Guarding the Honor of Marriage (Hebrews 13:4) | Worship Service

Kootenai Church iconKootenai Church

3 views

This stream is created with #PRISMLiveStudio

0 comments

09:51
Good morning. Good morning and welcome to Kootenai Church today. Would you please stand as we begin our service this morning with a call to worship from Psalm 145.
10:02
And it says, I will exalt you, my God, O King, and I will bless your name forever and ever.
10:09
Every day I will bless you and I will praise your name forever and ever. Great is Yahweh and highly to be praised, and his greatness is unsearchable.
10:20
One generation shall laud your works to another and shall declare your mighty deeds. On the glorious splendor of your majesty and on the words of your wondrous deeds,
10:30
I will muse. Men shall speak of the strength of your fearsome acts, and I will recount your greatness.
10:38
They shall pour forth the memory of your abundant goodness and will shout joyfully of your righteousness.
10:45
Yahweh is gracious and compassionate, slow to anger and great and loving kindness.
10:51
So let's begin our music this morning and sing how great. I'll bless your name,
11:11
O God, each day that I awake. From dawn to setting sun, your greatness
11:20
I'll proclaim. Your glory far exceeds all human thought.
11:29
So with each breath I'll bless your name, O God. Your name will be revered by children yet to come.
11:43
As generations sing of wonders you have done, your strong and mighty deeds are always near.
11:56
O God most high, your name will be revered.
12:03
How great is the Lord and greatly to be praised.
12:10
How great is the Lord our God. How great is the
12:19
Lord and greatly to be praised. Your gracious hand provides for all who live and breathe.
12:32
Your mercy runs to find the helpless and the weak.
12:38
When we call out to you, you hear our cries.
12:45
And all our needs your gracious hand provides.
12:52
How great is the Lord and greatly to be praised.
12:59
How great is the Lord our God. How great is the
13:08
Lord and greatly to be praised. Without end creation will rejoice.
13:31
When works of wicked men you finally destroy.
13:38
Your power will proclaim till Christ ascends.
13:45
And you will reign forever without end.
13:52
How great is the Lord and greatly to be praised.
13:59
How great is the Lord our God. How great is the
14:08
Lord and greatly to be praised.
14:15
And greatly to be praised. God we've seen your faithfulness.
14:51
You brought us from the wilderness. But now our faith is frail and weak.
15:03
O God of mercy hear our plea. When will you comfort our distress?
15:19
How long until the promised rest? We cry to you from deepest need.
15:31
O God of mercy hear our plea.
15:37
Abba Father our Redeemer.
15:44
In this barren land be our hope and strength.
15:50
Until glory we will trust and sing.
15:59
Abba Father hear our plea. We join creation's longing grove.
16:19
To take your ransomed children home. For then the eyes of all will see.
16:31
The God of mercy hears our plea.
16:37
Abba Father our Redeemer. In this barren land be our hope and strength.
16:49
Until glory we will trust and sing.
16:57
Abba Father hear our plea. For then the eyes of all will see.
17:17
The God of mercy hears our plea. Abba Father our
17:27
Redeemer. In this barren land be our hope and strength.
17:35
Until glory we will trust and sing.
17:42
Abba Father hear our plea. Abba Father our
17:51
Redeemer. In this barren land be our hope and strength.
18:01
Until glory we will trust and sing.
18:09
Abba Father hear our plea. Abba Father hear our plea.
18:23
For the first new song of this year we're going to sing, Thy Mercy. Thy mercy my
18:39
God is the theme of my song. The joy of my heart and the boast of my tongue.
18:47
Thy free grace alone from the first to the last Hath won my affections and bound my soul fast.
19:03
Without Thy sweet mercy I could not live here. Sin would reduce me to utter despair.
19:12
But through Thy free goodness my spirit's revived. And He that first made me still keeps me alive.
19:28
Mercy is more than a match for my heart. Which wonders to feel its own hardness depart.
19:37
Dissolved by Thy goodness I fall to the ground. And weep for the praise of the mercy
19:44
I found. Hallelujah.
20:00
Great Father of mercies, Thy goodness I own. And the covenant love of Thy crucified
20:08
Son. All praise to the Spirit whose working divine.
20:13
Seals mercy and pardon and righteousness mine. All praise to the
20:19
Spirit whose working divine. Seals mercy and pardon and righteousness mine.
20:30
Hallelujah. The most pressing announcement that I would have is regarding the annual business meeting coming up two weeks from today.
20:54
That is a potluck after our normal morning service. We turn this into a dining hall and we'll have a meal together and then a business meeting to follow that.
21:03
So please mark that on your calendar and plan to attend. And now will you please turn to the book of Genesis 2.
21:17
Genesis 2. I find it quite providential, as often happens, that our subject matter here in the book of Hebrews for the next few weeks is going to dovetail very well with the
21:34
Sunday school lessons that David Forsyth has been taking us through in adult Sunday school class. We're going to be talking today about marriage.
21:41
And so we're going back to the creation of man and woman and the institution of marriage in the
21:47
Garden of Eden. Genesis 2, and we're going to begin reading at verse 15. Then the
21:54
Lord God took the man and put him in the Garden of Eden to cultivate it and keep it.
22:00
The Lord God commanded the man, saying, From any tree of the garden you may eat freely, but from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil you shall not eat, for in the day that you eat from it you will surely die.
22:12
Then the Lord God said, It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make him a helper suitable for him.
22:18
Out of the ground the Lord God formed every beast of the field and every bird of the sky and brought them to the man to see what he would call them.
22:25
And whatever the man called a living creature, that was its name. The man gave names to all the cattle and to the birds of the sky and to every beast of the field.
22:34
But for Adam there was not found a helper suitable for him. So the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall upon the man, and he slept.
