I have four sons.
48:11: And it was my great desire that my sons would be like the good servant who was faithful.
48:20: He didn't bury his talents like the guy who had one talent, but like the guy who had two and the guy who had five talents, they went off and invested them.
48:29: And I would try to drive and spur my sons on. But let's say that one of my sons came home with a report card that had three
48:41: Bs and three Cs. And I thought that they could get all As.
48:47: And I talked to him and I reprimand him. And he comes back the next time and he's got three
48:53: Bs and three As. Now, he's really improved, hasn't he? But I think he should have six
48:59: As. If I say nothing, I think I'm unwise because I think, well, he'll just stall out and stagnate, right?
49:07: He'll be settling, settling for the mediocre. But there's an interesting story that I read long ago.
49:15: It was about a gentleman who went out to his front yard.
49:22: Remember what a newspaper was, Chris? I delivered them from the age of 12 to 17.
49:30: So did I. I basically did the same. Well, the newspaper had been tossed out onto his driveway and there was a little dog who came and brought the newspaper to his front porch.
49:42: And he thought, oh, look, the little dog is helping me. I'll pat him on the head.
49:47: So he gave him a little treat. And the dog went over the next morning, he came back and there were six newspapers on his front stoop.
49:58: And the point was, the dog didn't stagnate. The dog was urged on to do more.
50:04: And likewise, I think I'm wise. If my son makes a distinct uptick in his GPA for me to commend him.
50:12: And I've even watched two of my children ran cross country. And if you're a cross country coach and one runner is running a 19 minute, five kilometer and you're convinced he can run a 17.
50:28: So he runs from 19 down to 18. If you're stone quiet, you're no
50:33: Lombardi to him. You're a Lombardi. The child, the runner that he is, well done.
50:41: You really helped the team by going from 18 down from 19 down to 18. That's the best way to get into 17, by giving commendation in a godly way.
50:53: And I think that's what the Apostle Paul does when he brings commendation.
50:58: He's talking to the Corinthians. And all throughout the letter to the
51:04: Corinthians, Paul says that he boasts of the Corinthians to the other churches in Asia Minor and Macedonia.
51:13: Why would you boast of those Corinthians who were obviously a church that was a piece of work that still had problems?
51:20: But he told the Corinthians, I boast of you, because he knew that that would be adrenaline driving them to further heights of maturity.
51:30: So you're basically saying that the coach of the Nipponham Fighters, where Shohei Otani had his start in baseball, he's with the
51:39: Los Angeles Angels now, but his Japanese coach was wrong for his method, even though it appeared from the outside to work.
51:50: It may be that Shohei achieved such great heights in his skill in spite of the way his coach behaved.
51:59: Well, I'm just saying that I want my ministry, I want my fatherhood, I want my personality to not image a
52:10: Japanese baseball coach. I want to image the Lord Jesus.
52:15: Look at the Lord Jesus. There he is in the upper room, okay? Here's the Lord Jesus up in the upper room. And his disciples, they've just heard that the
52:23: Lord Jesus says that he is going to, on the morrow, be handed over, and he is going to die, and three days he'll rise again, and he's going to lug them to the end, referring to his crucifixion that's upcoming.
52:39: And they're all staring at each other, not fully aware of what Jesus is going to do, but John 13 is going to lug them to the end, and he washes their feet.
52:48: And what do they do after that? They begin to argue, the text says, about which one of them is the greatest.
52:56: You talk about people who deserve the tongue -lashing, but it's amazing how the
53:02: Lord Jesus Christ responds to them in the upper room, realizing that they have a marathon race that they have to run in the next 24, 48, 72 hours.
53:14: And the Lord Jesus says to them, you are those who have stood by me.
53:20: He commends them for the way they have stood alongside him in the three years of ministry, because he knew they needed the adrenaline and that encouragement to get them through the obstacle course of temptation they would need to run in the next 72 hours before he rose from the dead.
