Self-Sacrifice Or Sexual Selfishness? - [Ephesians 5:1-7]

Guten Morgen.

Just got back last night from Germany.

Thank you for your prayers.

I'm an adjunct faculty member of the European Bible Training Center, and I probably go over there

about every 18 months.

In the last week, I taught a class on preaching to men who are in Germany, in Switzerland,

and also in the Czech Republic.

That was Monday through Friday, about 8 to 4 or so.

Sunday, last Sunday morning, I preached at a church plant in downtown Berlin.

And then Monday night, I did kind of a men's barbecue, ate a bunch of meat, and then I was given

the task to teach on sexual fidelity.

So it was a whirlwind trip, but I'm glad to be back.

And you know, you travel and you think, the Lord is building His church, not just in Massachusetts,

but all across the world.

And every elect person will come to faith, and God has His men and women strategically

placed.

Sometimes I think selfishly, and when I fly, I would like to just get a spot by myself, away from

everyone else.

I mean, God forbid, I'd have to talk to somebody as a pastor.

I'd like to sleep or study.

Well, flying from Tegel yesterday to Dublin, from Berlin to Dublin, I talked to a

flight attendant and I said, you know, I know with Erlingus, if there's not a person in the extra legroom thing, they

try to fill those up.

And I said, if that's open, you know, by the way, at the end, I'd love to sit there.

She said, okay, I'll tell you.

So just before we flew off, she said, you can sit there.

And there was a guy two spots over, one seat in between us.

And I sat down, I immediately noticed he had a Ravi Zacharias book.

And I said, oh, Ravi Zacharias.

And we began to talk.

And for two hours, I answered questions about Romans 9, and how could God harden Pharaoh's

heart and all these things.

He lives on the North Shore, and I think probably one day he'll just swing by for a visit here at Bethlehem

Bible Church.

So that was really exciting.

He's studying new Christian authors, he wants to learn and grow.

So that was a lot of fun.

I thought, Lord, you know, I'm tired, I need to get home, but this is good.

It's good to serve anyway.

Thank you.

Well, then I had a seven -hour flight from, oh, as I see Harry, by the way, thank you for preaching.

I heard good things.

I had a seven -hour flight from Dublin to Boston.

And I sat down, you don't know who's going to be sitting next to you, hopefully no one.

And I sat down, and right next to me was a lady.

I said, hello.

I got to meet her a little bit, and talk to her, and have a little background.

By the way, this isn't really sermon material, this is just, I love you, here's an update of what happened.

But maybe I can tie it into the sermon.

I think I can.

I said, what do you do for a living?

She said, I'm a psychotherapist.

I thought, this is going to be so fun.

I can't wait.

And we begin to talk a little bit more, and she's a psychotherapist here in New England.

She was married, divorced her husband, she had two children, and now she's a psychotherapist, Jewish,

lesbian, divorced, and now has this partner.

She said, what do you do?

I said, I'm an evangelical pastor, I teach the Bible.

She said, in all my time, I've never sat next to a person who knows the New Testament.

And I said, yes, I have, and yes, I do know the New Testament.

Here's what I was doing.

She said, well, how did you become a pastor?

How did that work?

I thought, this is just like slow pitch.

I have seven hours to tee this thing up.

By the way, I'm giving you the condensed version.

I was very kind, very sweet.

I said, you know, if you have an anger problem, you get anger management.

You know, maybe you have a syndrome or a disease or an illness, there's things maybe you could do.

But if the real problem is sin on the inside, I personally didn't have an anger problem, I

was the problem.

So the real question is that I have for you, the psychotherapist, how do you get a new you?

She told me she was Jewish, and I said, that reminds me of a man named Nicodemus who went at night to talk to Jesus.

He was the most religious teacher in all of Israel, Jewish, and he knew.

His own conscience told him he was a sinner.

You look out and you see the clouds and the sun and the moon, and you know you're a sinner that way too with natural revelation.

And Nicodemus didn't need more therapy.

He didn't need more circumcision rites.

He didn't need anything else.

He needed to have a new him.

That's what it means to be born again, to trust alone in Jesus, the Messiah, and have him raised from the dead.

She goes, oh, that's interesting.

Then she said, what do you do if one of your kids says, I am a homosexual?

I said, well, I'd tell them there's nothing you can do to make me not love you, but

homosexuality is a sin.

Then it started getting real hot in there.

I saw her kind of, can you open up that little vent up there?

So we talked a little bit more, and I think we ended as friends.