22:42
Then he took one of his ribs and closed up the flesh at that place. The Lord God fashioned into a woman the rib which he had taken from the man and brought her to the man.
22:52
The man said, This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh. She shall be called woman because she was taken out of man.
23:01
For this reason a man shall leave his father and his mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.
23:07
And the man and his wife were both naked and were not ashamed. You stand with me as we pray. Our Father, it is by your mercy and grace that we gather here together to worship you today.
23:24
It is because of what you have done in your Son to call us to yourself, to provide salvation, to atone for our sin, to give us a kingdom and bring us into fellowship with you through the work of the
23:37
Son on the cross and the wooing and drawing and regenerating work of your Spirit.
23:44
So we thank you for such mercy, and we have sung of your greatness. We've sung of your great mercy, your great goodness, your great love for us.
23:55
As our hearts and minds reflect upon that, we cannot be but overwhelmed by the goodness and grace of all the blessings you have lavished upon us.
24:03
We thank you that as we proclaim your goodness and reflect upon them, that you work in our hearts through your
24:09
Word to cause us to be conformed into the image of Christ. We pray that as we reflect upon your greatness and your glory and your majesty, that the beholding of your will and of your
24:23
Son in the pages of Scripture may serve to shape us into His image and sanctify us from one degree of glory to the next.
24:33
We would desire to be instruments and vessels through which you would manifest your grace and your goodness.
24:40
We pray that you would make us worshipers of our Triune God, that we would through the lifting of our voices and the affections of our hearts and our obedience to your
24:50
Word that we would honor and glorify you and fulfill the purpose for which you have saved us and called us into fellowship with yourself.
24:58
Be honored through this, we pray. We pray that you would work in us every grace and that your spirit would work in our hearts and in our minds and that even today you may in some measure and in some way conform us to the image of Christ.
25:12
Glorify yourself through this service, we pray, and help us to sing as those who have been freed from our sin, who love the
25:19
Lord Jesus Christ, and who have given our lives in service and obedience to Him. We pray that our voices may reflect the affections and the desires of our hearts and that you would be glorified through them in Christ's name.
25:30
Amen. We trust your promises that keep our hope alive
26:12
They steady us throughout life's weary climb
26:19
Where else can we go Where else can we go
26:26
You have the words of life The words of life
26:41
Come write your holy truth upon our longing hearts
26:50
And strengthen us to shine against the dark
26:56
Lord guard us from the lies The enemy will speak
27:04
No guilt remains for those you have redeemed
27:11
Where else can we go Where else can we go
27:18
You have the words of life The words of life
27:27
Make your glory known Make your glory known
27:34
Through all your words of life Your words of life
27:44
Give us ears to hear and eyes to see
27:53
Help us in our doubt and unbelief
28:00
Give us ears to hear and eyes to see
28:09
Help us in our doubt and unbelief
28:17
Give us ears to hear and eyes to see
28:25
Help us in our doubt and unbelief
28:34
Where else can we go Where else can we go
28:41
You have the words of life The words of life
28:51
Make your glory known Make your glory known
28:58
Through all your words of life Your words of life
29:06
Through all your words of life Your words of life
29:15
In Ephesians chapter 2 verses 1 to 5 it says
29:21
And you were dead in your transgressions and sins in which you formerly walked according to the course of this world according to the ruler of the power of the air the spirit that is now working in the sons of disobedience among whom we all also formerly conducted ourselves in the lusts of our flesh doing the desires of the flesh and of the mind and were by nature children of wrath even as the rest
29:46
But God being rich in mercy because of his great love with which he loved us even when we were dead in our transgressions made us alive together with Christ by grace you have been saved let's sing together
30:00
O great God O great
30:12
God of highest death occupy my lowly heart own it all and reign supreme conquer every rebel power let no vice or sin remain that resist your holy war you have loved and purchased me make me yours forever more
30:49
I was blinded by my sin had no ears to hear your voice did not know your love within had no taste for heaven's joys then your spirit gave me life opened up your word to me through the gospel of your son gave me endless hope and peace help me now to live a life that's dependent on your grace keep my heart and guard my soul from the evils that I face you are worthy to be praised with my every thought and deed
32:15
O great God of highest death glorify your name through me you are worthy to be praised with my every thought and deed
32:33
O great God of highest death glorify your name through me may be seated will you now please turn to Hebrews chapter 13
33:06
Hebrews chapter 13 we're going to begin reading at chapter 12 verse 28 we'll read through the end of verse 6 in chapter 13 beginning chapter 12 verse 28 therefore since we receive a kingdom which cannot be shaken let us show gratitude by which we may offer to God an acceptable service with reverence and awe for our
33:35
God is a consuming fire let love of the brethren continue do not neglect to show hospitality to strangers for by this some have entertained angels without knowing it remember the prisoners as though in prison with them and those who are ill treated since you yourselves also are in the body marriage is to be held in honor among all and the marriage bed is to be undefiled for fornicators and adulterers
34:01
God will judge make sure that your character is free from the love of money being content with what you have for he himself has said
34:09
I will never desert you nor will I ever forsake you so that we may confidently say the
34:14
Lord is my helper and will not be afraid what will man do to me let's bow our heads and ask
34:20
God's blessing on this time our Father our prayer is simple that you would help both hearer and speaker to clearly understand your word that you would use your word to to shape and to mold us our character, our behavior our lives and our thinking that you would subdue in us every rebel power and every sin that you would conform us to the image of Christ that you would be honored and glorified through our thoughts, our words and our deeds and we pray that that may happen here today as we meditate and think upon your word and the profound realities that it communicates to us regarding marriage and our responsibilities therein we pray this for the sake of Christ and for his glory, amen marriage is what brings us together today
35:17
I have always wanted to say that at the beginning of a wedding that I have officiated I've never had the courage to do it though I probably would have come closest at one of the weddings that I officiated for one of my children if I'm ever diagnosed with cancer and I know
35:31
I've got one wedding ceremony left to do and I'm given the opportunity to do it that's how I'm going to begin but I can say that today at the beginning of our service because that is the subject matter that we are dealing with here in Hebrews chapter 13 verse 4, marriage is to be held in honor among all and the marriage bed is to be undefiled for fornicators and adulterers
