WWUTT 1518 Each Has His Own Gift From God (1 Corinthians 7:6-7)

Marriage, Sexual Intimacy, and Self-Control in 1 Corinthians 7

Regarding marriage, there were certain things that the Apostle Paul said, not as a command, not as a command from God, but as a concession to be received as wisdom. And we receive this wisdom from God when we understand the text.

This is When We Understand The Text, a daily study in the word of Christ, for the sake of the faith of God's elect and their knowledge of the truth, which accords with godliness. Find all our videos and other ministry resources at www .utt .com.

Here once again is Pastor Gabe.

Thank you, Becky. We come back to our study of 1 Corinthians chapter 7, where we're talking about marriage and sex within marriage. So just to make you aware, that's the subject matter Paul has been addressing with this church.

We'll begin by reading verses 1 through 9 out of the Legacy Standard Bible the Apostle Paul wrote to the church in Corinth. Now concerning the things about which you wrote, it is good for a man not to touch a woman, but because of sexual immoralities, each man is to have his own wife, and each woman is to have her own husband.

The husband must fulfill his duty to his wife, and likewise also the wife to her husband. The wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does, and likewise also the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does.

Stop depriving one another, except by agreement for a time, so that you may devote yourselves to prayer, and come together again, so that Satan will not tempt you because of your lack of self-control.

But this I say as a concession, not as a command. Yet I wish that all men were even as I myself am. However, each man has his own gift from God, one this way and another that. But I say to the unmarried and to the widows, that it is good for them if they remain even as I.

But if they do not have self-control, let them marry. For it is better to marry than to burn with passion. I wanted to come back to a couple of references that I made yesterday and clarify some things.

First of all, concerning my reference to Leviticus 15, we went there and looked at the laws about bodily discharges and cleanliness that are given there in Leviticus 15. I didn't sufficiently wrap that up, that this is not a law we're supposed to follow now.

These were types and shadows concerning the kind of cleanliness we are to have before God and pointing to Christ who cleanses us, who purifies us and makes us new. I did say that. I didn't really tie all of that together in that way.

So don't read Leviticus 15 as a cleanliness code that you have to follow in the present day that has been fulfilled in Christ. Though again, there's probably some good wisdom there that you could follow concerning cleanliness.

Second reference had to do with something we read here in verse 5. So coming back to 1 Corinthians 7, 5 again, stop depriving one another, Paul says, except by agreement for a time. So that you may devote yourselves to prayer and come together again so that Satan will not tempt you because of your lack of self-control.

And I asked this question, what might be a reason that a husband and a wife would have to separate for a time and not have sex for a time? I was going to say not sleep together, but they're still going to be sleeping together, probably during this time.

The only example that I gave was concerning a woman's period. So when she's on her time of the month, the husband and the wife are not having sex. They must devote themselves to prayer and then come back together.

That was the only example that I gave. I did not mean to imply that that's the only example Paul is referring to. There are many other things to which that instruction could apply. When I was a pastor at a church that was very military, we would have a lot of husbands that would deploy and they would be gone for nine months at a time.

So there were times there for nearly a year that a husband would have to devote himself to the word of God and prayer so he would not be tempted by his flesh. And then coming back from his overseas duty, then he would fulfill his duty to his wife and she would fulfill her duty to her husband.

There might be a medical procedure or something like that that's happened or somebody is sick or something to that effect. Whatever reason it might be that is preventing the husband and wife from being intimate with each other, they should agree on separation.

Good communication between each other. I did emphasize that yesterday. So a husband and a wife need to communicate with one another. They agree on a time to be separated. They devote themselves to prayer so that they will not be tempted in their flesh.

We all need to do this anyway. But a husband and a wife especially, they know what they're missing. And so they devote themselves to God and to prayer and then come back together so that Satan will not use that as an opportunity to get them to fall into sexual immorality.

I said this when we were back in chapter six, but sexual immorality is not something to flirt with. It's not something to think, well, I can cross this line. I'll just ask God's forgiveness and it's fine.

You know, what am I what am I really doing wrong here, especially if I'm just doing something that pleases myself and I'm not really doing something with another person? Paul says, flee sexual immorality.