I looked up her name, and I found out her practice, and I'm going to send her a little care package,

compliments of Bethlehem Bible Church.

Now, while Jane, the psychotherapist, might have had a torqued view of sexuality,

sometimes even in the church, the world's view of sexuality filters in.

Actually, it doesn't just filter in.

It just comes in full steam ahead.

If I were to ask you this morning, do you think about this topic, sexual ethics, in a Christian manner

or in a worldly manner?

What defines the way you think about this?

This lady specialized in transgendered counseling.

What about sexual ethics, sexual purity, sexual holiness?

Now, I have my Hebrews 2, 5 to 9 message done.

It's completed.

But what you don't know is Dave Jeffries is here, and every time Dave Jeffries is here, I preach from a particular book.

Dave showed up to the church many years ago when I was preaching this book, and since Dave's here again, I want to preach from this book.

Not because I'm not ready, but because this is an important subject.

It's a pastoral heart issue.

As I talked to the men in Europe, and then as I was thinking about Jane, the psychotherapist, I thought, the

real question is, what about Bethlehem Bible Church?

What about you?

Do you think rightly about sexual ethics?

So I'd like you to take your Bible and turn to the book of Ephesians, Ephesians chapter 5.

Many of you were here when we went verse by verse.

I'll do some of that today, but I want to talk about sexual ethics and holiness

and God's view of this.

The world is sex crazed, from commercials to Super Bowl halftime to

walking around in Europe, you just have to basically close your eyes sometimes, but it's the same way now in

America.

Today's society is basically like Judah and Jeremiah.

They were well -fed, lusty horses, each one naying after his neighbor's

wife.

Glenn Wood and John Dietrich said, quote, a society spends the most time and energy, once the basic

necessities of life are satisfied, on what it deems most important.

In Hebrew and Puritan writings, one can hardly read a single paragraph without

encountering a reference to God Almighty.

What items have replaced God in our communications media?

Sex, money, and self -love, they are the gods of the new age.

We're going to see in the book of Ephesians that God's love is a giving love,

and everything that has to do with sexual sin is a taking.

While God's love gives, sexual sin takes.

And you'll see this in chapter 5.

It's like night and day.

And I like it because it's very simple for me to think binarily.

Is that a word?

Binarily?

In a binary fashion.

God's love gives, sexual sin takes.

And then we can ask ourselves a question as we walk through this, to what degree are we influenced by this?

And sadly, many are influenced.

And I wonder even, I won't make you do it, obviously, but how many people, even in this congregation, look

at pornography or look at ladies too long?

So is there hope for the sexual sinner?

Is there a strategy for sexual purity?

When God said, be holy for I am holy, He meant it.

So what do we do as Christians?

Now, remember, whenever we go to a book, we think about the theme.

And the theme of Ephesians is the exaltation of Christ Jesus and His glory in the

church.

Everything happens to do with, everything revolves around Jesus, and it was planned from eternity past.

There's language in chapter one about predestination and election and purpose and calling.

Chapter two, this great Jesus, only He can take dead sinners who are

enslaved to Satan and the world and make them alive together.

Only He offers grace.

And the response is faith.

Only He can take Jews and Gentiles in chapter two and make peace with God and peace

with each other.

Everything revolves around the personal work of Christ as God has planned this in all eternity.

Chapter three, Paul, this Jewish man, becomes a Gentile apostle, a apostle to the

Gentiles, as this is in the plan of God.

And as you know, doctrine isn't neutral.

And so all this doctrine leads to chapters four, five, and six, how do we live in light of who we are in Christ?

Since Christ has saved us and reconciled us and redeemed us, He's been raised from the

dead, and now He calls us to live a certain way.

And if you go to chapter four, verse one, here's the hinge between doctrine and duty,

or credenda and agenda.

Creed means you have a right conduct.

I, therefore, a prisoner of the Lord, urge you to walk in a manner worthy of the

calling to which you have been called.

The calling that we have is weighty.

I think about pewter and how heavy pewter is.

And in light of this heavy, weighty, full of gravity calling who we are in Christ,

then we are to try to balance things out.

You've seen me use this illustration before if I was weighing things, and here's the, what do you call the center thing, not a focal

point, but the what?

A what?

A focal point, a fulcrum.

Yes, okay.

I thought it was a fulcrum point.

You know, I learned a few German words this week, but I did not learn that.

Good now?

Okay.

Here's the weight of Ephesians one, two, and three.

And so the way you live, you try to balance it out.

Not because it earns your salvation, not because it earns you God's pleasure, but since you are children,

like I would say to my children, your ebendroths act like it.

