Right Thinking About Sex

Welcome to No Compromise Radio, a ministry coming to you from Bethlehem Bible Church in West Boylston.

No Compromise Radio is a program dedicated to the ongoing proclamation of Jesus Christ, based on the theme in Galatians 2, verse 5, where the

Apostle Paul said, But we did not yield in subjection to them for even an hour, so that the truth of the gospel would remain with you.

In short, if you like smooth, watered -down words to make you simply feel good, this show isn't for you.

By purpose, we are first biblical, but we can also be controversial. Stay tuned for the next 25 minutes as we're called by the divine trumpet to summon the troops for the honor and glory of her

King. Here's our host, Pastor Mike Abendroth. Welcome to No Compromise Radio ministry.

My name is Mike Abendroth, and it has been some time since we've had our little Facebook live group. I'm in the studio today.

Well, it's not really much of a studio, you can see. That's a studio, it's basically my office, my study.

And I'm trying to record a few shows. So I try to record four new shows a week. Thank you for being patient this summer with some reruns.

I'm thankful for Spencer and his, I think it was a summer with Jonah and Ruth.

So Jonah and Ruth. For those of you who know some of the folks here at Bethlehem Bible Church and No Compromise Radio, my wife and I and two daughters spent time with Ezra and Lauren Mel in Hawaii.

That was fun to see their four kids, one on the way, and it was fun running around with those kids.

And what a neat couple. And it's always good to know people in Hawaii, right? And then we spent some time in Northern California, some in Southern California.

My daughter, Grace, and my daughter, Maddie, are at the Master's University, and my son,

Luke, lives right by the Master's University, but has a full -time job and serves on high school staff at Grace.

So anyway, it was good to see them, good to hang out, good to have a couple bike crashes.

I'm getting too old for this. Yikes. What do we have here to kind of catch up?

Not this coming February, but our plan is for February 2021,

Omaha Bible Church, Bethlehem Bible Church and No Compromise Radio, off to Israel.

And I'm trying to work it so that we get a Rome extension.

So on the way back from Tel Aviv, we could stop at Rome, and that's one of my all -time favorite cities, because it's got the style, it's got the food, it's got the history, but there's also enough biblical history in there.

I mean, besides Rome having its Catholicism and the Vatican and all that, which is interesting to me,

I obviously don't agree with it, but it's interesting. There's stuff there with the Mamertine prison and the lore with Paul.

You've got the Three Fountains Church, south of Rome, where supposedly Paul was beheaded. You have the arch that's got some of the arch candelabra there near the

Colosseum. So anyway, I can't remember what that's exactly called. I think it's

Titus's Arch, is what it is. Not like 1 Timothy, 2 Timothy, Titus, but 70

AD Titus, where we have the destruction of Jerusalem. So that's kind of what we have here.

You can always write us, info at nocompromiseradio .com. And we are probably going to be back in the book of Hebrews sometime soon, but today

I wanted to think a little bit about Proverbs, and specifically Proverbs chapter 5.

I don't know if you do this or not, but I regularly say to myself, well, today's the 24th and today actually is the 24th of August.

The FaceTime people know that, but the radio show people don't know that because I think this will be played next week.

Then you read the 24th Proverb, right? You read a few Psalms, Proverbs.

Today I was reading Genesis 9, because that's a scripture reading for tomorrow and Colossians chapter 3.

I was thinking about 1 Kings 9 and following and listening to some of that. I was also reading, what was

I reading? Something else. Anyway, it doesn't matter. Anyway, here's what I want you to think about. I want you to think about the

Proverbs Christianly. I want you to think about them in the framework of all the

Bible. In other words, there are two ways to think about things in scripture generally. One is law.

Do this. Obey. Commands. Imperatives. The other would be gospel. This is what

God has done for you in the person and work of Christ Jesus. So law, do, gospel, done.

Of course, you would know right away that gospel means good news, and good news can't be due because we can't do things perfectly, and that's what

God expects. We can't do things perpetually in a perfect fashion because that's what God expects. We can't do things in a perpetually perfect entire way because that's what

God expects. And we can't do things in a perfectly perpetual entirely personal way because that's what

God expects. So law isn't good news. Law is holy. Law is right because it comes from the law giver.

Never think of the law without thinking God needs perfect obedience regarding this law keeping to stand before him.

That's why we need the work of another, Christ Jesus. And then also remember that the law comes from the law giver.

And the law giver, for unbelievers, is a judge. That's why he requires perfect obedience.

And the law giver, when it comes to thinking about who Jesus is, the law giver, because now we're born again, comes from a father, comes from the

Savior, and then we can have it as a guide and we can fall short and still not lose our position or our legal standing.

Does that make sense? So to summarize that, you have law either from the judge, perfectly obey, or law from the father slash

Savior, my son has obeyed in your place and I see you in light of perfectly keeping that law and therefore now love me and love neighbor.

