Divorce is a Sin

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I want to invite you to take out your Bibles, turn with me to Matthew chapter 5, and we're going to be looking at verses 31 and 32.
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By way of introduction this morning, I want to just sort of remind everyone where we have been so that we understand why we're looking at this particular text this morning.
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We've been studying the Sermon on the Mount, which is the first major discourse in the Gospel of Matthew, and it is the major discourse of Jesus' teaching on ethics, morals, how a person who is called to faith is supposed to live and manage their lives.
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Last week, we examined a very difficult moral topic.
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We dealt with the topic of lust and how it relates to the issue of adultery.
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Jesus said, you have heard it said that you should not commit adultery, but I say unto you, every man who looks with lustful intent has already committed adultery in his heart.
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I will tell you, I put it on the sermon audio.
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It has jumped well past my recent sermons as far as downloads.
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This is a subject people are concerned about.
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This is a subject people, they want to know the answers because it's an issue that so many people deal with.
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The issue of lust, the issue of sexual sin is a major, major issue.
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And Jesus is plain on it.
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Jesus does not hide what He's talking about.
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He doesn't veil His words.
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He simply says it straight out as it is.
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We also noted last week when we were talking about the sin of lust, we said this is the downfall of many people.
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It's a downfall of many men in particular, old and young, weak and powerful, famous and obscure.
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Many men have perpetrated sexual sins and as a result have fallen very publicly as a result.
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Sexual sin is a very persuasive and a very dangerous issue.
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Well, this week I say all that because this week we are continuing.
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We study verse by verse and we're continuing on.
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And we're going to look at the next two verses in the Sermon on the Mount, which follow up on the subject of lust and adultery.
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Jesus doesn't stop talking about those things, but instead He moves on to another evolution in the topic, just moving on in this subject.
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And while some might say it's a different issue, I believe that these verses actually are compounding the issue of what we talked about before.
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Jesus has just warned that adultery and lust are sins.
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We knew adultery was a sin, but lust also is a sin.
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Sins that devastate lives, damage the institution of marriage and lead to the destruction of the family.
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So it's very natural that after that He would begin to talk about divorce.
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And that's where we're moving to today, because that's the next step.
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That's the issue that follows the preceding one.
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So this morning we're going to study His words.
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We're going to seek to see how in many ways the Church has abandoned Jesus' teaching on this subject.
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The Church in large and by in large has abandoned what Christ has said and has replaced it with a secular ethic on this issue.
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We have replaced the Christian ethic regarding marriage and divorce with a very worldly, a very fleshly, a very secular ethic.
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And it has so influenced the Church that many people don't even address it as sin anymore.
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So that's what we're going to talk about today.
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Let's stand for the reading of God's word.
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Give it its due honor and reverence.
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Matthew chapter 5, verse 31 and verse 32.
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We will be reading and it says, It was also said, whoever divorces his wife, let him give her a certificate of divorce.
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But I say to you that everyone who divorces his wife except on the ground of sexual immorality makes her commit adultery and whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery.
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Our Father and our God, Lord, we come to you in Christ's name, pleading for the power of the Holy Spirit this morning on this very powerful and important subject.
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I pray, as I always pray, Lord, that you would keep me from error, as I am certainly capable of preaching error.
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I pray that you would keep me in line with what the word says.
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I pray that you would also open the hearts of your people to hear the word and thus apply it to their lives.
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Help us to come to this text, Lord, not with our preconceived ideas of what ought be and what ought not be.
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But rather, Lord, come to the text of Scripture and let Christ speak.
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Let the word speak for itself and let it be the truth.
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And let that permeate all of our hearts and let it be what guides our ethic and our understanding of marriage.
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We thank you, we praise you for all that you have done and are going to do in this time.
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In Christ's name, Amen.
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In 1960, in the United States, 70% of all adults were married.
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Today, that number has dropped considerably and it is just over half of all adults are married.
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As a result, eight times as many children are now born out of wedlock as compared to what was happening in the 1960s.
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In the 60s, two thirds of all young adults in their 20s were married.
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Now, only 26% of those in their 20s are married.
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Time Magazine, not a great source for theology, mind you, but sometimes can do good for polls and things like that.
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Time Magazine reports that 40% of Americans polled believe that marriage has become obsolete.
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The very concept and idea of marriage is obsolete.
