Talkin' Eschatology with Dr. Layton Flours

Welcome to Eschatology Matters and the April Fools Interview

All right, welcome to Eschatology Matters, part of the Fight, Laugh, Feast Network. And we are unbelievably honored and privileged to have with us today the man, the myth, the legend, Dr. Leighton Flowers.

Dr. Flowers, you're looking a little different. Are you okay?

Well, yesterday I happened to visit a church that I didn't know was Calvinistic. And it was Easter Sunday, and I heard a Calvinistic sermon, and it is totally, I mean, I'm swole up. My voice is almost gone.

And you know, I didn't get to shave today. So I looked, my voice, I didn't get to shave today. And this is what happens after one day of not shaving. I'm a complete beast of a man. So you're getting me at the worst possible time, but I'm here for you guys.

I want to make sure that I represent Soteriology Matters. I mean, yeah, yeah, Soteriology 101, very well. So that's why I'm here.

Well, thank you for coming. I don't know if I can help you or not, but you know, that will happen. If we can give you some Calvinol, maybe that will take care of some of these symptoms that you're having.

Well, I tried a dose yesterday and it didn't work. So maybe I'll double up today.

Yeah, yeah. Just maybe take the whole bottle at this point. That might be what you need the most. Now, you kind of already touched on it a little bit, but of course, you're one of the most famous men, I think, when it comes to Soteriology.

You have your own show, Soteriology 101, and we've been talking to you and we would really like you to host Eschatology 101 as part of Eschatology Matters. What do you think of that?

What's your take on Eschatology? Well, I think I would solve a lot of your problems. I've listened to your show a lot. And if I had time to respond to it, I would. Because I spend 20 out of 24 hours in a day responding to James White, I really have to be careful to not, you know, overrun my time.

So I'd be happy to help if there were more hours in a day. And unfortunately, right now, they're completely booked.

You know, that's a full-time job, responding to James White. We completely understand. And we also understand that at one point in time, you were actually a Calvinist. Would you say that you were predestined to reject Calvinism?

Well, that's a funny question that you would ask, because my Calvinism came after hearing the John Piper sermon. And that John Piper sermon really turned me on to Calvinism. And then later, I found out that John Piper looks a lot like Bernie Sanders.

And because he looks like Bernie Sanders, I realized that Calvinism is just socialism in a nice little tidy theological box, and I couldn't have it anymore. So I walked away.

That actually makes perfect sense. And it's scary to think how many people haven't realized that Calvinism is Bernie Sanders socialism. That is going to help, I think, a lot of people. Now, for a while—.

I've never seen him and John Piper, and I've never seen them in the same room together. So I'm just saying, I think there's something about that.

They probably are the same exact person. So you used to call your theology traditionalism, and you have since changed that to provisionism. Can you explain to us why you now call it provisionism?

Yeah, our followers were having trouble spelling traditional, so we went with something we thought would be easier.

That makes sense. That makes sense. So you sort of gave them a bit of provision so that they could spell it. That makes sense for me. That's right. Now, Dr. Flowers, you're known for having some incredibly strong opinions on various things.

And so I'm going to ask you, just real quick, shoot through these things. I'm going to ask you quick questions, and you can just respond. First of all, would you rather fight one James White-sized bee or 100 bee-sized James Whites?

Take your time.

Take your time. You know what? You know what? I've seen 100 bee-sized James Whites before in my dreams. Because even though I don't talk about eschatology a lot, I have a lot of dreams about the book of Revelation.

And it is truly in my mind that when the locusts come, the locust revelation, that every one of them is going to look just like James White in a bow tie. So I'm fairly convinced that that's the one I would be more afraid of.

Again, I mean, the wisdom that you're spouting right now is some of the most incredible. I always picture James White as flying the Apache helicopter, shooting things down. Do you think that's accurate at all?

Well, you know, I'm not a dispensationalist. A lot of people have asked me, are you a dispensationalist? I tell people this. I take the traditional view that Southern Baptists have always held, at least for the last 100 years.

Because that's what I think is really the high point of all theology, is what Southern Baptists have believed since about 1920 to about right now. That's the perfect theology, and it can't be improved upon.

So that makes sense. So wherever they're at, that's where I'm at.

Again, that is incredible. And of course, I know you use the word traditional there, but of course we're now calling it provisionist. So what the Southern Baptists have provisionally believed for the past 100 years absolutely cannot be improved upon.

Now, I know that you recently came out with a new book called Jesus's Drawing of Sinners or something like that. I don't know because I can't read.

It's called Drawn by Jesus, and really what it is is a picture book. Every page is a picture that I believe Jesus drew of me. So that's what it is.

You know what? I was worried because I can't read well, and so I love picture books. That's going to be incredibly helpful for a Calvinist to have a picture book from Dr. Flowers. Now, Dr. Flowers, again, strong opinions, but I've never heard you, in all of the hours that I've listened to of you speaking, I have never heard you share before what your favorite flower actually is.

So can you tell us what is your favorite flower and why is it the tulip? Yeah, you almost got me.

You almost got me. I have a favorite flower. It's the one that my kids used to use. They would put it underneath their chin to see if they like butter. I don't remember what it's called, but that little one, that always really made me feel good.

It disintegrates very easy, just like a lot of my arguments, but it's really, really helpful to just hold that under your chin and see if you like butter. I don't know if you know the one I'm talking about, but that's my favorite flower.

No, I think everybody's going to know exactly what you're talking about. Have you ever pulled flowers apart and asked yourself whether or not God loved you?

I know God loves me. He loves all of us. He loves everyone indiscriminately and without any question. So that one, I don't even have to pull. Does he love me? Does he not? I will say this, though, on that flower question, if you were to ask me again, I would probably say all purpose.

That would be my favorite. You know what?

Yes, that's perfect. That makes entirely too much sense for this interview. Now, as we think about these things, John 3, 16, obviously a favorite verse where it tells us that God so loved the world, but he gave his only

I was going to ask you to quote it because I don't think I remember it. I was going to ask you to quote it. I don't think I've heard it.

Oh, okay. God so loved the world that he gave his only begotten son that whosoever believes in him shall not perish. Now, who's the whosoever referring to? Everybody. Everybody. Everybody. Now, with that in mind, I would like you to respond to another quote that I have here, if that's okay, Dr. Flowers.

So here's the quote. Are you ready? When the Gentiles heard this, they began rejoicing and glorifying the word of the Lord, and as many as were appointed to eternal life believed.

What do you make of that? I think that's a quote from James White's book. That's what it sounds like to me.

That's actually Acts 13, 48. That's in the Bible.