Proverbs 3:1-6 (The Father's Wisdom)

The Shepherd's Church

Subscribe

Download

Share

00

00:09

Thank you for subscribing to the Shepherds Church podcast. This is our Lord's Day sermon. We pray that as we declare the word of God, that you would be encouraged, strengthened in your faith, and that you would catch a greater vision of who

00:22

Christ is. May you be blessed in the hearing of God's word, and may the Lord be with you.

00:33

Thank you for everyone who prayed for my voice. It's about 80 % there. So, if I have to stop for a cough here and there, you'll show me grace.

00:42

80 % there is good, though. Now, I'm not telling you anything you don't know when

00:51

I say that we live in a world that has been emasculated, where masculinity has been viciously attacked, where being a man is now viewed as a kind of disease or a mental illness to be treated, medicated, or cured.

01:10

Men are shamed for their masculine character, like courage, risk -taking, hard work, chivalry, entrepreneurship, and ambition, and even righteous applications of things like anger and aggression.

01:27

These are God -given qualities that men have been taught to feel like pariahs whenever they exemplify them, and these are the very character traits that God himself has given to men to bring glory to God.

01:43

And in their absence, society has absolutely crumbled. Instead of society becoming stronger and healthier because of effeminacy, it has actually crumbled before our very eyes.

01:57

Instead of homes being happy and holier with weak men, they have become devastated. Marriages have become disintegrated because weak men become cowards and cowards become immoral and the immoral become utterly selfish.

02:14

Selfish men are infants in their maturity, incapable of leading, incapable of fighting, incapable of preserving, and incapable of keeping anything that God has given us to steward.

02:28

This has result in the abandonment of children, rampant divorce, the proliferation of pornography, communities that have fallen apart, and a nation that has slid into utter ruin.

02:40

And the cure for the world is not more men in dresses. The cure for the world is not more roid -raging boys who never grow up.

02:51

The cure is a revival of biblical masculinity, and even under that, a cure is the gospel.

02:59

The gospel will ensure a revival of masculinity where we will look to the perfect man,

03:05

Jesus Christ, and we will see how he thinks, how he walks, how he talks, how he acts, and we will act like him.

03:14

The revival of the gospel will empower a redemption in masculinity by the power of the

03:19

Holy Spirit so that men now act like men. And this is especially true in fatherhood.

03:30

We need a revival of masculinity because we need to see young men marry well again, young men raise families, young men work so that their wives can stay home with their precious little ones, and men who will push back the enemy with the gospel of Christ because it is not the gospel that has failed, it is our men who have failed in this weak world.

03:56

The gates of hell will not stand against the advancement of the gospel. The only time the gates of hell keep standing is when the church stops advancing.

04:07

We need men who are not just men, and what I mean by that is men who are just present, men who just get a paycheck, men who just go downstairs when there's a bump in the night to check to make sure that there's not a robber who broke in, we don't need men who are just that.

04:24

Those are good things. I am the designated checker in my house to the glory of God.

04:29

I see you there, brother. But we need men to take up the mantle of godly leadership.

04:38

It's not enough to just be male. It's not enough to just get a paycheck. We need men who will step into leadership, headship, biblical leadership, where men are now leading their families and teaching their families who

04:52

Christ is. We need men who will not only talk about God on Sunday morning, but who will bring up God in the morning and in the evening of every day of the week.

05:02

We need men who will pray with their children, men who will sing with their children, and men who will lead their family in family worship, men who will work tirelessly to impart wisdom, as Solomon points out in our passage today.

05:19

Now, how do men impart wisdom? Well, in this passage, we're gonna learn that wisdom is imparted through discipline, spiritual discipline, and it is the man's job to bring spiritual discipline to his home.

05:37

A man who abdicates that responsibility is a man who needs to repent. A man must, according to Solomon, bring that kind of discipline into his own life.

05:50

He must first apply it to himself before he can lead anyone else. Kind of discipline that's not rooted in frustration, anxiety, annoyance, or punishment, but a kind of discipline that enriches the life of his family and points them to the only

06:07

Savior, Jesus Christ. A kind of discipline that brings life to his wife, that brings health to his children, that brings gospel vitality to his home so that his children grow up as believers to now be the next generation who will go and make disciples, who make disciples, who bring the world to Christ.

06:33

A wise father disciplines wisely. He doesn't discipline as a hammer to break his children's will.

06:40

He disciplines as a chisel to carve out godliness in his children.

06:47

Discipline is a means of grace. We don't like discipline. When I was in the army, I didn't like waking up and doing hundreds of pushups.

