Proverbs 3 Wisdom for Life: Who is Your Neighbor?

All right, we're continuing our study in the book of Proverbs, and we're just working our way systematically through it, and just so that you understand, trying to work verse by verse through Proverbs does not work.

It's almost impossible to do that because it's not in an outline form because of the type of literature.

We know it's wisdom literature. That's not the way the book is put together. So what we're doing is we're going through systematically and coming upon topics, and then whatever topic that we study, like today we're looking at the idea of what does it mean to be a good neighbor.

We will go through the rest of the book of Proverbs and bring in those verses that apply to it, and it's that way we can make some sense out of it.

All right, so we're just going to review a little bit. Remember, Proverbs is wisdom literature.

We talked a little bit about that, which means that it's written down in a different concept, and you have to keep that in mind or you're not going to really understand what the book of Proverbs is all about.

For example, Proverbs sometimes just tells you the way things are. It's not even just telling you what to do about it, but just giving you wisdom, like this is the way life works, okay?

And so the purpose of the book is to make one wise, and we've already looked at kind of a working definition that wisdom is the ability to handle life with skill.

Proverbs addresses all areas of life, but in a very practical manner. In other words, Proverbs doesn't just tell you that this is right and this is wrong, but how do you remedy that, okay?

And so this morning, we're going to examine our relationship to our neighbors. And so the beginning text that we're going to be looking at is

Proverbs 3, verses 27 to 30. Do not withhold good from those to whom it is due when it is in your power to do it.

Do not say to your neighbor, go and come back, and tomorrow I will give it when you have it with you.

Do not devise harm against your neighbor while he lives in security beside you.

Do not contend with a man without cause if he has done you no harm. Now that's the beginning text.

We're going to look not only at these verses, but at some of the other verses in Proverbs and the rest of Scripture.

Now there's an important preliminary question when we deal with the concept of how to become a good neighbor, and that is who is your neighbor?

Well, we don't have to wonder too much because Jesus answers that question for us.

In Luke 10, verses 29 to 37, which we all know as the parable of the good

Samaritan. Luke 10. This is the beginning.

Remember, this follows the idea of what must the rich man come to, what must

I do to inherit eternal life? And Jesus says, what does the law say? And the rich young man answered it correctly, you know, love the

Lord your God with all your heart, soul, mind, and strength. Love your neighbor as yourself. And then

Jesus tells him, well, go and do that. And then wishing to justify himself, he said to Jesus, and who is my neighbor?

Jesus replied, and we go through this parable. A certain man was going down from Jerusalem to Jericho, fell among robbers.

They stripped him and beat him and went off, leaving him half dead. And by chance, a certain priest was going on that road, and when he saw him, he passed by on the other side.

And likewise, a Levite also came to the place, saw him, passed by on the other side. But a certain

Samaritan who was on a journey came upon him. When he saw him, he felt compassion.

And he came to him and bandaged up his wounds, pouring oil and wine on them, and he put them on his own beast and brought him to an inn, took care of him.

Next day he took out two denarii, gave them to the innkeeper and said, take care of him, and whatever more you spend when

I return, I will repay you. Which of these three do you think proved to be a neighbor to the man who fell into the robber's hands?

And he said, the one who showed mercy toward him. And Jesus said, go and do the same.

Now obviously, there's a lot of lessons in that parable, but that's not what we're looking at. We talk about this parable, we bring it up basically to answer the question, who is my neighbor?

And so your neighbor is not limited to those who just live near you. It's not just those who live on either side and across the street.

Based on the words of Jesus, your neighbor is anyone you come in contact with or interact with. The Samaritan didn't know the injured man, but he was the one who stopped and helped him anyway.

When you see someone in need, there is an obligation to help them. That's one of the conclusions of the parable of the

Good Samaritan. Now there's a lot of other good stuff in that parable, but for our purposes, this is the one we're looking at.

So now why is this true? Why is it true that when you see someone in need, you have an obligation to help them?

And this is where we have to go back and remember what prompted the parable. The lawyer asked, what must he do?

He accurately recites the two great commandments, love the Lord your God, love your neighbor. So what's the conclusion of that?

You owe your neighbor the debt of love. That's the overriding principle in the parable of the

Good Samaritan. Now again, there's a lot of other great learning stuff, but that's the one that we want to look at. You owe your neighbor the debt of love.

