Redeeming Words

No Compromise Radio

Subscribe

Download

Share

00

00:12

Welcome to No Compromise Radio Ministry. My name is Mike Abendroth, and it is a Wednesday show. That means video, audio,

00:18

Mario, see that? Video, audio, Mario.

00:35

Miguelito, perfecto. All right, that wraps up the show. I always wanted to be a comedian.

00:42

I remember I saw Steve Martin like in 1976 in Omaha, I think at the

00:50

Orpheum Theater. And that was the whole, I don't want to do some King Tut. If you're old enough, you'll know what

00:57

I'm talking about. If you want some books, law, gospel, a primer, Jesus and Cancer, Cancer's Not Your Shepherd, Discovering Colossians, the books that I have via Amazon.

01:10

And you want to buy 10 or more, you can write me, mike, at nocompromiseradio .com. I'll give you 40 % off.

01:16

It's just drop shipped through Amazon. Takes a couple of weeks to get there, but it will save you some money.

01:21

If not, you can just go. I guess you could go pay full price. So far, I've getting some good feedback on law, gospel, a primer.

01:29

I think some wanted it, maybe not a primer, but a secondary book that is higher

01:35

IQ, theologically written for teachers and preachers. Maybe I could do that, but this was just an intro.

01:42

It is a primer after all, law, gospel, a primer. Today, I want to talk a little bit more about the tongue.

01:51

Last show, seemed like just a few minutes ago, but that was last week. I think I had a different shirt on too, but we still had

02:00

Mario. Talked about the tongue in James. And remember, when it comes to James, James is third use law.

02:11

What do I mean by that? A first use of the law, God shows us our sin when we're unbelievers so that we see ourselves as we really are, not in comparison to other people, but then we would look to the

02:24

Lord Jesus for salvation. So you preach the law to unbelievers, so they see their sin. Well, you preach the law to believers, certainly to remind them of what they used to deserve.

02:36

But the third use is a guide. It's a norm. It's a direction. It's kind of like, these are family rules.

02:43

These are family commands. This will honor your father and it'll be good for you. It'll be good for your neighbor. And that's what the book of James is.

02:50

54 imperatives in 108 verses. It's not test of saving faith. It's you're saved because of the

02:57

Lord Jesus through faith. And now how do you live? Especially in chapter one, verse one, when you're scattered, when you're dispersed, when you're persecuted, you know, you've got a bunch of grapes and you slam your fist down and the juice just goes everywhere.

03:11

That's pretty much what has happened. There has been satanic persecution and the fist goes down and it spreads out.

03:21

And by the way, what Satan means for evil, God means for good because now the message of Christianity goes all over.

03:28

If you're hunkered down in Jerusalem, it doesn't spread as fast or as far. So how do you live a life when you're getting persecuted?

03:35

Well, you count it all joy when you fall into various trials. You ask God for wisdom. That's verse three and verse five.

03:42

You don't blame God when you're tempted. You are a doer of God's word. The list goes on. And you move to chapter three, you think about the tongue rightly.

03:51

And what James does is he says that little tiny two ounce slab of mucus membrane can control things and affect things.

04:01

The bridle in the bit in a horse's mouth controls the horse.

04:07

The rudder in a ship controls the ship. And so too, our mouths can either be used for hellish purposes or to praise.

04:16

And it should seem very illogical for us through the book of James to praise

04:21

God with our mouths and then slam our neighbor or speak improperly about somebody else or to sin with our lips.

04:30

So we talked a little bit last time about praying those prayers of Psalm 141.

04:35

Set a guard, O Lord, over my mouth. Or Psalm 19, verse 14. Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable in your sight,

04:44

O Lord, my rock and my redeemer. That we can't control the tongue in and of ourselves, in and of our own power.

04:52

We can't do it. The fruit of the spirit, part of the fruit of the spirit is self -control. So how can we control our lips?

05:01

And I thought of a verse that I think might scare you, but I wanted to clear up because it relates to the tongue.

05:08

Matthew 12, verse 36. Does this first scare you? I tell you on the day of judgment, this is

05:16

Jesus talking. I tell you on the day of judgment, people will give account for every careless word they speak.

05:23

For by your words, you will be justified. And by your words, you will be condemned. Give an account for every careless word you speak.

