- 00:00
- I was just thinking about that song we were singing just a moment ago, and it has the line, and we exist to bring you pleasure,
- 00:06
- O God. Want to think about that? That's why we exist, to give God pleasure. He might delight in us like a father delights in his children.
- 00:15
- So we're going to continue worshipping now by preaching the Word and you listening to the Word. We are going to delight in God's goodness towards us, and we trust now that He will be delighted in this message and in your attentive listening.
- 00:31
- You know you worship while you listen to a sermon, did you know that? So I hope
- 00:36
- God is delighted in this message because of its adherence to the text, and I don't know if it helps you as a congregation or not, but I'm glad when you like sermons.
- 00:46
- It is good for my heart and soul, but I'm not preaching for you, and if all of you hate the message today, but it's biblical,
- 00:53
- I'll be able to sleep well. And so I love this church because you want what's taught in the
- 01:00
- Bible, and accept nothing less. I have a question for you, comes straight from the
- 01:07
- Bible. If thou, Lord, should mark iniquities, who could stand?
- 01:14
- If God counts sin, if God knows exactly what you've done in terms of not loving
- 01:20
- Him with all your heart, soul, mind, and strength, and not loving your neighbor as yourself, if God notices those things and marks those iniquities, who could stand in His holy presence?
- 01:30
- Answer? No one could. But Psalm 130 verse 3 is not the end of the
- 01:36
- Psalm, verse 4 says this, and it is music to our ears, but there is forgiveness with thee that thou mayest be feared.
- 01:47
- We serve a God who does mark iniquities, He knows all the iniquities, and then for His people,
- 01:53
- His chosen ones, He condemns Jesus, His Son, in our place, and grants us forgiveness.
- 02:01
- If you'll turn your Bibles to Matthew chapter 6, please, we're working through the book of Matthew, the
- 02:06
- Sermon on the Mount, inch by inch, foot by foot, meter by meter, and we're working through the
- 02:13
- Lord's Prayer at the moment, and of course, the last two times, we've looked at, forgive us our debts as we have forgiven our debtors, petition number 5, found in Matthew chapter 6, verse 12.
- 02:25
- But I want to stop in our series of going through, the bulletin might say, it's lead us not into temptation, but I don't want to get there yet, because forgiveness is so vital,
- 02:36
- I want to make sure we all understand what the Bible teaches about forgiveness, because I believe John MacArthur is right.
- 02:42
- He said, nothing in the Christian life is more important than forgiveness. Our forgiveness of others, and God's forgiveness of us.
- 02:52
- John goes on to say, forgiveness. Nothing is more foreign to sinful human nature, and nothing is more characteristic of divine grace.
- 03:03
- Isn't that wonderful? When you think about God, it is God's goodness, God's nature to forgive, and when you think about our nature, our fallen nature, it's not in our capacity even to forgive, and so we want to just sit and camp for a while on this topic of forgiveness.
- 03:19
- Tom Bertrand looked at me and he said, what's the word for the day? Because the kids count how many times I say this word, and so the word for the day is forgiveness.
- 03:26
- That we could be forgiven by God, and that we could then forgive other people. And certainly in context, if you look at Matthew chapter 6, verse 1,
- 03:35
- Jesus doesn't want us to act like the Pharisees, and the scribes, and the false teachers of the day.
- 03:41
- He didn't want his disciples to do it then, and he doesn't want us to do it now. Beware, warning people, beware of practicing your righteousness before men to be noticed by them.
- 03:52
- Otherwise, you have no reward with your Father who is in heaven. And the key to understand the
- 03:57
- Sermon on the Mount is, God is a Father. He's a good Father. He's a transcendent Father.
- 04:03
- He's an intimate Father. And we relate to God, because Christ has redeemed us. We relate to God as a child relates to their
- 04:11
- Father. And so when we give our money, we don't give our money in a hypocritical way, because he's our
- 04:20
- Father. When we pray, we don't pray with hypocrisy, because he's our Father. And we don't fast that way either.
- 04:26
- So Jesus says, forgive us our debts as we have forgiven our debtors, Matthew chapter 6, verse 12.
- 04:32
- This week I've received some questions about forgiveness, and so if you'd like an outline for this morning, the outline is questions and answers about forgiveness.
- 04:41
- My purpose this morning is very simple, is to get you to think more clearly about forgiveness, and so you'll be able to, by God's grace, exemplify forgiveness in your life by forgiving others.
- 04:52
- But more importantly, to be reminded again how costly forgiveness was to God, and that we could be thankful again that we stand in God's stead forgiven.
- 05:05
- It's not my notes, but before I start, is there anything better than to be forgiven, to be cleansed by God, to be loved by God, the
- 05:13
- Creator? God loves me, and he gave his Son to die for me, and we stand forgiven as children. That should affect everything about us.
- 05:21
- Questions and answers about forgiveness. Question number one, does Satan try to hinder me forgiving others?
- 05:29
- Is Satan anti -forgiveness, and what would you just guess? If God wants us to forgive, what must
- 05:36
- Satan try to do? Turn with me to 2 Corinthians chapter 2, and I want to show you Paul's heart, and we'll be able to see this inspired scripture, so you'll know that Satan is going to try to prevent you from forgiving.
- 05:48
- Satan is anti -God, anti -Christ, anti -Jesus, anti -forgiveness.
- 05:54
- And if we exist to give God pleasure, partly by forgiving others as we mirror and mimic
- 06:00
- God's greater forgiveness, then Satan will try to do everything he can to stop it.