Verse 27 of Proverbs 3, this is our opening text. Do not withhold good, oh, getting back.

First point we want to do, how do you be a good neighbor then? Is meet your obligations. We're going to look at several different ways to be a good neighbor.

Do not withhold good from those to whom it is due, when it is in your power to do it. And do not say to your neighbor, go and come back and tomorrow

I will give it to you when you have it with you. Now the main principle of those two verses is this, if you owe your neighbor anything and you can pay the debt, pay it when it's due.

How does that apply to the parable of the Good Samaritan? The Samaritan could have said, you know, I'm in a hurry,

I have a meeting starting in 15 minutes, I'll come back. No, he was in need right at that moment and the

Samaritan actually, because of who we are as the image bearers of God, owed that man the help that he could give to him.

What was more important than seeing a man who was half dead? And the scripture says he was half dead, in other words, left alone, that man was going to die.

So applications, first and foremost, of course, is pay your bills on time. If you have the money, now obviously if you don't have the money you can't pay it, but that's for another sermon, why you have bills you can't pay.

But the point is, if you owe something, pay it when you owe it.

If you have given your word to do something at a particular time, live up to your obligation. This is one of my biggest pet peeves.

It's, you have no idea, it tests my sanctification every time somebody does this.

I will be there, pastor, and then the day comes and they don't show up. It's not right, because every time we open our mouths and say yes or no, we're swearing an oath.

That's the teaching of the Sermon on the Mount. So if you say, oh, by the way, I'll be there

Saturday morning at 9 o 'clock, where should you be? Wherever you said you're going to be at 9 o 'clock.

And in our society today, it's just become popular, yeah, I'll be there, and I don't feel like it when

I get, you know, I'm tired this morning, I worked late last night, I'm not going to be there. I've taken this so far that when somebody has an appointment with me, if something comes up, even if it's an emergency,

I call that person and I ask permission to cancel and to reschedule the meeting.

All right, and some of you may have already heard me say something like that. Listen, something came up I know we're supposed to meet.

Can we put this meeting off? Because I have promised that person.

When I say, if you ask me if we can meet, let's say, you know, Thursday afternoon at 2 o 'clock, and I say yes,

I've just given you my word that I'll be there. And if something happens, I need your permission to reschedule it.

Otherwise, I got to be there. Make sense? Deuteronomy 24, verses 14 and 15, you shall not oppress a hired servant who is poor and needy, whether he is one of your countrymen or one of your aliens who is in your land in your towns.

You shall give him his wages on his day before the sun sets. That's the way to have the contracts back in those days.

I mean, now if we want to put that off and get paid every two weeks or whatever, whatever the obligation is, for he is poor and sets his heart on it so that he may not cry against you to the

Lord. And it becomes sin in you. Notice the

Old Testament says it's a sin if you're withholding something that is due somebody else legally do them.

It is sin. And you, Leviticus 19, verse 13, you shall not oppress your neighbor nor rob him.

The wages of a hired man are not to remain with you all night until morning.

OK. And again, that was the culture of the day. But whatever it turns out to be, however, when you owe whatever payday is, you have to pay that.

All right. And of course, it's the principle goes beyond an employer and employee.

If you owe anything, regardless of who it is. By the way, let me just point out, I might say this later, but I'll point it out here anyway.

Leviticus 19. All right. Anybody know what's special about Leviticus 19?

It's often called the love chapter of the old covenant law. Because Leviticus 19 is full of statements just like this, talking how to treat your neighbor.

How do you it's a very practical way of I'm supposed to love my neighbor. How do I love my neighbor?

Well, go to Leviticus 19. You'd think I'd say go to someplace in the New Testament, wouldn't you?

Well, of course you can do that, too. But it's in the old covenant law. All right.

Those who the theologies today that tell you that the old law is abrogated are so wrong on so many levels because they're abrogating this type of behavior, which is mandated by law.

Now, notice. You'll notice as we go through, not only is it mandated, this is law now.

OK. We find it in the wisdom literature, the same thing, the same principles we're finding in Proverbs.

If you want to be wise, obey the law. OK. And where else do we find it?

In the new covenant restated a little bit differently, but it's restated.

So we find it in every aspect of Scripture. Here's James 5, 4.

Behold, the pay of the pay of the labors who mowed your fields and which has been withheld by you cries out against you.