05:36

Does that scare you? How about every sinful word?

05:42

How about every gossip, every slander, every backbiting, every negative word?

05:49

I wonder if that's kind of got you shaking. Would you ever say to a Christian, on judgment day, you're going to be judged for every careless word you've ever said?

06:01

Good question. Mario was looking at me like, Mike, what are you gonna say? Now let's think big picture.

06:10

Of course, these words are true by the Lord Jesus. How could they not be? Remember he's talking about tree and its fruit.

06:17

But I want you to remember, theologically, big picture -ly analogy of faith, what does scripture teach?

06:28

What's judgment look like for a Christian on judgment day? Will you be judged for your sins?

06:34

And of course we know the answer to that. And the answer is, your sins have been paid in full.

06:41

Jesus on the cross, it is finished. Tetelestai, paid in full.

06:47

God is just, and therefore you're not going to have to pay for your sins and Jesus pay for your sins.

06:53

That's called double what? Double jeopardy. Once they're paid for, they're paid for. So when you think of judgment day, remember

07:01

Revelation chapter 20. Christians, when their name's written in the book of life, there's no judgment.

07:09

Judgment has been done on the Lord Jesus. It's called Good Friday. For the unbeliever, it says they're going to be judged for what they've done.

07:19

For the believer, it doesn't say anything about what they've done or not done. It just says their names are written in the book of life. So on judgment day, for the

07:26

Christian, it's celebration, it's vindication, it's no tears, it's no crying.

07:31

It's Belgic Confession chapter 37. It is praise and glory and honor because your judgment has been paid in full, including what you say.

07:41

This is a great verse. For people who aren't Christians to say, by the way, if you look at a woman with lust, you've already committed adultery.

07:49

That's true. And by the way, you're going to be judged for every careless word you've ever said, including every sinful word you've ever said.

07:58

And of course they should be undone. They should be thinking, I've run my mouth a lot. Think how many times you can sin with your mouth.

08:05

I mean, thousands of times, millions of times. How many times we sin with our mouth? A lot. Especially if we're supposed to be loving

08:12

God with our heart, soul, mind, and strength, supposed to be speaking as unbelievers, praiseworthy things about God and we don't do it.

08:20

So I just want you to know, Christian, here's my point. Before I talk more about the tongue, if anybody throws this verse out to you and says, by the way, you're going to be judged.

08:31

I'm not talking about rewards. I'm not talking about crowns. I'm not talking about, are there rewards in heaven?

08:37

To what degree the rewards are? I'm not talking about that. I'm talking about judgment for sin. And they try to use this against you to say, you know what,

08:46

I better be very careful because I'm going to be judged for these sins on judgment day.

08:52

They've already been judged. And by the way, since they've already been judged, then use your mouth to speak properly and to honor

08:58

God in light of that, as gratitude and thankfulness to what the Lord has done. If you're an unbeliever, you're going to give an account.

09:07

If you're a believer, I'm not talking about the rewards part here, but I'm talking about judgment. You aren't going to give an account for your words because they've already been accounted for, paid in full.

09:17

I think that's good news. Well, back to the topic at hand. What about ways to not sin with our tongue?

09:26

That's the show today. Mike Abenroth, No Compromise Radio. How not to sin with our tongue. Last time, Mike, you said it's easy.

09:32

It's illogical. There's effects, fire, poison, hell.

09:37

World of iniquity. What do we do now? Well, just a few anecdotes.

09:43

First, a wise old bird sat on an oak. The more he heard, the less he spoke.

09:50

The less he spoke, the more he heard. Why not model after that wise old bird? Calvin said he used to fast from talking.

10:01

So one of my suggestions is you don't have to talk as much.

10:06

That's really hard for me to say because that's kind of what I like to do. I'd always say to Kim, you don't listen.

10:15

Kim's my wife. You don't listen to No Compromise Radio? You don't read my books? She's like, no, of course

10:20

I don't. I live with the book. I live with the radio show. Why would I want to listen to you on the radio show?

10:27

One man said, silence is golden. Not many people can be arrested for hoarding.

10:36

Spurgeon said, it's a pity there's not a tax on words. Another man said, talk is cheap because the supply always exceeds the demand.

