Mistakes We Make In Evangelism (part 3)

Bethlehem Bible Church

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Our Father in heaven, we are mindful that we fall short of your glory each and every day.

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But you are faithful, you are sure, you are steadfast. You have redeemed us, you keep us, and you will keep us until the day of Christ Jesus.

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Father, we thank you and praise you for that. And as we come to this topic of evangelism,

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I pray that first and foremost, the Lord Jesus Christ will be glorified. Even as we think and as we speak about these things,

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Father, that you would help motivate us to speak of Christ Jesus well and often to our friends, families, and even to other believers.

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We pray for these things in Jesus' name. Amen. Well, I have a bonus as we've been doing this list.

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I mean, I guess I really should sit down and write more about this because as we were driving this morning,

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I even thought of another one. You know, things that we do wrong in evangelism. We closed last week with, we act like we are better than they are.

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We talked about the need to be winsome, the need to be, I guess we could say, nice.

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You know, when Pastor Mike says it's good to be good and it's nice to be nice. Well, it is nice to be nice when you're talking about evangelism.

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You don't want to be the grumpy evangelist or the stage -cage evangelist.

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You must be saved. Is there truth to that? Must you be saved?

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Yes. But there's a whole affect that we need to take apart or take upon ourselves.

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But I thought, here's one that I didn't write down and I don't know why. Here's a mistake, and I guess it falls under we don't evangelize, but let's just go with this one.

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How about we practice lifestyle evangelism? Lifestyle evangelism, what is that?

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Can anybody define that? What is lifestyle evangelism, Bill? It's kind of like that, only it maybe is even worse.

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Dave? Yes, it's that mysterious, like,

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I'll set the good example, right? And then people will be like, that guy is such a good example.

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And look at his family, how wonderful they are. I should inquire as to how he does this.

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You know, what is his methodology? And then I have an open door for the gospel, right? Bill? Yes, preach the gospel often, and if all else fails, use words.

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And, of course, the problem with that is the gospel is words, right?

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And, you know, what's the problem with lifestyle evangelism? Okay, you're going to fail sometimes and not be a very good example.

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Okay, it teaches them that the gospel is about your life. Or, in other words, we could say it this way, that the gospel is about works, about being better, about being a good person.

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You know, he's a pillar of the community. He's a model of civility. He's, I guess

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I could say she, but I'm a he, so you get my point. The point is, people think that somehow being good tells people about Jesus.

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What does it really tell them? Not a lot. Like I said, it could just tell them, you know, be better, whatever.

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Is that the message we want to give people? No. And, you know, if somebody really knew me, would they think, oh,

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I want to be just like Steve? You laugh too hard, Dave. I see that, you know.

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The answer is no. I mean, and, you know, if you think about it, would you want somebody to be just like you? I'm like,

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I mean, what was my goal for my kids? Kids, I want you to grow up to be just like me. No.

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I want you to have better lives than I did, and I want you not to be stupid like me. You know, why do you correct your kids, you know?

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Because kids don't do what I did or what I do. Just don't do that. So lifestyle evangelism is a disaster.

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You know, imagine this. You're living this life, and people are like, oh,

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I think I'll go to Steve, and I'll ask him how he lives that life. And then you tell them about the gospel, and they go, well, how does that help me?

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Right? I mean, there's this, well, I can't help but notice that, you know, you watch

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TV on Sunday, or I saw you playing with your kids in the yard on Sunday. And, you know,

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I mean, they start thinking that it's legalism, and it's just wrong. Anyway, lifestyle evangelism is wrong.

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Number, this is seven, so I guess that was 6A. Seven. We try to close the sale.

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And I mentioned this before, just in a different context, but I mentioned

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Discipleship Evangelism at Grace Community Church, where it was called Evangelism Explosion. And what we would do is, you know, explain the benefits of Christianity, I guess you could say.

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Give them gospel, explain the benefits, and then ask them, you know, what would prevent them, basically, you know, like the

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Ethiopian eunuch in Acts 8, what prevents you now from being baptized? I've got a cup of water.

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Sorry. I couldn't resist that Presbyterian joke. So, thanks,

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Dave. So, what's wrong with that approach?

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You know, teach them a gospel, explain the benefits, and then, you know, press them for a decision.