- 06:06
- I hate to be a pawn, I hate to be used by other people, wouldn't you hate to be used by Satan to do his bidding and be an unforgiving person?
- 06:14
- An unforgiving spirit is a satanic spirit. And Paul is writing to this group of Corinthians, and they've got all kinds of issues.
- 06:25
- And look at how he teaches them, we'll jump right in and parachute into verse 7 of chapter 2, 2
- 06:30
- Corinthians chapter 2, verse 7, and we'll see how Satan tries to trick and to deceive so that we don't forgive other people.
- 06:39
- So that on the contrary, you should rather forgive and comfort him. He's talking about this false apostle saying all kinds of horrible things about God and about Paul, and he says, otherwise, such a one might be overwhelmed by excessive sorrow.
- 06:54
- Wherefore, I urge you to reaffirm your love for him. Here is this false teacher who has repented and asked for forgiveness and wants to be restored into fellowship.
- 07:02
- And verse 9, it says, for to this end also I wrote, why do I write 2 Corinthians? So that I might put you to the test whether you're obedient in all things.
- 07:12
- But whom you forgive anything, I also forgive. For indeed what I have forgiven, verse 10, if I have forgiven anything,
- 07:20
- I did it for your sakes in the presence of Christ. Verse 11, you might want to underline this verse and don't let it slip past you.
- 07:26
- In order that no advantage be taken of us by Satan.
- 07:33
- Why? For we are not ignorant of his schemes.
- 07:39
- Here this man has hurt Paul and sinned against Paul. And Paul says, Church of Corinth, I'm not there, but he's repentant and he's coming back into fellowship and if you forgive him,
- 07:50
- I forgive him. Because I'm not going to be tricked by Satan, the one who will say, don't forgive, be anti -forgiveness.
- 07:58
- And don't you love Paul's heart here? He has been hurt so horribly by this person.
- 08:04
- But verse 10, he acts like it's nothing. See right in the middle of the verse, 2 Corinthians 2 .10,
- 08:09
- if I have forgiven anything. It's not that serious against me anyway, because it's more serious against the bride of Christ.
- 08:16
- Against Christ himself. And he says, what you say about forgiveness, I say too.
- 08:22
- Your verdict is my verdict. And I don't want to be duped by Satan.
- 08:27
- I don't want to be outwitted by this chess player, by this Stratego player, by this pawn player.
- 08:34
- When you withhold forgiveness, Paul says, it's playing into the strategy of Satan. You can ask yourself the question, granting forgiveness to other people is difficult.
- 08:44
- It's hard, but there's a spiritual warfare that's happening and you don't want to fall into the rut that says,
- 08:52
- I'm not going to forgive because they don't know who I am. They don't know who they've messed with. They don't know how bad it's hurt me, my family, the church.
- 08:59
- I won't forgive. Friends, beloved, talk like that is satanic.
- 09:08
- It's satanic. Satan wants to try to take advantage of you.
- 09:14
- He wants to dupe you and he's after your mind. Corrie Tenboom, I'll be in Germany next week and it's interesting to just think about World War II and all the
- 09:23
- Nazis. Corrie Tenboom, father killed. Betsy killed in the concentration camp.
- 09:30
- And then a few short years later, Corrie's out and she's speaking at a church in Munich about forgiveness.
- 09:38
- The guard who mistreated herself and Betsy comes up.
- 09:44
- By the way, the sermon she was preaching, I don't know if it was a sermon or she should have preached a sermon or any of that, that's not the point, but she was talking about God's forgiveness.
- 09:52
- And here comes the prison guard up to extend his hand towards Corrie Tenboom and then he said,
- 09:59
- I've learned about forgiveness today, would you please forgive me? Corrie's told the story and she said,
- 10:08
- I basically almost couldn't put my hand out to say, yes, I forgive you. You know, when somebody puts their hand out, you automatically want to, but she just couldn't.
- 10:16
- And then she remembered this verse, Matthew chapter six, if you do not forgive others, then your father will not forgive your transgressions.
- 10:25
- And she knew she had to forgive him. So she silently prays, what? Jesus helped me and thrust her hand into her former prison guards hand.
- 10:39
- She wasn't about to be duped by Satan. Satan would say, don't forgive, make this a bigger issue.
- 10:45
- Think about yourself only. It reminds me of Paul's words in Ephesians four, be angry and do not sin.
- 10:51
- Do not let the sun go down on your anger and do not give the devil an opportunity.
- 10:58
- Wants to just get in there and twist things. We are not to let the devil in. No leeway, no place of, of, uh, of ground.
- 11:07
- You don't give the ground up in certain key battle areas. You don't do it here with Satan either.
- 11:15
- Unforgiveness is the perfect garden where Satan's thorns are grown. I don't want that.
- 11:23
- You don't want that. If you have a hard time forgiving other people, you may ask yourself the question.
- 11:28
- I'm most like God when I forgive and I'm most like Satan when
- 11:35
- I don't forgive. You want to keep the devil on a slippery spot.
- 11:41
- You want to follow Peter's admonition. Be of sober spirit, be on the alert. Your adversary, the devil, prowls about like a roaring lion seeking someone to devour.
- 11:55
- Satan would like to split the church. Satan would like fault finders. Satan would like accusations.
- 12:01
- Satan would like complaining. Satan would like gossip. Satan would like troublemaking. Satan would like uncooperative spirits.