This is, as we've heard many times, conduct befitting an officer.

And we move to chapter five, as Paul has filled in the old life and the new life in chapter four, and we move to

chapter five, and it's just, it's just shocking.

When do you hear language like this?

Whoever says this, and who says it like this?

Therefore be imitators of God.

If you just stop there and think about it, what if I were to tell you the key to sanctification, the key to

moral purity, the key to holy living in general is this, act like God.

Ready?

I'm gonna count to three, and when I do, one, two, three, you start imitating God.

One, two, three, go.

I mean, it's almost too big of a subject.

So what does it mean to imitate God?

And you're gonna see in chapter five, verses one and following, you imitate God by giving,

not taking.

That's who God is.

He gives and gives and gives, and sexual sin takes and takes and

takes.

The opposite of giving is taking, and here we have the way Christ is

learned.

You notice even back in chapter four, verse 20, with language that's almost as

peculiar as Ephesians 5 .1, but that is not the way you learned

Christ.

Now, we might think you learn about Jesus, Christology.

These are the things about Jesus.

No, this is a personal Jesus.

How do you learn Jesus?

Well, you don't learn Jesus by taking.

You show yourself by giving.

The church in Ephesus might have learned Diana, give, give, give, sex through worship, or worship

through sex.

Give me, give me, give me.

That's how you learn this false God, Diana, in Ephesus, but that's not how you learn Christ.

Self -indulgence or self -sacrifice, that is the question in every area of life,

especially this area.

Imitate God.

It says in chapter five, verse one, be imitators.

Technically, it's become imitators of God as beloved

children.

Now, Paul has said in 1 Corinthians 4, imitate me.

Ever ask yourself the question, why would Paul say imitate me?

Well, as he imitates Christ, yes, but sometimes we want to imitate Paul because there are areas in our life we could never

imitate Jesus.

Jesus never sinned, so how do you imitate Jesus if you've sinned and you'd

like to be restored into a relationship with God again as a child, in a family setting?

Well, Paul has sinned, and then he's had quick repentance.

We could follow Paul in that area where we could never follow Jesus because he never sinned, yet here it says

imitators of God.

Mimic God, that's the Greek word to mimic God.

This word means to mime, to pantomime, to copy.

And when I say mime, we have enough WPI people here.

I'm not talking about multipurpose internet mail extensions either.

How'd you like, I just threw that in for you.

You know when you say that and people laugh that the congregation's pretty nerdy.

And if you're nerdy, what must I be, right?

Lloyd -Jones, we are to mimic God.

Is this possible?

Is this not gross exaggeration?

Has not the apostle run away with himself and allowed his eloquence to dazzle him?

Is he seriously asking men and women like ourselves living in a world like this, surrounded by temptations,

harassed by the devil with sin and evil and unworthiness within us to be imitators of God?

Is it possible?

And we know it's possible because what does the Bible go on to say?

It goes on to say right there, as beloved, what?

Children.

He is not saying you imitate God in order that you can be a Christian.

But since you are a Christian, imitate God.

As beloved children, as loved children.

Children show themselves to be your real children when they want to grow up to be like you.

I stayed with Marco and Katrina this week and they have three children, Gabriel,

Caleb, and Isabel.

And about four months ago, that family was with us in California and we were walking around looking at these redwood trees.

And Luke, my son, was playing with those three, especially the two boys, Gabriel and Caleb.

I don't know how old they are, four and three or something like that.

And these little boys had sticks and they were making these sticks into guns.

And they were running up to little one -year -old Isabel, shooting her and running up to mom, Katrina, and

shooting her.

And Luke, my son, went over with Gabriel and Caleb and said, boys, guns are fine, but we

don't shoot mom and our sister.

We shoot the bad guys.

So you never shoot the family, you protect the family.

And as I was watching Luke, I go, I've been trying to teach Luke for 20 years, he finally has learned one lesson.

Yes, he's growing up to be like his dad.

And so see, we're children of God.

We're not trying to earn, I mean, Luke's not earning his place in the family, but he is a child, and now he's

becoming more and more like his father.

How can you imitate God?

God's this holy God, this God who loves, and you just become more and more like Him as you progress in Christian

sanctification.

Your father's loved you.

And you responded to your father with imitation, admiration, following.

And what does this look like?

If you had to describe what imitating God looks like, it's very simple, and I've already said it, but our outline today is,

if you'd like to imitate God in every area, including sexual ethics,

number one, you sacrifice.

Number two, you aren't selfish.

