The Duty and Beauty of Wives: Part 1

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The Duty and Beauty of Wives: Part 2

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What I'd like to do is cover the duty and the beauty of wives. I've named this section that because it deals with that.
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The duty and beauty of wives. I like what Brother Keith told me, beauty and the beast.
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That is so true. Our scripture text is found in our wonderful study in 1
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Peter chapter 3. And this is great. We've made it to chapter 3. This is really coming to the heart of the book.
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There's only 5 chapters and we're over halfway.
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And by God's help and grace. So 1 Peter chapter 3. Go with me there please.
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And we're going to look at verse 1 to 7. I first put 1 to 6.
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But actually if you look at the text, it does go to 1 to 7.
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As a whole, I was speaking submission in the home. And I want to include verse 7 as well because the husbands are included in this.
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As well as the wives. This is a very sensitive area like I said.
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And I need your prayers for me. As I preach this word this morning by the help and the power of the spirit of God.
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I'm reading from the NASB and hear the word of the living God. In the same way, you wives be submissive to your own husbands.
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So that even if any of them are disobedient to the word. They may be won without a word by the behavior of their wives.
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As they observe your chase and respectful behavior. Your adornment must not be merely external.
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Braiding of the hair and the wearing of gold jewelry. Or putting on dresses.
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But let it be the hidden person of the heart. With the imperishable quality.
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That means beauty. Imperishable or incorruptible beauty of a gentle and a quiet spirit.
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Which is precious in the sight of God. For in this way in former times the holy women also.
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Who hoped in God used to adorn themselves. Being submissive to their own husbands.
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Just as Sarah obeyed Abraham calling him Lord. And you have become her children.
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If you do what is right. Without being frightened by any fear.
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And he goes on to say. You husbands of the same way. Live with your wives in an understanding way.
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As with someone weaker. Since she is a woman. And show her honor.
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As a fellow heir of grace of life. So that your prayers will not be hindered.
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May God richly bless the reading of his holy word to our hearts this morning. This is quite a text isn't it?
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This is quite wonderful. This is great instructions to wives and husbands.
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In the faith of the Lord Jesus Christ. So now let's take this time just for a few minutes. Let's go to our
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Lord in prayer. As we seek his face. And as we study and worship him. And ask his blessing upon us.
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Our Father. And our God. Lord help us to reverence you.
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To respect you. Help us to submit to you oh God. In our hearts.
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Just not with our heads. Just not with our tongues. Lord it's our hearts. We call upon you in the name of the
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Lord Jesus Christ. And we ask your help in this. Father most of all we thank you for your eternal holy word.
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That is forever settled in heaven. Lord we cannot thank you enough for that word. Which you've given unto us.
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That wonderful revelation. Lord we don't need anything else.
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This word is sufficient for us. To live. Godly.
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In this evil world in which we live. And Lord I pray that you would help us to hear your voice. The voice of the good shepherd.
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The voice of the great shepherd. We thank you. For Jesus.
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Sanctify us. Oh Lord in thy word. Thy word is truth. It cleanses us.
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It washes us. It purifies us. Lord you're going to come back for a holy and a pure bride.
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May we be ready. May we be watching. May thy church be pure. Lord we ask you to give us ears to hear.
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Eyes to see. A heart to be submissive. To your authority. And receive it.
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As the good word of the Lord. And that we may obey your word. And we ask this all for the glory.
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Of the Father, the Son and the Holy Ghost. We ask this in Jesus name. Amen. A wonderful.
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As wonderful as marriage can be. It requires a lot of work.
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Doesn't it? It definitely requires. I've known this. As being married. For over 33 years.
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And I'm so thankful. To have found favor.
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In the Lord's eyes. To having a godly wife. I'm thankful for that. But it takes.
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A lot of love. God's love. To one another.
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In a way that honors God. And. Our spouse as well.
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The end of 1 Peter. Chapter 2 challenged us. As we looked at last
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Lord's day. To respond. In a God honoring way. When we are treated.
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Unfairly. As believers. But the key word that the apostle
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Peter. Seems to be driving at. In this entire complete section.
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Is the word submit. We must underscore that. That's a very important word.
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If we don't understand this word. Biblically. Truthfully. And if God does not.
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Drive this one word home. And granted it within our hearts. We will not understand.
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What he is saying to us. As husbands. As Christians. As wives.
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Here within this text. The word submit. Obey.
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In the Greek term has military roots. And we looked at this. But I want to repeat it. It means to fall in rank.
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Under the authority of another. To fall in rank. It's a military word.
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To fall in rank. Under the authority of another. To subject oneself to the purpose.
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Of obeying or pleasing another. Is another definition. And the apostle
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Peter. Tells us that such submission. Honors God. And advances his purposes.
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In this world. In which we live. Now biblical submission. Properly understood.
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We must understand this. Because the world sees opposite. Biblical submission. Is not a sign of weakness.
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Actually. It's reverse. It's a sign of great strength. The world sees it completely different.