10:51

Plato, wise men talk because they have something to say. Fools talk because they have to say something.

11:04

Interesting. Someone also said that it takes a baby two years to learn how to talk and 50 years to keep his mouth shut.

11:21

Now, let me read this verse and what goes through your mind. Two verses.

11:28

When Herod saw Jesus, he was very glad for he had long desired to see him because he had heard about him and was hoping to see some sign done by him.

11:37

So Herod questioned Jesus at some length, but Jesus made no answer. Interesting.

11:48

How do we think about that? What's the interpretation? Sinclair Ferguson, talking about a silent savior at this point.

11:58

Jesus was silent, Ferguson writes, because of every word that has proceeded from your lips, because of every word that provides adequate reason for God to damn you for all eternity, because you've cursed him or his image.

12:11

The Lord Jesus came into the world to bear the judgment of God against the sin of our tongues.

12:17

When Jesus stood before the high priest in the judgment seat of Pontius Pilate, he accepted a sentence of guilt.

12:24

But that was my guilt. He bore in his body on the tree, the sins of my lips and my tongue.

12:34

Ferguson, do you wish you could control your tongue better? Do you want to follow the example of Jesus?

12:41

Then you need to understand that he is savior first, then he is example.

12:47

You need to come conscious of the sin of your lips and say, God, be merciful to me, a sinner.

12:55

I thank you that Jesus came and was silent in order that he might bear the penalty of all the misuse of my tongue.

13:02

And when you know that he has taken God's judgment and wrath against your every sinful word, you cannot but come to him and say, oh, for a thousand tongues to sing my great redeemer's praise.

13:16

And Ferguson says, all the guilt can be cleansed away. Christ can deliver you from the misuse of the tongue.

13:22

And when you come to him conscious of that sin, you discover what a glorious savior he is.

13:30

Makes me want to say, Lord, would you please forgive me for what I say, how

13:35

I say it, to whom I say it. Anybody you need to ask forgiveness from when it comes to your tongue.

13:47

So negatively, we've talked about the tongue. Some positive things we've talked about the tongue. And the next thing

13:53

I want to do on the show is, if I can keep my voice. You thought I was getting emotional. I was just, I couldn't swallow.

14:00

Mario knows my lunch that I had today. Sardines in hot tomato sauce.

14:09

The can was like this. I couldn't even open it. I don't have a can opener here at the church building. And the crunchy vertebrae that were in those sardines, they were, that was nasty.

14:21

The good news is no carbs. The bad news is I probably can't eat dinner.

14:28

And I can't talk, which is probably, I'm talking about fasting from talking.

14:33

How do you do that on a radio show? It's called dead air, my friend. It's called dead air. In Ephesians, remember there's kind of a replacement theology.

14:46

And I don't mean Israel and the church. That's not what I'm talking about. Stop doing this sin and start doing this thing that's righteous.

14:55

In other words, put off and put on. Based on who you are in Christ, union with Christ, spirit of God dwelling in you, the power to say yes to righteousness and no to sin, the power to kill sin and to say yes to righteousness, the power to respond to God's sanctifying work by faith and then mortification and vivification.

15:14

Put off, put on. So don't be lazy, work.

15:20

He literally says, don't steal, work. What does he say? Don't be bitter, but to forgive.

15:27

Don't lie, tell the truth. So here are a few things that I probably found from other people that are replacement things instead of slander, gossip.

15:39

You know what I could call this? Let me say it this way. Do you have a TMZ mouth?

15:46

Always talking about people, always wanting the inside scoop, always wanting the scuttle. Now, sometimes you learn about things and you pray for people at church, but even prayer lists and prayer chains can be nothing more than gossip, right?

15:59

Did you hear about so -and -so versus, oh, this person needs help and we ought to pray and it could easily befall me and we better reach out to them and how can we help them in their time of need, even though it's self -inflicted sin.

16:17

There's a different way to go about it. So here are a few things. While you can't tame the tongue, the spirit of God can, and while you can't tame the tongue, you can replace sinful things that you might say with these things.

16:29

Here's a list. I'm sure it's not with me originally, but I've got the list here.

16:36

Instead of saying sinful things, number one, you can say things about God to him and be thankful.

