GOD'S DESIGN FOR THE FAMILY (Introduction)

Got your attention, didn't we? All right. Hey, welcome to the Lord's Day gathering

I'm so glad that you've chosen to be here to worship with us today. It's it's great to be back with you

I I certainly enjoyed my time last week down in Florida at River Bend I was able to speak at the installation service of Josh Brown, which many of you know him

He he was installed as the preaching teaching elder there at River Bend And it was a great time to celebrate with him.

But but being here with you. This is this is where I belong This is what I long for.

This is what I love and so I desperately missed last week But I heard her pastor

Jeremiah preached an excellent message and and I hope you were blessed by that time

We after all are a covenant community. We are a people who have covenanted together

To to pursue kingdom -mindedness to grow in the fear and knowledge of the

Lord together to disciple one another and So, of course, I hate missing this gathering because this is where really so much of our

Spiritual formation takes place. I was telling the the the serving team and the band this morning.

We were gathered to pray I said I'm becoming more and more convictionally convinced of Just how formative the

Lord's Day gathering is to the Saint It's not just essential and and and just like the writer of Hebrews says not to neglect the gathering of the

Saints it is probably the most formative thing that a

Christian can do and and when we think of when we think of being formed as Christians and we think of sanctification and growing in the

Lord then We oftentimes we want everything now, we're a fast -food generation

We think well, man, I can be sanctified and if I'm you know in order to be sanctified real fast enough You know

It's got to be all my Bible readings It's got to be all these YouTube videos and all these other sermons and all this other stuff and all those are icing on the

Cake, but they're not the cake the The way that the Lord has designed it is the

Lord's Day gathering of a covenant people that have come together To truly form them and and I've said it before I believe that sanctification is not a microwave.

It's a crockpot and So the constant week in week out is forming you under God's design and God's Word And so thank you for not neglecting it because to neglect it is to neglect the care of your very souls and The souls of your brothers and sisters that are here

So thank you covenant members for your commitment to bring your gifts to the benefit of this body

Thank you for giving of your time Thank you for giving of your resources For as Paul says in Ephesians the building up of the body when all the parts are working properly

The body is built up in love, but I also want to say thank you to those that are guests and our regular attenders

Thank you for being here We're so glad that you're with us and we want you to know that you are truly loved by the people of God The people of God love you because we have been greatly loved by God and so we return that love and we care for you and one of the ways that we care for you is if You're a first time and and you got one of these connect cards

We would ask that if you're willing fill that out and drop it into the offering plate when the offering comes by There's a section on here

You can you can learn more about what it means to be a part of this particular covenant body of believers

But more importantly, there's a section at the bottom that says how can we pray for you a lot of churches will hand these connect cards out because the reason is is we want to get your contact information because we want to Seal the deal.

We want to get you here. That's not the purpose of this This is so that we have a name and we have something that we can specifically pray for you

We have a group of believers that come in here on Tuesday mornings every Tuesday to pray by the way church

You are welcome Everyone is welcome between 7 and 8 to come and pray and we can pray very specifically the elders can pray for you

The deacons can be praying specifically for you Everyone has prayer requests don't we if you don't have something to pray for then you're not really thinking hard enough because I do

And so if you wouldn't mind just fill one of those out. That's one way that we can show love to you

And speaking of prayer every week before we start our service off before We officially launch with a call to worship

We want to acknowledge and we want to pray for another local church

We're not the only Saints gathered today. Are we? There's Saints all over the world gathered there's

Saints all over this community gathered and so we choose a different church and we have a rotation of churches that we

Intentionally pray for as a people for their Lord's Day gathering and today we want to pray for Walnut Street Baptist Walnut Street Baptist, you've seen the big brick church building over off the highway

We have some connections there. Pastor Jeremiah himself grew up in that church and and was

Understood and saw the beauty of Christ in that church and was baptized in that church

So we have some some serious roots there and the brothers and sisters are gathering this morning So if you wouldn't mind bow with me, let's pray for Walnut Street Baptist this morning

Dear Heavenly Father Lord, we thank you for bringing us together

We thank you for your graciousness and prescribing the local church we thank you for your your mercy and grace in our lives of just how

The Holy Spirit works in and through each of us in that And Lord, we want to lift up our brothers and sisters at Walnut Street Baptist Church this morning

Oh God, we love our brothers and sisters there. We we love them dearly We long to see them flourish in their walk with you.

We long to see them grow together as a people We long to see their leadership to have wisdom and discernment

God, I pray that Lord, I pray that you would be honored in their worship today God I pray is that people gathers together that they would be molded

That they would see the beauty of Christ That they would be confronted with the the immensity of a triune

God God the Father that set his love upon them from before the foundations of the world

God the Son who who sought after them Redeemed them by blood ransom and God the

Holy Spirit who now Seals them as a guarantee for their inheritance and glory

Lord, I pray that you would Work mightily in their midst Lord that sanctifying work in their hearts

That of you who began a good work in them and you will see it to completion at the day of Christ Jesus You are working in them.

Even now God help them have patience Understanding as they are committed to to your word and your truth

Lord I pray that the pastors there would continue to hide behind the The cross they would continue to hide behind your word because you are

King Well, we thank you be with them help them to know that we greatly love them in Christ's name.

Amen. Amen Let's stand. Let's start off our service this morning with a call to worship our call to worship this morning comes from 1st

Chronicles 16 Verses 28 through 34 and we have laid it out as they read and response as we always do

This is this here is a portion of David's song of praise Where he says ascribe to the

Lord Oh families of the peoples Ascribe to the

Lord the glory do his name I'll worship the

Lord and the splendor of holiness tremble before him all the earth Let the heavens be glad and let the earth rejoice

Let the sea roar and all that fills it Then shall the trees of the forest sing for joy before the

Lord Oh give thanks to the Lord for he is good

And all God's people said Amen, I love that David says that a portion there when he says then shall the trees of the forest sing for joy before the

Lord all of creation declares his glory does it not and we are without excuse all man sees the

Creation and sees that it's pointing to a creator that is sovereign over all of creation

And that's the God that we have been brought into union with To the rest of creation that all of The the pagan nations the pagan peoples out there.

