A WOW Moment - 1 Cor. 1:27 31 & Isaiah 61:1 3

Hi, everybody. Welcome to our Bible study tonight.

I'm Vicki, as you know, and this is Mercedes. You should know her by now. But we are honored to be in the home of Miss Kim McCowan tonight.

And we're very honored to be here, by the way. It's our first time here. Because they just moved here not long ago.

It's lovely. Look at this decoration. Do you recognize most of those things on the wall?

Oh, I do recognize most of those things. They came from my children.

That's so sweet. I'm sorry. Kim and her husband were youth leaders in our church for quite some years when my grown kids were in the youth.

So, anyways. So, tonight, Kim has chosen two different verses she would like to study with us.

And, Kim, what were those two verses? So, it was 1 Corinthians 1, 27 through 29.

And then Isaiah 61, 1 through 3. It said, God has chosen what is foolish in the world to shame the wise.

And God has chosen what is weak in the world to shame the strong. God has chosen what is insignificant and despised in the world, what is viewed as nothing, to bring to nothing what is viewed as something, so that no one can boast in his presence.

But it is from him that you are in Christ Jesus, who became God -given wisdom for us, our righteousness, sanctification, and redemption, in order that, as it is written, the one who boasts must boast in the

Lord. The spirit of the Lord God is on me, because the Lord has anointed me to bring good news to the poor.

He has sent me to heal the brokenhearted, to proclaim liberty to the captives and freedom to the prisoners, to proclaim the year of the

Lord's favor and the day of our God's vengeance, to comfort all who mourn, to provide for those who mourn in Zion, to give them a crown of beauty instead of ashes, vests of oil instead of mourning, and splendid clothes instead of despair, and they will be called righteous trees planted by the

Lord to glorify him. All right. Now Kim told, or not told us, but informed us earlier that she, that she links these two verses together.

So what we're going to do is we're going to let her explain to us.

So Mercedes and I are probably going to learn something tonight. And I'm excited because I'm ready to take some notes down.

So take it away, Miss Kim. Okay. So I'm going to rewind about, it's been right at about three years.

People who know me and our family know what happened about three years ago, but David and I were about separated and just a lot was going on.

And it was just really rough.

I realized that a lot of things, but realized that I had not trusted him with a lot of stuff. I grew up not in a good house at all.

I always felt just very lonely, insecure, unloved.

It was just, it was rad. I didn't know how to cope with things or deal with things. And I didn't realize that at that time.

So our marriage was crumbling. He stepped down from his position as pastor, but I realized it wasn't just our marriage.

I've grown to kind of despise every, not despise, but grow sick of ministry people, just stuff.

But it was because I wasn't right. I don't know.

I was a Christian. There was no doubt about it, but there was just something not there. So anyway,

I realized I need to work on everything. Like God showed me, we're just going to go right back down to everything, to the basics, because you got to learn this stuff.

So my sister -in -law had been on me for a few years to do her abortion recovery class that she taught.

And I was like, I'm fine. I'm good with it. Nobody, like it was when

I was 16. It wasn't my choice. But finally

I was like, you know what? We're just going to do this. We're just going to make it better. So that was the first step was meeting with her.

And I was not coming to church anymore. I wasn't really welcome at that point. Dave and I were kind of talking a little bit here and there, but Angie and I met every single week and did this study.

And I realized so many things through that. That I had not dealt with it.

I had not processed it. That I had all this grief that I didn't even know was there.

And she faithfully worked with me through that. During that time as well,

I started meeting with Crane Angwin. And just digging down deep, finding roots of all kinds of stuff.

Can I interrupt for just a second? Because you know, Kim, honestly, I've known you for many, many years now.

And you didn't show any of, I mean, you didn't show, you had on a good mask,

I guess. Oh, yeah. I didn't feel like I was okay to share that.

Like I felt so insecure and insignificant and that I had to portray a certain thing to be accepted.

But it was killing me. Because I just felt like I could not be me, ever.

I didn't even know who me was at all. And so Gwen and Karina started meeting with me every week.

And we met every Wednesday up until just a few months ago. And throughout all this time,

Deb and I were trying to work on each other, trying to figure stuff out. But these two verses, especially the first one,

I love it. Because it's God speaking and saying, I choose what people see as insignificant.

And I heard it in that, it's in the book that we did. And I heard it and I read it and it just kind of clicked up here.

And, you know, kind of hung on to it. But it was really just some dark times through there.

A lot of fighting. And then just one thing after another after another kept happening. Lexi left for college.