- 12:09
- Satan would like unforgiveness. And you add Satan's schemes, like an accelerant put on some building, uh,
- 12:20
- Satan's schemes on top of sinful hearts, it's trouble. By the grace of God, let's not let
- 12:28
- Satan gain any advantage in our lives because we won't forgive other people. Question number two.
- 12:35
- Question number two. Is forgiveness related to bitterness? Is forgiveness related to bitterness?
- 12:42
- What's the answer? It's very directly, it's directly related. Let's go to Ephesians chapter four.
- 12:48
- And again, we're working through Matthew six, but I want to just stop and kind of camp here on this because it's such a vital issue.
- 12:54
- Forgiveness, we are a forgiven people. We have been forgiven much, as we learned last week in Matthew chapter 18, and if we've been forgiven for one billion sins, can't we forgive a sin of someone else?
- 13:07
- Question two. Is forgiveness related to bitterness? Well, last week we looked at this verse just briefly, and I want to show you how this is tied into bitterness.
- 13:16
- Verse 32 said, remember last week, and be kind to one another, Ephesians four, tenderhearted, forgiving each other, just as God in Christ also has forgiven you.
- 13:27
- Now that's very important, but it doesn't give us the whole picture because we just looked at a particular verse. If you want to deal with sin in your life and put on righteousness and put off sin,
- 13:37
- Paul's got a way to teach us. And in Ephesians chapter four, he does it this way. Don't do this, do this instead, and here's the motivation.
- 13:47
- In other words, put off, put on, and here's why, and that's exactly what happens.
- 13:54
- We can't read the put on without looking at the put off. Verse 31, put off, put on the reason why.
- 14:01
- Put off, verse 31, let all bitterness, wrath, anger, clamor, slander be put away from you.
- 14:08
- Get rid of that along with all malice. Put off that, put on, verse 32, be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving each other.
- 14:18
- Put off all bitterness, put on forgiveness, the reason given, just as God in Christ also has what?
- 14:26
- Forgiven you. And so Paul says when you're thinking about forgiveness, bitterness is directly tied to it.
- 14:32
- That's something that we need to get rid of. And if you look at the text, get rid of it, it means get rid of every trace, every particle, every molecule, don't have anything more to do with it, just let it be removed.
- 14:43
- And he has a present imperative there which means all the time, command form. Very strong verb, just get rid of it.
- 14:51
- You know this word is used in Matthew 24, listen to this, you'll like this, and they did not understand until Noah's flood came and it took them all away.
- 15:01
- It got rid of them all. So shall, Jesus said, the coming of the Son of Man be.
- 15:06
- As a flood just wipes everything out, you find the nooks and crannies of your heart where forgiveness is still there and you just flood it out.
- 15:16
- Just get rid of it. One man said, as a flood swept away the inhabitants of the earth, so should all these negative characteristics be swept away from you.
- 15:27
- How about this word to get rid of? Then therefore they cried out, away with Jesus, get rid of Jesus, crucify him, crucify him.
- 15:37
- As they wanted to get rid of Jesus and get them out of their proverbial hair because who wants the
- 15:42
- Savior talking about sin? Get rid of him. So we too should get rid of bitterness.
- 15:51
- And it's at the top of the list, you notice that in Ephesians chapter 4 verse 31? It's at the top of the list, just get rid of it all.
- 15:58
- What is bitterness? Well it's an opposite word of where we get the word sweetness.
- 16:05
- Sweetness is glucose in the Greek, sound familiar? Bitterness in the
- 16:12
- Greek is picria. You can almost feel somebody take a lemon and cut the lemon in half and then take it and just jam it up into your teeth, your top teeth and you get that kind of, you're all moving your mouth right now if you didn't know that.
- 16:28
- And you can just taste that bitterness, it's sour. That's the idea of the word and of course it's not a taste, it's not a taste bud word, it's this sour spirit, it's this foreboding spirit.
- 16:42
- When a woman committed adultery in the Old Testament, Numbers chapter 5, she was given bitter water.
- 16:49
- Well this is not a literal water that we're looking at but this is like a venom that sits in the fangs of the adder and then it's released, except it's released in the person.
- 17:02
- Hostility, bitter taste, figurative for this person who stews and soaks and is marinated in unforgiveness, irritable.
- 17:12
- One man called it a disposition of animosity. Get rid of this grudge filled kind of brooding, you're always on the short end of the stick and everything's just always happening to you.
- 17:24
- Paul says get rid of that and put on forgiveness. My father died,
- 17:31
- I took some of his tools and I have them in my house and one of the things I remember he always used was this vice and so I put the new vice in my little workbench.
- 17:42
- I don't know why I did this, maybe for a sermon illustration, but I put my finger in that vice and I slowly started to turn it in front of the kids.
- 17:51
- You know if you get used to that you can turn it just a little bit more, tap, tap, tap, tap and all of a sudden it just starts crushing.
- 17:56
- Don't use this finger because it really hurts that knuckle. But the smaller one, it's okay.
- 18:04
- Don't try this at home. It's like resentment bound up in the heart of someone and it just keeps getting tighter and tighter and tighter.
- 18:14
- Bound up resentment like a vice grip. And Paul says get rid of it. True or false?
- 18:20
- This word, picria, or bitterness, is used of God. It's used either of the Father or the
- 18:26
- Son or the Spirit. What would you think? Of course not. Now this word is never used of God. It is used in Colossians chapter 3 though, husbands love your wives and do not be embittered against them.