16:45

Let me rephrase that. You can thank God for things. Hebrews 13, 15. Through him then let us continually offer up a sacrifice of praise to God, that is the fruit of lips that give thanks to his name.

16:59

God, thank you for who you are, what you've done, my salvation, my wife, my four children, my ability to work, my health, my mind, the smell.

17:13

I can smell food, my taste buds, how I can taste, my ears, I can listen to music, my eyes,

17:19

I could see the sunset and the list goes on and on and on. My fingers that I can touch and feel and feel the hand of my wife as we walk hand in hand down the beach or whatever it might be.

17:31

Instead of complaining, because by the way, I haven't talked about this much, but it's one of the biggest sins of the tongue is complaining.

17:40

It's a complaint against God's sovereignty. It's a complaint about God's weather. It's a complaint about God's circumstances.

17:46

My wife could be more holy, more this, more that. It's all against God's sovereignty.

17:52

And so instead of complaining, we're gonna be thankful. When's the last time you thanked God? God, thank you for who you are and what you've done, what you've done in my life.

18:02

How faithful you've been in the past. You're faithful to me now. You're gonna be faithful in the future. You're faithful to me in the hospital last

18:10

Friday. You're gonna be faithful to me in the future. Number two, what can we do to replace things?

18:17

This is pretty much related, but how about singing to the Lord? I love to sing.

18:23

I've actually sang in public a couple of times just on the radio, not like as a duet up front. We used to have a couple of elders that could really sing well.

18:31

So I wanted to do an elder sing, elder song that we would sing with Dave Jeffries, Louis Brown, because they would carry me, but now they've since moved on.

18:42

And then one now is in glory, Louis is. I always wanted to sing, but I can sing with the voice that God has given me.

18:50

It says in Psalm 13, six, I will sing to the Lord because he's dealt bountifully with me. I had an assignment back in seminary.

18:57

We had to pray in our prayer class one hour a day. You had to write it down and hand it into the teacher.

19:03

Now you can think that's pietistic. You can think that's legalistic. You could think this out of the other, but we had to pray for an hour a day and we could only break it up into 30 minute segments.

19:13

That is to say, you couldn't say, I'm gonna pray 12 times throughout the day at five minutes at a shot, 12 times 560 had to be 30 minutes and 30 minutes.

19:24

So I had an hour drive home from work in Los Angeles traffic. And so I begin to try to pray and I would think about the

19:33

ACTS acronym and adoration and confession, thanksgiving, supplication, who to pray for.

19:39

I mean, now I use my hands in terms of prayers for people because I think

19:45

Kim, Hailey, Luke, Maddie, Gracie, Marty, Hannah, Eleazar, Amos and Clara.

19:55

So, you know, I could go through all that, but I was having a hard time driving and praying.

20:00

Can't really close your eyes. So I just started putting on music and I would just sing out loud.

20:07

I'd get those great hymns that I knew the words to and I would sing.

20:13

And by the way, if you were me, would you have counted that singing to the Lord as part of prayer? Now, maybe some people would say that's not prayer, but it's certainly prayer.

20:24

Praise to God, singing. Of course, if you wanna listen to sports radio or other secular music or whatever you wanna do, you do whatever you want.

20:32

But a good way to work with the tongue is to not only say thanks, but to sing.

20:38

And you can just sing on the way home, sing in the car, put your favorite music on and sing unto the Lord. It says in Psalm 18, therefore

20:45

I will give thanks to thee among the nations and I will sing praises to your name. All right, what else could you do?

20:54

Put off complaining, put off slander, put off gossip, put off backbiting, put off exasperating words as a dad and put on.

21:01

Okay, what do we put on? How about evangelizing? That's one of the great things you could do. I mean, it's easy when you're around unbelievers to say things that you ought not to say.

21:11

That is to say, you're around the proverbial copy machine and the water fountain at work when they used to have that before remote.

21:20

Remote's kind of going away. Real life is coming back again. And it's easy to just complain about wives.

21:27

Everybody's, they're complaining about their spouse, ball and chain. And before you know it, maybe you are joining the conversation sadly.

21:35

Well, how about preaching? How about evangelism? I don't mean for your job, but I'm talking about in your free time.

21:42

It says, how shall they call upon him in whom they have not believed? How shall they believe in him whom they've not heard?

