WWUTT 374 Amnon and Tamar?

In 2 Samuel 13, we enter into a very dark saga in David's household. In fact, some of the events that we're gonna read about are of a mature nature. So mom and dad, you may wanna listen to this first before your children, when we understand the text.

You're listening to When We Understand the Text, committed to the sound teaching of the word of God. Find videos and more at our website, www .wutt .com. Now here's our host, Pastor Gabe Hughes.

David Confesses His Sin in Psalm 32

Thank you, Becky. I'm gonna begin in Psalm 32, where David writes the following. Blessed is the one whose transgression is forgiven, whose sin is covered. Blessed is the man against whom the Lord counts no iniquity and in whose spirit there is no deceit.

For when I kept silent, my bones wasted away through my groaning all the day long. For day and night, your hand was heavy upon me. My strength was dried up as by the heat of summer. I acknowledged my sin to you and I did not cover my iniquity.

I said, I will confess my transgressions to the Lord and you forgave the iniquity of my sin. Therefore, let everyone who is godly offer prayer to you at a time when you may be found. Surely in the rush of great waters, they shall not reach him.

You are a hiding place for me. You preserve me from trouble. You surround me with shouts of deliverance. I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go. I will counsel you with my eye upon you.

Be not like a horse or a mule without understanding which must be curved with bit and bridle or it will not stay near you. Many are the sorrows of the wicked, but steadfast love surrounds the one who trusts in the Lord.

Be glad in the Lord and rejoice, O righteous, and shout for joy, all you upright in heart. Last week, as we were in our study of 2 Samuel, we read the story of David and Bathsheba. And then it was Nathan, the prophet, that revealed to David the sin that he had committed before the Lord.

David not only had an affair with Bathsheba, a woman who was married to someone else, but had her husband, Uriah the Hittite, killed in the heat of battle. And so Nathan said to David that the child that was conceived from David and Bathsheba's union was going to die.

And sure enough, that's exactly what happened. Nathan also said that his house was going to begin to fall. And so that's what it is that we're going to be reading about today, the fall of David's home and the godlessness, really, that began among his very own children.

Now, as was stated at the start of this episode, the nature, the content of what it is that we're gonna be reading today is rather adult. It was last week too, and I didn't give warning there, but did wanna issue a warning this week that if this program is something that you do as family devotions in the morning, and I have had some emails from parents who have said that they homeschool and they begin every day with the When We Understand the Text podcast, which is great.

I appreciate that very much. But in case you have young children and you don't want to kind of expose them to some of these things without prepping them on it first, then let me say that this may be something that you'll wanna listen to before you do it as a family devotional.

Amnon's Lust for Tamar and Her Violation

2 Samuel 13 is where we begin with the story of Amnon and Tamar. Now Absalom, David's son, had a beautiful sister whose name was Tamar. And after a time, Amnon, also one of David's sons from one of his other wives, loved her.

So Amnon would have been Tamar's half-brother, but Absalom was her full brother. And Amnon was so tormented that he made himself ill because of his sister Tamar, for she was a virgin, and it seemed impossible to Amnon to do anything to her.

So this wording that he was sick over Tamar is basically saying that he lusted after her. But it's not that he was sick because of the guilt that he felt for lusting after his sister. It's because she was a virgin and he knew that if he did anything with her, it would be found out.

So in verse three, Amnon had a friend whose name was Jonadab, the son of Shimea, David's brother. And Jonadab was a very crafty man. And he said to him, "'O son of the king, why are you so haggard morning after morning?

Will you not tell me?'. And Amnon said to him, "'I love Tamar, my brother Absalom's sister.'. Jonadab said to him, "'Lie down on your bed and pretend to be ill. And when your father comes to see you, say to him, "'Let my sister Tamar come and give me bread to eat and prepare the food in my sight that I may see it and eat it from her hand.'.

So Amnon lay down and pretended to be ill. And when the king came to see him, Amnon said to the king, "'Please let my sister Tamar come and make me a couple of cakes in my sight that I may eat from her hand.'.

Then David sent home to Tamar saying, "'Go to your brother Amnon's house and prepare food for him.'. So Tamar went to her brother Amnon's house, where he was lying down. And she took dough and kneaded it and made cakes in his sight and baked the cakes.

