FBC Spring Bible Conference

Good evening. I'm glad you made it out on this Monday evening. Looking forward to a good service a good time together in God's Word and to be encouraged From the Word of God tonight. I want to begin tonight with in in this blue book with number eight.

The theme of Mark's message tonight is encouragement in marriage and One passage I was thinking of reading was Ephesians chapter 5 which of course is a the passage of Exhortation to husbands and wives encouraging them to be what they ought to be and so forth but in that passage Christ the Paul makes the analogy that marriage is a picture of the bride of Christ and You know Christ and his church the church being his bride.

So the two songs we're gonna sing tonight have to do with The Bride of Christ so begin with number eight in this blue book this supplement book and It's this hymn blessed be the tie that binds and let's stand shall we as we sing?

Our hearts in Christian Heart and prayer or fears our hopes our aims our one Ports and our care we share each other's woes our mutual burdens And often for each other flow Empathizing When we a Sunderpaw is a sin word.

But we shall still be joined in hope to meet again This glorious hope Riverage by the way while each Inexpectation lives and longs to see the day From sorrow And sin, we shall be free.

And.

Perfect love and friendship reign through. All glad that. We have a friend with us tonight from out of town. Gordon Taylor has been here a few times before to speak and I'm gonna ask him to lead us in prayer tonight.

Please may be seated.

Marriage as a Picture of Christ and the Church

So I'm gonna go ahead and read that passage in Ephesians chapter 5 if you have your Copy of scriptures with you. I want to turn to that passage and follow along Ephesians 5 and begins in verse 22 and goes down to the end of the chapter.

I would want to emphasize that verse 21 because of the way verse 22 begins. Verse 21 says Submitting to one another in the fear of God. Wives he says in verse 22 Submit to your own husbands is to the Lord.

For the husband is the head of the wife as also Christ is the head of the church and he is the Savior of the body. Therefore just as the church is subject to Christ. So let the wives be to their own husbands and everything.

Husbands love your wives just as Christ also loved the church and gave himself for her. That he might sanctify and cleanse her with the washing of water by the word. That he might present her to himself a glorious church not having spot or wrinkle or any such thing.

But that she should be holy and without blemish. So husbands ought to love their own wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. For no one ever yet hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it just as the Lord does the church.

For we are members of his body of his flesh and of his bones. For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife and the two shall become one flesh. This is a great mystery, but I speak concerning Christ and the church nevertheless, let each one of you in particular so love his own wife as himself and Let the wife see that she respects her husband.

The Lord had his blood his blessing to on the reading of his word tonight. Before we sing next him and then the message. I just want to remind you that we are receiving a love offering for for Mark and Diane Chansky and The way you can give to that just there's a couple ways you can give to that if you would like to do.

So one is in that brown offering box on the table in the foyer. Just anything that goes in that box goes to the Chansky's tonight and tomorrow night. A second way you can give is online. You can go to the church Website home page faith Baptist sterling .com.

There's a little tag on the menu bar. Give online and you can go there and there's a little tile they call it that says love offering. You click on that and you can give that way and then the third option is through a mobile app.

Vanko my Vanko mobile app or whatever it is. That's those instructions are in the on the on the foyer if you want if you prefer to give online so anyway I just want to remind you of that we want to be we want to be an encouragement to the Chansky's as They have come to us this week and Mark's messages are a great encouragement to us All right before he comes to speak tonight number 165 in your hymnal.

The church is one foundation. 165 Is one foundation. Is Jesus Christ her Lord? She is his new creation. By water and the word. From heaven he came and saw To be his holy bride. With his own blood he bought her and for her life he died.

Elect from every nation. Yet one or all the earth her charter of Salvation one Lord one faith one birth one holy name she blesses partakes one holy food and to one hope she presses with every grace and Mid toil and Tribulation and tumult of her war she waits the Consummation of peace forevermore.

Till with the vision glorious. Her longing eyes are blend the great church. Victorious shall be the church at rest. Yet she on earth has Union with God the three in one and mystics we Communion With those whose rest is one.

Oh happy ones and holy Lord give us grace that we am the meek and lowly on high may dwell with thee Chansky come on ahead.

Encouragement in Marriage

Again I counted a great privilege and a delight to be able to be here. I have found being at Faith Baptist. Here, I found a true Kindred spirit and we share together alike precious faith and in these days.

This is no small thing to find a pearl of great price of a church here in Sterling, Illinois. Also, I find it striking that Gordon and Raina Taylor are here because Diane and I met them almost exactly 40 years ago in June of.