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As I was studying this. Personally in my time. I like to share this with you. In first Peter chapter 3.
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As I asked myself this question. Why does the apostle Peter. Seem to spend so much time.
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And that's interesting. Let me say this. Before I say what is advancing.
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I'm getting ahead of myself. He was an apostle. That was married. We find that he had a mother -in -law.
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In the gospel. So we know he was married. And Jesus healed her from a fever.
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So he knows a lot about this. And the apostle Paul. Speaks of it. But he was not married.
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He was an unmarried apostle. But he speaks from the commandments of the Lord. But through the inspiration of the
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Holy Spirit. As I was thinking on this. Why would the apostle Peter. Devote six entire verses.
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To instruct wives. And only one verse. That is given in verse 7.
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To instruct husbands. That's a good question isn't it? And I thought about that. For a little bit. And I said what's the purpose of this?
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God's got to have a reason. And as I was meditating. And thinking about this. He says so much more.
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To the wives. And instructions here. Than to the husbands. And the conclusion.
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That I came up with. Is a biblical one. Now before I give you the answer. I believe is a biblical.
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Peter is not being a male chauvinistic. Pig. As some people would say.
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And I looked that word up. And it was interesting. That it's a term that emerged. Really in the late 1960's.
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In the late 1960's. During the sexual revolution. Among the feminists. That term male chauvinistic.
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Pig. Came into being. Things started really turning wrong.
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For this nation. For this now. We see the results of it among us. It's everywhere isn't it?
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And this message would not go over too well. In this post modern culture. Would it? And hey.
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Would it go over very well in most churches? No it wouldn't. But the reason
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I believe. Personally. And biblically. That so much attention.
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Is given to the instruction of wives. Is because the wife. Is a type of the believer.
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Of Jesus Christ. As the church. And I really believe.
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That's. We're going to see that more. As the apostle Paul brings this out. In Ephesians chapter 5.
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The woman. The wife is to submit. Or subject herself under her head. Being her own husband.
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As Jesus Christ is the head of the bride. The church. It's that plain and simple.
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So she submits to his authority. Now that doesn't go over too well.
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To even wives. Only a true believer. In Jesus Christ.
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Can really. Take this from the heart. And submit to the heart. From the heart.
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Therefore it is of supreme importance. For the believers to follow this. God ordained order.
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And submit to Christ's authority. You hear me say that quite often. Because that is really the root.
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That is the foundation. Of everything that Peter is saying here. That Paul says.
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It's all about submitting to the authority. Of Christ. And I tell you that is critical.
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That is absolutely foundational. To everything.
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That we believe. As believers. Within the church. So no matter how.
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Often we read this text. That you go through it. We come out the same.
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Don't we? We find this text is always focusing. On one phrase.
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Be submissive to your own husbands. Be submissive to your own husbands.
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The old King James. Version says. Be in subjection. To your own husbands. The Phillips version renders it.
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Adapt yourself to your husbands. The new English Bible. Says accept the authority.
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Of your husbands. And the ESV. Which is more of a recent translation.
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That says. The English standard version. Be subject to your own husbands. And all of them are interpreting.
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One word in the Greek. Which literally means. To stand under. To fall in rank. Under the authority of another.
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And to take. The position. Under the leadership of your husbands. That's what he's saying. Let me make this clear.
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Early in this message. In my introduction here. That this does not mean. A tyrant slave relationship.
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I want to make that crystal clear. There is no tyrant slave relationship here. Holy scripture clearly indicates.
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Otherwise. Especially in the word to the husbands. As we will see more. Lord willing next week.
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But it does mean that the wife is. Willingly not reluctantly. To abide by the husbands final decisions.
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When it comes. To home manners. And in the family. In the home making those decisions.
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The late preacher Ray Stedman said this. In an illustration. I really love his illustrations.
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He says this. The necessity of the wife. To submit. Herself to the husbands authority.
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Has been blown up. To undue proportions. Dwelling on the aspect of it.
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Is like disliking roses. Because they have thorns. That's a good illustration.
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And he goes on to say. They also are very beautiful. And have a delightful fragrance.
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Or perhaps more to the point. It is like that. First dive.
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Into a cool water. On a hot summer day. There is a moment of discomfort.
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While the body is adjusting. To the temperature of the water. But then there is a glorious relaxation.
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And a refreshment. Of the swim. That's well said. Amen. Good illustration to give us.
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As we dive into this text. Especially to wives. Now so the first thing.
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Is that. The submissiveness here. Is absolutely necessary. Because this is
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God's. Divine order. In scripture. We see this in Genesis. That's God's word.
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This is the way God ordered it. It's his creative order. And sins mess things up.
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That three letter word. Sin. Has really. Caused chaos.
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It is God's. Creative order. That the man might be the man. We need this so often.
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So much in our day. It is the husband's. Responsibility in marriage. To exercise.
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And I want to say this. And this is a term I always use. Servant leadership.