He is their judge and executioner. Oh To us.

He's our father Because of the blood of Christ that has brought us into this glorious union with him and together

Let's pray to that great God, let's pray a prayer of adoration before we sing dear

Heavenly Father God we bow before you once again, and we come before you as a people

Acknowledging that even the trees cry out your praise God the mountains declare your glory

As as immense as the ocean is that we see and it's overwhelming it is it is nothing compared to to the

Glory of the one that created it God you are

You are worthy of all praise this morning When we say that Lord let it not be lip service

But but a truth that we as your people are declaring oh God you are worthy of praise

You and you alone But I pray that this morning in the hearts of all of your children here that that we would see

Your beauty in a greater way That we would grow in the fear and knowledge of you

May you be worshipped today in our midst and be honored in Christ's name

You will go before you will lead the way we have found her

Oh With joy now I got his for us the father's love is a strong and mighty

Fortress raise your voice now. No love is greater

Who can stand against us if my God is for? I Even when

I fall Even when I turn back still your love is sure you will not offend

You will not forsake you will cheer me on With never -ending

Joy now I got his for the father's love

Oh, it's now No No Will not defeat us he who gave his son to Holds me

One more time neither hide nor dare Will not defeat us he who gave his son to With joy now

I got his for us the father's love is a strong and mighty

Fortress raise your voice now. No love is greater

Joy now I got his for the father's love

Oh, it's now Let's come in The majesty

Come behold See Oh Sing home forever,

O holy God Come and worship the holy

God Who else can rescue me from my pain?

Who else would offer His only Son? Who else invites me to call

Him Father? Only a holy

God Only my holy God Come and behold

Him The one and the only

Sing home forever, O holy

God Worship the holy God Come and behold

Him The one and the only

Cry out, sing holy Forever, O holy

God Come and worship the holy God Behold the wondrous mystery

In the dawning of the King He the theme of Heaven's praises

Roped in frail humanity In our longing, in our darkness

Now the light of life has come Look to Christ who condescended

Took on flesh to ransom us

Come behold the wondrous mystery He the perfect Son of Man In His living, in His suffering

Never trace nor stain of sin See the true and better idol

And have saved the hell -bound man His assured and sure fulfillment

Of the law in Him we stand Behold the wondrous mystery

Christ the Lord upon the tree In the stead of ruined sinners

Hangs the Lamb in victory Sing it out See the price of our redemption

See the Father's plan unfold Bringing many sons to glory

Grace unmeasured, love untold Behold the wondrous mystery

Slinged by death the God of life But no grave could ever restrain

Him Praise the Lord, He is alive What a foretaste of deliverance

How unwavering our hope Christ in power resurrected

As He will be when He comes What a foretaste of deliverance

How unwavering our hope Christ in power resurrected

As we will be when He comes

Yes Christ resurrected as we will be when

He comes And we now rest in that resurrection, don't we? For it is sure, it is absolute

And in the meantime As we are constantly being reminded of We fall short

We fall into sin How many of you have fallen prey to sin this week?

How many of you have fallen prey to sin this morning? How many have fallen prey to sin in the last hour?

It's constant, is it not? No, we long for glory as Paul says

Who will deliver me from this wretched flesh? But in the meantime we acknowledge our sin

We confess our sin Often times we must confess our sins one to another

But ultimately we must confess our sins To the one that has paid for our sins

And we do that corporately on Sundays As we gather through a prayer of confession and assurance

We confess But we also worship and praise

God For the great assurance that we stand in That there is therefore no condemnation

For those who are in Christ Jesus, Amen So bow with me, let us pray this prayer of confession

And subsequently assurance in that Father, we just sang of that great truth

And we sang these words See the price of our redemption See the

Father's plan unfold Bringing many sons to glory Grace unmeasured, love untold

Oh Lord, we love that truth

We believe that truth Lord, we rest in that truth

Oh, but our flesh wars against us It does the things that we don't want to do

And we don't do the things that we want to do Each of us individually has fallen short

And we are so reminded constantly Of our desperate and continual need of Christ The true and better Adam The Savior The representative

For none of us, none of us could stand

If we could strip ourselves from the hand of Christ We would because our flesh wars against us

Oh, but we cannot because Christ said All that the Father gives me, I have not lost one

Oh, thank you But we confess our sin before you this morning

Both individually and corporately There's so many areas where we as a covenant people

Together as a church, we fall short We do not obey you as we ought We do not do the things that we should

We do not live fully and completely And holistically for you We find ourselves at odds with each other

We find ourselves harming each other We find ourselves not forgiving each other

We find ourselves harboring bitterness And frustrations and disunity We find ourselves

God Falling short of the standard Of what you've called us to be

And we confess that to you this morning And we confess our desperate need for you

To work in our lives and mold us and change us To be that forgiving people To be a diligent people that serves you mightily

But in the meantime as you are sanctifying us Oh Lord, we rest in the assurance

That as we said it, you've not lost one of us And you will finish that work in us

That we stand boldly before you this morning Not because of our own righteousness or perfection

We get to stand and sing these truths to you Because of the righteousness of Christ that is imputed to us

And we cannot lose it For we thank you

Mold us Work in us this morning Our scripture reading this morning comes from Genesis 2

Verses 15 -24 It says the

Lord God took the man and put him in the garden of Eden To work it and keep it And the

Lord God commanded the man saying You may surely eat of every tree of the garden

But of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil You shall not eat For in the day that you eat it

You shall surely die Then the Lord God said

It is not good that man should be alone I will make him a helper fit for him

Now out of the ground the Lord God Had formed every beast of the field And every bird of the heavens