Dave, after he left the church, didn't have stable work. We ended up losing cars, losing our house, being homeless last year for almost the whole summer.

And through that time, I didn't stop working. I mean, I cried. I asked God, why?

Like, why? I'm working. I'm actually doing what you want me to do. So why does this keep happening?

And he revealed himself to me that, you know, I had to get you to a point where all you did was land on me.

And I wanted so bad to get back in ministry. And I missed it.

And I was like, gosh, the things that I complained about. And it was hard because I lost so many relationships.

And rebuilding those and just feeling so worthless, having the church take care of us for months.

And, you know, just feeling like a failure because I couldn't provide for my kids and just all of those things.

And I started going back and reading this because slowly things started getting better.

And every week Karina would tell me, Kim, it's not always going to be like this.

And some days I'd be like, okay. And then some days I'm like, I'm so tired of hearing you say that.

You're a broken record. It's not getting better. And it wasn't.

And she would tell me, yeah, it sucks. Nothing that you're going through is easy or good or fun.

Moses wandered the wilderness for 40 years. And I said, well, then kill me. I told her literally one day when she said that.

I said, then you can shoot me now because I'm not doing this for 40 years. And then things just kind of started falling in place.

And I'd call her and give her a glimpse of how this happened today. And there were still some really heartbreaking things, like, see, going to college and, you know, just different stuff.

But I kept coming back to this. And I have notes in here. I used to have to write.

I mean, all of this is filled with writing. But I would have to write, I am not defined by my past. I don't have to be afraid.

These are all my verses that I had to, like, in those moments, just repeat over and over and over again.

And this one, I felt so insignificant and small. And then going back and reading this and knowing that all of it was for a reason and God's using it.

And he's going to continue to use it. And then when you go back to Isaiah, it says he's going to provide comfort and give us beauty instead of ashes and splendid clothes instead of despair.

And both of those just are so personal to me that, you know,

I can see how I've been used, how I can help people.

And it helps me. And also to know that, you know,

God still is going to use you. Because I felt like I was never going to be useful again, ever.

Oh, and you are. And I never thought that I was going to teach again or be taken seriously again or that there were always going to be these little whispers, you know.

And it's hard. I still struggle with it sometimes. But I do teach now again.

And I'm building relationships again with people that were broken. And even at one point,

I remember Dad feeling like such a failure as a husband and a father.

And sharing the verse in Corinthians with him and telling him, you are useful and you have a purpose.

And I just think it's so beautiful how God uses people and the broken things.

Yeah, because in my study Bible, it states,

He has sent me to comfort the brokenhearted and to announce that captives will be released and prisoners will be freed.

Yeah. And that's what I was for a long time, just a prisoner of my own self and feelings and thoughts of unworthiness.

And so many just amazing things have happened since finally just realizing,

Look, I am what God has chosen me to be. And He's working through me.

And just reactions are different. And I'm thinking more, you know.

I didn't know how. I had to learn all that stuff. And um...

He stripped you of your identity. Yes. You want to speak up, babe?

Sorry, I forgot that... We're not supposed to talk. Yeah, I apologize. I've been stripped of my identity before.

It kind of sucks. Oh, it really does. It hurts. It does. It's like ripping off a band -aid.

It's worse than ripping off a band -aid. It's a band -aid made out of duct tape. Yeah. That's dug down deep and like an abscessed sore and crusted up.

Yeah, it really is. I can't even put into words the...

I was telling someone one day, probably about a year or so ago, I said, This has been the fastest, longest two years of my life.

If that makes sense. And she said, I completely get it.

But now, I mean, it's... I'm working. David's working.

The kids are doing well. Lexi and I are talking. And I get opportunities to feel helpful and useful with people.

And that's what makes me happy. It just goes to show that even when bad things happen, good will come out of it.

And it's hard to see at the time. It really is. You're like, how can anything good come with all this whatever is going on?

And then you sit here, fast forward, you know, however many years later, and you're sitting here, and you're given this testimony.

And you might be able to reach somebody who's going through something so similar, and you wouldn't have been able to do that had you not already gone through it, gotten to that finish line with it, saw the light at the end of the tunnel, and now you're able to share it.

Well, you know, I had to be broken. I myself have been broken.

And the thing is, and it's been that the terms have been used so many times before,

God has to break you to mend you to who he wants you to be.

And it's that potter in the potter's hand,

I mean, it's that clay in the potter's hand. That's the whole thing. And I recall all of the issues that you and David were going through.

It was heart -wrenching. But I can also recall when this one back here got broken.