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Okay, so, okay,

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I'm taking responsibility for making sure that they make the profession easier. Well, I mean, it's just like any salesman, right?

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You know, Steve, with all due respect, we just spent 45 minutes together.

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Shouldn't you buy this car? Yeah, I mean, it really does put the onus on the wrong side.

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Instead of it being on the person being convicted and changed by the Holy Spirit and thinking to themselves,

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I'm undone by the greatness of Christ, you know, I want to be right before the

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Lord. I believe that He's the Son of God. Help me to understand what do I do next, kind of thing. You know,

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I believe, help my unbelief. Instead, we're like, are you sure you don't believe?

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Let me explain this again. Can we recapitulate things and, you know, repackage them so that it makes sense to you,

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Dave? Yeah, the odds are good that you're going to make a false convert because you're pressurizing them, right?

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And then what was the other thing you said? Oh, yeah, because of that, you're going to give them false assurance.

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You know, welcome to the family of God. I mean, that was something I've heard that, you know, as soon as somebody makes a confession of faith, then the response is immediately, welcome to the family of God.

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I understand that, but I think, again, you know, it could be kind of premature.

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You know, it's just like, yeah, I mean, it could be a week. It could be a month. It could be instantly, you know, or it could be never.

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We don't know. Wes? Yeah, I mean, the methodology is bad, and it does kind of, if your methodology is bad in one area, then why wouldn't you use bad methodology in other areas?

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And it creates all kinds of problems. I'll tell you, excuse me, the after -action reports, the after -action meetings, you know, where we would get together at the end of the evening.

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We'd go out to these homes. It was interesting how they did it because you could just imagine

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Grace Community Church with seven, eight, 10 ,000 people there on a regular basis.

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And what they would do is they had attendance cards. I mean, you think our attendance books are cumbersome and problematic and blah, blah, blah.

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Imagine cards that every Monday, you know, a group of volunteers get together to sort into, you know, members, non -members, visitors, you know, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera.

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And then they go through, and they take these cards from visitors, and they make a list of them and, you know, then give them to this evangelism program, which meets probably about eight months out of the year to go and visit.

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And so we would take these cards, and sometimes they would be three, four, five months old.

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Okay? So then we'd go to somebody's door, and they're like, we're from Grace Community Church, you visited, and they're like,

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I did? I don't remember. You asked for a visit.

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I did? Well, it's right here on the card. You know, are you so and so? Yes. Is this such and such?

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Yes. Okay. Can we talk to you? I guess? You know, and I think one time, well, you know, it was like, find a way to make conversation with people.

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And so, you know, it was like, well, who are some of your favorite preachers? Oh, I really like to listen to Benny Hinn.

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This is going to take a while, you know. Do you have any refreshments? And then, you know, you're steering them away from that and toward the gospel, but the objective was to, you know, get a profession.

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So we'd sit around in these after action meetings. You know, there'd be like 30 people in this room.

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And, you know, tell us what happened tonight. Anybody get a profession of faith? I mean, what is that?

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It is kind of like a sales meeting, right? Anybody get a sale tonight? And that's just, it's just kind of an odd, you know, again, an odd methodology.

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Yeah, you browbeat people. I mean, there are physical methods I have used, but no,

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I only get, yeah, yeah.

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I mean, and some of that is just, you know, unbelievers being unbelievers, right, or responding like unbelievers.

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Because, you know, like, how dare you make me feel guilty? Friend, we're all guilty.

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You know, I don't have to make you feel guilty. I'm just bringing out the truth, the reality of the situation. But anyway, okay, so number eight.

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And I guess maybe I could have combined this with six, because there's some parallels here.

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But we act like we know all the answers. So you start answering questions from this unbeliever.

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And, you know, it gets to a point where they're asking questions that seem pretty difficult, you know, above your pay grade, so to speak.

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But you just keep asking or answering them anyway, right? Or as we like to say in my former profession, you know, you just make it up as you go along, right?

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You're just, because you don't know, but you're just going to answer anyway.

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Because to say something like, I don't know, seems like a cop out.

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Seems like a failure. So just give them an answer anyway. But it's okay to say what?

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I don't know. Can I get back to you on that? It's fine. Dave. I do know him.

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He's invited me over for breakfast. I haven't met it yet, but yes. Because it is true, right?