And brought them to the man to see what he would call them And whatever the man called every living creature

That was its name The man gave names to all livestock

And to the birds of the heavens And to every beast of the field But for Adam there was not found a helper fit for him

So the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall upon the man And while he slept

The Lord God took one of his ribs And closed up its place with flesh And the rib that the

Lord God had taken from the man He made into a woman And brought her to the man

And the man said This at last is bone of my bones And flesh of my flesh

She shall be called woman Because she was taken out of a man Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother

And hold fast to his wife And they shall become one flesh

Lord we ask once again that you would work in our hearts and minds

Lord as we talk about God's design for the family today Father I pray that you would mold us

Father I pray that you would help us to see your truth Before the throne of God above I have a strong great high priest

Whose name is love lives in me

My name is engraven on his hands My name is written on his heart

I know that while in heaven he stands No tongue can give me than his deed

No tongue can give me than his deed Satan tells me to despair

And tells me of the guilt within From word

I look and see him there He made a man to mourn my sin

Because of sin the Savior died

My sinful soul is counted free For God the just is satisfied

To look on him and pardon me To look on him and pardon me

Hallelujah, hallelujah

Praise the one risen son of God Golden gift of his own blood

My perfect spotless righteousness The great unchangeable

I am The king of glory and of grace

One with himself I cannot die

My soul is purchased by his blood My life is given with Christ on high

With Christ my Savior, oh my God With Christ my

Savior, oh my God Hallelujah, hallelujah

Praise the one risen son of God Hallelujah Praise the one risen son of God My Jesus I love

I'm no bully of sin

I resign My gracious redeemer

My Savior of life

If ever I loved you

My Jesus tis now

Because you purchased my pardon

I love you for wearing

The thorns on your right

If ever I loved you

My Jesus tis now

Because I'll praise you

As long as humanity

And say when the dead do rise

Cold on my right If ever

I Jesus tis now

Mentions of glory In this delight

I'll ever In every soul rise

I'll sing with a glittering

Cry of pride

If ever I My Jesus tis now

If ever I My Jesus tis now

Yes, thank you Jesus so much Father, Lord, we praise you this morning, Jesus Thank you for loving us so much

For loving me so much, Lord Lord, I'm so unworthy

Lord, but I'm so grateful That you love me enough to save my soul

Lord, I praise you for this These people this morning here,

Lord The saints that gather here this morning, Lord To worship and praise you, Father What an awesome worship service,

Lord I just pray that you would be with the remainder of this service, Lord I pray that you would be with Pastor Nathan As he comes and stands before us this morning,

Lord And preaches your word boldly, Lord Lord, we're so grateful,

Lord And I pray that you would bless this offering That we're about to take up in obedience to you

Father, I love you, praise you Ask all these things in Jesus' precious and holy name In all of God's people's sin, amen

As I was thinking, as we were singing that song If ever

I loved you, my Jesus, it is now And how far

My love for him falls short But as we prayed earlier in our confession of Our confession and assurance

His love is perfect And as we sang there in that song You loved me first His love is true and sure and absolute and perfect Amen Well, God's design

God's design is good God's ways

Are always good That's because God himself is good

And all that he does Is good

And when he spoke the universe Into motion by the word of his mouth

He then declared It is good And then

We see the evil one slithering in, don't we? He slithers into this good creation

With, what did God really say? Comes to Eve and He says, actually

Actually, Eve, I just want you to know He's holding out on you What he said was bad

Was eating the fruit of that tree there But that's not bad

It's actually what is good And he's just holding out on you, Eve He's keeping the good for himself

And if you want to get some of that good If you want to be like him

Don't let him trick you Go ahead And eat of the fruit

And this game plan Of the evil one was Was so successful that That he's gone ahead and kept the playbook, has he not?

This is This is something that works And so he's continued His hatred for God And subsequently

God's design Has driven him Passionately to destroy that good design

And you all know the story When Adam Was handed the fruit by his wife

And takes a bite He fell prey to the trick

The evil one attained an army of children Seeking to do the same

For everyone from henceforth Was still born in sin and enmity

With the creator and his good creation And they were all primed for the deception

Here's the thing What Satan quickly realized though Was that He was unable to destroy

God's design That's what he desired But he could not

The law of God Was still written on their hearts After all

He is the creator And all of creation Bears his fingerprints

You cannot look around As we said earlier And not see the glory of God The trees cry out to the glory of God The mountains

The waters The stars The sun The moon All of it

Cries out because it bears the fingerprint of the creator And the pinnacle of his creation

The one tasked with the authority and care Of the rest of all of it

Was made in his very image Not just bearing his fingerprint

But actually created in his image Though marred by sin

They still bear the imago Dei The image of God So much so that the evil one would love

To thoroughly destroy God's design within this creation A design that's so ingrained into this creation

That even sin cannot thoroughly do away with it He has merely resigned

To distort God's good creation and design

His desire was to destroy But he cannot So he must seek to distort

And one of the ways that he has successfully Distorted God's good design Is in the area that we are going to be looking at Over the next few weeks

As we come to this portion within Ephesians In chapter 5 verse 22

As a matter of fact if you have a copy of God's word You can go ahead and turn there with me But it is where we see

A picture of God's design For the family And like I said we are going to be in this

Small series for a few weeks And we are going to this week

Read the whole of this section On through the first four verses of chapter 6 But I want us to read here in Ephesians chapter 5

Starting in verse 22 This is where we left off when we stopped Ephesians a few weeks back

Paul says Wives Submit to your own husbands As to the Lord For the husband is the head of the wife

Even as Christ is the head of the church His body And is himself its savior

Now as the church submits to Christ So also wives should submit in everything

To their husbands Husbands Love your wives

As Christ loved the church And gave himself up for her That he might sanctify her