21:49

How shall they hear without a preacher? That's Romans chapter 10. That would be a good thing to do.

21:55

Okay, here's another one. Edifying one another, edifying one another.

22:02

Warren Wearsby has 12 words and he says that they can transform your life.

22:09

So maybe you just tune in just for this. 12 words to transform your life that you can say, instead of using your tongue to sin, you use your tongue to transform your life and other people's lives.

22:23

Mario's looking at me. He wants to know the words, but I'm just dragging this out more and more because if he wants to know, you all want to know as well.

22:30

12 words that will change your life. Here are the words. I hope there's 12. I didn't count ahead of time.

22:38

I'm just taking Wearsby for his word. Please, thank you, forgive me,

22:50

I love you, I'm praying for you.

22:59

Please, thank you, forgive me, I love you, I'm praying for you.

23:06

Wow. Now I was really good at forcing the kids to say please and thank you.

23:14

So when they wanted something, they needed to say please. And we ended up teaching our children how to sign language please before they could say please because they can sign before they can talk usually.

23:26

So please, and I think that's thank you. So I was big on please because in my house growing up in Nebraska, if you didn't say please and thank you, you got whacked.

23:36

Usually by mom. Maybe she didn't correct us for that, but verbal correction at least.

23:42

Please and thank you. It doesn't cost you anything. It's like when the policeman pulls you over and writes you a ticket.

23:48

I just say usually thank you. Why am I thanking? Thank you for your service.

23:54

We could do that. Not thank you for the ticket. Oh, by the way, do you want to get out of tickets? Here's a surefire way to get out of tickets if you're pulled over by a state trooper called a statey or a sheriff or anything else.

24:08

First of all, don't be a jerk and say you're a sovereign citizen and all that other stuff. Pull over where you should.

24:15

Side of the road. Hands 10 and 2 position. Have your window down. Hands 10 and 2. He comes over.

24:21

She comes over. And they say, well, you know, did you know you were speeding or this, that, or the other?

24:27

I always say this. Officer, I want to give you an excuse, but there's no excuse.

24:37

I'm guilty. They look at you like I've never heard anybody say that.

24:43

That you say you're guilty. I mean, if you're going 110 miles an hour and it's 50 mile an hour zone, if you're a drunk driver or something like that, you're not going to get out of it.

24:52

But if you're eight miles an hour over or 10 miles an hour over and you get pulled over, I've yet to get a ticket by saying, officer,

25:00

I want to offer you a lot of excuses and try to talk my way out of it. But you're exactly right.

25:06

I'm guilty. So that's just between us. Mario, give it a shot sometime.

25:13

Please, thank you. Forgive me. I love you. I'm praying for you. So let's just talk about this for just a second.

25:21

When's the last time you said to your spouse or to your kids even? Maybe kids not as often, but to your spouse, honey,

25:30

I need to ask for your forgiveness. Shouldn't that be a regular thing that we do when we sin against our spouse?

25:39

I'm not trying to tell you every day you have to say it. I think every day you should say, I love you. I love you every day.

25:49

When it was Valentine's Day, I didn't know what to do for Kim because two days later, we were going to go up and cross country ski in New Hampshire.

26:00

I had a free hotel room. So we're going to go up there. By the way, I've never been more sore in my life. We took lessons.

26:06

I'm glad I did because most things I don't take lessons and I would never have figured it out the proper way. Just the gliding and the legs.

26:14

And I ride a bicycle and work out a couple times a week, legs at the gym, but I'm so tired.

26:22

I could barely walk. Where am I going with this story? I actually know where I'm going with this story.

26:28

So what did I do for Kim? I just got some Post -its and I wrote the entire alphabet on Post -its and put them up the handrail up into the house.

26:39

So A, adorable, B, beautiful. I was going to only just do kind of her looks because she looks so great, but I thought

26:47

I better do some internal things that gentle for G or whatever all the way up.

26:56

And when you get to X, I don't know what you do. X, how would you describe your wife with the letter

27:01

X? Excellent, I don't know. My point is words matter, right?

27:09

I didn't have to go buy a card or anything else. Just putting some time and some thought into it. When's the last time you said,

27:15

I love you? And I try to say it, I also try to write it. We have a men's discipleship group here at the church and I regularly have the men write a letter to their wives.