06:55

I didn't like marching in formation. I didn't like all of the tediousness of discipline, and yet, discipline is for our good.

07:04

It brings blessings to us and to our home, and it mirrors the way that our Father disciplines us, our

07:11

Heavenly Father. So today, I want us to look at three examples of spiritual disciplines, and I want us to look at them through two lenses.

07:18

Primarily, I want us to look at them through the lens of God is our Heavenly Father who gives us these disciplines for all of us.

07:26

Secondarily, though, brothers, I want you to look at it as men. Your responsibility doesn't end unto yourself.

07:35

For everyone else in the room, discipline is for you. For you men, discipline is for you and your family.

07:41

So I want you to hear it in that way. We're gonna talk about three things. We're gonna talk about the discipline of loving the

07:47

Word, the discipline of loving our neighbor, and the discipline of trusting God. So with that, will you turn with me to Proverbs 3, chapter three, verses one through six.

08:01

We were gonna do 12 verses today, and we're only gonna do six. If you're new to Shepherd's Church, this is not surprising.

08:10

Let us read, starting in verse one of chapter three. My son, do not forget my teaching, but let your heart keep my commandments.

08:22

For length of days and years of life and peace they will add to you. Do not let kindness and truth leave you.

08:31

Bind them around your neck. Write them on the tablet of your heart so that you won't find favor and good repute in the sight of God and man.

08:42

Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your path straight.

08:53

Let us pray. Lord, thank you for this passage.

09:02

Thank you for what it means to us as your people, what it means to us as women, what it means to us as men, what it means to us as a church, and what implications it will have for the world.

09:16

Lord, help us today to see the goodness and the glory and the truth of your

09:22

Word. Let us rejoice and be glad in these things, and let us trust you in all things so that our paths will be made straight.

09:33

It's in Jesus' name we pray, amen. Solomon begins this passage as a father.

09:45

At the start of the passage it is Solomon himself who is in view speaking to his son. Now I love this because he said, do not forget my teaching.

09:54

This is him talking to his son. My son, do not forget my teaching. This is a dad talking to his boy.

10:01

And what I love about this is you think about how busy Solomon actually was, you know, running the empire, doing foreign policy, overseeing building projects, meeting with foreign dignitaries, making sure that this and that and this and that were good to go in the kingdom, and yet he still prioritized discipline for his children.

10:22

He didn't let the busyness of life take him away from the most primary responsibility that he had as a father, which is to bring discipline to his son.

10:31

And how many of us, myself included, need to be reminded that our busyness is not an excuse for lethargy in this area.

10:42

We are not as busy as Solomon at the height of Israel's empire.

10:49

So we are not too busy to bring discipline to our children. When Solomon says, my son, do not forget my teaching, we see that Solomon is indicating that this is not something that he did sparsely, but it's something that he did regularly.

11:05

Solomon was the kind of man who brought lessons to his children, who pulled them aside to teach them morality, who talked to them about the truth at the dinner table, who imparted wisdom to them at their bedside.

11:19

He was a father who had a life and a body of teaching that he could point to.

11:27

Now in that sense, brothers, do you have a body of teaching?

11:33

Do you have a corpus? Do you have, if you were to add up the conversations that you've had teaching your children about God, enough to call it my teaching?

11:46

Solomon calls his instruction to his children my teaching because he's pointing to a body of work.

11:51

Do you have a body of work that you can point to, that you could point your children to and say, remember my teaching?

12:03

You see, the saddest thing I think, and this is what the enemy has done in our society.

12:10

The enemy has attacked masculinity so hard and made men so discouraged.

12:16

And listen, I'm not pummeling you right now and I'm not shaming you right now, but I am saying that you've been hit hard for decades and you're discouraged.

12:28

But do not in your discouragement remain silent at your table. Do not in your discouragement allow yourself to be passive in your leadership.

12:40

There are far too many children who grew up with a father who was there in body but he did not have a body of teaching to equip his children in the things of God.

12:54

And unfortunately, it happens far too often even among pastors and elders and deacons.

13:04

Brothers and sisters, we have to have a body of work that we can point to that we have had these conversations with our children, teachings, times, moments, conversations the question is, do we have a rhythm of that?

13:21

Because if we don't teach our children who will, we know who will. Disney is spending hundreds of billions of dollars to teach your children their values.

13:35

Our government has spent decades sexualizing our children covertly, do research on men like Alfred Kinsey, do research on women like Margaret Sanger, do research on these things and you will see that they have a plan to disciple your children.