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The article is quoted as saying this, and I quote, Neither men nor women need to be married to have sex or companionship or professional success or respect or even children.
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End quote.
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It's not necessary anymore.
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It's not important anymore.
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Who cares? As a result, many people are no longer cohabitating prior to marriage.
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But instead, now many people are cohabitating instead of marriage.
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It's not something that we're not living together before we get married.
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We're just not getting married.
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This stands to reason, then, since the New York Times reported that from 1996 to 2012, the number of cohabiting U.S.
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couples jumped 170% from around 3 million, 2.9, up to 7.8 million people.
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These statistics were mentioned recently by Al Mohler of Southern Seminary and his address regarding the issue of marriage and how the overall landscape and understanding of marriage in our nation has changed.
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The ethic has changed.
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The very understanding of what it means to be a family and what it means to have a family has become seriously distorted and very biblical.
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And furthermore, even those who do choose to get married are often not seeing it as a permanent institution.
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Determining the actual divorce rate is very difficult.
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If you look at the CDC, they'll tell you that the divorce rate is around 50%.
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But it's really a hard statistic to tell because they don't know if it's 50% of people getting married.
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What they do is they say, well, 6% of people were married this year and 3% of people were divorced this year.
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But very unlikely is it the same group that's getting married that's getting divorced.
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But when they're finding the 50%, that's how they do it.
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So it's a little bit of a skewed statistic.
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But still, even if the divorce rate was higher or lower than 50%, even if it were a little bit higher or a little bit lower, it's easy to assess just on an experiential level that the attitude towards marriage and divorce in America has taken a radical turn in the last half century.
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And what has happened is that now many people are practicing divorcing.
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They practice divorcing.
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What do you mean by that? Well, in their youth, in their young adult life, they enter into multiple intimate relationships.
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They experience multiple emotional, physical connections with multiple people over a very short period of time in their emotional developmental years.
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And as a result, they don't see those intimate relationships as something worth developing and maturing, but rather they're something that as soon as they become difficult, they jettison them.
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And I call that divorce practice.
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That's all it is.
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It's training for divorce.
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People ask me all the time, How old does your daughter have to be before you allow her to date? And they look at me like I have three heads when I say never.
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Dating is not a necessity.
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Dating means this in secular culture.
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I'll define dating.
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I allow my daughters to go out into the world and share in an experience intimate relationships without any supervision or accountability.
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It ain't happening.
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We do not plan to allow that as a family.
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Thus, when you ask me, when are you going to allow it? I say never.
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My goal.
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I know this is getting a little off topic, but there are fathers in the room.
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I want to share with you something.
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And hopefully this might encourage you, especially those with daughters.
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I just had another daughter last year.
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A little nervous.
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I'm going through it.
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I have a daughter about to turn 16, about to get her first car.
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So I'm fixing to invest in mattresses and tires and just line the roads.
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But my goal and with my daughter, my older daughter, we've discussed this.
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My younger daughter, obviously, she doesn't understand English yet.
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So we have not discussed this.
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But with my younger daughter, we have discussed that it is my role in her life to aid her in developing healthy relationships.
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That's my job.
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In particular, the relationship with the man who she will one day marry.
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They don't get to have unfettered alone time.
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They don't get to go out and be alone.
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Why in the world would I allow that opportunity for indiscretion? They don't get to practice being married.
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To practice intimacy.
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To practice divorce when things don't work out.
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Instead, their relationship will grow within a system of courtship which will involve more than just, Hey, take my daughter out and have her back by 10.
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I'm sorry.
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Pastor, you live in a dream world.
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Well, I ain't woke up yet.
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Some people think, well, what you got to do, Pastor, is when the boy comes over to pick up your daughter, sit there and clean your gun.
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It might make him nervous.
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There's song about that.
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You got to scare the young man.
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Or don't let your daughter out of the house until she's 30.
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That's not it.
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I'm not interested in scaring some young man.
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I don't think I'm going to have to try.
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No, I'm not interested in scaring some young man.
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What I'm interested in for my daughter is to teach her that marriage and the relationship of marriage is about responsibilities, difficulties and goals.
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And that she and I are looking for her someone.
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I'm not praying that he never shows up.
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I'm praying that the right man shows up.
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I want her to be in a good and godly relationship with a young man who will take care of her.
