TLP 72: Parents Who Pray | Peaceful Parenting, Part 4

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I know many of you aren't experiencing peace in your parenting. I know you're tempted to blame your kids and your spouse for the anxiety and anger you feel.

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But God wants to revolutionize your heart today. He wants His peace to grow from the inside out, not from the outside in.

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Welcome to Truth. Love. Parent. Where we use God's Word to become intentional, premeditated parents.

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Here's your host, A .M. Brewster. Have you ever been anxious for your family? Have you ever worried about the future of your child?

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Have you ever found it hard to concentrate at work because of the weight on your chest because of the issues going on at home and you just can't ignore it?

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Well today, we have the ecstatic joy of learning how to cure that anxiety. But more on that in a minute.

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It's been a little while since I encouraged you to LSR. Everyone who can hear my voice today is listening and learning.

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But have you subscribed to TLP? Have you shared this episode yet? I hope you will. And I also hope that you will rate and review us.

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We'd be honored if every one of you took the time to rate and review us on iTunes and share this podcast with the other

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Christian parents in your life. Okay, as we delve into today's passage, we'll examine our final peace prerequisite in order to achieve our first peace promise.

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I hope you're as excited as I am. There aren't enough reams of paper to record the lives that have been resurrected, the anxiety that's been destroyed, and the phobias that have been put to flight by the passage we're going to study today.

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But before we take a look at this life -changing truth, it's imperative we review the two peace prerequisites we've seen so far in order to understand the full picture.

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The first is our responsibility to God. This goes far beyond simply being saved.

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Many people use that phrase to describe a state that denies the necessity to do or be anything else.

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Having a right relationship with God does include being justified by the work of Christ and the cross, but there is so much more that must be done to glorify

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Him in our relationship. As an example, Philippians lists joy in God as the necessary outflowing of our salvation.

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Rejoicing means to find our soul's sense of happiness and joy in nothing else other than God and His truth.

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Let's see what this looks like in everyday life. I'm going to choose an extreme example because only a singular focus on God can produce an atmosphere for peace to thrive.

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Most parents say they love their kids, but can that love for our kids produce peace?

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Can liking our kids, being proud of their accomplishments, providing for their needs, or going to their atrocious pan concerts produce biblical peace?

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These actions carry no merit at all if removed from the proper motivation. Our motivation in all things must be

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God and His glory. Parenting really should never be about our kids. Parenting must be an act of worship to God.

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So when I reflect on my son's yellow belt or my daughter's high score, what should I actually be joying in?

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Well, there are many examples, but here could just be a few. Thank you, Lord, for my children. Thank you,

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Lord, for the gifts you so graciously bestowed on my kids. Thank you, Lord, for the opportunities my children have to grow and mature for your glory.

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Dear Lord, please help me lead my children in a way that they understand the importance of using their talents and service for you.

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And of course, I could go on. This is rejoicing in God in one particular way.

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And this rejoicing can happen even in difficult situations. Thank you, Lord, for bringing this sickness into my child's life.

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Help him to see your hand in this and teach him to depend solely on you. Thank you, Lord, that my son was unable to earn his yellow belt.

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Help me parent him in such a way that he understands the benefits of failure and learns to fix his mistakes to honor and glorify you.

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In order to fulfill this peace prerequisite, we must not only joy in God, but we need to do it all the time.

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Because it says, rejoice in the Lord always. Again, I will say, rejoice. The second peace prerequisite is our responsibility to everyone else.

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I cannot have peace in my life if I'm at odds with people in my life. Please note, you can always have personal peace if other people hate and attack you, but you will never have personal peace if you are the attacker.

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Our motivation must be twofold. First of all is love for others. Our gentleness is due all men because God says we are to love, which means to seek the best interest of all men.

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And the second is this, we have an understanding that God is near. Not only is the Lord's return imminent, meaning we should be excited to have him return and find us faithfully fulfilling the mission he's commissioned us, but we must also understand that God is spiritually near as well.

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We are indwelt by him and should therefore never feel comfortable doing anything that attacks his character, because we're commanded, let your gentle spirit be known to all men.

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The Lord is near. When we plant our joy in God and water it with love for all mankind, we take the first necessary steps toward achieving peace.

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And there's one more vital peace prerequisite to understand before we can achieve that soul rest. We have a responsibility to God and to everyone else, but we also have a responsibility to ourselves.

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God says, be anxious for nothing. Each time this verse has blessed my life, it has also brought severe conviction.

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Be anxious for nothing? One of the reasons it jars me is its very foundation is yet another divine generality in which it just, it just seems incredibly impossible.