- 18:45
- Unbelievers are characterized by this bitterness, seeing the faults of everyone and the blemishes of everyone.
- 18:51
- Romans chapter 3, unbelievers are described by Paul whose mouth is full of cursing and bitterness.
- 19:00
- You type in bitterness in the internet, I've even found a website that promotes it. The book of bitterness, quote, bitterness has a bad rap.
- 19:09
- Bitter people are often maligned, accused of being a surly bunch of nonproductive whiners who are seldom satisfied and never happy.
- 19:15
- This paints a distorted picture, however, since the bitter are in a reality a fairly normal lot, cursed with the ability to see the world as it is.
- 19:25
- Bitter people have always understood that the world is not fair. They have known for some time that good guys don't always win.
- 19:32
- That people are often their own worst enemy. You can underline that one. Bitterness is not a condition of despair, it's an affirmation of reality, a willingness to call a spade a spade even when the opinion is unpopular and politically incorrect.
- 19:46
- Wow. Paul would call bitterness something opposite of that and he would call it cancer of the soul.
- 19:54
- It is like a rattlesnake if cornered that bites itself. It is like that dog on YouTube that I've seen that's eating something and its leg comes over to scratch its ear and he thinks it's another dog trying to take away its treat and starts growling at his own foot trying to bite at its own foot.
- 20:10
- And you look at it and you go, this is incredibly stupid. The man said resentment is like taking poison and waiting for the other person to die.
- 20:28
- You say, but I'm not bitter, Pastor. Let me give you some code words for bitterness. And so if the Spirit of God can unroot some of these things and you can say, well, maybe there's bitterness in my heart and I need to forgive.
- 20:38
- When we see a bitter spirit, then we see a spirit that needs forgiveness to grant forgiveness rather.
- 20:45
- Are these code words for you if you think you're not bitter? Hurt. I'm hurt, upset, offended, bothered, annoyed, irritated, resentful, at the boiling point, disturbed, disappointed, frustrated, distressed, displeased, bugged.
- 21:13
- Bible says get rid of this. Get rid of it. We have been granted full forgiveness, complete forgiveness, past, present and future sins.
- 21:22
- Every sin Jesus paid the full punishment. The holy justice do us, Jesus took instead.
- 21:29
- And we are then in light of that and because of it and because the Spirit of God will allow it and energizes to do it, we are to forgive.
- 21:37
- Now all those code words are interesting, but I have something in my own life that I've learned from Jim Wilson that I think is the most effective.
- 21:44
- When doing self -diagnosis, am I bitter and should I just try to get rid of these issues in my life so I can forgive and be like Christ?
- 21:52
- Here is what you need to remember. Bitterness remembers details. Bitterness remembers details.
- 22:00
- Why does bitterness, why does a bitter spirit know all the facts? Because they replay them over and over and over and over.
- 22:09
- It's like the wife to the marriage counselor cartoon regarding the husband. And then do you know what he did on her honeymoon just 21 years ago?
- 22:19
- Or you could flip it around I'm sure. You've had millions of conversations in your life, tens of thousands of discussions.
- 22:29
- How can you remember every word that was said on that dark and rainy day, 6 o 'clock in the afternoon in Nebraska at the airport?
- 22:36
- Why? Because you've just played it over and over and over and over.
- 22:43
- And when we're to forgive, God says you're to let it go and you're to forget about it, but we keep playing it over and over and over.
- 22:54
- Jim Wilson says, someone might object and say that it's possible to have a good memory of a wonderful conversation.
- 23:01
- Is this possible? Yes, but not likely. Why is this? Because memory is helped by review, review, and more review.
- 23:11
- I think Paul says to the Church of Colossae, something much better, reflective of the love shown towards us in Christ Jesus, bear with one another and forgive one another.
- 23:21
- Just as the Lord forgave you, so also should you. Are you bitter?
- 23:28
- Question number three. It's a related question. What if I can forgive the sin against me and the sinner, but I can't forget it?
- 23:36
- What if I can forgive, but not forget? I have great news for you today. You don't have to.
- 23:43
- You don't have to forget it. How about God? When God forgives, does
- 23:49
- He still remember what we did? Is it in His mind? Does He understand as an omniscient
- 23:55
- God what has happened in the universe? Yes. But what happens?
- 24:02
- Turn with me to Isaiah chapter 43, if you would, please. I want to just show you that if we model
- 24:07
- God's forgiveness towards us, then what we'll try to do is actively not remember.
- 24:13
- It's called active not remembering. God of course knows what everything that has happened in the universe, but when
- 24:23
- He says I won't remember it anymore, I won't remember it to do anything about it, to punish anyone for it.
- 24:30
- I won't bring it up within the Trinity. I won't bring it up to other people. When we say we forgive someone, it is a promise that we will never bring it up again to anyone.
- 24:43
- Not them. We'll try not to even remember ourselves, and we won't talk about it to someone else.
- 24:48
- It is a promise. When God says I won't remember your sins, He promises not to do that, and that's what we're looking for.
- 24:55
- Not some kind of we've got to get it out of our memory once and for all. Isaiah 43 .25,
- 25:02
- you can see this great God dealing with His chosen people, and it says in Isaiah 43 .25,
- 25:08
- I, even I, the one who wipes out your transgressions, remember that's a more harsh word for sin than missing the mark, transgressions, this actively aggressive way of sinning.
- 25:24
- I will, I'm the one who wipes out your transgressions for my own sake, that is to say so my name is praised, and I will what?