53:38: Well, we have to go to our midway break right now, and please be patient with us, it's a bit longer than the other breaks in the show, because Grace Life Radio, 90 .1
53:47: FM in Lake City, Florida, requires of us a longer break in the middle of the show, because they are required of the
53:53: FCC to air their own public service announcements and other local things to geographically localize
54:01: Iron Sherpa and Zion Radio to Lake City, Florida, and while they do that, we air our globally heard commercials.
54:06: So please use this time wisely, write down as much of the information as you can for as many of our advertisers as you can, so that our advertisers will remain pleased that they are getting responses from our listeners, whether you are patronizing them by buying their products, using their services, visiting their churches, financially supporting their parachurch organizations, or if you can't do any of those, please just respond at the very least to thank them for sponsoring this program and keeping it on the air.
54:36: That will go a long way, but also write down questions for Mark Chansky on encouragement and send them to ChrisArnzen at gmail .com.
54:44: ChrisArnzen at gmail .com. Don't go away, we'll be right back after these messages from our sponsors.
54:58: Hello dear ones, my name is Justin Peters and my friend Chris Arnzen, host of Iron Sharpens Iron Radio, and I are frequently blessed to share great times of fellowship with one another at conferences all over the
55:10: United States. We'll both be enjoying more fellowship together at the G3 conference in Atlanta, Georgia, Thursday, September 30th through Saturday, October 2nd, on the theme,
55:23: Christ is supreme over all. I'll be speaking there along with over 20 other speakers, including
55:29: John MacArthur, Phil Johnson, Voddie Balcom, Joel Beakey, and James White.
55:35: For details, visit g3conference .com. That's g3conference .com.
55:44: Please join Chris Arnzen and me September 30th through October 2nd at G3 2021.
55:51: This is Justin Peters reminding you that Christ is supreme over all. The Iron Sharpens Iron Radio advertising family.
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58:15: In Psalm 139 verse 14, the psalmist offers praise to the Lord like this,
58:21: I praise you because I'm fearfully and wonderfully made and wondrous are your works that my soul knows very well.
58:28: He saw God's goodness and mercy kindness and the beauty in what
58:33: God has designed and he has erupted into praise. In any crisis or problem brothers and sisters our only fallback position is to trust
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01:02:22: We're a diverse family of all ages, enthusiastically serving our Lord Jesus Christ in fellowship, play, and together.
01:02:28: Hi, I'm Pastor Bob Walderman, and I invite you to come and join us here at Lindbrook Baptist Church and see all that a church can be.
01:02:34: Call Lindbrook Baptist at 516 -599 -9402, that's 516 -599 -9402, or visit lindbrookbaptist .org,
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01:04:38: Thanks for helping to keep Iron Sharpens Iron Radio on the air. I'm Dr.
01:04:52: Tony Costa, Professor of Apologetics and Islam at Toronto Baptist Seminary. I'm thrilled to introduce to you a church where I've been invited to speak and have grown to love,
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01:05:10: It's such a joy to witness and experience fellowship with people of God like the dear saints at Hope Reform Baptist Church in Coram who have an intensely passionate desire to continue digging deeper and deeper into the unfathomable riches of Christ in his holy word and to enthusiastically proclaim
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01:07:09: Please visit us at truthloveparent .com. When Iron Sharpens Iron Radio first launched in 2005, the publishers of the
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01:09:07: Welcome back, this is Chris Arnzen and if you just tuned us in, our guest for the entire program today is
01:09:15: Mark Chansky, Pastor of Harbor Reform Baptist Church of Holland, Michigan. We are discussing his new book,
01:09:21: Encouragement Adrenaline for the Soul. Before we return to that discussion, I have a couple of announcements
01:09:27: I need to make. First of all, I hope you tune in tomorrow, Wednesday the 23rd of June to hear our interview with Reformed Anglican Roger Salter, always a remarkable guest.
01:09:41: I love interviewing Roger, a dear friend and a man with the true heart of a shepherd.
01:09:48: And then on the 24th Thursday, we have Dr. Joe Moorcraft returning to our program.
01:09:55: Dr. Moorcraft is Pastor of Heritage Presbyterian Church in Cumming, Georgia.
01:10:01: He's an author and also has written a commentary on the Westminster Larger Catechism, and we will be interviewing him again.