13:56

Do you have a plan to disciple your children? This passage begins with the fatherhood of Solomon and brothers, it begins in your home with you.

14:08

If you're not a father, prepare well for fatherhood. If you're not married yet, prepare well for marriage.

14:13

And what I mean by that is learn to lead yourself so that when God should trust you with a precious diadem and a wife that you will be ready to lead.

14:27

And when he should trust you with little ones that you would be ready to teach. But do not forget this most precious discipline, we have lost too many children to Satan so far.

14:39

Enough is enough. Now this passage begins with the fatherhood of Solomon but it doesn't end that way.

14:45

Solomon actually in verse 11, which we were going to cover today but we're not. He switches from my son, my teaching to discipline of the

14:56

Lord. So he switches it. He says that yes, it's important for me to teach my children but underneath it, there's something even more important than my teaching, it is the fatherhood of God.

15:10

Because if we don't have the fatherhood of God, we can teach our children, pagans can teach their children, atheists can teach their children.

15:19

They can have the same mealtime rituals as us except devoted to a pagan

15:25

God. It's not enough for me to just say that we must teach, we must be grounded in and rooted in the fatherhood of Almighty God.

15:33

Because his fatherhood informs our fatherhood. His discipline informs our discipline.

15:40

And Solomon again, not downplaying our role as men, he's saying even more that you must be rooted in the fatherhood of God.

15:50

If that is not your foundation, you are going to fail because you are replicating you and you will make twice the son of hell as you are.

16:01

Instead of giving our children us, we are called to give them him.

16:08

We are called to share with them him. We are called to share not our opinions, not our anecdotes, those are fun, those are okay, but that must not be it.

16:20

We are called to share with them him. And that is the point of this passage that we would be grounded, all of us, in the fatherhood of God and men especially that you would allow the fatherhood of God to inform your fathering.

16:37

So that as we learn to master these disciplines that the

16:43

Lord is giving us personally, that we would then learn how to share them with others.

16:51

The first discipline that comes up in this passage is to love the word. This is the first command in this passage and it says, do not forget my teaching, but let your heart keep my commandments.

17:02

Because we know that this passage is from Solomon to his son, but even more specifically, it is from the

17:08

Holy Spirit of God to us because God left it in the Bible for us. We know that this is actually pointing to, beyond Solomon, to the commands of God.

17:21

Do not forget God's teaching and do not forget his commands because they are life for the people of God.

17:28

This mirrors and echoes what Deuteronomy 6, five through six says, you shall love the Lord your God with all of your heart and with all of your soul and with all of your might and these words shall be on your heart.

17:40

Loving God begins with loving his word. And loving his word, it's a very simple formula in this text.

17:49

If you want to love God, love his word. If you want to love his word, your heart and your mind must be engaged.

17:56

It cannot be one, it must be both. In order to love God's word, we cannot forget his teaching, but we also must keep our hearts on his commandments.

18:09

It's both head and heart. If it's not both, then you're going to fall short. If it's just the head, then you can be a fantastic man of knowledge or woman of knowledge.

18:20

You can be a professor of the highest order and have nothing to show for it at the end of your life because all it was was here.

18:28

And if it just is bouncing around in your heart, then sure, you can be like a bleeding heart liberal or a hippie but not a true

18:36

Christian because it's not rooted to anything of substance. It must be that our doctrine is based on the word of God and our reception of the word of God hits both our head and our heart in order for it to be

18:51

Christian. Christians are not empty -headed emotionalists and Christians are not dead orthodox professors.

19:02

We approach the word of God with both a rational mind and a tender heart. We are not to forget the teaching, that's cognition, but we're also not to let our hearts be far from his commands, that's emotional.

19:17

So that the lover of the word is one who loves it with their head and their heart, which is why

19:23

Jesus says, love the Lord your God with all of your heart, with all of your soul, with all of your mind.

19:33

It's an integrated kind of love. It's a love where every bit of us is working together for an end.

19:39

It is the kind of person who reads the word, who ruminates over the word, and who rejoices in the word.

19:46

Now listen, I have woken up early, got my cup of coffee, and had the best of intentions, and a few brain cells touched each other, and that was it.

20:02

This is not what this is talking about, where a small spark happens and then you're basically a zombie again.

20:10

This is the kind of reading that produces cherishing. This is the kind of reading that produces clinging.

20:17

This is what caused Peter to say, where can we go, Lord? You have the words of life.

20:24

Hell for Peter would be away from God's words. Is that our hell?

20:34

This kind of reading produces a hungering and a thirsting after the word of God. This kind of reading is what

20:39

David said that made him stay up at night and pants, like a deer, pants for the water. This kind of reading is not vanity.

