Church Promotions

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Mike exposes the utter insanity of how some churches “advertise.” From the “When Col 1:28 is not enough” department. How would you promote your church? Would your focus on the preaching, the nursery, maybe the Incredibles or coffee hour? Listen in to find out what is truly important.  

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Welcome to No Compromise Radio, a ministry coming to you from Bethlehem Bible Church in West Boylston.
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No Compromise Radio is a program dedicated to the ongoing proclamation of Jesus Christ, based on the theme in Galatians 2, verse 5, where the
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Apostle Paul said, But we did not yield in subjection to them for even an hour, so that the truth of the gospel would remain with you.
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In short, if you like smooth, watered -down words to make you simply feel good, this show isn't for you.
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By purpose, we are first biblical, but we can also be controversial. Stay tuned for the next 25 minutes as we're called by the divine trumpet to summon the troops for the honor and glory of her
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King. Here's our host, Pastor Mike Abendroth. Welcome to No Compromise Radio, a ministry.
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My name is Mike Abendroth, and I was going to do a show on Hebrew 7, as I'm here late today.
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I'm going to stay here at the church until 7, and then go teach a home group. But I think you know what
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I'm going to do? We're going to have some fun and games first. So there's a local paper that comes out here in Massachusetts called
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The Landmark, and it has a little section on worship and praise.
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And by the way, if you don't like the radio show, that's okay. You don't have to listen. You can just tell your enemies that they can listen.
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But if you like the show, maybe you...I don't know. I never figured that out.
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Some ministries have this little want list, you know, you go to Amazon and wish list. I could put special canteens and knives and things like that.
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Anyway, this is a worship and praise section, and this is how people advertise their church.
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And I have a discipleship group that I'm meeting with on Sundays during the
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Sunday school hour. We have 10 men in this group. And for this week, I'm having them memorize, along with a bunch of other reading and things, they have to memorize
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Colossians chapter 1, verses 28 and 29. And Paul is writing to them, and he says in NAS is, we proclaim him, talking about the
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Lord Jesus, but on the ESV gets it better. It's him we proclaim, and the
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NAS, I believe it is admonishing every man and teaching every man with all wisdom so that we might present every man complete in Christ.
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For this purpose, also I labor, striving according to his power, which works mightily within me.
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I believe that's the NAS, so I have to memorize him too. And there's Daniel. Hi, Daniel. And I think that's pretty much, you know, what the church has to offer.
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In other words, if we're going to promote our church, and by the way, our bulletins or programs, it says
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Colossians 1, 28 on the front, maybe 29. We're going to talk about Jesus. I mean, if you can get
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TED Talks elsewhere, you can get how -tos elsewhere, but it's incumbent upon every pastor to proclaim the good news.
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We have news, historical good news. Yes, it's theological, but it's historical that there was a real Jesus who was a real representative, who really lived the perfect life, who was really the eternal son of God, who added humanity, two natures.
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How many wheels did Jesus have? That's a good question. That's a different show. Who was raised from the dead and ascended into heaven.
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And we have good news because this God -man, he is the one by whom you have reconciliation with the
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Father. Anyway, we proclaim him. The other day I met the chiropractor. My chiropractor's named
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Dr. Morgan, Mike Morgan, great chiropractor. And I always say to him every time I go there, Morgan, Morgan, because in German, you know, guten
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Morgen, good morning. And sometimes they just say, morning, Morgan, Morgan, Morgan. And I think it's funny.
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He thinks it's dumb. So we all laugh. He laughs at my dumbness and I laugh at myself.
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And so it says here on the sheet, come worship with us. If you would like your church to be a part of this listing, please contact
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Diane. And how would you promote your church? If you could describe, you know, how would you, and then if you're a lay person, how does your church promote itself?
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What do they do? Teaching Christ Jesus, verse by verse, social issues, get togethers,
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Oprah, Ted talks, book reviews, drama, good music.
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Actually, how would you talk to a friend? If you were going to tell them, oh, this is what our church does.
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And they've got a great nursery and they've got a great, the
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Incredibles are going to be here. We had some people leave our church a few years ago. And then I saw on Facebook, somebody showed me, they went to another church for Easter that had the
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Incredibles. I tell people, if Jesus isn't enough, you're not going to like this church.