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Not the other way around. It's always servant first. Servant leadership.
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This is exactly. The way our Lord Jesus Christ. Walked among us.
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And showed and demonstrated. His servanthood. Even washing the disciples feet.
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But he was the master. Even the master. Would wash their feet. Even the master would set the example.
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And he set us the ultimate example. For humility didn't he? Servant leadership. And someone has very precisely.
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And wisely pointed out. In a very simple way. Almost like brother Keith's illustration.
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About the young boy. Showing up the. Professional fisherman.
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He knew what he was doing. And his humility. And he really didn't know it. He wasn't bragging about it.
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He just did what he did. But one wise person said it like this. Speaking of.
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Marriage. Between a husband and wife. Quote. When two people are on a horse.
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One has to get. To be behind. Let me say that again. When two people are on a horse.
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One has got to be behind. In other words you can't have two leaders.
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You can't have two leaders. And you can't have two followers. One has to be the leader. One has to be the follower.
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Now. In marriage. One must follow. One must lead.
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That's what we're going to look at. My points of this. I'm going to bring out four points. Under a heading.
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The heading is submission in the home. Submission in the home. I would like for us to follow this.
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And I'm going to just break it up in two parts. Two of them will be today. Lord willing.
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And Lord willing. The other two will be next week. The first is found.
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In verse one and two. And my first point. I would like for us to look at.
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Is the heart of a godly wife. The heart of a godly wife. Secondly.
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We will look at. Verse three and four. The true beauty of a godly woman.
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The true beauty of a godly woman. And last. And after we look at those.
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Two headings. We will look at some practical applications. In a very simplistic way.
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But. And to the meaning of the verses. In which we will look at. Next Lord's Day.
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We will look at. The third. Third point will be some examples.
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Found in Holy Scripture. From the Old Testament. Of godly women. Holy women of old. Who trusted in God.
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And then on the fourth point. Will be verse seven. Will be the heart of a godly man.
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We need to see the heart of a godly man. Don't we? A godly husband. And then we will look at application.
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As the Lord tarries for that. So let us begin today. And look at the text. Before us as we look into this study.
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Submission in the home. Submission in the home. The beauty and the beauty of wives. We have it in the home.
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And this is exactly where Satan attacks. I think the hardest. His cross hairs are.
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Set right in the home. Beloved. And he always wants to get to the.
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The head. Of the home. To break up the home. And he does it a lot of times.
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Through the wives. So that's another reason. I believe the woman is the weaker vessel. And it's not to say.
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You hear me say this. Wives. That you are not inferior. You are an heir of grace.
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To your husband. You have a very important part to play. In God's redemptive plan.
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So submission in the home. The heart of a godly wife. The heart of a godly wife. How does this look like? Well let's hear what
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Peter says. Look at verse 1 and 2. In the same way or likewise. You wives be submissive to your own husbands.
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So that even if any of them. Are disobedient to the word. Speaking of.
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Of. Unsaved husbands. They may be won.
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Without a word. By what? By preaching to them? By lecturing to them? No. By the behavior of their wives.
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And then he says in verse 2. As they observe. Your chaste. And respectful.
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Behavior. It's a loaded gun isn't it? That's a powerful verse. The godly wife will be submissive to her own husband.
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The submissive. The submission isn't a reward for the husband. Because he's been good.
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She doesn't. Submit because ok one day he's good. And then ok you're going to be bad. I'm not going to submit.
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Rather it is the proper order of the home. That god commands it. That's the reason why.
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God commands submission. Now god has the ultimate authority here. He is the creator.
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And. The wives are to submit. To their own husbands. Rather it's the proper order isn't it?
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Now. Question. The very simple obvious question is. Why has god commanded it?
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Well first of all. The obvious answer is. Because god is god. God is the creator.
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He is god. And the second is. In his infinite wisdom. He knows.
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That this is the very best arrangement. For the home. I don't think anyone else would know better.
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Since he's the creator. He is the one that created. Male and female. And his own image.
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And let me throw this. I heard this years ago. Before the LGBTQ movement came out.
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God created Adam and Eve. Not Adam and Steve. That still stands. But I'm not going to go there.
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We're going to. Focus on what Peter is saying. Now. More about that later.
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Right? That just shows you that satan has caused chaos. And has disrupted.
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The. Order in which god. Has designed. And we can't blame it all on satan.
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Even though he's the deceiver. And he's lured people in with the temptation. It's our sin. Sin is the problem.
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That's the problem. And people are blinded to it. Well. Aren't you glad for the great revelation in scripture.
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That god gives us. That we can see this. It's the word of god. Now. Submission or subjection does not mean.
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That the wife is inferior to the husband. I just said that. I'm going to say that time and time again. Because the wives are not to be inferior.
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Actually 1 Peter 3 .7 says this. And I read it. But you husbands. Likewise. Or in the same way.
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Live with your wives in an understanding way. As with someone weaker.