27:25

It's a love letter and they have to spend 30 minutes on it. So you just can't just buy a card and write your name at the very bottom.

27:33

It's going to take you a half hour because women want to know you're thinking about them and you're invested and it's a vested thing.

27:40

And so it takes a half hour. Time is important for ladies. And we had one guy at the church when the week after and we go around the room and I say, well, how'd your wife like the letter?

27:52

Because I tell the guys, you write the letter and you set it down and then you don't say, honey, did you get the letter?

27:58

I know you want to say it, but you just tuck it someplace where she'll see it that week and go off to work and see what happens.

28:04

And so we go around the room, oh, my wife loved it and she kept it and she put it in a frame, whatever the guys say.

28:10

So one guy said, how'd your wife like the letter? He said, well, she said to me, did

28:18

Pastor Mike make you write the letter? Because she hasn't received a letter like that from me for 49 years.

28:28

I said, but I bet you she kept it. And I bet you she thinks it's valuable to her.

28:35

And he's like, yeah. So all that to say, don't wait 49 years. You can say these things and you can write them.

28:41

When's the last time you wrote your wife a love letter? Mario, has it been 49 years?

28:49

Please, thank you, forgive me, I love you and I'm praying for you. Now that last one, when you say it, you want to do it, right?

28:57

You want to make sure you're praying, but just, I'm praying for you. When people tell me that,

29:03

I'm encouraged because I need the prayer. I've had some people say to me, Mike, I pray for you every day.

29:13

And then some of those grandmas die. And now who's praying for me?

29:20

But of course, I remember Hebrews 7, verse 25, that Jesus, the great mediator, the high priest, he lives to make what?

29:29

Intercession for us. He prays for us. And so of course the Lord is praying for us. Number five,

29:36

I think it is, talked about this last time a little bit earlier too on encouragement. Listen to some of these verses.

29:43

1 Thessalonians 5, 11. Therefore, encourage one another and build up one another just as you are also doing.

29:50

I know you're doing that, Church of Thessalonica, but keep doing that. Encourage one another.

29:57

Thank you, you mean a lot to me. And by the way, this is really good advice for dads because if dads aren't careful, they're just giving law to their children.

30:06

It's good to give your children law. Do this, don't do that. Pick up, don't turn the lights off.

30:11

We don't want to work for the power company. I mean, there's a hundred different rules that are good to give. You should give your kids rules.

30:17

You're not wanting them to be lawless. But just the encouraging the children.

30:23

If you like to be encouraged and that makes you motivated to keep going and to do better and to think, yes, somebody notices.

30:31

I wonder how much your children need to be encouraged. And by the way, what makes grandparents so great?

30:38

I don't know, maybe they have more wisdom. Maybe they realize they don't have to be the cop and the law person because they're parents to do that.

30:47

Why do kids love grandparents so much? Because they essentially just root for them and clap and encourage and way to go.

30:56

I don't have the burden of providing every little thing for them and changing every diaper and feeding them three times a day for 365 days a year.

31:05

I just get to be the grandpa. So when you come over, yeah, your grandpa has some rules. You know, you're not gonna put your finger in that light socket.

31:12

You know, that's a no -no. But in general, hey, it's like that kid's like, grandpa, your job is to stand over there.

31:18

And when I do something, you clap. And so kids love their grandparents because why? They encourage them.

31:25

That's like the number one thing that the grandparents are good at. Encourage, encourage, encourage. And that just spurs the children on.

31:31

So on the show today, I'm talking about the tongue instead of using it to complain and backbite and slander and do other things.

31:37

Well, what can we do instead? And edify and encourage is such an important thing. It says in Hebrews 3, encourage one another day after day.

31:47

Ah, nah, I might take it out of context here a little bit, but you know, day after day, once.

31:52

I encourage you once, that's enough. 20 years ago. I mean, I'll give you my daddy wounds now if you want it.

32:01

I don't remember my dad hardly ever encouraging me. With his words. Now he encouraged me by being at my basketball games sometimes.

32:13

Football games sometimes. But encouraging words, I do the yard work and it was never, you did a good job.

32:21

It was always, this was done. I won't use his words. It's half baked.

32:27

He said something else. And so that just made me think, you know what? I'm gonna mow the lawn.