Super simple, give not take.

What does imitating God look like?

Number one, by self -sacrificial giving.

It says in verse two, walk in love.

This is what imitating God looks like.

Walk in love as Christ loved us and gave Himself up for us, a

fragrant offering and sacrifice to God.

Paul talks about walking in love in chapter four, and now he says it here as well.

To walk in love.

He's not talking about literal walking, it's just talking about your life, your lifestyle, your conduct,

your behavior.

Sometimes teachers walk back and forth and they say it's peripatetic walking.

Peripatetic walking, that's what the word is here.

To walk about.

Didn't he say it in chapter four, verse one?

To walk in a manner worthy of your calling.

Did he not say in Ephesians 4 .17, must no longer walk as Gentiles do in the

futility of their minds?

Now you live a lifestyle.

You live a lifestyle of love.

And how does love show itself?

Doesn't it tell us?

Just as Christ also loved you.

For God so loved the world, He gave.

God the Father gives, and Christ does too.

Christ also loved you.

This is the greatest illustration of love, of course, in the universe.

Jesus isn't using, He's sacrificing.

He's loving.

This is the model for the child of God.

Jesus lays down His life for us, so we want to lay down our lives for other people.

Greater love has no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends, John 15 .13.

Jesus is the greatest example.

Galatians 2 .20, Jesus loved me, Paul said, and gave Himself

for me.

First John 3 .16, we know, loved by this, that He laid down His life for us, and we ought to lay down our

lives for our brethren.

This is the model, this is the extreme example, and the best

example.

And look at the language here, it's substitutionary atonement language, for us.

He gave Himself up for us.

This is the language of instead of, on behalf of.

Hupere is the Greek word, in place of.

And I like how Paul explains it, a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God.

He's just borrowing sacrificial terms from Judaism, saying this is what God thinks of it.

He thinks of it in a wonderful way, in a great way.

The sacrificial death of Jesus smells good to God.

It's a fragrant aroma, it pleases Him.

To what degree does it please Him?

Romans 4 says, God raises Him from the dead.

It's a love that gives.

It just smells good.

I don't know about you, but when I travel internationally, I go straight and I have a layover, I had a four -hour

layover in Dublin yesterday.

Besides double espresso and besides salmon sandwiches that they serve in Dublin,

I said, I'll take a salmon sandwich.

And they said, pardon me?

I said, a salmon sandwich.

They said, okay, fine.

What I do, and I'm sorry to admit this, but I have 20 years now here at the church, almost, so I almost have tenure.

I go straight over to Duty Free, where they have all the colognes and fragrances.

I mean, I've been traveling several hours by now and I figured it might be good to use.

And I go straight over and I find the most expensive Giorgio Armani cologne that I can

find.

Not the 30 euros, not the 50 euros, not the 80 euros.

I like like 95 euro cologne is what I like.

And by the way, I don't know, we've started here before I talked about monster drinks and there was a monster drink up here.

Now I have all of a sudden more candies and stuff for Pastor Mike, just in case.

All these things, nerds, airheads.

I mean, seriously, I could read you what was up here.

I'd like dark chocolate is what I really like.

So just to let you know, nothing Hershey's or anything.

But I go over there and I'm not kidding.

I go for the 100 euro best cologne.

And you're supposed to spray it on a little strip and act all cool.

I just look around, a couple of sprays, I'm good.

Spray it in the air.

We don't do that.

It just smells good.

What's the opposite of a fragrant aroma?

Especially in an airport.

Well, here, the sacrifice of Jesus because it was so self -giving.

He didn't even think equality with God was a thing to be grasped.

He gave himself and he was obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross.

That's give, give, give.

The Father was well pleased with that.

It didn't smell, it didn't reek in a bad way.

It was a wonderful aroma.

And you could just imagine what the aromas do.

You go camping and you smell bacon in the morning or coffee in the morning or cologne in the airport.

Well pleasing.

The blood of bulls and goats can't please God ultimately.

Whole burnt offerings and sacrifices for sin, Hebrews 10, you have taken no pleasure.

But the sacrifice of Jesus, we know he has taken pleasure in him.

If I was going to use it metaphorically, I could say God has a keen sense of smell.

And he's continuing the line of what he said in chapter four, verse 31, isn't

he?

And verse 32, let's look at verse 32.

Remember chapter five, verse one has a therefore, it's just tied in.

It's the same kind of language.

How does God want us to live?

He wants us to walk in self -sacrificial love.

You wanna imitate God?

Walk in love.

He's already tipped his hand.

