Q&A Re Ray Comfort and Others

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Welcome to No Compromise Radio, a ministry coming to you from Bethlehem Bible Church in West Boylston.

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No Compromise Radio is a program dedicated to the ongoing proclamation of Jesus Christ, based on the theme in Galatians 2, verse 5, where the

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Apostle Paul said, �But we did not yield in subjection to them for even an hour, so that the truth of the gospel would remain with you.�

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In short, if you like smooth, watered -down words to make you simply feel good, this show isn�t for you.

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By purpose, we are first biblical, but we can also be controversial. Stay tuned for the next 25 minutes as we�re called by the

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Divine Trumpet to summon the troops for the honor and glory of her King. Here�s our host, Pastor Mike Abendroth.

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Welcome to No Compromise Radio, a ministry. My name is Mike Abendroth, and Fred Butler was bugging me, �When are you going to do some new shows ?�

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So here you go, Fred, this one�s for you. Actually, probably more times in the last three weeks, more time in the last three weeks than in the last six years,

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I�ve thought, �Do I really want to do a daily radio show ?� So this is not some fake appeal or something like that.

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I�ll probably still continue on, but it�s crossed my mind, and so the morale better go up or the beatings are going to continue to mix up a little phrase.

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I guess the giving better go up. It can only go up from here. Anyway, I�m just tired, involved with other ministry things here at the church, and so if you think the show could be better,

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I�m sure it could. This is kind of an afterthought. It is an overflow.

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It�s an afterglow of Bethlehem Bible Church, but that is actually true, and so we just do what we can, and today

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I have a few things I need to clear off my desk, and so I like those days because I just have things that are here, and I never prepare for other shows, so I don�t prepare for this one either, but I have some emails.

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I�m glad when you email me. Spencer gets the emails, and then I am the recipient of those once a week.

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I think on Mondays, he sends them to me, except the ones that are mean. You know, you don�t use

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King James, therefore you�re blasphemous. You have a skull on your desk, therefore you�re satanic. You�re called no compromise, but you use worldly intro music.

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I�m sure they had to use the SoundHound kind of app to figure out what that song was.

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I�m going to change that song to even a more secular song just for him. I think I should probably tell him that classical music is written by pagans, most of it.

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So today, all right, what do we have? Dear Pastor Mike, thank you.

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Oh, it says, I know some people complain, but I love the humor. Keep up the good work. Is that a couch complaint?

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I do love the word. I don�t love the topic or the idea, especially in myself, of complaining, but I love one of the

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Greek words for it, agungismus, that�s the, I think the noun form.

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And there�s something else that people murmured, Luke chapter 19, but it�s got a different prefix to it, but still it�s got the

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G -O -G -G, a gamma, a homicron, gamma, gamma. I think that�s the first time

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I�ve ever pronounced Greek letters here in No Compromise Radio.

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I just was trying to freshen up on my Hebrew, my son Luke, whom you�ve heard here on No Compromise Radio, is in Israel for Master�s College IBEX program.

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TMC is not the marriage college, it�s the Master�s College. And you can, for the price of tuition and books, the normal price, tuition and board, room and board, you just pay for the flight and can study in Israel for the whole semester.

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I mean, how about that? I am so sold on the Master�s College if you are looking for a college.

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I do not want you to beg, borrow or steal for the money, but I want you to beg or borrow. Well, since it�s

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No Compromise, we don�t ask for money or beg, so you just have to borrow. That�s what I did. I didn�t steal to get the money to send

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Luke to school. I didn�t beg, although I thought about it. I knew some people that might be � they might not be savvy to my advances for cash, payola.

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But we did borrow. So anyway, and I know some people complain, but I love the humor.

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I love your humidor. Is that what this said? Keep up the good work.

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Okay, here�s the real question. I�ve not found or heard you ever discuss the issue of whether or not heavy pornography use by a spouse is biblical grounds for divorce.

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And so the email continues, but let�s just stop there for a second. I�m not going to address that particular subject in the book, but the new

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No Compromise book, the first NoCo Media book out, No Compromise series.

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We�ll have one probably on parenting and marriage and men�s discipleship and local church kind of things.

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But the first one is on sexual fidelity. There are 30 chapters in the book, short chapters, each talking about a particular topic in a

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NoCo format style. I think the most technical book probably I ever wrote was the Romans commentary for S.

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Lewis Johnson and then maybe the one about Jesus as king. The things that go bump in the church with John and Archer is a little more

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NoCo -ish. But there is a chapter on pornography and how to think through that issue biblically and through the lens of union with Christ in the gospel.

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But what about heavy pornography use? I don�t really know what heavy is. Of course, that�s why if you�re doing counseling or you�re sitting down over a coffee, what does heavy mean?

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What do they mean by pornography? I�m not trying to say it depends what the word is. I don�t mean that.

