Bear With One Another

Bearing with one another. And there really are two main scriptures I want to look at. And then I have listed some supported scriptures but the markers are a little light. So anyway and if you remember and I just want to remind you as brother Mike brought up last week the two main scriptures for this is in Ephesians and Colossians and if you if you were to take the book of Ephesians at the book of Colossians in and there are some definite distinctions because Paul's dealing with two different issues in F1 in Ephesus and one in Colossae.

The Main Texts in Ephesians and Colossians

But much of what is written in Ephesians as far as practical living is also in Colossians. So just there are many parallels. And so I want to look at that this morning. But let's read the two main scriptures and then we'll go from there.

So first go to Ephesians chapter 4. And then we'll go to Colossians chapter 3 and then we'll come back and forth in between the two with this thought of bearing with one another. Okay. Ephesians chapter 4 verses 1 and 2.

I therefore the prisoner of the Lord beseech you to have a walk worthy of the calling which you were called with all lowliness gentleness long-suffering bearing with one another in love endeavoring to keep the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace.

So there we have that's the Ephesians passage. Now go to Colossians chapter 3 and I'm going to read from verse 12 on down a little bit as Paul this therefore as the elect of God holy and beloved put on tender mercies kindness humbleness of mind meekness long-suffering bearing with one another and forgiving one another.

If anyone has a complaint against another even as Christ forgave you so you must also do let me just read verse 14. But above all things put on love which is the bond of perfection. So those are the two main passages.

So I may ask you and to get started when when you read that where it says to bear with one another what comes to your mind. Well how would you. I would say it's not a word that we used every day. But if you had to find what bearing means what do you think it means besides Yogi to bear.

Or you want to know something that's exactly what the word means one of them. And I'm going to show you how to script to use it. But you absolutely right system put up. Like my wife bears with me she puts up with me.

Yeah anything else anything else when you think of bearing. Okay I'm gonna put this down and I'm going to show you how it bears out. If that bears out that bearing with one another means in one tense standing too many lines standing erect or standing firm.

I'm going to show you how it's used and what's interesting to me especially as you go through these one another's is all the different terms that are spoken of in in how we are to treat one another how we are to act with one another how we are to deal with one another.

And yet there's distinctions in them all and again. So as we're looking at 36 one another's and yet as I continue to say and I will continue say they're interwoven. Nick they're connected. They're not always the exact same thing.

But I think you gave me patience enduring put ups standing firm. I'm going to show you how the word is used in 2nd Thessalonians chapter 2. I'm 2nd Thessalonians chapter 1. I'll read it if you don't want to look at it.

But in 2nd Thessalonians chapter 1 in verse 4 we read this. It says we are obligated to thank God for you all all the time brothers as it is fitting because your faith is growing more and more and your love for one another is increasing.

That is why we boast among God's churches about your perseverance in faith in the face of all persecution and affliction that you are I have in the New King James enduring what and somebody. I have a different version.

Okay that's the same word that's used for bearing in Ephesians chapter 4 and Colossians chapter 3 that that word when he talks about facing persecution and enduring that which was they were enduring. And that's where it really comes about standing firm.

And so this idea of bearing with one another is is not just putting up with and I'm going to show you how that word is translated exactly that way in the scriptures but it also has the idea of being able to withstand or being able to maintain yourself in the light of and I hope to show you in the light of offenses or in the light of what hopefully we'll talk about for a moment in light of infirmities that we all possess we use different words for like shortcomings and personality quirks and traits and propensities and all those different things.

This idea of bearing with one another really has as one of its main meanings that we are we don't become overwhelmed by it matter of fact we're able to to stand firm in the midst of it and therefore we're able to conduct ourselves in the way that we should now let me show you another way it's translated and again from the New King James in 2nd Corinthians chapter 11 and verse 20.

And this is what it says for you put up with it if one brings you into bondage if one devours you if one takes from you if one exalts himself if one strikes you on the face. And that for you put up is exactly the same word for bearing that there is a reality in which that that is the definition of it.

So I also wanted to bring this scripture into it. And this is from Hebrews chapter 13 in verse 22 and it says. And I appeal to you brethren bear with the word of exhortation. For I have written you in a few words bear with.

And again the thought is not just when you agree this word sounds like a negative. Don't it. Now I can't I can't keep putting up with you. Right. That I mean to me this is not as much of a positive word as a negative word but but this one is to me more positive and that's why he says that we would do well to bear with the word of exhortation in other words not to be overcome with it not to be flustered by it not to be knocked sideways.

