Dont Avoid Confrontation (Things #BigEva Wont Teach You)

All right, this video is going to be a short one, and I just wanted to encourage you, believers, Christians, people that love the

Lord, Jesus Christ, do not avoid confrontations. Do not avoid confrontations.

I think, and just to borrow a big Eva term, you need to lean into confrontation, I think. Now, of course, that's not true of every kind of confrontation.

You know, the Bible is very clear in the book of Proverbs that a prudent man foresees trouble, foresees evil, and hides himself from it.

But it's a foolish man that passes on and doesn't worry about the trouble and is punished for it.

And so we don't want to be a foolish man. We want to be a wise man. So if we see unnecessary trouble, we ought to hide ourselves from it.

We ought not to run headlong into it. But the key word there is unnecessary. Even Paul the

Apostle, he says, as long as it depends on you, be at peace with everybody. The key phrase there is, as long as it depends on you, because it's impossible to be at peace with everybody.

So we don't go looking for trouble for trouble's sake, but there is some trouble. There are some conflicts that, you know,

I think it's in our nature to avoid, but we ought not to. We need to seek that out.

We need to seek those confrontations. Let me tell you what I mean. I had a pastor friend reach out to me the other day, and he was asking for prayer because he was about to initiate a confrontation that he knew was most likely not going to go well.

And he had experience doing this before with this same person. Now, the person that he was going to confront, he has a—I'm not going to name him.

He's a public figure. He has a reputation for being a bit of a hothead and, you know, smart guy, but, you know, there are some issues.

Let's just face that. And he was asking for prayer because he was going to confront him. And he had said that he had confronted him before, and he reacted predictably, like very angry, you know, cursing him out,

I think he said. But even if he wasn't cursing him out, just like making fun of him and, you know, all that kind of thing, he did not react well.

But then a few months later, actually changed. And I'm not going to say it was only because of this confrontation, but as much as mockery that he took and the abuse that he took at the time when he confronted the person, he actually was right.

And a few months later, this guy changed his ways. And I got to be honest with you, this happens all the time.

I was talking to my brother about this. The confrontations that you engage in, you never want to do it.

Like, I'm not a confrontational person, but I'm willing to fight it out. Like, I'm willing to confront somebody.

And so that's the key. Like, I don't think it makes any sense to be like someone who just like loves confronting people and just loves doing it.

And they just get their jollies out of fights and stuff like that. That's a little weird. I mean, I'm sure there's some people that are good, you know, that do that.

But that's not me. I don't like to fight. But I'm willing to fight. You know what I mean? That's the thing.

And this is true even of physical altercations. Like, I don't go out. See, there are some people that they love physical fighting.

You know what I mean? They just love throwing punches and getting hit. It energizes them.

It makes them want to feel alive. I hate it. I fear fights. You know what I mean? I fear fights.

I fear getting hit in the face, and I fear that kind of thing. But not so much so that I'm not willing to do it.

Like, I will fight you if that's what it comes down to. And, you know, some people even know situations where, you know,

I didn't actually throw punches, but it was very clear that I was willing to if it came down to that. So some people have known me in that regard.

But that's the thing. Like, you need to be willing to confront people, and you need to lean into it when it's necessary because sometimes it is necessary.

I've had so many situations in my life where I knew that I had to confront someone about an issue in their life, whether it was a sin issue, whether it was just a stupidity issue, whatever it was, and I knew full well that I was going to get cursed up one side, down the other.

And I knew it wasn't going to go well, and they were going to yell at me. And there are people close to me that can vouch for this, where, you know,

I confronted them. Hold on one second here. Where I confronted them.

See, I've got a regular phone, and I've got a VoIP phone, so they both ring.

It's kind of annoying. Anyway, situations where I confronted them about something, and they were furious at me, and they knew

I was wrong, and I was just being holier than thou, and I was just, you know, wanting to nitpick them, and I was definitely wrong.

They knew it, and they had no problem telling me. And then a few weeks later passed, a few months passed, and they're like, yeah, he was right.

He was right. And sometimes they apologize, and sometimes they don't. Sometimes they apologize and say, you know what?

You were right. I'm sorry for yelling at you. I'm sorry for that. And that's good. That's a good thing. You've got to have some reconciliation there.

That's wonderful. Sometimes they never apologize, but it's still worth it, man. Like, when the Bible says iron sharpens iron, like, if you know anything about the iron sharpening iron process, like how swords are made or how you sharpen a blade or things like that, it's not a peaceful process.

It's a violent process. Sparks fly. It's dangerous. You could get cut, you know, things like that.

Look up a video of someone sharpening a blade. Like, it's not necessarily a safe process, and it doesn't look like a peaceful process, but the end result is obviously worth it.

Otherwise, people wouldn't do it. And so there's a lot of us are like me.

They don't like conflict. They don't want to deal with conflict, but here's the truth.

If you love somebody, you are going to have to get used to it. You're going to have to get over yourself, and that's the reality.

A lot of it is selfishness, that we don't want to trouble ourselves.

We don't want to complicate our own lives. A lot of it is we don't want people to be mad at us. Like, we want to be liked.

We want to be loved. Look, I understand all that stuff. I'm the same way. I want to be liked. I want to be loved.

I don't want to fight. I want to protect my face, you know what I mean? Like, I don't want to get hit.

I'm not a big, tough guy. I'm not. But you can't let that desire rob you of loving people.

You know what I mean? Because if someone's sinning, someone's doing wrong, if someone is believing something incorrectly and is going to go headlong into disaster, and you can see it coming, that's not the kind of evil that you need to hide yourself from.

If you love that person, you need to tell them, knowing full well they are probably going to be very mad at you in the present.

But you have to be willing for someone to be mad at you in the present if you're going to love them. And so often, and obviously it's not every time, but so often they come to their senses later and they're like, you know what, you were right.

But even if they don't, it's still worth it because obviously we're supposed to love the Lord more than anybody, and so that's what's required of us.