Be kind to one another.

Same language, not just be kind, but become kind.

Like he says, become imitators, exact same word.

Become kind to one another.

Remember the way you used to live?

Don't live that way anymore.

Be kind to one another.

Consideration for others.

What else does he say?

Tenderhearted, become tenderhearted.

Moved on the inside because of someone's distress.

Even God himself, it says in Luke six, was kind to ungrateful and evil men.

This is like an expansion of walking in love.

Do you notice what it says?

Become forgivers, forgiving each other.

That's not the normal word for forgiveness.

This is the word grace, gracing one another.

Just as God in Christ has also graced you.

Even our English word forgiven or forgive, for and what's the second part of it?

Give, you want to be walking in love?

You want to have a mimicking God approach?

You give, you give graciously, you give generously, you give self -sacrificially and that even means you

give forgiveness.

Milton said this is unbelievable generosity to give.

Lloyd -Jones said, I say to the glory of God and in utter humility that whenever I see myself before God and

realize even something of what my blessed Lord has done for me, I am ready to forgive

anybody, anything, except my wife,

except that other guy at church, except my neighbor.

You want to imitate God because you are children?

Here's what God does.

God self -sacrificially gives not only His Son, but also forgiveness.

And it's modeled here after God's love for us, just as, that's the reason,

just as what?

In verse 32 of chapter four, Christ forgave you, past historical fact,

accomplished, done, once and for all.

That's how you forgive people based on that fact.

That's real love.

So when it comes to saying to yourself, I know that I'm in Christ, I have union with Him, I'm able to obey by the Spirit's

power, Ephesians one.

How do I imitate God?

How do I live in this kind of world?

Well, the first way we live in this world is we say, we give sacrificially, we walk in love.

Love is a sacrificial love, what wants what's best for its object, just like Jesus did

for us.

But then there's the awful opposite.

Here's what love doesn't, here's what love should not look like.

Verses three and following in chapter five.

You can tell it's tied together with the word, the connecting word, but in verse three.

You've got these great passages in chapter four, verse 32 and five, one and two, and walk in

love and Christ forgives and forgive one another, just as Christ has forgiven you.

It is give, give, give, sacrificial agape love, laying down your life for sinful people.

And now we move to the opposite, we move to the different side, we move to the take, take, take.

Imitating God means you're self -sacrificial in your love to others, and now

you're not a taker.

The opposite of love probably could be take, because love, God's love, gives.

When God changes you, everything in your life is changed.

Even your personal life, even your private life, even your thought life, and even your sex

life.

Verse three, but sexual immorality, it's a tie -in.

This is not imitating God, this is not what children do, this is not walking in love, this is not how Christ

loved us.

Jesus didn't do this for us as he gave himself up for us.

It's not fragrant, it's not a sacrifice to God, it's the exact opposite.

Sexual immorality and all impurity are covetous, must not even be named among you, as it's

improper, it's not proper among the saints.

Let there be no filthiness, nor foolish talk, nor crude joking.

This is all sexual context here, which are out of place.

But instead, let there be thanksgiving.

It's important to see the connection between five, one, and two, and verse three.

But, are the Greek word de.

He's trying to say these things are categorically opposite.

Jesus loves and gives, and sexual sin takes.

Diametrically opposed.

Sot said self -sacrifice of verse one and two turns to self -indulgence, verses three and following.

Action, conduct, speech, it covers everything.

God is pure, he's not impure like these talk about.

He's loving, he gives, he doesn't take.

He's not self -indulgent, or selfish, or self -centered.

Now, let me say it early on, he is not talking about marital sex.

That is in the category of Hebrews 13, four, isn't it?

The marriage bed is undefiled.

But anything outside of a marriage bed between a man and a woman who are married, whether it's in your mind,

you say, I don't click on pornography, but it goes on in my mind.

Or with actions, this is all underneath this that is exactly opposite of who God is.

This is not what God's children should be doing.

Verse three, but immorality, don't let it be named among you.

Immorality is porneia, that's a general term.

It's an all -encompassing term.

Anything aberrant, anything out of the marriage bed kind of talk, this word includes.

Prostitution, pornography, homosexuality, premarital sex, it's

all covered here.

Lust, we're talking about sinful sexual things.

Not just sex and marriage, I wanna make that clear.

Now see, what does the world do?

Hey, as long as you love each other, it's fine.

As long as you just don't go all the way, it's fine.

You know, you talk to teens, they wanna know.

You show me a teen that's immature and not thinking rightly, how far can we go without actually doing things all

the way?