Why. Good morning Cindy. But to be able to to conduct ourselves in the light of it. So I wanted to show you that because I think it's essential when when we read how the translators and remember it depending on your version you might have it they might be a different way.

But how to translate is take the same word sometimes and put it in a different setting or you break it out in a different way. Because sometimes again sometimes it has more of the thought of being patient and another time it has the thought of standing firm and the context kind of dictates where that should be.

So when we think about bearing with one another and if these are some of the ingredients then I think we got some things to to think about in our lives. So let's go back to the Ephesians passage now and I want to start to just consider it.

Bearing With One Another in Light of Our Calling

So we're looking Ephesians and as I said go back and forth between Ephesians and Colossians. So Ephesians chapter 4 mm-hmm. And let me just read it again. There's a point I want to make that I believe is essential to this whole thought.

So look what he says. I therefore the prisoner of the Lord beseech you to have a walk worthy of the calling which you yourselves with which you were called with all lowliness gentleness long-suffering.

And it's interesting how it is a distinction between long-suffering and bearing because you would think long-suffering and bearing would be the same thing but it's not. It's a different word and has a little different connotation to it long-suffering bearing with one another.

And then it talks about how we ought to do this. We ought to do it in love. And I wanted to ask you to think about this because there's a couple things. One is this both here and I'm gonna just you don't have to do it stay right there.

I'm gonna go back to Colossians for a minute because I wanted us to highlight a point. The point is this look what Paul says in Ephesians 4 I therefore the prisoner of the Lord beseech you that you walk worthy of the calling with which you were called.

And then in Colossians chapter 3 he says therefore as the elect of God and beloved put on tend to mercies kindness humbleness of my meekness long-suffering bearing one another. Here's the point and I think it's important we need to understand brothers and sisters that the one another's of the Bible as we've been going through them in our study as well as all the other instruction in the Bible is to be considered by us in light of the reality of God's calling to us.

In other words I guess what I'm trying to say is especially us who not only stand firm on the sovereignty of God and believe that God is the ruler of all and overall but we must realize that we need to stand firm on the doctrines of grace not only because of the doctrine but we to stand firm on the doctrines of grace because they are the things that are to transform our lives.

In other words I guess what I'm trying to say. And maybe you disagree. And if you do that's no that's fine I'll put up with you but we who believe in the sovereignty God and the doctrines of grace who stand firm on that we should be in that sense the people above all other people who consider our walks in in a very serious steadfast way.

In other words I guess what I'm trying to say and if you think about it if you think about I don't want to go too far off on this but if you think about how the the the epistles are written I don't care where you go Romans, Ephesians, Philippians, Colossians.

Right straight through you will find and we've talked about this but it's good to remind ourselves you will find that the practical applications are on the latter half of the letters and epistles. Right.

Again Romans is a perfect example first 11 chapters of what basically doctrine and then he goes into practice and you can go to Ephesians and the first chapters first especially chapter 1 chapter 2 and even to chapter 3 is doctrinal right.

And then it goes into practical application. Same thing with Philippians same thing with Colossians and and and the the letters to the church at Thessalonica. I guess what I'm trying to say brothers and sisters we have a very great charge by God and we ought to consider that because we are the called of God now that doesn't mean that people who don't believe in the sovereignty of God don't live as they ought to.

That's not what I'm trying to say. Well what I am trying to say is if all the doctrines of grace do is roll around in our heads and not in our lives then I don't believe we understand the doctrines of grace.

Would you agree with that that practical living comes out of doctrinal truth. And that's why unfortunately many people will say does doctrine really matter. Well yeah right. Because if you look how Paul frames us it's almost like he's setting a ring and he and he's he's gonna put this jewel in the middle of it for now of of the one another's loving one another being lonely being humble bearing on one another.

But the setting around it is is basically what he just said that we have a worthy walk according to the call that we've been given. And then in Colossians being the elect of God how we ought to be of such a character.

And I guess that's where the rub really comes in. Right in our lives is we do we really walk in light of who we are. That's a question that that would take much consideration and much care in our own souls and in our own minds that the truth of the sovereignty of God and God's electing grace ought to be transformative.

It ought to transform us from from one kind of a person to another kind of person. Right. Again. Otherwise it's just head knowledge. And there are many people that could spit out the doctrines of grace.