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What do you mean pornography? I like sports, not as much as I used to.

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Sports Illustrated was always a staple in my life. Now I think I need to go look at a different view of an

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ESPN article or I have on my app scorecard and I want to see what

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Sports Illustrated says about it. But then I have to see things that I don�t really need to see. So I know that�s not pornography, although some of the issues,

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I�m sure, tilt toward that these days. But I don�t think that�s what this person means.

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So can you get divorced for pornography? So the word for sexual immorality that Jesus discusses in Matthew 5, does that cover pornography?

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I�ve also had people ask me, what if I�ve committed adultery or my spouse has committed adultery in their heart or if I�ve committed in my heart, now does my spouse have the biblical grounds for divorce or vice versa?

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Let�s see if they ask that as well. I�ve not found any good resources. Our church leadership is currently struggling with this issue and I have not yet found any good resources that address this issue in detail with in -depth biblical discussion.

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As you might expect, the Matthew 5, 27 to 28 text is where most of the debate comes from.

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Aren�t you supposed to end sentences and prepositions? Just kidding. That�s what you do when you want to stall and you need to try to open up your

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Bible to the passage. You have heard it said, you shall not commit adultery, but I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lustful intent has already committed adultery with her in his heart.

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And so that passage, of course, is not talking about divorce, but then some people like to take that verse and then inject it into the divorce passage that Jesus talks about in the next section, verse 31.

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It was also said, whoever divorces his wife, let him give her a certificate of divorce, but I say to you that everyone who divorces his wife, except on the grounds of sexual immorality, makes her commit adultery.

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And whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery. So here on No Compromise Radio, we�re going to read the last bit of this email.

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Is this adultery of the heart grounds for a biblically valid divorce? Oh, see, that is coming up.

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I would love to hear this discussed on NoCo. Okay, you know where to send your money now. And we�d also like to know if you are aware of any books post -other typo that dive into this issue and would be suitable for study by an elder board.

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Well, I don�t think Chalice, you know, Chalice has that free e -book about pornography that I think, you know, the dangers of pornography and forgiveness found in Christ through that.

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Obviously, this is an epidemic in churches and it is now affecting women as well, not to the same degree for a variety of reasons, but it is affecting ladies.

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You can tell a culture is collapsing when the women start going haywire in this regard.

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See Romans chapter 1. But here�s what I would say. I would say that if we allow biblical divorce for heart adultery, let�s call it that,

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I mean, clothes stayed on and only one person was involved, right?

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So if someone looks at someone with lust, the other person might not even know you�re looking.

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And so in real adultery, breaking the marriage vow is with another person and it is with clothes off, if I can put it that way, because I�m trying to walk with my words in a circumspect manner, circumspectly.

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You know, when people are editors who listen to you and others who speak for a living and then you just try to talk for 30 minutes a day, they�re bound to catch something, bound to catch them off guard somehow.

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May I throw in a few Latin words here or there. So I don�t think that is a proper way.

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We would not allow that at our church. A lady couldn�t say my husband looked at someone with lust, he committed adultery, he confessed it to me and I want a divorce.

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Well, maybe you want divorces for other reasons, but this is just your free get out of jail slash ball and chain marriage for free.

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Who hasn�t? I cannot imagine and maybe there is someone, I don�t know, maybe of course someone with a gift of celibacy or something.

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I don�t know and again, this is anecdotal evidence and through my eyes.

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And in my experience, I don�t know of anybody who hasn�t. I mean, how many times does it take for it to happen?

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And so people look at and my guess is, and I don�t want to be sexist, but I�m just guessing that men struggle with it more than women, but with some of these romance novels.

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I don�t know, what do they talk about in Amish romance novels? Heavy on the Amish and not so much on the romance, but I don�t think so.

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I think a lot of those books are probably written by unbelieving Amish people or just unbelievers and they mix the two things and then people feel spiritual, but I could talk about romance novels another day.

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So it would not be appropriate because I think Jesus, what we�re after is this and I know the

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Greek word in Matthew 5. I think Jesus is after real adultery when he talks about this in Matthew chapter 19 as well.

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I think what�s happening is if someone is enslaved to pornography, it�s a marriage breaker basically.

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You can imagine, let�s just use the male. The male is involved and enslaved in pornography.

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His wife goes to sleep and he goes downstairs and hovers over the pixels in his basement, checking over his shoulders frantically once in a while if he hears a creak in the floor.

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Well, that�s a sad case, I know, but Christians do sin and Christians sin sexually.

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I�m not saying it�s right to do that. I�m not saying that at all. I�m very thankful that before I was saved �

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I�m not thankful for this, but hear me out. Before I was saved, we had to go buy pornography and I would feel because of cultural things and maybe my background.