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Since she is a woman. Show her honor. As a fellow heir of the grace.
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Of life. So that your prayers. Will not be hindered. Now.
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Like I said ladies first. Men we're going to get it next week. But I am going to say a few things.
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In context. Here. Even though it's addressing the wives.
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First. And he says so much in six verses. But there is a great.
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Important part. That the husband plays. As well. In the role of marriage.
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Don't we all need this. I need to hear this. Submission has to do with order.
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Not evaluation. For example. Let me give you an example here.
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Slaves in the average Roman household. In the New Testament time. Were superior in many ways.
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To their masters. But they still had. To be under the authority.
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Of their masters. In other words. That's the way it was. Another more modern.
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Illustration. A little buck private. And the army may be a better person. Than the five star general that's leading.
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He may be. But. He's still a buck private. He's still under the authority.
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Of that five star general. That's the way it is. Now it makes me think about Jesus here.
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Jesus actually. Was God in the flesh. God in the flesh.
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Became a bond servant. He chose to do this. And his humility.
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He submitted to the will of God. Actually the verse I'm thinking of. Is Philippians chapter 2. Verse 5 through 8.
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You can go with me there if you like. But it's a great text isn't it? Philippians.
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Chapter 2. Verse 5 through 8. The apostle Paul says. Have this attitude in yourselves.
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There's the attitude. What's the attitude? The attitude. The humility of Christ. Then he says.
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Which was also in Christ Jesus. Who although he existed in the form of God. He did not regard equality with God.
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A thing to be grasped. But emptied himself. Oh my.
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That's the great kenosis. He emptied himself. Taking the form of a bond slave.
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A bond slave. And being made in the likeness of men. Being found in the appearance as a man.
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He humbled himself. By becoming obedient. That word obedient could be submissive.
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Submissive. To the point of death. Even the death on a cross. The kenosis.
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The great doctrine of Christ. Is self emptying in his incarnation. Taking the form of a bond servant.
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A bond servant. But what did Jesus do? He submitted himself to the father's will. He submitted to go into the cross.
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This was a command that the father gave. He lovingly. Willingly. Sacrificed himself.
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And submitted himself to the point. As being like a bond slave. God in the flesh.
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God in the flesh. What an example. At submitting himself to the father's will.
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There's nothing degrading. There's nothing degrading. About submitting to authority. Is there?
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Jesus set that example. Or even accepting God's order. For that way of thinking.
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If anything. It is. It's the first step toward fulfillment. Why is this foreign to us?
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Because. Submissive. Is a dirty word.
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In our culture. It's because of the sin in people's hearts. Do not want to hear this.
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Just as holiness is foreign. To sinners. This is just as foreign. But we need to hear it.
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Well it's the first step. Toward fulfillment. Notice the first words. In the same way. Likewise.
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That means proper submission in the home. Follows the same principles. As submission is towards the government. Toward our employers.
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There is a pattern in which Peter gives. And that's submission under authority. That's what he's talking about.
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It is the submission. Not only of actions. But of the heart. That demonstrates.
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To us. What Peter is really talking about. And it is demonstrated by the
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Lord Jesus Christ. We looked at that last Lord's day. In 1 Peter 2. Verse 21 -25.
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So Jesus set us the example. Now we have a call for submission. And that call for submission.
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Is not merely a call. For just love. And considerate action.
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It's a call. To take the place of submission. Now. In order to take the place of submission.
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That is a humbling act. Isn't it? And that's what hits our pride.
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And I really believe this. That pride is. The one sin.
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That keeps us. And draws us back from submission. It is.
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That's why. It speaks in Philippians. That's why I read that. It's the humility of Jesus.
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And He submitted to the Father's will. People say, yeah, but He was
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God in the flesh. Well, yes He was. But He was also the God man. And all that He did.
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He did as a man full of the Holy Spirit. And He set that example. Now. The word literally again.
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It means falling in the rank to authority. Literally meaning to order under. Yet submission to authority can be totally consistent.
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With equality. And importance. This is hard for us to understand.
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But it could be consistent with equality. And importance. And dignity and honor.
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And this is where Peter goes. Peter goes in this direction. Again, Jesus. When He was a child.
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Growing up. He was in subjection or submission. Under His parents authority, wasn't He? And most important.
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He was in subjection. And under submission to God the Father. But He also demonstrated this.
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As a child. Being under the submission of. His parents. Commentator Wayne Grudem said this.
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Thus the command to wives. To be subject to their own husbands. Should never be taken to imply.
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Inferior personhood. Or spirituality or lesser importance. End quote. Now of course.
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Submission in marriage follows. Same principles as submission in other spheres. As I mentioned.
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God's appointed authority. Is that our obligation before God? It's a command of God.
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Unless that authority directs us to sin. We looked at that, didn't we? If that authority.
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In government. Under government authorities. Directs us to sin. And go against the word of God.
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We are to say no. In that case. It is right and better to obey God. Rather than men.