And she took the pan and emptied it out before him, but he refused to eat. And Amnon said, "'Send out everyone from me.'. So everyone went out from him. Then Amnon said to Tamar, "'Bring the food into the chamber that I may eat it from your hand.'.

And Tamar took the cakes, the cakes that she had made and brought them into the chamber to Amnon her brother. But when she brought them near him to eat, he took hold of her and said to her, "'Come, lie with me, my sister.'.

And she answered him, "'No, my brother, do not violate me, for such a thing is not done in Israel. Do not do this outrageous thing. As for me, where could I carry my shame? And as for you, you would be as one of the outrageous fools in Israel.

Now therefore, please speak to the king, for he will not withhold me from you.'". And it seems like Tamar is saying, look, let's do this the right way. Let's talk to the king and he would be willing to bend the rules for you.

As it says in Leviticus 18, it is unlawful for a brother to have intercourse with a sister, even a half sister. But likely Tamar is just saying whatever to get Amnon to let her go. She's not really interested in going and talking to the king about having a right relationship with her half brother.

Verse 14,. "'He would not listen to her and being stronger than she, he violated her and lay with her. Then Amnon hated her with a very great hatred so that the hatred with which he hated her was greater than the love with which he had loved her.

And Amnon said to her, get up, go.'". So he's looking at this girl laying next to him who is no longer this virtuous virgin for she has been violated and he's disgusted by her. Also could be a reminder to him for what it is that he has just done.

And he doesn't want that reminder of his sin so he wants her out of his presence. Verse 16,. "'But she said to him, no my brother for this is wrong and sending me away. This wrong is greater than the other that you just did to me.

But he would not listen to her. He called the young man who served him and said, put this woman out of my presence and bolt the door after her. Now she was wearing a long robe with sleeves for thus were the virgin daughters of the king dressed.

So his servant put her out and bolted the door after her. And Tamar put ashes on her head and tore the long robe that she wore. And she laid her hand on her head and went away crying aloud as she went.".

So when she said to Amnon, this wrong is worse than the wrong that you just did to me because she had been violated and she was no longer a virgin. She was not gonna be seen as worthy of being a wife because she had already been in somebody else's bed.

What would happen to a woman who had either been put out by her husband or had been raped by another man is that she would end up possibly in prostitution or in slavery. So that's what it is that Tamar fears that she's even gonna be put out of the house of the king because she is no longer a virgin.

So she is pleading with Amnon not to put her out. And she tears her robe because she's no longer a virgin. She wears ashes over her head and is weeping because of what it is that has happened to her. And her brother Absalom said to her, has Amnon your brother been with you?

Now hold your peace, my sister, he is your brother. Do not take this to heart. So Tamar lived a desolate woman in her brother Absalom's house. When King David heard of all these things, he was very angry, but Absalom spoke to Amnon neither good nor bad for Absalom hated Amnon because he had violated his sister Tamar.

So here we have the house of David beginning to fall apart. And all of this began with David's sin with Bathsheba. Verse 23, after two full years, Absalom had sheep shearers at Baal Hazer, which is near Ephraim.

And Absalom invited all the king's sons. And Absalom came to the king and said, behold, your servant has sheep shearers. Please let the king and his servants go with your servant. But the king said to Absalom, no, my son, let us not all go lest we be burdensome to you.

He pressed him, but he would not go, but gave him his blessing. Then Absalom said, if not, please let my brother Amnon go with us. And the king said to him, why should he go with you? But Absalom pressed him until he let Amnon and all the king's sons go with him.

Then Absalom commanded his servants, mark when Amnon's heart is merry with wine. And when I say to you, strike Amnon, then kill him. Do not fear. Have I not commanded you? Be courageous and be valiant.

So the servants of Absalom did to Amnon as Absalom had commanded. Then all the king's sons arose and each mounted his mule and fled. While they were on the way, news came to David. Absalom has struck down all the king's sons and not one of them is left.

Then the king arose and tore his garments and lay on the earth. And all his servants who were standing by tore their garments. But Jonadab, the son of Shimea, David's brother said, let not my Lord suppose that they have killed all the young men, the king's sons, for Amnon alone is dead.