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If I didn�t do it very often, I liked if somebody would just give me their old magazine or something.

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I�d go to some store and then you feel weird at the checkout line, right? But now you don�t need to do that because people can just do it online and observe online and nobody seems to know, allegedly.

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Well, once I got saved, many things

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I still struggled with, but I was glad it was a struggle, right? So as Christians, we have

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Jesus Christ, the righteous one, our advocate. So if we do sin, we have someone who�s already propitiated the wrath of God and we just need a parental cleansing, not a judicial cleansing, nothing like that.

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And I got saved and lots of things I just stopped doing. I stopped cursing, sometimes with my mind.

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I was upset the other day and in my mind, I think I said a couple of swear words, but they didn�t come out of my mouth.

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And so at least there�s a little control there. And of course, the struggle is good for Christians because before you were a Christian, you didn�t struggle.

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You just let things go. And one of the things that I have been pretty much cured of is pornography.

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And what I mean by pretty much cured of, I don�t look at pornography and I haven�t since I�ve become a

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Christian. And unless it was inadvertent, when I used to have Adele, something would pop up on the screen and I would tell my wife or I would tell

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Steve, my associate, �You know that guy, don�t you? Tuesday guy.� But what I have not been cured of is

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I haven�t been cured of being careful on how I look at another lady. So there�s a variety of things that I try to do.

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So I don�t look. So what I do is I try to look at my wife.

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And again, this is a family -oriented show, but I think there�s a way a dad can look at a wife even when the kids are around.

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I don�t do anything inappropriate in front of my four kids, but that does not mean I don�t know.

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Here comes all the double negatives. I like to kiss my wife in front of the kids, appropriate kissing.

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I like to hug her. I like to give her a swat on the backside in a loving, playful way.

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And that�s about as far as it goes, obviously, in front of the kids. But if I can�t look at other ladies, but I can look at my wife, then

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I try to look at my wife on a regular basis. And so that�s one of the things I do. I also think to myself,

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I have three daughters and I don�t like it if I catch some guy with his eyes drooling over my daughters and sizing them up from top to bottom, right?

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From the head down to their shoes. That�s what I mean. What is that when you say from bottom to top or from north to south?

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Is that a merism? I think that is. Isn�t that fun? Isn�t that fun to know stuff about literature?

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So, I mean, there�s a few things like that that I try to do, but I haven�t been cured of that. I have to fight that.

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So, what do you do when you meet people who still struggle with pornography? I think it�s wrong to say, okay, wife, now

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I think the easy way out is to say, hey, he�s committed adultery in his heart. You�re done. Because the wife is thinking to herself,

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I�m not pretty anymore. I�m not sexy anymore. He doesn�t find me attractive anymore. He doesn�t find me romantic anymore.

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He doesn�t find me enticing anymore. And the list goes on and on and on. And it�s a bad deal.

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And I think a lot of pornography obviously is a testosterone -driven gone awry, but I think a lot of it has to do, as I write in my book, the new book that�s out, if it�s out by the time this is played,

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Fred, it�s laziness. So, instead of loving your wife and sacrificing for her and being kind to her, it is just easier for some men to just let the wife do what she wants.

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Why bother with all that other? But then when she turns a cold shoulder to you, literally and figuratively, then what do you do?

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So, the pixels are easier. What else does he say here? Matthew 5 .27.

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I wish I knew a book that I could recommend to talk about this more. But I think if you ask yourself the question, what�s

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Jesus mean for authorial intent on the ground of sexual immorality?

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Do you think he is thinking lustful intent that he talks about in the earlier verses of Matthew 5?

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Looks at a woman with lustful intent. I don�t think you�re going to be able to pull that trigger to make that connection.

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So, my name is Mike Apendroth. This is No Compromise Radio. We�re just looking at some emails. I get quite a few emails from folks like you.

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Matthew 19 also says whoever divorces his wife except for sexual immorality and marries another commits adultery.

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So, the good news is pornography, the use of pornography can be forgiven. It can be in your rearview mirror.

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I often talk to men about that. It needs to just be in your rearview mirror. One day, then the next day, then the next day.

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And off we go. All right, more to be said by the book.

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Email number two on No Compromise Radio. Good morning, Mike. My name is Maury. I�m married to Marcia for 38 years.

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Described his old church that he liked, and then he said my question for you is regarding Ray Comfort.

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I�ve never heard of him until getting to where I am now. They show some of his clips at our church.

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Our friends talk about him, his approach. What do you think? It says,

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I�ve only recently started listening to NOCO Radio, and thank you for that ministry. Anyway, thoughts on Ray Comfort would be appreciated.

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And if you have or Steve covered them in the radio cast, save your time and direct me to when it was.

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Thank you. Him we proclaim. Oh, great question. We have talked about it in the past before,

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Ray Comfort, and just a few things that I would like to say. It�s my show, right?