Having cleansed her by the washing of water With the word So that he might present the church to himself

In splendor without spot or wrinkle Or any such thing That she might be holy and without blemish

In the same way husbands should love their wives As their own bodies He who loves his wife

Loves himself For no one ever hated his own flesh

But nourishes and cherishes it Just as Christ does the church Because we are members of his body

Oh therefore A man shall leave his father and mother And hold fast to his wife And the two shall become one flesh

Oh this mystery is profound And I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church However Let each one of you love his wife as himself

And let the wife see that she respects her husband Children Obey your parents

In the Lord For this is right Honor your father and mother

This is the first commandment with a promise That it may go well with you And that you may live long in the land

Fathers Do not provoke your children to anger But bring them up in the discipline

And instruction Of the Lord This is the reading of God's Holy inspired word

Would you bow with me once again as we ask That the Holy Spirit would illuminate our hearts and minds to this truth

We come before you and we ask once again That you work in our hearts

Lord our Our sinful flesh Has created

A distortion Of your word

And so when we come to your words here We often read it through the lens of that distortion

Forgive us Help us

Help us to see it clearly as it should be seen Give us wisdom

Discernment Give us insight Illuminate our hearts and minds to its truth

And let us not be hearers of the word only But doers of that word In Christ's name

Amen Well as I said a few weeks ago We got closer As we got closer to these verses

I really began to ponder On just how distorted

This particular design Has become Those within our culture

They openly mock what we just read What an outdated

Barbaric concept Surely Surely we've evolved from this

We're now smarter and wiser than that That old way

That old way of thinking We're a scientific people We understand things better than they did at that time

And after all We've seen the evidence that this design This structure is not good

That's how the world approaches it And here's the thing We expect that way of thinking from those

Within the world For they are of their father the devil As scripture says, right? So they're deceived

However My concern is that this deception Has greatly affected us

Within the church In ways that I'm not sure we're aware of at times And in preparation to preach

These texts that we just read I found that most of our brothers

Pastors and scholars and theologians They at least within biblical circles

They exegete this text well They see what the text says

And they teach what the text says Praise the Lord They see it They say, wives, submit to your husbands

Husbands, love your wives Children, obey your parents Fathers, discipline well

Oh, and by the way All of this is pointing to a greater reality The gospel

You see, most of them Most biblical pastors They teach this And they teach it well

But you see This is where I think the evil one's distortion Has come into play We within the church

Are often not railing against biblical submission Or male headship

At least at a surface level We have our own interpretations of it at times

But after all We see it here We just read the words So we know good and well

That we must obey it And praise God for it Yet It's only part of the picture of God's great design

These few verses are only part of the picture You see, here's the thing

God has reason for his good design God is a

God of order and reason and logic That's the only way we have logic, is it not? Because God is logical

And more often than not Those reasons are laid out for us In a very logical and reasonable way

And this is one of those areas And this is where the deception comes in Just as Satan tried to convince

Eve That God didn't really say not to eat of the tree He did that in Genesis 3 -1

He comes in and did God actually say You shall not eat of this tree of the garden? He poses the question to test

And what does she do? Thankfully in verse 2 Eve affirms that God Oh, God did say not to eat of this tree

And so what does he do? In the next couple of verses He changes the game plan

He said You will not surely die He says for God knows that when you eat of it

Your eyes will be opened And you will be like God Knowing good and evil What is

Satan doing here? He's not denying that God said it

He's questioning his motives And his purpose in saying it He's questioning his goodness and wisdom

He's questioning his design And now today

We in the church We see God's words here In places like our text in Ephesians And we like Eve affirm at some level

That yeah, God said it Without truly understanding it

Believing it Or loving it And truly obeying it

And that's because As I said a moment ago We are often missing Often missing the beauty, logic and reasoning

Behind it And this leaves our flesh susceptible

To distorting what God clearly said It's kind of like Telling a child

Not to ride their bike in that busy highway You give them parameters

And you say You can ride in the cul -de -sac You can ride in the driveway But do not go out into the busy street

And they ask As they always do Why? But then your answer is

Because I said so Which we all know Is a perfectly sufficient answer, right?

Kids in the room If mom and dad say Because I said so That's sufficient But here's the problem

But in their sinful rebellious minds You don't have sufficient reason

And they begin to think You just don't want them to have fun But when you show them the wisdom

Of the Of why you don't want them to play in that busy street The danger that comes with being in that busy street

And that your love for them Demands that you guard them from it Then that child is more likely

To see the beauty of that prohibition Is he not? Now some children

Still won't listen Right? Some of us are just that foolish

Pointing at myself as a child But there's a better chance of them understanding

The reason why not In the same way We are affirming that God said

Wives submit Husbands love Children obey All the while Not really truly knowing the why

Leaving many I think we have it listed on the screen here Leaving many

Some obeying it begrudgingly Leaving others to questioning it silently

Most misunderstanding it fundamentally And even those who are denouncing it rebelliously

These four categories Are all distortions of God's good design

And this is why today's message Feels very different than normal I feel uncomfortable up here this morning

Because I'm typically exegeting a text By this point But we the elders felt it incumbent upon us

To spend the next couple of weeks Laying the foundation of the why

Of God's design Before we jump head first into Ephesians 5 22

Hoping to guard you the saints From any distortion Of why and how to approach

This design from God Because as I said a moment ago

We Many pastors will preach this text I've listened to So many sermons so far

On these texts And I'm like yes and amen Like they're preaching them right Like they're good And as we think about it

We realize there's so many of us That our worldview has us standing over here

On this foundation And then we preach this text That is built on this foundation

And we just keep building the building On that foundation While everyone's stuck over here

Not seeing the beauty and intricacy Of the building But just watching the building rise From the other side

And having no context whatsoever For the why They should be in that building

And so we must guard you from that That's why the next couple of weeks will be this