- 25:34
- Not remember your sins. When God remembered
- 25:39
- Noah, He remembered Noah because He remembered that He would do something about Noah and rescued him.
- 25:45
- He wasn't just saying, oh yeah, I forgot about Noah, I'm busy doing things in the universe, and I better remember Noah again, oops,
- 25:50
- I forgot. He says I'm not going to, I'm going to do something active, and that active thing is
- 25:57
- I'm going to remember Noah and rescue him. And here, this is an active, I'm not going to remember, it is an active non -remembering.
- 26:07
- Not going to bring these up to anyone, not to God, not to other people, people have said please forgive me,
- 26:12
- I've granted forgiveness, and then it is over. You say I don't know if I could do that, well you know,
- 26:18
- God helps us do that. God helps us do that, listen to this story, you'll like it. And Joseph named the first born son, what was
- 26:28
- Joseph's first born son named? His first born son, Manasseh.
- 26:35
- Why? For he said, Genesis 41, 51, God has made me forget all my trouble and all my father's household.
- 26:45
- That was a lot to forget, wasn't there? The brothers and the sister and all these kind of issues and slavery, almost going to take his life.
- 26:55
- Joseph could have said, you know what, I'm going to waste my life remembering all these details and just a cancer of my soul, I'm just going to be so bitter because if anybody deserves to be bitter,
- 27:03
- I will be. When I was younger, by the way, I always wondered why do young people have tons of friends in the neighborhood and my grandmother and other grandparents have no friends and they just are alone, lonely and watch the
- 27:18
- TV all day. Well, there's lots of reasons, but one of the reasons is because when you don't grant forgiveness, you lose all your friends.
- 27:27
- Joseph could have wasted his life and he named his kids, God causes me to forget,
- 27:36
- God made me to forget. When God forgives, he says on the record,
- 27:42
- I won't bring it up anymore. One marriage counselor said, sometimes marriages fail in counseling because the couples don't just get hysterical, they get historical.
- 28:02
- When you say, please forgive me and that person says, I forgive you, they are making a promise to you,
- 28:09
- I will never ever bring it up again for as long as I live. And by the way, if it's brought up again, you know what that reveals?
- 28:18
- It reveals that they never forgave in the first place. Civil War was over,
- 28:26
- Robert E. Lee visited Kentucky and the lady took him outside to the backyard to this great grand old wonderful tree.
- 28:36
- And she cried out in anger and bitterness towards the Yankees because the federal artillery had destroyed the tree and the limbs and the trunk.
- 28:46
- And she looked to Lee and she thought Lee was going to say something bad about the Yankees.
- 28:54
- Sympathize with my loss. Here's what Robert E. Lee said to the lady. Ma 'am, cut it down and forget it.
- 29:04
- Just get rid of it. Let me push the envelope. Those of you who are visiting,
- 29:10
- I don't have any track record to say this and so this is just my way to provoke things. I preach like I want to be preached to.
- 29:21
- If you're having a hard time forgiving people, of course say, Lord, would you grant me that?
- 29:26
- Pray to God. And we'll look at that in just a little bit about how prayer will help us. But may
- 29:32
- I take some advice from Martin Lloyd -Jones and make it my own and give it to you? If you have a hard time actively forgetting, actively not remembering, quit praying about it.
- 29:49
- How about that? Dear Lord, I just have this bitter spirit against someone and I just can't forget what they did.
- 29:55
- You remember that day, August 12th, 1943, and you rehearsed the whole thing secretly but it's in the code of prayer.
- 30:02
- How about quit praying about it? God, I deserve nothing. I deserve less than nothing. You've made me your child and you've given me life and you take pleasure in me.
- 30:12
- I live for your pleasure and my pleasure is to obey you because the Spirit of God indwells me and I can actually obey you,
- 30:19
- God, for your pleasure. And I don't want to think about it anymore. I don't want to dwell on it anymore. I prayed about it once. Once is enough.
- 30:25
- And then just help me to move on. I think that might be a good prayer. Cut it down.
- 30:34
- I mean, if Corrie Ten Boom struggled, I think we probably could struggle much less.
- 30:41
- But she was thinking about this very idea and she didn't know what to do. So she went up to a pastor and she said, you know,
- 30:46
- I keep remembering what was done to my father and my mother and my sister
- 30:52
- Betsy, killed. I can't sleep at night because I keep remembering these sins against me.
- 31:00
- So the pastor was smart. Up in the church tower is a bell which is rung by pulling on a rope.
- 31:07
- But do you know what, Corrie? After the sexton lets go of the rope, the bell keeps on swinging.
- 31:13
- First ding, then dome. Slower and slower until there's a final doing, dong, and it stops.
- 31:20
- I believe the same thing is true of forgiveness, Corrie. When we forgive, we take our hand off the rope.
- 31:27
- But if we've been tugging at our grievances for a long time, we mustn't be surprised if the old angry thoughts keep coming for a while.
- 31:35
- They're just the ding -dongs of the old bell slowing down. Isn't that good advice? Proverbs says a man's discretion makes him slow to anger, and it is a glory to overlook a transgression.
- 31:51
- You're never more like Jesus when you forgive. Another question. This is a fast one and an easy one, but people struggle with it.
- 31:59
- Next question. What if I'm having trouble forgiving myself? I hear it all the time.
- 32:05
- Answer, you should have trouble forgiving yourself because it is not a biblical concept. It's not a biblical concept.