01:10:11: Then on Friday, we have David Engelsma who is the author of a new commentary, a two -volume commentary on the
01:10:22: Belgian Confession, and we are going to be having our third interview on that great confession on Friday the 25th.
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01:13:35: We have a listener with a question for you, Pastor Mark Grady in Asheboro, North Carolina, a very faithful listener to Iron Trump and Zion Radio and very generous supporter of this program.
01:13:48: Greetings, brothers. All through the New Testament, we see where we're told to encourage others, but also in the
01:13:58: Old Testament, we see Jethro encouraging Moses, Jonathan encouraging David.
01:14:03: And other examples, I personally believe in this day and age, we definitely need to be encouraging others.
01:14:09: Do you agree that we need to do that more than ever? I have a feeling the answer is yes.
01:14:17: Pastor Mark. Yeah, I think just in reading through our Bibles, we find ourselves falling short of this high standard of our being encouragers.
01:14:28: Again, like I said, I think of the last day when Matthew 25, the Lord Jesus is going to say to unworthy servants like us, well done, good and faithful servant.
01:14:39: I think we need to be people who image the character of our Heavenly Father and our glorious Savior.
01:14:46: And even the Holy Spirit is the encourager, isn't he? So for us to be that to one another, like the whole
01:14:54: Trinity. When I speak of encouragement, just to just very practically express what
01:15:00: I mean by that. I mean, to be able to give, well, firstly, it would be the giving of the gospel.
01:15:08: In fact, let me make sure that we save about at least four or five minutes for the end, so I can give the ultimate encouragement, which is the gospel.
01:15:17: But there are other subsidiary important encouragements that in we need to give. I talked about commendation, like Paul commends
01:15:27: Phoebe, who is a servant in the Church of Cancria, or I mentioned that boasting, like Paul boasts in the
01:15:36: Corinthians, as he says, great is my boldness and speech and boasting about you.
01:15:42: He says, yeah, even to the broken Church of Corinth, or even the idea of giving a report about someone.
01:15:51: I think of that passage in Philippians 2, where Paul is speaking of Epaphroditus.
01:15:59: He speaks of, he is your fellow soldier. It says that you were distressed because you heard that Epaphroditus was sick.
01:16:09: Indeed, he was sick. He almost died, Paul says. He says this about Epaphroditus, who had been sent to Rome to seek out and help
01:16:18: Paul on the basis of the church in Philippi sending him out. He says this, hold such men like Epaphroditus in high esteem because of the work of Christ.
01:16:31: He came close to death, not regarding his life. Supply what is lacking in your service toward me.
01:16:37: And that's an example to us, how we need to be people who aren't silent about the kingdom accomplishments of others.
01:16:49: If I'm on a Sunday morning, like I did a few weeks ago, I came to the church, and it was obvious that on Saturday, a number of people had been busy manicuring the lawn, planting new flowers, putting down wood chips.
01:17:07: It was a magnificent masterpiece out in our front yard, Chris. So for me to stand up and say,
01:17:14: Eric, and Rachel, and Nancy, who labored, let's thank
01:17:20: God for what they've done. Brothers and sisters, thank you for your, taking your whole Saturday and crimping this building for the sake of Christ and his kingdom.
01:17:31: If we don't do that, we're not echoing the biblical call to being encouragers, or even something like using people's names, remembering them.
01:17:44: Have you ever known of people, Chris, who they know who you are, but they never seem to remember your name?
01:17:51: I have that. I know they can't remember my name. And in fact, I'm guilty of not remembering people's names constantly.
01:18:00: It's truly a labor of love when we remember someone's name, and we speak someone's name.
01:18:06: There's just something about it when people speak our name. Even think of, well, look at the Old Testament, and how you consider
01:18:13: David's mighty men in 2 Samuel 23. All 37 of David's men, those names are all written down in the roster of the mighty men.
01:18:27: This wasn't a waste of Old Testament ink. Just like when it speaks about the building of the wall in the days of Nehemiah, in the third chapter there, there are 80 names given for the persons who were working on the wall, shoulder to shoulder to shoulder, the captains at every area.