32:33

He's not going to like it. So I'll mow it and I'll take my lumps and I'll have to do it again anyway.

32:39

So the first time I might as well just be half baked because he's gonna whack me one way or the other with his words.

32:46

Instead of you're getting better, try this instead. This happened to me when I was a kid, but do this, that and such.

32:51

It's just demoralizing. And then you end up kind of being a mama's boy a little bit because you don't want to go talk to dad because dad's never going to encourage.

33:00

So I don't want to be that. You don't want to be that kind of guy, do you? I know you don't. Encourage one another day after day, over and over and over trying to encourage.

33:12

And then the last one is use words of comfort. Use words of comfort.

33:19

Now, of course, if you're going to be at a funeral, that's obvious, but here it's interesting.

33:26

Ephesians 6, 21 and 22, but that you may also know about my circumstances, Paul said, how

33:32

I am doing. Tychicus, the beloved brother and faithful minister in the Lord, will make everything known to you.

33:40

And I have sent him to you for this very purpose so that you may know about us and that he may comfort your hearts.

33:49

I've sent Tychicus. By the way, what's Tychicus mean in the original? Lucky, chance.

33:56

It's like, you know, you get saved and you have to get a new name, but Paul just kept him around as lucky because, oh, lucky just reminds me there's no such thing as luck.

34:06

And I've sent him to you with a purpose. What's the purpose? To get after you, to chide you, to tell you about all these things.

34:13

Well, certainly there's law in Ephesians that the Ephesus church needed, but I've sent you for a purpose that you might be comforted.

34:24

Isn't that good? I have some words of comfort. I want to just encourage you. And sometimes you don't have to say a word, right?

34:32

You can just go to somebody's, you can go to a funeral and just hug and say, I'm sorry, I love you, or just say nothing.

34:38

But there's a place for words. 1 Thessalonians 4, 18, comfort one another with these words.

34:46

So I want to be that kind of person. I want to be the kind of person that if someone comes to me and says, I've done some awful sins and I've repented and I regret and I need to work through these and I've got some bills to pay as it were because of it, but I didn't want to come to you pastor because I thought you'd just whack me.

35:09

I don't want that. I want to have people say, do you know what? If I go to the pastor and I'm gonna talk about sin and I'm gonna talk about repentance, he'll be there to comfort me.

35:21

That's my desire. I know that's your desire too, comforting people. I'm not affirming the sin.

35:27

I'm not saying sin is good, but I know what it's like to sin and need comfort. I know what it's like to lose a dad and then need comfort.

35:34

I know what it's like to have a sick child and then need comfort. I know what the NICU is like and then we need to have comfort.

35:40

And so how do we comfort people? Back to James now for a second. It's amazing to think the effect that this has on people negatively and positively, how much

35:51

I could just, I mean, I think I'm pretty quick with my tongue, how I could just slash and cut people down.

35:59

Or I could do the exact opposite and build them up. Dave Jeffries, I mentioned him earlier, wanting to sing with Dave.

36:08

And Dave Jeffries heard me preach once. It wasn't really that good of a sermon. It was in Ephesians, matter of fact.

36:14

And he came up to me afterwards. He's been, was a pastor, elder here. And he said,

36:21

Mike, if I were your dad, I'd be proud of you. Preaching week in and week out, being faithful.

36:30

I started to cry because I don't know if my dad ever said, I can't remember him saying,

36:36

Mike, I'm proud of you. I love you, I'm proud of you. Now, he loved me by providing for me and shelter and all that other stuff.

36:44

But those words, I'm proud of you. Talk about comforting, talk about edifying, talk about encouraging, making me want to just keep preaching and excel in preaching.

36:54

It's like, you know, if we comfort people too much, if we encourage them too much, they're going to slack off. No, it's the exact opposite.

37:01

How do I encourage people? I'm not talking about flattery. I'm talking about encouragement. And so I've regularly said now to young men, if I was your dad,

37:12

I'd be proud of you. And then I give him a big hug and I make them let up before I let up.

37:21

Meaning I'll just keep hugging you as long as you want. And so today on the radio show, how much time do we have?

37:29

We're over seven minutes. Well, you didn't tell me. Mike Avendroth, nocompromisedradio .com.