Enemies Within The Walls: Lack Of Love (part 1)

Father in heaven Lord, we come before you this morning. Just thankful to be here and Thankful as we see the evidence of the change of seasons Lord. We want to pray for those who are still traveling here that they'll be able to do so safely in light of all the water.

Lord we're thankful for your promise that you will no longer flood the earth and father while I'm thinking about it. Would you Open the eyes of those who will go see a A movie this week that Portends to be about pretends to be about you and father.

I just pray that you would open up the eyes of those who see it and to their sin their need of a Savior. That you will indeed judge the earth. Even though it will not be a by a flood father. Would you bless us this morning as we look to your word as we?

Think about the things of the church and the church body. Would you bless us this morning in Christ's name we pray. Amen. Well, I've been gone seems like for a very long time and It's a blessing to be here with you this morning.

Just don't shake my hand. That's all I can say. Okay, so we've been talking about Enemies within the walls and really what I would say their attitudes and actions that we Either take or fail to take as I look for my water bottle.

Um. That have a note this deleterious effect on the body of Christ. Wow, that's not even in my notes. They have a negative impact on our unity on our growth spiritually as a church even on the relationships that we have with one another and I mentioned low those many weeks ago even in our homes how between a husband or wife between parents and their children they can these things can have a an impact on our workplace just numerous places and Just real quickly.

Lack of Forgiveness and the Need to Forgive as God Forgives

Number one problem in it and I want to mention this one over and over and over again because I just don't think. No matter how many times I say it it just seems like it doesn't penetrate a Lack of forgiveness people failing to forgive.

And when I say a lack of forgiveness, well, what does that mean? It means I want us to forgive in light of what we've been forgiven by God all of our sins in Christ by his death. We ought to be a forgiving people.

So here's here's an example of what's not forgiveness. And this I think is very common in a within a marriage. Maybe it's not in your marriage. So just bear with us for those of you who have spotless flawless marriages husband or wife.

Get into a dispute about a particular incident. Who left the cheese in the refrigerator that got all moldy and you know, whatever whatever the incident is they Discuss it. Maybe their voices get raised or whatever.

And so finally one person goes the other and asks for forgiveness and it's granted and the other person says would you forgive me, too? Yes, yes. Yes, then the next time the cheese is left in the refrigerator gets all moldy and stuff like that.

Well last time you did. That's not forgiveness and that's just a small Example because it's usually not about cheese in the refrigerator something about something else. But forgiveness isn't. I'm gonna table it for a while and then we'll revisit it later when you offend me again.

Forgiveness is what? What is forgiveness? It's gone. It's history. If God says I forgive you all your sins, and I'm putting them behind my back as it were I am Removing them from you as far as East is from the West and what is he saying?

He's saying that when I look East I see you. What and I'm not even looking West because that's where your sins are. In other words, the two are so far apart that they're not even within my sight. That's what God says.

That's how we are to forgive and and I think we if we're honest we often fail in that. We tend to keep accounts. Our forgiveness is not what it should be and I and I think that's true in our homes. I think it's true in a lot of different places and and that's why I just want to keep stressing it.

People talk about self-forgiveness and I'm like, you know, you'd have a hard time finding that in the Bible. It's very popular in psychological circles, you know. Or pop music. I Love to forgive myself.

Because I have to be right with myself. No, you don't you need to be right with God you need to treat others. Rightly, we've talked about controlling our tongues about gossip, I Mean just imagine, you know some of the things that we think are okay to say about other people, you know, because either We hope they'll never find out about it or because we don't really like them that much anyway.

And we're gonna talk about that a little bit more but just imagine saying some of the things that you're willing to say about other people saying them about your spouse. About your Brother or sister. Maybe you do talk about your spouse your brother or sister like that.

I mean how many of us have co-workers? I used to hear this all the time, you know. What do they call their wives at work? The ball-and-chain. You know. What whatever they want to call her and you know, what do wives call their husbands?

Which you know, I guess that's not so bad. I don't mind being called the old man because a I am old and be I'm a man but. You know people have these pejoratives that they call each other. They take these in the workplace and they you know, and they'll tell stories about their spouses.

I mean, why would you go to work and complain about your spouse? What's that? They're there to hear it. So there are willing audience and everybody likes to complain about you know, that's just a national pastime.