And the outcry of those who did the harvesting has reached the ears of the Lord of Sabaoth. Notice the principle, the same principle,

Old Testament law, wisdom, literature, New Testament. God doesn't talk out of both sides of his mouth and he is unchanging.

Romans 13. This is in the section where we where Paul is talking about our obligation to the governments.

OK. And talking about that, he says, oh, nothing to anyone except to love one another. There's that debt of love.

What do you what should you owe to somebody else? Not money. Should owe love.

For he who loves his neighbor has fulfilled the law. Funny, isn't it?

Paul obviously didn't think that the law was abrogated, did he? He says, because if you love your neighbor, you're fulfilling the law.

James 4, 17. Therefore, to one who knows the right thing to do and does not do it to him, it is sin.

If that Samaritan had looked at the fellow and did what the Levite and the priest did and walked on the other side, what is it?

It's sin. I said it.

Yeah, I stuttered. Micah 6, 8.

He's starting already. Actually, never mind. Micah 6, 8.

He has told you, old man, what is good. And what does the Lord require of you? But to do justice, to love kindness and to walk humbly with your

God. Second point from these verses in Proverbs.

First one is meet your obligations. Second one is don't stir up trouble. Proverbs 3.

This is the verses we looked at our opening. Do not devise harm against your neighbor while he lives in security beside you.

Do not contend with a man without cause if he has done you no harm. In other words, your neighbor should be able to trust you.

It would be a shame to have a Christian living in a neighborhood and have the people around him and the people that you come in contact with not trust you.

The scripture condemns in the strongest language those who devise evil against their neighbor.

Proverbs 6, verses 12 to 14. A worthless person, a wicked man, is the one who walks with a perverse mouth.

And perverse mouth doesn't just mean cursing or saying unsavory things.

A perverse mouth, yeah, anything that should not be coming out of your mouth, whether it be a lie, whether it be deception.

He who winks with his eye, who signals with his feet, who points with his fingers. You got to love

Proverbs. And look at what is that describing? The con man.

And a con man is not just a professional scammer or grifter. I have a confession to make.

I love movies about scammers. One of my favorite movies is The Sting. All right.

But for entertainment value, not for truth value of it. There was a

TV show on. It was actually produced by the BBC. It was called Hustle. And it was, again, very similar to this thing.

It was a story about these con men. All right. Now, of course, they glorified them. They would never.

Their motto was you can't scam an honest man. So they had their own code and stuff.

But I like it because of the workings to get their con to work.

I'll repent. I'll repent. But that's who that's describing. Who with perversity in his heart continually devises evil, who spreads strife.

Notice, continually devises evil, who spreads strife.

Don't stir up trouble. Deuteronomy 27, 24.

Cursed is he who strikes his neighbor in secret. James 3, 14 or 15.

But if you have bitter jealousy and selfish ambition in your heart, do not be arrogant and so lie against the truth.

This wisdom is not that which comes down from above, but is earthly, natural, demonic.

Notice, cursed is he who strikes his neighbor in secret. Don't stir up trouble. Cursed is he who...

I repeat it. Boy, I guess I must have been tired when I did this. That's twice now.

We have been looking at the negative side, what not to do. Cursed is he who strikes his neighbor in secret. But the scripture also gives the positive side.

It doesn't just tell you don't do this. It tells you what to do. Matthew 7, 12.

Therefore, however you want people to treat you, so treat them. For this is the law and the prophets.

And now we've seen Leviticus 19. It's coming right from the law. We see it in the prophets.

We see it in the whole old covenant. Look again at verse 30.

Do not contend with a man without cause. If he has done you no harm.

Let me sum this up very simply. Don't be a troublemaker. That's basically what

Proverbs is saying. We are not called to make trouble, but to be peacemakers.

Which is our third point from these texts. Live in peace.

Live in peace. Proverbs 14, 21. He who despises his neighbor's sins, but happy is he who is gracious to the poor.

How do you live in peace? By treating people the way you would have people treat you.

Proverbs 11, 12. He who despises his neighbor lacks sense, but a man of understanding keeps silent.

This is a subtle one. But again, it's another one of my favorites. Sometimes it's better just to keep your mouth shut.