01:18:47: The names are given. The reason those names are given was because we realize that the healthy prospects of name recognition inspired work performance and noble fighting among David's mighty men, among Nehemiah's workers.
01:19:09: So we should be speaking names. I mean, look at the Lord Jesus in His ministry. He looks up into a tree, and what does
01:19:16: He say to that guy up in the tree? Zacchaeus, come down. He knows my name?
01:19:23: Or even think of how on resurrection morning in John 20,
01:19:31: Mary was crying, and Jesus says to her, thinking the man was the gardener,
01:19:36: Jesus says, Mary. Or even think of Peter in Mark 16.
01:19:43: The angel says, go tell the disciples and Peter to go meet me in Galilee.
01:19:50: Imagine Peter, who had three times denied the Lord Jesus, and he hears the report that Jesus has risen from the dead, and he says to the women, say it again, say it again.
01:20:03: Did he actually speak my name, Peter? You see, the speaking of our name was characteristic of the
01:20:10: Lord Jesus and His ministry, and I think in our ministry too. When we remember the names of people, like a visitor who came once, and he comes back again, and you remember his name, that can be life -changing for relationship and for an individual.
01:20:26: Even Tim Keller tells this really interesting account of how he had visited and met
01:20:33: Professor Clowney from Westminster, and two years later he saw
01:20:39: Clowney again, and Keller, who was kind of insecure at this time, and he wasn't into ministry at all, but he said,
01:20:47: Professor Clowney, you won't know my name, but I met you two years ago, and Clowney said to him,
01:20:53: I know your name, you're Tim Keller, and Keller said, he spoke my name, he remembered my name, he actually remembered my name.
01:21:03: Again, like smelling salts to him, and I think we should be willing to encourage people by remembering their name, or how about even by cheering someone on.
01:21:15: You think of Nehemiah there on the wall as they're building, he says to his fellow builders, don't be afraid of Tobai and Sanballat, remember the
01:21:24: Lord, great and awesome, fight for your brethren, your sons, your daughters, your wives, and your house is just cheering people on.
01:21:31: I know of men who may be men of not a five -talent man, maybe a two -talent man, but a cheering on wife, who is a cheerleader, a helpmate, giving adrenaline to him, this causes the man to be a four -talent man, far beyond what others might expect he could accomplish, because he has a commending and encouraging, a cheering on wife.
01:22:00: Amen, and going back to the remembering of names, the most vivid picture of that that I can remember, right now anyway, in my own life, was when
01:22:12: I was standing in the funeral parlor at age 30, after the death of my precious mother, and I was standing there, and in walks a nun, who was a teacher of mine before I was saved,
01:22:27: I was a Roman Catholic, I went to elementary school in the
01:22:32: Catholic parochial system for eight years, and I hadn't seen this teacher for 16 years, this elderly nun walks into the funeral parlor,
01:22:46: Sister Cora Marie, and she sees me, and the first words out of her mouth were, Christopher, it's so good to see you, and I said to her, you remember who
01:22:56: I am? The last time you saw me, I was a scrawny, skinny, tiny little 14 -year -old boy, and you remember me?
01:23:05: I just can't believe it, and it was very encouraging to me, I don't know where that dear lady is now, she's likely the part of this earth,
01:23:15: I hope that she embraced the gospel, but what a sweet nun she was, but as far as marriage is concerned, another vivid story that comes to mind was when a boss of mine, unbelievably, in front of the entire office, started to parade a young secretary around in front of his wife, who was standing there, and he said to his wife in front of everyone, his wife, by the way, was dropped dead gorgeous, and he said to his wife, you see this figure on this girl, that's what a figure is, and after his wife left,
01:24:06: I said to my boss, I took a great risk of being fired, but I said to my boss, can
01:24:11: I see you in your office for a second? He said, sure, come on in, I went into his office, and I said, are you out of your mind?
01:24:19: I said, God has blessed you with a breathtakingly beautiful wife, and you dare disgrace her in front of your employees, embarrass her, humiliate her in that way?
01:24:32: I said, are you insane? I said, I'll tell you one thing, she's going to start recognizing the compliments of men, of other men, if you don't change your attitude, and start treating her with respect, and giving her the importance.