20:46

It's not treating the Bible like it's a dusty relic or it's a part of our morning checklist. This is storing the word of God in our heart, loving it, and treasuring the word of God.

20:57

Here's an example. If you try to bend steel, you're not gonna do very well.

21:05

Try to bend it over your thigh, you're gonna hurt yourself. You're probably gonna pop a blood vessel in your head and then you're gonna have to go to the doctor, and when you're better, we will laugh, all in good fun.

21:18

But if you put steel into the fire and you let it sit in the fire until the fire gets into it, then you can bend the steel.

21:28

The same is true for us. We are unbendable, we are unmoldable, we are rigid, and we are unmoving until you put us in the word of God and you let the word of God sit in us and work its way into us like fire works its way into the steel, and then as you softened in the

21:49

Holy Spirit, the spirit of God bends you according to the master's purpose. He shapes you according to the way that you were designed to be.

21:59

It is as we sit in the word that the word gets into us, that the spirit of God crafts us into the master's purposes.

22:09

So for us today, read the word. Read the word and don't just read it.

22:17

Read in such a way that your head and your heart are captivated. Read in such a way to where you grab it and you scream and someone has to come in the other room and they're like, what's going on?

22:26

Look at what I found in the word. Don't be embarrassed, it's okay.

22:34

Show your children your excitement for the word. Let them see you read it.

22:39

Let them see you enjoy it. Let them see you be excited about it. Let them see you memorizing it.

22:46

Solomon says, bind them around your neck and write them on the tablet of your heart. Brothers and sisters, we have to get off our tablets and get actually in the word so that it will be right on the tablet of our heart.

22:58

We need to get off of the things that distract us from him and get into the things that will actually shape us.

23:08

This happens to my memorization. I had an old pastor once tell me, does the Holy Spirit bring to memory a verse that you've never read?

23:17

And I was like, well, I can't say that he can't because that would be to deny his divinity, but I can't say that he does because that would be to deny the ordinary means of grace that is in the word.

23:35

So because of that, the word that you put into your heart is the ammunition that you have given the

23:42

Holy Spirit of God to sanctify you. How much ammunition do you have?

23:49

How many bullets are in there? Because I'll tell you, it has not failed.

23:55

It's happened so many times. I will memorize a verse that has to do with this topic or that topic, and the very next week, something will happen in my life.

24:05

Life will punch me, and that'll be the verse that the Holy Spirit draws up to my memory and causes me to weep or causes me to rejoice or causes me to praise.

24:17

What have you put in that the Holy Spirit will draw from? Memorization is so important.

24:24

Pick a verse and start there. Maybe it's Jesus wept. It's a little easier to memorize.

24:32

It's just two words. You'd be surprised, though, if that's the only verse you knew how the

24:38

Holy Spirit would bring that verse alive. You think it's simple. It has depth in it. Start with a passage, and then pick another passage, and then pick another passage.

24:48

Make it fun. Do it in your home. Pick a topic. I am prone to melancholy, which is an old -timey word for depression.

24:57

Pick a verse, like cast your anxieties upon him because he cares for you, and then when the anxiety hits you, say it over and over and over again.

25:05

It's a ministry to yourself. It's like lip balm in the middle of a desert.

25:10

It's like a canteen when there is no water. Put the word into you, brothers and sisters.

25:17

Meditate on it. Meditation's different than memorization. Memorization is when you know it.

25:22

Meditation is when you ruminate on it and dwell on it and think about it. If whatever you're struggling with, if it's anger, if it's frustration, if it's bitterness, if it's jealousy, whatever it is, pick a verse for that day.

25:36

Set an alarm on your phone. Redeem Apple and Samsung. And then four times a day, five times a day, six times a day, whatever it is, when the alarm goes off, the

25:50

Lord is my shepherd, I shall not want. He maketh me to lie down in green pastures. He restores my soul. And then do it again.

25:57

The next time the alarm goes off, ruminate on the word because you are cultivating not just your head, you are cultivating your heart.

26:05

You want both to come into alignment. Discuss these verses with your family.

26:10

Put them on your walls. There's biblical precedent for that. Deuteronomy 6 says, put them on your doorpost. So we have done that here.

26:19

Do it in your home. Have a family verse that as soon as you enter into the living room, that's the verse that you see.

26:26

And praise the Lord, we live in a time period where now verses look beautiful. They've decorated them quite nicely.

26:34

So they match your decor is what I'm saying. Hobby lobby for the win.