35:53
God will judge this is the next in a series of exhortations and applications that are found here in this 13th chapter of Hebrews as the author concludes this book he is concerned to press home to us some of the essential applications of biblical truth that he has spent 12 chapters unfolding for us it feels like 12 years but for them it was just 12 chapters this is part of running the race that is set before us we are exhorted and encouraged as kingdom citizens to fix our hope on the finish line and to run the race that is set before us so that we may receive the prize and this is what running the race looks like it looks like obeying these commands now there's just one sentence here on the subject of marriage in verse 4 and there's no detailed explanation there's no long exposition or theological treatment of the significance of marriage we have here just one command to honor marriage and to protect the marriage bed and at first glance it seems as if this exhortation is sort of out of place it's a little bit odd it doesn't seem like it belongs in the overall theology of the book of Hebrews we might expect a statement like this in the passage where Paul deals with the subject of marriage in Ephesians chapter 5 like we've been handling in adult
37:15
Sunday school class this last number of weeks Paul there gives a detailed explanation of the roles in marriage and the theological significance behind marriage or we might expect a statement like this to appear in 1
37:28
Peter chapter 3 where the apostle Peter deals with godly living in a hostile world and what that looks like even in the home and there he deals with the subject of believing women who have unbelieving husbands whom
37:42
Peter says are disobedient to the word and he talks there about the conduct for both men and women in fulfilling their roles in the relationship within the home but here is this command regarding marriage in a context where we do not readily expect it
37:57
Hebrews is a book that compares Jesus with all the functions and features of the Old Covenant it is a book intended to show that Jesus is greater than the angels he's greater than Moses he's greater than Aaron he is greater than the
38:11
Old Testament priesthood he's greater than all of the sacrifices in fact name your Old Testament hero
38:16
Jesus surpasses them all and not only that but his life is greater than all of their lives his sacrifice greater than all
38:24
Old Testament sacrifices his work and ministry greater than all Old Testament works and ministries it is intended to compare
38:32
Christ with all of those things Aaron Melchizedek their works their priesthood everything from the
38:39
Old Testament and the theme of all of the book of Hebrews is that Jesus is greater than all of them so where does where does marriage and moral purity and guarding the marriage bed where does that fit into the book of Hebrews for instance back in chapter 7 when we were looking at the passage that compares the
38:57
Melchizedekian priesthood with the priesthood of Jesus and the Aaronic priesthood we're looking at that passage and we saw how
39:03
Levi was in the loins of Abraham and Abraham paid tithes to Melchizedek and therefore
39:08
Levi was paying tithes to Melchizedek and therefore Melchizedek is greater than Levi and if Melchizedek is greater than Levi then the priesthood that Melchizedek had which is without beginning and without end is greater than the priesthood that Levi was given and therefore his sons and therefore
39:23
Aaron it's greater than all of that. How many of you when we went through chapter 7 were thinking to yourself I bet that there's a verse on the purity of the marriage bed and honoring marriage somewhere in this epistle just seems out of place doesn't it or when we're in chapter 8 and we're dealing with the
39:38
New Covenant and the glories of the New Covenant and how it surpasses the Old Covenant and we got that exposition of Jeremiah chapter 31 and the explanation of how the
39:47
Old Testament was nothing but shadows and symbols and the New Testament is the fulfillment of all of that and the Greater Covenant were any of you thinking to yourself this would be the perfect place to work in a verse on honoring marriage and the marriage bed any of you thought that some of you were thinking that was so long ago
40:02
I don't even remember what I was thinking back when we covered that or how many of you when we were in chapter 9 looking at the tabernacle and the furniture and the
40:10
Day of Atonement and the sprinkling of blood on the altar once a year behind the veil and comparing that to the work of Jesus in offering one sacrifice for sins and then forever sitting down at the right hand of the
40:20
Father how many of you thought to yourself I think that honoring the marriage and the marriage bed is the perfect application of this truth in fact if you go back and you listen to some of those messages you'll probably not hear me draw that application at all in any of that so what does marriage and honoring the marriage and the marriage bed have to do with the book of Hebrews let's consider it from a bit of a different angle consider this the glorious Messiah who was promised and pictured to the entire
40:50
Old Testament dispensation has now come to accomplish the ultimate work to redeem a people for his own possession he has offered one sacrifice for sin and has sat down at the
41:03
Father's right hand where he currently makes intercession for those whom the Father has given to him so that he might save them and secure them and sanctify them everlastingly and those people whom the
41:17
Father has given to him whom the Son has then redeemed and purchased by his own blood he has done this because they are his people and he even now makes intercession for them to apply the merits of his life and his sacrifice to their account so that there is no condemnation to those who are in him and they are promised only glory only joy only reward and he has made them his own and as his people we are called out of this world and into an eternal kingdom and he has given us this kingdom it is ours and even now he sits beyond the veil as it were in heaven praying for us encouraging us to run our race and then he does everything in his power to secure the finishing of that race on our behalf for us and he sustains us through that having purchased us he sustains us and keeps us and he has secured us and will bring us past that finish line to himself as his own people a blood bought and redeemed people zealous for good works that is what he has done now since he has done that how ought holy people to live well they should in verse 1 love one another they should in verse 2 love the stranger they should in verse 3 love the prisoner and they should in verse 4 love their spouse see it's it just seems natural now doesn't it how come
42:43
I never even saw this back in the first 12 chapters of the book this seemed like such a natural way of applying all of that biblical truth and here in this context what he is saying is that the salvation that is described in the first 12 chapters of this book will be seen in the lives and the behavior and the conduct of those who have been so purchased it will be seen the redemption will result in a certain kind of marriage this redemption will result in a pure and holy sexual ethic and if your
43:17
Christianity does not affect your marriage and your marriage bed you are living a lie that is the straightforward point you're living a lie you are at best a hypocrite that is the best thing you can say at worse you may in fact be a self -deceived apostate in the making if your
