Spoof: David Hogg's Attorney-- Liberal Lyle
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Ladies and gentlemen, we present a very special guest: Liberal Lyle. Liberal Lyle can help you with all of your blind anger and Social Justice Warrior needs. Liberal Lyle will help you get your message across all of the popular liberal media platforms from Huffington Post, MSNBC, CNN, and Buzzfeed.
Call Liberal Lyle today and join the ranks of David Hogg and other liberal propagandists who want to undo the Constitution and completely restructure the West.
Get more content at http://apologiastudios.com.
- 00:00
- Have you been part of a tragedy this past year? If so, then I can help. I'm Liberal Lyle, and I'm here to help you get back.
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- Did you mean give back? Nope, I meant get back. In the past, when tragedy struck, people would usually turn to Jesus and get a heart change, but not anymore.
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- No doubt you're aware of my clients, David Hogg and Emma Gonzalez. They were both in the
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- Parkland shooting, and instead of letting them grieve or find logical ways to get rid of a mass shooting, they called me, and I put them on the fast track to abandon an entire amendment.
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- I can do the same for you because I believe in prostitution. Did you mean prosecution?
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- Nope, I meant prostitution. I'll exploit you faster than a conservative can say unconstitutional.
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- I can get you on every liberal news channel from MSNBC to CNN to the
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- Young Turks. I can get you on BuzzFeed, and I can get you on Real Time with Bill Maher. And that's not all,
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- I'll get you to speak at every anti -gun rally that exists. But don't worry, you'll be surrounded by your own personal security force that carries all sorts of guns.
- 01:09
- They'll protect you physically, but not emotionally. But Liberal Lyle, could you help me even if I bully the shooter?
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- Absolutely! That's what Emma Gonzalez did, and even that didn't prevent America from feeling bad for her.
- 01:22
- See, I took a page right out of American history books, literally. I read a current history book from America's public schools, and I did the exact same thing that they did.
- 01:32
- I blatantly told whatever story I wanted with no concern for the truth. And I'll do it all for you completely free.
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- Did you mean for free? Nope, I meant fee. While you think you're making a change,
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- I'm profiting off my own agenda and helping other organizations do the same. I get money under the table, and you get to be the face of a flawed movement.
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- It's a win -win, so don't delay. Feed your blind anger by calling Liberal Lyle today at 1 -800 -WE -ABUSE.
- 02:03
- That's 1 -800 -WE -ABUSE. And if you call today, I'll make you a spokesperson for Planned Parenthood.
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- Next week with Jeff Durbin. The late night show with the unpopular opinion.