26:40

But again, more than anything, live the word. Because it's not just your head and your heart, but it also needs to come out of your fingertips.

26:52

This is why James 1 .22 says, but prove yourself to be doers of the word and not merely hearers of the word.

26:59

James even says that the veracity of our faith will be demonstrated by what we do with the word and not just what we think and feel about the word.

27:11

And Solomon even says that when we get to this, we're head, heart and hands are connected to the word of God, where we're loving

27:17

God through his word, that there's blessings that are to be had in that. Listen to what he says in verse two, that it will add length of days and years of life and peace.

27:27

He is saying that that not superficial prosperity, like if you do this and you're going to live to be 97, that he's not saying it quite like that.

27:36

He's saying that the quality of your life, the concentration of your life will be such that it is totally different than it ever was before.

27:46

You will have peace. Shalom in Hebrew is the word for peace.

27:53

It doesn't mean the cessation of war. It means the completion of everything that was broken.

28:00

You think about a car engine that doesn't start. It has no peace and it only gains peace when a skilled mechanic comes in and fixes the things that are broken so that it runs like it was supposed to.

28:11

You have a way that you are supposed to run. And when you're running optimally is when you are loving the word, considering the word and doing the word.

28:23

And when that happens, you have peace. That's what God is promising. That's why he says that the fear of the

28:31

Lord in Proverbs 19, 23 leads to life so that no one or so that the one may sleep satisfied untouched by evil.

28:40

What a promise. That's the first spiritual discipline. And again, everyone, it applies to all of us because God our

28:47

Father has given it to us, his children. But for us men, in the same way that your wife when she's pregnant eats for two or three or four, however many are in there.

29:01

When you go to the word, you eat for more than you. When you open it up, you plunder it for more than you.

29:09

You seek and you hunt and you gather for more than you. Yes, you gather for you, but you always gather extra because God has people in your life that he expects that you will share these things with and that they will be blessed by your faithfulness.

29:26

Amen. Second spiritual discipline that we see in this passage is that we are to love our neighbor and loving our neighbor is a combination of two things as well.

29:36

Just like loving the word is a combination of our mind and our heart being fully engaged. Loving our neighbor, according to this passage, is a combination of both kindness and truth.

29:47

Verse three says, do not let kindness and truth leave you. Bind them around your neck.

29:53

Write them on the tablet of your heart. And when you do this, he says that you will have a good reputation among men.

30:01

So this is about how do we love our neighbor with kindness and truth? Now, I'm going to say for a second what kindness isn't, because kindness has gotten a little bit of a bad rap.

30:11

Kindness is not the same as niceness. Evangelicalism today has adopted a 11th commandment that thou shalt always be nice.

30:21

That is not what this means. Niceness runs as deep as the wrinkles on our faces.

30:28

Kindness is sharing the best of you. Kindness is sharing the best of him.

30:37

Do you see the difference? Niceness is sharing your best day, your best personality, your best smile, your best temperament.

30:46

It's sharing you. Kindness is not about you. Kindness is about sharing the best of God.

30:55

Niceness is when you share your best. Kindness is when you share God's best, his love, his care, his patience, and that doesn't always make people happy.

31:07

Therefore, niceness is dependent upon people's experience, but kindness isn't.

31:13

Kindness is not shallow. It is not plastic compliments. You've met that type, right?

31:20

The schmoozer. Oh, I'm so glad. It's not pretentious handshakes.

31:31

It's not any of that nonsense. It's not flattery. It is a sharing of the things of God with people who need the things of God.

31:43

And how would you share the things of God if you don't know the things of God? Kindness and truth is how we love people.

31:52

Think about this, truth. How can you love someone if you don't share the truth with them?

31:57

How can you love someone if you only give them lies? So they both work together. Truth leads you to be truly kind, and kindness leads you to share truth.

32:09

If it's just about niceness and it's about their experience, but if it's about kindness, it's about what God says, and it changes you.

32:19

Because when you know how much you've been cherished by God, it allows you to be able to cherish other people.

32:27

When you know how much you've been loved by God, it allows you to love other people. When you know how faithful he's been to you, you'll know what to say to someone else to tell them that God is faithful.

32:38

When you see his kindness, it actually transforms you to be kind. Niceness is linear.

32:46

It's about me and you. Kindness is triangular. It's about us and God. The Hebrew word for kindness is hesed.

32:58

Our brother who was just here a couple weeks ago, the sermon on Jonah, loving kindness of God endures forever, remember?

33:07

That was the loudest we've ever been in this church when we were yelling the loving kindness endures forever. This is the covenantal love of God, the faithful love of God, the long -suffering love of God.