And that's all they could do is spit out the doctrines of grace. They can't live in the light of the doctrines of grace. So and that goes true for for all the other one in those I again I'll leave it at that brothers and sisters we ought to be distinct.

We ought to be distinct like no other people especially us who uphold God's sovereign grace comments concerns compliments. Yeah you will love you will be called many things. Right. I was called a Calvinism once Calvinism.

And then I said a Calvinism. Where did you get that. He said I got it on the Internet. But again if all we want to do is walk around say I'm a Calvinist without having the life that complements being a Calvinist then are we really a Calvinist.

Right. Because again it's more than doctrine it's it's a it's a worldview. Isn't it. And not only is it a worldview it's the way we live. So again as Paul writes this he never loses sight of that. And I don't care where you go in the scriptures especially as we look at the epistles Paul as well as the other writers.

But Paul highlights look at Romans. Just think about what Romans 12 1 says. I beseech you therefore brethren. By what. By the mercies of God. Well isn't he again talking about the reality of God having sovereignly granted us newness of life.

I in light of that that you have a walk worthy. And so again all these things are important and essential in our calling. Okay. So let me ask you to think a little bit more well before I do the other message.

Because does this apply only in the church. In other words are we only to bear up with one another in the church.

There is bearing with one another in love right having patience and enduring and standing firm and especially putting up with somebody or people in love.

Yeah it's hard to do. It can be hard to do. Yeah yeah. Well it could be it could be it can be hard to do with people we love.

Jesus said someone compels you to carry this stuff for a mile. Go with him. Twang. You know. Yeah he's asking for your coat. Give him your cloak too. Yeah he doesn't. Say. Simply for those who are within the body of Christ those aren't the people who are compelling you to do these things.

So as we go through these one.

Another's then there's an applicant there's a very strong application within the body of Christ. I'm going to show you to what he why he says that and how it says here. But would you not agree with me also that as Paul says as much as lies within you what live peaceably with all men although again I mean for us to just say I look for me to just say I love everybody exactly the same.

I'm just a liar right. And there's reasons for that right. I mean there's definitely reasons some good some not so good right. Yeah but but these whole all these one another's and especially this so again as I said this truth of our calling is really how we ought to work it out otherwise we're nothing better than hearers of the word right that we just be like Pharisees.

So anyway this whole idea of bearing on one another and and putting up and you know what's interesting and I guess I think about this as I study for these things and examine myself is that God knows my heart in this in these areas.

I mean I think we're all pretty good at disguising ourselves just my thought of making people think one thing when we really think it's something else. And and the reality is as we go through these one another's and bearing with one another that God sees our hearts.

And I wonder sometimes when we consider whether we're going to as I said put up one another in a positive way not a negative way. We're really saying in our hearts I don't get mad I get even again I'm just trying to get us to think about how these things these one another's are they're not like they're not light and fluffy.

They're for us to really because I think that's where we really struggle. Wouldn't you agree. In the church let me put it this way in the churches isn't that easier to demonstrate Christian character.

And are we not again just asking are we not all a little bit on God that we don't let anything slip when we're with one another. I don't get mad brother get even come on you know I'm saying what I'm saying is true.

We all put on a certain outward appearance right. And yet God knows our hearts. So are we really loving one another we really serving with all we really caring for one another. Or are we doing that because that's the thing we ought to do just something to think about again trying to drill down a little bit and and get us to think about things in a little bit different way.

Unity, Peace, and the Call to Love

Okay now the next point I want to make is this that bearing on one another in those two passages has the meanings that we wrote down here of certain things. But I want you to see the one of the main points in why that is so important.

So look at this again in Ephesians I therefore the prisoner of the Lord beseech you to have a walk worthy of the calling in which you were called with all lowliness and gentleness and long-suffering bearing with one another in love look verse 3 endeavoring to keep the unity of the spirit in the bond of peace.

And you keep going on there's one body and one spirit you will call the one hope of your calling and one Lord one faith one baptism one God and father of all who is above all through all. And in you will that these things that we are considering over these months are meant to produce something not just Christian character and not just transform our lives but it is promote unity within the body.

And you remember those remember how description speak about the things that God hates. Right. Six things the Lord hates. A seven hour an abomination. Anybody remember what the last one is sowing discord among the brethren.

So think about that we need to be particularly careful with one another not only because we are responsible for our walk before God but we are responsible to promote unity. Because the opposite of unity is what this unity.