Was it too long ago? It was not. What, just a couple months ago? And we don't understand why the

Lord, okay, at the time, you don't understand why the

Lord is putting you through whatever he's putting you through. I mean, you know, you think, okay, okay,

Lord, I fell down and I skimped my knee. Let's heal it up.

Kiss it, make it feel better. And let's get back to it. It's not that easy.

It's, I fell down, skipped my knee, got drugged 20 miles down the road, on a gravel road.

By my toes. With a pair of shorts on. And then you go through some rubbish and some stickers and some thorns and all this other stuff.

And you're like, is it ever gonna stop? Yeah, that's where I was. I mean,

I just, like I said, I remember telling Karina every week, like, because it was literally something every week.

And there was nothing good for a while. I mean, a while.

And I did not see any kind of light at all. I was in the darkness.

Just, I was still studying. I was still working. I was still doing what I needed to do. And that's what made it so bad.

Is because it just kept getting worse. And, you know, right after we moved in here,

I remember calling her and telling her, I'm starting to see light. That was a really long chapter in this book.

Really long. I think a new one's about to start. And it has. But, I couldn't see it then.

At all. Well, the question I have for you then,

Kim, and this is not going to be a hard one, I don't think. Okay. But, do you think that if you hadn't gone through all that you went through, and all of the heartache, all of the unsureness, all of the questioning, all of the bruises, all of the scrapes, do you think that you would feel that you were the, do you think you would be in the position that you're in now in Christ?

No. Not at all. So, Kim, from what

I'm gathering, you're about as hard -headed as I am. A little bit. I'm a little slow. I have to repeat the grade a few times.

Yup. Yeah, because I wasn't, I mean, I wasn't getting, I wasn't getting all of it.

Gotcha. And, when it says in John, I've come that they may have life and have it abundantly.

I didn't have an abundant life. Because so many things were just so deep -rooted and buried that I didn't even know it.

I had no clue. And I really, truly believe that for God to use me the way that He wants to, that He has and continue to,

I had to get all the way. Drug down the gravel road.

Every single bit. Because I can remember at certain points, like throughout our marriage and, you know, just different things, little things coming up and kind of working on it a little bit.

It was never getting down to the root causes of those. And so I said, I'm a slow learner.

Because I wasn't getting it. I'm like, okay, we're good. And then, you know, something else would come up.

And I'm like, well, where'd that come from? But, I mean, I'm nowhere near where God wants me,

I know. But that's the whole process. But it took getting everything taken.

Everything. And it sucked.

And look at you now. You're well on your way. Back up.

I think you're in the coasting level right now. And I don't want to be in the coasting level.

Right. But it's like. Yeah. It's breathing. Yeah. Because, you know, this is the problem

I have. And I don't know. Maybe y 'all don't. But I'm very sure you do. But, you know, as soon as you get through that and as soon as, no matter how many miles you've been drug down that gravel road, and no matter how long it's taken you to heal, or whatever the lesson was that the

Lord had for you to learn, as soon as you take that plateau to go, it seems like before you can exhale, it's something else.

Yeah. And it was that way after we moved in here, too, because David started working with Marty, doing really well, and making good money, and we were doing good.

And then it got to be cold and rainy, and work was like nothing at all for the weeks.

And David had been applying and applying and nothing. And I'm like, are we really going to get back to that point again?

I was terrified. Like, we just got here. I'm not doing this again.

And then he got a phone call from a friend of Marty's and has a new job now and is doing great at it.

And we've been able to finally get things caught up again. So I think that was just like a little test thrown in there.

Like, okay, I got you here. Are you going to keep trusting? What's cool about this 27 through 31?

Verse 30. Are we in Corinthians? In 1 Corinthians, yeah. Thank you. Verse 30.

But it is from him that you are in Christ Jesus, positional sanctification.

You're positionally placed who became God -given wisdom for us, our righteousness, our sanctification, and redemption.

Going through all of that, you are still in Christ. Plain and simple.

You can't be taken out of that at all. You know, in my

Bible, I actually looked at Verse 26 in 1

Corinthians. Remember, dear brothers and sisters, a few of you were wise.

In the world's eyes. That's the we -have -to -get -out -of -the -worldly state of fixating on the world.

And honestly, Kim, my upbringing was completely different than yours.

But I've been through two marriages, and they have not been perfect. And I have seen some pretty grave ugly things.

And I've been drugged, probably down that same road you were drugged down, just in different types of gravel.

And, yes, I believe all of us, probably a lot of people that are watching have probably been drugged or possibly could be being drugged as we speak and going through some trials.

But the one thing I have learned in the last three or four years is that without the test, you don't have a testimony.