Here's the principle. Just because you can say something, doesn't mean you should. I have people come to me periodically and say,

Pastor, I think you should know. I'm out. Don't go any further. Why should

I know this? Are you going to tell me that somebody's in sin?

Then you have an obligation. Not to tell me, but to go to the person.

And sometimes it's better just if it's not sin, but something that maybe you just don't like.

It's better just to keep your mouth shut. Biblical principle. A man of understanding keeps silent.

Now, the key is to know when to keep silent and when you must open your mouth. Proverbs 17, 28.

Even a fool, when he keeps silent, is considered wise. When he closes his lips, he is counted prudent.

I love that. That's one of my... I actually had my college physics professor.

Brilliant, brilliant physicist. He was a Jewish fellow. He actually quoted this, but in his own thing.

I never forget in front of the class, he says, Franzi, let me tell you this. Sometimes it's better to keep your mouth shut and appear a fool than to open your mouth and prove it.

But he was... I don't know if he knew he was quoting scripture, but he was. He's quoting

Proverbs 17, 28. Romans 12, 18. If possible, so far as it depends on you, be at peace with all men.

Now notice, so far as it depends on you. In other words,

Paul understood that there were times that you were not going to live in peace. But if those times come, don't let it be your fault.

You do everything you can reasonably biblically to live in peace, but don't let it be your fault if the peace vanishes.

Proverbs 26, 18 and 19. This, again, another one of my favorite verses. Like a madman who throws firebrands, arrows and death, so is the man who deceives his neighbor and says, was

I not joking? How often do you see this? Somebody will say something that's sharp and barbing, all right, and it hurts.

They realize, oh, I was just kidding. What does

Proverbs say? It says, you're a crazy man. That's what it says.

Like a madman who throws flaming arrows into the middle of a crowd.

That's what you are if you hurt somebody, especially with your tongue. And you know,

I didn't mean that. You know, I was just kidding. You know, I never mean to hurt you. Yeah.

Being a good neighbor means loving your neighbor as yourself. Loving your neighbor is not just a new covenant mandate.

We've seen that. All right. It was built into God's law. Leviticus 19 has been called the love chapter of God's law.

Go home today. Read Leviticus 19 and see what your obligations are under the old covenant law.

It outlines many of the principles we see in the book of Proverbs. So do you want to be wise?

Love your neighbor. Questions. Comments.

Yes, John. We even had it come up when we were looking to buy a church. But the idea of no man anything.

In regards to, you know, a church with a mortgage. Just explain that.

Clarify that. Yeah. Well, again, and this is why it's important to understand what Proverbs is all about.

Proverbs is giving you. It's not laying down law. It's explaining the principles of law.

It's better not to owe. Why? Because the borrower becomes a slave of the lender.

So whatever you do, you should be striving to get out of debt. Look, there are certain things you just, especially in our society, you just have to be in debt for.

But the goal is to be out of debt as to the extent that you can. That's how wisdom literature is applied.

Any other questions? No. Yes. Could you kind of just discuss a little bit the verse that says, so far as it concerns you, be at peace with all men, and just reconcile that with, you know,

Jesus saying, I came out to bring peace with a sword, and how, you know, peace, peace doesn't necessarily mean the absence of conflict, and how, you know, as Christians, I think that we do tend too much in this society today to just consider peace as the absence of conflict, and therefore not, you know, engage the culture with the full gospel.

Yeah. That's an excellent question, and there's really, it's a very simple question to answer. Firstly, the concept of peace is used differently, just like the concept of love is used differently in the

Scripture, and the context is what defines how it should be used. The basic concept of peace, most often used in Scripture, is peace with God, okay, and when

Jesus says, I came not to bring peace, because he's bringing the truth of God, which is always going to be in conflict with the lie of Satan, so there's that cosmic war which will not be won until the end of the age, all right, that's different than us living personally in peace with our neighbor, all right.

If we are living as Christians in our neighborhood, and with the people that we come in contact with, because we know the neighbors have expanded on that, and we are in conflict because of the gospel, so be it, but if it's because you have not lived up to your obligations or you have stirred up trouble, that's what the

Scripture rails against, and that's why

Paul says, so far as it depends upon you, be at peace with all men, so don't let you be the thing.

If it's the gospel, then so be it, okay, does that make sense?

So as we are going about living our lives, don't let you as an individual give an offense by your actions, unless those actions are the preaching of the word, and in fact, let me even say this, sometimes the way the gospel is given is the offense and not the gospel itself, and that's what you have to be careful of.