Right. Yeah. So we got to be careful about that because we are to again as the light on the hill as the as the city on the hill and then we are the light of the world. Could you imagine when if someone walks into our church and I'll go back to what you know brother Michael if what we're doing is biting devouring one another instead of instead of enduring with one another and bearing one another putting up with one another again in a positive way that we might promote unity so people might see that there is a distinction among us that we're separate from the world but not only that but we actually do care for one another.

It's not just something we we put on in an outward way and so he says that it says the unity of spirit in the bonds of peace. Any thoughts on that as far as. Well let me ask you let me put it this way and I think brother Mike would agree one of the reasons why we chose to do to one of those was because of its practical the hope of practical results.

Right. That we would because we would grow in grace. Because if you're gonna grow in grace then you're gonna do what you're gonna promote the glory of God and you're gonna promote unity. And in that in that way it is very practical.

Isn't it that we would do such a thing. Okay a couple minutes left I want you to go to Colossian passage now again where the other main passage for this thought of bearing one another let me just read it to you again because there's something a little different that's added in the Colossian passage that's not in the Ephesians passage although it's implied in the Ephesian passage it's just not specifically mentioned and you'll see it verse 12 Colossians chapter 3.

Therefore as the elect of God holy beloved put on tender mercies kindness humbleness of mind meekness long-suffering bearing with one another and forgiving one another. If anyone has a complaint against another even as Christ forgave you so you must also do.

But above all things put on love which is the bond of perfection. Remember the Ephesian passage had that same thought of of doing these things in love. The thing that's added in the Colossian passage is not specifically mentioned in the Ephesian passage is this thought of forgiveness.

And what I want to do with that is I want to mention it but I'm also going to defer. And what I mean by defer is we if you remember last week brother Mike we had some conversations about forgiveness and brother Mike's going to come back next week and and we're going to drill down a little bit further to forgive this.

So I want to kind of leave it to him to do that. But I do want to say this if we are going to put up with one another if what I said is true bearing one another has the idea of being patient and enduring standing firm and putting up then there's gonna have to be a great amount of of monks offering kindness gentleness meekness and forgiveness.

Because if not we're just going to become overcome by bitterness there's just going to be. And that's a dangerous thing. Wouldn't you agree that root that kind of starts to form and then somehow we water it a little bit and it gets a little bit bigger and before you know it it invades us.

And so we have we struggle with one another because we have all these other things we have so much other luggage that we don't we can't work on on the positives because we're so busy trying to deal with the negatives that are in our minds and in our hearts.

So and again if you were to think about it one of the things that strikes me is how we live in such a day when there's so little forgiveness. I think of it when I watch people drive well I'll tell you you you infringe in someone's ass face and it don't take.

I mean it's it's a man you think about it. It's amazing. Almost every single day there is road rage shooting somewhere people are so unwilling to put up with anything and they don't forgive them matter of fact they get even we live in a world of such deficiency when it comes to the graces and and forgiveness is certainly one of them.

I mean it wasn't that long ago I read a somebody cut somebody off and the guy actually followed that person home to kill him. Imagine that you talk about raging inside. There was no putting up with it was there was a desire for for vengeance.

And so especially as we as we consider that my friends we live in a in such a bad if you will a bad time in that sense. And so bearing with one another as I said it should be transformative in our lives.

We should learn to be able to put up with one another. And here's what I mean by that. And I'm gonna quote from from somebody who wrote on that. But think about this. God has created us all so unique right different.

God has created us male female young in position we're in as he puts us in front of young old in between long hair no hair long beards some beard all kinds of things. And wouldn't you all agree that we're all a little peculiar or am I the most peculiar person in the world.

You cannot answer that question. No I was looking my wife I'm worried about you but you don't know me as well. She does. But we're all a little bit weird right. We all got it we all got our own right.

Right. And some of those personality things are yeah and some are actually frustrating to other people in their personality right. And I'm not diving into the well of trouble here but see when I walk into my house I put my keys wherever I think of putting them so sometimes they're in my room sometimes they're on the island sometimes I might even leave them over here but you know what in three seconds they're in the drawer where they're supposed to be because she puts up with me.

But to me it's in my world whether I put the keys this way or that way or this room without room. But there's a consequence to that right. Because then I say and I said it to her there they baby you know what my keys are.

If you put them where they should have been you would have known where they were because that's the right way. Listen our personalities especially in the church or particularly the church or in any relationship have to be of such grace of all these one another's.