1982.

Diane had and I had been married for about 20 hours When we visited the Sycamore Baptist Church, and now here I am preaching on marriage. And in some ways I'll be telling you the rest of the story About what happened after our little honeymoon visit to Sycamore Baptist Church.

Let's take our Bibles and turn to Song of Solomon chapter 4. Song of Solomon chapter 4. Song of Solomon is just before Isaiah and just after Ecclesiastes. Song of Solomon chapter 4. I'll read the first seven verses.

How beautiful you are my darling. How beautiful you are. Your eyes are like doves behind your veil. Your hair is like a flock of goats that have descended from Mount Gilead. Your teeth are like a flock of newly shorn ewes which have come up from their washing all of which bears twins and None among them has lost her young.

Your lips are like a Scarlet thread and your mouth is lovely. Your temples are like a slice of Pomegranate behind your veil. Your neck is like the Tower of David built with rows of stones of which are hung a thousand shields.

All the round shields of the mighty men and your two breasts are like two fawns Twins of a gazelle which feed among the lilies until the cool of the day when the shadows flee. Away, I will go my way to the mountain of myrrh and to the hill of frankincense.

You are all together Beautiful my darling and there is no.

Blemish in you.

Let's pray together our Heavenly Father. We thank you that we can Meet with you in the cool of the day and we thank you that we can gather freely in this nation and be blessed by the opening up of your word and we pray that your Holy Spirit would come and That you would open up our eyes and open up our ears and do good heart work this hour.

We pray it in Jesus name Amen in a British period drama set in the early 20th century around the 1920s. You may have seen this series. There was a local farmer. His name was mr Drake and he comes down with what's called a case of dropsy otherwise known as Congestive heart failure and he becomes a patient of the small town.

Dr. Dr. Clarkston and poor mrs Drake looks on as her husband progressively swells up with excessive fluid particularly around his heart and death seems Inevitable, but who will take care of her and her several young children who are now Staring at a life without a husband and without a father.

Well, there's a nurse. Her name is Isabel Crawley and the nurse recommends to the doctor an innovative But risky surgical procedure that might save his life. It enlists the controversial substance known as adrenaline.

So nearly widowed and desperate mrs Drake approves of the procedure and a rare vial of adrenaline is ordered and it arrives from London and dr Clarkson then pierces Mr. Drake's chest cavity with this enormous needle and he begins to quickly drain off pints of heart drowning Fluid and as expected this stress to the heart induces a cardiac arrest and mr Drake's heart stops beating.

But then the nurse Crawley calmly hands to the doctor a syringe of adrenaline which is then injected directly into the heart area. Then the adrenaline acts as a cardiac jump-starter and Mr. Drake almost instantly springs again into a healthy heartbeat.

You see it was adrenaline. That was the life restoring effect in the life of Mr. Drake and in in healthy households. Adrenaline shouldn't be used only as an exotic delicacy. But it should be on tap that adrenaline of encouragement that we're talking about it.

Encouragement adrenaline for the soul. Encouragement should be part of the family daily diet. Because it brings a real healthy pulse to the whole household and so in this session together, my desire is to consider the implications of encouragement for marriage and We'll have only two main headings in our time together.

We'll consider first Husbanding and then wifing and with that simple outline. I hope nobody will get lost. So come on firstly with me to husbanding encouragement. Adrenaline for the soul as it's applied to Husbanding you see a famine of encouragement can bring a marriage to cardiac arrest.

There was an article in the Atlantic magazine years ago. It was called masters of love and it reported on four decades of research That the psychologist John Gottman conducted on Thousands of couples to discover what makes relationships work.

This esteemed Gottman Institute set up what they called the the love lab and they brought in newlywed couples and they hooked them up to Electrodes and they asked them to discuss the health of their marital Relationships and then during the discussions the electrodes measured the couple's blood flow and Heart rate and sweat production and then the couples went home and then the research contacted them six years later To find out if they were still married and as the research then studied the data that they'd gathered they found Two distinct groups there were first the masters.

Who were still married after six years and then also the disasters? Who either ended their marriages or they were miserably unhappy in their marriages now? The disasters had appeared six years earlier calm during their interviews.

But the electrodes had recorded something different in their physiology quote now from the article. Their heart rates were quick their sweat glands were active and their blood flow was fast. You see the couples who demonstrated a more active Physiology were more aggressive toward each other and quote the article says Showed signs of being in fight-or-flight mode.