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We looked at examples of that. Through scripture. Acts chapter 4. We went to Daniel.
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We went to other examples. We know where we stand there. In the same way
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Peter says. Likewise. Wise. Be submissive to your own husbands. Again. Women are not inferior to men in any way.
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So in marriage. The holy matrimony. Two people becoming one. Mingled together.
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Isn't that a great miracle? That God does in marriage. They become one under the covenant of God.
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That God established. That God is the one that created marriage.
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Go with me to Ephesians chapter 5. And this is a very important passage of scripture.
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I believe for us. Ephesians 5. Now Paul the apostle here.
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Isn't it wonderful? He is a single apostle. And you got Peter the apostle.
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Almost saying somewhat the same thing in a different way. But it's still the Holy Spirit. The same
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Holy Spirit that directs them to say these words. Notice what the apostle Paul says in verse 21.
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He sets the foundation of the our submission as believers under the authority of Jesus Christ in verse 21.
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He says this. And be subject to one another in the fear of Christ.
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That's the foundation. Verse 22 Wives. He addresses wives first.
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There's a reason for this. This is God the Holy Spirit that directed the apostle
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Peter the same way. Paul says wives be subject to your own husbands.
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The word own is important. Peter says the same thing. It means not to other men.
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This is your own husband. Him alone. As to the
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Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife. As Christ also is the head of the church.
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He himself being the savior of the body. But as the church is subject to Christ so also the wives ought to be to their husbands in everything.
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It's powerful words. Husbands are not left out.
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Look at verse 25. Husbands love your wives just as Christ also loved the church and gave himself up for her.
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That's a strong love. That's convicting to me as a husband because that's the kind of love
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I should show to my wife. The kind of love that Jesus showed toward his church. His people.
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His bride. So that he might sanctify her. There's the purpose. He sanctifies her.
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Having cleansed her. He cleansed her. Past tense. By the washing of the water with the word.
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That he might present to himself the church in all her glory. Having no spot or wrinkle or any such thing.
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But that she would be holy and blameless. That's the purpose. So husbands ought also to love their own wives.
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As their own bodies. And he who loves his own wife loves himself. For no one ever hated his own flesh but nourishes it and cherishes it just as Christ also does the church.
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Because we are members of his body. And then he gives us a scripture from Genesis for this reason.
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A man shall leave his father and mother and shall be joined to his wife and the two shall become one flesh.
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This mystery is great. But I'm speaking with reference to church to Christ and the church.
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Nevertheless each individual among you also is to love his own wife even as himself and the wife must see to it that she respects her husband.
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Strong words isn't it? Powerful, high words. Jesus desires a pure bride.
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And that's the way it is as us husbands is to love our wives we are not to lead her into anything sinful.
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We are to lead her to purity. To lead her to purity. To lead her to holiness.
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And that is loving purity. Love does that. And why? To cleanse her. To have her cleansed.
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That's what Jesus is coming after is a cleansed a holy bride.
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And here is that mystery see within the covenant holy matrimony between a husband and a wife the joining of the two become one.
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That's the way it is with Jesus Christ and the believer. Isn't that glorious? It's glorious.
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But he speaks about the purpose there. Now let me head on. I wish
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I could stay there and preach right there on that text that's another time. But let's go back to Peter. Now Peter is speaking very much about what
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Paul is saying there. So Peter carefully observed that wives are called to submit to their own husbands.
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Right? And not to all men to their own husbands. I love that.
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To their own husbands. Your own wives. Husbands are to love their own wives.
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One woman, man. One man woman. Get it right.
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Peter goes on to say so that even if any of them are disobedient speaking about the unsaved husband.
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This is a tough one because there are some women that marry unsaved men.
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Back in this time period it was very rampant and it was very well known in that time period.
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Then he says they may be one without a word. Without a word by the behavior of their wives.
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How can this happen? Well we'll look at this the opportunity is great isn't it? Here's an opportunity for a godly wife it's a benefit of submission that is shown in the way that it affects the husbands for God.
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Now I want to pause here to say it sometimes in some cases it doesn't always go this way.
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But I'm not going to chase that rabbit right now. I'm going to just stay right to the text that gets more into other situations that happens.
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I'm not going to go there. But in a culture here in which women were viewed as lower than men still that happens today doesn't it?
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Men look down at women as being stupid and so forth and say you just submit to me.
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That's a tyrant. Scripture does not back that up.
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As a matter of fact God is not pleased with that. But in this place here
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Peter uses it as a powerful spiritual influence in the home for this godly wife to be submissive to a ungodly husband.
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What's more powerful than a holy life folks? What's more effective than a godly woman that's trusting
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God? It's her faith and her obedience that can accomplish great things for God without a word.
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Without a word. Now I looked this up and studied this what does it mean without a word?
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It doesn't mean without the word of God. It means without preaching and lecturing.
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It means without preaching down his throat. Because the word of God is what brings salvation right?