33:18

This is not the kind of love that God does in order to make us happy.

33:26

This is the kind of love that God gives to make us holy. So brothers and sisters, when we have that kind of kindness, a dedication to share the things of God, with that kind of truth, a dedication to share the truth of God, then we will truly love our neighbor.

33:46

During COVID, this was so interesting to me because the evangelical church forgot what loving neighbor really means.

33:53

We must wear a mask or else we're not loving our neighbor. Remember, that's niceness, that's not kindness.

34:03

Actions that this require, the Bible's replete with good, godly kindnesses.

34:09

For instance, we show hospitality, Hebrews 13, 12. Do not neglect to show hospitality to strangers, for by this some have entertained angels without even knowing it.

34:18

Kindness calls us to provide for each other's needs. First John 3, 17, but if anyone has the world's goods and sees his brother in need and yet closes his heart against him, how does the love of God abide in him?

34:31

That's not niceness, that's kindness. Kindness causes us to speak the truth in love, therefore laying aside falsehoods, speak truth to each of you with his neighbor, for we are members of one another,

34:42

Ephesians 4, 25. Kindness causes us to pray for our brother. Niceness requires that you're in their presence so that they can see how good you are.

34:51

Kindness is something you can do when you're not even with them. First Timothy 2, 1, first of all,

34:58

I urge you that entreaties and prayers, petitions and thanksgiving be made on behalf of all men. It causes us to forgive one another, it causes us to restore one another, it causes us to rebuke one another.

35:10

You won't find a whole lot of rebuking in niceness, but in kindness you will. It causes us to bear with one another's burdens.

35:17

Niceness often doesn't have the time for bearing with someone's burden, because niceness is a quid pro quo exchange that happens quickly.

35:25

Have you ever met the person who wants to be nice to you, but your problems are too big for them and they move on?

35:31

How are you doing today? You won't believe it, this and this, and then you're like, the person who's being nice is like,

35:38

I'm sorry, I asked. I had a moment like this, I felt terrible. I was in seminary,

35:44

I didn't plan on sharing this example, but we'll go with it. There was a sweet little gentleman from Nigeria who was in class with me and we walked outside for a break, and I said the

35:59

American nice thing. I said, hi, how are you? Because he was standing right in front of me. That's what you do.

36:05

And then he started telling me a 20 minute story of financial burdens and things that were happening at home.

36:14

We were late for class, and I am a very like uptight anal student who wants to be on time, front row, you know, taking notes.

36:23

And the whole time I was struggling, and he looked at me and he said, he said, you're not listening to me, are you?

36:31

And I said, I'm so sorry, I'm not. He said, that is something that's been so hard for me but living in America, that you asked me how

36:39

I'm doing and you don't really care. And oh my goodness, it hit me because he was right.

36:45

It was right. I was being nice, but I wasn't being kind. To really truly love our neighbor, we must be both kind and share the truth.

36:57

And there's blessings when we do this. It says in verse four, so that you will find favor and good repute with both

37:05

God and man. Did you know that God is pleased with us when we are kind? Not just nice.

37:14

Kindness is a four inch thick mahogany cabinet. Niceness is

37:19

Ikea veneer. God is pleased with us when we're kind and God is pleased with us when we share truth.

37:28

God is pleased with us husbands when we put the life of our bride before our own.

37:37

God is not pleased when we take on a kind of macho, egotistical leadership that I said it in some

37:44

Neanderthalian way, therefore, that's what it goes. No, Christ gave himself up for his bride.

37:52

Christ died for his bride. Christ lived for his bride. Christ sacrificed for his bride. Brothers, that is our mission, is to be kind to the dear woman that he has given us.

38:06

When wives love their husbands with a kindness. Did you know, this is a very interesting fact.

38:13

In Ephesians chapter five, men are told to love their wives like Christ loves the church.

38:18

Do you know what Greek word is used there? Agape. Men are to sacrifice for their wives.

38:24

Why? Because men are by nature more selfish than women. It's true.

38:31

It's true. We don't think about things in the multivalence, beautiful spaghetti woven together sort of way and we are reminded to sacrifice for those who we're called to love.

38:44

But in Titus two, when it says that wives are supposed to love their husbands, you know what word is used? It's not agape.

38:50

Because women naturally sacrifice for the ones that they love. You could have been the greatest dunderhead that has ever lived, insulted her new dress and said that you don't think it looks pretty.

39:01

You could have done any number of things to hurt her feelings. And guess who is still in the kitchen making lunch for the family?