43:41
Christianity does not affect your marriage and your marriage bed you're either a hypocrite or you are a self -deceived apostate in the making you know what inevitably goes with apostasy nearly every time we see it sexual immorality so it seems quite reasonable that in the context of a book that is encouraging us to persevere in the faith that we would get some moral instruction regarding moral purity and honoring our marriage it is almost as certain as the wetness of water and almost without fail that when people walk away from the faith they depart from Christianity it is because they are enslaved to certain craven lusts and sexual desires almost 100 % of the time the apostate cannot square their lusts and their desires with the moral demands of the new covenant with the moral demands of the new testament and so first the apostate begins to make excuses for their sin then the apostate begins to redefine their sin and then finally the apostate just gives up all pretense and abandons any standard by which their sin might be called sin and by which they might be held to account and then they begin to just simply deconstruct their faith and they end up leaving the faith nearly 100 % of the time apostasy is motivated by sexual immorality and the desire to fulfill craven sexual lusts we've seen this within our own body even within the last year have we not and we should not forget that because it is a cautionary tale now
45:16
I say almost all the time and I don't say 100 % of the time because there may be some instance out there where somebody who's listening to me could point to where apostate was motivated by something other than their sexual immorality so there might be an example of that I have not seen an example of that if I ever see an example of that I will let you know but so far every example that I have seen of any kind of high profile apostasy or apostasy within a church body that I've been present in it is always accompanied by craven sexual desires and desires of immorality they either want what they cannot have or they want to affirm something that God condemns apostasy and sexual immorality go together like peanut butter and chocolate they are always there or should at least always be there but peanut butter and chocolate
46:00
I'm speaking of apostasy is motivated by sexual immorality this is why
46:06
Joshua Harris within a year after his public deconstruction and apostasy this is why
46:11
Joshua Harris within a year divorced his wife and was marching in a gay pride parade inside of Vancouver British Columbia it happens all the time so therefore in the context of a book that gives us encouragement to persevere in the faith we have this moral instruction in verse 4 just as false teachers follow their sensuality 2
46:35
Peter 2 verse 2 so the apostate remains a slave to sin listen to how Peter describes apostates and false teachers 2
46:42
Peter 2 verses 18 -20 for speaking out of arrogant words of vanity they entice by fleshly desires by sensuality those who barely escape from the ones who live in error promising them freedom while they themselves are slaves of corruption for by what a man is overcome by this he is enslaved for if after they have escaped the defilements of the world by the knowledge of the
47:04
Lord and Savior Jesus Christ they are again entangled in them and are overcome the last state has become worse for them than the first marriage is to be honored and the marriage bed is to be kept pure from defilement because of our covenant that we have made with our spouse and marriage is in this way a protection from sexual immorality and moral purity is itself a speed bump to our protection against apostasy because the one who has committed himself to honoring and living out a holy life in fidelity and faithfulness to their spouse with whom they are in covenant and keeping their marriage bed pure from all enemies foreign outside enemies and domestic the ones inside of our hearts when they're committed to guarding that that in itself is a guard against apostasy a prevention of apostasy so in this book we are talking about persevering in marriage and if you are going to address an apostate you might as well deal with the subject of marriage honoring marriage and being faithful inside of that marriage covenant so there are two things here that we are to honor in verse 4 for marriage and the marriage bed and the reason that these are to be honored both of them are to be honored is at the end of verse 4 for fornicators that is the immoral people and adulterers
48:17
God will judge and we should just let that hang there for as long as it needs to hang there fornicators and adulterers
48:24
God will judge and I believe that he's talking there of impenitent people who live and persist in this immorality demonstrate that they are enslaved to it and therefore become the subjects of God's judgment so let's now take apart this verse we are going to talk about first honoring marriage and then we will address honoring the marriage bed making no promises that we will get through both of those today but that's at least charting the course honoring marriage among all now just read with me again the beginning phrase of verse 4 marriage is to be held in honor among all there is an interpretive challenge that we run into at the beginning of verse 4 and I want you to be aware of it there is some question regarding the translation of the verse and different translations translate it differently there is no verb in the opening phrase and so the verb must be supplied by the translator and when the verb needs to be supplied by the translator to make the translation flow and have some sort of meaning it is subject to some interpretation as to whether what is being described as a command to be obeyed or a description that we are to observe that's the difference is the phrase in verse 4 meant to be taken as a prescription or a description is it a command or a statement of fact is it an exhortation or simply a declaration and so you see this difference of translation between the
49:48
King James for instance and the New American Standard the King James takes this as a statement of fact a simple description or declaration and the translators translated it this way marriage is honorable in all marriage is honorable in all notice that's just a statement of fact regarding the nature of marriage and the honor that it has marriage is honorable in all a statement describing the nature or the substance the quality of marriage now the
50:16
NASB and other modern translations translate it a little bit differently they translate it as a command a prescription an exhortation and so the
50:25
NASB translates it marriage is to be held in honor among all that describes a certain perspective on marriage that should inform our thinking it should inform our heart it is a perspective on marriage that requires us to do something namely to honor marriage so is it a description or is it a prescription now
50:45
I would submit to you that it cannot be a prescription unless it first is a description in other words marriage must be honorable if the author is telling us that we should honor it because God would never command us to honor something that is dishonorable or that is not honorable so if it is an exhortation that is a command for us to approach marriage and to handle our marriages in a certain way if it is an exhortation then it must also mean that marriage first and foremost is itself an honorable institution now
51:16