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According to John 5 24 and Romans 10 17 faith comes by hearing and hearing by the word of God the word of God is what brings salvation so the word of God has to come.
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But it's her godly, that's her beauty her godly character and Peter goes in this direction.
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So it does mean without talk without talk. Now some wives may be tempted to try to shape their husbands either by guiding them to Christ by preaching like I said or lecturing but that's not what the text says.
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The text here says the wisdom of God through the apostle Peter that they may be one without a word by their behavior, by their conduct.
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Holy conduct godly conduct through godly submission chaste conduct, a holy life in the fear of God.
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Here it is the character and the conduct of the wife that will win the lost husband this is simply for her as she trusts
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God through her godly submission and how does this look like?
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Well he goes on, he says this in verse 2 as they observe your chaste and respectful behavior, as they observe this not by arguments but a godly attitude attitudes of submission understanding loving, being kind patient.
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These are qualities that are not manufactured right? We know those qualities what about the fruit of the spirit?
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I believe that's the most powerful evidence of a godly wife or a godly man for that matter that come when we are submitted to Jesus Christ and his authority and to one another it's never 50 -50 in a marriage,
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I heard this years ago and it convicted me, I said it's not a 50 -50 deal as most people say it's 50 here and 50 there, it's 100 -100
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I'm here to tell you both have to put their all into it and as we do it before the
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Lord and there's where it comes down to we must do it as before the Lord we must do it with an attitude as we do it unto
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Christ that makes all the difference in the world the husband being the servant leader unto his wife, ministering to her helping her, and by the way it means to beautify her to beautify her in the
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Lord, as we read in Ephesians 5 25 -30 it basically means that she is to be beautified, that's what
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Jesus is doing to his believers, his church he is beautifying us he's purifying us he desires to have a bride without spot, without wrinkle, a pure bride, he desires the purity of his bride more than anything else and he shares his holiness with us by the way, the scripture says we're partakers of his holiness isn't that glorious?
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and the Christian wife must encourage her husband, by the way she is to be the encourager and help him grow strong in the
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Lord now this leads me to our next point, the last point is the true beauty of a godly woman, the true beauty of a godly woman in verse 3 and 4 notice what it says your adornment must not be merely external braiding the hair wearing the gold jewelry or putting on dresses women love doing those things we're gonna touch on that verse 4, but let it be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable or incorruptible quality or beauty of a gentle and a quiet spirit which is precious in the sight of God what a word now
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I wanna say this here we see God's commentary on how true beauty looks like this is convicting the true beauty of a godly woman it's internal it's her character this is
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God's version of true beauty God's version of true beauty, now I was thinking about this you know
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God doesn't desire you to go about and throw out your makeup and be a plain
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Jane, externally I heard one preacher say this years ago and it still rings in my head he was speaking to a lady,
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I said boy he's really he's in dangerous territory talking about these things, but he said ladies if you wanna paint the barn please paint it, and I thought wow, he's gonna be in some serious trouble but anyway,
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I have to agree with him externally, you know us guys, we want to see a beautiful woman externally you know something,
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Peter is not saying throw out the baby with the bathroom actually listen to what he says, notice it very closely what
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Peter is saying through the spirit of God is a submission to God and to their own husbands first a submission to God and to their own husbands speaking to the wives and the word ornament ornament is a very good word or adornment ornament, adornment it's translated adorning and it's the
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Greek word cosmos in the Greek it gives us the
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English word cosmos and what does cosmos mean the ordered universe
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God wants to bring order you know that's where the word cosmetic comes from bring some order bring some order interesting to note that it's opposite of chaos
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God wants to bring order now this is interesting, God desires order, sin has brought chaos but for the godly woman the outward adornment is always in moderation, we know that it's never to be way too much or too little
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I believe there is a balance and he doesn't say throw out the cosmetics it's in moderation but the emphasis is really here on the inward adornment, that's what
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God is talking about that's what Peter is talking about it's the inward beauty it's the inward beauty before God that's what
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God sees in other words the Christian wives were not to major on the external decorations but rather the internal character that's what he is saying don't major on the external matter of fact a lot of women would major more on the internal than the external we'll be going a long way in godliness won't we he's not saying throw out the baby with the bathwater like I said it comes to adornment but he's saying true inward beauty but is her internal character and her true beauty is her being chaste and reverent and Christlike before God that's what he's saying your adornment must not be merely external he didn't say throw it out completely did he?