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If you said something like, someone says, well, why should I believe? Given the fact that there's so much evil in the world, this isn't an objection.

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Given the fact that there are, you know, kids who are dying and being abducted, and, you know, why doesn't

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God stop that? Why is there evil in the world? And, you know, okay. So Dan says, well, supposing I could give you an intellectually satisfying answer for that.

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Suppose I could, whatever your objection is, I can come up with a rationale to sort of smooth that over.

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Then what would you say about this Jesus that I presented to you? Well, I still don't think

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I need him. Right? I mean, that's, I still think I'm okay. Right. Right.

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Bill. Yeah. If the Holy Spirit isn't working on them, they're not going to get it anyway. And I'm trying to recall the exact,

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I mean, you talk about stupid social media interactions. Most of them are stupid. Yeah, just about all of them.

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But I'm trying to recall this one, but I just had the idea while I was reading this person's post, because this is, it goes right along with what

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Bill's saying. There are people who want to reduce belief to, you know, an intellectual exercise.

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In other words, we give them the facts, and then they say, well, I believe that. Okay. But when the reformers say knowledge, assent, trust, there's a reason they say that.

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Knowledge. I understand what you're saying. Assent. I agree with what you're saying.

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Fine. Is that enough? I know what you're saying.

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I agree with what you're saying. The Bible says I'm a horrible human being and there's no hope for me apart from Jesus Christ. I get that.

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Am I saved? Well, why not? And it comes down to what Bill's saying, right?

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From the divine perspective, Jesus said to Nicodemus, what? You must be born again.

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Well, why did he say that? Why didn't he tell Nicodemus to go do something or to research something or to, you know, whatever?

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Nicodemus knew enough to be saved, but he hadn't trusted in Christ.

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Well, why not? Because he hadn't been born again. God had not so moved in his life that he then, you know, became...

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I mean, it is a fascinating interaction. If you just read

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John 3 from the perspective of an evangelist and you say to yourself, why didn't

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Jesus do this? And, of course, he has perfect knowledge, right? But there are a lot of things that modern evangelists do today that Jesus didn't do.

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And you go, why? Because he knew things that we don't know, sure. But it's also because he understood that, you know, the

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Holy Spirit has to go first. There has to be something done to people. Charlie? Yes. So, you know, to just kind of give the opposite side of that and to kind of buttress what

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I'm saying, is it okay to answer objections? Yes. Right? I want to give scriptural answers for things, but, you know, there are times where it just becomes rather pointless.

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Right? Like, why should I believe in your God and not, you know... Well, I mean,

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I'm only declaring the God who spoke and all of creation came into being.

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So, you know, your choice, Jonathan. Yeah, they need to repent and believe in the gospel.

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Just to clarify, not to pick on you, but it's knowledge, assent, trust. They have to trust in Christ, you know, to essentially rest in him.

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To basically, I mean, if we could do it this way, you know, if we think about the current nonsense, you know, that happens in corporate meetings and they say, you know, we're going to do a trust fall.

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Well, that's the idea. Right? You just kind of like, I'm just trusting in Christ.

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He's all I have. I've seen a few hands. Corey? I mean, in evangelism terms, she could possibly be saying something like, well, you know, you're spiritual.

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I'm spiritual. Let's just agree that spirituality is a good thing. You know, and that's a very...

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Yeah, that's a very good, you know, analogy. But I think, you know, when it comes to objections, it's okay to answer them up to a point.

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You say, what is that point? Well, I can't define it, except to say this. When people basically are just trying to, you know, take you on a rabbit trail that is ridiculous, then at some point you need to just call it.

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But I think it's always important, no matter what the question is, to kind of get back to the gospel.

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Right? Because these things, a lot of times, they're just like, you know, you're like, did you know that the

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Bible says that apart from Christ, your sins will take you to hell? And then it's like, flashbang.

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Look at that. You know, well, what about, you know, and what about that?

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And the next thing you know, it's just like, they're throwing up all these distractions. Why?

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Because they don't want to deal with the truth of what you're saying. The truth is convicting.

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The truth is something foreign to them. It's something that they're not used to hearing. And they're just like,

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I don't really want to talk about all this. This is making me uncomfortable. So that is kind of interesting, right? The Reformers say, knowledge, assent, trust, not knowledge, assent, submit.