01:24:45: Oh, yes, yes, exactly, and I even think of the call of husbands in marriage, like you say, we're to love our brides as Christ loved the church, and it says as one loves one own body, for he who loves his wife loves himself, and there's a
01:25:03: Hodge comment on that passage, and he talks about how, you know, every one of us have a body that's not perfect, it's not the best body ever,
01:25:13: I mean, boy, if we had visuals here, you'd see I got this big nose on my face, Chris, and it's my nose, and it's my body, and I take care of it just naturally, and distinctly,
01:25:24: I even pamper my body, in that sense of, I feed my body every day, I give it rest every day, well, likewise, we're called upon to love our wives who are certainly imperfect, just as we are husbands who are imperfect, even think of the song of Solomon, and how the example that is given in Merit to Love, where he says, he's seeking to find things in her that he can commend, not looking for things he can criticize, see, that's my default setting,
01:25:53: Chris, and my wife will tell you that, that I can criticize imperfections, but I think that the type of Christ kind of a husband in Song of Solomon says, behold, 115, it says, you are fair, my love, behold, you are fair, you have dove's eyes, even it's interesting how in the fourth chapter,
01:26:13: Solomon says of his bride, your teeth, your teeth are like a flock of shorn sheep which have come upon from the washing, every one of them, and listen, wait,
01:26:26: Chris, wait, the best part comes now, every one of them which bears their twins, none is barren among them, see,
01:26:35: Solomon is basking in the fact that his beautiful bride still has all her teeth, which was a stunning feature 3 ,000 years ago, the point is,
01:26:45: Solomon is ever scanning her life for things that are worthy of his appreciation, and then he verbally expresses what it is that delights him, and that's the kind of parenting, that's the kind of husbanding that we should engage in, and I learned a lesson,
01:27:04: Chris, you talk about someone dying in a funeral, my dad died exactly 20 years ago, and I still remember when he died, and I was struck with how brief life is, just a vapor,
01:27:16: I remember waking up with a dagger in my heart because my dad was gone, and it was the middle of the night, like 3 a .m.,
01:27:23: I looked over, there was my dear bride who was sleeping there, my bride that I can argue with and criticize, and I just thought to myself, really,
01:27:32: Mark, life is so short, and she could be gone tomorrow, are we gonna spend this brief time with my circling around what
01:27:41: I perceive to be her imperfections, and then confront her about them, or isn't it true that we need to be able to,
01:27:50: Mark, let some things go, let it go, be able to find things, scan her life for things to command, instead of scanning her life for things to criticize, so it's huge that husbands would be encouragers if we're gonna love our wives as Christ loved the church, think of Christ, he is going to look upon his church and speak of her beauty, her dazzling robes, her glorious righteousness, and overlook sin in her life, that's how we're to love our brides as husbands.
01:28:26: In fact, we have to go to our final break right now, it's gonna be much more brief than our other breaks, if you intend to send in a question, we do have a few people already waiting online to have their questions asked and answered, but if you want to join them and get in line, please send in your question immediately, because we are rapidly running out of time, that's chrisarnson at gmail .com,
01:28:48: chrisarnson at gmail .com, please, as always, provide your very first name at least, your city and state of residence, and your country of residence if you live outside the
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01:40:33: This is Chris Arnson. If you just tuned us in, our guest for the entire program has been and will continue to be
01:40:39: Mark Chansky, pastor of Harbor Reform Baptist Church of Holland, Michigan, and coordinator of the
01:40:44: Reform Baptist Network. We are addressing his book, Encouragement Adrenaline for the
01:40:50: Soul. Our email address is chrisarnson at gmail .com, chrisarnson at gmail .com.
01:40:57: And if you're asking a question, please give us your first name at least, your city and state of residence, and your country of residence if you live outside the
01:41:03: USA. Cindy in Findlay, Ohio asks, Pastor Chansky, what is your default compliment when you sincerely want to encourage someone but can't think of anything at the moment?