Exactly. And without that test, the only thing the test does is just draw you closer to Him.

Make you realize that you cannot do it without Him. Because if we could, we wouldn't read.

And that's like, I was kind of left, I can't remember what it was on, I think the other day, your just regular post, but about being in control.

And that's where I was. In my head, I had everything under control.

My post? I think, because you said you had to learn to give up control. Oh, honey, that was the hardest lesson for me.

Right, yeah, because I thought that my, how

I acted, how I did things, how this, you know, all of that was me having control of things, and it wasn't at all.

It was God going, okay. Sit down. They're there. Right. Yeah. I don't know,

I don't know if y 'all have experienced this, but I've had to learn how to give up control, and then something else will happen, and I'll have to relearn how to do that again, because apparently

I forgot. Can I leave a ring on your table? It's fine, I'm about to paint it.

And hearing you talk about that, and hearing where you were and all that, the insignificance that you felt and the insecurities in you lost you, you lost who you were, throws me back to Galatians 4 -7.

Therefore you are no longer a slave, but God's child, and since you were God's child, you're also, you've also been made an heir.

That's, that's who you are. You know, that's who we are. We are God's children. Oh, but at that time you sure don't feel that way?

Nope. Nope. You feel completely alone. I was looking at my notes over here.

I wrote this probably like three years ago, but I don't have the reference written down, but this was another one of my favorites, and I've shared it with quite a few people, but it says,

Do not remember the past events. Pay no attention to the things of old. Look, I am about to do something new.

Even now it is coming. Do you not see it? Indeed, I will make a way in the wilderness and river and desert.

And I remember Karina sharing this with me. You don't see it, but it's there.

It's gonna come. And, yeah.

But we don't see it, and not that I'm saying I can't remember the right verse, but what I love so much is everything.

It's past tense, it's present tense, it's all the tenses, because It's every tense. It's, it still means the same thing today.

And it doesn't matter, like, this verse was written to the Israelites, but it still can pertain to our life.

Present tense, like right now. It can pertain to Ken, Benjamin, or Samuel. What's fun, too, is if you go to Luke 4,

It's okay, I know he's home, I know, it's scary. Luke 4, 18 and 19, it says the exact same thing as it says in Isaiah.

Isaiah's Old Testament, Luke's New Testament, you know, however, there's a lot of years in between Isaiah and Luke, and Luke 18 and 19,

And this is, if I'm not mistaken, let me see, this is after the temptation of Jesus, and this is, is that in red?

Mm -hmm. This is Jesus talking to, to, um, who's he talking to?

The Nazareth? The people in Nazareth? Uh, the Galileans. Okay, yeah, the who?

The Galileans? Yeah. Galileans, she said. Galileans. But, so,

Jesus is quoting Scripture from the Old Testament in Isaiah, so it is past.

It is past for him, it was present for him, and it is future for us.

So cool. Thank the Lord he knows no time frames. Right. Well, Kim, wow.

What's the time? It's past. No, we're fine. We're fine. Nobody comes after us. Okay.

So, if we, if we go over, nobody's supposed to be anywhere till 7 o 'clock, that's on the private page.

Okay. So, um, that's why we picked this spot. But, um, this has been, okay, it's been exciting, it's been exciting for me, and the reason why it's been exciting for me is because for one of the women of our church to be able to open up and allow trust, one of the biggest problems

I think women have is trust. Oh, yeah. Especially when it comes to another woman.

But, you know, in our church, I think that we have a nice group of women, a nice -sized group of women.

Many age range, I mean, the age ranges... Are everywhere.

Yes. But I will have to say that, um, that I'm very,

I feel very, I'm very humbled that you shared tonight.

So, thank you very, very, very much. Yeah. Um, we've gone over,

I'm sorry that we went over, oh, half my face was on there. Sorry. Um, but, uh,

I hope that you all have enjoyed this evening with us. Um, again,

Kim, I cannot thank you enough for inviting us over, and, um, she cooked for us.

I was like, what? You got dinner and dessert? And dessert! Dessert.

Dessert. So, oh, um... We can't tell you what she made.

But, uh... But, um, I think now we're going to go have dinner with Kim.

So, uh, I want to thank you all for being here. I want to thank you again. I love you.

I want to thank you all. Really. We might come back. You know, not a lot of people during this

COVID -19 are allowing us in their house. Well, you can come whenever you want. Well, there you go.

Everybody, y 'all heard it. We can come back. So, uh, you got anything? Nope.

All right, go ahead. All right, this has been a wow moment. Thanks, guys. Thank you.