But you don't have to do that perfectly because you never could. You just have one who has done that in your stead.

So now we go to Proverbs and we see all kinds of commands. So my point really today is when you look at the

Bible and you see all these commands and which one of those categories would these commands in most of the

Proverbs fit? I know there's good news in the Proverbs, but typically, and I'm looking at Proverbs chapter five today, there are all these commands, son, listen to my word.

Josh just said, dear pastors, more redemptive preaching in Proverbs. So the way

I like to frame things when I'm thinking about Proverbs, especially in this particular Proverb, Proverb five, that would talk about sexual sin and sexual joy in marriage, the sin part outside of marriage, the joy in marriage, is if you think about Ephesians chapter five, forever now you'll think about Proverbs and these other passages that talk about sexual sin rightly.

So let me just read to you Ephesians chapter five verses one through, oh, about six or so, and you'll see what he does.

You'll see how Paul frames these things. I mean, Paul had the Proverbs and Paul had an understanding of the

Proverbs and listen to what he says. Therefore, be imitators of God as beloved children and walk in love as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us, a fragrant offering and a sacrifice to God.

And so what Paul says is, I want you to imitate God and God's love is a self giving love.

God's love is an agape love. God's love is, I want what's best for the object of my love.

And that's how Christ loved us, right? And gave himself for God so loved the world he gave and now the son he gives.

And so do you see what Paul's going to do here? It's fascinating. Verse three, but sexual immorality and all impurity or covetousness must not even be named among you as is proper among saints.

You see what he's doing? That's fascinating. God's love gives God love.

God's love is a self sacrificial. God's love isn't like the sexual sin that takes.

Sexual sin takes, sexual sin uses, sexual sin doesn't say

I want what's best for the other person. I want what's best for me. That's what sexual sin does.

And what Paul is doing here, and this is how we want you to see the Proverbs, because it's hard to read the

Proverbs now, you know, not in light of all the other books of the Bible, including the New Testament and who we are in Christ Jesus and union with Christ and ability to obey and understanding the difference between legal standing and fruits and evidence.

Imitate God by sacrificial giving of yourself. That's what he's after, not the sexual sin.

So you can imagine, and I know ladies do this now too, but a man who's looking at pornography, you can ask yourself, is that agape love or is that a selfless love?

No. Self sacrificial love? No. Selfish love? Absolutely. So that's what

Paul is trying to show. You want to imitate God. How? Do you want to imitate his simplicity, his impassibility, his immutability?

No, the text is very clear. Verse two, walking in love. Paul has that idea.

Remember you had the teacher that would walk back and forth, peripatetic walking. That's how they would teach.

Here's that kind of walking. He's not talking about, well, if you're in a wheelchair and you can't walk, he's not talking about anything except a lifestyle.

This is a lifestyle. This is a pattern. This is a behavior in general.

This is just biblical language for, if you see it in chapter four of verse one, entreats you to walk in a manner worthy of your calling.

Paul gives the Christ -like example, the supreme example, sacrificing his life on behalf of others.

That's how a sexual love should be seen. Not self -taking, not self -gratifying, not selfish, but giving yourself.

And so, of course, it doesn't take very long for you to think, okay, in the marriage bed, Hebrews chapter 13, verse four, 1

Corinthians chapter seven, verses one through five, that I am here to please my spouse, and if the spouse is there to please the other spouse, everything's going to work out just fine.

Here he willingly, the son, gives himself up for Genesis through Revelation, talks about,

I wanted to say John, but I said Genesis, so I'm just trying to make up something. I saw Galatians here.

Galatians 2 .20, who loved me and gave himself for me. John 15 .13, greater love hath no man than this, than a man lay down his life for his friends.

First John 3 .16, we know love by this, that he laid down his life for us, and we ought to lay down our lives for the brethren.

And then he gives hupere language, substituting a language for dying in place of, on behalf of, in our stead, in place of, as an offering and sacrifice to God.

And this is a love that gives. This is a love that, what's the text say? It's like a fragrant aroma, a sweet, swelling, sweet, swelling aroma.

I was listening, reading a Carl Truman article the other day, and he said sometimes he just burst out into laughter by himself, and I thought, you know what, we haven't had him on NOCO for quite some time.

This is the sweet, smelling aroma that pleases the

Father. Sacrificial giving. Sacrificial giving of oneself.

Sacrifice that imitates and emulates the Lord Jesus. I have a friend in Rome, he's a pastor there, and I saw him at the

Shepherds Conference, and I knew he was my friend Lucio because he was the most handsome man at the

Shepherds Conference, it's true, and he dressed the nicest. You could tell he was just from Rome.