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Well, I think it comes back to this. You know, what happens if we just think about maybe

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John 15, or not John 15, Luke 15? The three parables, you know, what happens when you find the lost coin?

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What happens when you find the lost sheep? What happens when the lost son returns, right?

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Is there an aura of submission? It's celebration, joy, right?

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And it's that idea, you know, when we say trust, we don't often think of that. But if you just say, you know, what is my thought when

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I think of the gospel? It should be joy, right? Not submission.

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And, you know, the corollary, I would argue, to joy is trust.

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The corollary to submission is kind of when

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I have to submit, I do it, but I have to fight against my flesh, which wants to do what?

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Grumble, right? I mean, do I joyfully submit? Not as often as I should.

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But I think it's a difference of, you know, just kind of attitude.

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When I understand what I deserve, then, you know, trust is more, right, Andrew? Right.

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Yeah, I mean, my first response to submission isn't, yes. Well, yeah, and, you know, if I could just add this to what you just said about, you know,

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Jesus joyfully submits. You know, now you could argue in Gethsemane he didn't joyfully submit, but I would say this, that he, understanding what was in front of him, which, you know, more punishment than anybody's ever faced, said, nevertheless, not my will, but, you know, your will be done.

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But let's just kind of think about Jesus and the picture we have of Jesus throughout the

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New Testament, particularly in the Gospels. But when we talk about, and I did a minute ago, lifestyle evangelism, there is a life that we can point to, right?

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But it's not our life. There is one we can show that in every way he was tempted, just as we are, but without sin.

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He always did everything right. And this is very important for people to understand while we're giving them the

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Gospel, because everybody would agree with this statement, almost everybody. I mean, some people are,

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I have to choose my words carefully here, prideful, okay?

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When you say nobody's perfect, there's bound to be, you know, you're going to run into somebody who says, well,

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I am, or, you know, I'm so close that I can't distinguish between my perfection and, you know, something else.

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But as soon as we say nobody's perfect, the picture of Jesus ought to, you know, most people think, even unbelievers think to themselves,

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Jesus was perfect, insofar as they can comprehend perfection.

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Yeah, I'm not, and trust me, I'm not arguing against submission. I'm just saying that I don't think trust, you know, is equal to submission.

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Yes. Okay. I would agree with that. Submission is the successful conducting of ourselves in alignment with the truth of the

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Gospel. I mean, can you imagine that, you know, talking about diffusing a bomb and how we would listen to somebody giving us instructions?

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It's a great illustration, because can you imagine, you know, you're talking to an expert or whatever, and you've got this bomb, and the timer's going do -do -do -do -do -do, and they say, cut the green wire, and you go, nah.

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They're like, no, really, cut the green wire or you're going to blow up. Bro, are you trying to give me instructions?

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Are you trying to tell me what to do? I'm a free agent. Don't, you know, it's like, yeah, not a bomb in a good way.

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Oh, it was the bomb. Yeah. Dave. All right. Dave.

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Dave. Dave. I'm going to learn it by next week.

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Listen, there's nothing wrong. I just don't have any problem with the idea of submitting, right?

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We submit to the truth. We submit to the Lord. I think, though, when we're looking at the paradigm of knowledge, assent, and trust, well, now, exactly where in that paradigm does submission fit?

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I have to be honest. I don't really care. Okay, because here's the thing.

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Knowledge. I know who God is. Assent. You know, knowledge.

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I know who God is. I believe in Jesus. I believe in the Trinity. You know, I believe that I'm a sinner.

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You know, assent. All these things have an effect on me, you know, and I really feel the weight of everything, and I kind of get it, and I know that I'm bound for hell.

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Okay, trust. Well, that is not, you know, ultimately. It sounds like an intellectual exercise, but it's not.

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It's something that, you know, faith is granted to me, and because of that faith, that non -meritorious instrument, as the reformers called it, which means what?

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That God gives it to me, and then, you know, it transforms me because it's part of the being born again, given a new heart, new affections, everything else.

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I now repent and believe at the same time, and I trust. So where is submission in all of that?

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I don't know, you know, and I don't really know that where exactly it falls in the paradigm matters.

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I would just say that to import. I just don't want to get into a lordship discussion because it's not.