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so we know that so ladies don't give up the make up but there's three things he does there's three things that he does mention here number one the braiding of the hair number two the wearing of gold jewelry number three putting on dresses now all husbands and men like to see women that has braided hair and wearing gold jewelry and putting on dresses that's what we think is precious but what does
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God see precious that's what we should be concerned about right there is a place for the external and the right perspective it is but what's most important is the internal that's what counts notice here this verse all of these adornments are external the braiding of the hair the wearing of gold jewelry putting on dresses that's all external what people see that's what we see with our eyes that's what appeals now again
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Peter again is not forbidding the wearing of jewelry and braiding of the hair and wearing nice dresses he's not but he is saying it is that the true beauty must be at all levels not just the physical just not the physical now we know the world focuses just on the physical they use women for the love of money oh my goodness all you gotta do is cut the
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TV on and you see this on commercials and so forth and women is just put out there and used as bait to bring even selling cars and selling this and selling that even food commercials it's sad and they pay these women big money for this because they got good looks external put it out there they gotta see something that would help us gain money that's the way the world is every woman needs to know that her beauty is to be expected and to contribute her life must be her beauty must be on all levels but here is where God is different than the world inward it's what
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God sees that's what we gotta look at her inward beauty is her most attractiveness of all
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I wanna say that to you ladies as a pastor that really loves you that is your most beautiful attractiveness is your inward beauty your inward beauty shines more than anything her inward beauty is to be more even more beautiful than her physical attractiveness and you can be beautiful in the outside but you're more beautiful in the inside isn't that the way
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God sees it? you know you're not gonna hear that too much from this world they wanna see your external beauty but they don't wanna see they don't care about your internal beauty and can
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I tell you this women have great power in the sense of beauty they can use their beauty look at Delilah she was a prostitute and she trapped the strongest man in that time period look at the wisest man that ever lived it was one of his downfalls but you see women have great power in this but let me say this in a loving way your real power does not lie in your seductiveness of outward beauty your real power lies in your inner beauty as a child of God the real beauty is your internal person before God notice again verse 4 but let it be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable quality beauty of a gentle and a quiet spirit which is precious in the sight of God in the sight of God reminds me of 1st
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Samuel chapter 16 verse 7 you know this verse but the Lord said to Samuel now this is referred to King Saul granted but this is the way
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God sees us men and women right? he sees the soul he sees the heart listen to what he said do not look at his appearance or at the height of his stature but I have rejected him
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God says I have rejected him for God does not see as man sees since man looks at the outward appearance but the
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Lord looks at the heart that's what God looks at God looks at the heart how does your heart look before God?
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how does your soul look before God? what is the size of your soul? is your soul attractive to God?
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is it beautiful in the sight of God? does it have a gentle and a quiet spirit before God?
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what kind of character do you have? beauty that will never decay the outward is going to fade away reminds me of a flower once again you see a beautiful flower and eventually that flower fades and decays and falls away a rose will a beautiful as the rose is will eventually decay and the petals will fall off and it's gone but what's going to last?
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your inward soul your inward beauty a gentle quiet spirit which is very precious in the sight of God my time is almost gone we got to hurry true beauty is in the eyes of the beholder and our great beholder is
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God himself he sees all things alright that's convicting well these godly character traits are not promoted for women by our wicked culture naturally right naturally you don't expect you know these internal beauties it's the external is what they look at yet they are very precious in the sight of God F .B.
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Meyer said this plenty are there whose outward body is richly decked but whose inner being is clothed in rags whilst others whose garments are worn and threadbare are all glorious within well said well it reminds me of Proverbs 31 go with me to Proverbs 31 very quickly read the commentary that Solomon had on the woman that has had inward beauty look at Proverbs 31
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I want to just read through it starting at verse 10 an excellent wife who can find for her worth is far above jewels the heart of her husband trust in her and he will have no gain
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I'm sorry no lack of gain she does him good and not evil all the days of her life she looks for wool and flax and works with her hands in delight she is like the merchant ships she brings her food from afar she rises also while it is still night and gives food to her household and portions to her maidens she considers a field and buys it from her earnings she plants a vineyard she girds herself with strength notice this inward beauty strength makes her arms strong she senses that her gain is good her lamp does not go out at night she stretches out her hands to the distaff and her hands grasp the spindle she extends her hand to the poor and she stretches out her hands to the needy she cares she's a caring wife verse 21 she is not afraid of the snow of her household for all her household are clothed with scarlet she's a hard working godly woman she makes coverings for herself her clothing is fine linen and purple her husband is known in the gates she really praises her husband and when he sits among the elders of the land she makes linen garments and sells them and supplies belts to the tradesmen notice here again verse 25 notice this strength and dignity that's inner beauty that's character that's her clothing she wears it everyday that's what she is everyday before god strength and dignity and she smiles at the future she doesn't fear the future cause she trusts in god right verse 26 she opens her mouth in wisdom and the teaching of kindness is on her tongue what a godly woman listen to this she looks well to the ways of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness she's never idle her children rise up and bless her her husband also and he praises her saying what is he saying many daughters have done nobly but you excelled them all what a praise charm is deceitful and beauty is vain listen to the wise
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Solomon but a woman who fears the lord she shall be praised give her the product of her hands and let her work praise and her works praise her in the gates and there you have true holiness the virtue inner beauty of what the apostle