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And I pray that the way that I take care of her mother becomes an example to her for what to look for.
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That's what I want.
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We don't want to keep her from a relationship.
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We want her to be in the absolute best possible relationship she can be in.
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So we want to help.
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We want to participate in this.
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Never would I separate myself from that.
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I want to be involved in health and love and encourage and nurture and demonstrate to her what she should expect.
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The problem is marriage is not held in high esteem anymore in our land.
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And for many people, it's not for life anymore.
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And they're not taught that from birth.
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That marriage is for life.
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Divorce is rampant.
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People cohabitate instead of marrying.
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And some are even trying to radically alter the definition of marriage.
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But beloved, something important as we begin to look at the text, something important to remember is that marital infidelity is not new.
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The problem with people not honoring their marriage vows didn't just start in the 80s or in the 70s or even in the last century.
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There's a reason why in the Ten Commandments, you get around number seven and the commandment is very simple.
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Do not commit adultery.
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This issue has been around for a while.
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As a result, it makes sense that Jesus, when he's giving the Sermon on the Mount, what I consider to be the most powerful demonstration of the ethos of the Christian, the ethic of the Christian.
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What is the Christian expected to do? Not only not murder, but not hate and not use foul language against others and language of hatred.
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Not only is a Christian not supposed to commit adultery, he's not supposed to lust.
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Not only it's not about oaths, it's about always telling the truth.
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This is the Christian ethic.
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Well, here's the Christian ethic on divorce.
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Jesus is talking to us.
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He talks about the issue of marriage as a foundational building block and a valuable microcosm of the visible church.
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And Jesus is addressing a misunderstanding here.
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Let's look back at our text.
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Verse 31.
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It was also said, whoever divorces his wife, let him give a certificate of divorce.
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Now, very quickly, I think the word also there is very important.
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I'm not sure how it's translated in all translations.
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I didn't have a chance to look at every single different one.
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But the word also there in my mind is connecting it to what came before.
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He just talked about lust.
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He just talked about adultery.
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Now he's saying it is also said this is the extension of this and he's connecting it to what came before.
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He said it's also said whoever divorces wife, let him give her a certificate of divorce.
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Now, let's look at what he's quoting here.
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Jesus is quoting, at least he's paraphrasing an Old Testament principle.
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Let's go back to Deuteronomy 24.
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Deuteronomy 24 is where Christ is alluding to here.
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And in verse 1 of Deuteronomy 24.
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I'll give you a second, I hear Bible pages turn.
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I'll give you a second to get there.
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Those of you with iPhones, you're right there.
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The iBible.
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Deuteronomy 24 verse 1.
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When a man takes a wife and marries her, if then she finds no favor in his eyes, because he has found some indecency in her, and he writes her a certificate of divorce and puts it in her hand and sends her out of his house, and she departs out of his house.
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And if she goes and becomes another man's wife, and the latter man hates her and writes her a certificate of divorce and puts it in her hand and sends her out of his house.
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And if the latter man dies, who took her to be his wife, then her former husband who sent her away may not take her again to be his wife after she has been defiled, for that is an abomination before the Lord.
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And you shall not bring sin upon the land that the Lord your God is giving you for an inheritance.
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That's the passage that Jesus is referring to.
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It mentions the certificate of divorce.
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But you'll notice, there's a lot in that.
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It's not just about giving a certificate of divorce.
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It's more about who she can remarry and who she can get married to.
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The certificate of divorce is set in passing.
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In fact, later in Matthew 19, which we're going to get to in a minute, the Pharisees will say to Jesus, why did Moses command us to give us a certificate of divorce? If you look at Deuteronomy 24, there's no command to give this certificate.
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The command is how the remarriage is supposed to take place, not the command of the divorce.
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There is no command to divorce in that text.
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It says it's what is happening.
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It speaks of it in passing as something that has occurred, but there's no command.
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But this passage was greatly debated among the people of Jesus's time.
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There were two famous rabbis, and both of them were giving their perspective on the issue of marriage and divorce.
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The first was a man named Hillel.
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Hillel was a rabbi who made allowances for divorce in any case, even the most slight of cases.
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He taught that a man could divorce a woman for just about any reason, even if her cooking wasn't good.
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That's literally, even if her cooking wasn't good, that qualifies as having found some indecency in her from Deuteronomy 24.