Well, you're just asking how far can I be involved in porneia before it's not ultimate porneia?

And if this isn't inclusive enough, he says then what?

Any impurity, all impurity in the ESV.

Catharizo is the word, and now you just put an A in front of it.

Things that are cleansed and purified, put an alpha privative in front of it, now it's just the opposite.

Just dirty things, filthy things.

This is used about 11 other times.

It's always used for sexual sins with one exception.

Woe to you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites.

You're like whitewashed tombs, which on the outside appear beautiful, but on the inside they're full of dead men's bones

and all, exact same word, uncleanness, impurity.

Thoughts, ideas, same word used in Galatians 5.

The deeds of the flesh are evident, impurity.

And now it's interesting in verse three.

More language of take, take, take, take.

Immorality takes, impurity takes, covetousness or greed.

The context is sexual desire.

Wanting someone or something that's not yours.

God said, don't covet your neighbor's wife to the Israelites.

And now you think, you know what?

There's something that's not mine, but I want it.

Or it could mean never getting enough of this particular passion.

Self -satisfaction, seeking that over and over and over.

Insatiable behavior.

And this kind of thing, what does the text say?

Since we are children, since God has redeemed us by the work of the Lamb, this shouldn't even be named among you.

Must not be named even among you, it says the church.

No occasion.

This language, the language of the world with its sexual take, take, take, shouldn't make it odd for us.

It should be like, this is a different language.

Don't tolerate this kind of language.

Don't accept it.

Don't be convinced by the world this is right.

Herodotus, the historian said, one may not speak about what one may

not do.

And there's a strong negative in the Greek.

Don't even talk about this.

Do you remember the Israelites?

They weren't even to talk about their gods.

Do not even mention the name of other gods or let them be heard from your mouth, Exodus 23.

I don't even wanna hear one of their names, God says, from your mouth.

Don't take their name upon their lips, Psalm 16.

Why?

What's the text say?

It's not proper.

It's not fitting.

Present tense, it's never fitting.

It's never proper.

Among, out of all people, saints, holy ones, pure ones.

Doesn't help.

Doesn't become you.

And the problem is, the world just sells

us like crazy.

Chastity is no virtue in this world.

Since we shouldn't even talk about this, friends, if you're involved in any pornography, if you're involved in

any sexual sin, then you ought to run.

The Bible says, flee immorality.

Every other sin that a man commits is outside the body, but the immoral man sins against his own computer.

And I spoke about this topic to the men in Germany and some Russian men as well, Monday night.

I said, I got a call one time from an emailer from a no -compromise listener, and she said, my husband's involved in

pornography.

He won't stop.

I've tried, I've talked, I begged, I pleaded.

What should I do?

I said, well, what does he, how does he access it?

She said, the computer.

She said, what do I do?

I said, are you really asking for my advice?

I said, yes.

I mean, the other way around.

I said, I want you to take that laptop, that MacBook Pro, I want you to take it to the shed with that

sledgehammer, and I want you to blast it into a million pieces.

Yeah, well, I don't think I could do that.

Well, when it comes to Matthew and radically dealing with sin, didn't that Jesus says, take your left hand and what?

Cut it off.

He's talking about radical dealing with sin.

To my knowledge so far as a pastor, only once in 20 years has someone said, you know, I have a problem with pornography,

and I'm even willing to get a new job where I don't have to have a computer access.

Don't even let this stuff be named and talked about.

Friends, it's everywhere.

I now, sadly, have to say to the discipleship group, I said it to the men in Germany, and I say it to the group

I'm meeting with here at Bethlehem Bible Church.

Now, what you've done in the past, God can forgive, and God's death in his son is certainly

sufficient for all sins, including sexual sins.

But beginning next week, I'm gonna ask you, we're gonna go around the table, and I will say, I have not looked at pornography or

texted people inappropriately this week.

And then you are going to say it.

Around the room we go.

That is where we are now in the state of America and evangelicalism.

And you can just imagine what Paul would be thinking.

He's like, you don't worship Diana anymore.

You're called to be clean.

You're called to be pure, because that's what it means to imitate God.

Somebody on the computer down in the basement on a computer is not imitating God when he's looking at

pixels, is he?

This is big business.

Luke told me about someone at college, and they were explaining this issue because it goes on there.

And a particular young lady was asked by a man, a young man at college.

It wasn't Luke, but he knows a person.

The man said to the young lady, would you like to go out with me?

And she was trained by her father and her mother to say a variety of things, including have you looked at

pornography in the last six months?