When it comes to God's design for the family There are essentially three prominent positions

And these are foundations that I need to give you These are theological terms

That are used when understanding God's design for the family And these three prominent positions

Are egalitarianism Complementarianism And patriarchy

There is of course variation within all three But they are distinct nonetheless

And again I am having to give you A 30 ,000 foot flyover view this morning of it

I'm just introducing some concepts to you Let's look at egalitarianism

Egalitarianism This comes from a French word Egal which just means equal

And this phrase was popularized By a man by the name of John Locke During what was known as the

Enlightenment period This is where we get much of today's liberal thought

It kind of derived from this period of time And period of thought And at face value this word egalitarianism

Is really just referring to equality Racial equality

Social equality Even at certain levels Gender equality

And so at face value Yes we can affirm this

We affirm equality We affirm that every person is made in the image of God And worthy of equal value and worth

But at its core This word is really meant to erode away

At God's designed distinctions Between male and female

In theological circles This position of egalitarianism

Distorts passages such as Paul writing in Galatians 3 .28

They take the passage that says There is neither Jew nor Greek There is neither slave nor free

There is no male and female For you are all one in Christ Jesus And try to claim

That all distinctions between male and female Were simply a result of the fall

Claiming that Adam and Eve Were equal in role, position and duty

In the garden And that male headship Was nothing more than a consequence of sin

When God told Eve That your desire will be for your husband And he will rule over you

But now in their view That Christ has freed us from the bondage of sin Those distinctions are no more

Meaning men and women are equal In role, nature and position

In all spheres of life Including the church And the home

They believe women can be pastors, elders And they believe that women can be heads of households

And when it comes to the passages That clearly forbid those two things

They either denounce them fully They denounce the infallibility of Scripture altogether

Or they come up with some sloppy, exegetical gymnastics It's really wild to see how they come up with it

They're like, oh but this word over here This could have meant that And this word And they manipulate and twist it

To whatever they want it to be Or they simply say, oh that was Paul's opinion Not Jesus And so this is how they approach it

And we will be addressing many of these things Over the next few weeks, mind you In greater detail

I'm simply giving you, like I said A basic introduction of our terms Just know that our culture is fully egalitarian

There is absolutely no distinction In any sphere whatsoever To our culture

And here's the thing Any church, I want to give you a warning up front Any church that falls prey to this position

I'm going to make a bold statement What do you call them, Nathan bombs? Okay I'm going to make a bold statement

Any church that affirms this is not a church at all They have fundamentally disobeyed

King Jesus By disobeying his words Or manipulating his words Don't get me wrong

I believe there are Christians There are brothers and sisters Who have been deceived by this distortion

I've seen many I've loved many I've cared for I've ministered to many And they have most certainly not lost their salvation

Over believing something like egalitarianism But a church that holds to the teaching

Is by no means a true local ecclesia There may be true believers there

But a gathered group of true believers Does not make a church Not a local church

And anyone who teaches in those churches Is most certainly a false teacher Scripture is way too clear on this matter

Way too clear For anyone to make the excuse

That we can agree to disagree Now if you've been here for any amount of time

You know that we affirm There are most certainly areas in Scripture Where we can agree to disagree

There are many disagreements in this room And that's okay We love to be able to have those dialogues

And disagree on theological matters But this is not one of them Because of its clarity in Scripture And hopefully you will see that By the end of this series

The second position that you see here Complementarianism This term was popularized by John Piper and Wayne Grudem You probably know at least one of those

If not both of those names They used this phrase in their book

Rediscovering Biblical Manhood and Womanhood They did quite a bit of work on this

Throughout the 1980s And I think the book came out in the early 90s And this was of course a response

To a rapidly increasing bombardment Of egalitarianism within the church community

Establishing the biblical principle Of God's distinct roles For both male and female

Was their motive here While maintaining the fact that Men and women are most certainly

Equal image bearers of God With equal value, worth, and dignity

It was a great work I've benefited greatly from it I highly encourage you to look into it

But even though they affirm that They affirm that those two Have differing roles that are designed

To complement one another Hence the word complementarianism

You've got egalitarianism, equal Complementarianism, equal

But equal in this way Distinct roles that are complementary to each other

In God's good design So when scripture says In places like 1

Timothy 2 .12 I do not permit a woman to teach Or to exercise authority over a man

Of course, speaking of the context Within the church body Or texts like Ephesians 5 .22

that we just read Wives, submit to your own husbands as to the Lord Speaking of the context of the home

We understand them to be Forbidding anything but male headship

Within the church and within the home And that they are not lesser positions

But complementary positions Designed by God We believe this to be a

Biblically accurate summarization Of what scripture teaches us

About the distinction of roles At least within the church and the home

But you see, this is precisely What I was warning about earlier When I pointed to the fact that we see

That command of the roles between male and female Like a parent telling their child

Not to ride in the busy street With little to no context as to why

And leading many of us To obeying it begrudgingly Questioning it silently

Misunderstanding it fundamentally Or denouncing it rebelliously I thank the

Lord that most of you Are obeying it At least at some level

But if you are honest with yourselves There are times when you You are simply obeying

Because you know you have to Husbands If you're honest, you acknowledge

That there are many times You're not loving and leading In your home, right?