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Where�s Steve when I need him? You can just blame him. While I may have a few particular,

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I was going to say gripes, that�s too deep of a word. I might have a few differences with Ray.

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I�m sure he�s got a bunch of differences with me. I�m sure he could critique me a lot more. How am

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I to critique really beyond some just general things when he does so much more evangelism that I do?

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Now, maybe I�m supposed to be the pastor, and that�s my gifting and calling, and when but I think it�s fair to say he does more evangelism than I do, and so I want to be very careful because I think

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Ray�s a godly man. He�s had a lot of influence. He has trained a lot of people, and he is doctrinally pure, that is to say, whether Arminian or Calvinist.

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I mean, he�s not a Unitarian or a Deist or something like that. Financially, fidelity in his financial areas,

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I mean, there�s no scandals with Ray Comfort, and so I�m glad. I�m glad to call him a brother, and I�m glad for what he does for the kingdom.

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And what am I supposed to say? I have joined a gym recently, and I�ve got to preach the gospel a lot to people at the gym, and when

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I spot them doing 300 -pound bench presses and it�s stuck on their sternum,

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I just don�t let them up until they repent, so there�s easy. So, you could wonder about my style as well.

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His approach is fairly standard, and so he will use, to his credit, a lot about the law and what

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God requires. This is God�s holiness. He talks about Jesus as the only

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Savior, and Jesus dying on the cross and was raised from the dead. He talks about repentance and belief, and so generally,

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I don�t have too many beefs with him. I think he�s popular because when you watch him on TV, a lot of times it�s entertaining.

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It makes good for good TV, and I don�t think he�s trying to make good TV. That�s not my point, but it�s easy for people to watch, and we all want programs.

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We want systems, whether it�s EE. If you were to die tonight and stand before God and he were to ask you why should

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I let you in, what would you say? We just like it like that, and when I look at the New Testament, I see all different kinds of ways we evangelize, and let me use the two extremes.

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John the Baptist talks about repentance, and Jesus, and he�s austere, and he is out in the wilderness, and Jesus is, of course, he talks about repentance too, but he�s eating with sinners and tax collectors, and so you�ve got the love of God incarnate, and then you�ve got the love of God through his prophet

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John. So there�s a lot of different ways to talk about Jesus, and so his particular way is using the

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Ten Commandments and then telling people that they�ve broken those and that they need a

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Savior. So I would not use the Sabbath the way he does because I don�t think

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I�m Israel, and I don�t think the Sabbath laws are around anymore, and I wouldn�t use the lying one from the

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Second Commandment, from the second side of the tablet, because it�s not lying there in the Ten Commandments. It is what?

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Bearing false witness. Now you might say, �Is every lie bearing false witness, but is every false witness a lie ?�

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And you can argue like that. I�m just trying to say that I�m glad for Ray. I�m glad when he talks about Jesus and sin and Jesus as a sin bearer, but his style, not really my style.

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When I talk about the law, I regularly just use the summary of the law. Second one is loving your neighbor as yourself and then loving

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God with all your heart, soul, mind, and strength. And so that keeps me away from the Sabbath or lying.

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Sometimes it�s kind of a line that Ray uses about, �Well, you know, you�ve just admitted that you were a lying, lustful, cheating, whatever, whatever.�

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So he has that. So anyway, I think we ought to be careful. If we critique someone in such a way, we should do it in an uplifting fashion.

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I�m not critiquing him like I would a Joyce Meyer or somebody else who deserves the wood on a woodshed

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Friday. If I met Ray, probably one day, who knows? Maybe I�ll speak with him someplace or this, that, or the other.

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I would say, �Thank you, a good model for ministry and love for the lost, and I commend him for those things.�

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So if he�s not your cup of tea, or Ryder, it seems like he made a couple other comments where Ray wasn�t his cup of tea, then find someone else.

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It�s fine by me. Listen to from Sinclair Ferguson to S. Lewis Johnson to Martin Lloyd -Jones to MacArthur.

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There�s lots of people that you can listen to. And so what I should probably do is I should have Ray on No Compromise Radio, and I could ask him some of these questions.

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He�s probably got some good answers, probably better answers than I have, and he could speak for himself, and maybe we could arrange that.

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Well, my name is Mike Abendroth. This is No Compromise Radio, and you can write us at info at nocompromiseradio .com.

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Don�t forget, I think on the nocompromiseradio .com site, you�ll have the porthole to order the new book,

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Sexual Fidelity, No Compromise. That�s the name of it. And then you can order, and you can order that through the new

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NoCo Media. So NoCo Media will send that. That means I will send it.

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I personally will send it. I�m probably going to pay my kid to send it. I�m probably going to pay my children, you know, money to man the sending booth.