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If he isn't enough, you'll love this church because we're going to talk about him every single week. I determined to know nothing among you except Jesus Christ, even him, the crucified one.
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Anyway, I won't name the churches because when I was reading these at the chiropractor, they were hilarious.
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And so here's the first one. Come and join a vibrant and welcoming community. Hey, I like vibrant.
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I like communities. My daughter, when she was little and we attended Grace Community Church, we didn't attend, we were members.
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What church do you go to? And little Haley would say, Grace Community. So we have a vibrant and welcoming community where folks, now who writes that?
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Come on. Where folks, where folks of many faith traditions gather to share, learn and grow in faith as we seek to create heaven here on earth.
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Exclamation. Now, actually, this church is a federated church.
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And what federated churches do, it's very simple. In New England, especially, they couldn't afford to keep a
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Baptist church open, a congregational church and a Unitarian church open because they were all in the same common. They were all in the same area.
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And so they just would federate. They just come together. Sunday worship, Sunday school and infant toddler care at 10 with coffee hour following for folk.
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Uh, we offer an active youth and adult program and are affiliated with both the United Church of Christ and Unitarian Universalist Association.
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Open and affirming. So that's what I'm going to write. All welcome here, open and affirming, handicapped, accessible.
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Reverend Robin is the person's name. I guess that could be a guy, couldn't it? Could it not? It could be a, it could be a man's name or a woman's name or a sidekick of a
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Marvel Comics name. Is it Marvel or DC? Is Batman Marvel or DC? I don't know. I know that I don't like any of those shows.
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All right. Here's another one. Um, come exclamation point. Okay. Join us for growth in God's love and grace.
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Okay. I like that. That's good. So far, so good. Sunday, family worship,
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Tuesday, divorce care, Wednesdays, uh, youth group, children's program, team, kid, preschool, grief, share, uh, caregivers, support group.
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Sounds like mother's support groups. And it is anything about the love and grace. Although I like love and grace, don't you?
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And it says here, uh, barrier free. I don't know what a barrier free is.
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Things, you know, that they were those, those objects that the Nazis put in France.
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Uh, so when the men came over across the channel, they couldn't get up onto the beaches.
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You know, that's when I think of barrier. That's what I think of now. Now don't take me. Oh, Wendy just said, DC is Batman. Thank you.
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I saw some old pictures of when I was a kid and I had a birthday party at Peony park in Omaha, Nebraska, kind of like a mini six flags.
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And at the bottom of the picture, it showed the dates and it said 1965.
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And I had a special Batman hat on. So did all my friends. Or as we say in new England, so didn't all my friends.
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I mean, so did they barrier free? What's a barrier free? What are the barriers? Hmm. What are the barriers?
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I don't know. All right. Here's another one. Summer Sunday morning worship services. Okay. Wait a second.
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Summer Sunday morning worship service take place at 10 AM in the church lounge.
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Why does that strike me so funny? Well, at least it's in that of the narthex.
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Remember last time on the show, we were talking about what a narthex means. It's basically a place where there was penance, you know, purging and stripes and, and lashes given.
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So you go into the penitential area at the front and you, you know, before you come into worship, you've got to make sure you, you're tarred and feathered appropriately enough.
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This is the church. I don't know what they serve in the lounge, but it gets people in church growth.
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Summer sessions are lay led. Please see our website for weekly topic. Here we go again. See, this is what
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I don't get. We are barrier free. L G B T Q I.
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What's the I again? I honestly don't know. What's the I? Welcoming congregation with technologies to assist the visually and hearing impaired.
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Okay. I like the technologies, but I don't know what the I is. What's the
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I for? Daniel, Wendy. What's the I for? I don't know. All right. There's another one. And on today on No Compromise Radio, we're looking at worship and praise things.
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And how do you promote your church? If you're going to tell your friend, Oh, you know what? Would you like to come and worship with us? Here's a little bit about our church.
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The pastor is going to get up and he's going to say, you know, we're going to sing a few songs. There's going to be scripture reading. There's going to be an offertory. There's going to be the
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Lord's supper, maybe some baptisms. And then the pastor is going to get up and he is,
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Mike just said, irresistible. Lane, I know it is hard to find a solid church.