At least as you ought to And you're not Because your love for Christ You're not doing it because of your love for Christ And because you see the beauty

Of God's good design You're loving and leading begrudgingly

Well, God's word says I have to I have to love and I have to lead

I better pull myself up by my bootstraps and do it And it's leaving us, men

So many men that I counsel with To fall short In this area

You're certainly not loving well And you're definitely not leading well And you know it

And you wonder why I'm trying to obey it Wives, you're obeying outwardly

Praise God But inwardly you're calling your husband Every name in the book except for the good ones

Right? Oh, don't give me that holy look, wives I don't do that You know you feel that You're venting to your friends

Because you're not getting your way in the home All the while knowing that you have to obey that command

And so you are doing it begrudgingly Children You're obeying your parents outwardly

But in your heart you are full of rebellion It's just outward adherence

And Jesus had something to say about that in the Sermon on the Mount Did he not? You can pretend like you're obeying the law outwardly

But you break the law inwardly You've broken the whole law And we fall into this category where we say

Well, the word of God says it I gotta do it Some of you see

God's commands here And you silently question them We silently question them

Why do the men get to be in charge? They're morons You know what

I'm talking about We are We are often morons

It's almost as if we see this design in Ephesians 5 And we say, what did

God in creation? He flip a coin? He flip a coin and he's like Well, I guess the guys are in charge

Is that how it worked? We often think of it this way We're questioning, why?

I see that God said it But it sure doesn't seem right As if God is holding out on you

God's design isn't good Others in here may have fallen prey to the egalitarian worldview

By the way, every one of us have been affected by it If you think your worldview hasn't been phased by it

You have another thing coming Because we live in the world We live in the culture And our minds are being affected by everything you see, everything you read, everything you hear

And everything you say or is said to you You are affected by it Most certainly Some of you have fallen prey to it even more

And are now misunderstanding God's design fundamentally You see what it says

But it must not mean what it says Otherwise my whole way of thinking has to be thoroughly dismantled

Everything I know and every reality that I think Must come crumbling to the ground

In order for me to really align to what his word is saying And I'm sure there are those in here

Hopefully few, if any Who see these commands And are denouncing it rebelliously

You see this design You see the word of God And you just straight up rebel against it

Yeah I see that God says it But I'm not going to obey that Again you're saying

God's design is not good And God is not good It's rebellion

Here's the thing, some of us in here Some of you in here may not even be in Christ And that's why you fall prey to one of these four categories

Some of you don't even have the power to even comprehend what

I'm saying right now None of this makes any sense It seems like pure foolishness

And you just denounce it altogether Or you obey principles of it Thinking there's some wisdom, some old wisdom in there

But most of us in here Prayerfully are in Christ That's why we gather together

We are in Christ But we still fall prey to these distortions, do we not? I've been in almost all four of those categories at different times in my life

And this is why we believe that affirming complementarianism

As we just laid it out A theology of a distinction of roles Within male and female

Within the home and the church It has its place It is a good doctrine It is a good stance to have

And we here hold to complementarianism But it is insufficient to give us a holistic big picture understanding

Of why this distinction of roles is right and good It just tells us what they are

It doesn't tell us why Now again, of course, we could say

Well, we don't need the information God said it, that's good enough for me Absolutely That's true

And there are things in scripture We're just not clear But we see that he said it and we obey it Absolutely He doesn't owe us an explanation

However, in this case, scripture gives us a bigger, clearer picture Of the why

For a reason We see throughout the whole of scripture All the way from creation

Into glory And then beyond this third category And that is the doctrine of patriarchy

The evil one has done an excellent job At ruining that word, hasn't he?

Be honest, just the mention of that word feels gross, doesn't it? The world even likes to use it as a derogatory thing

Kind of like, I guess, in the Barbie movie Patriarchy and horses Right? They use it in a way that is gross

And this is one of those cases that you better define your terms Or your enemy will Well, our enemy sure did

He defined our terms for us We must redefine our terms And he used our sinful natures to distort and pervert this idea

Into something hideous And ugly Remember how

I said Satan wasn't able to destroy God's design So he was relegated to distort it

And this is a prime example This word, patriarchy, simply means father rule

At its core And when spoken about in theological terms It's really a doctrine of distinction of natures

A distinction of natures Whereas, as we said, complementarianism is a doctrine of distinction of roles

Because they have distinct natures And our sinful flesh has taken that concept

And we see it within the DNA of us And we have used it to oppress the other half of the

Imago Dei That's how the enemy has distorted it That's how we have distorted it

We've oppressed the other half The feminine half Of the image of God We've done so with a heavy -handed, loveless, selfish, vile version of father rule

We've seen exaggerated form of this in the Middle East Muslims treat women like cattle

Much of history has even done that They are second -hand citizens, if citizens at all

They are nothing more than property to be owned We see it in our day, in China, where they abort mostly young women, babies

Unborn women, because everyone wants a son Some in our culture and in our day wish we could go back to the 1950s version of patriarchy

We want the 1950s version of the family We see a great movement of that with the trad wife movement that you find online

Where we say, well this is what we want, we have to go back to the good old days When men were in charge, and women were at home, barefoot and pregnant in the kitchen

Making my coffee, and then I could knock her coffee cup over if it didn't taste good That's the version of patriarchy that we think of And you see how the enemy has taken that term from us, and from God's good design

And just annihilated it Turned it into something vile, ugly

Yes, in all of these we see that father rule, male headship It's so ingrained into the

DNA of all of creation by our creator That even though man suppresses the truth in his unrighteousness

We cannot escape our design, we can merely distort it, and distort it we have

Men have always ruled The problem is, was it good men or was it bad men?

Because as we're going to see in a moment There is a massive difference between a good father and a bad one

But it doesn't take away the fact that in the creation, the design, still stands

It's to the point where Satan has us right where he wants us

Knowing that God said it, but doubting his goodness in it Because here's the thing, we look around and we know

God said it We're complementarians, after all, there's a distinction of roles within the church and the home

But why? Turn with me to 1 Timothy 2 We're finally getting some exegesis

Thank the Lord That was my introduction 1

Timothy chapter 2 I referenced this passage earlier But I want us to see this idea of male headship ingrained into all of creation

Most of you know this letter is what's called a pastoral epistle This is the

Apostle Paul writing to one of his protégés, Timothy, who is establishing churches And there in 1

Timothy 2, in verse 11, the passage we read a moment ago Let a woman learn quietly with all submissiveness

I do not permit a woman to teach or to exercise authority over a man Rather, she is to remain quiet The world will see that and read that and go, oh, how barbaric

And some will read it within the church and excuse it away by saying, well, that was for that time period

Or that was a particular culture that Timothy was in and Paul was having him work with that particular culture

However, there's a massive glaring problem with that theory Massive Paul goes on It's not just those two verses isolated

Paul goes on, and what does he do? He grounds it in the patriarchal nature of creation

Something binding on all generations, cultures, and time Look at verse 13

Four What's the four there for? Women are not to teach and have authority over men

Four, because Adam was formed first Then Eve Stop there for a second

Have you ever wondered why God didn't just create Eve at the same time as Adam?