When they discussed together quote again Conversing with their spouse was to their bodies like facing off with a saber-toothed tiger. And their relationship deteriorated more quickly. But on the other hand there were the masters and the masters when they were interviewed six years earlier they were calm both outwardly and Physiologically.

They were loving and warm toward each other even in times of conflict. And here was the explanation given by The Gottman's in their Atlantic article quote there is a habit of mind that the masters have Gottman explained.

Which is this they are scanning the social environment of their marriage for things that they can appreciate and say thank you for. They're building this culture of respect. Didn't you read something about respecting your husbands in?

Ephesians 5 they are building this culture of respect and appreciation very purposefully. The disasters on the other hand seem to be scanning the social environment for their partners mistakes. Because here in the disasters marriages they had a hawk eye which sees sharply.

For the bad.

But a bat's eye that doesn't see the good. Quoting now again from the article. It's not just scanning the environment. It's it's scanning the partner for what the partner is doing right or scanning him for what he's doing wrong and then Criticizing versus respecting him and expressing appreciation in summary they said this contempt.

Contempt is found to be the number one factor that tears couples apart. People who are focused on criticizing their partners miss a whopping 50 of the positive things their partners are doing and they see negatively things that are not even there.

Well, I must admit that this love love lab study convicts me as being guilty as a husband and Here Gordon Reyna is the rest of the story of what happened after June 13 1982 because Diane and I left East Moline we drove through, Illinois into Michigan crossed at Detroit into Canada eventually to Niagara Falls and then to Stratford and Toronto.

When Diane and I got married in 1982 our delightfully memorable honeymoon was stained with conflict. You see Diane spent so much time Saying farewell to her bridesmaids and sisters in Waterloo, Iowa. That our getaway from Iowa was four hours later than expected.

This is not a happy thing for a new groom and then she was so selective about the restaurant We chose in Niagara Falls. And then I sat with her on a bench on a flowery Toronto Boulevard. And I lectured her that as we were going toward the CN Tower a hand-in-hand Diagonally through the town.

I'm gonna go in this direction. She want to go in that direction. I sat her down in that flowery Boulevard and I told her that I am the leader in our relationship and That she didn't be willing to follow.

And then after watching a Shakespeare play at Stratford We quarreled about some difference of opinion that I frankly can't even remember. And the bottom line for me Was that I perceived in Diane flaws as if Raina.

I were mr. Perfect myself flaws and I Was gonna fix Diane. I was gonna fix those flaws by criticizing and correcting her and I prided myself in transparency and confrontation. But now we fast-forward.

19 years later 2001 when my dad died Unexpectedly and suddenly and and I was just stunned and I was just staggered. He was 71, but I thought sure he'd live to be 91. I'd lost my dad. My dad was my hero and the brevity of life smacked me right in the face.

And I remember waking up about three o 'clock in the morning. Staring there laying alongside of me in my bed through my tears because I lost dad and there was my darling Diane laying beside me in our bed and She had been such a fountain of blessing and goodness to me over nearly two decades and I'm used to myself.

Am I really wise to spend the precious few moments that we have together in our fleeting lives circling around her perceived quirks and flaws. Come on, Mark. I said to myself or the Lord saying to me.

Come on, Mark. Let it go. Let it go don't obsess on her blemishes. Come on Mark bask in her virtues. And I will admit Gordon arena that after 19 years that night I made a quantum leap forward in wise and loving Husbanding and even hope for some of you youngins here.

Like I think of Aaron and Diana what you're married about five months. I hope that you can be made wiser far earlier than I was made wise because Paul tells Husbands to love their wives. Pastor Brian read it to us.

Love your wives as Christ also loved the church. Ephesians 5 25 as They are loving their own bodies as you love your own bodies. Love your wife. It says in verse 28 he who loves his wife loves himself.

Now that's a mouthful Charles Hodge the great systematic theologian Perceptibly unpacks it and expounds it this way in his commentary. Listen to what he says. Marital love therefore as Much a dictate it is of nature as it is of self-love and you love your wife.

You're loving yourself and it's not and it is not as Unnatural for a man to hate his wife as it would be for him to hate himself or his own body. I mean which one of us realistically hate our own body so unnatural to do such a thing.

Hodge goes on. A Man may have a body which does not altogether suit him. He may wish it were a handsomer body a healthier one a stronger one a more active one. But still it is his body it is himself and he naturally nourishes and cherishes it as Tenderly as though it were the best and loveliest body a man ever had.