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And then our pastor is going to open up the Bible and he's going to show us in context, some verses.
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He's going to explain what they say, S, what they mean, M, how they're applicable, right?
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Because scriptures are trans chronological and they're always relevant. S -M -A. And then we're going to have to figure out, is there anything we need to repent of or from or trust?
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And so that's called smacking the Bible. S -M -A -C. It's a good way to just kind of think about it.
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That's how I teach the kids. What's it say? What's it mean? What's the application? Not, is there application? Because there's a certain way to think, right?
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Even if it's not behavioral, it's how to think properly. And should I change? I mean, I should probably add in some kind of rest or trust or faith or fide or something.
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But anyway, you've got the point. And you say, and then he's going to talk about Jesus and he's going to assure us as Christians that no matter what we do, we can't separate ourselves from the love of God because it's his work.
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And because he loves us so much, that should make us want to live holy lives, especially as he's given us his
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Holy Spirit. What else do we have here? Located at 258 Maine.
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Times are Sunday. That's the vigil at four, Saturday rather, Sunday at 8, 10, 30, 5, and special liturgy for the word for children.
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It's home to the ecumenical food pantry and the St. Vincent's DePaul Society.
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So I, they don't really have an advertiser. They just have located at, and of course that's a
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Roman Catholic church because you don't have to advertise. You just need to go get the Eucharist. You just need to go get the means of grace.
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It doesn't matter really who's doing the homily, who's doing the mass. Is it barrier free?
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I mean, I guess if I'm a Roman Catholic and they had barriers, I would still go to the church because I need the sacraments, right?
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All right, here's one. I ride my bicycle past this one a lot and they've got some usually corny thing and they're trying to get people in for hot dogs.
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And they, in New England, we have something here called bean suppers. You heard me right. B -E -A -N suppers.
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And then that's supposed to get people into the church. And you know, oh yeah, I don't burn. When I walked in the door,
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I'm still alive and had the beans and everything else. Bean supper. Now, of course, in Kentucky and some of those places, they have squirrel boils.
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Those try to attract people to get into the church. When I first heard about squirrel boils,
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I could not believe it. Let's see. How do you get people to come to your church? Well, we have cool rock band.
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We don't have any barriers and we serve squirrel. Well, this place serves a lot of things.
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And let's just read this one here. It's a Methodist church. There's a method to their madness.
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Come join us at, said church, for worship at 10 a .m. for a more informal style of worship.
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Yeah, because you don't want any kind of formal. We will gather to praise God and seek God's love and comfort.
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We are located at Main Street. Handicapped accessible. I'm glad for that last part there. Come to seek
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God's love. Hey, Wendy just said clam chowder supper would get me to come.
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That's so true. Especially the white Boston clam chowder chowder, the chowder heads.
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All right. Here's another one. Emanuel Lutheran Church. Oh, I'm not supposed to say the name. Welcomes everyone.
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Does all mean all? Does everyone mean everyone? At 9 a .m. Sunday for communion service with children's word.
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That's capital W. Capital C. Must be some kind of special thing. Join us for coffee, juice and fellowship immediately following the service.
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Now, see if it was coffee, juice, fellowship and Hamachi sushi sashimi afterwards.
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I would go to that. I try to end service early here and then there'd be free sushi. If you really want to get people in.
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We don't need squirrel boils and bean suppers. And I know how to do this. This interesting here.
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There's a senior group discussion and it's called spirituality for the home stretch.
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So with you, if your home stretches are too secular, this is the place for you.
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There are some websites that you can go to to check this out in with further detail.
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All right. This one here. We are a nurturing church family. I don't know what the opposite would be.
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Why they'd have to say that we don't nurture people here who strives to be kind to all people.
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Okay. That's nice. And have a mission and outreach focus in our ministry. What's the mission outreach? More kindness, more love.
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I'd like to teach the world to sing in perfect harmony. Remember that old Coke commercial that they used?
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Okay. Fellowship coffee after service. Okay. Looking for a caring community, a place of vibrant worship.
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What's that mean? Bass guitar, loud drums, no plexiglass surrounding said drums and cool blue lights.