I take this as an exhortation a command and I'll give you a couple of reasons why first you'll notice that verse 4 is in a list of other commands let love of the brethren continue verse 1 love strangers verse 2 love prisoners verse 3 the second half of the phrase is also a command let the marriage bed remain undefiled or the marriage bed is to be undefiled so this is in a list of commands verse 5 says make sure your character is free from the love of money that's a command later down in verse 7 and 8 the passage that deals with submitting to authority that is a command and so we have this list of exhortations and commands in chapter 13
51:57
I think that chapter 13 verse 4 is to be taken as an exhortation a prescription something that we are to do because marriage is honorable we are therefore to honor marriage in our midst among us and honor our individual marriages the second reason
52:12
I take it as command is because the second half of the verse verse 4 is also a command that is we are to approach the marriage bed in a certain way namely to guard its purity and its sanctity and its holiness we are to maintain the purity and holiness of that aspect of our marriage and the third reason
52:31
I would take it as an exhortation is because the second phrase is really dependent upon the first if marriage is not honored then neither will be the marriage bed if marriage is not honored it's the top command if that is not honored then neither will be the marriage bed show me somebody who does not guard the purity of their own thought life and their own heart and their own marriage bed and I will show you somebody who does not honor marriage who does not have a high view of marriage these two things go together and the one who has a high view of the marriage covenant is going to expend every effort give all diligence to preserving and protecting that which you honor and love we always protect the things we love we always protect the things we honor and so if somebody does not protect the purity of their marriage bed they are not protecting their marriage these two things go hand in hand so he is not simply declaring something true about marriage he is exhorting us to honor it and to hold it in honor and that is the first step so we can take two points from this number one that we should honor marriage and second that we do this by maintaining the purity and sanctity of the marriage bed we honor marriage by maintaining purity and sanctity of the act within marriage that is authorized and created by God and I don't want you to miss what verse 5 says because there is a connection between verses 4 and 5 and before we go any further
54:02
I want you to see this connection look at verse 5 make sure that your character is free from the love of money being content with what you have for he himself has said
54:09
I will never desert you nor will I ever forsake you I want you to see a connection there in verse 4 he talks about sex in verse 5 he talks about money are these two related?
54:22
you know what the two greatest causes of conflict within a marriage are? sex and money do you know what couples fight about more than anything else?
54:32
sex and money do you know what reveals the condition of our hearts more than anything else? sex and money and do you know what two things have both not only been causes of great conflict but causes of untold harm and destruction?
54:48
sex and money these two things go together hand in hand they are both causes of untold harm and untold destruction in the lives of unbelievers in the lives of believers and in the lives of churches the amount of destruction that has been wrought because of lust and greed is incalculable it is indescribable you cannot even put a quantitative figure on it it's immeasurable it's everywhere lives have been ruined because of greed and covetousness and the love of money in fact 1st
55:25
Timothy chapter 6 verses 9 and 10 warns about this but those who want to get rich fall into temptation and a snare listen to this language into many foolish and harmful desires which plunge men into ruin and destruction for the love of money is a root of all sorts of evil and some by longing for it have wandered away from the faith what's that?
55:45
that's apostasy have wandered away from the faith and pierced themselves with many griefs the love of money itself is a cause of apostasy and then lust how much ruin and hurt and betrayal and destruction and devastation have been wrought in marriages in lives, in businesses in churches and in ministries because of sexual lust can you put a number on that?
56:12
we cannot the amount of destruction the number of tears that have been shed because of infidelity and pain and bitterness and destruction and betrayal and the hurt and the ruin would fill an ocean we can't quantify that these are the two most destructive things that we give places of idolatry and worship to in our hearts and they promise to do nothing but ruin us well that's not exactly true they promise to do all kinds of things for us that are all lies and what they end up doing is ruining us, that would be a better way to say it these sins stem from the same impulse according to Proverbs chapter 5 and Proverbs chapter 7 it is the fool who says in his heart though this has ruined countless other men
57:02
I can do this and remain untouched it is the fool who says in his heart
57:07
I can take coals into my lap and not be burned it's the fool who says in his heart this may have destroyed other marriages but it won't destroy mine this may have ruined other women but it won't ruin mine this may have turned other children against their fathers but it won't turn the hearts of my children against me so I can do this and I can get away with it
57:25
I can do this and I can keep it hidden I can do this and nobody will know every man who has fallen and been ruined by that has believed that lie at some point in their life these sins stem from the same impulse and you and I ought to notice what that impulse is and understand what that impulse is sexual impurity and covetousness both are a discontent with what
57:51
God has provided it's a discontent with what God has provided the man who seeks more material possessions, always something more always something extra always a little bit more it is a discontent with what
58:06
God has provided it looks in the face of what God has given and says I will not be satisfied with this
58:12
I must have more so I must work harder and I must get more the same is true with sexual immorality my wife or singleness, either one this is what
58:24
God has provided and I am discontent with this and therefore I will pursue satisfaction in some other way than through God's ordained means for me to be satisfied in this both of them come from a heart of covetousness, a heart that desires something illicit something that is not theirs and it really is an idolatry of the heart see it is the idol of of covetousness, it's greed that gets set up in the heart and then this idol demands that we sacrifice everything on that altar to serve that idol your children put it on the idol your clean conscience, put it on the idol, on the altar your purity, on the altar your relationship with the
59:08
Lord, on the altar your reputation, put it on the altar and it is a fool who is willing to take everything that God has given to them and lay it up on the altar in front of that idol and offer it in service to that idol the covetousness and the greed and the desire for something illicit that God has not provided, that is what motivates both the covetousness in verse 5 as well as the sexual immorality that is prohibited in verse 4 another thing that these two things both have in common is that obeying these commands in verse 4 and verse 5 are both expressions of my love for our neighbor how do
59:46
I love my wife? I love my wife by honoring my marriage and by honoring the marriage bed how do you love your husband?