For by the command of Absalom, this has been determined from the day he violated his sister Tamar. Now, therefore, let not my Lord, the king, so take it to heart as to suppose that all the king's sons are dead, for Amnon alone is dead.

And of course, we know that not all the king's sons were dead because Solomon would end up becoming the king following David. He would be David's successor. Verse 34, but Absalom fled. And the young men who kept watch lifted up his eyes and looked and behold, many people were coming from the road behind him by the side of the mountain.

And Jonadab said to the king, behold, the king's sons have come. As your servant said, so it has come about. And as soon as he had finished speaking, behold, the king's sons came and lifted up their voice and wept.

And the king also and all his servants wept very bitterly. But Absalom fled and went to Taumai, the son of Ammihud, king of Geshur. And David mourned for his son day after day. So Absalom fled and went to Geshur and was there three years.

And the spirit of the king longed to go out to Absalom because he was comforted about Amnon since he was dead. So why was it that David did not do anything about Amnon when he had the chance? Amnon was David's oldest son.

So it's possible that David did not deal with Amnon because he showed favoritism toward his oldest son. But the other possibility is that David's moral character was beginning to steadily diminish after taking Bathsheba into his bed and then having her husband Uriah the Hittite killed.

And so his moral courage had waned and he did not confront Amnon as he should have. So Absalom took matters into his own hands and now the house of David is beginning to fall apart. So chapter 14 now, Joab the son of Zeruiah knew that the king's heart went out to Absalom.

Joab's Wise Woman and David's Partial Reconciliation with Absalom

And Joab sent to Tekoa and brought from there a wise woman and said to her, pretend to be a mourner and put on mourning garments. Do not anoint yourself with oil, but behave like a woman who has been mourning many days for the dead.

Go to the king and speak thus to him. So Joab put the words in her mouth. When the woman of Tekoa came to the king, she fell on her face to the ground and paid homage and said, save me, O king. And the king said to her, what is your trouble?

She answered, alas, I am a widow. My husband is dead and your servant had two sons and they quarreled with one another in the field. There was no one to separate them and one struck the other and killed him.

And now the whole clan has risen against your servant and they say, give up the man who has struck his brother that we may put him to death for the life of his brother whom he killed. And so they would destroy the heir also.

Thus they would quench my coal that is left and leave to my husband, neither name nor remnant on the face of the earth. Then the king said to the woman, go to your house and I will give orders concerning you.

And the woman of Tekoa said to the king, on me be the guilt, my Lord the king and on my father's house, let the king and his throne be guiltless. The king said, if anyone says anything to you, bring him to me and he shall never touch you again.

Then she said, please let the king invoke the Lord your God that the avenger of blood kill no more and my son be not destroyed. He said, as the Lord lives, not one hair of your son shall fall to the ground.

Basically what's happening here, of course, the woman is saying to David, what Joab has told her to say, but she is asking that the laws demanding the death of a murderer, as we would read in Numbers chapter 35, talking about the avenger of blood, that those laws would not be considered regarding Absalom because now that Amnon is dead, Absalom would be the heir to the throne.

In verse 12, then the woman said, please let your servant speak a word to my Lord the king. And he said, speak. And the woman said, why then have you planned such a thing against the people of God? For in giving this decision, the king convicts himself in as much as the king does not bring his banished one home again.

We must all die. We are like water spilled on the ground, which cannot be gathered up again, but God will not take away life and he devises means so that the banished one will not remain an outcast. Now I have come to say this to my Lord the king because the people have made me afraid and your servant thought, I will speak to the king.

It may be that the king will perform the request of his servant, for the king will hear and deliver his servant from the hand of the man who would destroy me and my son together from the heritage of God.

And your servant thought, the word of my Lord the king will set me at rest for my Lord the king is like the angel of God to discern good and evil. The Lord your God be with you. Then the king answered the woman, do not hide from me anything I ask you.

And the woman said, let my Lord the king speak. The king said, is the hand of Joab with you in all of this? And the woman answered and said, as surely as you live my Lord the king, one cannot turn to the right hand or to the left from anything my Lord the king has said.