It's just wrong. It's sinful. But if we shouldn't be willing to do that. Then why would we think it's okay to talk about other people within the body of Christ? Within our family anybody. And you know again I had somebody a long time ago say to me, you know, well it's not gossip if it's true.

There's a major flaw in that. Well, and let me put it in biblical terms. Love exposes a multitude of sins. Survey says. Love covers the multitude of sins. If I love somebody I don't want to run around and go.

Hey, guess what? I heard about so-and-so or I know this to be true so I can tell you. It's gossip. Here's another one. I've heard that involves gossip. You have a need to know. Who has a need to know about somebody else's sin?

What's that? Somebody who could be hurt. Okay. Do you have an example or a thought on that one? Okay. Sexual predator. Let's take it out of the criminal realm for a moment. I don't know how to tell you this but a burglar just moved into your neighborhood has been right.

Yeah, I think that's right. Okay. Yeah, you know what you you so-and-so's a babysitter. That's great. I had her over my house and half my possessions were gone after she left. Yeah, no, I I think those are okay, but even so let's just take the babysitter example.

You know somebody is a terrible babysitter. Then do you you know? Email all your friends by the way. You know, this person's a terrible babysitter or do you tell the person? Hey, you were terrible. If you did this this than this again, or you know, if somebody asked me for a reference I'm not gonna be able to recommend you that'd be better way to handle it.

And so the point is if somebody is sinned who has right to know and need to know the person themselves. You go to them. You know, there's a biblical way to handle sin and it's not to go around and Gossip about it to spread it around is to handle it in private.

You know Matthew 18 if your brother sins. Tell somebody else. No. Reprove him in private. Tell him his fault in private. We've talked about a lack of edifying language. That being building up if you're going to say something to someone the objective should be to build them up to edify them and again, these these things have a negative impact in our homes, I mean you know if you want if you want to foster a Relationship between you and your spouse.

There are a couple ways you can do it one is to insult them and just hope they'll get over it. Another one is to find ways to encourage them and to edify them and to build them up you know if I if I tell my wife and Trust me.

I don't say this if I if I tell my wife that you know, her cooking is lousy. I You know, I really wish she'd do this this this instead of what she does. That she's gonna go well, you know what my favorite person in the world to hang out with the Steve.

Because he just dumps on me all the time and I love that. We want to edify that doesn't mean that just you have to lie by the way. It just means that you look for ways to build one another up instead of tearing them down.

Any thoughts on those before we move back to where we were here. Well, I think even I more so with believers, but I think even with unbelievers well, and you know what, let me just address this too because this is this is a common problem in marriages is That one person or the other decides that they need to what I call play the Holy Spirit.

You know, I'm going to be your spiritual life coach. You know, I can't help but notice sweetheart That you aren't having your devotions. It seems to me like you're not praying enough when I hear you talk.

I Just don't sense the Holy Spirit's presence in your life. It's one way of going about it. I don't know that it's necessarily the best. So what do we do? If we have an unbelieving spouse, I mean the the Bible is pretty clear that we submit to our Unbelieving husband so that he may be one without a word.

Now I happen to think that's probably one of the more difficult passages in all the Bible because it's hard enough if we look at Ephesians 5 and we say, you know wives submit to your own husbands as The church does Christ that's difficult.

But if he's living out his part of Ephesians 5 that is Loving his wife like Christ loved the church. It's easier to submit but if you have an unbelieving husband then he is Maybe not having he doesn't have that picture Doesn't have the Holy Spirit.

So then what well Peter tells us Submit anyway, and we need to keep in mind that in the days of Peter husbands were allowed to do a Lot worse things than they're allowed to do now. So, I mean I think it is a very rough rough commandment, but There's just no getting away around that.

Now getting back into How do we? Build one another up regardless of What the situation is whether we're married to a believer or unbeliever. I Think we we try to emphasize the positive. So many Difficulties in marriage come by what focusing on the negative in it and I'll tell you when this starts I tell young young couples fact when people are newly married every time I see them.

I say How's married life? Okay, and it's so encouraging for the first little while. It's great. I love it. It's the best. Well some point, you know, it turns out. It's okay, you know, it could be worse we're surviving.

I Don't know how much longer we can make it. I mean, you know, it's just this kind of thing like this because what happens is somewhere usually generally although this never happened to us. Somewhere in the first 18 months to three years, you know, you wake up one day and you realize that.