Why did he not just create them at the same time? Keep your finger there in 1

Timothy We're going to go back to that text here in a second Look over with me at Genesis 2 .15

Let's look at what Paul is referring to here This is the text we read as our scripture reading this morning

I wanted to get it into your brains before we jumped into it As a reminder Genesis 2 .15

Remember, keep your fingers back there in 1 Timothy We're going to go back But look with me there in verse 15

It says, the Lord God took the man Who's the man?

Adam, right? He took the man that he had created And he put him in the Garden of Eden to do what?

To work it and keep it What's his job? To work the garden and keep the garden

It's his responsibility He is tasked with the care of the garden

This, essentially, temple where God dwells with his people He is tasked with the care of it

Look down at verse 18 now Then the Lord God said

It is not good that the man should be alone I will make a helper fit for him

Now see, as we see in verse 19 On through verse 20

That he had brought every beast of the field to him Look at the second part of verse 19

Beast of the field and every bird of the heavens And he brought them to the man

God brought every created animal to the man To see what he,

Adam, would call them Now, this is all ingrained in Hebrew literature, of course

But, when we see this design laid out by God What is

God declaring by the fact that he's bringing every animal to him To see what he would call them

Adam gets to name the animals God himself gave Adam the position to name all living creatures

There's an authority there, is there not? There's a position of headship

And it says, whatever the man, Adam, called every living creature That was its name

He got to name them The man gave names to all livestock And to the birds of the heavens

And to every beast of the field He rules over creation God has given him authority from himself to Adam to rule the creation

He gets to name what every creature is called Look what it says next

But for Adam there was not found And again, he uses this phrase, a helper fit for him

None of the rest of creation was equipped to help

Adam carry out his duty of ruling the garden and the world Nothing was equipped to do that It wasn't fit for him

Look at verse 21 So, the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall upon the man

And while he slept, took one of his ribs and closed up its place with flesh

And the rib that the Lord God had taken from the man, he made into a woman

And brought her to the man Notice he brought her to the man

He wakes Adam up And just like he had brought all created things to the man

He brings woman to the man And we have it written as woman here

But if you look on, you realize she doesn't yet have a name God did not give her a name

Look at verse 23 Then the man said Here's Eve, brought before him

And we're going to talk about this text later on here in the next couple of weeks And I really want to dive into the intricacy of this poem that Adam says

It's beautiful But you can see this passion in Adam as he goes He goes, at last

All of those creatures, they were beautiful They were wonderful They were great They were amazing creations by the creator

That I oversee and reign over and get to name Oh, but this, this at last is bone of my bones

And flesh of my flesh She shall be called woman He named her

Because she was taken out of man God created

Adam first This was not God reacting to Adam's loneliness God did not create

Adam and go Man, I'm kind of missing something here Woman It didn't work like that God had planned on creating

Eve before he had even The foundations of the world were created He had planned on creating

Eve from eternity past He already had a game plan This didn't catch

God off guard So why wait? Why wait?

Because God, the ultimate patriarch Was establishing male headship

Father rule at the very onset of creation It was ingrained into his good creation and design

It was intentional, it was purposeful And it was very, very good Now look back with me at 1

Timothy 2 I told you to keep your fingers there 1

Timothy 2, 14 He'd already said the woman was deceived, right?

Or no, he hasn't said that yet I'm about to read that Verse 14, he says And Adam was not deceived

For Adam was created first, then Eve And Adam was not deceived But the woman was deceived

And became a transgressor Paul's not shifting blame here like Adam did

When he got caught Remember what Adam did? God's looking at him, he goes Hey, it was the woman that you gave me

She did it But that's not what Paul's doing here Paul is pointing to the fact that She should have never been in that role in the first place

She wasn't designed for it She was vulnerable to deception

And Adam, being in charge, should have guarded her from it And because he did not do so Paul said in Romans 5, verse 12

He says Therefore, just as sin came into the world Through one man Through one man?

Wasn't it Adam and Eve? Sin entered the world through one man And death through sin

And so death spread to all men Because all sinned Why not through Eve?

She ate first Paul just said that to Timothy Why not

Eve? Why one man? Because he was the representative of all men

He was the patriarch Paul affirms this truth in 1

Corinthians again, verse 15, 22 He says For as in Adam, all die

Not Eve Adam Now are we born from Eve?

Yes But it's the seed of Adam that is passed down The sin The sin of the father

Here's the thing Adam Adam was a poor patriarch He did not uphold

God's good design that he was tasked to care for Just like all the other patriarchs since It doesn't change the fact that we lead and represent those that are tasked under our care

It just means that we usually do a poor job of it As we've said, the world already knows male headship is inevitable

It was designed into the DNA of all of creation But they also know it doesn't work

Didn't think you were going to hear me say that, did you? They also know it doesn't work

Just like it didn't work in the garden Oh, but that's where the true patriarch,

God the Father Sent his own son I read the beginning of 1

Corinthians 15, 22 Where Paul says, as for in Adam, all die But he goes on, he says, so also in Christ Shall all be made alive

Christ, the true and better Adam As we sang this morning in that one verse of the song

The true and better Adam Performed the greatest act of headship ever known

And here, only here, is where we find hope and beauty in patriarchy

Only in Christ Because for those of us who have tasted of his goodness

Are born a new creation Who are brought into union with him

And indwelled by the Holy Spirit that's giving us the power To obey God's precepts and design and law

We can finally see a true example of patriarchy Not some macho bravado, man rules the world

No girls allowed Clint Eastwood, John Wayne, cowboy or muscle man imitation

It's all a facade It all falls short Clint Eastwood might be able to win at the end of the movie

But he most certainly doesn't lead well in life You see how we've distorted

God's good design? Of course it's an ugly word now But no, we're not left with the imitation

The failure of father rule and male headship No, we are given the example of humility

Gentleness, lowliness, sacrifice, pain bearing, flat footed boldness

As our passage in Ephesians 5

Verse 25 says husbands love your wives How? How are you to love your wives?