- 32:14
- It's a psychological concept. It's a man -centered concept. It's valuable for us to recognize.
- 32:24
- It's wrong biblical thinking when we say something like, I've got to forgive myself. You say, well, where's the
- 32:30
- Bible verse for it? It's not a Bible verse because God never tells us to forgive ourselves. There are not three commandments that are great.
- 32:36
- There are two. Loving God, loving our neighbor. As ourselves, but we're not commanded to love ourselves.
- 32:42
- As we love ourselves, we're to love others. That's the point of the second great commandment. One man said, the person who complains about not being self -forgiving is often simply looking for flattering words from others as a way of salving the hurt that guilt has caused to their pride.
- 32:59
- So say, Lord, I've sinned against you and these other people, if that's true, and then
- 33:05
- I need forgiveness. All right, let's go up the ladder. Next question. How important is it for me to forgive
- 33:12
- God? I can't even hardly repeat that sentence, but I will. How important is it for me to forgive
- 33:20
- God? Let's turn to 1 John, please, quickly. 1 John, the epistle of John.
- 33:29
- We are never to forgive God because to ask for forgiveness always implies someone has sinned.
- 33:35
- So, God has never sinned against us. God is not some sinner. God has never sinned ever in His life, nor will
- 33:43
- He. Everything God does is righteous by action and by definition. God does not need to be forgiven.
- 33:51
- If you have something in your life that has gone wrong, a tragedy, a real tragedy, you are under no circumstances to ask
- 33:58
- God for, that you're to grant God forgiveness. He's never done any wrong.
- 34:05
- He never will. And John's epistle, first epistle, verse 5 of chapter 1 is very insightful.
- 34:17
- It tells us about who God is, and then in chapter 2, it tells us about the wonders of Christ Jesus. Wonderful words to the soul.
- 34:26
- 1 John 1 .5, this is the message we have heard from Him, and announced to you that God is what?
- 34:34
- Light. He's pure. He's holy. He's above reproach. And in Him there is what?
- 34:40
- No darkness at all. There are implications to that as well. If we say that we have fellowship with Him and yet walk in the darkness, we lie and do not practice the truth.
- 34:51
- But if we walk in the light as He Himself is in the light, we have fellowship with one another. And the blood of Jesus, His Son, cleanses
- 34:58
- God from all His sin. See, it's asinine. Cleanses us from all our sin.
- 35:05
- If we say we have no sin, verse 8, we're deceiving ourselves. I'd also say if we think God has sin, we're deceiving ourselves, and the truth isn't in us.
- 35:13
- Verse 9, and watch the transition from sins to the Savior. Never stop reading chapter 1.
- 35:19
- Go on to chapter 2. Never stop in Romans chapter 7. Go on and keep reading to chapter 8. Verse 9, if we confess our sins,
- 35:28
- He is faithful and righteous. He's always faithful. He's always righteous to forgive us our sins, plural, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.
- 35:40
- If we say we have not sinned, we make Him a liar, and His Word is not in us. And now here comes the Savior. My little children, can't you just hear
- 35:47
- John talking this way? I'm writing these things to you that you may not sin. And if anyone sins, we have an ongoing advocate.
- 35:57
- We have a defense lawyer. We have someone who will stand in our place with the Father. Jesus Christ, righteous, the righteous one.
- 36:05
- And He himself, emphatically, is a propitiation for our sins, and not ours only, but also for those of the whole world.
- 36:13
- Friends, it is never, ever right to try to forgive yourself. But more important than that, it is never right for you to somehow forgive.
- 36:24
- Next question. Is there any sin that's committed against me that I should not forgive?
- 36:31
- Is there an unforgivable sin? There's the blasphemy of the Holy Spirit that's unforgivable in God's eyes.
- 36:37
- What about our eyes? Is there anything that's ever done against you that could be done, that has been done, that you should say,
- 36:43
- I don't have to forgive? Turn with me to Mark chapter 11, please. Mark chapter 11. And again, we're under the topic of forgiveness that's flowing out of our exposition, a verse -by -verse study and Sermon on the
- 36:56
- Mount. What does God think about forgiveness? The importance of forgiveness. Is there something we should say, you know what, you've gone too far.
- 37:04
- I don't have to forgive that. After all, it's not really a bad question because you'll see in the epistles of the
- 37:11
- New Testament, there's even a time where the apostle says, you ought not to even pray for this person.
- 37:17
- There's certain things that when people do them, they don't even deserve prayer. So, it's a fair question to say, should my forgiveness be comprehensive?
- 37:27
- Should there be something that's reserved for no forgiveness? Mark chapter 11, verse 25 is insightful on a number of fronts.
- 37:37
- Whenever you stand praying, forgive. If you have, what's the next word?
- 37:45
- Anything against anyone so that your Father also who is in heaven may forgive your transgressions.
- 37:56
- As comprehensive as God's love is for you shown in the forgiveness because of Christ Jesus' death, so too must our forgiveness be comprehensive.
- 38:07
- There's no danger or trouble zone for us to say, you know what, I've forgiven too much. I think they've kind of earned their forgiveness for the week or for the month or for the day.
- 38:17
- I ought not to forgive anymore. I've been too gracious, too liberal, too extreme in my forgiving.
- 38:30
- We ought to forgive liberally because we have been forgiven liberally. If you have anything against anyone so that your
- 38:37
- Father also who is in heaven may forgive you your transgressions. I read a story this week and I was shocked.