59:54
you love your husband by honoring your marriage and by honoring the marriage bed how do
01:00:00
I love my neighbor? by not coveting their stuff and taking their stuff you see, both of these are expressions of what it means to love one another that is described in verse 1 now, let's talk about what marriage is before we talk about honoring it let's understand what it is and why it is what it is, so I want to begin with a definition you never used to have to do this by the way to define marriage, it was something that was patently obvious for all of human civilization for 6 ,000 years up until about 5 minutes ago and we decided that we were going to redefine marriage as a culture but we now have to define the obvious because we live in a world that is at war with reality, and so we have to define what reality is now marriage is intended by God to be between one man and one woman who become one flesh for one lifetime, get that phrase in your head one man and one woman who become one flesh for one lifetime that is
01:00:58
God's design John Owen describes marriage as this it is the lawful conjunction of one man and one woman by their just and full consent into an indissoluble union whereby they become one flesh for the procreation of children and mutual assistance in all things divine and human that is simply to say it is two people who enter into a covenant with one another by their just and full consent a union that normally results in the procreation of children, there are exceptions to that obviously, but it is a union that normally and most naturally results in the procreation of children it is a union that creates a oneness and a unity, a one fleshness, there is within marriage the mingling of souls between a man and a woman you don't remain two separate and independent souls any longer there is the union of souls in marriage, that union of souls takes place and is fed by and continues to express itself in the sexual act within marriage we're mingling souls in marriage and when you tear apart a marriage you are tearing apart something that has been brought together by God and there is an irreparable harm that is done when those two souls are ripped apart, because you are mingling souls, that's part of the covenant, and it is a union that is for the good of the man and for the good of the woman marriage is a certain thing and the government may want to pretend that it is something else, but it can never be anything other than what it is they can they can promote a mirage they can promote an illusion, they can promote a fable, a myth, a falsehood and call it marriage all day long but it is not they say that it is simply a legal agreement between any two parties, it could be two men, it could be two women, and we're not very far down the slippery slope yet from here before we're saying it's two men and two women, or nine men and three women or whatever we want to make it out to be they think it's something that our culture defines or the courts can redefine but we didn't create it, we didn't institute it mankind didn't come up with it it's something that God came up with which makes it honorable, and we live in a country that thinks they can redefine whatever they want man, women, truth, falsehood lies, the truth, etc morality, right, wrong they want to give different definitions to all of those things, and it's no surprise then that marriage would be offered up on the altar to the spirit of the age now this means to affirm anything other than what
01:03:36
I have just described regarding marriage, that it is the union of one man and one woman who become one flesh for one lifetime, to describe or affirm anything about marriage other than that is an act of blasphemy, and it's sinful so this means that to speak of a man and his husband is itself to speak of a man giving birth, it's like the same thing this does not exist a man and his husband a woman and her wife does not exist, there is no such thing this is nonsense it is as much nonsense as to speak of people changing genders that does not happen, you cannot change your gender why?
01:04:16
because your gender is written on every cell in your body and you cannot alter that you can change your perception of yourself you can change what you call yourself but you cannot change your gender your gender is established by God and written inside of your genetic code it is the same thing with marriage you can say a man married another man that doesn't make any sense it's incomprehensible, it's ridiculous and so to affirm that is itself to blaspheme marriage likewise to attend a same sex marriage is to dishonor marriage to celebrate a same sex marriage is to dishonor marriage to speak of my sister or my mother and her wife to describe that as if that has any legitimacy whatsoever is to dishonor marriage it is to speak something that is profane and blasphemous and it is therefore to profane and blaspheme a holy institution to celebrate it, to congratulate it to send a gift these things dishonor
01:05:15
God because they dishonor the institution of marriage so to view marriage or to describe marriage as anything other than one man and one woman becoming one flesh for one lifetime is itself to profane
01:05:27
God's good gift and to blaspheme the God who established that gift that was self -evident until five minutes ago in human history, that was self -evident now it needs to be said and to say it makes you a pariah probably make you a prisoner like we talked about last week to even utter these things now why is marriage honored and what makes it so honorable?
01:05:52
let me give you a couple of things that make marriage honorable since we're talking about the description of marriage it must be honorable if we're commanded to honor it why is it honorable?