That every other sin a man commits is outside his body, but the sexually immoral man sins against his own body. Or do you not know that your body is a sanctuary of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have from God and that you are not your own for you were bought with a price?

Therefore glorify God in your body. That's the approach we need to take. And the purity that we have comes not from ourselves. It's not from what we do or what we don't do. It comes from Christ. By faith in Christ, he has cleansed us from all unrighteousness and clothed us in his righteousness that we may be holy and blameless before him, walking in holiness and blamelessness.

Marriage as a Creation Ordinance and the Gift of Continency

Concerning this section that we've read this week out of First Corinthians chapter seven, verses one through five, I wanted to read something to you here. This is from William Perkins. He was a 16th century Cambridge theologian and one of the most influential leaders in the Puritan movement.

He died young. He was only about 43 or 44 years old, but wrote some great stuff. And this excerpt that I'm going to read to you here is from a short survey of the right manner of erecting and ordering a family, according to the scriptures.

Marriage is the lawful conjunction of the two married persons, that is of one man and one woman into one flesh. So was the first institution of marriage, which is expounded by our Savior Christ in Matthew 19.

Therefore, they are no more two, but one flesh and also Paul in Ephesians five. For this cause shall a man leave his father and his mother and cleave unto his wife as two boards are joined together with glue and they which were two shall be one flesh.

Wherefore, this is an eternal law of marriage that two and not three or four shall be one flesh. Marriage of itself is a thing indifferent and the kingdom of God stands no more in it than in meats and drinks.

And yet it is a state in itself far more excellent than the condition of single life. For first, it was ordained by God in paradise above and before all other states of life in Adam's innocency before the fall.

Again, it was instituted upon a most serious and solemn consultation among the three persons in the Holy Trinity. Genesis 1 26, let us make man in our image according to our likeness and let them rule over.

Genesis 2 18, Jehovah Elohim said, it is not good that the man should be himself alone. I will make him a help meat. Thirdly, the manner of this conjunction was excellent for God joined our first parents, Adam and Eve together immediately.

Fourthly, God gave a large blessing unto the estate of marriage saying increase and multiply and fill the earth. Lastly, marriage was made and appointed by God himself to be the fountain and seminary of all other sorts and kinds of life in the commonwealth and in the church.

Now, if mankind had continued in that uprightness and integrity, which it had by creation, the state of single life had been of no price and estimation among men. Neither should it have had any place in the world without great contempt of God's ordinance and blessing.

Nevertheless, since the fall to some men who have the gift of continency, it is in many respects far better than marriage, yet not simply, but only by accident in regard of sundry calamities, which came into the world by sin.

For first, it frees a man from many and great cares of household affairs. Again, it makes him much more fit and disposed to mediate of heavenly things without distraction of mind. Besides that, when dangers are either present or imminent in matters belonging to this life, the single person is in this case happy because he and his are more secure and safe than others who are in married state.

1 Corinthians 7, 8,. Therefore I say to the unmarried and widows, it is good for them if they abide even as I do. I suppose, then, this to be good for the present necessity. I mean that it is good for a man so to be.

But if thou takest a wife, thou sinnest not, and if a virgin marry, she sinneth not. Nevertheless, such shall have trouble in the flesh, and I would have you without care. The end of marriage is fourfold.

And now William Perkins goes on to explain these fourfold ends of marriage. The first end. The first is procreation of children. For the propagation and continuance of the seed and posterity of man upon the earth.

Genesis 1, 28,. Bring forth fruit, multiply, fill the earth, and subdue it. The second end. The second is the procreation of a holy seed, whereby the church of God may be kept holy and chaste, and there may always be a holy company of men, that may worship and serve God in the church from age to age.

Malachi 2, 15,. And did not he make them one? Yet had he abundance of spirit, and wherefore one, because he sought a godly seed. The third end. The third is that after the fall of mankind, it might be a sovereign means to avoid fornication and consequently to subdue and slake the burning lusts of the flesh.

1 Corinthians 7, 2. Nevertheless, for the avoiding of fornication, let every man have his wife, and every woman have her husband. Verse 9,. But if they cannot abstain, let them marry, for it is better to marry than to burn.