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Peter is talking about with a godly wife very quickly let me give you an application looking at this old world in which we live in with all of its sham and its emptiness and its glittering facades of hallow lives do you know anything that is more short supplied than the beauty of the spirit you don't say it often do you what a challenge to women what a challenge to women so vital a matter is this so uniquely is the woman's role still the problem we all face is in three words sin why do you say that pastor because after the fall in genesis chapter 3 god first cursed the serpent second he cursed the woman and then he cursed
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Adam the curse came upon us because of sin and this is what scripture says in genesis 3 verse 16 one verse listen to this and to the woman
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God said I will greatly multiply your pain in childbirth in pain you will bring your fourth children yet your desire will be for your husband and he will rule over you now let me give you
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Pastor John MacArthur's notes on this I thought was very interesting it fits exactly what we're saying he says this just as the woman and her seed will engage in a war with the serpent
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Satan and his seed in verse 15 because of sin and the curse the man and the woman will face struggles in their own relationships is that so true that's the problem it's sin notice again what he says because of sin and the curse the man and the woman even
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Christians will face struggles in their own relationship sin has turned the harmonious system of God ordained roles into distasteful struggles of self will lifelong companies
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I'm sorry lifelong companions husbands and wives will need
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God's help in getting along as a result can I get amen there he goes on to say the woman's desire will be to lord it over her husband this is what sin has done but the husband will rule by divine design that's what
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Paul was basically saying in Ephesians chapter 5 right end quote
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I thought that was a quote that's well worth us talking about that but the answer, what's the answer submission, submission to submission submission to God submit therefore to God we drive this home,
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Jesus gave us the greatest example of submission you see submission all through the scriptures let me close with a story by Jill Brisco on submission,
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I don't know if you've ever heard of Jill Brisco she's a godly woman her husband was
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Stewart Brisco, preacher of the gospel years back and we've been looking at what submission is but you know something in this story right here
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Jill Brisco talks about what submission isn't I think this gives us a proper balance doesn't it, listen to this she talks about the difference between her family and her husband
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Stewart Brisco and Stewart's family and what that brought to her own marriage and her own marriage and I think this can really relate to all of us but especially to wives here she says this my father was a quiet gentleman considered himself head of his home protector, defender and provider my mom was a sweet Scottish born
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Presbyterian she believed in the sovereignty of God in her husband my father adorned my mother but his considerable business assets into her name he put his considerable business assets into her name and looked to her to raise the children when my sister came of age my father supported her when she became an excellent car mechanic and raced cars quite a woman huh quite a daughter
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I should say eventually she took her place at his side as partner in his successful car business something else
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Stewart's family was strict on the other hand he came from a very strict home conservative, evangelical his father was an elder in a small local assembly of believers and he took seriously his rule to the household well he considered himself the authority of his family while his wife a bright, articulate, efficient lady considered herself in subjection to her husband in everything carrying those convictions to her dress her hairstyle and her silence in the presence of men at church newly converted
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Jill says at the College of Cambridge having just been introduced to Stewart's family
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Jill says this I remember wondering greatly about the amazing mold of doing things and I sensed an unconscious frustration
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I think women you can relate to that an unconscious frustration of unexplored desires and frustrated gifts in my mother -in -law it was as if those gifts sat meekly inside her with eyes downcast and wearing a hat and she goes on in that moment as a new believer
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Jill says this I believe I stumbled on an important truth an important truth of what submission isn't and she's turning the spotlight on herself submission isn't sitting down on the outside while you're standing up on the inside oh my, can we catch that truth?
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submission isn't sitting down on the outside while you're standing up on the inside that's convicting when we submit to God are we doing it because we love our
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Lord and we're under His authority wives have this kind of heart this is the kind of truth that must be caught rather than taught what kind of behaviors do you show?
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do you show a submissive heart or do you show are you showing what kind of behaviors are you showing are you showing an unsubmissive heart or a submissive heart beloved, this is how
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God has designed the church and how God has designed marriage to submit under His authority willingly not while we're standing up on the inside but we sitting down we're sitting down not on the outside while we're standing up on the inside, that's all wrong it comes down to our submission to God, amen?
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our submission to God, our attitude our heart motives let me leave you with this scripture sweet surrender,
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Lord help us Romans 12, 1 and 2 I beseech you therefore brethren by the mercies of God that you present your bodies as a living sacrifice holy, acceptable
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God which is your reasonable service which is your reasonable service and do not be conformed to this world but be you transformed by the renewing of your mind that you may prove what is that good and acceptable perfect will of God let us pray
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Father we thank you for this word before us Lord it's such a critical topic for all of us just not for wives but for husbands as well for all believers it comes right down to help us to look at the
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Lord Jesus Christ as he submitted in the Garden of Gethsemane as he was facing your wrath three times three times he wrestled with it not my will but thy will be done sweet submission sweet submission help us
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Lord, help us Lord in this help us to take this truth to our homes help us to be truly submissive to you help us help each and every one of us that hears this message oh
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God to be truly submissive to you willingly not standing up on the inside but sitting down bowing before your presence willingly help us by your