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This command is don't ever be anxious. I mean, has the weight of that command ever really sunk into your heads?

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Don't ever. Well this carries with it a number of important lessons. The first lesson is tied in just the simple truth.

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And there really isn't much to say here. Don't be anxious. If you're anxious, you're disobeying. If you're worrying, you're disobeying.

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If you're fearful, you're disobeying. If you're disobeying, you're sinning, and it's that simple. Now please understand that I'm not talking about the strange chemical tingles we may experience due to physical complications.

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I've only ever had what could be considered panic attacks like two or three times, and all those times have occurred while I played host to a bacterial convention called

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Candida. Feelings of anxiety is a common symptom of Candida, but Candida anxiety doesn't grow out of worry, doubt, or indecision.

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It's brought on by physical stimulus. Before we continue, however, let's remind ourselves what feelings are.

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Feelings are responses to stimuli. Sometimes that stimuli is physical and sometimes it's mental.

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It also is vital to note that mental stimulus is far more powerful than physical. Negative emotional responses due to physical health problems occur, but they occur far less often than we're led to believe by the medical establishment.

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The vast majority of times we feel anxiety are a result of our thoughts, and it's this anxiety caused by our machinations that's the focus of our study today.

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When we dwell on our troubles, meditate on our confusion, dream about our impotence, or wallow in our pain, we feel those chemical reactions, disobey

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God's command, and forfeit our peace. This issue is a simple truth, but there's also the second thing, the complicated deception.

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And way more could be said about this than we have time for, but here goes. The medical community would have us believe that every abnormality we face, whether physical or mental, is a result of a disease or a disorder.

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They preach it from their highest perches, that we are victims of factors we have no control over. Again, I don't have the time or inclination at this point to broach this topic now, due to the requirements for proper handling, but I will say this one thing.

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When man's studies, opinions, and philosophies contradict God's word, throw out man's studies, opinions, and philosophies.

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If we transfer our faith from God's perfect wisdom and omniscience to man's ability to reason himself out of his problems, then we've surrendered every opportunity for real, lasting peace.

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God says, don't be anxious. So stop making excuses for your anxiety.

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Stop citing research. Stop quoting your shrink. Stop hanging out with friends who coddle your deception.

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But you say, I can't just turn it off. Well, firstly, no one ever really told you to. Secondly, the solution doesn't come through your strength.

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The beautiful reality is that God does not leave us with an insurmountable command. He provides us the ability to obey.

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What you cannot do, he can, because he gives us this provision. He says, be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God.

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Now before we name the provision, I must warn you that just as our peace promises have prerequisites, so too does the promise of provision.

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There are conditions. God will provide the peace necessary to wipe all doubt and concern from your mind.

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But you must take the first steps. When you encounter a conflict, perhaps it's a row with your child, your first and immediate response must be twofold.

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The first is, talk to God about it. The last thing I want is for this to sound trite.

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Unfortunately, so many divine truths have been spoken too oft by disingenuous lips. They've seemingly been stripped of their significance.

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But we must resist the urge to kick against the pricks, no matter how trite it may sound. Prayer is a potentially powerful form of communication.

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I say potentially, because if it's avoided or done wrong, it has no efficacy at all. But when we communicate with God intentionally, genuinely, and frequently, all the things that didn't make sense about our faith come together in perfect harmony.

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Do you want to kill fear? Talk to God. David learned this important truth and he shared it with us frequently in the

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Psalms. When I'm afraid, I put my trust in you, Psalm 56 .3. I sought the

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Lord and he answered me and delivered me from my fears, Psalm 34 .4. Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death,

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I will fear no evil, for you are with me. Your rod and your staff, they comfort me, Psalm 23 .4.

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Cast your burden on the Lord and he will sustain you, Psalm 55 .22. Prayer without ceasing really becomes a reality when we take our every concern to God's will.

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But when we pour our problems into God's ear, we must do it with the right attitude. So the second command is to thank

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God for it. Listen, my friends, please stop celebrating suffering.

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There's a philosophical movement of light in the Christian community that's enamored with suffering. We're encouraged to be honest and raw when it comes to our pains.

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I've heard radio counselors point to the Psalms and admonish us to embrace our suffering, argue with God and not hold it in.

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But that's not really the biblical approach. Yes, David suffered, and yes, he put those thoughts and feelings to paper, but he never ended with suffering.

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The pain wasn't the goal. He constantly pointed back to God. Psalm 38 beautifully illustrates this.

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In verses 1 through 14, David lays out pain too numerous to go into here. But in verse 15, he makes the statement,

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He then continues his lament through verse 20, but ends the Psalm with, These are not the words of a man glorying in the pain.