And for this cause some schoolmen do err, who hold that the secret coming together of man and wife cannot be without sin, unless it be done for procreation of children. Lombard said the contrary, namely, that marriage before the fall was only a duty, but now since the fall it is also a remedy.

The fourth end. The fourth end is that the parties married may thereby perform the duties of their callings in better and more comfortable manner. Proverbs 31, 11. The heart of her husband trusteth her, and he shall have no need of spoil.

She seeketh wool and flax, and laboreth cheerfully with her hands. That was verse 13 of Proverbs 31. Perkins goes on. Marriage is free to all orders, and sorts of men without exception, even to those that have the gift of continency.

But for them which cannot abstain, it is by the express commandment of God necessary. Hebrews 13, 4. Marriage is honorable amongst all men, and the bed undefiled. 1 Corinthians 7, 9. But if they cannot abstain, let them marry.

By which it appears to be a clear case that the commandment of the Pope in Rome, whereby he forbids marriage of certain persons, as namely of clergymen, is merely diabolical. For so writes the apostle, 1 Timothy 4, 1.

The spirit speaketh evidently that in latter times some shall depart from the faith, and shall give heed unto spirits of error and doctrines of devils. Namely, verse 3. Forbidding to marry. I love that statement there from Perkins, because he's basically saying the Pope is a heretic by preventing his clergymen from marrying.

The scriptures are clear on this. Perkins next turns to responding to objections against marriage, and some may use the scriptures to object against this doctrine of marriage, these four ends of marriage that he has presented here.

So he goes next to address those objections. Objection 1. The apostle commands the married among the Corinthians to abstain with consent for a time that they might give themselves to fasting and prayer.

1 Corinthians 7 .5. Answer. Paul speaks not in that place of daily and common service of God and prayer, but of the solemn and extraordinary exercise thereof, which was joined with fasting and abstinence in common dangers and calamities.

Objection 2. 1 Corinthians 7 .32. He that is unmarried careth for the things of the Lord, how he may please the Lord. But the married person cares for the things of the world. Answer. The place is not generally to be understood of all, but indefinitely of those married persons that are carnal and fleshly.

And he that is married is to be so careful for the things of the world as that he ought and may have also a special regard of those things that concern God and his kingdom. Objection 3. 1 Timothy 5 .11.

The younger widows, saith the apostle, will marry, having damnation, because they have broken the first faith. Answer. By the first faith, Paul understands that promise and vow which they made unto Christ when they were baptized, and they are there said to begin to wax wanton against Christ by denying or renouncing that faith, and not otherwise.

Objection 4. He that does earnestly and from his heart crave the gift of continency, God will give it him, and therefore he need not marry. Answer. The gifts of God are of two sorts. Some are general, some are proper.

General gifts are such as God gives generally to all, and these may be obtained, if they be asked according to God's word lawfully. James 1 .5. If any of you lack wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all men liberally and reproacheth no man, and it shall be given him.

Verse 6. But let him ask in faith and waver not. Proper gifts are those which are given only to some certain men, of which sort is the gift of continency and such like, which though they be often and earnestly asked, yet they are seldom or never granted unto some men, as appears in Paul's example, who being buffeted by Satan saith of himself, For this thing I besought the Lord thrice, that it might depart from me, but he saith unto me, My grace is sufficient for you.

2 Corinthians 12, 8 and 9. So where Perkins makes this reference to continency, that's not a word we use regularly, but it basically means self-control. And we've been talking about this as we've been going through 1 Corinthians 7, and especially in verse 5, that you have self-control.

Devote yourselves to prayer and come together again so that Satan will not tempt you because of your lack of self-control. Now, some have such self-control that they need not marry. They have certain appetites of the flesh, or they rather don't have those appetites of the flesh.

And so there's not a need to have to marry to guard themselves from sexual immorality. I'll say from personal experience, that was definitely not me. I was a guy that was really struggling in that self-control in my flesh and was so delighted to have found such a good wife as I have, as Becky is, and many of you are familiar with that, who have listened to this program for a long time and you have been charmed by her as well.