39:08

She's not happy with you but she's sacrificing for you. Because women do that naturally. The word that Paul uses there for women to love is philandros, which means have a friendly love.

39:23

Have a pleasant love, have a joyful love. Allow your love to make you smile and be joyful kind of love.

39:32

Because women struggle more than we do. They have more thoughts going on in their minds than we do so it causes them to be sometimes worried or sometimes fearful.

39:43

Men, sacrifice for your wife. That's kindness. Ladies, be pleasant to your husband.

39:50

That is kindness. Brothers, sacrifice for your children.

39:56

Brothers and sisters, sacrifice for one another. Be kind to one another. Did you know that the way that we love one another tells the world the veracity and the validity of the gospel?

40:05

It says that they will know you by your love. You may never share the gospel in a way that Peter did where 3 ,000 people come to Christ.

40:18

In truth, you may lose your voice and be unable to speak, but did you know that you can still proclaim the gospel of Jesus Christ by the way that you love one another?

40:30

There's so much healing that has to happen. Denominations, I'm so fixated on this point because I watch in the reformed world, let's just talk about that.

40:39

Reformed Baptist at Presbyterian's throats. Paedo -Communionist at Credo -Communionist throat.

40:48

People who live in Moscow versus people who live in Escondido, like the list goes on and on.

40:53

Why is there so much division when we will be known by our love? And it does say that we will have good repute in the sight of God and man.

41:07

This doesn't mean that you won't be slandered for being kind, but remember that slander's a lie.

41:15

Slander is taking something and lying about it. Satan is the author of slander. So when people tell the truth about you, you will have a good reputation in the sight of men.

41:25

And because God always tells the truth, you will always have a good reputation and favor from God when you do these things.

41:34

We must love his word with both our head and our heart, and we must love our neighbor with both kindness and truth, and that leads us to our final point that we must trust

41:45

God. We are not commanded to worry in fact, 365 times, and I don't believe that that's accidental.

41:55

The Bible says, fear not. One for every day. Can you imagine that God wrote that during a time when the calendar didn't have 365 days for a people who would have 365 days?

42:12

We're not commanded to worry. We're not commanded to cling for control. Trust is the foundational element of what it means to be

42:22

Christian. It is the bedrock of what it means to be a child of God. Excuse me.

42:28

This is one of the most important verses that we're getting ready to read in the entire Bible. We're talking about memorization.

42:34

Put this one to memory. Trust in the Lord with all your heart and do not lean on your own understanding.

42:42

In all your ways, acknowledge him and he will make your path straight.

42:47

The purpose of our life is to trust God in all things, for all things, above all things.

42:56

In a world obsessed with control, we are to trust God. We're not to plan out and strategize and schedule and strain out the smallest detail because God is in control.

43:09

We act like we have control, but we don't. And you don't want control if you really think about it.

43:15

Control is an illusion. Control is an illusion. You can plan out your life and a single phone call will change everything.

43:23

You can plan out everything and a drunk driver can change everything. We don't really have any control.

43:32

It's an illusion. God is the one who holds the stars in place, the planets in motion, and every breath you take.

43:40

Did you know, and I know you know this, but maybe we need to be reminded of this, you don't keep yourself alive while you're sleeping.

43:49

You have contributed not a single brain cell to your continued existence.

43:55

As you're sitting here listening to me today, you are listening by the grace of God. Every breath you take is borrowed from his grace.

44:05

Every heartbeat that you didn't manufacture, that you didn't manipulate, that you didn't say, make sure you're beating, is a beat borrowed from his grace.

44:16

The solution is not to try to exert more control. The solution is to give it up and to say, all

44:23

I have is yours. The purpose of our life is trust. The question is, who will you trust?

44:34

Will you trust in you, in all of your frailty, in all of your inability, or will you trust in God with all your heart and lean not in your understanding, but in all your ways, acknowledge him?

44:53

Will you surrender the very deepest part of you to him, your desires, your fears, your hurts, your ambitions?

45:03

Trust is not comfortable. Trust is painful at times. When God told, when

45:14

God put it on my and my wife's heart to come up here to Massachusetts, we knew that we were going to a school, and that was it.

45:26

We loaded a Penske truck, because it was cheaper than U -Haul, and we drove, and it was hilarious driving through New York in a

45:35

Penske truck with my wife probably behind me wondering if I was gonna die. Like one inch on each side of the road.

45:46

And there were moments where it was really hard. There was a moment where I didn't have a job, like a full -time job, and it was in this weird place where I'm in seminary full -time, and if I work too many hours, then we lose food stamps, so that actually

46:00

I make less money because we don't have as many benefits. It was a very strange place to be. And I can get sort of in my compartment.