01:41:16: I'm sure that problem comes up a lot of times when people are talking with me, but anything to say,
01:41:22: Pastor Chansky? Well, I think in the finale of the time together,
01:41:28: I do want to bring the gospel. I think gospel is the ultimate encouragement.
01:41:34: The gospel is also the default encouragement to hell -deserving sinners.
01:41:39: I mean, in reality, we're all bound toward an eternal depression in outer darkness, and the deepest taproots of our discouragement have to do with our needing reconciliation and fellowship with the living
01:41:55: God. So I would say the gospel and the hope of the gospel, I think that's the ultimate default encouragement.
01:42:05: Let me, if I might, Chris, just touch bases. As we talked about husbanding,
01:42:10: I don't want to just focus on one gender. I know you have women, even the young lady from Findlay, Ohio is a lady, so I talked about husbanding and being encouragers.
01:42:24: Let me also talk about just wifing and being encouragers, and I think of how important that is.
01:42:30: You think of how it says in Genesis 2, it's not good that man would be alone, and he gave to the man a helper suitable, which was the woman.
01:42:41: The Hebrew word is etzer, which means a strengthener, and that's really important that women would see themselves to be strengtheners of their husband.
01:42:54: Monica Peace, she says herself, it's interesting how women can encourage other women to be encouragers.
01:43:02: She says this, my husband needs me as his helpmate. He doesn't need my sarcastic put -downs.
01:43:09: He needs my helpful suggestions. So even a godly woman like Martha Peace is saying that she can have a tendency, oh, it speaks of in the
01:43:20: Proverbs even four times about a contentious woman, a continual dripping.
01:43:26: Martha says that's kind of what she struggles with, and just consider how important it is that men, they need a reviving corner in the fight of life.
01:43:37: You've seen boxers, Chris, they get pummeled in the ring, but then at the round end, they can kind of retreat to their corner for reinvigorating, encouragement, refreshment, and you ever hear the exhausted boxer hearing things like, okay, okay, you took some hits, but you also delivered some good ones too.
01:43:58: You're the man. You have what it takes to get out there and take down that Goliath. Well, that's the kind of a strengthening corner that husbands need in the fight of life, giving the encouragement of adrenaline and not the kryptonite of chronic criticism.
01:44:18: And then that's what can sometimes happen in the lives of some men. Laura Schlesinger, kind of a blast from the past, but she wrote an interesting book.
01:44:27: It's called The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands. And it grew out of her receiving all kinds of emails and correspondence from thousands of women.
01:44:39: And she has a chapter in that book, Chris, it's called You're a Nag. And it's interesting because there are women encouraging other women in this book about the proper care and feeding of husbands.
01:44:54: And Schlesinger writes this, she says, the universal complaint of men who emailed my website with their opinions about the proper care and feeding of husbands was that their wives criticize, complain, nag, rarely compliment, or express appreciation, are difficult to satisfy, and basically not as nice to them as they'd be to a stranger ringing the doorbell at 3 a .m.
01:45:24: And then Dr. Laura just goes on to say, ladies, we can't do this to our husbands.
01:45:31: We can't be the kryptonite corner. You know, Superman was taken down by kryptonite.
01:45:37: And it can be a criticizing, like I said, it's a criticizing husband. I was weakening my wife.
01:45:43: But a criticizing wife can be kryptonite to a husband who otherwise could be a really mighty man of God.
01:45:50: So for women to look at their husbands who are not perfect, if they're like me, they can be blockheads, my wife can tell you that.
01:45:59: But to be able to find things that are beneficial, man, it's true that a woman who is an encourager in the life of a man who is a helpmate, you know, it was
01:46:10: Eve who got the song out of Adam. Adam hadn't spoken, scripturally speaking, until we get that Hebrew poetry, which is really song, where he says, this is bone of my bone and flesh of my flesh.
01:46:24: It's the woman who gets a song out of a man. But sadly, I think some men live and die and go to the grave, and they never sang.
01:46:34: A lot of it can be because their wives weren't helpers to them. And I just encourage you wives, you're kingmakers, ladies.
01:46:43: You are kingmakers. And I even know myself, when my wife gives me a well -deserved encouraging word and commendation, it can make me, again, from being a weakling, into being a hulk, when my wife, who knows me best, is willing to commend me.
