TLP 128: The Four Family Loves, Part 1 | it’s something we have to do

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How can God command us to love? Who are we supposed to love?

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Well, grab your family and join me as we attempt to answer these questions and more from God's Word. Welcome to Truth.

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Love. Parent. Where we use God's Word to become intentional, premeditated parents.

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Here's your host, A .M. Brewster. I am overjoyed and thrilled to announce that Truth.

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Love. Parent is now number one in iTunes for Christian parents. Isn't that awesome? Well, thank you everyone for subscribing and rating and reviewing and sharing.

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We definitely couldn't have done it without you. And today we start a study that I hope will be so helpful that it will be shared far and wide because we all need this.

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Welcome to part one of the four family loves. To be completely honest, though, we're not just talking about family love.

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This love is for everyone. We're commanded to show this love to people we don't even know.

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That's why the subtitle to today's show is, It's Something We Have to Do. Now, in our culture, the whole idea of love is totally messed up.

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Not only is love incorrectly attached to ideas of affection and romance, not only do we have two gigantic and irreconcilable philosophies of love, but despite all of that, we also frequently reduce the concept of love to hardly anything at all.

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My friend Mark Massey says, I love pizza, but unfortunately it doesn't end very well for the pizza.

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We toss around the word love like it doesn't mean anything, and most of the time it doesn't. But we serve a

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God who is decent and orderly. We serve a God who doesn't change. We serve a God who has clearly communicated everything we need to know about a concept

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He created. In fact, He didn't just create love. God is love.

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Who better to inform our family's understanding of love than God Himself? Now before we continue,

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I want to invite you to share this episode not only with your friends, but with your family. This is one of those episodes that will be super helpful for the whole family to hear.

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Obviously you can internalize and digest this information and then share it with your children, but I believe you'll find these truths from Scripture to be so powerful and efficacious that you'll want to share it with them as soon as possible.

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And since we'll be studying this topic for the next two and a half weeks, it will give you prepackaged opportunities for the next half a month to schedule a time for your family to come together and study

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God's Word. So assuming the fam is all there, let me explain a few things that will help this process be the most productive it can for everyone.

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Number one, most of the time I'll just be speaking to everyone, and sometimes I'll speak directly to the individual family members.

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Number two, once each episode is over, you all should take some time to discuss your thoughts about the topic there with your family.

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Talk about how the Scripture affected you. Talk about how these ideas can practically be put into practice in your family tonight.

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And three, to that end, it would be a great idea if everyone in the family with the ability to write took notes.

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You can even make it a special thing and get some small notebooks just for this study. Or you can get a larger notebook for everyone and make it a habit to take notes every time your family comes together to worship

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God by learning from His Word. Alright, so let's start this amazing study of biblical love by realizing that we don't really have a choice when it comes to what love is and whom we're to love.

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Now I know that sounds super un -American for those of you who live in the United States. How many movies have been made and how many songs have been sung that tell us that love is something you fall into?

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It's something that happens to you, not something you choose to do. Well, instead of discussing all the silly failure philosophies our culture has dreamed up concerning love, let's figure out what

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God has to say. So number one, we need to realize that God commands us to love.

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It's something we have to do, and He tells us exactly whom we're supposed to love. Generally speaking, 1

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Corinthians 16, 13 -14 spells it out very simply. It says, be watchful, stand firm in the faith, act like men, be strong, let all that you do be done in love.

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Well, under the gigantic umbrella of loving God in all we do, we're going to see that there are at least three groups that we're to love.

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So we're going to discuss those three groups, but first I think some of us need to answer the question, how can

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God command us to love? Seriously, how can God expect you to love another person, especially if you don't love that person to begin with?

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Well, here are four solid reasons it makes perfect sense for God to command us to love. Number one,

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God could command us to love because of the nature of love. I'm not going to talk about this too much in detail right now.

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We need to take the next two weeks just to scratch the surface of truly understanding the nature of biblical love. But I will say this,

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God created love. He created humans to love. God knows how it's supposed to work. If you're feeling like it's weird or impossible to command someone to love someone else, please understand that it probably means that you just really don't know what love is.

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And that's okay. That's why we're here. At one point or another in all of our lives, we've been confused about love.

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It's possible even mom and dad right now don't have a biblical understanding of love. So, for now, please accept that God can command us to love each other simply because He knows that's how it's supposed to work.

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Number two, God can command us to love because He is love. This point ties into the first in that one of the biggest characteristics of love is that God Himself is love.

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First John 4 .8 says, "...anyone who does not love does not know God, because God is love."

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Now, the passage doesn't give us too much clarification about the implications of this claim. We all accept that God is holy, and that doesn't mess with our heads because the word holy is a predicate adjective.