And so I gave him a hug, and I was so glad to see him, and our family spent some time with his family in Rome before, and elsewhere, and I said,

Lucio, that is a great, because I held him for, you know, like, it was an embrace of I haven't seen you for such a long time, and it's so good to see you, and I said, you smell great,

I need to know what kind of cologne that is. You know, in the old days, I would never say anything like that, I'd be concerned about what they might be thinking, or code, or etiquette, or something like that, but I wanted to know what kind of cologne he had on, and of course, guess what it was?

I mean, it wasn't Jovan Musk, it wasn't Old Spice, this is kind of a bad head gear thing going on here.

What was it? It was Armani. Of course, it was aqua something, Armani, and I looked it up to see how much it was, like 150 bucks.

But you know what? What if you lived in Rome, and you weren't handsome, and you didn't dress well, and you didn't wear

Armani cologne? I mean, that just smelled so good. This is, to use the figurative language, to use the language of accommodation here in Scripture, and you think about God smelling sacrifices in the

Old Testament that were pleasing to him because they were spotless, and they were blemish -less, and they were

Josh's and Tommy's. Although, I think you can get some of that at Marshall's pretty cheaply.

Actually, I told somebody about that, that encounter that I had with Lucio, and somebody got some free cologne.

They didn't have to pay for it, but they got some free Armani aqua, and so that's what I wear now on Sundays. I don't wear it regularly.

It's special, it's sanctified, it's set apart, it's Sunday only, Armani. I have to spray it on Saturday night because of the

Sabbath, because I think if you spray one time, it's okay on Sunday. Three times, it's breaking the Sabbath, because that's work.

By the way, it smells so good, sometimes Kim sneaks it, and she wears it too. What's happening here is sexual immorality, verse 3, impurity, covetousness, filthiness, foolish talk, crude joking.

Paul says in verse 5, for you may be sure of this, that everyone who is sexually immoral or impure or is covetous, that is an idolater, has no inheritance in the kingdom of God and Christ.

Well, but I know a friend, or what about this person? Verse 6, let no one deceive you with empty words, for because of these things, the wrath of God comes on the sons of disobedience.

We're talking about a walking in a pattern of, I'm not saying somebody has done this once or slipped up or done it several times and repented, it's not my point, but this is a standing before God because they're showing their life they don't have a righteous standing because they're not living out from that and because of their standing with the

Lord. So the point is, when I look back to Proverbs, I say to myself, oh,

I'm going to see this from a Christian perspective. I'm going to read the book of Proverbs and I will say to myself, okay,

I understand that these commands aren't just raw commands. They're not just morality.

They're not just Jewish, right? Because if I preach or think about Proverbs 5 in a way that maybe my

Jewish friends who are unregenerate would say, oh yeah, we do that. That's right. I mean, can you think about how many people, do

Mormons say, run from sexual immorality and enjoy your wife?

This live stuff kills you.

Yes, because people have a conscience and they have this written on their heart and they understand what it's like and they see what sex sins do across the world.

But how do we think about this in a Christian fashion? So, you know, you could think about it union with Christ, but I'm thinking about it in an

Ephesians way as Paul is framing everything with law and gospel.

If you want indicative as imperatives, because you're afraid of Luther, I guess you could talk about it that way as well.

Imitate God sexually. That is in light of who God is, how do I act sexually?

I run from immorality and I enjoy sexual morality. That is with your wife. Instead of selfish, it's self -less.

And it's quite the contrast because sexual, sinful relationships don't imitate

God. Who was the musician just not long ago, or maybe it was some

Bachelorette thing or something Bachelorette. I don't watch it. You know, every good respecting, you know, no -cope host has to say, well,

I don't watch the Bachelorette. But I've seen stories about it because when the Christian word comes across, it's fascinating to me.

And I think one of the ladies said something like, well, I don't know how you can judge me. I'm a Christian and I still have, you know, relations with men and blah, blah, blah, but Jesus loves me anyway.

I mean, it's something like that. I mean, you can just see, well, what I would say to that person is that the opposite of love is take.

The opposite of love is selfish. Love is a self -sacrificial giving and sexual sin does not imitate

God and does not walk in love. That's what Paul is saying. So now when

I go to Proverbs 5, but the show's already over, I can frame it rightly.

When I would preach this, I wouldn't talk about, well, just do these things and that's the end, right?

I should talk about motivation to do them. That would be one particular way I could talk about the

Lord Jesus when I'm preaching Proverbs 5. Right? You think of guilt, grace, and gratitude and all the sexual sins that I've ever committed, that you've committed with your mind or body.

The Lord Jesus has paid for those. Can you imagine? Can you imagine sexual sin and how selfish it is and yet how the

Lord Jesus would purchase us, would bear those sins on his body, on the tree?

He didn't have to, but he just did. He willingly went and he knew how excruciating that would be when it comes to the wrath of God poured out on him.

He knew that in the garden. He knew it in eternity past. He knew it actually experientially at the cross.