You know your wife. It's not perfect. Your husband doesn't pick up his clothes all the things that you overlooked for a while all of a sudden now. They're like major. And so what happens is you start focusing on the imperfections and we kind of get into that habit of focusing in on the mistakes the imperfections and emphasizing those and If you do that instead of telling your spouse what you're thankful for.

Then what happens over time. I Could only tell you this if somebody only says negative things or they mostly say negative things to you it wears you down. I don't care who you are how optimistic you are if somebody just constantly picks at you sooner or later.

Your attitude towards them changes. So I think you know. We need to be not just saying positive things but really focusing on positive things. Because there's a reason you married them in the first place.

You need to be focused on those reasons and not just thinking. Oh, he doesn't pick up his socks. I've made the biggest mistake in my life there's some good there ladies and Eventually as my wife will tell you he will learn to pick up his socks.

Maybe well, let's move on. Like you to open your Bibles to John chapter 15, and if somebody would read verses 12 to 15, please. Really want to talk. We we started talking weeks ago about loving the brethren.

Yeah, will now how often do we hear that? Passage there that little segment of it greater. Love has no one than this. That someone laid down his life for his friends. We hear it. I imagine we probably even heard of this week and You know with the Boston firefighters.

Now that's a great example of bravery. And I have the deepest sympathy for the families. But is that the focus of this passage here in John 15 is he really trying to say everybody who you know, every soldier who throws themselves on a grenade or.

Every policeman who jumps in the way of a shot that's intended for somebody else or you know. Is that is that the focal point there what's that? Being being a disciple of Christ in in in what sense do you suppose?

Yeah, Bruce and that is absolutely right. He's saying.

This is how much I love you. This is the greatest love of all, you know, and if we say that you know the greatest love of all Is happening to me? Learning to love yourself is not the greatest love of all.

The greatest love of all is that Christ the innocent perfect spotless Lamb of God would willingly. Even I would dare say eagerly Go to the cross for you and you say eagerly. Well, we're about the Garden of Gethsemane.

Well, he was human. But he willingly and eagerly wanted to do all the Father's will. No greater. Love is this than your creator has Died for you. And he says listen in light of that. How should you live.

And I'm going to suggest this morning that love For your brothers and sisters in Christ is not optional your Lord commands it. The Lord exhibits his love for your brothers and sisters and that we Demonstrate our friendship.

Our reciprocity for the love of Christ if we do what he commands. I Mean imagine saying this I am his. I am Christ, but I have no obligation to obey him. I Am Christ, but I have no obligation to love the brethren that to love those whom he loves.

Let's look at John 13. Just back a couple of chapters Verses 34 and 35 and would somebody read those please? I Think that second verse there is weighty. All people this is a demonstration of the world.

That we are disciples of Christ if we love one another. I think that's very weighty. You know, what is Bethlehem Bible Church known for. Is it known for the love that we have for one another. Leon Morris said this he said this is the one place in this gospel in the Gospel of John where Jesus uses the term new.

Where he actually speaks it the content of the commandment is given very simply love one another. Jesus is not speaking here of love to all people. But of love within the community of believers. It is presented as the marching order for the newly gathering messianic community.

Love itself is not a new commandment, but an old one but the new thing appears to be the mutual affection that Christians have for one another on Account of because of Christ's great love for them. This is in keeping with what I was what we were talking about in John 15.

It was new because the love of Christ's friend for Christ's friends for Christ's sake Was a new thing. Jesus himself had set the example. He calls on them now to follow in his steps. He's not asking them to do anything more than what he has done.

And he goes on to say that this is a distinguishing feature of Christ's followers. All people will know that they are Jesus disciples if and only if they love one another. Let's want MacArthur how MacArthur frames this.

Listen this very clearly. It is natural to the believer to love another believer natural. It comes naturally. It is just part of what? Being born again. I've given the illustration before but you know, I Have to admit before I got saved.

I was a I was a roadblock to the gospel. I was a A stop sign. You know if the When when somebody came in to preach the inmates and they said, you know, where can I do this or where can I do? That or you know, how do I get the inmates out?

I would do everything I could to slow them down or to stop them altogether. Why was that. Well because I thought it was a waste of time. Inmates were a waste of time. They were they just wanted to get out of their dorms and that was a waste of my time and then what happened.