And he said, well, it's been about four months.

And she said, call me in two months and we'll see.

You can see when Solomon says in Proverbs 6, the commandment is a lamp, the teaching is a

light, the reproofs for discipline are a way of life to keep you from the evil woman, from the smooth tongue of the

adulterous.

And it goes the other way as well.

It is the man and the woman who are married.

The husband must fulfill his duty to his wife and likewise also to the wife, also her husband.

That is the biblical setup.

Say, well, I don't really do it and kind of watch it, but I talk about it.

Verse four, is this mimicking God?

Is this love, sacrificial agape love epitomized at Calvary?

We're not supposed to do it, but we're not even supposed to talk about it.

There goes all the soap operas.

Verse four, and there must be what?

No filthiness.

Let there be no filthiness, foolish talk or crude joking.

They're out of place.

The context is sexual talk.

Don't joke about it, don't talk about it.

The first word found is filthiness.

It means indecent.

NIV translates it, obscenity.

Something that's shameful, something that's weird, deformed, silly talk, foolish talk, stupid

words.

All the context of sex, trash mouth, gutter talk.

Foolish in his heart, there's no God.

He talks like it too.

And then it says what?

Here's the one where we can fall for if we're not careful.

Crude joking, coarse jesting.

This is the person that he can turn.

It literally has the Greek, has a word turn.

So anything that anyone says, this particular person can turn it into the sex talk.

Double innuendo, making kind of comments.

Skillfully doing it, but sinfully as well.

You don't even talk about it.

You don't even listen to it, let alone watch it.

Diana had the sexual orgies for her worship.

For the Christian, it's not fitting.

It's out of place.

Doesn't the text say it?

Which are out of place.

Ignorance is bliss when it comes to sex sin.

There's no time it's fitting.

The text says it's out of place.

And I wanna tell you, friends, it's out of place at work.

It's out of place when you're online.

It's out of place at church.

It's even out of place in counseling.

People wanna talk about some of their things that they've done and to get forgiveness.

They can use just words.

Just general terms and we can discuss it.

It's out of place.

So what do you do?

Paul says in chapter four, you put off, you put on.

Stop lying, tell the truth.

Stop stealing, get a job.

And he does this put on, put off stuff.

He does the same thing here.

If I'm not gonna let all this stuff come out of my mouth because I'm a child of God now, what should I do instead?

All those vices replaced with one thing and it's brilliant.

And if you don't think about it, you miss it.

But rather, verse four, give thanks.

This is the exact opposite.

Sexual sin and talk about it, think about it and all this other stuff, it's give, give, give.

Gimme, gimme, gimme, gimme, gimme.

And thanks, even when we say you give thanks, you realize everything we have comes from God and therefore we

give.

Thankfulness is the exact opposite of selfishness.

Say, well, Thanksgiving doesn't seem to be the opposite for like some kind of sexual joke.

But as a sexual joke is self -centered, now thankfulness is centered on God.

One pastor said, do you know why you are to give thanks?

Because it's the most unselfish thing you can do.

Instead of seeking selfish things like sexual fulfillment, uncleanness and coveting, you're to be thankful.

Instead of wanting everything from everybody, instead of wanting to take, why don't you love in a way that says,

thanks.

Sex isn't sinful, sex isn't dirty.

But all sex when it's talked about properly should be talked about with God in mind.

He designed it, He gave it to couples.

It's a great gift, it's His beauty, His kindness.

That's how dads and moms talk to their children.

When you talk about sex, you talk about it with God in mind.

And then you thank Him.

That's the contrast between sexual sin and thanksgiving.

God says sex is very good in marriage.

The world says the opposite.

So as you think about this in your own life, say, well, is it really that big a deal?

Verse five, for you may be sure of this.

There are two words for to know in Greek.

You put both of them together and you have a double emphasis.

Intellectual knowledge with experiential knowledge means certainty.

You may know surely this, that everyone who is sexually immoral, we're talking about lifestyle,

we're talking about practice, or impure, or who is covetous,

that is an idolater, has no inheritance in the kingdom of God and in Christ.

A lot of people are gonna try to deceive you, say it's okay.

Let no one, I don't care if he's a pastor or on YouTube, deceive you with empty words.

For because of these things, the wrath of God comes upon the sons of disobedience.

Don't be partners with them.

See what Paul is trying to do?

If God's nature is to give and to love and to sacrifice and to rescue

and to be concerned about the object of his love, his son, the elect, the church,

children do the same thing.