01:06:01
it's honorable first and foremost because of its source, that God created it it is
01:06:06
His ordinance it was His idea and in fact it is an expression of His wisdom, He said it is not good for man to be alone and by the way it's not good for a woman to be alone either but He's the one who said this is what is good and so marriage therefore in the institution of it is an expression of God's wisdom and His love to provide what is good for His people, for His creation and since He created it,
01:06:30
He gets to ordain what it is, He brought the sexes together in the Garden of Eden Adam and Eve, a man and a woman and in His design
01:06:39
He defined what marriage is, Genesis 2 verse 24, for this reason a man, one man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife that is one woman, and they shall become one flesh, and Jesus and Moses revealed that that was intended to be a lifetime commitment now
01:06:57
Jesus by the way did not take a more progressive or liberal or libertine approach to the subject of marriage than you find in the
01:07:04
Old Testament He did not come onto the scene and say look I know you've heard that marriage is between a man and a woman but I say unto you
01:07:10
He just didn't say that at all He didn't redefine it, He didn't take a more liberal approach to it, because Jesus was an orthodox, theologically orthodox
01:07:19
Jew who affirmed at every turn what is said in the Old Testament regarding marriage, and every time
01:07:25
He quoted the Old Testament, whether it was the Law or the Psalms or the poetry section, every time
01:07:31
He quoted that, He affirmed the authority of it and the truthfulness of it so when Jesus comes onto the scene,
01:07:37
He doesn't give us anything different about marriage than what had been affirmed all the way through the Old Testament further, marriage was created for man in his innocence in his innocence, it was prior to the fall prior to sin, prior to the curse, that means that marriage was not given as something to overcome the curse, and not given as sort of a crutch to help men deal with the curse it was given to men in their innocence when they were holy and innocent and had not yet corrupted themselves so their minds were not corrupted, their hearts were not corrupted, they had no sinful inclinations, and it was in that context that marriage was given to them so that they might enjoy not only each other, but the pleasures and benefits that come with the marriage relationship and therefore marriage and the marriage bed are honorable and sanctified since they were created for man as a good gift to him in his state of innocence the second reason that it is honorable is because Jesus himself honored marriage, we already mentioned the connection in Genesis chapter 2 verse 24, but Jesus affirmed that teaching in Matthew chapter 19 when he says, from the beginning
01:08:47
God created the man and woman and said for this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and cleave to his wife and the two shall become one flesh and then
01:08:54
Jesus heightened the teaching on marriage by saying what God has brought together, let no man separate let no man divide that Jesus not only affirmed marriage there in Matthew chapter 19 oh, by the way let me answer an objection that is commonly raised regarding Jesus in this connection people will often say who are defending same sex relationships same sex attraction and same sex marriage, people will often say
01:09:21
Jesus didn't say anything about homosexuality is that a true statement or a false statement it's true in that he never used the word homosexual but it is false in that he never addressed it, because he did address it he did address it in Matthew chapter 19 by the way, when somebody says that to me
01:09:44
Jesus never said anything about homosexuality and a good rejoinder to say back to that is so you're telling me Jesus never had a good thing to say about homosexuality he did say something about it, in Matthew chapter 19 when he pointed back to the
01:09:56
Garden of Eden Genesis chapter 2, Jesus said this is what marriage is God has defined it this is the purpose of it, this is how sex is to be used and the context in which it is to be used and therefore anything outside of that is itself pornea, immorality and adultery so he did address it, he did speak of it because he described what
01:10:17
God's purpose is and therefore anything outside of that purpose is outside of the good purpose and plan of God second,
01:10:23
Jesus not only testified to the honoring of marriage in Matthew chapter 19 but Jesus honored marriage himself when he performed his first miracle at a wedding in Cana of Galilee in John chapter 2 the first place he did a miracle in John chapter 2 was in Cana at a wedding, and by turning water into wine he contributed to the joyful, jubilant celebration of that feast and of that marriage, and by making that the place where he would first reveal his miracle working power
01:10:52
Jesus authenticated that marriage and honored it, not only with his presence but also by making it the place of his first miracle and third marriage is honorable because it is a picture of the relationship that Christ has with his church marriage was created as a symbol a sign, a picture of something the drama of redemption is in view in the marriage covenant the man plays his part of Christ as he provides and protects for his bride and the woman plays the part of the church as she submits to the headship and leadership of her husband, and as she honors him and respects him and helps him both of them through that mutual act of others centered other focused laying down their lives for the sake of the other one, both of them in that act are acting out the drama of redemption, for in scripture the church is called the bride of Christ, Christ loved us,
01:11:54
Christ died for us he pledges himself to us and marriage is a picture of that redemption maybe you didn't know this when you signed up and said
01:12:04
I do, but when you said that you were agreeing to play your part to fulfill your role and to honor your vows and you weren't just simply saying
01:12:15
I'm entering into a legal contract that will make the distribution of our assets when we both die a little easier, you weren't simply agreeing to a cultural convention that makes life a little bit more convenient and gives you certain tax benefits, you weren't agreeing to that what you were doing was entering into a drama of redemption that there is one who has given his life for his bride the church and he calls us his bride and he woos us to himself he initiates that relationship he enters into that covenant and pledges himself to us his bride and the church is the recipient of that sacrificial laying down of myself no more of my interest no more selfishness the church submits to that and embraces that and benefits from that and so it is in the marriage relationship the man is called to lay down his life for his wife just as Christ did the church sacrifice but my needs irrelevant but my wants it's irrelevant it's not comfortable,
01:13:29
I don't care nobody cares it's not convenient, it's irrelevant none of it matters every excuse you can offer is irrelevant you can stand before the judgment seat of Christ and say well
01:13:42
I would have obeyed that but the woman that thou gavest me Lord not going to be able to say that all of that is irrelevant but he doesn't love me like he should it's irrelevant he doesn't care for me like Christ does the church so what?