46:09

I am very typical as a male. I am in this box until I'm in that box, and the two don't touch.

46:18

I remember Shannon coming to me and saying, we're four months or five months or however many, three, we're three months behind on rent, and the school just sent us a letter saying you can't register for classes.

46:31

That's when it started mattering to me. What, I can't register? I can't register? So I prayed.

46:39

I tried to solve it myself. I didn't lean into the Lord. I leaned into my own understanding. So I said, if I could just take six classes, which is double full -time, if I could pay it down enough to where I could register, and then

46:54

I could take six classes, then we could skirt out of seminary and then pay them after I get a job.

47:02

And I was crushed. I was working to go to school. I had like 15 ,000 pages to read that semester because I was double time.

47:11

I was falling asleep in the library. I was like walking dead.

47:18

And I remember sitting down at my computer and I said to myself, God, I can't do this anymore.

47:25

If I can't graduate, it was like heartbreaking too. I said, if I can't graduate, I won't, but I can't do it anymore.

47:32

So I canceled two of my classes that day, the two that I had assignments due.

47:43

And I said, Lord, I'm gonna trust you.

47:50

Whatever you want. I'll never forget what happened because it was one of the coolest things that happened in my life.

47:57

I got an email about five minutes later. I leaned back in my chair and for the first time, I felt like I didn't have any weight on me anymore.

48:03

You know that moment where you're carrying so much pressure, so much weight. I leaned back and my computer dinged and I had gotten an email.

48:13

And normally I would just be like, no big deal, but for some reason that ding sounded more dingy than others.

48:23

And I read it and it was from my school and they had said for the last 30 days, they had been considering people for a scholarship and that they had decided that they were gonna give it to me,

48:34

I didn't apply for it, I didn't know it existed and it paid for all my bills. I don't say that because I wanna give you a formula that if you do

48:43

X, then Y will happen. I don't say it like that. I just mean that the Lord proved to me that his plans are higher than my plans and his ways are higher than my ways.

48:52

And the thing that I thought I needed to do to manipulate the situation wasn't actually what needed to happen. I just needed to trust.

49:00

Trust is the bedrock of the Christian faith. Without trust, what is there?

49:09

And yet we don't trust perfectly, which is why the gospel is so good. Because look at everything we've talked about today.

49:18

Christ is the only one who trusted God with all of his heart. Christ is the only one who didn't lean into his understanding.

49:24

He's God in the flesh and yet he said, I don't even speak a word unless my father told me to. He's the one who in all his ways acknowledged

49:31

God. He's the one who truly loved the word. He's the one who truly loved his neighbor as himself. And because of that, the only hope that we actually have is trust.

49:41

Trust that he did it, not trust that we did it. Trust that Christ alone is the one who marched up the hill to Calvary and took the punishment that we deserve.

49:55

We began this sermon talking about how we are children of God. And as children, a good father punishes them when they fall short.

50:03

And what we've done deserved punishment infinity. And yet on that cross, the good son was punished for the children of wrath.

50:18

He traded places with us so that we could receive Christ's blessings even though we deserved his cursings.

50:27

So the only thing, brothers and sisters, that matters actually in your life is do you put your faith and your trust in him?

50:37

The defining moment on whether you go to heaven or hell, the difference between one eternity and another is what the direction that you've aimed your trust.

50:48

Because if you put it in you, you are doomed. But if you put it in Jesus Christ, you'll live forever with him.

50:59

And for all of us who have put our faith and trust in him, you will grow to love the word. And you will grow to love your neighbor.

51:07

And men, may you grow in leadership as you take these sweet truths to your family and share them with them as well.

51:14

Let us pray. Lord, help us as your people to abandon our plans, our controls, our performances, our egos, and let us be humbled in the very best way to see that in Christ and Christ alone, our hope is found and all other ground is sinking sand.

51:42

Lord, thank you for your gospel. And thank you for your Holy Spirit. Thank you that we are not saved based on how well we love the word and how well we love our neighbor.

51:54

We are saved based on how well you loved the word and how well you loved your neighbor, us.

52:00

And that while we were yet sinners, you died for us. And you reconciled us and made us new creations.

52:07

Lord, as a new creation, as ones who are saved, would you let us now grow in grace?

52:16

And like we began today with the father who shares with his children, Lord, would you raise up our men to be godly men, godly singles, godly husbands, godly fathers, godly grandfathers, and men and women and children who show the world the truth of the love of God.