Oh, not perfectly, there's immaturity, but you see that,

it's part of their life.

On the flip side, there's another person who's a father and his name is Satan.

And when you're watching and following this father of lies, then that father says, you know what?

What God says, it's not really true and it's deceiving.

Real children of God will say, holiness is important.

I wanna imitate God because sexual sin is the exact opposite.

It doesn't imitate God.

It's like idolatry.

It's like, well, you know what?

I don't worship money, but I love something more than God and it's sexual sin.

These people need to be saved.

Revelation chapter 21 says, for the cowardly and unbelieving and abominable and murderers and

immoral sexual people will not inherit the kingdom of God.

They will be burning in the lake of fire and brimstone, which is the second death.

So when I look at the book of Ephesians and I think about the problem that I see, maybe with ladies as well, but with

men in evangelicalism, whether it's in Germany or this church,

my response to you is not, let me give you 12 steps.

Let me give you 10 ways.

Let me give you 40 days.

My response is when you focus on the person and work of Christ Jesus, who's the giving God, Paul says,

you become imitators of him.

That's where the key is.

It's the nature, it's the root, it's beloved children follow a certain way, they give and they don't take.

First Thessalonians, let no man transgress and defraud his

brother in the matter because the Lord is avenger of these sex sins, just as we told you before and solemnly

warned you.

For God has not called us for the purpose of impurity, but sanctification, that is

sexual sanctification.

And for all of us, isn't 1 Corinthians true?

All of us who are Christians, maybe today you're here, you realize you're not a Christian because you have no control over your sexual life,

no control over immorality, then you want to ask yourself, how could I be a Christian?

But for those of us who are Christians, we realize those sins and many other sins

forgiven.

And the text says in 1 Corinthians 6, and such were some of you, but you are what?

Washed.

Think about all the sexual sins in your mind or with your body or with your hands or on the computer, all cleansed

and washed.

Wouldn't you like to be washed?

Wouldn't you like to be washed?

That's through the blood of Christ, faith in Christ Jesus, but you were sanctified.

Yeah, gutter mouth, living in the gutter, prostitution essentially, and then you go, I'm sanctified and

cleansed.

Wouldn't you like to be cleansed?

And you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus and the spirit of our God.

I know you, and I know many of you follow Christ and our beloved children.

So imitate God, imitate God by giving and not by taking.

And don't let Satan fool you and say, well, a little pornography is going to be no big deal.

I'm quite convinced that pornography has something to do with sexuality, but much to do with

laziness, because you have to go and work

to become a godly young man to win that wife or vice versa.

You've got to be a husband who works and loves his wife as Christ loved the church.

I don't have many German words that I know, but I grew up not talking about washing, but

we grew up talking about washing.

Are you washed in the blood?

Are you washed in the cleansing blood of the Lamb?

As God looks at sinners, he sees all of them who are believing on the Lord Jesus Christ,

wearing white on their wedding day and every other day.

Isn't that good?

Cleansed and washed.

Let's not go back to the old lifestyle.

Maybe you young men, I'll see you next week and ask you a simple question.

Did you look at pornography this week?

I'm not a fundamentalist, but I love you enough to know that there is repentance and we ought to stop doing some of these very

things.

Let's pray.

I pray, Father, today for the sexual purity of Bethlehem Bible Church, myself, and

the rest.

Why?

Because it gives you honor.

We reflect your nature of a God that gives and a God who's holy

and a God that sacrifices.

We don't want to act like people who are like Satan, essentially, taking

through deception and coveting.

So, Father, I pray.

I pray that you would guard our church from sexual scandal and the leadership in every place else.

I pray for the young people, that you would help them understand what the text says, that you would

help them to understand the gravity of this.

Old people as well, married couples.

I especially pray, Father, for those that are enslaved to pornography.

They say they struggle with it, but they're not struggling in it.

They're indulging themselves.

Would you grant them repentance?

Would you give them the power that's found in the cross and the resurrection?

Father, I pray for the marriages as well, that husband and wife might love one another, as 1 Corinthians 7

talks about, so there would be a place where we can talk about it and enjoy it and give you

thanks since you created it.

How could we ever imitate you without your strength and without your grace?

We could never do it.

We're thankful that we see the example of Jesus loving us and giving himself up for us, but he also then

not only gave himself for us, but he gave us a spirit, his Holy Spirit who's just like him

because he's a member of the Trinity to dwell within us so we could say no.

Help men break the porn addictions that they have.

It's not an addiction.

It's just imitating Satan.

And we'll praise you for it in Jesus' name, amen.