- 38:45
- I won't give you all the details. Harry Ironside tells a story about these missionaries who are now going to celebrate the
- 38:51
- Lord's table. They're all gathering around for the cup and for the elements and the bread. And all of a sudden as they're getting ready to break bread together for the
- 38:59
- Lord's supper, in walks in this other person who's indigenous to the culture.
- 39:06
- And he could see this other man's face change. What was it that troubled you?
- 39:12
- The man said, oh, the other man who just came in ate the body of my father as a cannibal.
- 39:25
- God had saved him. And now he has come in to remember the Lord with us. At first I didn't know whether I could endure it.
- 39:33
- But it's all right now. Jesus has washed us both with the precious blood of Christ.
- 39:44
- Nothing is off limits when it comes to forgiving. Next question.
- 39:51
- Just a few more. Reminds me of the old story when Don Kissler became a pastor,
- 39:57
- I think in Pennsylvania. His very first Sunday he preached 45 -50 minutes and stood by the door and greeted people.
- 40:03
- And the one man was first to get in line. And he was kind of the spokesperson of the church.
- 40:09
- And he said, you preach too long. Don Kissler, smarter than the average bear, said, preach too long for whom?
- 40:20
- Well, me, of course. He said, that's just the point, sir. I don't preach for you.
- 40:25
- I preach for Jesus Christ. And I'm quite sure after 45 minutes of hearing his word preached, he's not bored.
- 40:33
- Blessed subtraction. Sorry, I'm not supposed to say that. True story.
- 40:43
- Something about getting in the word and hearing it preached, you forget what time it is. He said, I would have forgotten the time except you just told me it's been 42 minutes into the sermon.
- 40:52
- I know. I shouldn't have told you. Next question. How crucial is the Holy Spirit enabling the believer to forgive?
- 40:59
- Well, the answer is obvious. It is absolutely crucial for the
- 41:05
- Spirit of God to enable us to forgive. Let me put it a different way.
- 41:15
- If you say, I'm really struggling with forgiving someone, I'll say lots of things, but here's my first comment.
- 41:22
- Good. The struggle is good. Because before you were a Christian, my guess is there wouldn't have been a struggle.
- 41:30
- You just would have said, I won't forgive. I can't forgive. I will not forgive. But then the
- 41:35
- Spirit of God gives us new nature and rescues us and captures us and turns us into God's children.
- 41:42
- And we mimic Him and we're like Him and we imitate Him. And then the struggle comes. Unbelievers don't struggle.
- 41:50
- They might struggle because of the consequence of sin. But they don't struggle with sin because they want to do the righteous thing.
- 41:55
- Once God saves us, then we begin to struggle. That's Romans chapter 7.
- 42:03
- Unbelievers don't have that kind of struggle. Remember Ephesians chapter 4.
- 42:10
- We were just there. Forgive one another just as God in Christ has forgiven you. Follows chapters 1, 2, and 3.
- 42:16
- Remember chapters 1, 2, and 3? Here this great God of the universe in eternity past chose you before time to set
- 42:24
- His love on you. Like He did Israel, He did you. Not because you were great or mighty or noble or righteous, but because God's glory would be magnified by choosing you unconditionally.
- 42:36
- Then He sent His Son in time 2 ,000 years ago to die for those chosen ones. To redeem them.
- 42:42
- To propitiate them. To propitiate God's wrath. To reconcile them. Then the Spirit of God, when you got saved for me 20 years ago, made me born again.
- 42:51
- Made me new. Made me alive. And now because of what God has done in eternity past at Calvary, at salvation, ongoing now work of the
- 42:59
- Holy Spirit, I can forgive. We can't just muster it up.
- 43:05
- This is not I'm forcing myself. God, I can't forgive might be a real prayer.
- 43:11
- But God, I know you told me to forgive in Scripture, so please help me obey.
- 43:17
- The ground of my behavior for obedience is based on Christ's perfect work.
- 43:26
- Martin Lloyd -Jones says, I say to the glory of God and in utter humility, that whenever I see myself before God and realize even something of what my blessed
- 43:37
- Lord has done for me, I'm ready to forgive anybody anything.
- 43:44
- All right. One last question. One or two last questions.
- 43:53
- I have another 10 questions. Is there a difference between transactional forgiveness and what we would call regular forgiveness?
- 44:05
- Let's turn to Luke chapter 17, please. Luke chapter 17, this question was asked of me in the donut room, in the prayer room.
- 44:14
- And here's the issue. If someone comes to you and says, please forgive me, we know that we should grant forgiveness.
- 44:23
- But what happens if someone doesn't come to you and say, please forgive me? If they're dead, well, then there's nothing you can do about it.
- 44:30
- And you can strike that up to the providence of God where that transaction, that fellowship, that restoration could not be accomplished.
- 44:37
- But if they're alive and they've sinned against you, but haven't come to say, please forgive me, should you forgive?
- 44:46
- Well, there's two schools of thought. And I think we'll find the truth in the middle.
- 44:52
- That doesn't always happen, but I think in this case it does. Luke chapter 17, quickly he said to his disciples, verse 1, it's inevitable that stumbling blocks come, but woe to him through whom they come.
- 45:03
- It would be better for him if a millstone were hung around his neck and were thrown into the sea. Then he would cause one of these little
- 45:10
- Christians, it has nothing to do with the small child, but one of these little Christians to stumble.