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If you understand that Jesus Christ is God, well, he is Lord. Any discussion after that, you know, well, like, how much do

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I have to obey? It's the wrong question, right? How much do I hate my sin is a much better question.

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That's right. Is it pico or pico?

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Okay, I'll take your word for it. Okay, all right. It is a very much a

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Catholic doctrine. You know, there are people, and I mean, we're just going to go far afield here. There are people who say that you're justified at salvation.

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And then, you know, on Judgment Day, if you have sufficient works, then you're justified again, or you have final justification, or however they want to frame it.

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That's Roman Catholic, right? Did you do enough during your saved life to merit heaven?

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And I want to say to those Protestant theologians, well, okay, if I don't, then do

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I go to purgatory? What happens? Because is my initial justification washed away?

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God declared me righteous, and he goes, oh, just kidding. I didn't really mean that. Well, yeah, how did he submit?

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Well, you know, I mean, again, we're kind of wondering. Definitely wondering.

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All right, so number nine, things that we do wrong in evangelism.

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We fail to define terms. We fail to define terms.

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And I don't mean like submission. God, you Dave, Dave, Dave. All right,

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David. Yes, Jonathan.

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Okay, we speak in Christianese, right?

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So what would some of those cliches be? Okay. I mean, if you're going to use a word like justification, should you expect your average unbeliever to understand it?

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Would it be wise if you're going to talk about justification to explain that? So would you probably have to understand it to explain it?

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Well, yeah.

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Grace. Grace is another one. No, no. I want to just focus on grace for a moment. Why would you have to explain grace to people?

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Yeah. Yeah. And so the

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Roman Catholic system, you get grace by doing stuff. Right. God gives you grace when you do

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X. You know, even talking about sin. Well, people,

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I mean, we've got this societal aversion to sin. We tell people that,

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I don't know, let's just take a pick. Homosexuality is sinful. I was born this way.

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I was born a sinner too. Right. Are they really? But, you know, Ronald McDonald has better branding.

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I mean, he's got an advertisement theme and big floppy shoes.

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Yeah, I mean, people don't even really understand, certainly don't understand. If you're going to talk to them about Jesus, do they even understand who

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Jesus is? Might you have to explain, you know, who he is and why he came to earth?

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Yes. I mean, these are things that are in the gospel. But if you just assume that when you throw out the Jesus word, people understand that they're going to fill it with whatever they want.

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You're talking to a Mormon. You say Jesus and who they think about. I'm not even going to say

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Lucifer's brother because, as I've said before, that's not the part that offends me. At least Lucifer is a supernatural being.

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Right. What offends me is that they teach that before we came to earth,

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I was Jesus's spiritual brother. I was his equal. And I'm like, you people are crazy.

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You have to explain that Jesus is truly God, that he's eternal. And, you know, so then you have to know some scriptures.

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Where would you tell somebody that, you know, Jesus is eternal? OK. John 1.

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In the beginning, the word was with God and the word was

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God. Right. John 8 .58. I mean, there are a lot of places. Before Abraham was.

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Yeah. John 8 .58. I mean, there are a number of places you can go to and you can say, you know, the Bible says that Jesus is eternal, that he's ever -existent.

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Colossians 1, where, you know, he created for him all things are created and through him, you know, they're all upheld.

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They all exist. You have to define sin.

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We talked about which, you know, again, all the things that the Bible says are sinful.

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They're all true. And people don't like it. And we've moved on. And that was 2000 years ago.

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And, you know, you've got to change with the times. And what's the answer to that? God doesn't change.

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He created us. He gave us his eternal word, not his, you know, 2000 year old word, his 6000 year old word.

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However, you know, old you want to make it. What's the expiration date on it?

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Well, you know, when God stops being, then God's truth will stop being and we will stop being.

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So I don't know why you'd root for that. We have to define terms in case we have maybe time for one more.

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Number 10. We fail to ask questions. We fail to ask questions of the people that we're trying to evangelize.

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I mean, I like to ask questions on Sunday mornings and Sunday school. Why? Because it engages you.

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Well, if you're evangelizing somebody and all you want to do is lecture them, then what happens? One way conversation, which is to say it is no conversation at all.

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I want people to engage with me. So what's a good question to ask an unbeliever? Okay.

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Do you believe in life after death? Heaven. How are you going to get to heaven? I mean, the killer question to me is always like.