No, we all do that. Naturally gentlemen. We do don't we? Hodge goes on. So a man may have a wife. Whom we could wish to he could wish she was better or more beautiful or more agreeable. But she is his wife and by the Constitution of nature and the ordinance of God a part of himself.

In neglecting or abusing her he violates the laws of nature as well as a law of God. And it is thus that Paul presents the matter. And so we look at ourselves gentlemen and each of us can say as my own scarred Blemished odd-looking body and Diane knows I have this big nose and it's it's it's just disproportionate to the rest of my body but it's my nose and when I have a cold I take care of it and and so in the same way as as We naturally daily pamper and primp ourselves.

Because it's us our body. So I should primp my bride she deserves the same royal tender treatment as my own body.

Would get.

That's the natural way of things that Paul is arguing. Love your wife as you love your own body. We all know the famous love chapter in 1st Corinthians 13 as Paul describes the love Husbands should show also for their wives as his text.

It's so often used at weddings. Love suffers long. It's kind it doesn't envy. Love doesn't parade itself. It's not puffed up. It doesn't behave rudely. Does not seek its own. It's it's not provoked it.

Love thinks no evil. It doesn't rejoice in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth. Love bears all things hopes all things endures all things love never fails. And so so I think of my relationship with Diane she she's like an exotic and delicate vase who who deserves my my honoring and my polishing and yes my encouraging.

And not my belittling and my rough handling and my criticizing. You know what Peter says in 1st Peter chapter 3 husbands likewise dwell with your wives in understanding way giving honor to the wife as to the weaker vessel again that delicate vase as being heirs together of the grace of life that your prayers may not be hindered.

Finally all of you ought to be of one mind having compassion for one another. Love as brothers. Be Tender-hearted be courteous not returning evil for evil or reviling for reviling but on the contrary.

Blessing knowing that you were called to this that you may inherit a blessing. So gentlemen. Yes, it's true in marriage. There is still a place for loving. Confrontation, but gentlemen if you're like me, which I know you are in many ways.

We've got a dial it down. We've got to pick our battles. We've got to take on the personality of an encourager. And we've got to put off the persona of a Fault finder that can be our default setting gentlemen.

Can't be like that husbands should be. Proverbs 31 men what does it say? You know, we know about Proverbs 31 women and that's how we want our wives to be so virtuous. Well, what about the compliment of that the man side of it?

It says in 31 28 of Proverbs her children rise up and call her blessed and her husband also praises her.

We ought to be.

Praising our brides. I know some of you gentlemen you say well, I praise her. But you know what. If you're like me naturally you may praise her with an eyedropper. When you should be using a garden hose.

We need to be men who praise our brides and find their virtues. We we need gentlemen to take a page out of Solomon's husbanding manual in that song of Solomon We read early on Men must be heavy on affectionate and affirming encouragement.

Gentlemen we should find the good and We should be willing to overlook the not-so-good in our wives. See you think of the passes that I read to you in the Song of Solomon that Exemplary groom that husband.

Did you notice how he's?

Absolutely.

Extravagant in loving his bride with words of encouragement and compliment and Affirmation for instance like in 115 of the Song of Solomon Behold, you are fair my love. Behold. You are fair. You have doves eyes.

It says.

He's.

Praising her beauty. I Even read to you in 4 2 where it says your teeth are like a flock of shorn sheep Which have come up from the washing? Every one of them of which bears twins and none is barren among them.

Did you hear that? Solomon even he basks in the fact that his beautiful bride still has all her teeth and This is a stunning feature three thousand years ago, and he commends her for it. He's he's ever Scanning her life for things worthy of his appreciation and he verbally expresses what it is about her That delights him and that ought to be us gentlemen.

We ought to be.

Encouragers.

So that can be adrenaline to our wives soul. It says in Song of Solomon 6 9 you are fair my love. There is no spot in you. It says in 4 7 my dove my perfect one. There is none like you Gentlemen, that ought to be us in the way that we are Encouragers to our brides and our interactions with her should not be like confronting a saber-toothed tiger it should be like confronting a adrenaline-pouring nurturer.

I Can remember a few years ago Diane got away for a couple of days. She's got sisters in Iowa and they met together for a rendezvous in Chicago and they were gone like three days. And I still remember we had the five kids and I was taking care of the five kids.

Oh, I will be fine, honey. And there she goes off down the driveway and we're waving and and she's gone for first three hours. We're just about fine. But then Every time I walk by the window, you know, when is she coming back?

