The Stereotypical College Professor

This is David Harris's description of a college professor. No, that's not what I'm talking about. I'm talking about college professors in general, just like... Alright, so this is how I imagine them. They're all like, you know, you know that they're all in like, they're at a planetarium or, you know, they're... you can picture them in your classroom or whatever.

And they're all... this is, I mean, like, they're all... number one, none of them are in their 60s and none of them are in their 40s. They're all in their 50s. They all used to be hippies. And now, they just, they don't use deodorant though, but they do have these button-up shirts, solid color, never multi-color, button-up, greens, grays.

They wear shorts generally, but if... they don't... never wear jeans. They don't wear jeans. They wear, like, the same material as their shirts going all the way down, or shorts. They wear these socks that come up to here.

They wear these shoes. They're not really tennis shoes. They're not really hiking shoes. They're just kind of just goober shoes. They... the men, there's different kinds of men. Some men have... some men are kind of shorter or, you know, average height.

They've got a nice big belly and a beard. And then there's a bunch of tall, thin guys. They wear, like, these kind of fishing hats, but not really, like, copycat fishing hat things that they think they're more, like, nature-like or whatever.

And they wear glasses and they're tall and thin and lanky. And then there's the women. The women, they... you can't tell them apart from the men. And then the... and they all just, like, there's, like, five of them and they're, like, at a planetarium or something or at, like, stargazers over there, like that.

They're all there. And then there's, like, this guy's saying, like, we just want to fight the U .S. Ranger. And then, like, you know, five of them clap. And it's just... it's so pathetic. Like, sometimes we think it's pathetic, like, in a church.

Sometimes when you have a kid who's, like, three years or, you know what, two years old goes up there and goes... And everybody's, like, yay! Clapping. And sometimes, because I'm really cynical, I roll my eyes.

I'm like, ugh. You know, can't we have some kind of a cutoff or something? And sometimes I think that's a little pathetic. I know it's wrong, but sometimes I do think that they are way worse. That's my rant.