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That qualifies.
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So Hillel would be what you would call the liberal rabbi.
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He's offering up this liberal interpretation.
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Hey, anybody who wants a divorce can get a divorce.
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That's it.
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That's done.
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Then there was Shammai, the other rabbi.
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The two were sort of opposing one another.
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Shammai was a rabbi who allowed divorce, but only under egregious causes, only egregious grounds.
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He took a very hard line against the flippant attitude of divorce from the Hillelian school.
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He said, the Hillelians, they're the liberals.
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You have the Shammaians, they are the conservatives, if you will.
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So Jesus is addressing this issue.
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And he's seeking to clear up an interpretation of the law which had been miscommunicated by the Jewish leadership.
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Both schools of thinking believe that divorce was in accordance with the law of God in some respect.
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That both of them believe that this command of giving a certificate was part of the law.
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But as I've already noted, there is no command to give the certificate.
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It simply says it's something that was done.
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The primary focus of Deuteronomy is not the divorce, as I've said, but it is the remarriage situation.
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Yet the debate continued on.
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The debate went on and on.
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So Jesus addresses it in the Sermon on the Mount.
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Now, what he says in the Sermon on the Mount is relatively short.
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But I say to you that everyone who divorces his wife, except on the grounds of sexual immorality, the Greek word there is pornea, by the way.
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It is not the same word as adultery used above, which is in the issue of lust and adultery.
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That's moikos, this is pornea.
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It is a little bit different.
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And he says it makes her commit adultery.
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That is moikos.
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And whoever marries her, marries a divorced woman, commits adultery.
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Again, moikos is used there.
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So we see what Jesus is answering.
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But for a more expanded version of what Jesus is saying, it's important, again, if we're going to interpret Scripture, we have to compare Scripture with Scripture.
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So let's go to Matthew 19 and let's look at the full expression of what Jesus is saying.
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So turn with me to Matthew chapter 19 and verse 3.
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Verse 3 of Matthew 19 says this.
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And Pharisees came up to him and tested him, asking, Is it lawful to divorce one's wife for any cause? Now, before we go to verse 4, let's just very quickly address the question.
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There's two ways to look at this.
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They could be asking, is there any reason for a divorce? Or they could be asking, can we divorce for any reason? You might say, that sounds like the same thing.
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Well, it's really not.
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They're saying, is there any possible reason someone could get a divorce? Is there anywhere in the law of God that allows for this? That could be one way.
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Or they're saying, does anything allow for this? So they're asking the question of Hillel and Shema.
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Hillel says anything, even bad food, is worthy of a divorce.
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Shema says, no, it's only the most egregious things.
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So that's the question.
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And again, they're saying any cause.
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Verse 4, he answered, Have you not read that he who created them from the beginning made them male and female and said, therefore, a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.
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So they are no longer two, but one flesh.
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What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate.
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They said to him, why did Moses command one to give a certificate of divorce and to send her away? He said to them, because of your hardness of heart, Moses allowed.
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Notice Jesus corrects.
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They said command.
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He said, no, he allowed it.
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He allowed you to divorce your wives.
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But from the beginning, it was not so.
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And I say to you, whoever divorces his wife except for sexual immorality and marries another commits adultery.
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Now, something important.
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Jesus didn't change anything he said in the Sermon on the Mount.
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That's important.
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This is simply an expansion of what he has already said.
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And the important thing for us to note here in Matthew 19 is that Jesus does not just give the teaching opposing divorce, but he's also giving a positive case for marriage.
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I heard a person recently say this, a liberal blogger, whatever blogger.
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Is that a person? Okay.
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A liberal blogger writing on the subject of marriage from the perspective of the gay rights movement and the desire to make homosexual marriage legal.
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And she said, I hear Christians all the time saying that the Bible gives a traditional view of marriage.
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But that's not true.
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The Bible doesn't give a standard for marriage.
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There's all kinds of different marriage displayed in the Bible, including polygamy and incest and all kinds of other things.
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And to look for the Bible as a standard is wrong.
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That's what this lady said.
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Well, she's wrong.
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She's absolutely wrong.
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She believes that just because the Bible talks about polygamy, just because the Bible talks about different types of marriage, that the Bible is endorsing it.
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That is not true.
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The Bible only endorses one type of marriage.
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The Bible only endorses marriage in one way.