The fact of the matter is that that we know what it's like gentlemen how When our wives are with us, there's a liveliness in the household there's a Technicolor to our lives. But when our wives leave for for me and for our children our wife our life became like a black-and-white Because lost the sparkle to us I still remember her coming home from that gathering just just hugging her and and telling her about this that that honey, it was it was so dark and dingy without you because you provide things for the children and Activities and in meals and all kinds of nurturing things that when you're gone It just isn't the same and and I have over the years I think learned to be since my honeymoon Raina and Gordon a better Husband and life is good when there is this mutual love that is led by husbands being Encouragers so that's the husbanding element.

I've gone after your husband's. Okay. Okay. I'll talk to the wives, too. In fact, even at Holland for years. It's been said, you know mark He writes a book about manly dominion and mark always goes hard after the men.

But he always deals with the wives with kid gloves. Okay. I'll talk to the wives to men. Okay, I'll do that. So we've dealt with husbanding Encouragement adrenaline of the soul, but now just consider wifing wifing.

Remember at the outset I talked about mrs. Drake whom we encountered at the beginning there. She wisely helped her husband by seeing that he received strengthening adrenaline the heroic life-saving Action that she took for her husband and getting him adrenaline for his congestive heart failure.

See that epitomizes. Well her god-assigned role as a as a helper suitable as a help meet. It says in Genesis 2 18 the Lord God said it's not good that the man should be alone. I'll make him a helper suitable a helper Comparable a help meet to him this this term help meet.

It's the Hebrew word at sir. You've read the song here I raise my Ebenezer. Ebenezer means stone of help rock of help here I raise my ebony there hither by thy health help I've come and so the Lord Helped Israel to conquer the Philistines as that statement is made in first Samuel 710 that the Lord is our Ebenezer our helper our Strengthener and so too as the woman is the answer of man to help me to the man the wife is to help her husband Conquer the foes of life and so she is called a helper an answer a helper.

Suitable.

To strengthen their husbands. Now some wives fail to strengthen their husbands by infusing Strengthening adrenaline and Inadvertently hurt their husbands by overexposing them to weakening kryptonite. And Brian since you don't read Marvel Comics Kryptonite is that substance that weakens a Superman.

It's his point of Vulnerability. Some wives can be like kryptonite at times to their husbands. In fact in her book fierce woman Subtitled the power of a soft warrior Kim Wagner some of you may have read this book Fierce woman.

Kim Wagner confesses how she a high-octane Woman grew disillusioned with her husband's flawed leadership in their marriage. Her husband was the pastor of a flourishing Church. But he just didn't measure up in her mind.

Wagner Kim. Kim was critical. She was intimidating. She was impatient leaving her husband feeling like he couldn't do anything right and so he spiraled down into Discouragement. And Kim Wagner writes this she says I was repulsed by his depression.

He needed to get his act together. He needed to be a man and her husband's done by stunned her by resigning at that point from the Pastorate. And Kim says this was a real wake-up call for me and the Lord convicted Kim through 1st Peter 3 1 through 6 that she had not been a gentle and quiet spirit helper.

But rather she had been a brash and loud herder in that relationship. And Retrospectively analyzing her early marriage years kind of like me analyzing mine. She recognized how she had harshly countered her husband's leadership with her superior plan.

Her hypercritical spirit and her take-charge Personality. You see she had systematically she wrote I had systematically.

Emasculated him and.

Wagner isn't alone in her critical spirit in confessing her own critical wifely tendencies. Martha Peeth never heard her before Raina. Martha Peeth confessed that she too was that same kind of a fierce woman and that's her tendency.

Martha hits the mark by saying that as Her husband's helpmate Martha writes I need. He doesn't need my helpful suggestions, and he doesn't need my Sarcastic put-downs because they're not helpful in that sense not saying a wife shouldn't ever come alongside a man and criticize a man, but not to do it in a sarcastic condescending way Martha writes for a wife Martha says a crucial battle is fighting the common plague of critical and Disrespectful talk to her husband and you realize that the book of Proverbs make no small thing of this very issue.

Let me just read what it says in Proverbs 21 9 it says better to dwell in a corner of a housetop And in a house shared with a contentious woman. Then it says in 25 24 Better to dwell in a corner of a house cop than in a house shared with a contentious woman.

You said but you repeated that I know but the scriptures repeat that it's there in both verses and then it says in 2119 better to dwell in a wilderness then with a contentious and angry woman and 2715 says a continual dripping on a very rainy day and a contentious woman are alike.