I Get saved and all of a sudden I started thinking I'm going. I can remember telling one chaplain. You know He was putting these guys now we would have If I can give you a little picture here if I'm facing this way I have four dorms full of inmates facing me and this is my staff station here and I'm responsible for those guys.

Well over here on this side. There would be like there was a little what we call a day room and it was open with this reinforced glass so I could see into it and we would send the chaplain into that room and He would go in there and we would let inmates out from not just from those four dorms.

But from four dorms on the other side and then the upper floor. Which you couldn't see from here. You can't really see it. Anyway would have the same thing four more dorms on each side. So there's 16 dorms and however many inmates up to a point who wanted to go to church.

We were let down and they would come down and they would all meet in that day room. And so there are probably 60 70 inmates in there it's all that would want to go to church and I remember one Sunday morning just going because I was I was newly saved and I had a stretch of four months in a row where my schedule not overtime.

My schedule was I had to work 16 hours on Sunday so no church for me and. And I said, you know, would you mind just kind of leaving those doors open so I can you know. Cuz normally would lock him in there so I could just Hear the inmates singing and after you guys get done singing then we'll close the door.

I just wanted something, you know. Some kind of fellowship. That was my fellowship on Sunday was just listening the inmates saying little difference in my Approach plus I would talk to the chaplains and ask him questions.

I didn't know anything. So I'd just be asking questions one of them actually Gave me our sufficiency in Christ a John MacArthur book. That was the first gift I ever got. First Christian gift I ever got.

But it's natural it comes naturally to us. We just we have a change of attitude all the things that we hated all the people that we hated we we feel differently about MacArthur again, he says it's another level of love.

It's a level of love that demonstrates itself in magnanimous self-effacing Self-sacrificing affection. I want to read that again and just think about I I'm not gonna ask anybody, you know, if you do this.

But just ask yourself personally if This sounds like you it's a level of love that demonstrates itself in magnanimous Self-effacing self-sacrificing affection to love the way Jesus loved. That's the newness he says.

Because there had never been an example like that. There's a newness in the command once you see it exhibited in Christ and then he says That's how you should love one another and by this all men will know that you are my disciples if you have love for one another.

But Carther says you could tell a true Christian because he loves other believers. We're talking about the family here is Impossible for a true believer not to love other believers. That is a distinguishing mark of the presence of a loving God.

God loves us because he loves us. He's taken residence in our lives and manifests that very love through us the Holy Spirit's taken up residence in you and in that sense, you know, it's kind of like those movies where I don't know what kind of movie it's like.

But you you sort of you sort of just like no not that you can see, you know Spiritually The Holy Spirit in somebody else, but when you go to a church that's like-minded when you meet somebody else. That's like-minded.

It doesn't take very long before you recognize that bond. You don't think you know, I'm kind of I'm not too sure about you. We were down at when we were down in Orlando we went to a church there on Sunday morning and I'm not just saying this it was basically like being here.

There was no difference the people were great and How does that happen how can you just go anywhere around the world and you know suddenly just Laying on a church on Sunday and you just kind of feel the same way it's just a natural affection.

Why. Because we all belong to Christ. We all have the Holy Spirit. We may not agree on every Particular doctrine. But we love the Lord. We love his word. We love to hear it taught. We love to sing his praises.

We all love to edify one another to build one another up and there's just that Sense that we all belong together now. So what about a lack of love? What about lacking that? Sense of self-sacrificial self-effacing love.

Let's look at first Thessalonians 4 9 now concerning brotherly love Paul writes you have no need for anyone to write to you. For you yourselves have been taught by God to love one another. What does that tell us?

What does that tell us about a lack of? love for one another. What if there are folks in the church who seem to lack that love for one another that concern that Fellowship that bond what is it? What what would this even imply to us?

What's that? They might not be saved. Because he writes the Thessalonians you've been taught by God to love one another. Well. You know just by the virtue of the example of Christ we think here's how much Christ loved us and Sacrificed himself, but we're not willing to sacrifice ourselves for others and not so much not in a life-or-death sense.

But we're not willing to put ourselves out. What are some practical ways that we can show love and affection for one another? Will praying for one another is good. Visiting is good. Okay caring for the needs of others.