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And it has not undergone change since God created it this way.
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It was the very beginning that God created it one way.
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He created Adam.
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He created Eve.
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He did not create any spares in case Eve didn't work out.
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Polygamy, adultery, divorce.
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All of these are a result of the fall.
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They are not part of the created mandate for marriage.
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And that's what Christ says here.
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He said in God's plan of creation, marriage was designed this way.
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God created a man.
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He created a woman.
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He created them for one purpose.
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And that was that that marriage would be for life.
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The two shall become one flesh.
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That's God's creationary design for marriage.
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That two people become one flesh.
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And then Jesus says in verse 6 something very powerful, something that I imagine you've all heard in every marriage ceremony that you've ever been to.
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I know I say it in every one that I ever perform.
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He said in verse 6, What therefore God has joined together, let not man.
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The King James would say put asunder, but in a more modern vernacular, let not man separate.
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What God has brought together, let not man separate.
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And the Jews challenged that.
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They didn't like that.
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And they said, but what about Moses? He allowed for us to have divorces.
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Moses told us, he commanded us to give a certificate of divorce.
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What they're missing in that response, in that attempted rebuttal to the words of Christ.
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What they're missing is that marriage is supposed to be the most important union in the world.
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One that no one should ever seek to separate.
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The Bible teaches us that God hates divorce.
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Malachi chapter 2 and verse 16.
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Somebody says, I don't know God hated anything.
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He hates divorce.
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It says it in the Scriptures.
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Why does he hate it? It destroys hearts.
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It destroys lives.
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It destroys families.
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It destroys trust.
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Why do you think he hates it? Do we really have to spend a whole lot of time trying to figure out why it's so bad? Somebody says, well, if it's so bad and God hates it, why does he allow it? Well, I could argue, well, God allows murder too.
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He allows thievery and all kinds of other things.
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That doesn't make those right.
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But let's move past that.
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Because Jesus gives us a succinct answer.
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If God hates it, why does he allow it? That's what the Pharisees asked.
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Well, why is this command there in the law of Moses? And Jesus said, because you're sinners.
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That's what he said.
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He says, because you're sinners.
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That's why it ever came in the picture.
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It was not the reason it was created.
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It was not the purpose for which God created men and women to be together.
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It's not the way it was supposed to be.
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But because of sin and the hardness of men's heart, there was an allowance for this thing.
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This abomination to come in.
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It came in as a result of sin.
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Divorce is allowed in the decree of God.
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But divorce is not aligned with the design of God.
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God has allowed divorce within his decree in the same way that he allows us other types of sin in his decree.
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In the end, he will have a purpose for all of it.
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To glorify himself in the judgment of the wicked and the redeeming of the saints.
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That's the goal of all of this.
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But remember Jesus' words.
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He says, from the beginning it was not so.
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According to Christ, the reason for the allowance of divorce is because man has a sinful and depraved nature.
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Jesus' point is simple.
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All divorce, no matter what the circumstances, is deplorable in God's sight.
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It's not the purpose for which marriage was created.
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It was not created to ever have an ending point.
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There's not supposed to be an expiration date on marriage certificates.
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It's not supposed to be that way.
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All divorce begins in the sinful heart of man.
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It does not begin in the creative design of God.
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That's Jesus' point.
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It's very simple.
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Easily articulated.
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But that's his point.
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Now, here comes the big question.
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It's the one that perhaps you're on the edge of your seat wondering what I'm going to say.
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Maybe not.
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Maybe you've already turned me off because you don't want to hear this.
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But listen up, if that's you.
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Because everybody needs to hear this.
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Because the next question is the big question.
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Well, is divorce ever justifiable in regard to the Christian ethic? In regard to Christ's teachings? Is divorce ever justifiable from a Christian perspective? Well, beloved, I want to share with you that just as in the days of Jesus, there were two schools of thought.
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There was the Hillelian and the Shemaian school of thought.
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Just as in the days of Christ, we too today have different schools of thought on this issue.
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There are some in what is called the permanence position, who say that marriage is never justifiable for any reason at all.
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I'm sorry, divorce.
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Excuse me.
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Divorce is never justifiable for any reason at all.
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It's like Adam and I were talking earlier this morning.
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Marriage is the number one cause of all divorce.
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It has to happen first.
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So divorce is never justifiable.