You see there is a pattern there that Martha peace talks about she finds herself to struggle with that very pattern you see a husband needs his wife to be the reviving corner in the fight of Life. You've seen boxers.

They go out in the middle the ring and they get pummeled for three minutes, but then at the rounds and they can retreat to their corner for.

Reinvigorating.

Encouragement and Refreshment. And in the corner what happens there is getting rubbed down on the back that exhausted boxer. Here's things like this. Okay, okay, you took some hits but you also delivered some good ones.

And well, you are the man you have what it takes to get back out there and to take down that Goliath Ladies that is your role in the fight of life for your man. Wives are to be that strengthening corner in their husband's life and the Adrenaline encouragement is a crucial ingredient in.

Their.

Helper Coaching it says in first Thessalonians 511 after all therefore encourage one another and build up one another all the more as you are doing you are the answers. The help meets of your husband.

A Husband comes home to his wife. That's his retreating to his corner. He's often bruised and beaten and dear ladies. He doesn't need the kryptonite of a critical spirit. But he needs the adrenaline of a cheering.

Encourager.

Ladies, you are to be your husband's helpers and not his hurters. All wives one writer says all wives are daughters of Eve. Who was enticed into destroying her marriage and her world? By a craving for.

More.

There in the garden of Eden God had nestled her comfortably in a paradise stocked with Unimaginable plenty including trees with low-hanging fruit and a good even a very good husband. But paradise wasn't enough.

Was it for Eve? Eve wanted.

More.

More, and it's it's that seed of dissatisfaction that the serpent craftily Watered because he said to the woman didn't he in 3 -1. Indeed has God said you shall not eat from every tree in the garden. You see the serpent hissed the insinuation that God was stingily Restricting her from something better.

And you may have your man. And he may not be what you wish he were and you want him to be better and you're not Satisfied. That's where fierce woman Kim Wagner writes this. Eve's ingratitude took her from the lush gardens of peaceful contentment and Drove her into the wilderness of desolate places always seeking painful longing insatiable hunger empty dreams.

But Kim Gardner gives this little statement herself her relationship with her pastor husband Leroy she says while in the car driving to my first meeting with Anne a Girlfriend involved in a forbidden fruit affair because her husband Gary failed to gratify her emotional needs.

While in the car, I called my husband to have him pray for me and before I hung up I asked my husband Leroy to give me one word. One word from a husband's perspective. One word of counsel that I might need to give to Anne and the word that Leroy gave was Gratitude tell her regarding her husband.

She needs to be grateful because you see no doubt Leroy himself had felt the burn of his own Kimberly's Eve.

DNA.

Never a dr. Laura Schlesinger. A Little bit of a blast from the past. She she's she wrote a book called the proper care and feeding of husbands and it grew out of her receiving and Evaluating thousands of comments from men all around the country and she has a chapter that she writes in The book the proper care and feeding of husbands, which is written to women and the chapter is called listen to this now.

You're a nag. I.

Love quoting women because I don't want to take that perspective here. Here's what Laura wrote to other women in marriages. The universal complaint of men who emailed me and my website with their opinions about the proper care and feeding of husbands was that their wives criticize complain nag rarely compliment or express appreciation are Difficult to satisfy and basically not as nice to them as they'd be to a stranger ringing the doorbell at 3 a .m.

She goes on. Many men divulged how they were esteemed outside of the home as competent professionals by their colleagues. But were treated inside the home as a bumbling buffoon by their wives. Like Jim wrote quote now to Laura.

He's wrote in an email. I've always had superlative evaluations on my performance at work. But at home, I can't do anything, right? I sometimes spend several minutes and thought on a task at hand trying to decide exactly what to do.

And after weighing the pros and cons, I make a decision and I act and almost inevitably I get why in the world. Did you do that? What's the matter of with you? What were you? Thinking that was so stupid and the man says in conclusion.

It's just something that wears you down like erosion. Like dwelling on the corner of a roof on a rainy day, right? You see discouraging talk can can make a man's home kind of be like a kryptonite corner.

But wives should know that there's a great upside to the wise bridling and kind use of their tongues because it says in Proverbs 15 for a wise a soothing tongue. In contrast isn't a kryptonite effect a soothing tongue it says is a tree of Life, you see ladies kind and encouraging words from a wife to a husband.

They're adrenaline. I'm telling you that they send a man back out into the ring singing and swinging instead of sulking. It's adrenaline when you encourage us ladies. Like your husbands won't tell you about this like I'm telling you about it.