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You have to have cool blue background or else you can tell I'm old. You can tell I'm almost 60. I don't feel like it, but I look like it.
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A place that loves and welcomes kids. You know, most churches, they're not too welcoming for kids.
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They don't love kids. They're just like, you know what? What do kids do? They take up a room. They don't give much and they have to go to the bathroom.
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Right? That's what kids will get you. Okay. Seniors.
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They also love seniors and all those in between. And then it says a place for you, question mark.
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I'm wondering how the editor's working. Oh, yeah. Mike said we got to have fog machines. You know, some kind of dry ice deal would be good.
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They have hymns, organ, choir, and robes on Sundays for a unique blend of traditional and contemporary, where they add, listen to this, guitars, drums, and video for their worship style.
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They've got for the men, they've got gladiator, patriot, and, uh, uh,
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I don't know. Saving Private Ryan clips about sacrifice, a redemptive hero themes.
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I'm making this part up. And for the ladies, they have, uh, I don't know.
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What kind of shows do ladies like? So I don't, you know, the, the stereotypical thing would be some kind of romance deal, but, but I, I think this is not stereotypical.
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I think this is more, I don't know. They, they like driving Miss Daisy. Josh just said how to grow your church fatty foods.
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Oh man. Baby care and sunny school are available at the same time. What's the next one?
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Congregational church invites you to bring your questions. Okay. So here we go. Lane said, back rubs.
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My wife would like, like that. Um, remember at promise keepers, I'd never have been to a promise keepers, but I've been told you're in the stadium.
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You're doing all the rah -rah stuff singing. Actually the singing, I'm sure it sounded good. I heard some CDs cassettes where it sounded really excellent.
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Something about all those men singing. And then you were supposed to give people in front of you at this men's, you know,
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Anaheim stadium. I think the one that I was thinking about was the Coliseum in Los Angeles. And you're supposed to give the guy in front of you a
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Holy ghost back rub. That would be really bad because if I was there, the guy in front of me, he'd get, he'd get ripped off because I wouldn't want to do it.
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And then the guy behind me, I wouldn't, I'd say number one, don't touch me. I guess he could switch spots with me and then he could go to the front guy and then he could give the back rub.
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But then that means the guy behind the guy behind me, then he would get, and then see, it just, it just, it's house of cards.
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I guess I could just go to the very back top row and then just like, look around like I didn't understand.
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All right. What do we have here? We have a bring your questions, hopes, dreams, fears, and yes, doubts.
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And by the way, that is something that's so big emergent church started it. And so many people are doing it now where somehow doubt is a virtue and, and, and faith is not antithetical to doubting faith.
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This is the opposite. And you can have this doubting faith. Obviously you can have a faith that's a weak faith in the right object, the risen savior, the
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Lord Jesus Christ. But this whole doubting thing and doubt is a virtue. Doubt is not a virtue.
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You're just going to tell you that right now, if you're a doubter, you ask God, please alleviate your doubts so that you can focus on the person and work of Christ Jesus in the scriptures here.
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It says, worship and build community with us every Sunday. Community followed by coffee and greeting of all the new friends.
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Those are all my old friends there. We love kids. I'm thankful for that. Believing they should be seen and heard.
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So bring them along. Hey, if they should be seen and heard, why don't you have them go up to the microphone?
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We're on a year long journey, capital J, into who we think
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Jesus is. Reverend Jane.
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Oh, Tarzan, where are you? Come on. We are on a year long journey into who we think
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Jesus is. Well, I guess that goes hand in hands with doubts and children should be heard and seen.
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Everyone is welcome. And we mean that. I want, you know what? Here's the question. All this welcoming stuff and barrier free. What if I'd like to go?
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What if, I'm sure this is going to get out to them, some of these people here. Am I welcome?
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Am I welcome? Are there barriers for a fundamentalist? You know, they would think I was a fundamentalist.
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A kind of person like, you know, here's the Calvinists here. Wendy said, say no thanks. I get my Holy Ghost back from my wife.
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That is so bad. Oh man. What does
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Jesus mean to you? I know we're not trying to find that out because remember the issue from the reformation standpoint, and of course we can see this in scripture too.
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Since our minds and our wills have been affected by sin and our consciences and everything about us, our bodies have been affected.