It was your servant Joab who commanded me. It was he who put up all these words in my mouth of your servant. In order to change the course of things, your servant Joab did this, but my Lord has wisdom like the wisdom of the angel of God to know all things that are on the earth.

Then the king said to Joab, behold, now I grant this, go bring back the young man Absalom. And Joab fell on his face to the ground and paid homage and blessed the king. And Joab said, today your servant knows that I have found favor in your sight my Lord the king in that the king has granted the request of his servant.

So Joab arose and went to Gesher and brought Absalom to Jerusalem. And the king said, let him dwell apart in his own house. He is not to come into my presence. So Absalom lived apart in his own house and did not come into his father's presence.

Now in all Israel, there was no one so much to be praised for his handsome appearance as Absalom. From the sole of his foot to the crown of his head, there was no blemish in him. And when he cut his hair off of his head, for at the end of every year he used to cut it when it was heavy on him, he would cut it.

He weighed the hair of his head, 200 shekels by the king's weight. There were born to Absalom three sons and one daughter whose name was Tamar. She was a beautiful woman. Now Absalom will say in chapter 18 that he has no sons.

So it's likely that his sons die young and we never know what their names are. Tamar of course would have been named after his sister. Where it mentions that Absalom was such a handsome man, there was no one so much to be praised for his handsome appearance as Absalom.

From the sole of his foot to the crown of his head, there was no blemish in him. If you'll remember back to 1 Samuel chapter 17, the same thing was said of David, that he was a good looking young man.

He was ruddy and handsome in appearance. So Absalom is taking after his father. And the amount of hair that he had, that's significant because that comes back into the story a little bit later on. But 200 shekels would have amounted to about five pounds of hair.

That's a lot of hair. Every year he cut his hair and he would cut five pounds of it off of his head. So verse 28, Absalom lived two full years in Jerusalem without coming into the king's presence. So the king has forgiven Absalom to the point that he's allowing Absalom to come back into Jerusalem, but his pardon of Absalom is not total since he's not allowing Absalom to come into his presence.

Absalom killed David's oldest son. So verse 29, then Absalom sent for Joab to send him to the king, but Joab would not come to him. And he sent a second time, but Joab would not come. Then he said to his servants, see Joab's field is next to mine and he has barley there.

Go set it on fire. So Absalom's servants set the field on fire. Then Joab arose and went to Absalom at his house and said to him, why have your servants set my field on fire? Absalom answered Joab, behold, I sent word to you, come here that I may send you to the king to ask, why have I come from Gesher?

It would be better for me to still be there. Now, therefore, let me go into the presence of the king. And if there is guilt in me, let him put me to death. Then Joab went to the king and told him and he summoned Absalom.

So we came to the king and bowed himself on his face to the ground before the king and the king kissed Absalom. And that's where we will conclude this week and pick up next week with Absalom's conspiracy to take over the throne of Israel.

We started by reading Psalm 32, where David said, blessed is the one whose transgression is forgiven, whose sin is covered. Blessed is the man against whom the Lord counts no iniquity and in whose spirit there is no deceit.

David confessed himself before God and God forgave him, but he is still reaping what he has sown. And not only is his house falling apart, but the consequences for David's sin is coming upon all of Israel as well.

So we should not have this attitude of, hey, I can just do whatever and God is going to forgive me for it. We need to walk in the paths of righteousness that have been set out for us by God in his word.

Psalm 23, the Lord is my shepherd, I shall not want. He makes me lie down in green pastures. He leads me beside still waters. He restores my soul. He leads me in paths of righteousness for his name's sake.

Let us do what is pleasing to the Lord because we love God. Jesus said to his disciples, you will show me that you love me when you obey what I command. So let us seek the Lord and ask that his word would be revealed to us and we would do what is holy and pleasing in the sight of God.

In the name of his son, Jesus.

Amen. Thank you for listening to When We Understand the Text with Pastor Gabe Hughes. If you'd like to support this ministry, visit our website, www .wutt .com and click on the Give tab in the top right corner of the page.

Join us again tomorrow as we continue our Bible study, When We Understand the Text.