01:47:02: Praise God. We have an anonymous listener who says, I have recently broke the ice with someone with whom
01:47:13: I have had great conflict, and our relationship was on the brink of utter irreversible disaster.
01:47:21: But I began praying for ways to compliment this person that were true. And I started to address this person, reminding him of the blessings that God had given him in his life, through his gifts and talents in certain areas, and the wonderful and highly praiseable elements of his character.
01:47:45: And this was used by God to begin the mending process. Is this something that you also personally recommend to those that are having conflict with others in their lives, and of course, never through flattery or exaggerated compliments?
01:48:01: Yeah, I agree completely, Chris. I just think of how we're called on in Romans chapter 12, as far as it depends on you, be at peace with all men.
01:48:14: And then it speaks of our blessing, even our enemies. And the idea of our being able to keep burning coals upon someone's head, by words of kindness.
01:48:29: Kindness. There was a Puritan, it was said of him that the best way to make this Puritan your friend was to criticize him.
01:48:38: Because he would come to you, and draw near to you, and love you, and express affection for you.
01:48:44: And I think, yes. Like it says in the Proverbs, the tongue has the power of life and death, and for us to be life -giving in the way that we speak to each other.
01:48:55: In fact, I even think of, for me, the issue of fathering has been huge, because it was when my children got into their later teens, when
01:49:04: I realized that I needed to transition away from being the micromanager when they were young, who dictated to them, and yeah, criticized things that they did.
01:49:16: But now for me to work toward a relationship where I'm letting go of the reins, and I'm beginning to treat them more as an adult to adult, which required more commending.
01:49:26: This is really important, how even Ephesians 6 says, fathers, don't provoke your children to wrath.
01:49:34: Or Colossians 3, fathers, don't exasperate your children that they may lose heart.
01:49:43: If we're constantly criticizing, we can have a real corrosive relationship with our children.
01:49:51: I'm so thankful that the Lord enabled me to see things in a clear way, so that I could have a wholesome relationship.
01:49:59: I can even remember back when I was in my mid -teens, I used to work in a golf pro shop, in kind of an elite country club setting.
01:50:08: And there was an assistant pro there named Don. Don was about 6 '5".
01:50:14: He had this intimidating low voice, and he could hit a golf ball a mile. And Chris, I found working for Don, when he was supervising us pro shop workers,
01:50:24: Don would drive us with like a withering kind of criticism. He'd bark out things like, hey, hey, who strapped
01:50:33: McInerney's clubs on the passenger side of the golf cart? Mac wants to drive?
01:50:39: Or, hey, who forgot to write down Hartman's bucket of range balls? When I would work for Don, I was always under his critical gaze.
01:50:47: I was always just tight and confident and slow moving, and just feared always making a mistake that would cost me some kind of a verbal lashing.
01:50:58: But then in contrast, Chris, there was Tom. He was the caddy master, and Don was out playing golf somewhere.
01:51:07: Tom would be our supervisor. And Tom would say instead things like, hey, how'd you get all those carts, bags, and parks so fast?
01:51:17: I like the way you lined them up along the sidewalk in formation, kind of looks like F -16 fighter planes ready to fly off on a mission.
01:51:26: So when I would work for Tom, I would find under his attaboy, I was loose,
01:51:32: I was confident, I was creative, I was motivated to work by the anticipation of boosting praise for a good job, because I know
01:51:42: Tom wouldn't miss the opportunity. And the question is, what kind of a father am I? Am I a
01:51:48: Don -like father or a Tom -like father? And I needed to make some recalculations when my kids got into teenhood to be someone who was characterized by encouragement, to be able to give them even the drip irrigation of attaboys so they would be fruitful in their latter years as they were soon to leave my house.
01:52:15: We have time for one final question. Another anonymous listener says,
01:52:21: I have recently read Pastors and Their Critics, a Guide to Coping with Criticism in the
01:52:29: Ministry by Dr. Joel Beakey and Nick Thompson. This book reminded me that I should be more frequently complimenting and encouraging my own pastor because I'm sure it must be very discouraging in the ministry to hear criticism over and over again, and I know quite a number of backbiters.