Yeah, piggy. Okay, discipling them investing in their lives coming alongside them. Yep. Okay, the way we interact good. Now what's it? Maybe I I'm gonna. I'm gonna go out on a limb here. What's maybe the easiest way?

Possible. To show that you care about your brothers and sisters in Christ will give them a hug. Don't even try that pal. No, that's that's a good way. You know I mean can it be any easier than that. But but you know what it's but I seriously I think maybe on Sundays we ought to just hand out visors.

When you come in and so you could just like like this so that we could all just with the maximum efficiency file in and file out and not see anybody else because. That that would be pretty good, you know it would be the least offensive way that we could.

I Just but it just seems to me like sometimes Saying hi would be nice. I Just think we sometimes get so and by the way that does mean you know 90 people have to say hi to me after this class but Sometimes I think we're in such a rush to get home or to you know beat the rush on the parking lot folks this isn't the The the Boston Garden here you're not gonna get stuck in two hours of traffic if you don't you know I Just take a couple minutes to just say hi to greet somebody after the service.

Bob. Yeah, and and that's a great point. You know clicks, and I will admit. I do belong to a click. No, it's true. There there are four people that I really like to hang out with more than anybody else they happen to be my grandchildren, but soon be five.

But it's and you know. They're they're new so they weren't out there welcome yet. What do they get older? But it's it's good to just kind of go you know I haven't talked to so-and-so for a while I'm gonna go talk to them.

You know I haven't seen this person for a while. I mean there are people and I got an email last week from one there are people who Can just kind of disappear for a while, and maybe nobody even notices.

Send an email and it took him like a couple weeks to get back to me, and he's been gone for a variety of reasons but there are. You know there are people who maybe aren't so. You know they're they're not as cool as I don't know some other people.

You know. But it's good to greet. It's yeah, I heard that throat clearing. It's good, it's good to greet people that you don't normally greet. It's good to try to get around and to fellowship with other people.

So I mean I just don't know how much easier it could be to just let somebody know that you know that they're there. Could be a kind of small thing, but it's it's nice. MacArthur goes on he says. Talking about Peter.

He says one of his favorite comments about this love that believers have is found in 1st Peter 1 22 and he says since you have in obedience to the truth Purified your souls, and he's talking about salvation.

Peter is. Since you've come you've heard the truth you believed your soul has been purified and. Why he says listen to this MacArthur's kind of excited he goes unto a sincere love of the brethren. Your soul has been purified you've been bought with a price.

And part of that price is to love the brethren. He's saying this is who you are. You believe the truth your soul was cleansed it produced a genuine love for the brethren and since that has happened. Fervently love one another from the hearts.

The command is based upon the capacity God has given us a capacity to love one another and he says we ought to do it fervently. MacArthur says we need to exercise that love to the max. Exercise it to the max.

And again, just think about what it was like. Before you were saved. Let's look at go back to John or John 15. Before salvation, how did you feel about Christians? I was indifferent to them. I didn't know them.

Well, that's actually not true. You hated them. John 15 verses 18 and 19 if someone would read that please. John 15 verses 18 and 19. Yeah, go ahead George. Thank you, you know, you might think that you were neutral before.

You were saved but you weren't you hated Christians. Why. Because you hated Christ you hated God. MacArthur gives a good illustration. He cites Gore Vidal. Author late author. I think he passed here in the last year or two.

This is again Gore Vidal. He says some of us a group of like-minded souls. Got together just to discuss informally who we might back to be president in the next election. We want a leader who won't lie to us Mr. Bush he was talking about George W Bush is a come-to-Jesus kind of fellow who believes he's doing God's work and That explains why Tony Blair has gotten along with him.

He too is a secret Jesus lover and together they're very dangerous. Then MacArthur says that's really the bottom line, isn't it the people who hate Jesus knows how he calls Tony Blair a secret Jesus lover.

He says it's the people who hate Jesus who hate the people who love Jesus it's the unrighteous who hate the righteous. It's the ungodly who hate the godly because why do they hate him? Why do your unsaved friends no matter how nice they might be to you sometimes they don't like what you stand for.

Your behavior convicts them. Because we call into them into question as to what they believe and how they behave. I mean, I I Think we all have unbelieving friends and you know, I have some on Facebook and they disagree with me on almost everything.