And so if somebody would do that for me, then I want to respond with gratitude, right?

Guilt, grace, gratitude. That would be a way to do it. Union with Christ would be another way to do it. Ephesians, in Christ, in Christ, in Christ, in Christ.

Now I have not only the motivation, but I also have a desire and I also have the ability, right?

Because I'm in Christ. I have the Holy Spirit because he dwells within me. And I can say, no, the power of sin is not enslaving now to me,

Romans chapter 6. I'm able to because of justification declares me righteous and then sanctification with the

Holy Spirit does in my life. I'm able to do these things. So the point is when I look at Proverbs, I don't just go to Proverbs and go, you know what?

Whatever it says, it's just a command. I want to see those commands in light of the command giver.

I think that'd be the point, right? Did I say that earlier today? I think I did. These laws are given from a gracious father because of the work of the son applied by the spirit.

And in light of that, I want to obey. I want to, here's how Proverbs 5 folds out and we'll talk about it more in just a few minutes for show two.

I've got two shows to do today. I've got a list of things to do. What do I have to do? I have to clean out the air conditioner. My wife's out of town, so I've got to get these things done.

Clean out the air conditioner, kind of vacuum it out, the outside AC. I have to mow. The yard's smaller now because we're doing some new construction.

Need to review my sermon. Oh, I'm doing that now. Bicycle ride.

Got lots of podcasts to listen to. I've been listening to Pat Abendroth, by the way, at Omaha Bible Church. Christ is

Better. Pull up Omaha Bible Church. Scroll down. It's about a year ago. Christ is Better 1, 2, 3, 4, 5,

I think. Really good. I think you'll be encouraged. Uncle Pat is what I call him. Uncle Pat. I think

I called him when I was younger, Fat Pat the Sewer Rat, but he was never fat, so how did that all work out? I wonder what he'd call me.

So I don't have any idea what I'm talking about except back to Proverbs. I'm looking at Proverbs in light of who

I am. Oh, Proverbs outline. Avoid sexual immorality. That's the first half of the

Proverb 5, Proverbs 5. Second half is enjoy sexual morality.

This is a very interesting thing to me because God's sexual ethic, you, Christian, your sexual ethic, my sexual ethic cannot be don't, cannot be stop, cannot be never, cannot be the negative side.

Remember, God has created bodies, a male body and a female body, and he has been very kind and the bodies that he has given us are sexual bodies, and they're designed to please one another, and it doesn't take you very long to kind of work through this process where you think, okay, therefore, the sexual ethic can't just be no.

Solomon's teaching the Son, and of course, Jesus, when he came along, he could have said, by the way, don't listen to anything

Solomon has said in Proverbs 5 because the guy had many wives, 300, 700 concubines, or as one kid said, 700 porcupines.

What's the difference? But no, he affirmed Proverbs. He affirmed that this is, you know,

Solomon was a hypocrite, and he didn't do everything he said, but when he wrote the scripture, he wrote scripture.

The Spirit of God was moved him, was moving him. Second Peter, chapter 1, verses 19 through 21, therefore, the sexual ethic that we're going to see next show, as I wrap this up in about a minute and a half, there's more to sexual ethic than just don't.

Of course, if you're in a relationship where you're not married, well, the answer is no, don't, run,

Joseph, flee, sexual immorality, 1 Corinthians 6, 1 Thessalonians 4. That's true.

But there's a positive side, right? And you can even think of Paul in Ephesians, Paul in Pauline doctrine, put off, put on.

He's not just saying, stop, God, interestingly, God has given people the desire for sex.

God has given hormones for men. He's given, I think women even have a small amount of testosterone. He's given testosterone and he's given both men and women the desire for intimacy.

That's a God given thing, but it has to be channeled in the right direction. The marriage bed is undefiled,

Hebrews chapter 13. Therefore, I think we have to do, and I put this in the book, Sexual Fidelity, we need to talk to our children.

This is a father talking to the son. We need to discuss these things. And I know many dads that don't want to get embarrassed, therefore they never talk to their kids.

So, at the risk of your own embarrassment, you don't help your children. I think that's bad form.

I would rather be embarrassed and then tell my children about that in a proper place at a proper time, in the proper setting, with mom sitting there, the

Bible open, and that's the way we'll do it. My name is Mike Abendroth, No Compromise Radio for Facebook people.

I'll see you in about two minutes. No Compromise Radio with Pastor Mike Abendroth is a production of Bethlehem Bible Church in West Boylston.

Bethlehem Bible Church is a Bible teaching church firmly committed to unleashing the life -transforming power of God's Word through verse -by -verse exposition of the sacred text.

Please come and join us. Our service times are Sunday morning at 1015 and in the evening at 6. We're right on Route 110 in West Boylston.

You can check us out online at bbchurch .org or by phone at 508 -835 -3400.