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That's the permanence position.
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There is the, what we would call the liberal perspective still for today, and that's that divorce is justifiable in every conceivable situation for any reason.
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And then there is the position that divorce can be justifiable if certain parameters are met.
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And the two parameters that are often brought up are these.
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Number one, sexual immorality, because Jesus said it.
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It's clear that Jesus does say, except on the grounds of sexual immorality.
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And he adds that exception in regard to divorce.
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Now, those on the permanency position hold to the view that that particular type of sin that Jesus was referring to was talking about a very narrowly specific type of incest which occurred at the early part of the first century that Jesus would have been dealing with at that particular time in history, that he wasn't saying all sexual sin, but that one specific type that Jesus was dealing with then, a type of incestuous marriage which would have nullified the divorce, or nullified the marriage and created a divorce.
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I think that that's overreaching.
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Because porneia, it's hard to limit porneia to that.
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But that is the perspective of the permanence position, that that issue of sexual immorality, that that's it.
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It's not talking about any other type, but only one type.
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I think that's hard to read into the text, but there are those who take that position.
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The second position is that of abandonment.
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1 Corinthians 7 and verse 15 says this, But if the unbelieving partner separates, let it be so.
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In such cases, the brother or sister is not enslaved.
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God has called you to peace.
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This is the Apostle Paul speaking on the subject of marriage.
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And some people say, well, what that means is that if a believing person is living with an unbelieving person, if the unbelieving person leaves, then that voids the marriage and that person is then free to remarry.
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So of those who take the perspective that there are reasons for divorce, the only two from a biblical perspective that would allow for one of the people involved to be considered an innocent person would be the issue of sexual immorality or abandonment.
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If you take that perspective.
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Now, in the faith, even among godly men, there are differences of opinion on this issue.
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I love Votie Bauckham.
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He's one of my favorite preachers.
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And Votie is firmly standing on the permanency position.
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That's where he is.
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That no divorce is ever allowed.
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Ever.
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In any case.
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I also love R.C.
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Sproul.
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R.C.
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Sproul stands on the position that sexual immorality and abandonment both would create an innocent party in the relationship that they could then remarry and it be justifiable.
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That they could be forgiven because they've done nothing wrong.
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Essentially, they're innocent spouse in that situation.
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So it's interesting that there is such a divide among men who would gladly worship together and preach together and both have preached on the same stage, but would differ on this issue.
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But here's what I want us to consider today.
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Even if we did say that we think divorce should be allowed on the grounds of sexual immorality and on the grounds of abandonment.
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If we said those are the only two that would make an innocent spouse, you would have to agree, if you were at all intellectually honest, that the majority of divorces which occur even within the church are absolute assaults on the purpose of God for marriage.
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And they're typically not bound by those two things.
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People get divorced for all kinds of reasons.
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You know what the worst term that's been offered into our vernacular in the last century? No fault divorce.
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It's a lie.
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It's a lie.
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Like abortion, divorce has become the sin of convenience.
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Well, God will forgive me later, so I'm going to do what I want to do now.
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People get so upset about gay marriage.
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They get so upset about homosexuality in marriage.
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And yes, homosexuality is a sin.
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The act is a sin.
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And the marriage is a codification of sin.
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I have no doubt about this.
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This is what the Scripture clearly teaches.
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However, don't come and tell me all about how bad it is and then support divorce.
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The most serious problem in the world today regarding divorce is not whether there's biblical justification on some grounds.
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The real problem today is that divorce has become the first and quickest option that most people use in regard to their relationship that they don't think is going the way they want it to.
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I'm not happy, so I'm getting out.
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I heard an elderly couple one time say this.
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They've been married for 70 years or something.
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And somebody asked them, how did you make it work? And they said, because when we were kids, when something broke, we fixed it.
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We didn't throw it away and buy another one.
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And that's the way people are today.
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We get tired of something, so we get rid of it and get something new.
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It is a sad reality that most people, including many Christians, couldn't care less about what the Bible says in regard to this issue.
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And I'm saying this.
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I can say that from a clearly empirical research because I've sat in on so many marriages.
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It's not always our church.
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People call me.
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I do a lot of counseling outside of the church.
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People call me for marriage counseling.
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People that y'all will never meet.
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And I've looked men dead in the face.