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How are you going to get to heaven? Because when you ask that of people, you know, sometimes

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I don't care. You know, well, I have my church and I believe in my church.

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Okay. You have to listen and try to understand where they are. Right. So it is important to listen.

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You know, it's just like in class. I wanted to cut Corey off, so I just did it. But see now if you're looking for lifestyle evangelism, don't look to me.

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But it is important to listen. Why? Because we want to understand where they are.

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Okay. We want to understand if they're engaged with it. You know, I was about to say seriously engaged.

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It doesn't really matter. What matters is if they're engaged with what we're saying at all, we want to kind of understand where they are so that we can answer, again, any reasonable objections and maybe help them, give them new information that the

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Holy Spirit might, because that's what, you know, ultimately our objection is twofold. One is to preach

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Christ to them. And secondly, it's to trust the Holy Spirit to convict them of sin and cause them to be born again.

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But we have to present them enough information that that can even happen, Charlie. Right. I mean, that's a really rough one.

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And, you know, like let me just kind of amplify what Charlie's saying. You know, it's very helpful to know who you're talking to and to be sensitive to whatever kind of current or near current or even long past situations.

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You know, if you present the gospel in such a way where you say, they say, well, what about my husband?

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You know, he's a lifelong Roman Catholic, you know. Oh, well, he's in hell. You know, let's talk about you.

35:25

No, I mean, yeah, you're not going to give not your Bible that on that particular occasion.

35:32

Right. That's just not going to happen. Just a sec. But what you really want to do is to listen and to kind of, you know, be sensitive and still present the truth in a way that, you know, you have to be willing to offend to a point, but you don't want to go, you know, and just be offensive for the sake of being offensive.

35:57

Yes. Yes. Let Christ and his word be the offense, not you.

36:02

You're already offensive enough. Don't add to it. Yeah. Jonathan. Right. Everybody has biases and prejudice and, you know, understandings that they bring into a conversation.

36:16

And let me just kind of, I think this question, you know, we talked about openers.

36:23

You know, how do you get to heaven? And then listen to them. Right. And if it is an actual,

36:29

I mean, it's possible that you ask that question and then what? You know, you're talking to, you don't know this ahead of time, but you're talking to a pastor or, you know, just an informed layman at some church or whatever, and they immediately give you the gospel back.

36:45

What do you do? You know, you go, yes, absolutely. That's right. Okay. But that's not going to be the most common thing.

36:55

You're going to hear some, you know, some truth mixed in with a bunch of rubbish or just absolute rubbish coming back at you.

37:01

And so a good question is to say, what's the source for that? Why do you believe that?

37:09

Okay. And then you can respond to that because usually you're going to hear something like, well, you know, this is just what

37:15

I believe or, you know, that's what my church teaches or whatever.

37:21

And, you know, then you can sort of say, well, the Bible says, you know, go down that road, Janet. Yeah. I mean, that's a great point, you know, because people say, well,

37:33

I don't really want to go to heaven because all my friends aren't going to be there. So how could that possibly be heaven?

37:40

I don't want to go to heaven because my family's not going to be there. I mean, all the things that we prize so much when we die, they all,

37:50

I mean, God is God in control. Yes. Are things going, you know, is Claire going to walk down the aisle, whether Andrew walks down the aisle or not?

37:59

Yes. Although she might run down the aisle, you know. But, you know, it's like we think that if we're not there, somehow we're missing out on the reality is, you know, heaven is far better.

38:14

Yeah. Yeah. What would they say? You know, if they could come back, would they say, you know what?

38:20

Nah, join us. I mean, if we, and, you know, again, we have to close, but when we understand or when we define rightly, biblically, what hell is like, you know, but getting back to the family thing real quickly, because we do have to close, you know,

38:35

I would just say, I would like to talk to your family. You know, it would delight me right now.

38:43

I'm talking to you and, you know, you have a soul. And one day you're going to answer for what you believe about the

38:51

Lord Jesus Christ. And I just want to give you that information. So anyway, we have to close.

38:57

Father, thank you for this time. I thank you for those who are here in the engagement, the conversation that we've had.

39:05

Father, I pray that it's been helpful. I pray that you would stir us to love and good works, both by your word and your spirit.

39:14

Father, entrust us with the gospel. Press it upon us that we need to be evangelists.