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It's being used to describe who God is. But we don't use the word love as an adjective. For us, it's a noun or a verb.

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Other than saying, God is God, this is one of the only descriptions of God in the English language that uses a predicate nominative.

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We're okay saying that God is God because that sums up the totality of all that He is. That's why saying that God is love sounds strange in our ears because we think of love as part of God, not all that He is.

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And that's why a better understanding of love will make it easier for us to love others. Also, because God is love,

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He can give us everything we need to do it well. And that leads us to the third point. God can command us to love because He is powerful.

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It's one thing for me to say, go build a skyscraper. Sure, I can say the words, I can command you to do it, but I can't help you be successful in doing it.

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But God is powerful enough to make us successful. Job 42 too says,

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I know that you can do all things, and that no purpose of yours can be thwarted. And that's why

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Paul can say in Philippians 4 .13, I can do all things through Him who strengthens me. A good example of this is

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Romans 5, 3 -5. We rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope.

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And hope does not put us to shame because God's love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us.

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Do you see how it's possible for endurance and character and hope that they can all grow in us through our sufferings?

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Well, it's only truly possible by God's love that has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit. God knows everything about love.

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He knows everything about the person He wants you to love. He's given you everything that you need to know about love, and He wants to give you the spiritual ability to love.

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And that leads to number four. Number four, God can command us to love because we're forgiven, or at least we should be.

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Listen carefully to Luke 7, 41 -50. A certain moneylender had two debtors.

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One owed five hundred denarii, and the other fifty. When they could not pay, he canceled the debt of both.

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Now which of them will love him more? Simon answered, the one, I suppose, for whom he canceled the larger debt.

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And Jesus said to him, You have judged rightly. Then turning toward the woman, the woman who has been there and has been washing his feet, he said to Simon, Do you see this woman?

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I entered your house, you gave me no water for my feet, but she has wet my feet with her tears and wiped them with her hair.

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You gave me no kiss, but from the time I came in, she has not ceased to kiss my feet. You did not anoint my head with oil, but she has anointed my feet with ointment.

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Therefore I tell you, her sins, which are many, are forgiven, for she loved much.

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But he who is forgiven little, loves little. And he said to her, Your sins are forgiven.

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Then those who were at the table with him began to say among themselves, Who is this who even forgives sins?

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And he said to the woman, Your faith has saved you. Go in peace. Those who have submitted to Christ and are following Him find it easier to love than those who reject

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His love. Those of us who understand the disgusting nature of our sin and rejoice in the forgiveness of God can't help but want to show the same love to others.

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Luke 16, 13 says, No servant can serve two masters, for either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will be devoted to the one and despise the other.

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You cannot serve God in money. I mention this as an example of the fact that we will naturally love whatever we value.

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If we value God for His awesomeness, we will find it easy to love. Jesus also said in John 8, 42,

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Jesus said to them, If God were your Father, you would love me, for I came from God, and I am here.

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Again, God can command us to love because He knows that being born again will make it possible for us to love. But before we go on,

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I have to mention that a person who doesn't have a relationship with God, a person who isn't born again, cannot truly love.

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Following Christ is the first and necessary step to fulfilling the command to love. Romans 8, 7 -8 says,

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For the mind that is set on the flesh is hostile to God, for it does not submit to God's law. Indeed, it cannot.

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Those who are in the flesh cannot please God. No one who lives according to the flesh, that is, an unbeliever, can do anything that pleases

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God, including genuinely loving people. And on the flip side of this truth, not being able to truly love people is an evidence of not being born again.

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First John 4, 7 says, Beloved, let us love one another, for love is from God, and whoever loves has been born of God and knows

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God. And as we saw earlier, the very next verse tells us, Anyone who does not love does not know

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God, because God is love. If you're even partially uncertain whether you're a born -again

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Christian, I would love to take the time right now to show you how you can become a true follower of Christ. But we still have a lot of material to cover, and I've already shared a number of resources on this podcast to help answer that question, so I strongly encourage you to check those out.

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So now, we need to understand that God can command us to love because of the very nature of love, because He is love, because He's powerful enough to do it, and because everyone who's been born again should naturally desire to show love to all people.

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With that foundation laid, we can now look at the three groups of people God commands us to love. Number one.

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The first group really isn't a group, as some of you can probably guess. The first person we're commanded to love is

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God Himself. Matthew 22, 37 -38 tells us, And Jesus said to him, You shall love the

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Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your mind. This is the great and first commandment.

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The following verses also command us to love God, or assume that we should. Psalm 31, 23,

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Psalm 91, 14 -15, Proverbs 8, 17, Mark 12, 28 -30,

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John 14, 23, and John 16, 27. Now, again, for the sake of time, I can't develop any of those passages or any of what follows with the kind of detail

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I'd like, but what I will do is this. I'm going to include all of this in our show notes. By the way, these notes may be a wonderful way to deepen your family's time with God as you study this out.