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He's focused on the salvation that will overcome his suffering. We need to start celebrating salvation instead of suffering.

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God wants us to take our woes to him in thanksgiving. Do we need to take another moment to let this one sink in?

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How can God ask me to thank him for my cancer? How can I be thankful for my profligate son?

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What kind of God would ask me to thank him for my miscarriage? Well, the same

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God who promised to work out all of those things for your greatest good and his greatest glory. The God who's powerful enough to help and heal.

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The God we're trusting for our internal salvation. The God who created us for a purpose and empowers us to fulfill that purpose.

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When we trust God's purposes and trials, he grafts onto our lives a response that was previously foreign to us.

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When we see his salvation, the suffering scatters. When we peer on his provision, the pain pales.

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Let's look at Isaiah 26, 3. The steadfast of mind you will keep in perfect peace because he trusts in you.

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God promises to provide the ability to not be afraid, which we call peace, but only when we acknowledge him in all things.

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This starts with us viewing him as our only source of joy, which will inevitably pour out into all the lives around us through our gentle spirit, and ends with a calm assurance that God will keep his promises.

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Let's look at this awesome picture he's painting. He says to us, delight in me more than anything else in the universe.

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Love everyone else because you love me. Trust me to supply everything necessary for your life and godliness, and because of that, you will have peace.

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And before we end today, let's take a look at a very real case study. It's not necessarily a parenting illustration, but it is about my father.

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Have you ever really asked yourself what it's like to lose everything? Well, a few years back, my father developed a bacterial infection in one of his vertebrae.

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Over time, the infection grew, putting intense pressure on his spine, and he had to stop working. His legs shriveled due to lack of use.

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The medical bills piled because neither of my parents had insurance because they were self -employed and they had forgone it.

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After the infection was finally removed via surgery, my father was paralyzed from the waist down. But due to the over $200 ,000 in medical bills, my parents had to declare bankruptcy and they sold nearly every possession, including their home.

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With a little more than the clothes on their back, their car, and my mother's sewing machines, which were the only source of income for them, my parents moved in with my sister.

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Now, unless you've been through a similar circumstance, to ask you to imagine the pressures my parents were under would be akin to asking a worm to understand why the bird has to eat him.

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But I praise God that these Philippians 4 promises were vibrantly fulfilled and living color in my family.

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I saw changes in my father I wondered for years were ever going to come. His passion for God, his interactions with people, and his response to his upturned life were nothing short of miraculous.

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And you know what? Even though fear and doubt crept in from time to time, my parents were a shining beacon of peace and contentment.

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One of the things that spectators just couldn't seem to understand about my parents was their grateful spirit. They were thankful for all the things they still had, including my dad's life.

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Ladies and gentlemen, what we're talking about today is not some pie in the sky and the sweet by and by little talk. This is a hardcore, rip out your self -worshiping heart and transplant a

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God -beating drive that pushes all of this earthly care so far to the periphery that it doesn't even register anymore.

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This is more than radical. This is bigger than dynamic. This is God at work in your life and parenting. This is taking everything you thought was true about life, just burning it to ash and embracing a paradigm you could never have dreamed up.

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Only God can command us to never fear, and he has. And only God can provide us the means to do it, which he does.

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Our responsibility to the cares of this life is simple. Talk to God about it, and thankfully trust him to do exactly what he's promised, exactly as he always has.

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Psalm 9419, when the cares of my heart are many, your consolations cheer my soul.

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Psalm 118 .6, the Lord is on my side, I will not fear. What can man do to me?

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And Lamentations 3 .5, you came near when I called on you. You said, do not fear.

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Please don't forget that you can read our show transcript and download our free episode notes from truthloveparent .com.

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So far, we've discussed the three peace prerequisites. But on our next episode, we'll look at the first peace promise in Philippians 4, and glory in the dynamic effect it can have on our parenting.

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Of course, I encourage all of you to subscribe on iTunes and leave a review while you're there. And don't forget to follow us on social media.

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You can find all of our social sites at truthloveparent .com. And of course, you can always ask our counselors a question at counseloratruthloveparent .com.

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I know many of you aren't experiencing peace in your parenting. I know you're tempted to blame your kids and your spouse for the anxiety and anger you experience.

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But God wants to revolutionize your heart today. He wants his peace to grow from the inside out, not from the outside in.

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Act on these peace prerequisites, and you will see a change in your life and in your family.

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See you next time. Truth, Love, Parents is part of the

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Evermind Ministries family and is dedicated to helping you become an intentional premeditated parent.

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Join us next time as we search God's word for the truth your family needs today.