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We are wholly depraved. Every component that we have, every aspect of us is depraved.
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Therefore, we need scripture that's fixed and that's outside of us.
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And then if I was dead, scripture would still mean the same thing. If all these people were dead, Jesus would still be the same person because it doesn't matter what they think.
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It doesn't matter what I think. It doesn't matter what you think. How does God reveal himself in scripture? And therefore we're trying to find out from scripture, since we're not living 2000 years ago and we can't just talk to Jesus, what has
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God told us about his son in scripture? And therefore it's outside of us and it's fixed and it's not tainted by any kind of sin.
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Once that's what Jesus means to me, let me guess. Not quite as holy, not quite as a king, not quite the
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Lord we want him to be, but more of a friend, kind of a pillow pet. Did I just say that? Pocket pet?
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Pillow pet? What do they have? I don't know what they have. We are seeking a year -long journey into who we think Jesus is.
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One thing about it, when you come in here preaching here, at least at Bethlehem Bible Church, and I'm far from the standard, but I'm trying to do things accurately.
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I never want anybody to think, I wonder what they believe here. I wonder what the gospel is here.
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I wonder if they believe in sin, death, burial of resurrection, burial of resurrection. I wonder what they believe here.
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I'm not too sure what that pastor's trying to say. He's trying to make some inductive thing, so I catch it.
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And then I walk out two hours later and go, aha, that's what that guy meant. That's not what I'm trying to do at all.
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I'm trying to show you. I regularly say, do you see that in your verse? Do you see Colossians 128? Him we proclaim, present tense.
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Every time you come here, I'm going to tell you about this great Jesus and this savior, this redeemer, this advocate, this friend of sinners, this high priest,
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Hebrews, this son greater than angels, greater than Aaron. And the list goes on. I will tell you because I've studied all week.
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And then I'm going to tell you what the text says and means. Why? Because I'm great?
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No, because I am under the mandate of the great one. I'm an ambassador. I'm a steward and I'm to be found faithful.
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And I'm not here to be not, I'm supposed to be the leader, not the follower and say, well, what do you think
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Jesus means? That is, that is moot. Jesus means the same thing, whether you believe it or not.
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Whether you're alive or dead, we're not trying to find that out. And especially when you use journey, it makes me think of some kind of band, right?
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I saw a journey once they were the headliners. And then the second band was Ronnie Montrose. And then the third band was this new band that was up and coming.
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They were called Ben Halen. Anyway, that's just my story for the time. What else do we have here?
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We have no matter who you are or where you are in life's journey, you're welcome here. Journey, Sunday, family worship,
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Sunday, school, nursery care, coffee hour. They're big on coffee. That's the hipster thing. I guess coffee, uh, communion offered, not coffee.
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The first Sunday of the month, adult and children, choir, youth group. We are an open capital O and affirming capital
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A church. That's what we are. Reverend Janet, the river was deep and we swam it.
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Janet. Well, my name is
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Mike Abendroth. There's no compromise radio. I mean, it just really, I don't care if you're a congregationalist, you know what, if you're a
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Roman Catholic, obviously I disagree with you. We're not in the same denominational kind of framework, but you should just say, this is what we believe.
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This is what we're going to teach. And you just tell people all this disguising with barrier free and open, and we're going to try to read books and we're going to have squirrel, you know, boils and we're going to have, uh,
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Lansing, our boils, and we're going to have special bean suppers and everything else.
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I don't even care if they do that, but just tell me, okay. We believe everybody gets to go to heaven.
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We're a universalist. And so it doesn't matter what you want to do. See you once a year. I mean, let's just be honest. Anyway, my name is
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Mike Abendroth. We're going to come back on Facebook live in about two minutes for some Hebrews because I can't take this anymore.
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No Compromise Radio with Pastor Mike Abendroth is a production of Bethlehem Bible Church in West Boylston.
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Bethlehem Bible Church is a Bible teaching church firmly committed to unleashing the life transforming power of God's word through verse by verse exposition of the sacred text.
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Please come and join us. Our service times are Sunday morning at 1015 and in the evening at six. We're right on route 110 in West Boylston.
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You can check us out online at bbchurch .org or by phone at 508 -835 -3400.