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You can find our episode notes at TruthLoveParent .com, we post them in our blog called, Taking Back the

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Family. Today's notes are going to be filled with tons of scriptures, so you can study each of these points for yourself. And just think, all of the scriptures

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I'm about to share are only the tip of the iceberg when it comes to this topic. All right, so how do we know if we're loving

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God the way we should? 1. Our love for God is shown by our implicit trust in the

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Lord. 1 Thessalonians 5, 8 gives us a glimpse into the relationship between faith and love.

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2. Our love for God is shown by our devotion to the person of Christ. Please read

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Matthew 10, 37 and John 14, 21. 3. Our love for God is shown by our hatred of evil.

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Psalm 97, 10, Psalm 119, 104 and 1 Corinthians 13, 6 all teach us this truth.

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4. Our love for God is shown by our gratitude for God's blessings. You can read

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Psalm 116, 1, Psalm 116, 17 and 1 John 4, 19 for instruction.

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5. Our love for God is shown by our love for God's Word. I love that the longest chapter in the entire

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Bible is all about the Bible. It would do you well to read the entire chapter, but Psalm 119, 47 -48 illustrate this truth well.

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6. Our love for God is shown by the amount of time spent in prayer and fellowship with the

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Lord. Colossians 3, 1 -3 and Thessalonians 5, 17 teach us about this, and so does the example of our

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Lord. All throughout the Gospels, we see how Jesus took deliberate time to commune with His Father. 7.

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Our love for God is shown by our desire to vindicate the Lord before the world. Please read

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Psalm 511 and Psalm 115, 1. 8. Our love for God is shown by our obedience to God's Word.

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1 John 5, 3 and 2 John 6 are both powerful testaments to this. 9.

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Our love for God is shown by our desire to become like the Lord. 1 John 3, 2 -3 says,

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Beloved, we are God's children now, and what we will be has not yet appeared, but we know that when He appears, we shall be like Him, because we shall see

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Him as He is. And everyone who thus hopes in Him purifies himself as he is pure.

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10. Our love for God is shown by our love and respect for other Christians. For further reading, please check out

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Ephesians 4 .32 and 1 John 4 .20. 11. Our love for God is shown by our effort to reach the lost with the gospel.

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2 Corinthians 5, 11 -16 is a powerful passage that starts, Therefore, knowing the fear of the

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Lord, we persuade others. 12. Lastly, our love for God is shown by our longing for Christ's return.

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2 Timothy 4, 8 sums up the heart of the believer when it refers to us as those who love

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His appearing. If it weren't clear before, hopefully now you understand how important it is for us to love

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God and see the significant change it will have in our lives when we do. Imagine a household filled with people whose lives were defined by that list.

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Wow. Now, on to the second group of people we're to love. 2. God commands us to love our neighbors.

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Matthew 22, 39 -40 says, And the second commandment is like the first, You shall love your neighbor as yourself.

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On these two commandments depend all the law and the prophets. If we love God, this group of people will be easy to love.

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And by implication, if we don't love this group of people, we don't love God. But who is our neighbor?

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A man once asked Jesus the exact same question. In Luke 10, 25 -37, Jesus answers his question by telling a parable that we refer to as the

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Good Samaritan. I encourage you to read the whole thing, but I will sum it up for you. Everyone is your neighbor.

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It's not just the people who live around you or go to your church or school or work where you work. It's everyone.

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So, if I don't consistently love my neighbor, I don't love God. Well, I'll let God answer that from 1

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John 4, 20. If anyone says, I love God, and hates his brother, he is a liar.

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For he who does not love his brother whom he has seen cannot love God whom he has not seen.

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That makes it pretty clear. We can't call ourselves Christians. We can't call ourselves followers of Christ if we don't love our neighbors.

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John 13, 34 -35 gives us the positive side of this commandment. A new commandment

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I give to you, that you love one another, just as I have loved you. You also are to love one another.

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By this all people will know that you are my disciples, if you have love one for another. It's our

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Christlike love for others that will be the main thing that proves we're children of God. And that makes a lot of sense.

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If God is love, then his children would have to be of love and therefore loving. Romans 12, 9 -10 also tells us to let love be genuine, abhor what is evil, hold fast to what is good, love one another with brotherly affection, outdo one another in showing honor.

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I quote that verse quite a bit in my house. That's a great one to add to your parenting Bible. And Romans 13, 8 -10 says,

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Owe no one anything, except to love each other. For the one who loves another has fulfilled the law.

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For the commandments, you shall not commit adultery, you shall not murder, you shall not steal, you shall not covet, and any other commandment are summed up in this word, you shall love your neighbor as yourself.