01:52:50: I was wondering what you thought of this book, if you are aware of it, and shouldn't we all be more in tune with the idea that our pastors are typically in urgent need of encouragement?
01:53:04: I highly recommend the book. Joel Beakey has absolute bullseye with that book.
01:53:09: Just think about a lady makes a meal and spreads out the five courses and nobody says anything.
01:53:19: That's a pastor. He presents the ministry of the word. There's something to be commended somewhere on those plates, and I think, yeah, we ought to be doing unto others as we would ask them and have them to do unto us.
01:53:33: Just in conclusion, Chris, what have I got, two or three minutes left? Yes. Okay, let me give the homestretch with the gospel as the ultimate encouragement.
01:53:43: The fact of the matter is that different elements of personal life, of husbanding and wifing and parenting and pastoring and membering, we need to be giving encouragement, but that ultimate encouragement is the gospel.
01:54:02: God so loved the world. He gave his only begotten son. Whoever believes in him shall not perish, but have everlasting life.
01:54:12: That is the ultimate encouragement. The Lord Jesus Christ has given us the ultimate benefit of being blessed by the living
01:54:23: God. The reality is that in our lives, we're always knocking on a door because we want people to love us.
01:54:34: We want people to commend us. We want people to esteem us.
01:54:40: We want people to affirm us. But what happens in the gospel, we have this concept of he who knew no sin became sin for us, so that in him we might become the righteousness of God in Christ Jesus.
01:54:59: We are the righteousness of God. We're dressed in the white linen. And just as the heavenly
01:55:05: Father looked on the son in the Jordan River and said, this is my beloved son with whom
01:55:11: I am well pleased, we're wrapped up in Christ. You ever have a little child come out of the bathtub all soaking wet with his head and you wrap him up in a beefy towel and he's so cute, he's so huggable, you just want to eat him up.
01:55:27: Well, in Christ, wrapped up in the beefy righteousness of Christ, we are delightful and we are so pleasurable in the eyes of the heavenly
01:55:35: Father. And now, Chris, if the only two eyes in the universe that matter, the eyes of God my
01:55:42: Father in heaven affirm me and love me and rejoice in me, now who cares what everybody else thinks?
01:55:49: Their criticism doesn't kill me anymore because the only two eyes in the universe that matter see me as adorable in his sight.
01:55:58: In Christ Jesus. That's the ultimate encouragement, Chris. That's what'll keep you from not just a momentary depression, but from an eternally depression.
01:56:09: We won't be in outer darkness, we'll be in the kingdom with Christ in the Father's house forever.
01:56:16: Praise God. Well, as always, you have been such a joy and a blessing to interview
01:56:22: Pastor Chansky. I do want to let our guests, or should I say our listeners, know that Pastor Chansky will be returning to Iron Sharpens Iron Radio for another interview to discuss the mission of the
01:56:39: Reformed Baptist Network. That's going to be on Tuesday, June 29th, God willing.
01:56:45: I want to, by the way, give all of our listeners the good news, our listeners that sent in questions for that matter, the good news that they have all won a free copy of the book that we are addressing,
01:56:59: Encouragement Adrenaline for the Soul. And please email me your full names and full mailing addresses so that Cumberland Valley Bible Book Service, cvbbs .com,
01:57:12: can ship those books out to you. We want to thank Reformation Heritage Books for providing us with these free copies of Encouragement Adrenaline for the
01:57:21: Soul as our giveaways today. I want to remind you also that the website for the
01:57:29: Harbor Reformed Baptist Church in Holland, Michigan, where my guest is the pastor, the website is harbourchurchholland .org,
01:57:39: harbourchurchholland .org. And the website for the
01:57:44: Reformed Baptist Network is reformedbaptistnetwork .com, reformedbaptistnetwork .com.
01:57:51: Pastor Chansky, if you could just hold on the line for a moment, I'd like to give you a proper goodbye off the air. And I want to thank all of you for listening.
01:57:59: And I want you all to always remember for the rest of your lives that Jesus Christ is a far greater Savior than you are a sinner.