And certainly this I thought of putting up with one another in a positive way and not being flustered standing or acting you've been you not. You're not shaking it anyway. Let me read to you what one commentator said about this.

He said this and this was in the relationship of a husband and wife. And he says such is the imperfection of human nature. One can find enough in each other to in bitter life if they choose to magnify imperfections and to become irritated at trifles.

And there is no friendship that may not be marred in this way if we will allow it. Hence if we would have life move on smoothly we must learn to bear and forbear. We must indulge the friend that we love in the little peculiar in the in that word of saying and doing things which may be important to him but may be of little moment to us like children we must suffer each other to build his playhouse in his own way and not quarrel with him because he does not think our way is the best.

Oh that's a pretty potent statement. And I think we need to consider that particularly in the Church of Christ because again the Church of Christ is to exemplify the right relationship of people with God.

And certainly if it's if I put it this way if you're not in a right relationship with your wife or your husband or your family you're gonna have a hard time being a right relationship with the church it will evidence itself it'll come out somewhere along the way.

But I particularly like where he says we must suffer each one to build this playhouse in his own way. So this whole idea of putting up and standing firm that bearing one another is not just yeah all right do what you all way it's okay you're different than me.

I'm not gonna be phased by it now again there are things that we would say are essential that we cannot just brush away right. And then but there's that whole area of of well in the church in the whole area of liberty right.

So and you know the saying right so and things essential what unity in things not essential liberty in all things charity. Right. If you don't know that saying by the way memorize that because it's a deep well true but if you and I think about it as Paul writes this and as he writes it both in Ephesians and Colossians where he talks about this and he's saying as the elected God Holy and Beloved put on certain things after he's told us to put off certain things right.

Because you can't put on unless you put off. So if we're not going to be putting on humbleness of mind and bearing on another then then what are we gonna have. We're gonna have exactly what he talks about wrath and malice and envy and hatred and all those other things but bearing on another forgiving one another.

If anyone has a complaint against another even as Christ forgave you so you must also so you must do but above all things put on love which is the bond of perfection. And then you can continue reading and you can see how these things interconnect and let the peace of God rule in your hearts to which you were called in one body be thankful again that we don't stumble over things so so easily that we we give each other if you will we give each other enough space.

And then if someone invades my space many many years ago when I was working in transportation I was a manager and I had people working anyway I had to become a Smith system trainer. Anybody ever hear of Smith system.

It's a driver awareness course what it is. It's not a defensive driving. It's actually a positive driving cost. And there's five keys to this all good kids like milk. And it's it has thoughts about how you need to create a space cushion when you drive and how if you maintain that space cushion you basically will keep yourself safe and you will keep others safe.

And one of the premises of that is as people take your space cushion from you rather than getting mad at them taking your space cushion you back out and you recreate that space cushion. And I have found over the years that what it does do is it not only makes me feel safer makes me feel better.

I'm not as agile. Do you ever drive in a car with somebody that you're not happy to with their way they drive. Oh I don't care. Husbands and wives are you all happy with how your mate drives. If they drive don't start it now.

I'm gonna start this fire before I leave. No but but they're up here matter of fact I'm gonna say who did. But me can't talk about someone's money. Then when I get in the car with them I'm always looking for that handle.

And the thing that really gets me is they're always complaining about how other people drive and I'm scared to death driving in the car with him. And so I got a bear up with him. So when brother Mike pulls out here at 438 miles an hour just get out of his way.

So that's right. My whole point is brother sisters because that this idea of bearing or one another has a very positive aspect to it. It's not just I'll take it on the chin. That's not the thought. The thought is as we would be lowly and meek and humble and gentle as we're walking in the light of who we are that God has called us out of darkness into his marvelous light as we would consider that we ought to be promoters of unity and not disunity that we would realize that that bearing up with one another even as Christ bears up with us.

And that's why he brings in the forgiveness which again brother Mike will will open up a little bit more. So remember in many things we all stumble remember that's what James says. And we ought to be slow to speak slow to wrath and what.

Swift to hear. But I think we do we change things around right. I know for myself I'm too quick to speak too quick to wrath too slow to hear. But maybe we we can look at these one another as we go through them to finish them out over the next course of a few months and and find some some real positive practical instruction for us.

So is it. Okay bro. Okay good. We were a little concerned about animals. So brother Mike ran over there and she seems to be okay. So that's good all. Right. Let's just close with a word of prayer and we'll continue in our worship brother again thank you for a day.

Thank you for who we are.