Jesus, we should really take the example, if you go through the gospels and see how did

Jesus give the gospel, how did he call people to repentance?

To sinners, other than those who were leading other people astray, he was always gracious.

A woman by the well, would you give me a drink? Gets into a discussion and obviously has love for that woman.

Even the rich young ruler, when he left, he felt compassion for him.

Who did he rail against? The Pharisees, the scribes, the hypocrites, those who were in charge of the camp of Israel, who were supposed to be teaching the truth.

Even with Nicodemus, he says, are you a ruler in Israel and you don't know these basic facts about the gospel?

So we have to be careful, even how we present the gospel, that we are not an offense.

If they take offense with the gospel, fine. That's the way the nature of it.

But don't let it be you. In fact, even the Sermon on the

Mount, and this is where, why do we have some people who claim to be Christians, who are pacifists?

Because they misinterpret the Sermon on the Mount. Sermon on the Mount is meant for individual behavior.

Somebody strikes you on the cheek. What does the scripture say? Turn the other cheek.

But why? Why are you turning the other cheek? To give them an opportunity to strike it again?

Yeah, the answer is no, because if you're putting the other cheek, say, yeah, go ahead, hit this one. You're tempting them to sin.

And that's not the message of the scripture. What you're doing, you're saying, you shouldn't have done that.

I'm going to give you a chance, kiss this one. Okay. That's individual behavior.

Is that how nations treat other nations? No. There's a difference between because of covenant responsibility.

It is not the purview of individuals to declare war. We ought to be peacemakers.

It is okay and not only right, but justified for nations to declare war at times.

Yeah. Isn't that, though, doesn't that verse just also teach that we're to suffer any injury that could be born?

Like, it's just a slap on the face. It's not like a fatal or mortal wound to you or your family or something like that.

It's a slap. It's not like you're getting shot at. Yeah. Like if someone's shooting you, you got to continue to stand there and get shot at.

Right. It's just a slap in the face. Yeah, which is a euphemism for all kinds of different things.

But again, it depends on how far you take that, too, because there comes a point.

What if it's a punch on the face and not a slap on the face? You still obligated to any other cheek?

See what I mean? It's Arnold Schwarzenegger.

See, the point is there's wisdom involved, and the idea is in each particular circumstance, how can you represent the gospel and react in a

Christian -like manner? If somebody punches you in the face, all right, the idea is that you should not take your revenge.

Now, obviously, if he's wailing your punches and everything else, of course, you have the right, perfect right to defend yourself, but you also have the right to take him to court.

That's not contrary to the gospel, and that's what some of the pacifists do. They say, oh, no, no, we would never do that, and that's why they won't go fight for the nation and all kinds of other things.

There's a difference, and that's why one of the things you'll hear in this church from anybody that's in the pulpit or you're teaching

Sunday school is that there is context.

The context of the teaching is important, all right, because it's not always clear black and white, and otherwise, you wouldn't need the book of Proverbs, and you wouldn't need the book of James because those two books are particularly wisdom literature, and the wisdom is to tell you how.

In fact, that's why we have the book of Leviticus. We have ten commandments, and what do we say?

Those laws are enough, right? We don't need any more laws, but then God went on and gave us a whole bunch of other laws.

Why? To explain how do you apply those ten commandments to the culture, and so we need those other laws, the ones from Leviticus and all.

Otherwise, how do we know? Thou shalt not commit murder. What's murder?

Is every taking of life murder? No. The Bible teaches that it's not.

Not every taking of life is worthy of the death penalty, right?

You need the other books. That's why I like what Gary North refers to these other laws as.

He calls them the case laws, the case laws of Israel, and that's where God explains how to apply the ten commandments to the society, and there's a difference between how a nation applies them and how an individual applies them because of the different covenant responsibilities.

Does that answer your question? Okay. Oh, yeah.

I mean, look, it's a very complex subject. I mean, that's why, you know, just look at all the books.

Gary North has written a volume this big on, I think it was Deuteronomy or Leviticus, one of the others.

It's that thick, just trying to, you know, commentary on it. So, yeah, it's very complex. But the basic facts, how do you be a good neighbor?

It's not complex. It's pretty simple. Treat your neighbor as you would like to be treated.