I know you miss her and I've read your emails and we've heard your calls. God willing, we're hoping to have her back on the broadcast this coming Friday. And all God's people said, Amen. All right, let's continue on with a couple of verses here that we've got time for in 1 Corinthians 7.

Each Person's Gift From God and the Call to Remain as You Are

So this next part, I teased this out yesterday where Paul says, but this I say as a concession and not as a command. Yet I wish that all men were even as I myself am. However, each man has his own gift from God, one this way and another that.

And that goes right along with what we just read there from Perkins. So Paul says, this is a concession. It's not a command. He's not saying you have to be unmarried. I wish that you would remain unmarried because I want to protect you from some of those things you're going to have to go through in this world.

However, each man has his own gift from God. Some have been given a certain gift of self-control. That doesn't mean that the person who is able to control himself from some of those fleshly temptations is better than the person who has them and therefore must get married so that he will guard himself or protect himself from from sexual immorality.

It doesn't mean that one is better than the other. It's that God is granted unto different people, different things. So to one, they receive one gift from God. Paul calls it a gift. Each man has his own gift from God, one this way and another that.

So to remain single is a gift from God and to get married is a gift from God. To desire to be single is God's gift. It's a certain granting of self-control unto that person. To desire to be married, to want to go after marriage is also a gift from the Lord.

It's not one way or the other. One person's been cursed with this. The other's been blessed with this. That's certainly not the presentation that Paul makes here. So he says, I say this as a concession.

It's not as a command where he says that he's offering wisdom. He's not saying you have to do it this way or else. So in his wisdom as an apostle, and this wisdom is certainly greater than ours because it is a wisdom that comes from Christ.

An apostle of Jesus Christ is speaking the wisdom of God. This is not Paul in merely his humanness offering a Pauline opinion, but that even Christ through the apostle is speaking to say each man has his own gift.

Some called to marriage. Some are not. In Matthew chapter 19, when the Pharisees confronted Jesus and said, why did Moses command one to give a certificate of divorce and to send her away? Jesus responds, because of your hardness of heart, Moses allowed you to divorce your wives.

But from the beginning, it was not so. So the divorce was not a command. It was an allowance because of their hardness of heart. And Jesus says, I say to you, whoever divorces his wife except for sexual immorality and marries another commits adultery.

Consider what the disciples then said. So this is Matthew 19 verse 10. The disciples said to him, if such is the case of a man with his wife, it is better to not marry. And Jesus said to them, not everyone can receive this saying, but only those to whom it is given.

For there are eunuchs who have been so from birth, and there are eunuchs who have been made eunuchs by men. In other words, they've been castrated. So they have no sexual desire or appetite. And Jesus says there are eunuchs who have made themselves eunuchs for the sake of the kingdom of heaven.

Let the one who is able to receive this receive it. So if one is married, he should be committed to that vow and remain married until death do us part. But to the one who is unmarried, if he is able to stay unmarried and he is not being tempted by his flesh that he would otherwise have to be married because of his lack of self-control, he is to remain in service unto the Lord.

This is a gift. Each man has his own gift from God. One this way, another that. And again, Paul saying this here in verses six and seven as a concession, not as a command. Whoever has ears to hear, let him hear, as it says in the scriptures.

Closing Prayer and Program Sign-Off

Well, that's our lesson today and brings us to a conclusion of our study of 1 Corinthians this week. Tomorrow, we're going to come back to our study of Proverbs and then our Q &A on Friday, God willing.

Let's finish with prayer. Heavenly Father, we thank you for these things, for the wisdom that you have given to us, how we may know how we are to be in our marriages, how we are to be in a single life, that we commit ourselves fully unto the Lord, whether married or single.

We live unto Christ. We walk in purity and holiness before you, and we know what that holiness is supposed to look like because of what we read in your word. May we be pleasing sacrifices in your sight this day.

Forgive us our sins and help us to be patient and forgiving with each other. It's in Jesus name that we pray.

Amen. You've been listening to When We Understand the Text with Pastor Gabe Hughes. Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday, Gabe will be going through a New Testament study. Then on Thursday, we look at an Old Testament book.

On Friday, we take questions from the listeners and viewers. Tomorrow, we'll pick up on an Old Testament study, When We Understand the Text.