You just pull yourself up by your bootstraps and love your wife? No, we have an example

He says as Love your wives Don't just come up with an idea of how to love your wife

Don't love your wife by being macho Don't love your wife by ruling with a heavy fist

Don't love your wife by just being neutral and passive And letting her have whatever she wants and do whatever she wants

No, he says as Christ loved the church And what did he do? Gave himself up for her

That's our example He laid down his life for her He condescended from his rightful throne for her

He comforts her He intercedes for her This is biblical patriarchy

This is the doctrine of patriarchy God's design is not arbitrary It's not optional

And it's not to be distorted If you're not in Christ You will always be subjected to the ugly perverted imitation

It's the only thing you have to offer Oh, but for those who are in Christ For those of us in Christ His precepts are sweet, are they not?

His designs are sweet And they're good and they're right And therefore you're flourishing

And contentment in Him You want to have a family

That functions the way God designed your family to function? It must only and can only function under His design

And when you see the beauty of it Oh, you reap the benefit

I can't tell you how many marriages I see crumble

As I counsel people that come in Or I watch others that are being counseled come in And basically they show up at your desk

And they have broken glass in their hands And they just lay out the broken glass and go Can you fix it?

And you're like, well, it's kind of almost too late And then you start asking them

How did it get so broken? And their life has been either

A total disregard of God's design in the home The husband is passive The wife just makes all the decisions and rules

Or the husband is a heavy -handed tyrant And has beaten his wife into submission

And it's decimating to the children And their relationship in the family

It's godless and it's a distortion Oh, but when families come in and you see

Oh man, I love God's design And the wife goes Oh, I know

I'm not lesser than Him I am perfectly equal in every way of value with Him I am an image -bearer of God And we are one flesh

And He is the father rule in the home He is the patriarch He is the one that leads and cares

And lays down His life for me And a husband that looks and says My wife is smarter than I am

She's better than I am in every single way But she shows the love of Christ And submitting to me?

I'm an idiot! How is she submitting to me? And it makes me want to be the man that God's called me to be even more

And you see that kind of marriage? Oh, that's God's design and you flourish and you love it And it can only be had

Not through external adherence It can only be had first and foremost in Christ Being made a new creation

And then in that seeing the beauty of His design And loving it

And loving the law of God Do not think of this as oppressive

As if God is holding out on you His ways are higher His ways are good

Walk in them and be blessed In light of that truth Let's prepare our hearts to go to the table

As we outwardly in an expression of worship Express to each other and to our

God That I still affirm I am in Christ I am living for Christ I am walking with Christ He has paid for my sin

And I seek to confess And I seek to repent and lay that before the cross

But I also walk in boldness As you take part of the wine and the bread

That represents His blood and His body That was given for you But you also remember declaring it to each other

While we do it together and it's a meal As you come up to this table

And you take those elements Your brothers and sisters Are taking you at your word

That I am walking with the Lord I am confessing my sins

And I am seeking to align my life in obedience to my Savior And when you partake of those elements

While your heart is harboring unrepentant sin I don't mean sin that you just aren't aware of We all have those all the time

I mean you know it's sin And you refuse to lay it at the foot of the cross You are lying to your brothers and sisters

And that's why Paul said some of you are sick And some of you have even died For coming to this table in an unworthy manner

It's a serious matter So let's now bow our heads

Let's search our hearts Let's lay any sin at the foot of the cross

If you need to make something right with your spouse Do it before you come to the table

If you are holding something over your spouse's head And you are not living for your spouse as you ought to Or seeking to at least

Then you need to go and repent And you need to lay it Confess your sins one to another And you need to make it right before you come to this table

If you have something against your brother or sister in this room Make it right before you come to this table

This is not penance But if we have open unrepentant sin in our lives

We want to take this very serious Let's pray Lord thank you for your good design

Thank you for your graciousness And our imperfect obedience to that good design

Lord thank you for your grace and mercy In our direct disobedience to your good design

And Father we as a people We want to be a people of your word We want to be a people that love your truth

We want to be a people that are doers of the word Not hearers only God And so as we prepare to come to this ordinance

This table of the wine and the bread Representing the glorious blood and body of our

Savior Jesus Christ Father we ask that you would search our hearts Lord if there are husbands in this room today

Who have not been loving and leading their wife And they're not even trying to put the pieces in place to do so God help them to repent

Help them to confess to their wives and other men To help keep them accountable God if there are wives in here who have refused

To submit to their husbands in a Christ honoring way God cause them to do the same

To go to their husbands and repent Repent before you first and foremost But confess to other sisters who can keep them accountable

God I pray for those in here who are not yet married God I pray that you mold their hearts and minds

And prepare them so that they are better prepared Than even we were That they would not just hear sermons like today

And go well that's not for me, not at the moment But that they would diligently take notes And say

I must grow and learn what God's design is But God we ask that at this table

Lord As we come and we prepare for this Lord search our hearts and minds That we would lay sin before you

But that we would come boldly And worship and celebration Of the goodness of Christ That has paid for us and brought us into righteousness