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Love does no wrong to a neighbor, therefore love is the fulfilling of the law. My friends, moms, dads, brothers, sisters,

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God commands you to love him. God commands you to love your neighbors. But you may be thinking, what if a person is really mean to me?

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What if they hate me? What if they want to kill me? Do I still have to love them? They're not my neighbor, right?

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Well, that leads us to the last group of people we're to love. And this flows really well from the parable of the Good Samaritan.

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Number three, God commands us to love our enemies. In Jesus' most famous servant, in Matthew 5, 43 -48,

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Jesus says, You have heard that it was said, you shall love your neighbor and hate your enemy. But I say to you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, so that you may be sons of your

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Father who is in heaven. For he makes his Son rise on the evil and on the good and sends rain on the just and the unjust.

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For if you love those who love you, what reward do you have? Do not even tax collectors do the same? And if you greet only your brothers, what more are you doing than others?

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Don't even the Gentiles do the same? You therefore must be perfect, as your heavenly Father is perfect.

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In Luke 6, 27 -36, Jesus also says, But I say to you who hear, love your enemies.

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Do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who abuse you.

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To one who strikes you on the cheek, offer the other also. And from one who takes away your cloak, do not withhold your tunic either.

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Give to everyone who begs from you. And from one who takes away your goods, do not demand them back.

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And as you wish that others would do to you, do so to them. If you love those who love you, what benefit is that to you?

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For even sinners love those who love them. And if you do good to those who do good to you, what benefit is that to you?

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For even sinners do the same. And if you lend to those from whom you expect to receive, what credit is that to you?

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Even sinners lend to sinners to get back the same amount. But love your enemies, and do good, and lend, expecting nothing in return, and your reward will be great, and you will be sons of the

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Most High. For He is kind to the ungrateful and the evil. Be merciful, even as your

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Father is merciful. Wow. That is the perfect example for us.

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Jesus did exactly what He commanded us to do. He asked God the Father to forgive the people who had just beat

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Him and nailed Him to the cross. And as amazing as that was, that wasn't even the most loving thing

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Jesus did for His enemies. The most amazing thing He did for the worst enemy He had was to die on the cross in the first place.

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And you know who His worst enemy is? All mankind. You, your other family members, and me.

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Unsaved humanity is God's greatest enemy, and yet He had a plan from day one to sacrifice Himself for us.

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1 John 4 .19 tells us we love because He first loved us. 1 John 4 .10

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tells us, in this is love. Not that we have loved God, but that He loved us and sent

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His Son to be the propitiation for our sins. Ephesians 2 .4 -5 says,

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Even though Romans 8 tells us that unbelievers are enemies of God, they're hostile to God, God still loves them and died to provide a way for them to have a relationship with Him.

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How on earth could we ever try to justify not loving someone? So, family, look around you.

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You see those people sitting around you? God commands you to love them. You must love them. You cannot excuse your hatred for them.

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You can't justify your unkindness. You can't smooth over your mean words, disobedience, or other hateful behavior.

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If you're confused about what I mean about other hateful behavior, feel free to listen to the two episodes before this one.

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All right, so we've come to understand that God commands us to love. He has all the right in the world to do so because He perfectly understands the nature of love.

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He is love. He's powerful enough to do it, and He knows that all believers will want to do it. So He commands us to love

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Him, our neighbors, and even our enemies. But what is love?

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Have you noticed that we haven't really answered that question yet? Well, that's what we'll be discussing for the next four episodes, where we'll look at four types of family love, discuss the pros and the cons, learn how to love, and receive practical advice for putting that love to use in our families.

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I hope all of you are as excited as I am. And if you know anyone else who can benefit from this study, share this episode with them.

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And let me help you out just a bit. Everyone needs this truth. And don't forget about the very full and totally robust episode notes we have for you today.

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You can click on the link below to be taken right to them. And on our next episode, we're going to discuss a fake family love.

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It's called, A Love That Takes. And please don't forget that Truth Loved Parent is a listener -supported ministry.

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If you benefited from this episode or any of our other episodes, will you please consider saying thank you with a monetary gift.

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Everyone on Team TLP is a volunteer, and we do this because we love God and your family. So if you'd like to offer encouragement and support for TLP, please click on the 5

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Ways to Support TLP link below. And just in case you don't know, we offer another free service to everyone who listens to this show.

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Anyone and everyone can send an email to Counselor at TruthLoveParent .com and receive the best answers

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God's Word has to give. We love because God first loved us. What better reason is there to love your family?

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See you next time. Truth. Love. Parent. Is part of the

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Evermind Ministries family and is dedicated to helping you become an intentional premeditated parent.

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Join us next time as we search God's Word for the truth your family needs today.