01:13:57
none of that has any bearing upon this truth that your marriage is a stage upon which the glory of God in the gospel is to be played out in front of the watching world in front of every other couple in the church each sacrificing and giving to the other honoring the other and thus honoring the marriage covenant each one laying down their lives for the sake of the other putting aside their interests and considering the interests of others as more important than themselves seeking to benefit and bless the other partner above all things that is what the gospel is and when the world looks at Christian marriages and they see that on the world stage it says something it is the gospel being played out you're not just you're not just you do the dishes and I'll do the laundry or I'll take care of the car and you take care of the house it's not that how banal is that type of arrangement how simple how stupid, how worldly how empty is that but instead when
01:15:01
Christians say I'm going to honor my marriage because God has given me an opportunity to display the gospel to everybody who watches and so therefore as a man
01:15:10
I will lay down my life for my wife just as Christ did the church or as a woman because I am displaying the gospel
01:15:17
I am going to honor and respect and love and care for my husband just as the church honors and respects
01:15:23
Christ so I will do that with the goal being that we would display the glory of God in our relationships and in our marriages and in each of us fulfilling the roles that God has given to us the man is to pursue and I'm just speaking to men now because I am one, have been for quite a while the man is to pursue
01:15:42
Christ likeness in his marriage Christ likeness and men if you have no desire to be like Christ you have a serious problem
01:15:55
I would suspect that you're not even saved you have to look that deeply at your heart does it mean you have a passions, you're all consuming desire it's the only thing you think about 24 -7 no, none of us can do that but is that desire there are you seeking to be conformed into the image of Christ so that you may learn to treat your wife as Christ would treat your wife if he were married to her
01:16:22
John MacArthur said and I would affirm every syllable of this sentence that you can tell what a man thinks about Christ by how he treats his wife likewise
01:16:32
I think you can tell a lot about how a couple thinks about the gospel from how they treat one another the man who is verbally abusive and neglectful or harsh to his wife who thinks not of her, neglects her that is his view of what
01:16:48
Christ is like to his bride do you want to be like Christ marriage is honorable not just because of its source and not just because Christ's testimony not just because it is a picture of marriage or a picture of redemption but marriage is honorable because of its purpose the purpose of marriage is not just to make things more convenient it's not to give you a tax benefit it's not so you can split household duties or alleviate loneliness those things might happen as a result of marriage they often do but the purpose of marriage is to display the glory of God through a life that has lived in obedience to his commands it is to put on display the redemptive purpose of God in creation is your view of marriage that high?
01:17:35
if it's not you have an inadequate view of marriage so let's lift our eyes a little bit let's come to realize why it is that we are to hold marriage in honor it is the highest the greatest, the most profound and the most transcendent of all human relationships it is the highest and the best and the most glorious and the most profound and the most meaningful of any relationship that you can possibly have on this planet on this side of eternity you cannot have this kind of relationship with anybody else but your spouse only your spouse is the special object of this kind of affection and honor and only in this relationship do you get to enjoy the blessings that come with it it's a lifetime of work
01:18:27
I understand that but it is the most profound and transcendent reality that you and I get to touch this side of heaven and therefore when we do not honor it when we tarnish it and when we defame it we are dishonoring and tarnishing and defaming the most profound, the most transcendent the most glorious and the most honorable relationship that we could possibly ever have let us not do that now that is half of what
01:18:59
I had prepared and our time is gone and I told my wife before we started this I'm not sure that I'm going to get through all of this in one sermon
01:19:07
I still want to talk about how this verse answers a certain Roman Catholic perspective of forbidding marriage how this verse answers the
01:19:15
Gnostic perspective that all things physical are evil and how this verse answers the aesthetic perspective that we can, that well
01:19:24
I'll explain it next week and I want to talk about how it is that we honor marriage like how, what are the nuts and bolts of this this is what
01:19:31
God has called us to do what does this look like a lot of what I've talked about here is just it's 30 ,000 foot perspective on marriage in some respects now
01:19:41
I want to talk about the meat and potatoes of that and we'll save that for next time and that's how we land this plane, so let's bow our heads and let's have a time of confession and prayer together
01:19:55
Father it is a great and glorious blessing that you have bestowed upon your people and upon your entire creation that we could enter into the mingling of souls in a marriage relationship a mingling of souls that is so profound so glorious, so beautiful as to call forth our highest praise you have demonstrated your goodness to us in giving this gift to us and we have demonstrated in return our propensity to sin and to fall short by not honoring this gift as we should and so we confess that to you and pray that you would strengthen us to have a high view of marriage that some of the things that we have considered here and learned today may lift our hearts and our minds and our eyes off of the here and now that you would mortify in our hearts our sinfulness and our selfishness which itself undermines every relationship that we have particularly marriage that you would give us the grace to set aside our own interests and to pursue the interest of others to hold this institution in high honor is one thing and to hold the institution of our marriage our individual marriages in high honor is a little bit more difficult considerably more difficult and so we pray that you would encourage our hearts by your truth and strengthen us to do this we turn from our sin we confess to you our failings and we find in the gospel the solace for our souls we thank you that Christ has lived in our stead and died in our place so that we might be counted as righteous and we thank you that you are working by your word and by the power of your spirit righteousness and holiness in our lives without holiness we will never see you so we pray that you would conform us to the image of Christ and make us a holy people turn us from our sin fix our eyes on Christ comfort and encourage our hearts together strengthen our marriage as we pray in the name and for the sake of Christ our
01:22:11
Lord, Amen would you please stand and since the song we sung earlier today was more unfamiliar to most we're going to sing it again as our closing song so Thy Mercy Thy mercy my
01:22:36
God is the theme of my song the joy of my heart and the boast of my tongue thy free grace alone from the first to the last hath won my affections and found my soul found without thy sweet mercy
01:23:01
I could not live here sin would reduce me to utter despair but through thy free goodness my spirit's revived and he that first made me still keeps me alive thy mercy is more than a match for my heart which wonders to feel its own hardness depart he's all by thy goodness
01:23:34
I fall to the ground and weep for the praise of the mercy
01:23:40
I found hallelujah great father of mercies thy goodness
01:23:59
I own and the covenant love of thy crucified son all praise to the spirit whose working divine seals mercy and pardon and righteousness mine all praise to the spirit whose working divine seals mercy and pardon and righteousness mine hallelujah for I am convinced that neither death nor life nor angels nor rulers nor things present nor things to come nor powers nor height nor depth nor any other created thing will be able to separate us from the love of God which is in Christ Jesus our