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And I have said, the Bible tells me and you that the divorce that you are seeking is not biblical.
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And you know the response? I don't care.
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Well, then why did you come to me? She made me.
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That's a direct quote.
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I'm here to shut her up.
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But I'm done.
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You don't care that you're sinning against God who created you.
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Nope.
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You don't care that what you're about to do is going to destroy a relationship that the two were supposed to become one flesh.
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Nope.
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The authority of God's Word in this area of modern life is rarely respected, often mocked, and sadly, is one of the main reasons why our society is slowly drifting into the precipice of hell.
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Now, I want to conclude with something very important.
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I made sure not to leave this part out because I'm preaching to a large group.
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I'm not having a conversation with one person.
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And there may be those of you out there that are sitting there dealing with this, and you may ask this.
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You might say, well, I've been divorced maybe multiple times.
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I've been wrong in divorces and I know it.
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What do I do? Is there any restoration or am I condemned to live the life of a perpetual adulterer? It's an important question, don't you think? It may be what's on the heart of some of you.
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And I wanted to make sure that I didn't leave this part out, so I want to ask that you pay attention just for a few more moments as I address this very, very important subject.
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Because the reality is none of you can change the past.
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None of you can go back a year ago, five years ago, ten years ago, thirty years ago and do something different.
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None of us have a time machine.
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Some of you need to know where to go from here.
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1 John 1, verse 8.
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If we say we have no sin, we deceive ourselves and the truth is not in us.
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Verse 9.
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If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us of our sins and cleanse us from all unrighteousness.
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If we say we have not sinned, we make Him a liar and the truth is not in us.
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Beloved, every one of us has sinned.
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Every one of us has sinned grievously.
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And God has promised two things to everyone who calls upon Him.
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Number one, He says, if we confess our sins, He will forgive us and He will cleanse us.
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Divorce is a sin.
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Divorce is not an unforgivable situation.
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But we have to repent.
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We have to recognize.
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We have to own our sin.
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If we refuse to admit our sin, if we refuse to recognize our sin, all we are doing is continuing to live in impenitence.
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We have to recognize our sin.
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Somebody says, well, I've gone on to marry someone else.
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Should I leave them and go back to my partner? No, don't break another vow.
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You're where you are now.
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We've got to start where you are.
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And wherever you are now is where we're starting from.
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Recognize your sin.
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Repent of your sin.
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Call on Christ and start fresh.
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It's all you can do.
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It's all David could do.
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David killed Uriah.
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He couldn't send Bathsheba back to her husband.
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He was long dead and gone.
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He started from where he was.
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He called upon God to forgive him.
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And he lived a new life.
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It's all you can do.
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As Christians, we need to have and stand for a proper understanding of marriage.
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We need to stand for one man and one woman.
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We need to stand for that togetherness, that union.
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And we need to stand for the principle of for life.
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It's not just about one man and one woman.
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That part is the easy part.
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It's the for life that we have to commit to.
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No others.
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True to her alone or to him alone till death do us part.
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That's the model that Christ provides as the husband of the church to his bride.
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For he will never leave us nor forsake us.
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And he's commanded every husband in this room.
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Husbands, love your wives as Christ loved the church.
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And wives, see that you respect your husbands.
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That's the command.
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That's the goal.
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And beloved, I pray for every one of you because every one of you are in a different situation today.
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I pray that you are going to leave this place having had a better understanding of marriage and the relationship therein than when you came.
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And that you've heard the truth of the Gospel.
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That there is no sin that you have committed that Christ cannot and has not atoned for if you call upon Him in faith.
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So let's pray.
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Father, thank You.
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Thank You for Your Word.
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Thank You for the truth.
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Thank You for conviction under which we all sit in regard to sin.
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Because sin in all of our lives reminds us of just how desperately we need Christ.
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I pray, O Lord, I pray for those in the room who have experienced divorce.
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I pray, Lord, that You will help them to see what they may need to repent of.
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And Lord God, to move forward in faith in You.
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I pray, Lord, that You'll open up the hearts of the young people in the room to understand better what marriage is and what You have called us to in marriage.
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A lifetime commitment of love and affection and a relationship which is founded on the bedrock of the Gospel.
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I pray, O Lord, I pray that You would move on all of us.
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That You would convert hearts, change minds, and draw us all closer to You.
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In Christ's name we pray, Amen.