- 45:17
- Verse 3, Luke 17, be on your guard. Because you've got to pay attention because there's important ramifications here.
- 45:25
- And if you're not careful, there's going to be surprise attack. If your brother sins, rebuke him.
- 45:30
- And if he repents, forgive him. And if he sins against you seven times a day and returns to you seven times saying,
- 45:38
- I repent, forgive him. If you ever heard a sermon like that by Jesus Christ, you would respond one way and only one way if you're thinking righteously.
- 45:46
- And how would you respond if Jesus said that to you? There's only one response to that kind of message.
- 45:52
- We've heard it so many times, it just kind of goes past us. When Jesus says something like that to someone else, what do you do?
- 45:59
- There's only one response. Verse 5 is the response. What? I can't do that.
- 46:06
- Increase our faith. I've got to have more faith to do something like that. The Bible teaches two kinds of forgiveness.
- 46:15
- Luke 17, if someone repents, then forgive them. Do you believe that?
- 46:22
- It's right there in the text. Please forgive me. It's like there's a big issue between you and someone else.
- 46:27
- Here's the big issue, the sin issue. And you go to the person and you say, please forgive me. Now the person's got that issue.
- 46:34
- And they say one of two things. I don't forgive you. They hold on to it, which is sin now on their part.
- 46:41
- Or they say, you know what? Jesus forgave me. I'll get rid of it. Okay. But what happens if that person comes to you and says, please forgive me, but I haven't repented?
- 46:54
- Now you know why people write theology books on prayer and forgiveness. The Bible teaches both kinds.
- 47:01
- If they repent, Luke 17, forgive them. If they come and ask for forgiveness, forgive them.
- 47:08
- But we read Mark 11 just earlier, and it says Jesus tells us, if you stand praying in worship and you have anything against anyone, what's it say?
- 47:18
- It doesn't say Matthew 5, drop everything and be reconciled. Here in Mark 11, it says what? Let it go.
- 47:26
- The Bible teaches both kinds of forgiveness. J. Adams teaches one kind, transactional alone.
- 47:32
- No forgiveness granted without repentance and the transaction. But I believe
- 47:38
- Mark 11, and I believe in MacArthur's view and others, there are good men on all different sides, that there is truth to that transactional forgiveness.
- 47:47
- That's the way we should treat our spouses if they've broken fellowship. As a matter of fact, let me give you an illustration.
- 47:54
- Not a personal illustration, but just an illustration. Your wife sins against you, and you sin against your wife every day, day in and day out, over and over and over.
- 48:02
- But most of the time, you just cover a sin. What does love do? Love does what? Puts that sin on the prayer chain.
- 48:10
- Calls up www .bbchurch .org. Here's what she did. What do you do most of the time when you're sinned against?
- 48:18
- You ought to cover. You ought not to say, I have a special ministry in the church, and that ministry is confronting my wife.
- 48:24
- That's a bad deal there. You don't become a deacon like that, I'll tell you that. You cover.
- 48:30
- And you just say, you know, it's a glory to cover a transgression. And you don't always have to confront, you did this.
- 48:36
- But occasionally, if fellowship is really broken, and you have a hard time covering, you go to your spouse and say,
- 48:42
- I'm a nobody. I'm a sinful person. I've sinned against you probably more than you've sinned against me. But you said these things to me, and they were wrong.
- 48:50
- They were sin against God, a sin against me, and I just can't get over it. Could you help me? And that person says, please forgive me.
- 48:58
- And then you say, what? So even in that marriage illustration, you see both kinds of forgiveness.
- 49:06
- One, you're standing there praying, and you say, I forgive, I let it go. And the other that you say, you know, there's a time for transactional forgiveness, where I say, please forgive me, and you say,
- 49:15
- I forgive you. If you'd like to read a great book on the subject, From Freedom to Forgiveness by John MacArthur, we'll talk about both of those views.
- 49:26
- Well, time is gone. Now I'll just ask you the question. Are you known as a forgiver?
- 49:34
- If I had to look at the marriages and say, you know, which married couple would be the one who asks for forgiveness the most?
- 49:42
- Which one of you in the church is known for the one who says, you know what? I don't have to defend myself.
- 49:48
- I don't have to protect myself. I am who I am because of Christ's perfect work. My self -justification days are gone.
- 49:55
- I have nothing to lose because I stand here as one who has been won by the love of God in Christ Jesus.
- 50:02
- We want to be forgiving people because we have been forgiven much. And to end the sermon where I started it,
- 50:11
- I want to be captured for the pleasure of God, not be duped by Satan and be an unforgiving person.
- 50:20
- Nothing you do more resembles God than when you forgive. Nothing resembles
- 50:27
- Satan more when you don't forgive. Let's pray. Our Father in heaven, we praise your name for your forgiveness.
- 50:35
- Free to us but costly for you to send your son to die in our place.
- 50:41
- But Lord, we know we have resurrection power through the spirit of God to forgive other people because you've promised us that.
- 50:49
- You've promised us Him, the Holy Spirit. And we would pray that we'd be a church that as we're sinned against, as we sin against one another, that we would be quick to obey, quick to forgive, quick to rejoice in the fact that we are debtors.
- 51:03
- We have sinned a thousand million times more and we are forgiven. And so Lord, where else could a group of people be together and love to forgive?
- 51:12
- It could only happen in your church, the Bride of Christ. And we exalt your name for that. We want to exist to give you pleasure.
- 51:19
- May you be pleased as your spirit grants us faith and obedience to forgive.