Homosexuality Homosexual marriage, whatever it is, whatever the moral issue is and why is that? Why? There's a they're suppressing the truth. Yep Charlie. That's exactly right. Absolute truth. That is an absolute.

I don't even call a line on the sand. Let's just say a line in marble. I guess we could say a line in stone tablets. Absolute truth is the enemy. Why because absolute truth says that there's an absolute truth giver and there will be a day of Judgments and this is what they want to stop.

And it doesn't even matter that they can't stop it in their minds they don't want to believe it's true and they don't want to believe it so much that they suppress the truth and Unrighteousness and therefore they hate God.

They hate you. They hate everything that you stand for and they hope by the way. The reason that they really want to be your friend is they hope and I'm sure a lot of my friends feel this way, too they hope that somehow because they recognize there's a certain modicum of intelligence in my Person they hope that the light will come on and I'll be enlightened and I'll realize that all the stuff I've believed is nonsense.

That there is no God. That's that's the goal. That's what they ultimately wouldn't you know. What if I would if I went on Facebook this afternoon and said, you know what? I've come to realize there is no God, you know, how many of my friends would like that a Lot of them, of course my Christian friends would drop me like a hot rock, but The atheists would do what?

They'd be like, yes. They probably write some kind of song or something, you know. Yeah. Yeah, I saw the light, you know only to be it backwards. Yeah, we were all we were all we all were there. It's it and you know.

So again what I always when I try to stress with when I'm discussing things with them, you know, one of them said well Why are you so against this Noah thing? Anyway, you know and they mentioned that they were thinking about going to see it if You know thus and such a scene was going to be in it and and and I said no it wasn't and they were like Oh too bad, you know or whatever.

But here's here's the point. Why are they? That they Just genuinely want you to abandon the truth so that you'll be like them because they we were like them. They want us to return to that kind of mentality.

And MacArthur again, he says by its hatred the world reveals its true character. Listen. Cain hated Abel. People hated Jesus. Jewish leaders hated him. They hated the Apostles and they martyred all but one and they exiled him.

Throughout the history of the church. The church's leaders have been hated the Reformers the nonconformists persecuted hated and even today There are more Christians being persecuted for the cause of Jesus Christ than ever in history.

Tens of thousands dying all over the world under the hateful murderous people who are the children of the devil, even if many of them belong to the so-called religion of peace, right. They hate God they hate Christ.

They hate anyone who represent him who represents him and they can't get it God. They can't get it his son. And so what are they gonna do? They're gonna hate you persecute you. So when we gather here, I think there are a few things that should happen.

First of all, we should recognize that how blessed we are not to be facing Persecution like they are really around the world. We think we have it rough because You know, they may impose some kind of mandate on us that we don't particularly like we think we have it rough because someday I'm sure they're gonna seize our tax-exempt status.

Because we won't marry homosexuals or because we teach that homosexuality is a sin or whatever the You know judicial Cause is going to be. We gather here today. We had a Everyday we had a rejoice about that.

But we ought to be thinking about our brothers and sisters around the world who are persecuted. We have thank God that we're not being persecuted. But more than anything else. We had a look around this room and go.

These are the people. We hope who will stand with us. When persecution comes these are the people who will love us into the end. These are not the people that are gonna be throwing logs under the fire while they're burning us.

They're gonna be pleading for our lives. They're gonna be taking care of the loved ones that we leave behind when that happens. This is what it means to be the family price. What do you what do you suppose happens in those places where persecution is happening?

Where they take away the leaders they take away who whoever they take away and we never see them again. You know, do you think the rest of the church just goes boy? That's really gonna be rough on Steve's family.

Boy, I hope I hope Janet is you know, well taken care of by the state. I hope you know, the welfare system kicks in for I don't think that's what happens at all. I think they look around and they go we got to do something to help Janet.

We have to do something to help these kids. That's love. That's love and I think in the years to come as time goes on maybe not in my lifetime. Because I'm planning on leaving on Thursday. But I said leaving no, no.

Maybe not in my lifetime. But I think maybe in our kids or our grandkids lifetimes things things we can already see. I mean, it's amazing. It is absolutely amazing if you would have said when I was in high school.

Which I guess was a while ago if you would have said 20 years ago. You know that homosexual marriage would be like the social issue and that you know. Majority of Americans would approve of that people would have thought you were nuts.